- 3 hours ago
Celebs Go Dating - Season 15 Episode 14
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Tonight!
00:02It's big and it's smooth and it's all yours.
00:05Lucinda's confidence reaches rock bottom.
00:07There is a part of me that goes,
00:10how could you possibly like me?
00:11Colleen gets an eyeful.
00:13My eyesight's terrible.
00:14How do you see me?
00:16And Gabby reaches a crossroads.
00:19He's great, and I think he will make someone
00:20a really great boyfriend.
00:22He's just not right for me right now.
00:24As our celebs...
00:27Colleen...
00:27Go!
00:28Aren't you the perfect man?
00:30Dating!
00:31That was really good.
00:33But we need to do that in private.
00:35Oh, hello.
00:43Welcome to Celebs Go Dating.
00:45And it's a new day at Agency HQ,
00:48which means a host of nude dating delinquents
00:50for the love legends to get their teeth stuck into.
00:53We have a whole trio of celebrities coming in today.
00:56Oh, yeah.
00:56Oh.
00:57We have lovely, lovely Gabby.
00:59Okay.
01:00Lovely Lucinda.
01:01And James.
01:02And actually, we've got a fourth celebrity.
01:04I'm going to pop over a little bit later on
01:05to see Colleen at Loose Women.
01:07Oh, perfect.
01:07You're under contract at E4, Anna,
01:09so don't get any ideas.
01:15And from a Loose Woman to a Lucinda now,
01:17as first in this morning, prowling the pavement like a panther ready to pounce,
01:21it's down under's finest maths expert, Lucinda Light.
01:26Hello, Celebrity Dating Agency.
01:28Hello, Tom.
01:29It's Lou.
01:30Oh, Miss Light.
01:33Entrez.
01:33Ain't my fault that I'm out here getting loose.
01:37Gotta blame it on the boots.
01:39Gotta blame it on my juice, yeah.
01:42Tom Tom.
01:43Oh, this ensemble.
01:47Lucinda always brings such amazing energy.
01:51I think it's the creative in her.
01:53So I've been scanning her socials,
01:55and it turns out she's something of an artist.
01:59I was obsessed with your drawings.
02:01You like them.
02:02They are amazing.
02:04Can you draw me like one of your French girls?
02:06I'm going to draw your picture.
02:07Oh, my God.
02:07Well, I have things.
02:08Hang on.
02:09Well, I'll do it properly and colour it.
02:10Or you'd like me to just draw a rough one?
02:12Oh.
02:12Yes.
02:13I guess I don't mind about all the bells and whistles.
02:15I don't mind about polish.
02:17Here we go.
02:18Can somebody get Sotheby's on hold, please?
02:21I always start with under eye first,
02:23because your twinkle lingers at the base.
02:26It doesn't linger at the top.
02:28Your twinkle actually twinkles
02:31right around your aura and beyond.
02:34This is you as I see you.
02:38That actually ain't too bad, Tom.
02:40This is mine.
02:43Yeah, I'm going to be honest.
02:44I was expecting better.
02:46And so was Tom by the looks of it.
02:48PHONE RINGS
02:49Oh.
02:50Hello.
02:51Hi, team.
02:52We're ready for Lucinda.
02:53All right, darling.
02:55Mwah.
02:56Oh.
02:57I'm so pleased you're in this chat with Lucinda,
03:00because last time she purged.
03:03We put her back up,
03:04and I'm excited to see how she is today.
03:09Welcome in.
03:11Ah.
03:12Hello.
03:13Hello, you gorgeous ladies.
03:14Hi, darling.
03:16The last time the agent saw Lucinda,
03:18it was an emotional and revealing visit,
03:20as she opened up for the first time about her insecurities.
03:23I've had a bit of body dysmorphia around science,
03:28and it's a continual journey.
03:31She was then sent off on a confidence-boost in three-way
03:34with spiritual anorag and Viking Damien.
03:37So I would like to see you without the makeup on.
03:42I'd like to see you without your clothes on.
03:43That is a better answer.
03:44Which meant anorag got pied,
03:47while Damien got to serve up seconds.
03:49Iamo.
03:50Mmm.
03:52I actually had a bit of a buzz with both the guys.
03:56Anorag, from a more spiritual sense,
03:58we had very similar interests in self-development.
04:03But Damien was quite a vibe.
04:04So we then had dessert together,
04:08and I quite like him.
04:10He's just a cool, adventurous, curious, excited,
04:14and all his possible realm.
04:17My God, he sounds like you.
04:18Yeah.
04:19There's something there.
04:20Okay.
04:21Yeah.
04:22But there is a part of me that goes,
04:25and I hate to say it,
04:27how could you possibly like me?
04:29Is it true?
04:31Could it be?
04:32Are you sure?
04:33And I don't like admitting that.
04:37Oh, Lucinda, I've got chills.
04:41And they're multiplying.
04:42And that's because rocking up outside,
04:45channeling Sandy from Greece,
04:47it's Gabby looking to update the agents
04:49on a most recent date with Joelle,
04:51who fittingly,
04:52ain't long out of high school himself.
04:57Hello, celebrity dating agency.
05:00Hi, Gabby.
05:01Come in.
05:02You're the one that I want.
05:04You're the one that I want.
05:05You're the one that I want.
05:06Ooh, ooh, ooh.
05:07Honey, you're the one that I want.
05:08You're the one that I want.
05:10Ooh, ooh, ooh.
05:14Hello, my darling.
05:16Come in.
05:16Oh, look at you.
05:18Nice to see you.
05:19Oh, I don't really know why.
05:22I love this partially updo.
05:26Glamorous Gabrielle. Positively glowing.
05:28And today she's emitting the splendour of one of Hollywood's most hypnotic sirens.
05:34It's a little bit Monroe-esque. Actually, you're very Monroe-esque,
05:38cos you've got the retrousse nose and the same eye colour.
05:42Careful, Tom. You're one compliment away from her straddling you
05:44while singing happy birthday.
05:46You are just so good for the ego. I love you for it.
05:49This is a good way to calm my central nervous system
05:51before I go into the dragons.
05:53The dragons? Wrong show, Gabs.
