- 2 days ago
Part 4 of 9 of the period drama. Having fled the Punch and Judy show in panic, Nell and her grandfather encounter a gypsy caravan, where Mrs Jarley resides. Taken by the girl's kindness to her grandfather, Mrs Jarley offers her a job at her waxwork museum and a place to stay. Meanwhile Quilp, having persuaded Solomon Brass to give Dick Swiveller a job in his legal firm, asks him to teach him about legal matters in his office as he sets out to find Nell and her grandfather for himself.
Starring Natalie Ogle, Sebastian Shaw, Trevor Peacock, Granville Saxton, Christopher Fairbank, Colin Jeavons, Freda Dowie, Margaret Courtenay, James Marcus, Peter Bland, Pauline Letts, John Kearney, Hal Jeayes, Syuart Latham and Jimmy Gardner.
Starring Natalie Ogle, Sebastian Shaw, Trevor Peacock, Granville Saxton, Christopher Fairbank, Colin Jeavons, Freda Dowie, Margaret Courtenay, James Marcus, Peter Bland, Pauline Letts, John Kearney, Hal Jeayes, Syuart Latham and Jimmy Gardner.
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TVTranscript
00:11PIANO PLAYS
00:30Come here, child.
00:40Leave her be, Nell.
00:51I've seen you somewhere before. A miserably wet you look too.
00:55You'd better come in and take shelter with me.
00:58Thank you, Mum.
01:01And the old gentleman too, if he's so minded.
01:05Come along.
01:17Come in, come in, old gentleman.
01:19Come in, child.
01:21I'll soon have you warm and dry.
01:24There.
01:25Take a seat.
01:26Give me your hat and a man there.
01:28Okay, child.
01:29Off with it.
01:30There.
01:31Off with it.
01:32That's it.
01:33My word.
01:36Ah!
01:37Now it comes back to me.
01:40Who won the helter-skelter plate, child?
01:42Won what, Mum?
01:43The racist child the helter-skelter plate run for on the second day.
01:47Second day, Mum?
01:49Second day.
01:50Second day.
01:51Can't you tell me who won the helter-skelter plate when I ask a question civilly?
01:54I don't know.
01:55You don't know?
01:56You don't know?
01:57But you was there.
01:58I saw you with my own eyes.
02:00And sorry I was to see you in the company of a punch.
02:05No vulgar reps that people should scorn to talk to.
02:08I wasn't there by choice.
02:10We didn't quite know our way and the two men kindly let us travel with them.
02:14Do you...do you know them, Mum?
02:16Know them?
02:18Know them?
02:20Do I look as if I know them?
02:22Does this caravan look as if it knowed them?
02:24No, Mum.
02:25No, I beg your pardon.
02:27I left the races on the first day.
02:29That's why I...
02:31Are you hungry, child?
02:32Yes, Mum.
02:33In that case, a bit of tea.
02:36You agree about having tea, old gentleman?
02:41George?
02:43Yes, missus?
02:44How'd you find that cold pie then, George?
02:47It weren't a miss, Mum.
02:49And the beer.
02:49Was it passable, George?
02:51It's more flatter than it might be, but it ain't so bad for all that.
02:54Is there another bottle and another pie, George?
02:58There is, that nun.
03:00Bring them up then, George.
03:03How far are you travelling tonight, child?
03:05To the next town on the road.
03:07We don't quite know how far it is.
03:09Eight miles?
03:17Eight miles.
03:18Eight miles.
03:28Eight miles.
03:29It sounds a long way.
03:30Oh, it is a long way.
03:31Eight miles is always a long way, isn't it, George?
03:33Am I right, George?
03:34You are, missus.
03:38We're not a heavy load, George.
03:41We're not a heavy load, George.
03:42Well, we isn't, Mum.
03:43Would they make much difference?
03:46They're not very heavy.
03:47They don't look very heavy.
03:50The weight of the pair, Mum,
03:52would be a trifle under that of Oliver Cromwell.
03:55Oh, no.
03:55Oof.
04:06No, no.
04:07Oh, no, lovely.
04:19Hm.
04:21Say what you like.
04:22I think he's quite unnecessary.
04:25I wouldn't say unnecessary, old chap.
04:29We've always managed without a clerk.
04:31Who needs a clerk? What's the point to a clerk?
04:35You still forget the circumstances, old chap.
04:40Hello? Anyone at home?
