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Rivals - Season 1 Episode 8 | English Sub
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Transcript
00:00:08Hello, good evening, and welcome to How to Stay Married with me, James Vereker, and over here,
00:00:15the woman lucky enough to call herself my better half, my wife, Lizzie.
00:00:21Thank you, darling. Hello.
00:00:23Now, a wise man once said, marriage isn't a battlefield, it's a partnership,
00:00:28and married people should be comrades, not rivals.
00:00:32Though that's sometimes easier said than done.
00:00:36How do you stay connected after 20 years of children, careers, everything?
00:00:42How do you keep each other interested over dinner or in the bedroom when the honeymoon period comes to an
00:00:48end?
00:00:49We'll be chatting to a range of celebrity and ordinary couples to ask, how do they make it work for
00:00:55them?
00:00:55And we'll find out if the grass really is greener on the other side of the fence.
00:01:14We'll be quizzing the experts on how to keep a marriage fresh without seeking excitement elsewhere.
00:01:20We'll discuss how to deal with the pain if one of you breaks the rules.
00:01:25And how to keep your feet on the ground when you're thinking about walking away.
00:01:52Gosh, that's a lot to get through, isn't it?
00:01:54Well, we did say, till death do us part.
00:01:57So, stay tuned.
00:01:59And stay married.
00:02:01Mm.
00:02:54Good afternoon.
00:02:55This is Rupert Carvel Black, MP for Chalper and Bisley, reminding you to vote conservative.
00:03:01Keep the Cotswolds blue.
00:03:04Hi!
00:03:06I know that's a cheese.
00:03:09Cotswold blue.
00:03:12Don't let live attack our cheese.
00:03:31It's lovely to see you again this morning.
00:03:33Thank you so much.
00:03:34Oh, baby, I'll take you down, I'll take you down.
00:03:40But no one's ever gone before.
00:03:43If you want more, if you want more, more, more, more, more, I say jump, for my love.
00:03:55What are you talking about?
00:03:58Lots of signatures.
00:04:00What do you think about doing this professionally?
00:04:01Very funny.
00:04:03What?
00:04:04Oh, yeah, let me, there's an act to...
00:04:07Do you mind?
00:04:26Patrick O'Hara.
00:04:27I finished university.
00:04:29I'm a real grown-up now.
00:04:32We don't have time for declarations.
00:04:34You're a lovely boy, but I'm...
00:04:35You're what?
00:04:36Busy being the mistress of a wanker.
00:04:40Can I kiss you?
00:04:42Jesus, Patrick.
00:04:43I...
00:04:44You have no idea.
00:04:48You look fucking incredible, by the way.
00:05:08Yeah, I think the Vickham's quite taken with you.
00:05:10I'll be invited to tea at the rectory.
00:05:13Well, I'll do anything for the cause.
00:05:17Yeah, me too.
00:05:19Yeah, you're quite the campaigner.
00:05:25Oh, Seb's here.
00:05:27Yeah, he's taken me to the cinema.
00:05:31You're going out with him.
00:05:35I like him.
00:05:37He's decent.
00:05:39Well, is that the best you can hope for, decent?
00:05:44Well, maybe I'm fed up with sitting around waiting for my life to happen.
00:05:48Making sandwiches for everybody else.
00:05:54Hey.
00:05:55Hey.
00:05:55You okay?
00:05:56Yeah.
00:05:56You ready?
00:05:57Yeah.
00:05:58Taggy.
00:06:01Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow.
00:06:05Yeah.
00:06:06Yeah.
00:06:22Okay, next item.
00:06:24As you know, we're finally putting something punchy in Declan's old slot, Sarah's show.
00:06:28Still working on the format.
00:06:30Newest idea is we bring in a co-host to mix things up a bit.
00:06:33Finally.
00:06:35A co-host?
00:06:35More like a magazine, but spicier.
00:06:37Network loves the idea.
00:06:39It's not your fault, Sarah.
00:06:40Primetime slot is a big thing for you to carry by yourself.
00:06:43Who is it?
00:06:43We're working on the details.
00:06:44Obviously it won't be James.
00:06:45What?
00:06:46Your cots will round up.
00:06:47Can't dilute the brand, can we?
00:06:49Okay, next.
00:06:50Great gardens.
00:06:51We need a new location now that we're pulling green lawns.
00:06:53Do we need to pull it?
00:06:55Freddie Jones is actively campaigning to bring down Carinium.
00:06:58Why would we put his house on our gardening show?
00:07:01Well, it might be a show of strength if we go ahead anyway.
00:07:03And means that we gain access to the property.
00:07:05See if we can't pump Mrs. Jones for info.
00:07:08Yes.
00:07:09Good.
00:07:09Let's go ahead.
00:07:11Now then.
00:07:15Am I a man of my word?
00:07:18Cameron.
00:07:21You are a man of many words.
00:07:23Am I a man of my word?
00:07:28Yes, of course.
00:07:30I think we'd all agree, Tony.
00:07:33Would you?
00:07:35That's curious, because I quite clearly remember telling you not to speak to any of those venturer
00:07:41traitors.
00:07:42Do you remember what I said, Ginger, would be the consequence?
00:07:48Instant dismissal, Tony.
00:07:51In which case, Mr. Burroughs, am I to take it you no longer acquire Carinium Services as an employer?
00:08:05Um...
00:08:06Sorry.
00:08:07You were observed attending a screening of Absolute Beginners at the Colchester Regal with Taggy O'Hara.
