- 4 days ago
Minder S01E08 Come in T-64, Your Time is Ticking Away
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00:112, 4, 6 minutes in house, POP in about 5 minutes.
00:51March 27th, Langham is in hospital, good evening, fine.
01:08Yeah?
01:09Cab, love.
01:10What?
01:11Mini cab.
01:12Well, what about it?
01:13You called for a cab.
01:14Not me, love. I don't want a cab.
01:16Is this 2, 4, 6 minutes in house?
01:38Howdy.
01:38Yeah?
01:39Oh, tell.
01:40Listen, what sort of shape, man?
01:43Well, it could be bad, but I'm all right.
01:44Do you fancy a workout in the ring?
01:46Yeah, I don't mind, have you?
01:48Charlie.
01:51Charlie.
01:52On the pavement, yes.
01:53In there, no.
01:55Come on, you're cheering me up, aren't you?
01:56The man's a champion, a pro champion.
01:58So what?
01:59You're an ex-pro, you can handle it.
02:01Now, the thing is, his sparring partner couldn't turn up today.
02:04So, well, I mean, you'd be wearing the headgear now.
02:06There'd be a drink in it for you, what'd you say?
02:11Yeah, all right.
02:27It's a bit short, isn't it, Kevin?
02:29It's worse than last week.
02:30And it'll probably get shorter.
02:32Another one of the drivers had an accident this morning.
02:35What happened?
02:36His motor caught fire.
02:38Badly.
02:39Cremated.
02:41He wasn't in it, was he?
02:43Oh, no, no, luckily, no.
02:44So, rent's paid for this week, all right?
02:47Yeah.
02:48Well, that's something, I suppose.
02:51You're all hot, Arthur.
02:53Well, I can't afford to make sentiment with business, can I?
02:56It goes on like this, it won't be any business.
03:00Candy cabs.
03:02Yes, sir, we're two, sir.
03:04At about five minutes, sir.
03:08Roger.
03:08Roger.
03:09Roger, four, eight, mate, one, nine, three, the Grampian.
03:11Roger.
03:12What do you mean there won't be any business?
03:14We've lost eight drivers in a fort, mate.
03:18Eight?
03:19That means we're down to 19.
03:21And some of them only come in when they want to.
03:23Look, why don't you advertise in the local papers?
03:26There must be geezers out of work with motors.
03:29In fact, the only way you can afford a motor these days is be on the bloody doll.
03:32I have advertised.
03:34All these accidents.
03:36Do you know what I think?
03:38No.
03:40Someone's having a pop at us.
03:50Go on, Terry.
03:51He's wide open for a left hook.
03:52He's a mug at the game.
03:53If that doesn't work, give him some stick in the orchestras.
04:02What are you doing?
04:04What are you doing?
04:06Well, don't just lay there.
04:07You okay, Tom?
04:08Oh, she's okay.
04:09He slipped, didn't he?
04:18Go on, my son.
04:19Make him have it.
04:20Hey, hey, hey, hey, what'd I tell you?
04:22What'd I tell you?
04:23Do shut up, Arthur, will you?
04:25Go on, do him in the orchestras, Terry.
04:28Snap him!
04:34What are you doing?
04:37I'm embarrassed.
04:39People are watching this, you know.
04:40He's not doing any favours for my image.
04:43Are you all right, son?
04:43All right, all right.
04:44Of course he's all right.
04:45He should think himself lucky that my man has not quite recovered from a severe attack
04:49of pulmonarine pneumonia, complicated by gastroenteritis.
04:53For God's sake, Arthur, give it a rest, will you?
04:56Come here, let's have a look at you.
04:59Yeah, she'll live.
05:00That'll do you for the day.
05:01Anyway, go and get changed, son, go on.
05:08What's the matter?
05:09Are you drunk or something?
05:11Just leave it out, Arthur.
05:16It's a different one of the cobbles, innit?
05:19In here, they've got a thing called the Queensbury Rules.
05:21Rules, rules are made to be broken, my boy.
