- 5 hours ago
Off Campus
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:06Did you just say, you want me to give you a...
00:12Orgasm?
00:12Yeah.
00:13God, why is it so hard for boys to say orgasm?
00:16It's not hard for me to say orgasm.
00:17I can say orgasm.
00:19Orgasm.
00:20See?
00:21Just, are you still drunk?
00:23Okay.
00:23Yeah.
00:24Let's do this.
00:25Uh, I'm gonna tell you something really heavy, and you're gonna want to dwell on it, but
00:32you shouldn't.
00:33I'm just telling you the bad stuff so that you can understand my request.
00:38Okay?
00:39It's just a means to an end.
00:41Okay?
00:43A means to an end.
00:46Got it.
00:49I was raped.
00:53Wow.
00:54Okay.
00:54There's really no way to make that seem less heavy than it is.
00:58Uh...
00:58It happened in high school.
01:00I was drugged at a party.
01:02That's why I don't like drinking in public.
01:04Oh, shit.
01:04Uh, no, no.
01:05See, what you're doing right now is dwelling.
01:07And I need you to just breeze past this part, okay?
01:09Focus up.
01:10Graham, are you breezing?
01:11Uh, yeah.
01:12I'm breezing.
01:14I'm breezing.
01:15I...
01:15I had a lovely therapist.
01:17Her name was Carol.
01:18She had these mismatched mugs and a really extensive tea collection.
01:22Uh...
01:24She helped me understand that the rape doesn't define me.
01:28Even though I firmly put this behind me, I still can't seem to, you know, orgasm with
01:35a guy.
01:35I mean, on my own, sure.
01:37Fine.
01:37Fireworks.
01:38But, uh, yeah, not with someone else.
01:41Um, and things are going really well with Justin.
01:46He texted me saying that his roommates will be gone later.
01:49Um, and we all know what that means.
01:52I-I'm just really nervous about hooking up with him.
01:56I wanna be ready.
01:57So, I was thinking if I can finish with someone, you know, lower stakes first.
02:03Lower stakes?
02:04A friend.
02:05That I'd feel more prepared for Justin.
02:09So...
02:12Yeah.
02:12Wow.
02:13What do you think?
02:18Uh...
02:19Wow.
02:19Okay.
02:20Yeah.
02:20That was a lot.
02:21Sorry.
02:22Um...
02:22I'm kinda out of practice telling people about this.
02:25No one at Briar knows.
02:28Not even Allie?
02:30Just you.
02:33Wow.
02:34Yeah.
02:36Look.
02:38I promise that I have worked so hard to move past this.
02:42Okay?
02:42I'm not fragile.
02:43I don't need your pity.
02:44I don't need you to be my therapist.
02:46I just need you to do this one last thing for me.
02:49Okay?
02:50A thing you have done for many, many, many, many women.
02:55You know, it's just...
02:56It means to an end.
02:59Exactly.
03:00Okay.
03:01I'll do it.
03:04Really?
03:06You will?
03:06Of course.
03:08You're my friend and you need me.
03:17Did you mean now?
03:19No, no.
03:20Not now.
03:21I have class.
03:23Uh...
03:24Um...
03:25Uh...
03:26Later?
03:27Tonight?
03:29Tonight it is.
03:43I don't understand.
03:45Sweet, sweet talk.
03:47Can I just be the first to say how thrilled we are that you decided to pledge Sigtel?
03:51We welcome you to our brotherhood.
03:53Sweet talk.
03:54Okay.
03:55And as your future beg, it is my pleasure.
03:57Nay.
03:58My honor.
03:59To haze you.
04:01And all I ask is that you take care of that one little grape.
04:04Until I ask you to stop.
04:05That's it?
04:06That's it, bud.
04:07It's so simple.
04:09Yeah, I can do that.
04:12Guys, I gotta be honest.
04:13I was a little worried you're gonna make me streak across campus or frost my tips.
04:17No!
04:17No, no.
04:18Hey, I'm gonna be your big brother.
04:20Would your brother do something like that to you?
04:22I guess not, man.
04:23Yeah.
04:23Okay.
04:23Yeah.
04:24Well, thanks, y'all.
04:25This is gonna be really good.
04:27Well, just one last thing.
04:29Should anything happen to your fruit baby, it will be replaced by a slightly larger piece
04:33of fruit.