00:08:18He was spying on me.
00:08:19It's franchise season, Sebastian.
00:08:21I'm spying on everyone.
00:08:22It's self-preservation.
00:08:23And it turns out entirely necessary, given that you're a double-crossing little shitbag.
00:08:28So now, I'm going to make an extremely fucking public example of you.
00:08:32I'm not only going to make sure you never work in commercial television again.
00:08:36I'm going to make sure there's no job for you on any channel, anywhere.
00:08:40I'm going to make sure you can't get a job selling televisions at Rumbelows.
00:08:49Escort Mr. Burroughs to his car, would you, Ginger?
00:08:51Don't let him clear his desk.
00:08:52But I have...
00:08:53I'm very fucking glad you're leaving here with all ten fingernails.
00:08:57All right, then.
00:08:58Off you all, fuck.
00:08:59And thank you for your loyalty.
00:09:00It has been noted.
00:09:02Quick chat, Cameron.
00:09:15I brought this little guy as requested.
00:09:21You can have it back as soon as Lady Gosling's had a good look.
00:09:24Where were you Friday night?
00:09:25Home.
00:09:26I rang, you didn't answer.
00:09:27I unplugged my phone.
00:09:29Wanted to make sure I got a good night's rest prepping for Grey Gardens.
00:09:31You're not wearing your ring.
00:09:35Close to my heart.
00:09:38I didn't want people asking questions or...
00:09:40Patrick O'Hara was at your house.
00:09:43And I told him where to get off.
00:09:46I know.
00:09:49You know you don't have to spy on me, Tony.
00:09:55Ready to go for a spin?
00:10:02You've done a spectacular little job.
00:10:04The cameras are going to love it.
00:10:05We only feature the very best gardens on the programme.
00:10:08Oh, wow.
00:10:09Monica's at the Falken Road, of course.
00:10:10Mm-hmm.
00:10:11And the Duchess of the Badminton.
00:10:12And then, Mon, she doesn't mind.
00:10:14With all of the unpleasantness.
00:10:16I haven't spoken to her in weeks.
00:10:19Monica feels, and I agree, you're so special.
00:10:23And showcasing this lovely garb,
00:10:25that's far more important than petty personal feuds.
00:10:29Oh, I just wish we could all go back to how it was before.
00:10:31We were all friends.
00:10:34Do you, um...
00:10:36Do you have to host meetings here?
00:10:38Oh, yes.
00:10:39They hole up in Fred Fred's office and I just leave them to it.
00:10:42You know the hardest thing is remembering who's siding with who.
00:10:44I'm so glad you said that.
00:10:46I can't remember from one day to the next.
00:10:48I'm sure we've got a couple of moles.
00:10:49Yes.
00:10:51Yes, Freddie is worried about moles.
00:10:53Really?
00:10:54Mm.
00:10:55He's been putting castor oil everywhere.
00:10:57I'm terrified I'm going to wake up in the morning
00:10:59and find molehills all over the lawn.
00:11:01HE SIGHS
00:11:02HE SIGHS
00:11:06Er...
00:11:16Oh, you have to come down more often.
00:11:22HE SIGHS
00:11:24Drive safe.
00:11:35HE SIGHS
00:11:37What? He came for a cup of tea?
00:11:38Oh, Jesus Christ.
00:11:39We had a drink.
00:11:44Is there something you want to ask me?
00:11:46Hmm?
00:11:46Do you know where your daddy is?
00:11:48I mean, because I don't see you hounding him.
00:11:50But daddy would never.
00:11:51Oh.
00:11:52I am sick of your disapproval.
00:11:54You have no idea what I've done for this family over the years.
00:11:57Well, I don't know why you bother if you resent it so much.
00:11:59Well, you don't even like me.
00:12:01I love you. You're my daughter.
00:12:02When you look at me, all you see are the things you've done wrong.
00:12:05That's bloody unfair. I nearly died giving birth to you.
00:12:0820 years ago.
00:12:14Malhar offered me a part.
00:12:16A part?
00:12:17Yes. A part. In a play.
00:12:19Like I used to do parts in plays.
00:12:20But I don't anymore because I'm stuck down here.
00:12:23It's a play in London.
00:12:24Well, what did you say?
00:12:27No.
00:12:29Of course I did.
00:12:33Sorry.
00:12:35I guess, yeah.
00:12:36I guess it's nice to be honest.
00:12:40No, it's not, Taggy.
00:12:42You get so used to putting other people's needs first that it becomes second nature.
00:12:47And then one day you look at yourself and you think,
00:12:51Why in fuck's name did I do that?
00:12:54But by then, it's too late to change.
00:13:02Goodbye.
00:13:19Darling!
00:13:22I'm so glad to see you.
00:13:24Just supporting my husband.
00:13:26Not that he needs it.
00:13:27Oh, oh.
00:13:30What brings you to Valerie's opening?
00:13:32Sticker bombing.
00:13:33Hmm.
00:13:34I managed to get one on Valerie's bottom.
00:13:36Oh.
00:13:38Closest to our opening I ever want to get.
00:13:40They probably shouldn't be talking, since we're with rival consortiums.
00:13:46Consortia?
00:13:46I don't know.
00:13:47Consortia?
00:13:48Consortiums?
00:13:49Hmm.
00:13:50Hmm.
00:13:50Anyway, it doesn't matter.
00:13:52We're all adults.
00:13:53I'm not giving you up for the sake of any stupid franchise.