05:24You could have done him.
05:26Yeah, of course I could.
05:27Anyway, I've got you a bit of work.
05:30Doing what?
05:31Driving.
05:32Well, minicabin.
05:35Arthur, if I wanted to do minicabin, I could have done it without your help
05:39and without giving you any of my hard hurt.
05:42I'm going to have a shower.
05:44Hear me out, Terry.
05:45Hear me out.
05:48Accidents?
05:49Sabotage, more likely, Terry.
05:51I know it's a competitive game, minicabin,
05:53but eight drivers we've lost in the last fortnight
05:56and that is well above the norm.
05:57Stand on me.
05:59What sort of accidents?
06:01Motors breaking down.
06:02One even mysteriously caught fire.
06:04Calling the old bill.
06:05Ah, ah, well, no, no, that would cause a bit of a problem.
06:09Oh?
06:10Yeah, you know how it is.
06:12No?
06:14Well, in a word, tax.
06:17Pardon?
06:19Inland revenue, they crucify everybody these days.
06:22Questions like, how much do you earn?
06:24No cabbie wants that kind of aggro.
06:26They just turn it in and they go somewhere else.
06:28Yeah, and the authorities taking too close a look
06:30into your, er, bookkeeping
06:32wouldn't be too welcome, would they?
06:34I don't think I'm getting through to you, Terry.
06:36Someone is having a pop at me
06:38and that is not in order.
06:41Not in here.
06:46And you get to keep whatever you take in fares.
06:49In that?
06:51What's wrong with it?
06:52What's right with it?
06:53I'm not driving around in that.
06:56Des, tell him what a terrific piece of machinery that is.
07:04Don't be deceived by appearances, Terry.
07:07That engine is tuned to perfection.
07:10Perfection.
07:12Cut to crap, Des.
07:13Terry, I can tell you this because I know your sound.
07:17But that engine was relied on by a certain little firm
07:20to get them off the scene of some very heavy tickles.
07:23Lively, you know what I mean?
07:25Oh.
07:26So you expect me to drive around in a motor that's been used?
07:29Not the body, you loon.
07:31Not the body.
07:32He's talking about the engine.
07:33The body it came out of has been, er,
07:37recycled.
07:38What you might call my small contribution
07:40to our ailing steel industry.
07:43Look at those tyres, Terry.
07:45100%.
07:45Is it M.O.T.?
07:48I'll write one out for you.
07:50What about insurance?
07:51I have a pal who does a nice lining cover notes.
07:57Look, why can't I have one of them?
07:58Leave off, Terry.
08:00They're movable stock.
08:02Those I can sell.
08:07Terrific, isn't it?
08:24Don't lynch into Kevin, what you're up to, all right?
08:26Kevin?
08:27Yeah, he's my partner.
08:28He runs the office.
08:28Just don't lynch it.
08:29Why not?
08:31Well, he's a family man.
08:34Warrior, you know.
08:34Good as gold, but not all that bright.
08:36Lacks a certain vision.
08:38Take my point?
08:39Not really.
08:41Come on.
08:47Oh, that's nice, isn't it?
08:49A touch of the old world charm.
08:50We aim to please.
08:51Lovely.
09:00You're not serious.
09:01Of course.
09:02We need drivers, don't we?
09:04I thought we advertise luxury saloon cars.
09:07Well, so what?
09:09You don't believe that people really drink martini and fly in balloons, do you?
09:14What's that got to do with it?
09:15See what I mean?
09:17Advertising, it's all a con, isn't it?
09:19It's an illusion.
09:21People don't expect plush motors to waft up to their door.
09:24As long as it keeps out the wind and the wet and gets them where they want to go, do
09:27they complain?
09:28No, Arthur.
09:29We're not that desperate.
09:31I think he's right, Arthur.
09:34As a major shareholder in this little enterprise, Kevin,
09:37I think I'm entitled to make a few management suggestions.
09:40You're a silent, non-working partner.
09:43Very silent.