04:43Any of the devils we're here is brass at a premium?
04:46Very good, sir. Very good indeed.
04:49Quite charming and eccentric.
04:51Dear me, what humour he has.
04:53Is that my Sally?
04:54Is it justice with the bandage off her eyes?
04:57Without the sword and scales, is it the virgin of the law?
05:00Such an amazing flow of spirits upon my word.
05:03It's quite extraordinary. Let me help you, sir.
05:06Now come through the door, you fool.
05:08Brass! Here he is, look.
05:11There's a clerk for you. There's a prize.
05:13There's an ace of trumps.
05:15We'll be quick, Brass, or another lawyer will snap him up.
05:31There she is. There's the woman I ought to have married.
05:35Oh, the beautiful Sally, who has all the charms of her sex and none of its witnesses.
05:39Oh, silly, silly, silly, silly, silly.
05:41Oh, your nonsense, Mr Quilk. Do.
05:43I wonder you're not ashamed in front of a strange young man.
05:47Mr Richard Swiveller, my intimate friend.
05:51Gentleman of good family and great expectations,
05:53but who is content for a while to fill the humble position of a clerk.
05:58Brass, Mr Swiveller is yours.
06:01Oh, I'm very glad, sir, very glad indeed.
06:03Mr Swiveller is most fortunate, sir, to have your friendship.
06:06You, er, you must be very proud, sir, to have the friendship of Mr Quilp.
06:12Oh. Very. Mm-hmm.
06:15Oh, Mr Quilp, I wonder if I might have a word with you regarding the emoluments.
06:22Oh, yes.
06:23We're happy to be paid today.
06:24I'll have to do this.
06:25Yeah, be better.
06:26Oh, Mr. I think it's a quote.
06:31Yes.
06:34Hmm.
06:34That is agreeable to you, sir.
06:36Yes, I suppose so.
06:38Oh, wow.
06:38And I suppose, er, Mr Swiveller enters upon his duties at once.
06:42Oh, at once, sir, if you please, by always.
06:44Miss Sally will teach him the law.
06:47The delightful study of the law.
06:49With Miss Sally, his days will pass like minutes.
06:54Where will Mr Swiveller sit?
06:56Oh, we'll buy another stool.
06:57What?
06:58We'll look about for something strong and second-hand.
07:01In the meantime, if Mr Swiveller will take my seat
07:03and try his hand at making a fair copy of this ejectment notice,
07:08I shall be out pretty well all morning.
07:12Walk with me.
07:14I have a word or two to say to you.
07:16I'm going away for a day or two.
07:18Matters of business.
07:20You won't forget that, Mr Swiveller, eh?
07:23The start party upstairs while Mr Cope's away, eh?
07:31Have you the time to walk with me, Mr Blass?
07:34Points of business to discuss before a journey, eh?
07:37Have I the time to walk with you, sir?
07:39My time would be fully occupied indeed
07:41if he did not allow me to walk with you.
07:43It's not everybody, sir,
07:44who has an opportunity of improving himself
07:46with the conversation of Mr Quill.
08:02Well, child, how are you enjoying this way of travelling?
08:05It's very pleasant indeed.
08:07Oh, it is.
08:08It is in the case of people who retain their spirits.
08:12For myself, I suffer from aloneness in that respect.
08:16I need a constant stimulant.
08:20A medicine, you know.
08:26That's the happiness of young people.
08:28You don't know what it is to have aloneness of spirits.
08:32You've got your appetite, too.
08:34What a comfort that is.
08:36Yes.
08:48Read that.
08:50Charlie's Waxwork.
08:51That's me.
08:53I'm Mrs Charlie.
09:02Never.
09:04Never, child, go into the company of a filthy punch after this.
09:10I never saw Waxwork, ma'am.
09:12Is it funnier than a punch?
09:13Funnier.
09:15It isn't funny at all.
09:17It's not in the least funny.
09:19It's...
09:20It's calm and...
09:22What's the word?
09:24Classical.
09:26None of your low beatings and knockings about.
09:28None of your squeakings and jokings like your precious punches.
09:31No, no, no.
09:32It's dignified with a constantly unchanging air of coldness and gentility.
09:40And yet it's so lifelike that if only Waxwork spoke and walked about,
09:45you wouldn't know the difference.
09:48Is this here, ma'am?
09:50Is what here?
09:51The Waxwork, ma'am.
09:53Here?
09:54Here?
