- 1 day ago
Figgy reacts to a hilarious story that could've been a Seinfeld episode, another senior citizen facing decades in prison, and more wild internet stories.
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00:01Pass the aux cord and crank up the volume.
00:05Figgy Figs in the driver's seat.
00:07Sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride.
00:10It's time for Figgy's Mixtape.
00:13Presented by Sheriff Injury Lawyers.
00:15The official personal injury law firm of the Houston Texans.
00:19On Sports Radio 610.
00:22Yes it is the Mixtape presented by Sheriff Injury Lawyers.
00:26On Sports 10.
00:27In the accident? Injured? Don't wait.
00:30Visit CallTheSheriff.com today.
00:33Happy Wednesday to everyone out there.
00:36So remember a few months ago, I played this legendary episode from Seinfeld.
00:43About Kramer getting this ass man license plate.
00:47My name is Kramer, Cosmo Kramer.
00:51Alright, sign right here please.
00:56Thanks.
00:59Ass man?
01:01No, no, these don't belong to me.
01:03I'm not the ass man. I think there's been a mistake.
01:06What's your name again?
01:08Cosmo Kramer.
01:09Cosmo Kramer? You are the ass man.
01:14No, I'm not the ass man.
01:17Well, as far as the state of New York is concerned, you are.
01:23Yes, yes very much.
01:24Yes, so apparently that happened in real life, man.
01:27It happened to a, I want to say she was 76 year old lady.
01:32Oh man, oh man.
01:33So, um, here's what happened.
01:36This is courtesy of KHOU 11.
01:39Um, this happened in Florida.
01:41Okay.
01:41A lady was getting her license plate, got it in the mail.
01:45And something similar happened, just like the Seinfeld episode.
01:49When Nancy Delostritto went to collect her mail, she got quite the surprise.
01:54A new license plate with her vehicle registration renewal.
01:58And I looked at it, and I said, I don't think so.
02:01The plate reads S-Q-Z-A-5-5, but for us, those 5-5s can be read as S's.
02:10Well, you get the picture.
02:12Squeeze blank.
02:14I don't think a woman that lives in a senior community that's going to be 77 years old next month
02:22will be driving around with what this plate has to say.
02:26The plate's become the talk around her retirement community, especially the men.
02:30We were with her when she showed it to one of her 89-year-old neighbors.
02:35And this is what I received from the DMV for my new license plate.
02:39That's good for 10 years.
02:41Good.
02:42Good?
02:43Florida license plates have been made at a state prison in North Florida for almost a century.
02:48Then they're funneled through the county agencies.
02:51Nancy's plate was mailed from the Broward Property Tax Collector's Office.
02:55We went there to try to help her get some answers.
02:59It's a question about a tag, if you want to replace a tag.
03:03And while no one wanted to talk on camera, we were told anyone unhappy with a plate can turn it
03:10in for another one for free.
03:12I'm kind of resigning to it, and I figured maybe it was just destined to be on my car.
03:19So for now, Nancy's keeping the tag, although she is planning to let the state know about it.
03:25She'll see the reaction when she goes public with her new plate.
03:29I can handle it if I get a few honks here and there.
03:33Actually, being over 70, I might like a few honks.
03:36I bet you would.
03:37There's a lot here, man.
03:37I bet you would.
03:38I just looked it up, Figgy.
03:41It looks like it.
03:42It looks like it.
03:43Yeah, why does the Florida font make the five minutes?
03:47They don't even look like five.
03:48And the thing is, the person in jail that was making these, they know what they were doing.
03:52Yes.
03:53You know what also doesn't help?
03:55It's the state of Florida, so it's got a couple oranges in the middle, too.
03:57So it just kind of adds to all of this.
03:59Yeah.
04:01So I've heard some things about those retirement homes, what goes on.
04:04Oh, yeah, yeah.
04:05I'm sure you've heard that.
04:06There's a lot of diseases that move around.
04:08You've seen that 89-year-old man like, dude.
04:10Yeah.
04:11We all have heard those stories.
04:13It's like a bordello in there.
04:15A host.
04:16A bordello.
04:18Am I supposed to know what that is?
04:19Yeah, everybody knows what a bordello is.
04:22713-5724-16.
04:23Some of which went to pay for more porn.
04:26Okay.
04:26I don't like this drop.
04:28I'm going to be honest.
04:28So I think there's a chance where, you know, the grandma in her, presuming she's a grandma,
04:34went, oh, I can't have this.
04:35And then she started thinking and going, I think it'd be pretty cool.
04:38I think it'd be pretty cool.
04:40To me, I mean, towards the end, I'm like, this grandma might be a little freaky.
04:43Yeah.
04:44She might be coming around to it.
04:46Don't mind getting a couple hunks.
04:47Go ahead and squeeze that.