05:56Mind you, if you happen to own a dildo company,
05:58I'm sure Dr T would invest.
06:01Back upstairs, after opening up about never feeling good enough,
06:04the agents are keen to unpick Lucinda's sense of self-doubt.
06:08Why do you think that is?
06:09I think it's maybe just being single for a couple of years.
06:13I don't know. I'm not sure.
06:15It might be a little bit of the maths journey.
06:17Like, it was literally a rejection every day, you know,
06:20and sort of trying to relate in a way with a, you know, brick wall sort of vibe.
06:26I've maybe just put up a big wall of protection around my heart.
06:32Lucinda gives off a lot of confidence and it's wonderful.
06:36However, we are starting to really get down to the nitty gritty now
06:39and unpack some of those layers.
06:41She has clearly been hurt in her past.
06:44So let's hope that this date with Damien
06:46will be one step in the right direction
06:48to helping her build some of that inner confidence.
06:51You are hot, you are beautiful, you are very fancied.
06:55Other people can help us, okay, build that self-esteem back.
06:59Yeah.
06:59But we are excited for you because you're going on a second date with Damien.
07:04Yeah.
07:04I want you to lean into the cues he gives you
07:07and if he is showing you affection, if he is being tactile,
07:10if he is complimenting you, really notice how that feels
07:13because something or someone has shaken this at some point in your life.
07:18Grab hold of that beard and get stuck on it, honey.
07:22Get in there, get in there.
07:23Oh my gosh.
07:24Whatever.
07:25I've got to go get some Viking lingo as well.
07:28I'm gorgeous.
07:30What is a Viking lingo?
07:32I don't know.
07:32There doesn't seem to be ancient Norse on my Joolingo app.
07:35Well, I've got to go and find out.
07:37Bye, darling.
07:41You're such a good cheerleader.
07:43Oh, thanks.
07:43Yeah.
07:44You are giving her a lot of these validations.
07:48People that present as having all their shit together
07:51and that they don't need it are the ones that often never get it
07:54and actually do really appreciate being given it.
07:58She's a great woman.
08:01And from one great woman to another now, as Marilyn Monroe reincarnated, heads up to the Dragon's Lair to be
08:07roasted about her latest date with Toy Boy Joelle.
08:10Whilst Anna heads off to see Colleen on set at Loose Women.
08:17Hello.
08:20Gabby's now been on three steamy dates with Toy Boy Joelle.
08:23But despite the undeniable chemistry, not to mention biology, the nine-year age gap keeps biting away at our gabs.
08:30What's on your mind?
08:32We've talked about the age thing before.
08:34That's not feeling that fast. That's living the moment.
08:36I just think it's a time will tell situation.
08:38Wow.
08:40The main thing that we have to, like, say here is he is so sound, so lovely, was very mature,
08:47and I feel like he's got his head screwed on.
08:49But maturity is, like, not only emotional intelligence, but it's, you know, life experience for me.
08:55Because when, what I did notice in our conversations this time is that when we were comparing, kind of, stories
09:02about life experience, you know, still feels very young to me.
09:05Like, he kept talking about uni.
09:06This isn't a him problem. It's, it's me just feeling like I can't relate to him.
09:12Also, like, realistically, financially, maturity.
09:15I just want to know when I do have kids or when I do want to, like, maybe have a
09:19bit of time off that I can be secure to have somebody that supports me.
09:22Did you talk about going on another date?
09:26Yeah, like, I mean, he's messaging me.
09:28Right. And when he messages you, do you message him back?
09:32Like, three days later.
09:34Okay, yeah.
09:35Ooh, I get the feeling Joelle's going to be very disappointed in about three days' time.
09:40You know, he's asking to see me, and I'm kind of just, like, avoiding the questions.
09:43So that right there is the biggest indicator.
09:46Like, he's, he's great, and I think he will make someone a really great boyfriend.
09:50It's just, he's, he's just not right for me right now.
09:54Yeah.
09:55You don't feel comfortable enough to gamble the next few years of your life to see where it goes.
10:01That is literally it.
10:02This is an important admission from Gabby.
10:05She's beginning to understand what she truly wants.
10:07So we're going to park Joelle for now and let her explore other options.
10:11This is exciting.
10:13So, we have someone new for you.
10:15Yes.
10:15Okay.
10:16Someone that we are very excited about.
10:18Gavin.
10:19Gavin.
10:20He's a multi-business owner from Ascot.
10:23Trust Dr. T to shove a random ass into a normal place now.
10:27Gavin looks nice.
10:28Yeah.
10:29I'm just excited to come out with somebody else as well.
10:32Yeah.
10:33What will you be taking from your dates with Joelle into this date with Gavin?
10:39I would like to have a little bit more depth from the get-go.
10:44I think it's great that you've made a definitive decision.
10:47Mm-hmm.
10:47You want to park the Joelle situation.
10:49Mm-hmm.
10:49You're excited about Gavin, right?
10:51Mm-hmm.
10:51Which we like.
10:52Yeah.
10:53And then, you know, the next time we see you, you know where that will be.
10:57Grease the musical?
10:58Mm-hmm.
10:59At the mixer.
11:00Yeah.
11:01Another mixer?
11:02Yeah.
11:02I know.
11:02I can't believe they're letting you into another one either.
11:04Look up!
11:05Because the first time, I'm like...
11:07More boys!
11:08Oh my God!
11:08Yeah!
11:09I was thrown into the walls, but this time I'm like, okay, I'm ready.
11:12Yeah!
11:13But are they?
11:14Is the question.
11:14With some of our celebrities doing better than others, a mixer is the perfect way to test
11:19new and old connections.
11:21Now, for Gabby, of course, Joelle will be there.
11:24So it'll be interesting to see how she shows up given the fact that she just came off a date
11:28with Gavin.
11:29Have fun.
11:30Have so much fun tonight.
11:32I will do.
11:33Bye!
11:33Bye, bye, bye.
11:36You gotta love Gabby.
11:37Yeah.
11:38Gabby's in a good place.
11:39I love how excited she was about Gavin.
11:42Yeah.
11:43I love how excited she is about the mixer.
11:45So this is good.
11:46We're doing our work.