04:33Wait, what do you mean by that?
04:35Yo, it's a good one.
04:39Good luck, sweet talk.
04:41This is the part where you run.
04:43No, okay.
04:44Come on.
04:45Yellow, yellow haze.
04:49Yellow, yellow.
04:55How are you doing?
04:56I'm gonna be really good.
05:00I'm gonna be able to do that.
05:10Why?
05:14Did you do that?
05:17I'm gonna be able to do that now, inside the mic.
05:18The mic.
05:18I'm gonna be able to be able to get all the shots.
05:20Ah, see, what you just did, when your whole body relaxed.
05:25Now, were you thinking of specific chord progressions?
05:28No, I was thinking about listening to Paramore
05:31at my middle school bus stop.
05:33Made me feel so complicated in punk rock.
05:36Exactly, how it made you feel.
05:38You see, people think that pop music is shallow,
05:41but it lives deep inside us.
05:44It creates memories, it etches them into our bones.
05:49If you do it right, it lets us feel what you were feeling
05:53when you're writing it.
05:55That's what the judges want.
05:57You gotta let us in.
06:01Wow, that was really good advice.
06:03I know, I should be a teacher.
06:12And I knew it was a dream,
06:13because my childhood dog, Rosie, was there.
06:15But she was like dark brown instead of tan.
06:18I think we should break up.
06:22Okay.
06:25Wait, sorry, what?
06:28Okay?
06:29I just ended a two-year relationship.
06:31I mean, maybe you did.
06:33Also, maybe not.
06:36No, I definitely did,
06:38because I was there, and it was three seconds ago.
06:40How many times are you gonna do this to me?
06:42Do what? What are you talking about?
06:43Your whole Ali's breakup and five-act cycle.
06:46You go through the same stages every time.
06:48First, surprise fight Ali,
06:49which I can safely say we're in right now.
06:52Then, eats her feelings Ali,
06:53destroys three bags of hot Cheetos,
06:54followed by raging diva Ali.
06:56I mean, stop titling things.
06:57Like, these are things that happen.
06:58These are not things that happen.
06:59Then, complete and total breakdown Ali has a,
07:01well, that one's self-explanatory.
07:03And the grand finale?
07:04Late night phone call Ali,
07:06where you beg me to take you back.
07:08That is not what I do!
07:09That is exactly what you do.
07:11I know you better than anyone else in the world, Al.
07:13I know that you're secretly scared of cats.
07:15I know that you're out of ChapStick.
07:16Speaking of which,
07:19I stopped by CVS on the way over.
07:22And I know that you love me.
07:23And I love you.
07:26So, that is why I need to protect myself
07:27by opting out of the next 36 hours.
07:29No, our breakup is not an extended warranty, Sean.
07:33You can't just opt out.
07:34Well, the alternative is that I get angry or sad
07:37or beg you not to make this mistake again,
07:39but you will because you always do.
07:40And I disappear into some sad hole of video games
07:43and depression and ultimately take you back
07:45because I can't imagine my life without you.
07:49It's not fair to me, Al.
07:52Sean, I need you to hear me.
07:55I'm sorry if I've hurt you before.
07:58This is it.
08:00We're just going in different directions.
08:01And I don't even know what direction I'm going in,
08:03but I'm going there by myself.
08:08I'm not gonna call you.
08:12Okay.
08:17And I'm not at a ChapStick.
08:20Yes, you are.
08:23See you in 36 hours.
08:44Oh.