04:50See, I feel like we're getting drops.
04:51That one is not a bad one to have.
04:53Yeah.
04:54And just one more time, if you did not know the plate numbers, it is SQZ-A.
04:585-5.
05:00Mm-hmm.
05:01Why don't y'all go give it to that old lady like that, man?
05:04I think she likes it.
05:05I think she ended up liking this.
05:07All those guys, oh, hey, what's up, squeeze?
05:11You try to make it sound like she was just so heartbroken at the beginning.
05:15Yes.
05:15Yes.
05:16You know what?
05:16Why am I getting a couple hunks here and there?
05:20Mm-mm.
05:21Somebody get their grandma.
05:22Yeah.
05:23Somebody get their grandmother, man.
05:26This is a mistake presented by Sheriff Injury Lawyers on Sports Radio 610.
05:31So, from one 70-year-old lady to another one.
05:34And this one might be a little influenced by, speaking of Squeeze, A-5-5, might be a little
05:41influenced from young Miami.
05:43So, this one could face up to 23 years in prison for scamming a man out of hundreds of thousands
05:52of dollars.
05:53Mm-hmm.
05:53So, let's go to Fox 5 in D.C. with this story.
05:57A Maryland jury just found a 72-year-old woman guilty of scamming a younger man out of more
06:03than $400,000 after they met on a dating website.
06:07So, here's a picture of him.
06:08That's 72-year-old Janae Sears sitting right next to her victim, only identified as a federal
06:14worker in his 50s.
06:16Prosecutors say Sears presented herself online as a Harvard-educated businesswoman, convinced
06:21that man she should move into his house, and then scammed him out of those hundreds of
06:25thousands of dollars between 2021 and 2023.
06:28They say she promised she'd invest that money in Pfizer stock, so he sent checks, wire transfers,
06:33and cash sums, but she took all of it, prosecutors say, bought an Alfa Romeo, gambled away more
06:39than $100,000 of it at casinos, including MGM.
06:44Sears faces up to 23 years in prison.
06:46If she's sentenced to the maximum punishment, that means she wouldn't get out of prison until
06:51she's 95.
06:52Her sentencing is scheduled for August 28th.
06:54Some of which went to pay for more porn.
06:56All right.
06:58This might be my favorite drop.
07:00I noticed.
07:02It could just go anywhere, man.
07:03Is this one in the John Harris finding out drop?
07:08Those are your two favorites.
07:10Okay, sure.
07:10That one there.
07:11Those are your two favorites.
07:12Maybe that was paid for porn, too.
07:14All right.
07:15I don't know.
07:16So...
07:16I feel bad for old boy.
07:17I really do.
07:18I want to be like, hey, man, I feel like you should be able to catch that one.
07:21But, you know, not everybody is able to catch these things, especially when the heart is
07:27involved, right?
07:27You're like, oh, man.
07:28I found me a nice lady, you know?
07:31I do kind of wonder this.
07:33And I know he was in his 50s, so it wasn't like he was really trying to look for a
07:38sugar
07:38mama.
07:39But I wonder if he thought he had a sugar mama because she had the Harvard education and
07:44all this other stuff.
07:45I wonder if he thought he was getting a sugar mama and come to find out he was the one
07:50getting
07:50scammed.
07:51I think that's certainly a possibility.
07:53I get the same feeling every time I hear one of these stories.
07:56My first is, you can't be that dumb.
07:59And then my second is, but people do stupid things when they think they're in love.
08:03I'm not going to lie.
08:04And apologies if this comes off crass.
08:06Like, I did wonder, like, is he differently abled, so to say?
08:09Like, I have no idea.
08:10Well, differently abled, he thinks he's in love.
08:12Right.
08:12And he got scammed.
08:13It happens all the time.
08:14It seemed like he just got him a nice, good job.
08:16Yeah.
08:16They said it was like a government employee.
08:17Just got him a nice, good job.
08:19Solid pension.
08:20And he just put his trust in the wrong person.
08:22Yeah.
08:22And honestly, who I'm more upset with is her, but not even just for the scamming.
08:28You did not have a good plan for this.
08:29You just went and gambled it?
08:31Yeah.
08:31That's all?
08:32That's it?
08:32Yeah, that's it.
08:33Now, the real question is, is she sitting there on the slots like an old person?
08:37Like that video?
08:38Don't old people be on that video?
08:39Just $400,000 of slots?
08:41Oh, my God.
08:42On the penny slots.
08:43Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap.
08:44You know, you've seen that video.
08:45See there on the slot?
08:49Hey, screw poker.
08:51Screw blackjack.
08:51Yeah.
08:52Let me get on this little penny slot right here.
08:54Yeah.
08:54She rides the little tour bus to, you know, Lake Charles.
08:58Yeah.
08:58She got $100,000.