09:45Nevertheless, I promised a job to my nephew here,
09:49and my word is my bond.
09:56All right, Cubby, hang a left, and it's just down here on your right.
09:58Look, if you tell me exactly where you want to go, I'm sure I can find it.
10:02Don't worry.
10:03We're nearly there.
10:04I'm not exactly sure myself till I see it.
10:09Does he know the matter?
10:11Would I stick him in if he didn't?
10:13Probably.
10:15Told you what the rent is, is he?
10:17Rent?
10:20You pay 25 quid a week for the use of the office and facilities, and it's up front.
10:26Hold on now.
10:27I'll lend it to you.
10:29Lend?
10:30Well, he'd make more than that in a day, won't he?
10:32How'd you get a radio thrown in, too?
10:34Can you get Luxembourg on it, uncle?
10:38It's only on loan, mind.
10:40Those things are worth 300 quid apiece, which is about six times the value of the records going into.
10:45Kevin!
10:46Talking to Brux.
10:47Hello, love!
10:49Kevin, you old sod.
10:51Who's having the pleasure of taking old Katie home today, then, eh?
10:57Who?
10:59Where's that nice young man?
11:02What's his name?
11:04Barry.
11:05Oh, I like him.
11:10Just found this next corner and pull-in, cabbie.
11:22What do we owe you, then?
11:23Uh, that'll be £1.60, please.
11:27You'd better pay the man, then, Greg, hadn't you?
11:30Oi!
11:31Right, come on, come on.
11:32Come on, you old pest.
11:33On your feet.
11:34Come on.
11:34I was a daisy.
11:35Oh, come on up.
11:36That's disgusting.
11:37There you go.
11:40Don't you go making a pass of me, young man.
11:43I'm a respectable woman.
11:45I'm sorry, love.
11:46It's just I find you totally irresistible.
11:48Well, you can escort Madame home, then.
11:50Oh, thank you, squire.
11:52Oh, all right, then.
11:53Just to the car.
11:54Come on.
11:54Just to the car.
11:57Come on, Katie.
11:59Where the fresh air gets up.
12:02This one, love.
12:03Yeah, little drunk.
12:06Oh, all right, all right.
12:07In you go, love.
12:08Mind your head, mind your head.
12:10Mind your head.
12:12All right, you in love?
12:13That's it.
12:14Oh, thanks, mate.
12:15Mother told her to get on her bike.
12:17Oh, it's a fair.
12:18All part of the game, innit?
12:19Katie's all right.
12:20She's not normally this bad.
12:21You want to see some of them you get?
12:23Yeah.
12:24Oh, don't.
12:25Perhaps we ought to try for a better class clientele.
12:29Yeah, listen, look.
12:30Get some new cards printed, embossed gold lettering,
12:33and shove them through the letterboxes of your Kensington and Chelsea mansions.
12:37You know, move up market.
12:38Oh, yes.
12:39I'm sure the average upper-class matrim would just love to be picked up by your nephew's pigsty on wheels.
12:45Arthur.
12:45Any camps?
12:46Come in.
12:48Yes, sir?
12:48Where to, sir?
12:49I've had seconds.
12:49I'm not going to do it.
12:50No, look.
12:50Don't give me any aggro, Terry.
12:51Just give it a chance.
12:53Do you see the state of her?
12:54If you think I'm going to spend my time riding around with legless old biddies like that,
12:58just on the off chance that something might happen, you've got another thing.
13:00Hang on, hang on.
13:01Kevin, I'm hurt.
13:03Who is that?
13:04Use your code.
13:05Over.
13:06This is Barry.
13:08Tango 14.
13:09I need someone to help me.
13:11Roger T14.
13:12What's happened?
13:13Over.
13:14A couple of hooligans.
13:15Please send someone.
13:17I'm in Bishop's Lane.
13:19Barry?
13:20Tango 14.
13:22Come in, Tango 14.
13:24Over.
13:24Where are you tables?
13:25Bishop's Lane.
13:26Come on.
13:27Well, come on.