11:47Yeah.
11:47Look at this.
11:48Look at that.
11:48We're winning.
11:49Yeah, all except the actually finding a partner part.
11:52But baby steps, eh, agents?
11:53Baby steps.
11:55Don't let me go.
11:58Today will be forever.
12:01At least one of the agents is doing something useful today, as Anna's about to arrive on
12:05her special errand, proving that when a celebrity's too busy to come to us, we'll go to them.
12:10We're at the stage now with our celebrities where there is no time to waste in finding love.
12:14So I'm going to squeeze in a little consultation with Colleen and find out what exactly went down on her
12:20last date.
12:22No.
12:22No.
12:24Surprise!
12:27Colleen's date with Canadian Adam started well.
12:30And you've never wanted to marry or been close to getting married.
12:33Not really.
12:34Not that much for you to marry me.
12:35I'm just kidding.
12:36Hey, what are you doing later?
12:37But he soon gave her flags as red as the maple leaf.
12:40Have you got kids?
12:41No kids, no.
12:42Did you ever want kids?
12:43It's always nice when you can hand them back.
12:45You know?
12:46You know?
12:47But it's jokes about who should pay the bill.
12:49So are you paying tonight?
12:51I mean, you're the celebrity after all.
12:53Of course.
12:54You're the one rolling in the money.
12:55Left Colleen wanting to split.
12:58Thank you so much.
12:59See you soon.
13:00So, your date with Adam.
13:02So how was that?
13:03Because when we left your last agency session, you seemed really quite excited about him.
13:08Yeah.
13:08You were back on that horse.
13:09You were like, he looks nice.
13:11Give me the tea.
13:12Give me the tea.
13:14Nice face.
13:14Give me the tea.
13:15So it started off really nicely.
13:17It was very, you know, it was flowing.
13:19And then just as we started to go along, there was a few things where I thought, ooh.
13:24But he wouldn't talk about past relationships.
13:26He's never been married.
13:27He's not family orientated.
13:29Doesn't really know what he's doing in a way.
13:32And so it was all lining up and I thought, hmm, this isn't quite working.
13:35But we were still chatting.
13:37And then they brought the bill.
13:40And he said, so what are we doing about this?
13:43But it's just the way he did that straight away and threw me.
13:46And I went, oh, well, we can go halves on it if you want.
13:49And he went, well, you're the celebrity.
13:51The ball's on him.
13:52Although he does have a point.
13:54Ooh.
13:54And then watched me pay it.
13:56And then didn't even say thank you.
13:58Fucking legend.
13:59Okay.
13:59So that was the nail in the coffin for me.
14:01I thought, I don't like you.
14:03Something tells me the next guy that tries that might get a nail in the bellend.
14:17Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating.
14:19We're moseying in for an agency catch up on his date with Dottie.
14:23It's ex-England rugby international beefcake, James Askell.
14:27Does he always walk around with a rugby ball?
14:29That's like me carrying a microphone to the office.
14:32Hello, celebrity dick.
14:33It's James.
14:35Jimmy.
14:45Come in.
14:48Hello.
14:49Chicon Marine Bleu.
14:51A vision in bloom.
14:52Oh, yeah.
14:53I have a gift for you.
14:54Here we go.
14:54Some classic ball innuendo incoming.
14:56Oh, I see.
14:58It's big and it's smooth and it's all yours.
15:00Isn't it beautiful?
15:02Does Tom think it's a Fabergé egg?
15:05Gosh, what a privilege it is to nuzzle my nostrils into one of James's leathery balls.
15:10The smell of the scrum still lingers on it like morning dew on an Etonian grubber.
15:17We simply must get it signed.
15:18Shall I toss it?
15:20Yes, please do.
15:21What delicate tossing.
15:22Was that alright?
15:23That was perfect tossing.
15:24Oh, my.
15:25I can't believe you actually trained with that ball.
15:26I did, yeah.
15:27In those days when you used to wrestle with a hooker before nine o'clock.
15:31Yes, yes.
15:32Or a quiet Tuesday night.
15:34There was nothing quiet about that night, Haskell.
15:36And you still owe 100 quid, big man.
15:38I put to sexy Tom always yours, James Haskell.
15:41And a kiss.
15:42You not going to smell it again, Tom?
15:47Back over at LWHQ, Anna's got a surprise in store for Loose Lady Colleen.
15:52Well, the dating does continue.
15:55I know.
15:55Even though you are a busy bee.
15:57I'm going to leave it completely blind for you, because we do have a gentleman ready
16:01and waiting.
16:02Oh, I'm going now.
16:03You are going?
16:03I'm going dating today.
16:04Yeah.
16:04Brilliant.
16:05Give her a break, Anna.
16:06She's just spent the morning hearing about Janet Street Porter's sex life.
16:09Colleen has this tendency to pre-judge any of her suitors against this checklist.
16:14And the problem with this, it puts her in a negative mindset before she's even gone
16:17in on the date.
16:18So, a blind date is perfect.
16:21It keeps the slate clean and it gives everybody a fighting chance from the off.
16:25How do you feel about that?
16:26That makes me nervous, obviously not knowing anything.
16:30I mean, I could end up sitting at someone's table that I think is my date and it's not.
16:34How about it?
16:34Here's a tip.
16:35Sit at the table the cameras are pointing at.
16:37I'm manifesting out there.
16:39Colleen's going to come in.
16:40She's going to be beaming.
16:42She's going to be literally titty tassels.
16:45Off we go.
16:46Hand about to the rest of the loose women.
16:47Why not?
16:48Not Judy Love though.
16:49She's got enough pairs of her own.
16:52Back at the agency and part man, part subwoofer James is on his way to filling the agents
16:58about his much anticipated latest date.
17:01James and Dottie.
17:02Yes.
17:03Yes.
17:04What do you think?
17:05Seeing their potential compatibility like this could be it.
17:10This could be it.
17:10Yes.
17:11Come on in.
17:12That was a soft nod.
17:14Yeah.
17:14Hello.
17:15That was very gentle.
17:16How you doing?
17:17Gentle giant James had a peach of a date with Hottie Dottie.
17:21Despite a wobbly start.