09:57Oh, bless you, child.
09:58What are you thinking of?
10:01Now, how could such a collection be here?
10:05What do you mean in the larder?
10:07Under the bed?
10:08Oh, no, no, no.
10:10The collection's gone ahead in the other vans.
10:12They'll be waiting there for us when we arrive.
10:14It'll be shown in the assembly rooms the day after tomorrow.
10:18Oh, you could there, of course, no doubt you'll see it.
10:20You're sure to see it.
10:22You couldn't stay away if you tried.
10:23That was hard.
10:24We may not be in the town unless it's the day after tomorrow.
10:28Not there.
10:30Not there.
10:32Where in the world will you be?
10:34I don't know.
10:36You mean you're traveling around the country not knowing where you're going?
10:41What a curious couple you are.
10:44What line are you in?
10:46You look to me at the racist child as though you were quite out of your element.
10:50We're poor people, ma'am.
10:52And we're wandering about.
10:54You amaze me.
10:57What do you call yourself, then?
11:00Not beggars.
11:01I don't know what else we are.
11:04Lord bless me, I never heard of such a thing.
11:07And yet you can read.
11:10And write too, I shouldn't wonder.
11:12Yes, ma'am.
11:14I can't, you know.
11:15Oh, but I'm sure...
11:16Not...
11:17Oh, well...
11:27Old man.
11:29Would you like a good situation for your granddaughter?
11:34Oh, no.
11:36I can't leave her.
11:38What would become of me without her?
11:41Well...
11:41If you're disposed to employ yourself, there's plenty of things you can do like...
11:47...helping to dust figures and taking checks and so forth.
11:52What I want your granddaughter for is to point them out to the visitors.
11:57Of course, I usually go round with them.
12:00I suppose I should go on doing so.
12:02But the lowness of my spirits make a little ease occasionally absolutely necessary.
12:09This isn't an ordinary offer, you know.
12:12This is no common offer.
12:15This is Jolly's waxwork, remember.
12:21None of your open-air vagrancy about Jolly's, you know.
12:24None of your tarpaulin and sawdust about Jolly's.
12:28Every article held out in the handbill is realised to the utmost.
12:32And the whole effect is of imposing brilliancy, unrivalled in the kingdom.
12:36Ladies and gentlemen, admission is only sixpence.
12:39It's an opportunity that may never occur again.
12:43Oh.
12:44Bought and lodging.
12:46As to the former, always good in quality.
12:50And plentiful in quantity.
12:51As to the latter, feather mattresses in the exhibition for the greatest security of aforesaid waxwork.
12:59As to salary, impossible to specify until abilities are tested.
13:07We'd be safe enough.
13:09There'll be earnings.
13:10And those men were going in the other direction.
13:12But are we far enough away?
13:14Yes, we must be.
13:17We must surely be.
13:19Well, child.
13:21We're very grateful, Mum.
13:23We accept your offer.
13:26Right, you all.
13:27Take your head.
13:28Here's your ears.
13:31This one.
13:33Quick.
13:41Boo!
13:42What?
13:43Oh, Mr. Slum.
13:44No offence is seeing you here.
13:46Oh, upon my soul and honour.
13:47That's a good remark.
13:49George, my faithful fellow.
13:52How are you?
13:54I...
13:56I came here today.
13:57I...
13:58Upon my soul and honour, I hardly know why I came here.
14:01Yes, I came here for want of a little inspiration.
14:04A little freshening up.
14:05A little change of ideas.
14:07By Gad, that's a devilish, classical thing.
14:10Quite minervian.
14:11It'll do quite well when it's finished.
14:13Quite well, quite well.
14:14Would you believe me when I say it?
14:16It has been the delight of my life to have dabbled in poetry
14:19so that I may exercise my pen upon such charming themes.
14:23By the way, any orders for a poem?
14:25A poetic advertisement?
14:27Five or six lines, maybe more, maybe less?
14:29It comes so expensive, sir, and I don't think it does any good.
14:32Oh, hush, Mrs. Charlie.
14:33No fibs, no fibs.
14:34I'll not hear you say fibs.
14:36I'll not hear you say a poetic advertisement don't do good.
14:39I don't think it does.
14:40Oh, ask the perfumers, ma'am.
14:43Ask the blacking maters, the hatters, the lottery office keepers.
14:46Ask any one of them.
14:48Watch my poetry.
14:49That's done for his business, and mark my word,
14:51you'll find he blesses the name of Slum.