13:28Where are you going?
13:29Where are you going?
13:43Bloody hell.
13:47Don't worry, son.
13:49We'll get you to a hospital.
13:52There you are, Terry.
13:53Not nearly as bad as we first thought.
13:55A couple of days will be as right as rain.
13:57Luckily, they didn't touch your motor.
13:59Yeah, where is it?
13:59In the car park.
14:00Terry here drove it over.
14:02He's a relation of mine.
14:05Thanks, mate.
14:05You just joined the firm.
14:07You'll get on well with him.
14:08Listen, Arthur, maybe the man doesn't want to carry on, Cabby.
14:10Of course he does, don't you, son?
14:12I don't know.
14:13I'll have to think about it.
14:14What's to think about?
14:15Anyone get assaulted these days?
14:17It's all his urban decay.
14:20Do what?
14:21Oh, vandals, muggers.
14:22It's rife, isn't it?
14:23It's not only the cabbies who cop it, you know.
14:28Well, they were cleaning you up, I phoned the office.
14:31Kevin tells me you picked the fare up from a pub.
14:33Yeah.
14:33How many?
14:34One, two?
14:35Two.
14:36What do they look like?
14:37A couple of flash young tearaways.
14:39Aren't they all much the same?
14:41Yeah.
14:42I suppose you don't want to call in the old bill.
14:44No, no, no.
14:45Of course not.
14:46It's what we pay our taxes for, isn't it?
14:48Police protection against urligans.
14:51Say no notice of him, Barry.
14:52He knows the SP.
14:53He's winding us up.
14:56Come on, I'll drive you home.
14:57No, it's all right.
14:57I can manage.
14:58No, don't be silly.
14:58Sit in.
14:59Go on.
15:00OK, cheers.
15:05You know how to comfort the injured, don't you?
15:07There's no point in losing another driver till I have to, is there?
15:11Where are you going?
15:12Back to the office.
15:14Make sure you'll get a radio stuck in your motor.
15:17Now, listen, uncle.
15:18I haven't decided whether I'm going to do it or not.
15:22That's funny.
15:23I thought you already were.
15:31Yeah, right, OK.
15:34Well?
15:35I think he's getting a bit bodily.
15:37Says we'll wheeze up on the spankings.
15:39But that's the bit I like most.
15:40Yeah, well, you would.
15:42Anyway, the message is leave it out and the motors for now.
15:45Why?
15:45I don't know.
15:47He'll be less when he wants us to perform again.
15:54Well, there must be some of you remember.
15:57Colour of their hair, clothes, boils on the end of their nose.
16:01Boils?
16:02Well, yeah.
16:04Distinguishing marks.
16:05Look, why are you so interested?
16:07If I know who they are, I can avoid them, right?
16:09I'm new to this game.
16:11I don't want to cop for what you've got.
16:13Oh, it happens now and then.
16:15I've had a few runners.
16:16Oh, yeah, runners?
16:17Who play you with a knuckle sandwich before they have it on their toes.
16:20Go for you, go off the carriage.
16:22They know where I live.
16:24How's that?
16:25I don't know, but they said, well, if I try to get them nicked, they'd pay me another visit.
16:31Did they say anything else?
16:32Something about maybe I should stop driving a cab?
16:36They didn't specify a candy cab, Zoe.
16:38No.
16:39Well, why should they?
16:41I don't know.
16:42But maybe you should take their advice.
16:53If I give up cab driving, how else am I supposed to get my family out of this dump?
16:58Yeah, I see your point.
17:00Oh, come on.
17:00There are lots of other driving jobs.
17:02Yeah, but on them you have to pay tax.
17:04I pay enough tax that it isn't my regular job.
17:07You mean to say you've got a kosher job as well?
17:11I work nights in a bakery.
17:12I sleep in the mornings and I do this in the afternoon and evenings.
17:17You must lead a really exciting social life.
17:19I got married when I was 19.
17:22I've got two kids and three rooms in that car seat.
17:26I'm not eligible for a council place, so we've got to buy.