08:47shit
08:49what's wrong G can't rock a measly 205 anymore
08:52no yeah I'm
08:54oh thanks
08:58I'm fucking with you Graham
08:59I know
09:04right
09:15okay what's going on
09:18look Dean
09:18you're uh you're kind of
09:21well
09:24you've been with a
09:26good amount of women
09:27I always knew this day would come
09:29well Garrett when a man and woman love each other
09:31very much okay hold up
09:33hold up I'm listening
09:37is there something going on with Hannah
09:39no uh
09:42not Hannah
09:43someone else
09:45she wants me to do this uh
09:47this thing
09:49do all the things bro
09:50do them all
09:52it's just it's kind of a big
09:55thing
09:56it's really important to her
09:58she's like trusting me
09:59is Hannah a virgin
10:01what no
10:02dude don't
10:07don't
10:07don't make this weird
10:12this doesn't leave the weight room
10:13we're not actually having this conversation
10:17it's just that I uh
10:18I really want it to be good
10:20for her
10:21if it's her first time
10:22if it's her first time she might not come
10:23not an option she has to come
10:24respect
10:26well there is one thing
10:27that helps make a girl come
10:29the single
10:31most effective
10:32highly recommended
10:32enjoyed by all tool at your disposal
10:36trust
10:38that's it
10:38she's just gotta feel completely safe
10:41like completely relaxed
10:42but consent is key
10:44and she can't consent
10:46if she doesn't feel safe
10:47so you just
10:48you just gotta figure out
10:49whatever makes this
10:50specific girl who is not Hannah
10:52feel safe
10:53I'm just
10:56not sure
10:56I'm the kind of guy
10:58she should be trusting
10:59with this
10:59well
11:00she asked you
11:01she thinks you are
11:02which is fucking hot
11:06just
11:06don't
11:07skimp on the foreplay
11:09yeah
11:10talking
11:10five play
11:11six play
11:12yeah got it
11:13you know
11:13right
11:14thanks
11:14good talk man
11:15great talk
11:19sorry
11:19I was
11:21Justin
11:22hi
11:23it's easier ways to get my attention
11:25sorry
11:26yeah I was just on my phone
11:27I'm taking the piss
11:28don't worry about it
11:31my advisor really likes the song
11:33mostly
11:34okay yeah mostly
11:35yeah
11:35he has some notes
11:36but it's getting there
11:38cool
11:38you never replied to my text
11:42do you want to come over later
11:43and work on the song
11:46definitely yes
11:47but uh
11:48there's just
11:49one last thing
11:49I need to iron out
11:50before we
11:51dive into it
11:52um
11:53rain check
11:54rain check
11:55yeah
11:56yeah I'm really looking forward to it
11:57cool
11:58cool
12:00yeah
12:00yeah
12:01yeah bye
12:02I guess
12:03bye
12:03bye
12:03bye
12:04bye
12:04bye
12:08bye
12:09that's fair to go
12:10you wanted lights
12:12go see a show
12:13you ran away
12:14let's touch and go
12:16you're scared of love
12:17where aren't we all
12:18where aren't we all
12:23where aren't we all
12:25where aren't we all
12:36hey
12:37hey
12:48is that dress
12:50Ali's
12:51yeah
12:54um
12:55we did say seven
12:58right
12:58yeah
13:01uh come on up
13:12would you be
13:14um
13:15more comfortable wearing
13:17literally anything else
13:20maybe
13:25big vest
13:37uh
13:38you don't need to turn around
13:40you're about to see me naked
13:42yeah
13:43but not until you want me to
14:05uh
14:06all clear
14:11are nightgowns my thing now
14:13definitely
14:18uh
14:19yeah
14:20so
14:21are you gonna
14:22do it now
14:25oh
14:25well uh
14:27I mean as romantic
14:28as that is
14:29um
14:30here
14:32why don't you pick a song to play
14:34um
14:35just uh
14:36set the mood a little
14:37set the mood
14:39ew that's awful
14:40I can't
14:40I believe those words
14:41actually came out of your mouth
14:44people say that
14:47okay let me see
14:51wait this is one of your most played songs
14:54which one
14:55shh
15:01I'm setting the mood
15:09you're actually proving my point
15:11the mood is set
15:12is that right
15:13please
15:13this song is so sexy
15:15makes me want to do a sexy little dance
15:20what is happening to me
15:21the groove
15:23it's taking over
15:26look
15:29you're feeling it too
15:31oh
15:35okay
15:37oh yeah
15:38that's terrible
15:39I love it
15:43baby baby
15:44see first be mad
15:46I knew in this heart of mine
15:49I want to tell you
15:50the love we had
15:52could not be bad
15:54I put it right
15:55and bite my time
15:59spend the life
16:00by looking for somebody
16:02the love we had
16:03so give me the love
16:04like you
16:07now you told me that you
16:09want to leave me
16:10baby
16:10darling
16:11I'm there to get me
16:13baby
16:14oh
16:15oh
16:16oh
16:16oh
16:16oh
16:17oh
16:17oh
16:18oh
16:20oh
16:23oh
16:23oh
16:24oh
16:24oh
16:24oh
16:29oh
16:30oh
16:30oh
16:30oh
16:30oh
16:31oh
16:32oh
16:33oh
16:34oh
16:35oh
16:35oh
16:36oh
16:37oh
16:37oh
16:44oh
16:47oh
16:48oh
16:48oh
16:48oh
16:49oh
16:58I don't know.