14:54You're acquainted with Westminster Abbey, ma'am.
14:56I know Westminster Abbey.
14:58I certainly do.
15:00Then, upon my soul and honour, you'll know
15:02that in that dreary pile there is a certain poet's caller
15:06with many a smaller name than Slum.
15:09I've got a trifle here with me now.
15:14If I'd knowed a donkey what wouldn't go
15:18to see Mrs. Charlie's waxwork show,
15:21do you think I'd acknowledge him?
15:24No, no, no.
15:26Then run to Charlie's.
15:28I suppose that comes very expensive.
15:30Five shillings.
15:31Cheaper than any prose.
15:33I couldn't get more than three.
15:34And six.
15:34Oh, come, come, three and six.
15:35Shall I take it to the printers now?
15:37To be circulated only in the taverns amongst the likes of lawyers' clerks.
15:40We have your more genteel effusions of the private houses.
15:43You have enough upon my soul.
15:44Quite enough, thank you.
15:45Quickly to the printers.
15:46Oh, my dear lady.
15:49My dear, dear lady.
15:51Ha!
15:55A lovely lady.
15:56As lovely a lady as ever walked the earth.
16:03It is a very difficult situation.
16:05Difficult?
16:06Mr. George and Mr. Slum, two minds with but a single thought.
16:10Ah.
16:11To take a certain lady again to the altar.
16:14You mean...
16:15Yes, child, I do mean just that.
16:17To be Mrs. Slum or Mrs. George.
16:21A difficult decision.
16:22Especially if one suffers from a loner's soul spirits.
16:27Mr. George!
16:28Ready?
16:30Ready, Mrs.
16:31Then unveil, George.
16:35He's reliable, too.
16:37You can't say he's not reliable.
16:38But then Mr. Slum's so romantic.
16:41You can't say he's not neither.
16:57And another thing.
16:59He has a fondness for the figures.
17:04Now come, child.
17:06Ladies and gentlemen.
17:09This is the unfortunate maid of honour in the time of Queen Elizabeth,
17:13who died by the pricking of her finger because she worked on a Sunday.
17:18Observe the trickle of blood and the gold-eyed needle of the period.
17:26Ladies and gentlemen.
17:28Ladies and gentlemen.
17:30Ladies and gentlemen.
17:32Ladies and gentlemen.
17:32Let me introduce Jasper Packle Merton, of atrocious memory,
17:36who courted and married 14 wives.
17:40Jasper Packle Merton, 14 wives, atrocious memory.
17:42And then destroyed them all by tickling the soles of their feet while they were sleeping.
17:47The consciousness of virtue and innocence.
17:51Consciousness of virtue and innocence.
17:53Observe his finger, curled as if in the act of tickling, and his face represented with a wink.
18:00Finger curled, act of tickling.
18:02Wild boy of the woods.
18:05The lady who died of dancing at 132.
18:09The woman who poisoned 29 families with her pickled walnuts.
18:14Mr. Grimaldi.
18:16Mr. Pitt.
18:18A nun.
18:20A brigand.
18:22His Majesty, King George III.
18:28Mary Queen of Scots.
18:31The Quaker gentleman.
18:34George.
18:34Yes, Mrs.
18:35George, will you fetch me a wine glass?
18:44Oh, gentlemen.
18:45You look fatigued.
18:47Why don't you go and take some rest?
19:03Begin of the beginning, girl.
19:12This is the...
19:13This!
19:14Ladies and gentlemen!
19:17This, ladies and gentlemen, is the unfortunate maid of honour in the time of Queen Elizabeth,
19:24who died from pricking her finger because she worked on a sundae.
19:29Observe the tickle of blood, also the gold-eyed needle of the period.
19:34Very interesting.
19:35Refrain from touching the figures, please.
19:37Refrain from touching the figures.
19:38Admission only sixpence.
19:40We can't stay long, so be in time.
19:42The exhibition leaves in two days for a tour among the crowned heads of Europe.
19:46Be in time!
19:47Be in time!
19:47Be in time!
19:48Silence!
19:49And silence you too.
19:50Come here, Waxmore girl.
19:52Just give us the titles.
19:53Give us the titles.
19:54Yes, ma'am.
19:56This is His Majesty, King George III, ma'am.
20:11You!
20:12Waxwork girl.
20:13Yes, ma'am.
20:14You're a wicked girl.