08:59So maybe she bump it up to the nickel slot.
09:02Yeah.
09:03Just, oh, my goodness, man.
09:05The slots is where we went to, man.
09:07I hope not.
09:07I hope not.
09:08Again, I do not advocate for any scamming.
09:11At the very least, if you had a plan that made sense, I could find some level of small
09:16bits of respect.
09:17Like, I just hate this.
09:18Yeah, nah.
09:19Hey, salute to that guy, man.
09:20Prayer's up to him, man.
09:21Man, that is a lot of money to get got for, man.
09:25Yeah.
09:25In a pretty short span, too.
09:27Like, he must have had a nice little savings.
09:29$400,000?
09:30$400,000 over three years?
09:32Two, three years?
09:33What government worker has that in his back pocket?
09:34God bless.
09:35Oh, now you want to start an investigation.
09:37Yeah.
09:37What have you been doing with the government?
09:39I think it's his fault.
09:40Where did this money come from?
09:41Yeah.
09:41We over here paying for his salary.
09:43Yeah.
09:44Let us find out that she scammed a scammer.
09:46All of a sudden, our allegiances change.
09:47So, now we all scammed because we paying for his salary.
09:50We're paying that $400,000.
09:52Yeah.
09:52That's right.
09:53That's some of my money.
09:54Exactly.
09:55Man, but prayer's up to that dude, man.
09:59This is Miss Tate presented by Sheriff Injury Lawyers on Sports Radio 610.
10:04What are you doing, man?
10:05I haven't did this in a long time.
10:08Me?
10:08No, not you.
10:09Oh, okay.
10:10I was worried for a second.
10:11So, I feel like we've been getting a lot of news from Argentina for some reason.
10:15Remember last week, and Lopez, you was out.
10:17So, talked about a guy who was training a pilot.
10:21I didn't see that.
10:22Uh-huh.
10:22Just go ahead and tell him the story.
10:24I would like to see his response.
10:25So, this happened in Argentina.
10:28Training another pilot, a young woman who was training to be a pilot.
10:33Yeah.
10:33And he decided to just give it to her, and he jumped out.
10:39Ended his life.
10:41Oh, yeah.
10:42Really?
10:42He jumped out with no parachute.
10:43Yep.
10:44He was like, I trust you.
10:45You can land.
10:46And then, yeah, that's what I, when I first.
10:48I threw someone in the pool.
10:48When I first saw it, I thought he was just like, all right, you got it.
10:51And then he was like, jumped out with a parachute.
10:52No, no.
10:53He said he was done.
10:54His last words was, you know what to do.
10:58And it jumped out, no parachute.
10:59Did she land it all right?
11:00Yeah, she did.
11:01Thank goodness.
11:01She did.
11:02Yeah.
11:02Yeah.
11:03Yeah.
11:03But that happened.
11:04Wow.
11:05Yeah.
11:05Wow.
11:06That was crazy.
11:07I'm surprised you didn't see that story, man.
11:08I didn't see that.
11:09Yeah.
11:09But, um, anywho, this happened in Argentina and what are you doing?
11:13I think we need to bring back ass whoopings.
11:15Okay.
11:16On this one.
11:16So, did y'all see in Argentina, it was an attempt to set the Guinness world, uh, record
11:22for the world's largest sandwich.
11:25I did see this one.
11:26Yeah.
11:26So, before the Guinness officials could officially measure it and certify it, hundreds of spectators
11:33rushed past the barriers and began grabbing the pieces of the sandwich.
11:37So, they didn't break the record.
11:40Just because everybody was like, we hungry out here, man.
11:43So, local chefs and volunteers spent hours assimilating this giant sandwich as part of
11:49the community event.
11:51And they never, the officials never verified it.
11:55I have no, I have no sadness for this.
11:57So, so, what we're complaining about is, oh, man, we gave away a whole bunch of food to
12:01people who clearly needed it.
12:03Oh, damn.
12:04Nobody care about that record book?
12:05To me, no, to me, this is like setting up your Legos and somebody just coming, just
12:10knocking it down.
12:10That's why I have a little sadness.
12:12Yeah.
12:13Those people worked hard.
12:14Y'all need your ass beat for that, man.
12:15Yeah, they, they, they, they, they worked hard to make that same way.
12:17See, Reggie was the person that would knock over the puzzle.
12:20But here's the thing, like, it's just like, why would you do that?
12:22You're talking about knocking, when you knock over the Legos or the puzzle,
12:24it's like, you do it for no benefit.
12:27Them people that's grabbing them sandwiches, brother, they're not just throwing them at
12:29people.
12:30They're eating them.
12:31Yeah, but just wait five minutes.
12:32Yeah.
12:33Wait five minutes.
12:34Hold on.
12:34Wait till we measure.
12:35Yeah.