17:46I don't know.
17:51I think we should stop.
17:54I don't want to stop.
17:56I can do this.
17:57No, you don't have to.
17:59But I want to.
18:01Okay?
18:04Fuck.
18:09I'm sorry.
18:11Sorry.
18:12It's okay.
18:13This is what happens.
18:18I'm in it.
18:19I'm having fun.
18:20I feel good.
18:24And then I just, like, zoom out.
18:27I leave my body.
18:31It's like I'm sitting there watching myself from across the room going, like, what is wrong with you?
18:38Nothing.
18:41Nothing is wrong with you.
18:43Like, what if, like, what if I'm broken?
18:53You're not broken, Wellesie.
18:56You just don't trust me enough to fully let go, and that's okay.
19:00No, but I do trust you.
19:03I wouldn't, I wouldn't be here if I didn't.
19:06But nothing is more vulnerable than sex.
19:11So, if you're not there yet, that sounds completely normal.
19:19Wow, that was, uh, surprisingly deep.
19:26I do have another idea.
19:29I mean, if you're willing to hear it.
19:33Yeah, okay, sure.
19:37Instead of me giving you an orgasm, why don't you give yourself one?
19:47That's not going to prove anything.
19:48I do that all the time.
19:50Oh, do you?
19:51Yeah.
19:52Good.
19:56Then, show me.
20:14And I'll show you.
20:40I'll show you.
21:07I'll show you.
21:45Stay here.
21:47Stay with me.
22:14I'll show you.
22:25Oh, my God, I did it.
22:35Thanks.
22:37No, no.
22:39Thank you, that was...
22:43Thanks.
22:56So what now?
23:03Drunk Shakespeare? Who's drunk?
23:05Like, the actors or the audience?
23:07Everyone.
23:08Last year's Hamlet got so drunk that he made out with the ghost of his own father.
23:12Yikes.
23:13Yeah.
23:14Okay, well, I'll wish Allie luck for me.
23:16Yeah.
23:18Jackpot.
23:20Always counting Tucker to make too much pasta salad.
23:25Why does he always put Brussels sprouts in it?
23:27Uh, yum.
23:29All right, give me.
23:30Yeah, you want this? It's got a little bacon on it.
23:31All right.
23:45I told you that was a sexy song.
23:48Gotta say, I'm surprised it's one of your most played.
23:50Kind of doesn't fit in with your whole, I'm a cool hockey man that listens to classic rock image.
23:55Hey, I'm a cool hockey man that contains multitudes, so.
24:04But actually, my mom used to, uh, play me all kinds of music.
24:08Yeah, she sounds cool.
24:09Yeah, she was cool.
24:11She had a huge record collection.
24:13She used to let me pick one out to play whenever my dad got too intense.
24:24How do you feel when you listen to that song?
24:27Why do you ask?
24:28It was just something my advisor said.
24:31Uh, I guess.
24:35I don't know, uh, it makes me feel bold.
24:37Bold?
24:38Yeah, like to just say, I like you, deal with it.
24:43That's badass.
24:44Yeah, it is badass.
24:52You know, I was thinking.
24:57Sorry.
24:58Uh, where were we?
25:00Uh, I actually probably should go.
25:03Uh, oh, are you sure?
25:05Yeah, yeah, I have, uh, a lot to do for the showcase and classes and, yeah, uh, but, uh, thank
25:13you for your service.
25:15It's much appreciated.
25:19See you soon?
25:21Yeah, okay, um, I'll text you.
25:32So, Garrett made you come.
25:33Yep.
25:34Then you're not freaking out.
25:35No.
25:36Uh, and you broke up with Sean.
25:38Yeah.
25:38Yeah, and you're not freaking out.
25:40No.
25:40Because if you were freaking out, I could break out the emergency stash of hot Cheetos.
25:45No.
25:45I can't let myself become eats her feelings, Allie.
25:48Because if I do that, I'll just keep backsliding through Raging Diva, Allie, and then Complete and Total Breakdown, Allie,
25:54and then next thing you know, I'll be Insurance Queen of Dorset, Vermont, Allie.