17:29First-time buyers.
17:30Now, I don't have to tell you the price of property.
17:32Zero three, roger.
17:33My wife's on the edge of a nervous breakdown living around here.
17:37Will you tell me how else I'm supposed to get the money?
17:41Don't know.
17:43Could rob a bank.
17:45Or get yourself a job in the mornings.
17:47Now, hold on.
17:48Listen.
17:49Are you sure you don't remember anything about those two geezers?
17:52Well, one of them did mention the other's first name.
17:56Greg?
17:57Yeah, that's what he said.
17:59All right?
18:03No, no juice.
18:05Try the battery connections.
18:09Perhaps you'd better pop into that pub where you picked them up.
18:11Now, I'm not open yet.
18:12Well, later.
18:15Okay.
18:16Try that.
18:18Yep, that's it.
18:20All right?
18:22Well, the radio is.
18:23Dave, I'll show you what it's all about.
18:25Trying to write today.
18:26Can I have a word, Arthur?
18:27Yeah, sure.
18:28See you in a minute, Terry.
18:31Do you know, I've been thinking, Arthur.
18:33I'll keep practising.
18:33It'll get to be easier.
18:34No, no.
18:35Seriously.
18:36The more I think about it, the more I'll be in it to think it isn't worth it.
18:41What isn't?
18:42This.
18:44But let's face it.
18:45It's only giving one of us a living.
18:46This is the on and off switch.
18:48This is a squelch knob.
18:50Cuts out static and interference.
18:52This is for volume.
18:54This is for channel one and two.
18:57This is to receive.
18:59And this is to send.
19:02It's as simple as that.
19:04Hmm?
19:05Could you go over it once more for us, please?
19:08I don't understand you, Kevin.
19:10Here you are, your own boss.
19:12Men under your command.
19:13An independent spirit in this increasingly bolshy country of ours.
19:17Oh, don't talk garbage, Arthur.
19:19I'm a beaten slave to this business.
19:20I work 16 hours a day.
19:22Dustman takes home more than I do.
19:24Puts in half the time.
19:26Even drivers earn more on me.
19:30Yeah.
19:31Maybe we ought to raise the rent.
19:33But we already charge more than most firms.
19:36That's why we have trouble getting drivers.
19:40Candy cabs.
19:42Yes, what's the address, sir?
19:44Very good, sir.
19:45On its way.
19:48Charlie.
19:4912 Hall Road.
19:51Going to Oxford Street.
19:54Look, Kevin, I can understand you getting depressed.
19:57I'm depressed.
19:58But things are going to get better.
20:00I'm working on it.
20:01Have a cigar.
20:02No, thanks.
20:04See, the thing is, Kev, I don't see how you can quit.
20:07I mean, all your capital's tied up in the business.
20:09If you leave, you lose a lot.
20:11Yeah, but I wasn't thinking of leaving.
20:13I'm suggesting you pull out.
20:15Me?
20:16Why should I pull out?
20:18Well, for one thing, you've got plenty of income for all your other interests.
20:21This is all I've got.
20:23Yeah, and you wouldn't have this if I hadn't stuck up to 60% of the capital.
20:26Yeah, and I do 100% of the work.
20:28Oh, be fair, Kevin.
20:29I handle the promotional side.
20:31You pay for the cards to be printed.
20:34I find this ingratitude very hard to bear, Kevin.
20:37You're incredible.
20:39Well, I suppose we could come to some arrangement, depending on what you're offering.
20:46Well, I was thinking of giving you back your original five grand.
20:51Where would you dig five grand up from?
20:54Borrow it.
20:56Well, the wife's parents got a few quid tucked away.
20:59I'll just have to pay it back best I could.
21:01Nah, sorry.
21:02I couldn't begin to consider releasing my share at under, say, eight grand.
21:06Eight?
21:06Well, ten would be more realistic, but then I always err on the side of generosity.
21:14Anyone want a cab?
21:16Your code is Tango 6-4.
21:20Tango 6-4.