00:13:56You're the closest thing I have to a conscience.
00:13:59How many gentle flowers grow in an English country garden?
00:14:07I'll tell you now of some I know, and those I miss, I hope you'll pardon.
00:14:15Dappletills had seasoned flocks, middle sweet and lily stocks, gentle luminant tall hollyhocks,
00:14:21roses, pox, blocks and drops, forget-me-nots, in an English country garden.
00:14:33This is horrendous, isn't it?
00:14:35Absolute hell.
00:14:37Lemonade, Mrs. Veracombe.
00:14:38Thank you, Sharon.
00:14:40Lovely hat.
00:14:42Okay.
00:14:48Just hang on one second.
00:14:49If whatever you can do, thank you so much.
00:14:52Stop it.
00:14:53Stop it.
00:14:54James is having an affair with Sarah Stratton.
00:14:58You're not dying.
00:15:01I shouldn't have told you that.
00:15:02You'll leak it to the Scorpion to discredit Carinion.
00:15:07Why don't you leave him?
00:15:08He's a wanker.
00:15:14I...
00:15:17I booked a hotel room to have an affair with Freddie.
00:15:22Then I bottled out.
00:15:25Hated myself.
00:15:26Everyone does it.
00:15:30Really, everyone.
00:15:32All these people.
00:15:34What?
00:15:35Her.
00:15:35Over there.
00:15:36In the hat.
00:15:38Oh, is she fucking that man next to her?
00:15:40Why is she not looking at him?
00:15:42Him and her.
00:15:43Hmm.
00:15:44Handjobs in the potting shed.
00:15:46I mean, am I really the only person holding out?
00:15:54Does that make me a bit simple?
00:15:59Should I be able to hold more than one man in my head at once?
00:16:10I can't even make it a show about fidelity, for God's sake.
00:16:15Yes, you're an embarrassment of cronium television.
00:16:19Blimey.
00:16:20Oh, God.
00:16:20Bit of a circus, isn't it?
00:16:23Ah.
00:16:24Send in the clowns.
00:16:25Uh, speaking of which, they're about to film your spouses.
00:16:30I think I'll, um, go and watch.
00:16:41You didn't come.
00:16:45I tried.
00:16:46I couldn't get out of the car.
00:16:49I'm sorry.
00:16:51Yeah.
00:16:53No, it's probably for the best.
00:16:58You probably were out when you said no the first time.
00:17:09There's seconds away, James.
00:17:10Quiet, please!
00:17:12And action, James.
00:17:14One only has to look at your borders, Mrs. Jones,
00:17:16to appreciate what an extraordinary gardener you are.
00:17:19Tell me, what's your secret?
00:17:20How do you grow such whopping glands?
00:17:22Well, James, I feed them with growmore,
00:17:25and obviously I stake them very tall,
00:17:28so they're not flopping over everywhere.
00:17:30Can we have some quiet, please?
00:17:33Quiet!
00:17:35Right, Deirdre, are we ready?
00:17:38Oh, for God's sake.
00:17:40Cops!
00:17:41I'm so sorry.
00:17:42You all right?
00:17:42It's like working in a zoo.
00:17:43Why is there a dog off the lead?
00:17:44Can we find out why there's a dog off the lead?
00:17:46Okay, shall we try this again?
00:17:48Are we ready?
00:17:49Are we ready?
00:17:49I'm ready.
00:17:50Action!
00:17:51One only has to take a look at your borders, Mrs. Jones,
00:17:53to realize...
00:18:01I'm here to pick you up.
00:18:04I have my car.
00:18:05Well, Ginger will drive it, won't you?
00:18:07Okay, I don't understand.
00:18:10They're taking you out.
00:18:11I'm here to pick you up.
00:18:53It's the Ventura franchise application.
00:18:58Okay, but how did you get it?
00:19:00Ginger did a little light espionage at Greenlawns.
00:19:05Oh, can I read it? What's in it?
00:19:07Enough else to get our teeth into.
00:19:09We'll pick over it tomorrow.
00:19:17Tonight is about you and me.
00:19:26Listen, I know I don't say it enough, but...
00:19:29Tony, people can see us.
00:19:40Dance with me.
00:19:42Nobody's dancing.
00:19:43I don't care. Come dance.
00:19:45Don't be too old.
00:19:49We are young.
00:19:53Heartache to heartache we stand.
00:19:57No promises, no demands.
00:20:03Love is a battlefield.
00:20:08I remember what I said about the ring.
00:20:11Once we win this, we'll do this whenever we want.
00:20:14Cool.
00:20:20Love is a battlefield.
00:20:21We are strong.
00:20:23No one can tell us we are all of the being.
00:20:26No one can tell us we are all of the being.
00:20:29Searching our hearts for so long.
00:20:35Both of us knowing
00:20:41Love is a battlefield
00:20:57Come on, Tag. A, B, C or D?
00:20:59None of them.
00:21:00No, you have to pick one.
00:21:01Come on. Otherwise, how do we know which four-momentimo character you're going to marry?
00:21:07Tag, have you seen this?
00:21:08What?
00:21:10Shall we?
00:21:13Rupert and Clinch with Cook.
00:21:15Oh, my God. You're in the Scorpion.
00:21:17You're the Cook.
00:21:19It's Cameron Cook. They must mean Cameron.
00:21:21Cameron?
00:21:21No, it's definitely you.
00:21:24Seb's going to be devastated. Losing his job. Now this.