25:57God help us all.
25:58No, I promised myself.
26:00This has to be the last time.
26:02It has to stick.
26:03I'm actually doing pretty well so far.
26:05Like, I don't even really miss Sean.
26:09I believe you, uh, even if you are wearing his sweatshirt.
26:14This isn't his sweatshirt.
26:16Um.
26:23Oh, my God.
26:25I am a woman possessed.
26:27Ann, you gotta help me.
26:29I lied.
26:30I already ate the Cheetos.
26:31I licked the bag clean.
26:32Who is that?
26:33Who is that?
26:34Is it Garrett?
26:35Is it Justin?
26:35Like, please distract me with the sordid details of the intricate web that is your love life.
26:39Uh, uh, it's, it's Justin.
26:42So you're still into him?
26:44Of course I am.
26:45I worked out this whole orgasm problem so that I could be with him, didn't I?
26:49Well, yeah, I mean, yeah, but, I don't know, you might be digmatized by Garrett.
26:53You wouldn't be the first.
26:54Yeah.
26:56Okay.
26:57I'll admit it.
26:59The night was kind of perfect.
27:01Garrett made me feel really safe.
27:03And a lot of really, really good other things, but doesn't magically turn him into someone else, you know?
27:10No, you gotta take him at face value.
27:12Right, exactly.
27:14And the guy can't get through a single conversation without someone trying to sext him.
27:18Which is fine, because I, I got the orgasm, which is what I wanted.
27:23It's just an arrangement between friends.
27:26Yeah, and this, this won't make your friendship weird at all.
27:30We had a plan.
27:31The plan worked.
27:34There will be absolutely no weirdness whatsoever.
27:36It was so weird.
27:38Yeah, well, girls don't usually love it when other girls snap you during a hookup.
27:42Logan, this is Bernardo.
27:44Protect him with your life.
27:45Your life.
27:46Why do you care how the night ended anyway?
27:47Because he didn't want it to end.
27:50What?
27:50You guys have been talking about this all practice, and the answer seems pretty obvious.
27:58Hey, does Logan seem off to you guys today?
28:00What do you mean?
28:01I don't know.
28:02Bunch of missed passes, flubbed a goal, stuff like that.
28:04What?
28:04No, not you.
28:05Birdie.
28:06What do you mean?
28:07What's obvious?
28:07You're into her, dude.
28:08Fuck.
28:09I think you're right.
28:10All right, he's all over the place.
28:11Shut up, Joe.
28:12I should tell her.
28:13Yep.
28:14Like today?
28:15Yep.
28:17Shit.
28:17He's going to drunk Shakespeare later.
28:19Sounds like you're going to drunk Shakespeare.
28:21Hey, Joe.
28:21Watch Bernardo.
28:22Who?
28:26Who's going to drunk Shakespeare?
28:28Anna.
28:28Bernardo.
28:28Amazing, I'm there.
28:30Hold this for Birdie.
28:33So why don't we go to drunk Shakespeare?
28:35We are not going anywhere.
28:37Birdie thinks I should tell Hannah how I feel about her.
28:40How do you feel about her?
28:42Finally.
28:43I'm telling you it's the right move, G.
28:45We all fuck with Rosie, and I think she's good for you.
28:49No!
28:50Bernardo, ow!
28:52Okay.
28:52We're going to drunk Shakespeare.
29:03Okay, dramatic entrance.
29:05Whatever.
29:06Seriously.
29:07What's your damage, Heather?
29:08Nothing, just a shitty practice.
29:10Really?
29:12That's it?
29:13Yeah.
29:14That's it.
29:15Garrett, he was just so busy talking about Hannah that we missed a bunch of passes and
29:19it just made me look bad.
29:21Ah, I see what's happening.
29:24This is about your dumb crush on Hannah.
29:26What?
29:28That's...
29:28I don't...
29:32Convincing.
29:33Don't bother.
29:34I saw the way you were staring at her at karaoke.
29:36This is so like you.
29:37You want things you can't have.
29:38No, I don't.
29:39You need a fucking wake-up call.
29:40Maybe Garrett can afford to get distracted chasing a little crush, but you can't.
29:44You don't have a guaranteed deal with the Bruins.
29:45Jules, I get it.