12:36Like, y'all ain't that damn hungry.
12:37They might, could be.
12:39Just hold on 30 seconds, man.
12:41They might, could be out there.
12:42Somebody get a tape measure and then we can eat.
12:45Yeah, we all go eat anyway.
12:46That's right.
12:47Y'all should have had the tape measure man on standby.
12:49By the way, to Reggie's point, and I'm, I'm, I still, I'm pretty, pretty, pretty.
12:53Now go ahead and come over here, man.
12:55Come on.
12:56A bullhorn would have been nice.
12:57Hey, everybody, you're going to get this sandwich.
12:59Just hold on.
12:59You know, I had a microphone and a bullhorn or something.
13:02Yeah, like, this ain't the thing where it's like, y'all ain't about to eat at all.
13:05Yeah.
13:06Like, just hold on.
13:07Let the man measure everything.
13:09Let us get this record.
13:10And then we all eat sandwiches.
13:11If you want the record so bad, do it again.
13:13There are some stupid records in the Guinness Book of World Records.
13:18I've always wanted to.
13:19And maybe, maybe this will be a homework, a homework project for me on a weekend or something.
13:23This is your homework project.
13:24What is the most doable one that we could try?
13:27Oh, God.
13:28Yeah.
13:28You know, like, because there's some stupid things in there.
13:30You know, like, is there one that's, like, not running a mile in, you know, three minutes
13:35or whatever?
13:36What about the, do anybody got the record for talking on the radio the longest?
13:40Oh, there's no way we're getting close to that.
13:42That's got to be days long.
13:43Yeah.
13:43I guarantee you that's days long.
13:45Yeah.
13:45Straight.
13:46Now, I'm wondering, is it 24 hours?
13:50Mm-hmm.
13:5125?
13:53It's somewhere up there.
13:54But there's got to be something that's relatively doable for regular schmoes like us.
13:58Go ahead and do the research project.
14:00I like the idea that John Lopez's research project is, see if I can find a winnable Guinness
14:05Book of World Records.
14:06For sure.
14:06And mine is like, I'm going to pour through data.
14:08Yes.
14:08And see if I can find an anomaly that tells us something about the Houston Texans.
14:14Yeah.
14:14Yeah.
14:14And also, real quick, shout out to Ed Ingram again.
14:17Today is the last day if you want to donate some supplies to Atomic Wings.
14:22Mm-hmm.
14:22And I'm actually going to be picking this stuff up and taking it over to the school.
14:26Oh, that's dope.
14:27Oh, good for you.
14:27Yeah, yeah.
14:28So, yeah, again, shout out to him.
14:31The event is this Saturday.
14:33So, if you ain't doing nothing, go to, I think it's Walltop?
14:38Or Walltrip?
14:39Is that what you're talking about?
14:40Walltrip?
14:40I think it's Walltrip High School.
14:41Yeah.
14:42Yeah.
14:42Is that over in the Heights?
14:43Over there?
14:44It's near there.
14:45Isn't that where Drexler?
14:48Some famous basketball player at U of H went to Walltrip.
14:51I think it might have been Drexler.
14:52It might have been one of those guys.
14:54Yeah, yeah.
14:54So, again, man, if you want to support, man, head over to Atomic Wings off of 290.
14:59Drop off some supplies and you'll get free five boneless wings.
15:03Yeah, it's just off of the North Loop on 34th Street.
15:05Yep, yep, yep.
15:06Mm-hmm.
15:07Yeah.
15:08Somebody, oh, shout out to Champ Slice.
15:09We wouldn't have found it.
15:10The record is 105 hours and eight seconds.
15:12Woo!
15:12On the radio?
15:13Yeah.
15:15105 hours?
15:16Guess who will not be attempting that?
15:17Come on, man.
15:18Do it for the radiothon.
15:19Do it for the food bank, man.
15:20Let's go, man.
15:21If y'all guarantee me that we get a quarter of a million in, I'll do it.
15:24Do it for the kids.
15:25Come on, do it for the kids.
15:26I would.
15:27If we give me y'all down a quarter mil for the city of Houston, I'd do it.
15:31And then the last five minutes, somebody got to come in and just unplug everything.
15:34I mean, if they need some food.
15:36I know who, I found out who went to Waltrip.
15:38The Undertaker.
15:40Oh, did he?
15:41Yeah, graduate of Waltrip High School, as is Keenan McCardell.
15:45Did not realize that we would finish this segment with The Undertaker.
15:48The Undertaker.
15:48The Undertaker.
15:50Yes.
15:50So there you go.
15:51That's another fantastic edition of the mixtape here in the Loop on Sports Radio 610,
15:55120 p.m. every weekday.
15:57If you see anything mixtape worthy, hit our guy up on social media at TheFiggyFig.
16:01He'll shout you out and do all of that good stuff.
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