21:21Always use it when communicating with base, which is here, which is Control 1.
21:26Roger, or ROG for short, means message understood.
21:29ROG?
21:31Roger.
21:32No swearing or foul language over the air.
21:34We can get done for that.
21:35That P.O.B. means passenger on board.
21:37So when you pick up a punter, you call in Tango 6-4 P.O.B., ROG?
21:42Er, P.O.B., ROG.
21:44If you get lost, call in, ask for a direct, or use your book.
21:49Book?
21:50Hater's head.
21:51I ain't got one.
21:52Or buy one.
21:54I ain't got one.
22:06Give me, baby.
22:12Ok.
22:13Come on.
22:14I've got one.
22:14Bye-bye.
22:14Bye-bye.
22:14Bye-bye.
22:15Bye-bye.
22:15Bye-bye.
22:16Bye-bye.
22:19Bye-bye.
22:21Bye-bye.
22:28Here we are.
22:31Can you just put them in there for me, please?
22:33Certainly.
22:36There.
22:37Sir, two eighty.
22:39Two eighty.
22:41Thank you very much.
22:42Bye.
22:43Shut up.
22:49One, two, fifty.
22:53Eight, eight.
22:55Ten.
23:06Your car, sir.
23:10No, it's not actually mine.
23:14It belongs to Candy Cab's.
23:16After daily.
23:18Tango 64's RTP'd.
23:25How's it going then, sir?
23:26Getting used to it?
23:28I'll never get used to this.
23:30You will.
23:31You know, that bleeding motor of mine uses more oil than petrol.
23:35The state of it, I thought it ran in steam.
23:38Yeah, mine.
23:39We should have seen some of the punter's eye today.
23:42Dave here was telling me about Barry.
23:45The driver who got beaten up.
23:47Oh, yeah.
23:48Bad, was he?
23:50Well, I didn't look too clever.
23:51No, it'd be all right.
23:52Just lumps and bruises.
23:54No, that's too much that sort of thing going on.
23:56What, round here, you mean?
23:57Well, everywhere.
23:59He's the third on this film in the last couple of weeks.
24:02Did they know who did it?
24:03Don't know.
24:05They just rang in and said they weren't coming back to work.
24:08You've been done.
24:10A couple of dummy runs, that's all.
24:11But Dave, you had a pound of sugar put in his tank a few days back.
24:15Sweet, isn't it?
24:18Luckily enough, I managed to borrow a motor.
24:20I'd been out of work.
24:23Perhaps one of the drivers stitched somebody up,
24:25and they got the hump with the firm.
24:27How do you mean?
24:28Well, I overcharged them or something.
24:30Oh, come off it, man.
24:31What can you overcharge?
24:33A pound, thirty-five?
24:34Oh, you've got to be nutters to go to that length.
24:37Hey, to Rigby Road, usual destination.
24:41Er, look, me and John were just about to go and have something to eat.
24:45Er, let Terry take it.
24:47Yeah, let Terry take it.
24:54Candy caps?
24:55One minute.
25:09You're new, ain't ya?
25:11Oh, no, I've been around for a few years.
25:12Oh, I can see that.
25:13Now I'm met with candy caps.
25:15Oh, yeah, we're there, Mum, as fresh as a wilted daisy.
25:25Right, where to, love?
25:27Oh, didn't they tell you?
25:28I do this trip every day by Sunday.
25:30Kind of confession, then, do you?
25:32Oddly.
25:32I work at the Lotus Club, up west.
25:35What, a strip joint?
25:37Do artistic poses?
25:39Yeah, I bet you do.
25:42So that's where we're going, then, is it?
25:44The Lotus Club?
25:45Oh, back entrance, of course.
25:46Of course, the back entrance.
25:53Tango 64, P.O.B.
25:56Arch Tango 64, message for you.
25:58Arthur rang, said, can you meet him in the pub?
26:01What pub?
26:03You said you'd know which one.
26:06Roger, Rog.
26:33Right, that's, er, two pounds forty.