17:23There's a couple of people that I think we've got in common.
17:26Oh God.
17:27They didn't bring in the best life.
17:28Did they not?
17:29And rather taken by Dottie's digs.
17:31She's not down with the kids here.
17:32Yeah.
17:33Also don't say get down with.
17:37Spending time with you is such a confidence boost.
17:38He was potty about Dottie.
17:40If you do want to do it again, I'd definitely do it again.
17:42I would like to see you again, yes.
17:44Perfect.
17:46How was the date with Dottie?
17:47Great.
17:48Really, really good.
17:49Really nice girl.
17:50Very different energy to everyone else that I dated.
17:53How so?
17:54What does that mean?
17:56Intelligence, confidence.
17:58She didn't take any shit from me.
18:00She mugged me off a couple of times.
18:02Very funny.
18:04All the other dates I had, they were all so nice.
18:06And they were all really interesting dates and fun.
18:10But there probably wasn't that initial, like after five minutes,
18:13okay, I want to do it again.
18:14And I had that with Dottie.
18:16Well, actually, before we go to feedback,
18:18how would you rate the date from one to ten?
18:22Eight and a half, nine.
18:23I don't think it could have got better really.
18:24Ten springs to mind.
18:25All right.
18:26So do you think you're a good match with James?
18:29And she said a good match for each other.
18:33There was a lot in common, similar passions and fitness,
18:36music, life, and ambition.
18:39Oh.
18:40Wow.
18:41She said,
18:42He was less brash than I was expecting him to be.
18:46He showed a softer side,
18:48and he brought vulnerability to the conversation.
18:52James, aren't you the perfect man?
18:55You are a skillful dater.
18:58Yeah.
18:59That tells it all.
19:00The perfect man?
19:02This under-promise and over-deliver thing really works.
19:04I wanna feel like I'm alive.
19:08So let's just keep on dancing like it's 2005.
19:12Let's hope it also applies to low expectations too,
19:15as Colleen's arriving for her blind date with Michael.
19:23I'm quite nervous because I've never done a completely blind date.
19:28No one has told me anything about him.
19:30Then in another way, it's quite good because I've no preconceived ideas.
19:34I'm going in quite excited actually.
19:37Right, let's have a look at him then.
19:42What I'm looking for in a partner would be somebody who is fun, lively, kind, compassionate, energetic.
19:50Good fun to be with.
19:51He seems like a nice chap. No red flags yet.
19:54So, I've been playing guitar for some time.
19:56Oh, bollocks, here's one. He's got it on his back.
19:58Should the occasion arise, it would be a pleasure to sing to her some words.
20:03He knows it's a date and not an audition, right?
20:05Oh, thank you so much.
20:07My pleasure, madam.
20:12Oh, that's very fresh.
20:13Not as fresh as the bar's open mics about to spit.
20:16Hello.
20:17I'm Colleen.
20:18Nice to meet you.
20:20Hey, genuinely pleased to meet you.
20:21Oh, good to meet you.
20:23Yeah, at last.
20:25Oh, hello.
20:26Yes.
20:27I'd never go anywhere without it.
20:28Really?
20:29Must be a nightmare having a shit on a plane.
20:32Oh, how lovely.
20:33I don't even know your name.
20:35Michael.
20:36Michael.
20:37Michael Patrick.
20:38Irish.
20:39Dun Gannon.
20:40Oh, wow.
20:41But were you born here?
20:42I was actually born in Singapore.
20:44Oh, God.
20:46My father was in the Air Force.
20:48I've been living where I am now for about 20 years.
20:50Where's that?
20:50Near Stonehenge.
20:51Yeah, yeah.
20:52Closest landmark.
20:52Yeah.
20:53Can't understand why they chose to build Stonehenge beside a main road.
20:57It's a joke, Colleen.
20:59A bad joke.
21:015,000 years ago.
21:03There we go.
21:04This could be a long afternoon.
21:07So Wiltshire, yeah?
21:08That's miles away from me.
21:11Okay, so he's not tall, he's not dark.
21:14He lives in Wiltshire, miles away, and he's turned up with a guitar.
21:20So I live in Staffordshire.
21:22Okay.
21:22It's a beautiful countryside.
21:24Yeah.
21:24I'm just a homebody, really.
21:28Okay, then.
21:29Anyone up for a sing song?
21:37Back at the agency, Ed Chaser James is still reveling in the positive feedback he just received
21:42from his first date with Dottie.
21:44So clearly, she wants to go on another date.
21:48I hope so.
21:49But that being said, we've got a mixer coming up.
21:51What, another one?
21:52Yeah.
21:53Another mixer coming up.
21:54We're full of surprises, James.
21:56Yes.
21:56Oh, God.
21:58Do I have to do the mixer?
21:59Because I'd like to go on another date with her without having to do the mixer.
22:01Because also my homework, I'm top of the class, surely.
22:04It's totally up to you.
22:05But yeah, if you want to go on another date with Dottie.
22:07I'd prefer to do that if I'm honest with you.
22:09Yes.
22:10This is really good to see.
22:11Yeah.
22:12That was a great first date.
22:14Yeah.
22:15And it seems like the second date could potentially be even more amazing.
22:18Yeah.
22:18Yeah, I hope so.
22:19It was great to see you.
22:22Yeah.
22:22I appreciate it.
22:23See you later.
22:24Bye-bye.
22:26He's so lovely.
22:27He is.
22:28He's quite a golden retriever.
22:29Yeah, he is.
22:30Look at the feedback.
22:31Yeah.
22:31Very glowing.
22:32He did basically play fetch for a living.
22:34But if he could lick his own balls too, he'd have never left the house.
22:40Over on her blind date, Colleen's attempting to see past yet another self-imposed red flag
22:44with Wiltshire's very own Willie Nelson Mike.
22:47He may live hundreds of miles away, Colleen, but the man's brought a guitar to a date.
22:53Who would be your idol partner or celebrity crush?
22:57Who's my celebrity crush?
23:00Apart from Colleen Nolan.
23:02Well played, Mike.
23:04Um, Shakira.
23:07Great shout, but what are you doing with your finger?
23:09Oh really?
23:10She's gorgeous.