20:15Are you a wicked girl?
20:16No, ma'am.
20:17You must be a wicked girl.
20:18Oh, no!
20:19You must be a wicked girl to be a waxwork girl.
20:21I'm employed.
20:22Employed.
20:25Employed.
20:25Employed in a waxwork.
20:27You could be employed otherwise you could be better employed.
20:30You could be assisting in the manufactures of your country.
20:34You could be improving your mind by the constant contemplation of the steam engine.
20:39Old man, let no one in till I return.
20:42You could be earning two ninepence or three shillings a week.
20:46A comfortable and independent subsistence.
20:48And what is a comfortable and independent subsistence?
20:50This child is employed here.
20:52You're interrupting her work.
20:53You're interrupting my work.
20:53Rubbish!
20:54You are addressing Mrs. Charley, madam.
20:56Am I now?
20:57Am I indeed?
20:59The proprietress of this kaleidoscope of wonder.
21:02Whom crowned heads have bowed before.
21:04The crowned heads of Europe, madam.
21:05And who might you be, sir?
21:09Slum.
21:10The poet Slum.
21:12Of whom no doubt.
21:13I've never heard.
21:17There's something funny about him.
21:19There's something funny about this whole display.
21:23Crowned heads of Europe indeed.
21:25A hundred figures.
21:26There aren't a hundred figures.
21:27Nowhere near a hundred figures.
21:29You should be in the stocks, ma'am.
21:30Oh!
21:31Ladies?
21:32Stocks?
21:33Did you say stocks?
21:35Yes.
21:37Stocks!
21:41Oh!
21:43Mad as a hatter.
21:45Remind me to get her likeness.
21:47We'll have her in wax.
21:50Be in time, be in time, be in time.
21:53Remember, this is Charley's.
21:55Charley's unique.
21:56Charley's stupendous.
21:57Over a hundred figures.
21:59The only genuine collection in the world.
22:02All others are impostors and deceptions.
22:04Be in time, be in time, be in time, be in time.
22:08Oh!
22:10Stocks!
22:12My dear lady.
22:13My dear, dear lady.
22:15Don't give it a thought, Mr. Slum.
22:17Don't give it a thought.
22:20Mr. Slum.
22:21Would you be so kind as to fetch me a wine glass?
22:26Ladies and gentlemen, this is the woman who poisoned 29 families.
22:36Come along.
22:36Come along.
22:37Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Grimaldi, whose antics as a clown have been a cause of amusement
22:43and hilarity to countless thousands.
22:48Mr. Pitt, a statesman and parliamentarian.
22:52Notice thoughtful expressions.
22:54Time, please.
22:55Time, please.
22:55I've gone wherever this time tomorrow.
22:57Remember, it's only sixpence.
23:00Giovanni Calabri, the notorious bandit.
23:03Here I will show you about pointing out the marbles.
23:07Two thousand innocent travelers.
23:10A nun of the Roman Catholic persuasion and of great personal attraction.
23:19Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Magity King George the Third.
23:25Be honest, love.
23:33I'll have you, my lovely.
23:35Well, well, have you.
23:37Well, have you.
23:39Yes, sir.
23:45Good day, sir.
23:47Good day.
23:47Gottlieb!
23:49Yes!
23:58What's she old?
23:59No, not old.
24:02No, not old.
24:02Not more than 64.
24:04Oh, 69.
24:06I'll see what they put on the coffin last night.
24:0969.
24:09What?
24:11No, not old!
24:15What?
24:18not oh it said on the coffin hey you there sure what was he say he's exceeding
24:29deaf sir in the little I'm looking for an old man and a girl we've got no man
24:34he's feeding oh I don't mean any old man you fool I mean an old mad gambler they
24:41took this road 79 79 she were set on the coffin 79 shut the old fool up now I'm asking
24:51you a civil
24:52question neighbor what was he say there's no one down here but us mind you soon will be soon
25:00there'll be a Becky Morgan sir I had them for mile after mile on the road they must have passed
25:05this
25:05way happen they fell in with the traveling folks there's been all kinds of traveling folk up and
25:12down the road sir some going to the races and summers ain't what was that traveling folk
25:19entertainment sir punch and Judy shows animals wrestling men dramatics waxworks inquire at the
25:28next in sir idiots he says you're quite right 89 poor Becky work
26:00so
26:09so
26:11so
26:11so
26:12so
26:31ORGAN PLAYS
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