00:21:27What about Cameron?
00:21:28It's Rupert and Cameron. Didn't you know?
00:21:31Well, she really picks him, doesn't she?
00:21:33Oh, God, please. It will ruin everything for Daddy if it comes out.
00:21:36I shouldn't have told you. Please, Patrick. Leave it alone.
00:21:44Tomorrow, at the public meeting, we all need to be able to answer whatever questions come up.
00:21:49Seb's been doing some briefing notes for everyone.
00:21:52I know that he has more time in his hands, but we need to know this back to front like
00:21:56Cameron does.
00:21:58Where is Cameron?
00:21:59With the Dark Lord, I suppose. I rang him this morning. We should announce him.
00:22:02Gerald, you've got a spare copy. I couldn't find mine this morning.
00:22:05Ah, yes.
00:22:06Rupert does that a lot.
00:22:07Why does this have to be at Carinium? Should the public meeting be on neutral ground?
00:22:10No, it's deliberately stacked in favour of the incumbent. It's simpler for everyone if they get to keep the franchise.
00:22:16So the IBA make it easy to defend and difficult to challenge.
00:22:21Look, we have to prove we've got the money and experience to take over the building,
00:22:24because plenty of franchise applications fall at this hurdle, so, you know.
00:22:28You've got your best side.
00:22:30It's not anything.
00:22:38You think this is funny?
00:22:41Oh, come on. It's just tabloid nonsense tonight's chip paper.
00:22:44You promised me you wouldn't touch her.
00:22:46I didn't touch her.
00:22:47What the fuck is that?
00:22:49The seatbelt wasn't working.
00:22:50You made him promise not to touch me.
00:22:53I'm 20 years old.
00:22:54Oh, so something did happen then, didn't it?
00:22:58She's seeing Seb, isn't she?
00:23:02Seb is nothing.
00:23:04No, it's okay.
00:23:06She's her own person.
00:23:07Yeah, you see, she's her own person.
00:23:11Get out of my house.
00:23:12Daddy, for God's sake, stop!
00:23:14Jack, you hear me?
00:23:15Seriously, this is too funny.
00:23:16You're going to be serious if your life depended on it.
00:23:18What the fuck do you have riding on this?
00:23:19I put my house up.
00:23:21I bought the Bluebell Wood so you could clear your debts.
00:23:24You've had all my money. What more do you want?
00:23:25Look, Steve...
00:23:27Should we get back to work and stop talking about who gets to touch up, Tang?
00:23:31Come on!
00:23:33Stop!
00:23:35Come here, come here.
00:23:36Brick!
00:23:36We need you, come here.
00:23:37Brick!
00:23:38Calm down, now.
00:23:39Come on, child.
00:23:40It's not...
00:23:41It's...
00:23:42Oh, gosh.
00:23:42The fuck is your offense, man?
00:23:44Jesus Christ.
00:23:46Fuck.
00:23:48What happened?
00:23:50You shouldn't be here.
00:23:51It's not safe.
00:23:52I was going to call, but I got scared in case Tony bugged the phone.
00:23:55That's paranoid, darling.
00:23:57No, not anymore.
00:23:58It's not.
00:23:59Tony has seen the application.
00:24:01He knows all of our plans.
00:24:03What?
00:24:04How?
00:24:09Freddy.
00:24:11You got your copy?
00:24:30We should probably get someone to fix that.
00:24:34I'm for bed, darling.
00:24:37Oh, that Green Lawns.
00:24:39Mm, it's in Great Gardens, too.
00:24:41Come and watch with me.
00:24:42And here I am, surrounded by a...
00:24:43Laugh at Valerie's gruesome borders.
00:24:45Yellows, greens, blues...
00:24:46Yeah, it's all right.
00:24:47...oranges, indigos, all the colors of the rainbow.
00:24:50And who's this little collection of colorful characters we have here?
00:24:53See?
00:24:53She's got loans.
00:24:54...rambler.
00:24:55I think he's a little camera shy, don't you?
00:24:58And what's the inspiration behind this piece of landscaping here?
00:25:00Oh, well, James...
00:25:02What does she feed those enormous clavioli?
00:25:04Same thing she feeds her children.
00:25:06To me.
00:25:08And reflected it does.
00:25:10Almost blinded.
00:25:11Oh, look.
00:25:12Poor James.
00:25:13This is the same color as the marigolds.
00:25:16She looks like she's dressed for Ascot.
00:25:19Lady Valerie of Bulgaria.
00:25:21What's your secret?
00:25:22How do you grow such whopping glass?
00:25:24Oh, well, James, I feed them with grow more.
00:25:26And obviously I'll stake them very high so they're...
00:25:28Oh, well, James.
00:25:31Whoopsie-daisy.
00:25:36It's Robert.
00:25:38Viva!
00:25:39Jakey, we find out why there's a dog off the lead.
00:25:41I, uh...
00:25:42...dose it on my table.
00:25:43She's in front.
00:25:49What's that?
00:25:50Are you ready?
00:25:50A little small one.
00:25:51Hang on for one moment.
00:25:53Jakey, ready?
00:25:55Shall we try that again?
00:25:57Are we doing here?
00:25:58Bear away.
00:26:11Fever seems besotted with Miss Cook, doesn't he?
00:26:16It's rather like he knows her.
00:26:18I am so scared.
00:26:28Okay.
00:26:36Bye.
00:26:38Bye.
00:26:44Bye.