29:46You've been passed over twice in the draft.
29:48Your chances of making it to the NHL are slimmer than Timmy Chalamet.
29:51And if you don't make it, it's you and Mom.
29:53At the garage.
29:55Forever.
29:57Is that what you want?
30:00No, it's not what I fucking want.
30:02I'm just saying.
30:04If you're going to chase an impossible dream, chase one that actually matters.
30:13Shut up.
30:14It's okay, boy.
30:21This mingle with the audience before the show schtick is such hacky student director bullshit.
30:26It's immersive.
30:27We're breaking down the aesthetic distance.
30:28Give me a fucking break.
30:29Hey, whoa, babe.
30:30Maybe we've turned the corner into Raging Diva Alley.
30:33Oh, maybe you've turned the corner into Cuntsville.
30:36I'm so sorry.
30:37I didn't mean that.
30:38No, it's okay.
30:39It's your first show at Briar without Sean.
30:42Yeah, you just really used to help calm me down, you know?
30:44I'm kind of nervous.
30:46Yeah, maybe it is making me a little bit of a...
30:49Katherine!
30:49Don't touch a prop, that's not dirt!
31:04Hey.
31:05Hey.
31:06You're here.
31:07What are you doing here?
31:14I'm glad you're here, but...
31:16Well, Beau recruited me.
31:17I have to steal this from Tucker.
31:19Spock!
31:19Oh, my...
31:20Sorry.
31:21You kidding me?
31:22Hey, well, Z.
31:23Hey.
31:24Jordan?
31:25Justin.
31:26Oh, right.
31:27Yeah.
31:27Yeah, sorry.
31:27My bad.
31:28That's all good, man.
31:29Uh, is Beau and Dean Draka here?
31:31Yeah, man.
31:32Well, you know Dean.
31:33He's persuasive.
31:35What about you, bro?
31:35You big Shakespeare guy?
31:36Uh, not really, but, uh, Hannah told me she was coming, so, here I am.
31:41Ha-ha.
31:42Oh, she did?
31:43She did.
31:45Looks like the show's starting.
31:48Yeah.
31:48Do you want to go to sit?
31:50Couch is free.
31:52Yeah, yeah.
31:53We should probably sit.
31:54Yeah.
31:55See you around, man.
31:56Yeah, brother.
32:13Come on, bitches.
32:14Let me hear you all scream for our gay show.
32:18A midsummer.
32:20Nights.
32:21Scary!
32:26Now, virgins oft find drunk Shakespeare scary.
32:31If it's your first time, I'll pop your cherry.
32:34And there's only one rule, my sweet, gentle twinks.
32:37When an actor calls line, everyone drinks.
32:42I like that.
32:43That's great.
32:44So that's great.
32:46What?
32:46What?
32:50You know, I'm so sorry, everyone.
32:52It seems that the actors that we're going to play, our four young lovers, have all been
32:57struck by a terrible affliction.
33:01True love?
33:03No, gonorrhea.
33:04Oh!
33:09We'll be needing some brave volunteers from the audience.
33:14You go.
33:16You go.
33:16Well, would you look at this couple.
33:22Give it up for our Hermia and Lysander!
33:34Thanks.
33:35Thanks.
33:35I love this.
33:36Ew.
33:37Okay.
33:38Next, I need a big, strong man to play Demetrius.
33:43Me, Garrett Graham.
33:44I want to be in the show.
33:45Shut the fuck up.
33:46You can't tell her how you feel sitting here on your ass.
33:48Come on.
33:49Come here, pookie.
33:50That's okay.
33:51No, I'm all right.
33:51You're all right, son.
33:53Come on, give me a hand out.
33:54All right, all right.
33:56Yeah!
34:03Okay, now we just need a Helena.
34:05She's a real messy bitch who wants to get in Demetrius' pants.
34:10Can anyone relate?
34:16Allow me.
34:19Not even going to wait to be picked.
34:21That is messy.
34:22Let's hear it for our four young lovers.
34:25From the game, right?
34:27Hannah, please, everyone knows the girl who locked down Garrett Graham.
34:31Uh, no, no, I didn't lock him.
34:33I mean, we're not locked.
34:35He is free to unlock anyone he wants.
34:40All right, Hermia, let's get you all caught up.
34:45All right, you're in love with Lysander.