26:37Call me Debbie.
26:39All right, Debbie.
26:40It's two pounds forty.
26:54Here?
26:56Disgusting.
26:58What's disgusting about it?
27:00You mean you obliged it?
27:02In broad daylight?
27:03In the car?
27:05In the street?
27:06No, not in the street.
27:07In the courtyard round the back of the club.
27:10Outrageous.
27:12It would have been if I had.
27:15Oh.
27:16You didn't, then?
27:19I will.
27:20I've got his number.
27:22Hey, look, Terry, I don't pay you good money to take up with slags.
27:25You don't pay me period, Arthur.
27:28Gratitude.
27:29You know, let's have it right.
27:30You are copying a nice few quid in fares.
27:33Copying what?
27:35Do you know how much I've earned?
27:37Driving that bleeding cab, in the traffic, sweating, carrying bags about eighteen quid.
27:43Yeah, and seven quid went out on petrol and oil.
27:46Well, that wreck drinks it.
27:49And I got a parking ticket.
27:51Well, look, just give it time, Terry.
27:53Look, you've only been doing it for eight hours, not even that.
27:55And you're already eleven sobs in pocket.
27:58Only another fourteen, you'll be able to repay the rent money I paid out on your behalf.
28:02Do what?
28:05I'm only joking.
28:07No, no, that could wait.
28:10Wait!
28:11Oh, no, don't.
28:12Don't.
28:14I've been a bit busy meself.
28:17Banking other people's money.
28:19I've been making a few inquiries about our two hooligans.
28:23Discreet conversation with the barman.
28:27And...
28:28See those two over there.
28:33One on the road's name is Greg.
28:41They were laughing and joking the other night, having a drink up and talking about a car that caught fire.
28:46The barman reckons he heard the words minicab mentioned.
28:53Hey, Hench, aren't you going to ask them to help you with your inquiries?
28:58No, Arthur, not in here.
29:00Don't want to upset the barman after it's been so nice to you, do you?
29:08Um, perhaps I'd better wait in the car.
29:11What for?
29:13Um, well, then I'd be ready to follow them if they jump into a motor.
29:17Oh, I see, Arthur, yeah.
29:19Yeah, well, we've got to be prepared, haven't we?
29:20Well, of course we have.
29:21Go on, right then.
29:25And if they start performing, don't worry, I'll be out of the motor in a flash.
29:30Of course you will, Arthur.
29:44See you later.
29:52Excuse me, Jets. Can I have a word?
29:55You're Greg, aren't you?
29:56That's right.
29:57What's your name again?
29:58Who's asking?
29:59You met a friend of mine.
30:01Oh, yeah, who's that?
30:02He drives a minicab.
30:04He drives for candy cabs.
30:07You see, this morning, two buttless bastards gave him a good hiding.
30:10So I thought I ought to talk to you two about it.
30:13I think you ought to be careful what you say, mate.
30:15There's a kick in the cobblers off on the fence.
30:17Know what I mean?
30:25Arthur, you look after this one.
30:27You look after this one.
30:39There's a kick in the building.
30:40You look after this one.
30:44There you go.
30:44Oh, no.
30:47You look after this one.
30:48Turn the car.
30:48I was in a blight.
30:48You look after this one.
30:49And he was in a blight.
30:49These are the ones.
30:50And he's in the car.
30:50We're down.
31:02Is this one of them?
31:05No.
31:08I've never seen him before.
31:11About a bloody time, too.
31:13Oh, good morning to you and all.
31:14Have you had a look out your window?
31:16Well, no, I've been a bit busy.
31:19What with?
31:22Uh, yeah, Debbie, this is Arthur.
31:25Hello, Arthur.
31:26Charming.
31:27No wonder you didn't notice my property being dismantled in the street.
31:32What are you on about?
31:35Take a look.
31:44Someone's nicked the wheels.
31:46Well, obviously.
31:48Oh, my good God.
31:51She does artistic poses.
32:05Hold on.
32:06Hold on.