00:26:46Bye.
00:27:04The day of reckoning arrives.
00:27:06Could we say the application was just sitting on Freddie Jones' desk?
00:27:10Makes them sound appallingly careless.
00:27:13I'm not sure we want to admit to trespassing and theft, do we?
00:27:16It's a fair point.
00:27:18The best way to take advantage of this little windfall is to pull apart every idea they've
00:27:22got.
00:27:22Poor scorn on every word they say this afternoon.
00:27:27We've got it all worked out, right, Tony?
00:27:31Absolutely.
00:27:33No question.
00:27:35It's ours.
00:27:38Never pays to think something's definitively yours, in my experience.
00:27:44Let's not rest on our laurels just yet.
00:27:51Emotions are riding high in Rocha in the battle for control of the central southwest television
00:27:56region.
00:27:56The franchise holder, Carinium, will go head-to-head at a public meeting with new consortium venturer,
00:28:02led by TV presenter Declan O'Hara, MP and former Olympian show jumper Rupert Campbell Black,
00:28:08and tech wizard Freddie Jones.
00:28:11They've got the charm, but can they convince the IBA that they've got the chops to catch
00:28:16the crown?
00:28:16Land and Bomb.
00:28:18It's a nice bit.
00:28:20Let's go.
00:28:21Let's go.
00:28:22Let's go.
00:28:22Let's go.
00:28:23You can't score.
00:28:24Why is it all that you can score?
00:28:28When two drives go to war, point is all that you can score.
00:28:36Yeah?
00:28:41I've given you back the time
00:28:44I've taken it out
00:28:46I'll take it for the black guys
00:28:51I'm praying it's all you can score
00:28:56But two times don't walk
00:29:23I'm praying it's all you can score
00:29:33Why the candles? Are we on television?
00:29:35I was for the evening news
00:29:36Don't stare at them and they'll look like a game show
00:29:38Oh look there's Charles
00:29:40Hello Charles
00:29:41Henry try and remember who's on his side
00:29:43If you need help just ask
00:29:49I'm better on the subject
00:29:50You can get on that room
00:29:51Oh yes
00:29:52Good idea
00:30:00We know he'll come to Carinium
00:30:01I don't understand
00:30:03Come on
00:30:03Listen it's daddy's big day
00:30:05And we're here to support him
00:30:11I'm just going to find a seat
00:30:13No no no you're up here with us
00:30:15Ragsags sort of bunch aren't they
00:30:17Spent half the time fighting each other apparently
00:30:20Embarrassing
00:30:21Yes
00:30:23Well we can talk to him
00:30:30Goodness
00:30:31All human life is here
00:30:33Mostly pond life over that time
00:30:36What the hell is B.T. Johnson doing here?
00:30:42Hello darling
00:30:49Is everything okay?
00:30:54Love you
00:30:58Ladies and gentlemen
00:31:00The meeting is about to begin
00:31:01This consultation aims simply to determine
00:31:05If the new company Venturer
00:31:06Has the capacity to be a contender
00:31:09For the southwest central franchise
00:31:11We will inform Venturer by telephone
00:31:13Later in the evening
00:31:14If they may submit a formal franchise application
00:31:17And however in the meantime
00:31:18This is an opportunity for you
00:31:21The public
00:31:22To give both sides a good grilling
00:31:25So are there any questions from the floor?
00:31:29Yes lady at the back over there
00:31:31With a very tight perm
00:31:34Can I please ask both teams
00:31:36When you're going to start showing bingo on the telly?
00:31:39Well we're absolutely committed to bringing
00:31:42As many different sports to the viewing public
00:31:45So if there's an appetite for bingo
00:31:47Absolutely
00:31:47Ah yes I was rather wondering
00:31:50If James might sign my blouse
00:31:53Yes my company's been developing
00:31:55Satellite television for a while now
00:31:56Dishy Daniel won't be leaving
00:31:58Four men went to mow this next series
00:32:01But Venturer we've got plans to show polo
00:32:04I'm sorry that the chipping sodbury WI
00:32:06Feel we've disproportionately covered news from Cotter
00:32:08So Venturer
00:32:09Are going to harvest this technology for domestic use
00:32:12That's something that we've got
00:32:13And corinium haven't
00:32:15Oh and yes I would be
00:32:17Delighted to sign your blouse
00:32:20We'll ensure he removes his shirt
00:32:22At least once an episode
00:32:27Yeah we'll keep it on the network
00:32:29If it's popular
00:32:30Well um I'll respond to that if I may
00:32:33The underdog team over there might expect
00:32:36To retain all of your favourite programmes
00:32:38But I'm afraid
00:32:40They belong to corinium
00:32:43Cots will round up
00:32:44Ladies and gentlemen
00:32:45Imagine a world without that sofa James
00:32:49No master dog
00:32:50No Dorothy dove
00:32:53And ladies and gentlemen
00:32:54What that means
00:32:57Is no more four men went to mow
00:33:00Sorry lads
00:33:01What a dreary prospect
00:33:04And what about the future
00:33:07Our newest output brings us to a whole new frontier
00:33:10Of entertainment
00:33:12Most imminently we're replacing our tired old talk show Declan
00:33:16With a brand new format
00:33:18And a new presenter
00:33:20Joining Sarah Stratton in her first ever television job
00:33:25Celebrity gossip columnist