34:50But your big bad daddy is forcing you
34:54to marry Demetrius.
35:00What say you, Hermia?
35:04But daddy, I love him!
35:06Daddy, she loves him!
35:18Now, after this, we've got, like, ten minutes of Rude Mechanical's BS, so feel free to help
35:24yourselves to our wet bar.
35:27Okay.
35:31So your life is practice, class, repeat, and now also the theater.
35:37Can we seriously not do this right now?
35:39Do what?
35:39You're broadening your horizons.
35:42I think it's fun.
35:48Looks like Hannah's broadening her horizons, too.
35:53You know, you didn't have to mess with her like that.
35:55She's not my girlfriend.
35:57But you clearly want her to be.
35:59No, I don't.
36:00Please, you can deny it all you want, but I looked at you the same way for months.
36:08Kendall, about the way that I ended things, I was kind of a dick.
36:12Don't.
36:14Don't apologize to me.
36:15Just make yourself feel better.
36:16I was just going to say, you know, it sucks when you like someone and they don't like
36:20you back.
36:21It does.
36:22If I knew just how much it sucked, I probably would have done some things differently.
36:29So, I'm sorry.
36:32And really, will you accept my apology if I promise to keep feeling bad about it?
36:38I was having so much fun being a bitch.
36:42Fine.
36:43Yeah, okay.
36:43I accept.
36:48I don't know.
36:49Marvel.
36:50It's foul, but it's effective.
36:55I see that neighbor eat the system, they can ask of me.
36:58What angel wakes me from my flowery bed?
37:01I pray thee, gentle mortal, sing again.
37:05Mine ear is much enamored of thy note.
37:08And so is mine eye enthralled to thy.
37:17To thy smile.
37:24And thy sweatshirt.
37:27And how surprisingly ripped thou art.
37:29And how thou always made me chocolate chip and blueberry pancakes because thou knowest I
37:34want both, even though thou aren't really eating carbs right now.
37:37And so what if thou favors missionary?
37:39Me thinks I could get on board with missionary.
37:42Oh, sweet bottom.
37:43Out to Vermont.
37:44Do not desire to go.
37:46Please do not desire to go.
37:58Holy shit, she's incredible.
38:00Yeah, man.
38:00She really is.
38:05Line.
38:12Line.
38:15Line.
38:17Line.
38:18Line.
38:18Line.
38:18He said it.
38:18Line.
38:23Okay, I understand your confusion.
38:25This is what's happening here.
38:26I am fucked up, man.
38:28Line.
38:30It's not even your line.
38:32Excuse me, I'm thirsty.
38:34Okay, are these drama kids better than drinking?
38:36No, no, no.
38:37I get it, I get it.
38:38What's going on?
38:38I totally get it.
38:42Pyramus and Fisbee are us all.
38:43Good.
38:44All right?
38:45Well done.
38:45You see, Tuck?
38:47Tuck here.
38:51Welcome back, my lover.
38:56Oh, looks like you two had a good time.
39:00And it's about to get even better.
39:05I made this love potion special for the boys.
39:09It's a real knockout.
39:12And wouldn't you know it, when they came to,
39:14they only had eyes for Helena.
39:20Okay, loving this.
39:23But, fools and mortals,
39:25who will win fair Helena's hand?
39:29How is a bucks a maiden ever to decide?
39:32Oh, I know.
39:35How about a good old-fashioned dance-off?
39:40Which one of you wants to take the poem first?
39:44Garret!
39:46Garret!
39:48Garret!
39:48Garret!
39:50Garret!
39:51Garret!
39:51Garret!
39:52Garret!
39:52Garret!
39:53Garret!
39:53get out there!
39:55Fuck you guys.
39:57I just wanna have a song
39:59Cause my son
40:00I just wanna get into the next thing
40:03Oh!
40:04Look at that!
40:05You're so good!
40:05I'm gonna do it!
40:06Go, Luribs!
40:08Go, Luribs!
40:08Yeah, I'll kill you, Luribs!
40:09I'm a man now
40:10Think I'm gonna go
40:11He was fed
40:12Do what you like
40:14You've been too nice
40:15He didn't do right
40:16That's too good
40:17I'm on
40:18You are done
40:19You're tryna cash out
40:20You're in your face
40:21They're tryna match out
40:23And I'm not the one
40:24Until them stand out
40:25They just...