23:11I nearly met George Clooney actually.
23:13Nearly meeting him means you didn't.
23:15Come on Colleen, cut the poor fella some slack.
23:17He's travelled all the way from Stonehenge.
23:19See, that's the truth though.
23:21I shouldn't have even mentioned it.
23:23Yeah, you were trying to make me go, oh my God, you met George Clooney, but actually
23:26you didn't.
23:28He's dressed very smart, but it's not my usual type and he lives so far away and I can't
23:34be arsed.
23:34Bloody hell, Colleen.
23:36Guy Ritchie?
23:36Yeah, he's not on my list.
23:37Who is?
23:38If she says Roy Walker, you're in.
23:40It's like George Clooney, Channing Tatum, all them lot are pretty spectacular.
23:47Yeah.
23:48Come on Mike, you're going to need to up your game here.
23:51You actually have got amazing eyes.
23:54Two of them.
23:55Say what you see Mike, say what you see.
23:57That was Roy Walker for anyone under 56.
24:12Welcome back to So Let's Go Dating, where Colleen's been dreaming of a Channing Tatum type,
24:16but so far hasn't seen the magic in Mike.
24:19Do you want to come to Lourdes in the summer?
24:20I mean, we're on Lourdes.
24:21We have a trip for each other.
24:23Do you?
24:23My mum used to go to Lourdes every year.
24:25No.
24:26Yeah, she used to go as a handmaiden, you know, to help her.
24:29So are you religious?
24:30Yes.
24:31Right.
24:32Are you?
24:34Really religious?
24:35Well, he's hardly going to go on a pilgrimage to France if he's on the fence.
24:38Totally committed.
24:39He's a Christian.
24:39You're quite laid back really, aren't you?
24:42Here's the thing, that I also am shy.
24:46Probably grew up introverted.
24:48Oh really?
24:49So I don't know if the humour in that is a disguise.
24:53I do love being funny.
24:55I like to make people laugh.
24:56I like people to enjoy themselves and have a laugh.
24:59Well, feel free to make me laugh whenever you want.
25:01Meow, have that.
25:04Oh no, I think you've broken him.
25:06He's super religious and I'm really not.
25:10So I might have just killed this on the spot.
25:13Could things get any worse?
25:16I would love to sing a song.
25:18Yes, yes they could.
25:19But it's a big deal for me.
25:21Well don't do it.
25:23Really Mike, please don't.
25:24I will sing the words quietly over the table.
25:29No, you've got to be like really quiet.
25:32But like don't stand up and be bloody Elvis in the middle of the restaurant.
25:37Because I will die.
25:38Hey girl from the Emerald Isles.
25:43A precious gem amongst the stones.
25:50Liquid eyes, radiant eyes.
25:53Liquid eyes?
25:54A treasured find to all who are wise.
25:59Love.
26:02Love.
26:03Loves you.
26:07Love.
26:10Loves you.
26:17Colleen.
26:19Well fuck me, it's only got to work.
26:21That is so nice.
26:24So beautiful.
26:25Colleen.
26:29I haven't seen a comeback like this since.
26:31Christ.
26:32I don't know, he was a pretty big one.
26:33But this is no less miraculous.
26:39Across town, finally fed up with the toy boys.
26:42Gabby's on the lookout for a bit of life experience and financial security
26:45on a first date with entrepreneur Gavin from Asgard.
26:49I'm excited for my date tonight with Gavin.
26:52I know that Gavin is substantially older than my previous date.
26:55He's 36.
26:57He's nice and tall.
26:58Six foot one.
26:58And he seems to be a successful business owner apparently.
27:01So we're interested to know about more of that.
27:03I bet you do.
27:04Ka-ching.
27:05I don't know much about Gabby.
27:06So I'm keen to sit down and find out a bit more about her.
27:09I've been single for five years now.
27:11I think it's about time I met somebody worth my while.
27:14My pretty melody and save that time for me.
27:21Hi, how are you?
27:22Nice to meet you.
27:23Nice to meet you.
27:23Nice to meet you.
27:24Gav.
27:24Nice to meet you.
27:24Gav.
27:25Can you meet you soon?
27:26Oh, thank you so much.
27:27Nicely done Gavlar.
27:28This ain't his first rodeo.
27:30How are you?
27:31I'm good, thank you.
27:32How are you?
27:32I'm very well, darling.
27:33Yes, thank you.
27:36Thanks so much.
27:37You look fabulous by the way.
27:39The gorge.
27:39Are you excited to be here?
27:41I am, yeah.
27:42You said that on your...
27:43I saw your little brief bio thing today.
27:45Oh, did you see it today?
27:46One of the main things for me is where people are at in their lives and like the life experience
27:52and what they do.
27:54Yeah, that's what I mean.
27:54I've got four businesses, so I'm like...
27:56What are they?
27:57She ain't messing about.
27:58We're going to need the full LinkedIn bios, please.
28:00So I've got one's a tree surgery company.
28:02Okay.
28:02So I started up a landscaping company doing like landscaping.
28:05Oh, my garden needs doing.
28:06Yeah?
28:07Yeah.
28:07I do now want to start up a fragrance company.
28:09I want to do something like aftershaves and perfumes and things.
28:12That's cool.
28:13Yeah, I was a bit of a naughty boy in school, so I had to sort of work for myself
28:19and do
28:19my own things.
28:20I've got no GCSEs or...
28:21Okay, but you don't need them.
28:22Nah.
28:23Look at you.
28:23You've got four businesses.
28:24It doesn't matter.
28:25He's self-made.
28:27He's got really great values.
28:29He's clearly got his shit together and I do find that attractive.
28:33What are you like in a relationship?
28:34Jesus, should we ask him to do a swab test next?
28:38Supportive.
28:39Fun.
28:40I'm very much...
28:41I love to be a provider.
28:43Do you know what I mean?
28:43It's my job as a man, I look at it, is to provide, to make sure you're alright.
28:48Do you know what I mean?
28:48Mm-hmm.
28:49Smoothly done.
28:50Keep this up and Gabby will be having you sorting out her back garden in no time.