00:33:27Beatty Johnson
00:33:34Heading up uncensored
00:33:37The naughtiest
00:33:39Most gossipy show on the independent network
00:33:42Because that's what we do at corinium
00:33:45We serve you the television you want
00:33:50Your station
00:33:52Now and always
00:33:57Because who wants to feel like their television station
00:34:00Is some rich man's second hobby
00:34:04Honestly what does Rupert Campbell Black know about broadcasting
00:34:14I know people
00:34:17I know this area
00:34:19From representing you all in parliament
00:34:21I've knocked on a damn sight more doors than Tony Battingham has
00:34:24And look at the audience
00:34:26That have come today to support Ventura
00:34:28We've got a Cotchester Council gardening team
00:34:31The Chipping Sodbury WI
00:34:33Bisley Ballroom Dancers
00:34:35The Headmaster from Rugbra
00:34:37And the lads
00:34:38From Cotchester Rugby Football Club
00:34:40Ventura
00:34:41Ventura
00:34:43Ventura
00:34:44They know a good team when they see one
00:34:46This lot
00:34:47A team
00:34:47A team
00:34:48Ask Rupert where he got that bruise
00:34:51There are a bunch of amateurs
00:34:53Brawling
00:34:55And bruising
00:34:56And bedding other people's wives
00:34:58The drama
00:35:00Should be on the screen
00:35:02Not off it
00:35:13No you're right
00:35:17They do deserve better
00:35:25You deserve better
00:35:29You all deserve better than the shice Tony Battingham's been pumping into your living rooms for all these years
00:35:38You deserve better than endless quiz shows that cost nothing to make and nourish nobody's soul
00:35:45Yes they have a good drama
00:35:48But one
00:35:48One good drama
00:35:50We will make dozens
00:35:52There will be venturer shows all over the network
00:35:55So you can be proud of the work that comes out of the central southwest
00:36:01We're not in this to make money
00:36:03We are in this to make joy
00:36:08Because what is television for?
00:36:11I don't think Tony Battingham's asked himself that in a very long time
00:36:16Christ it shows
00:36:18You know what I think it's for?
00:36:22Community
00:36:24People used to sit around the fire for their stories
00:36:29Now we sit around the television
00:36:31We point our chairs at the corner of the room
00:36:34And that is where we commune
00:36:38Television has the power to bring us together
00:36:42To help us forgive each other
00:36:47And we've had a stupid fight
00:36:53To give us a window
00:36:56Into others lives
00:36:59To bring new ideas
00:37:02Into our homes
00:37:04It is
00:37:05I believe
00:37:08The greatest art form man has created
00:37:10I got into this business
00:37:12Many years ago
00:37:14In the pursuit
00:37:15Of truth
00:37:17And integrity
00:37:20And I still believe in both
00:37:23And you deserve better
00:37:27And we will move mountains
00:37:29To give you better
00:37:30If you put your faith in us
00:37:32And give us a chance
00:37:43To give us a chance
00:37:47Go!
00:37:48Go!
00:37:49Go!
00:37:50Go!
00:37:50Go!
00:37:52Go!
00:37:53Go!
00:37:53Go!
00:37:56Go!
00:37:57Go!
00:37:59Go!
00:38:01Go!
00:38:08I have to spend months fighting this. When does it ever stop?
00:38:11We don't know the verdict yet.
00:38:13Oh, Christ, you see Gosling's wizened face light up at Declan's blarney lyricism.
00:38:17Then we have the swear campaign. More scandal, more dirt.
00:38:21Ginger, you wouldn't know dirt if it shut itself into your face.
00:38:24Do you have any idea of the size of dirt you've managed to miss this week?
00:38:26You were supposed to be my fucking eyes and ears.
00:38:30Get better reports on Helen fucking Keller!
00:38:37Well done, darling.
00:38:39Thank you, sweetheart.
00:38:46I meant what I said.
00:38:48I just hope that it won't actually happen.
00:38:50You were just brilliant. Everybody loved it.
00:38:52Thank you, sir, Alan.
00:38:55Where's he got all these people?
00:38:56Hello, Agatha. I bet you didn't expect this lot.
00:38:59Sorry we're a bit rowdy with you.
00:39:02This is from all of us.
00:39:04Yeah, Rupert. I reckon she's the keeper, don't you?
00:39:08Oh, mate, she's our top striker.
00:39:15We did good, right? We did okay.
00:39:17Hey.
00:39:18Hey.
00:39:20It's all back to yours, apparently.
00:39:21Ah, apparently.
00:39:41And why didn't you tell me he was bringing in B.T.?
00:39:43I didn't know.
00:39:44I don't know what the hell he's doing.
00:39:46When something's going on with him, he knows something, or I...
00:39:49It's okay.
00:39:50We're gonna win this.
00:39:55And what if we don't?
00:39:56I'll look after you, whatever happens.
00:39:58Okay?
00:39:59Promise.
00:40:00Can you come to the Priory?
00:40:04I'm supposed to be here,
00:40:05but I'll slip away if I can.
00:40:17Come on, Sarah.
00:40:19Lizzie.
00:40:20Lizzie, listen.
00:40:21Sarah's not coming out.
00:40:23Do you just go in and see she's all right?
00:40:25Oh.
00:40:26I think you could go in if it's your wife, Paul.
00:40:29What can't we see coming out of the ladies?
00:40:31I'm a member of parliament.
00:40:32Look, let's go grab a drink.
00:40:33The womenfolk can join us later.
00:40:55Sarah, are you all there?
00:41:00Um, I must have eaten something.