40:26You know, I was thinking about asking you out
40:30And the reason I didn't
40:31Is because I thought you and Garret were serious, but...
40:35I guess you know
40:40Nope
40:41Uh, definitely not serious
40:43Cool
40:45Look, I'm...
40:46You know, I'm normally into theatre, but...
40:49You know, I'm really glad I came
40:53Yeah, me too
40:54Yeah
41:05And girls just wanna dance
41:07And girls just wanna dance
41:10If we shadows have offended
41:12Think but this
41:13And all is mended
41:15That you have but slumbered here
41:18While these visions did appear
41:23Hey
41:24Hey
41:26That was some show you put on out there
41:28Very boys gone wild
41:29Thanks
41:31Yeah
41:31I, uh, bet you're happy about this second love potion
41:35You and Justin, back together
41:36Yeah, well, all's well that ends well
41:41That's... that's Shakespeare
41:42Yeah, I know
41:43Sorry
41:47Um...
41:49Actually...
41:50Justin said he wants to ask me out
41:54Uh...
41:55Uh...
41:55Congratulations, that's...
41:56Uh...
41:57Yeah, you...
41:58Did it
42:03Yeah
42:04Yeah, uh...
42:08So I... I guess this means our deal is...
42:12Officially over?
42:15Right?
42:17Uh...
42:18Yeah, right
42:21Yeah, I mean, I got you the grade
42:24And I got you the guy
42:28Hey
42:30I want to serve with that Fakaten call
42:33Ready?
42:35Sure
42:36Sorry
42:36Mm-hmm
42:58Uh...
42:59Uh...
43:02What I'm saying...
43:08Uh...
43:11Uh...
43:12I...
43:14Uh...
43:17you're getting some good power behind the shot still going wide no as long as you keep in the
43:22rink remember eastwood freshman year yeah that wasn't on me all right birdie took the shot i
43:29just deflected off my stick and bragg steve i bought him a beer he's fine
43:36hey sir i couldn't make the shakespeare today
43:40yeah it's okay i'm not eating this much so you and hannah
43:50i don't know what i was thinking i don't have time for a girlfriend
43:57hey i'm sorry man i know you're really into it
44:05it's fine there's a plan in place for me team captain frozen four ruins all i gotta do is
44:14follow through it's a good plan people would kill to have that plan right exactly
44:22and it was just a distraction
44:25yeah i mean sometimes you don't get everything you want
44:36but you're garrett graham all right things are gonna work out for you okay they always do
44:47yeah well for you too man it's me and you on the bruins that's the dream right
44:52yeah that's the dream
44:56anyway i was gonna hit up my logs if you wanted to join
44:58you look like you could use it that's all right i'm gonna stay
45:03sure yeah all right now see you later
45:06all right bud
45:48i know i said i wouldn't call
45:53and that's how i'll end the difference between billy joe armstrong and hayley joe osmond
45:59yeah that's that's funny
46:04i'm i'm really glad we got to spend some time together
46:07outside of rehearsals
46:10yeah same
46:13oh i fucking love this song
46:17why do you love it so much
46:18well i mean facade is the baseline and the way it interacts with the lead guitar
46:22it's
46:22no i'm sorry
46:25i actually mean
46:27what does it make you feel
46:29i mean jealous i didn't ride at first
46:33uh why what does it make you feel
46:38uh nothing
46:39i mean they're not for everyone
46:43yeah
46:46hey this
46:47this party's kind of dead right
46:50do you want to come back to mine and
46:52justin
46:52let me guess
46:53brain check
46:57not quite
47:12this is garrett
47:16no phones allowed on the ice so leave a message
47:39now that i need you i can touch you so
47:43i build my world around you i need you so
47:48baby even though you don't need me
47:53you don't need me baby
47:58now that i've found you i can let you go
48:03i build my world around you i need you so
48:08baby even though you don't need me you don't need me baby baby since first we met
48:21i knew in this heart of mine
48:26the lovely hat could not be bad i played it right and i bide my time
48:38spend a lifetime looking for somebody to give me love like you
48:48now you've told me that you wanna leave me darling i just can't let you
48:57baby now that i've found you i can let you go
49:05i build my world around you i need you so
49:10baby even though you don't need me you don't need me
49:18baby you don't need me you don't need me
49:47i need you don't need me you don't need me me
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