29:00Meanwhile, across town, Lucinda's branching into new territory on a second date at an axe-throwing
29:05bowl with real-life Viking Damien, who also owns an axe arena.
29:09She might as well be going bowling with the Big Lebowski.
29:11Do you know what I'm really excited to see Damien?
29:13The Viking.
29:14There was a little bit of a vibe last time, a bit of chemistry, and I just want to sort
29:20of explore that a bit more.
29:22I'm looking forward to more time, some more chat, and we're doing some axe-throwing,
29:25which is my thing, so I'm hoping I can impress and I hope we're going to have a great time.
29:28This is my time now and I'm really hoping we're going to have an even better date this time around.
29:34Yay!
29:35Hello.
29:36Hi.
29:37How are you?
29:38How are you?
29:39I'm excited.
29:39Good too.
29:40I'm nervous, how are you?
29:41I'm a bit nervous too.
29:43Excited, nervous?
29:44You're going to be really good at this and kick my butt.
29:46Would you like that or would you like me to give you a chance?
29:48I want you to kick my butt.
29:50Crikey!
29:50No small talk, straight into the role play.
29:53Lucinda means business.
29:54That's my touchy-feely.
29:55I love it.
29:56Hot diggity damn, Damo.
29:58You're looking hot tonight.
29:59And there's something really sexy about a guy taking charge that really knows what they're doing.
30:05You can teach me how to act through.
30:10So much pressure, but I got one in.
30:12That is a bit sexy that you've got a bullseye straight up.
30:17This is all you need is a bit of practice. Here we go.
30:21Oh no, I'm about to take down the building.
30:23I don't think you'd have any complaints from Damo. He owns the competition.
30:26Keep going, keep going. No one's keeping score.
30:29Come on, Luc. You can do this.
30:33Alright, stand back. Let ZZ Chop show you how it's done.
30:40Oh!
30:41Straight in the sweet spot.
30:42Right, I think this is the last throw. I believe in you.
30:45Come on.
30:47Do exactly what you did last time.
30:49Yeah, it was quite casual.
30:50Further up.
30:51That's it.
30:54Absolute silence from the crowd.
30:55Oh, she's gone two-handed.
30:56If she misses this, we can say goodbye to the deposit.
30:59Yes!
31:00We've done it.
31:01Love it.
31:02Feels good, right?
31:02I done.
31:03Does it feel good?
31:04Ooh.
31:04Damo's just glad to still have his head attached to his shoulders.
31:07Either way, Lucinda seems to be liking her Viking.
31:13Back at the classier end of town with Colleen's blind date looking dead and buried.
31:17Her cut price fully busted out the sixth string and is putting right back in the game.
31:23So what are you looking for?
31:25I would love to find somebody to spend the rest of my life with.
31:31A companion to be happy with.
31:33Just that one.
31:34The one that at the end of the day, if you're having a bad day or even a good day,
31:38you go home and you just get a hug off them and think,
31:41ah, it's all.
31:42And they go, it's going to be fine.
31:44Yeah, yeah.
31:44We're together.
31:45My only red flag is just the distance.
31:48I was in Stoke to Wiltshire, yeah.
31:50Ah.
31:51It doesn't bother me.
31:52And for me as well, it's like that special person.
31:54Even if they're not physically, they're there.
31:57They're there, yeah.
31:57They're at the end of the phone or whatever.
32:02I really would love to see you again and get to know that, honest to God,
32:05but you don't know whether I'm being serious.
32:10So try this one on for size.
32:13God, not another song, Mike.
32:14Quit whilst you're ahead.
32:15In a different sort of a way.
32:17Oh, there you are.
32:19Oh, for fuck's sake.
32:21I bet they love him at a prayer group.
32:22My eyesight's terrible.
32:24Would you...
32:28Oh, my God.
32:29Would you see me again?
32:31How do you see me?
32:32I'm not answering those stupid things on.
32:37Let me try them on.
32:38Oh, I was so hoping you would say that.
32:43I like the fact that they blink.
32:45Yes.
32:47Never mind liquid eyes, they look radioactive.
32:50Do you see me?
32:51They suit you.
32:53They actually do.
32:54They're genius.
32:55I've never seen any like that before.
32:56They're great, aren't they?
32:56I mean, how can I resist?
32:57So on paper, Mike isn't normally the type I would go for, but he's really unique and so entertaining.
33:05And yes, he lives far away, but it's really hard not to like him.
33:11Yes, Killeen, she's changed her tune.
33:13Oh, shit.
33:14Moment of truth.
33:15Here comes the bill.
33:16Sink or swim, Mikey?
33:17Oh, yeah.
33:19I think I'll get a clicky thing.
33:20Is everything all right?
33:21It was perfect.
33:22No, no, I've got it, but let me...
33:26Are you sure?
33:26Yes.
33:27Go on, Mike.
33:28He's picking up the whole tab.
33:29And he's up to date with his tech.
33:31This guy's getting more of a catch by the second.
33:33Trust me, we're going in.
33:35This might take a while.
33:36It's all good.
33:39Wonderful service.
33:40It's a restaurant, Mike, not a Holy Communion.
33:42Well, I've had a lovely, lovely afternoon.
33:44Thank you very much.
33:45Same.
33:46Fantastic.
33:46Really enjoyed it.
33:49And hopefully we'll get to meet again.
33:51Yes, I would love to see you again, definitely.
33:53Yeah, definitely.
33:55Definitely.
33:55Definitely.
33:56Yes, please.
34:01Oh, okay.
34:03You know you did it.
34:04That's what you did.
34:05Yeah, yeah, yeah.
34:05Would you let me stay, could we get away?
34:09You were taking my heart.
34:11I've started off thinking, oh, this is going to be a disaster again,
34:14to thinking, I've really enjoyed myself.
34:17And there's just something about him that I really like.
34:20Bring the glasses next time.
34:21Yeah.
34:22They're the thing that drew me in.
34:24And then to end the day, we paid the bloody bill.
34:28Woo-hoo.
34:29Bye.
34:31It was fantastic.
34:32Wonderful lady.
34:33Fantastic occasion.
34:34I would absolutely love to see Colleen again any time.
34:37And I got a kiss at the end, a cheeky little kiss.