00:41:06Nerves.
00:41:09That woman.
00:41:11Why has he put me with her?
00:41:14My big chance, and then it's her.
00:41:18Bloody Tony.
00:41:20Do you know, I spent my life running around
00:41:22after these men who just can't be trusted,
00:41:24and they have all the power.
00:41:27They just squeeze us out like toothpaste.
00:41:30Not even toothpaste.
00:41:32They don't need us at all.
00:41:33Oh, I think they do.
00:41:37But fuck them, right?
00:41:42We should stop putting them first.
00:41:46Do what we want.
00:41:48Not just the right thing.
00:41:50All the time.
00:41:54I'm not sure I've ever done the right thing.
00:42:01I've got to go.
00:42:02Your husband's looking for you.
00:42:12Thought I told you to fuck off.
00:42:16No, darling.
00:42:17It's me.
00:42:26I'm here to say, come home.
00:42:31Archie's waiting in the car.
00:42:32Why do I have to bring the boy
00:42:34to see his father being humiliated?
00:42:36We both know it's not that you're angry about.
00:42:40But perhaps this is a test.
00:42:45It's time for you to decide.
00:42:48I've been loyal all of these years,
00:42:51but even my stoicism has a limit,
00:42:54so do be careful.
00:42:57Come home tonight and let's talk about it.
00:43:02Because if you don't,
00:43:05I'll take the children to my sisters in the morning.
00:43:19Would be rather a thing to win it, though, wouldn't it?
00:43:23I love you guys.
00:43:26You don't need sign for this show, do you?
00:43:28I need nothing, mate.
00:43:33There it is.
00:43:39Legs on that end.
00:43:41I think I might be in there.
00:43:42You fucking idiot.
00:43:45What if Declan finds out?
00:43:46Not to mention he's a friend and it's wrong.
00:43:49You've never objected to a bit of wife-sitting before.
00:43:56Goodness, when did you get so morally fibrous?
00:44:00Damien lives on the piano.
00:44:01She's fucking amazing.
00:44:07So, what happens now?
00:44:09We're just waiting on Lady Gosling to call to say if we're through to the next round.
00:44:12Yeah.
00:44:13You sure you can't stay?
00:44:15Yeah.
00:44:16I've had a lovely time.
00:44:17But they're tired, so I'll take them home.
00:44:21Fingers crossed.
00:44:23Thank you, darling.
00:44:24Thanks for coming.
00:44:26I'm really proud of you, Fred Fred.
00:44:35Love you.
00:44:38Stop slouching, Sharon.
00:44:39You look like a potato.
00:44:46Turn around, right eye.
00:44:49Every now and then I fall apart.
00:44:51Turn around, right eye.
00:44:55Every now and then I fall apart.
00:44:57Every now and then I fall apart.
00:44:58And I need you now tonight.
00:44:59Have another drink.
00:45:00Sit down and relax.
00:45:02And I need you more than ever.
00:45:05And if you only hold me tight.
00:45:08We'll be holding on forever.
00:45:13Yes, I'm making it right.
00:45:16And we'll never be wrong.
00:45:19Together we can make it to the end of the time.
00:45:22You're loving the shadow on the end of the time.
00:45:27Don't know what to do when I'm always in the dark.
00:45:31Living in a powder keg and giving off.
00:45:34Oh, I really need you tonight.
00:45:38Forever's gonna start tonight.
00:45:42Forever's gonna start tonight.
00:45:43Forever's gonna start tonight.
00:45:44For the time I was falling in love.
00:45:47Hello.
00:45:48Now I'm only falling apart.
00:45:53There's nothing I can do.
00:45:55A total eclipse of the heart.
00:46:01A total eclipse of the heart.
00:46:09A total eclipse of the heart.
00:46:12A total eclipse of the heart.
00:46:12A total eclipse of the heart.
00:46:12I'm still a bloody black.
00:46:15Do you think you'll get it?
00:46:17Lots of hurdles to jump, yeah.
00:46:19I think we did a really good job tonight.
00:46:24So, is this a night off then?
00:46:26Yeah.
00:46:31Come on.
00:46:33Come on.
00:46:35Come on.
00:46:39Have you got any idea how fucking beautiful you are?
00:46:59how are you surprisingly well frankly mother knew me this morning first time in months
00:47:09made me feel like life is possible and i wanted to say to you that even if you can't love
00:47:16me then i
00:47:17think friends would be rather nice charles i think i found someone to marry
00:47:31goodness well she's a nice girl from a good family and she she likes me in the right way
00:47:39do you like her i think we get on rather well i really think i could bear to be married
00:47:45to her
00:47:46especially if it meant everyone would stop asking me why i'm not married
00:47:50it'll give me the respectability i need for my career and then
00:47:56and then we can meet together
00:48:01still in secret but safe
00:48:12i don't know if i can live without this without you
00:48:25so
00:48:54I've never done this before.
00:48:57What's it?
00:48:58They're adultery.
00:49:00I've written about it a lot.
00:49:03I've never met anyone I wanted to do it with before.
00:49:36It's so nice to feel soft we're becoming hard with.
00:49:55I'm gonna declare this an area of outstanding natural beauty.
00:50:28I've never met anyone.
00:50:28I've never met anyone.
00:50:40What's going on?
00:50:44I'm going to Linden.
00:50:47Malhar offered me a part in a doll's house.
00:50:52I thought you didn't get it.
00:50:54It's a different part.