34:41I'm walking away with a little spark in my stomach.
34:47Well, as long as it's not a dodgy chicken al forno,
34:50we have got a result for Colleen.
34:54Meanwhile, back over with Gab.
34:56So far, things seem to be heading in a positive direction
34:59with tree trimming tycoon Gavin.
35:01Great.
35:03Yeah, I might have to bang me glasses on in a minute.
35:05Shit, he's not got a pair of goggly eyes and all, has he?
35:08Yeah.
35:08Oh, my God.
35:09Oh, man.
35:09Are you long-sighted, short-sighted?
35:11I can see you.
35:12Oh, that's good.
35:13Yeah, thanks luck.
35:14You ready?
35:20That bad?
35:20They look good.
35:22Let's see.
35:23No, no, don't make me feel silly.
35:26Yeah, they don't even have strings that make them blink.
35:28You must feel like a right plonker, mate.
35:30Gavin ticks a lot of boxes.
35:32I just don't have the same initial attraction like I had with Joelle.
35:34However, the maturity levels are there.
35:37It's the first proper adult date that I've had.
35:41And I'm enjoying it.
35:43What's your favourite cuisine?
35:44I would say Italian.
35:47Pasta.
35:48Yeah, Italian or like steak.
35:50I love pasta as well.
35:52I just can't eat a lot of it because I just balloon sticks to me.
35:55Chicken.
35:56It's not good for me.
35:58Really?
35:59Yeah.
36:00I try not to eat it.
36:02Blimey, this is a grown-up date.
36:03Next, they'll be sharing tips on heartburn and acid reflux.
36:11Back at the all-action date, and with Damo proving to Lucinda he can handle his tool,
36:15they've decided to axe the axe throwing in favour of a more casual drinker than the nearest boozer.
36:25You've got so many strings to your bow, if you like, you know, all the different things that you do.
36:31Celebrant speaker, reality star show, you know, dating guru, dating host, all these things.
36:37Yeah, alright mate, we all know how to use Wikipedia.
36:39But what just had to be one thing or the one thing, what is that?
36:42Just to love.
36:43Just to love?
36:44Yeah.
36:45I think I'm just, I'm just a big lover.
36:48I just want to love.
36:49I think life is so much more fun with two.
36:53I mean, I think I say yes to all the adventures because, obviously, I'm a bit single.
36:58I'm, you know, kind of...
36:59A bit of single?
36:59A bit of single or a lot of single?
37:01A little bit.
37:02A little bit of single.
37:02No, that is fair.
37:04This is feeling good.
37:05The chat's easy.
37:06I like his vibe.
37:08There's something there.
37:09I just need to figure out if Damo's into me.
37:12What are you looking for in a woman?
37:14What's your vibe?
37:15What am I looking for in a woman?
37:17Yeah, what's your ideal cheeky babe?
37:20Me.
37:21Mmm.
37:22Everything that you are.
37:24No.
37:24Me.
37:24And a woman.
37:26Me and a woman.
37:27Come on, Luce.
37:28He's talking about his willy.
37:30What do you mean?
37:31Me.
37:32What do I see in you?
37:34Me.
37:34Nothing like having to explain a joke three times to kill your boner, eh, Damo?
37:39It's over your head, don't you, honey?
37:41It must have a big one if it's gone over our head.
37:52I want to see if you can dance, yeah.
37:56Cause I just love the feeling.
37:59Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating where Gabs is out exploring uncharted waters.
38:03She's on a date with a man who is older than she is.
38:08Have you been in any other long-term relationships before?
38:10Yeah, so I was in an 11-year relationship.
38:1311 years?
38:14Yeah.
38:14Oh my God.
38:15Erm, got her, so I've got three kids.
38:18You have?
38:19Yeah.
38:19Whatever you do, don't spit your food out.
38:21Yeah, I've got three kids, that's why I was with her, 11 years.
38:23Okay.
38:24This is very forward.
38:26Forward, do you want more kids?
38:28Bloody hell, don't hold back Gabs.
38:34Yeah, I've always said I'd be open to more.
38:36Oh really?
38:36Yeah.
38:38Gavin's got three kids and that's kind of thrown me a little bit, but he is open to having
38:42more.
38:42On paper is everything that I think that I want, but I just don't know.
38:46I think the fact that you've been in a very long-term relationship is a good green flag
38:51because it means that you've got three kids with someone that you've been with for 11
38:54years and that's a huge commitment anyway.
38:56Like now when I've been dating, I've been very much led by sexual chemistry because people
39:03are hot.
39:04So having these kind of conversations, it gives you that, I already thought you were attractive,
39:08but then having the opportunity to get to know you, I'm like, okay, yeah, this is
39:11good.
39:11Yeah.
39:12You know?
39:12Yeah.
39:12And then with like maturity level, you know what I mean?
39:14Yeah.
39:14And yeah, you've got, I feel like you're very interesting and you've got a lot, I feel
39:20like you've just got a lot of experience.
39:21Yeah.
39:22With life.
39:22Yeah.
39:23Yeah.
39:29Meanwhile, back at the boozer, Lucinda needs to tap into something special.
39:33Issues to avoid the chat with Axeman Damo drying up.
39:39Can you enjoy your English beer?
39:41Yeah.
39:41You know, it's all right.
39:42I haven't had a beer for a long time, but I just thought, you know, when in Rome.
39:47What's she looking around for?
39:48The Trevi Fountain?
39:49I do plan to go to Rome this year actually.
39:51Do you?
39:52Do you know my parents were married in Rome?
39:54Really?
39:54They were married at the Vatican.
39:56If I did know that, would that be weird?
39:58Yeah.
39:58Yeah.
39:59Just a little bit.
40:06Shot of Limoncello, anyone?
40:10It feels like it's flat-lined a bit and, you know, when we get to these moments, I do
40:15wonder if it's me.
40:17I know I am a bit of an acquired taste.
40:19I'm going to really have to pull one out of the hat here.
40:23Should we play a game?
40:24Yes.
40:25What do you want to play?
40:27What would be a fun game?
40:29Mousetrap?
40:30Boggle?
40:31Buckaroo?
40:32It's an eye-gazing.
40:35Am I being therapised?
40:37No.
40:37Very pleased.
40:38OK.
40:38It's just an eye-gazing.
40:40It's called Transfiguration.
40:42Tantra.
40:43Hello.
40:44Straight out the Kama Sutra.
40:45And no talking.
40:46What are you doing now?
40:47I just talked.
40:49What?
40:50Is that it?
40:50They've just got to stare at each other?
40:52Sod this, I'm going for a piss then.
41:02Jesus, are they still going?
41:04If they've gone full Tantra, we could be here for hours.
41:08Best leave them to it and see how our Gabs is getting on
41:11with garden mower mogul Gavin.
41:13Seemingly the mature man she's after, but so far
41:16he's yet to cultivate any chemistry.
41:18Am I your type?
41:21Very much.
41:22I love your eyes.
41:23I'm big on eyes and a smile.
41:25And again, it's your personality that attracts me more.
41:30This is good, mate.
41:31Keep laying down that groundwork.
41:33Visual, you're like, yes.
41:35You're into the gym.
41:36You've got lovely teeth, lovely smile.
41:38Keep them coming, you green-fingered Romeo.
41:41You're career-driven.
41:42That initial attraction is eyes.
41:45I'm very attracted to you.
41:47Mentally, visually.
41:49Mentally?
41:53What's the matter, Gabs?
41:54Don't fancy returning the compliment?
41:58I've tried to find a spark with Gavin,
42:00but when he says how much he likes me,
42:03I've realised that I just don't feel the same.
42:05So I'm going to have to find an excuse and call it a night.
42:09I'm so tired.
42:11Brutal.
42:12But at his age, I'm sure he'll understand.
42:14The great Pottery Throwdown's about to start anyway.
42:17Thank you so much for dinner.
42:18You're welcome, babes.
42:19Hopefully we get a date too.
42:21How's she going to get out of this one?
42:22I can't even believe where the time's gone, to be honest.
42:26Answer an entirely different question.
42:28Crafty.
42:29Well, let's go.
42:31I love the conversation with Gavin tonight, but I don't know if there's a spark there.
42:36Yeah, the yawn in the face would indicate there wasn't.
42:39And I don't know if I have time to lose here, to go on a second date.
42:43You don't have time.
42:44This bloke's got four businesses to run and three kids.
42:47Did you have a nice time?
42:48I had a lovely time. Did you?
42:49Yeah, I did. It was so nice to meet you.
42:50I feel like you're such a nice person.
42:53And I feel the same with you. I feel like we're very compatible.
42:56Yeah, it was lovely to meet you.
42:57You too. I'm looking forward.
42:59Go on.
43:00See you again on date two.
43:02See you soon, babe.
43:03Somehow she's managed to dodge it again.
43:05See you soon.
43:06Bye now. Bye, bye, bye.
43:08Yeah, I had a really good time. I really enjoyed it.
43:11Walking out with massive smile on me face.
43:14I feel like he would be a good partner.
43:17However, it's lacking the chemistry that I had with Joelle.
43:20I wish I could just blend them both together.
43:23Hang on, let me just chuck that into chat GPT.
43:25We want a sexy beefcake gardener.
43:28Er, it's giving me Charlie Dimmock.
43:36Time to head back to the pub to see if Lucinda and Damo's tantric stare-off
43:40has conjured up any chemistry for our confidence boost needing Ozzy.
43:45Bloody hell, they're still going.
43:47Hmm.
43:48Could have gone for a dump as well.
43:49Oh, my gosh.
43:53Their eyes will look like Colleen's date's glasses in a minute.
44:03I'm going to have to stop that a minute.
44:04Oh, God.
44:05I think you've blown it, Lucinda.
44:06Yeah.
44:08That was really good.
44:09But we need to do that in private.
44:11Hmm.
44:12Or has she?
44:13It's too new distractions.
44:15I know.
44:18Hello.
44:19The Vikings going in for a pillage.
44:22The Vikings going in for a pillage.
44:22And just kiss me.
44:24There's nothing left of us.
44:27This could be the start of something.
44:31I, I, I'm falling for you.
44:36Falling for you.
44:38Come on, let's go.
44:40Come on, let's go.
44:40All right.
44:40Let's go.
44:42He's quite a divine kisser.
44:44He's quite delicious.
44:46I think he's delightful.
44:47I love his smiling eyes and he's just quite multi-dimensional.
44:52There's some little embers flicking again.
44:55Oh.
44:56Right.
44:57What a lovely night.
44:59Yes.
45:00I think we say goodbye now, right?
45:06It has gone really well.
45:08I've shown her I can chuck an axe and I can move my mouth, as it were.
45:12Viking checklist complete.
45:14Just got to set fire to the pub now.
45:16Yeah, I'm hoping there'll be another day and, um, yeah.
45:19And we'll see where it goes from there.
45:20Hmm.
45:21Hmm.
45:25Aww.
45:27Until next time.
45:30As I'm going on this dating journey, I am giving myself permission to feel again
45:35and be close to the dating game again.
45:40And I enjoyed it.
45:42Ah, good on you, Luce.
45:43The agents will be proud.
45:44I feel like I swear.
45:45No.
45:46You hang on.
45:47No, you hang on.
45:48No, you hang on.
45:49No, you hang on.
45:50If this is a tantric goodbye, then we better check the Uber drivers brought his PJs.
45:59Tomorrow night, it's the return of the mixer.
46:02Or as Anna likes to call it.
46:03A stick, sir.
46:04A stick, sir.
46:06A stick, sir.
46:06A stick, sir.
46:06But not before she gives ladies man PK a right royal bollocking.
46:11Don't be a fuckboy.
46:12Or a big decision.
46:12And a big decision proves too much for Gabby.
46:14I'm going to go to the bathroom.
46:16I'm going to go to the bathroom.
46:16I'm going to go to the bathroom.
46:17I'm going to go to the bathroom.
46:17As our celebs.
46:19Abracadabra, what is this?
46:20He just said abracadabra, I'm obsessed with it.
46:22Joe.
46:23Is there anybody gay here?
46:26Dating!
46:26I'm in love!
46:53I'm in love!
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