00:50:57It's the maid.
00:50:58You're playing the maid?
00:51:00Yeah.
00:51:02Declan, yeah.
00:51:06Because as it turns out, I'm not a star anymore.
00:51:12As it turns out, I spent too long following you around.
00:51:18For wherever you wanted to be.
00:51:21There for the children so that you get to do what you want to do.
00:51:26I want to work.
00:51:33I need to work.
00:51:37And you of all people should understand that.
00:51:47And if you'd been even remotely available to me recently,
00:51:52you would have been part of that decision, but you weren't.
00:51:56So I made it myself.
00:52:09We need you here, love.
00:52:12You actually don't.
00:52:15Good luck with the franchise bit.
00:52:18Mummy.
00:52:18Tag, stop her.
00:52:19She said she's going to London to do a fucking play.
00:52:21I am going to London to do a fucking play.
00:52:25And I should never have left it this long.
00:52:30Goodbye, my sweetheart.
00:52:36Please don't go.
00:52:38Maud, please.
00:52:50Did she get that?
00:53:04Hello?
00:53:06Yes.
00:53:07Hi.
00:53:07Lady Gosling.
00:53:09No.
00:53:09No.
00:53:10Of course no.
00:53:10I appreciate your calling.
00:53:11Thanks very much.
00:53:21Yes.
00:53:24Yes!
00:53:25You, the Robert!
00:53:31Way to go!
00:53:36Later tonight, the battle in the central southwest television region is on.
00:53:41Incumbent company Carinium now being challenged by Venturer, headed by Carinium's biggest star, Declan O'Hara.
00:53:49Along with ex-show jumper and minister for sport, Rupert Campbell Black,
00:53:53today's meeting was to decide if Venturer has the capacity to be a serious contender for the franchise.
00:54:10I'm sorry.
00:54:12Leaving already?
00:54:18Do you really pop to my office?
00:54:20For what?
00:54:23Never asked me that before.
00:54:33Across the country, regional television franchises are being renewed often,
00:54:38with the incumbent city pretty remaining unchallenged.
00:54:42How long have you been sleeping with Rupert Campbell Black?
00:54:46Come on.
00:54:53What am I having?
00:54:55Just a bit.
00:54:59What's that?
00:55:00Just a bit.
00:55:01No, no, no.
00:55:02That's exactly what you're saying.
00:55:04No, no, no.
00:55:07No, no, no.
00:55:09I'm sorry.
00:55:09You're not afraid of.
00:55:09No, no.
00:55:11I'm not afraid.
00:55:17No.
00:55:26No, no, no.
00:55:35I was spying on him, on Venturer.
00:55:37Oh.
00:55:40So what information did you fuck out of him for me?
00:55:44Turns out I'm not a very good spy.
00:55:46Oh, don't fucking goad me.
00:55:49There is no one in the world you could sleep with.
00:55:53He is the worst man in the world.
00:55:57You knew that.
00:56:01Oh, you fucking reek of him.
00:56:09I'll keep it whatever you want.
00:56:11I'll bring my solicitor tomorrow.
00:56:13I'll start the divorce.
00:56:14I'll do anything.
00:56:15Just swear you will never let that man touch you again.
00:56:20Just let me have this one, please.
00:56:26I'm sorry.
00:56:31I will sack you so hard.
00:56:33You can't sack me.
00:56:35I'm resigning.
00:56:36Your visa's tied to your job, darling.
00:56:38I'll make sure you're on a first plane back to America.
00:56:42Yeah.
00:56:43Well, I will marry Rupert.
00:56:47Then I can stay.
00:56:50Venturer might have won this battle.
00:56:52Have they won the war?
00:56:54That's the question on everyone's lips.
00:56:56They have been successful putting together an impressive ball comprising the great and the good of Russia.
00:57:03People used to sit around the fire for their stories.
00:57:08Now we sit around the television.
00:57:11That is where we commune.
00:57:14Television has the power to bring us together.
00:57:16Fuck you!
00:57:22To help us forgive each other.
00:57:25We've had a stupid fight.
00:57:28To give us a window into others' lives.
00:57:32To bring new ideas into our homes.
00:57:36Where's mommy?
00:57:37It is, I believe, the greatest art form man has created.
00:57:44Hi.
00:57:46Hi.
00:57:49Hi.
00:58:01Seb's a nice boy.
00:58:03Are you all right?
00:58:05Yeah, he's lovely.
00:58:06He's a good sort.
00:58:07Yeah.
00:58:10Only he's not you.
00:58:16What's her?
00:58:20I don't know why I just said that.
00:58:22I think I'm tired.
00:58:31It's the franchise.
00:58:33I cannot.
00:58:35I'm trapped.
00:58:36I can't get out of here.
00:58:37I'm not asking you to.
00:58:41She's not you.
00:58:45I can't breathe without you.
00:58:49I can't breathe without you.
00:58:54I can breathe without you.
00:58:56I can breathe.
00:59:06I can breathe.
00:59:12I can breathe.
00:59:18I want to be so excited.
00:59:41First ever television job, celebrity gossip columnist, B.D. Johnson,
00:59:47setting up uncensored, the naughtiest, the most gossipy show on the independent level.
00:59:56Because that's what we do at Carinion.
01:00:01We serve you the television you want, your station, now and always.
01:00:29Music playingone.
01:00:29Is the one who says Farman?
01:00:46If you have a car, what happens to you?
01:00:47Oh, my God.
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