32:08It's one of my wheels.
32:10Oh, I wouldn't know a thing about that.
32:13You're going to try and sell me me own wheels?
32:15I don't know what you're talking about.
32:17I freely admit I bought them only this morning.
32:20But I know you'll believe me, Terry, when I tell you I have no idea where they came from.
32:29He's only trying to sell me my own wheels.
32:31You should have kept your eye on the motor.
32:33This is a very rough neighbourhood round here.
32:35Now, look, the main thing is to get you back on the road.
32:38Now, look, Barry didn't recognise that kid, eh?
32:41Who?
32:42Barry.
32:43Barry, I don't...
32:44Oh, no, no, it didn't.
32:47No, I was thinking he, er...
32:49I think he was a bit frightened of the comebacks.
32:51Can't blame him, really, can you?
32:53I phoned the other two drivers who got done.
32:54They didn't want to know either.
32:56And they probably got the same message.
32:58Yeah.
32:59What I don't understand is how they know their home addresses.
33:02They probably just follow them home as a sort of insurance.
33:07So what now?
33:08Well, keep punting, keep punting.
33:09With any luck, those two hooligans will try a comeback on you.
33:12Oh, thanks, Arthur.
33:13Yeah, and if they do, you'll be at liberty to use all your natural talents
33:16to make them divulge what it's all about, won't you?
33:18Take it from me.
33:19They are only the labourers.
33:24Who's paying for these wills?
33:26You pay for them.
33:27Oh, your tips.
33:29Yeah, yeah, I think fine.
33:33Well?
33:35Turns out this goose is working on the firm.
33:37He's only been with him a couple of days.
33:39And?
33:40He wants us to sort him out.
33:43Oh, yeah.
33:44You can count me out.
33:45That gig is a bit too useful.
33:48Yeah.
33:49Still, we could have a bit of a gig of Woody's motor, eh?
33:54Now, I'm sorry, madam.
33:55There's nothing whatever available for at least 20 minutes.
33:59Okay.
34:01Tell me about it.
34:03No, no, I've gone out on the job.
34:05Can you tell me about his wills?
34:06Yeah.
34:07Best thing on the car and they get nicked.
34:11Anything else be like me?
34:12No, apart from the fact that only nine drivers have turned up so far,
34:16and I'm turning away customers.
34:17And the 28, all built in DK mode, Roger.
34:20Roger, 28, mate, 14 Napier Street, going to Barnes.
34:24Roger.
34:29Candycabs.
34:30No, sorry, there's nothing here at the moment, but it shouldn't be more than a few...
34:34ignorant son.
34:36Been like this all morning.
34:38I've got a blinded earl ache.
34:40I'll make you a nice cup of tea.
34:45Arthur?
34:46You thought any more about my Arthur?
34:49Five grand?
34:50Uh, sorry.
34:52Couldn't begin to consider it.
34:53Well, I suppose I could go to six.
34:55No, I'm sorry.
34:56I'm not interested.
34:59Piss off!
35:01Was that the punter?
35:03Probably.
35:04What's the matter with you?
35:05Aren't things bad enough without you insulting the punters?
35:07I told you, I've got this blinded earl ache.
35:10And quite frankly, Arthur, I'm sick and tired of working 16 hours a day to line your bloody pocket.
35:14Here, I'll tell you what.
35:16You have a taste of it.
35:17I'm going home.
35:21Tango 1-9.
35:22Here, a chap, it's most dear.
35:23Who is that?
35:24What?
35:26Tango who?
35:27Tango 1-2.
35:29Heathrow.
35:30P.O.B.
35:31P.O.B.?
35:32What does that mean?
35:35County cabs?
35:38County cabs?
35:39Tango 1-8.
35:40Mobile, Shepherds Bushصhie.
35:41What?
35:42No, no, no, not what you.
35:43What?
35:44Oh, you want to go to Acton?
35:46No, you're in Acton.
35:49W-w-w-wait a minute.
35:50Wait, wait a minute.
35:52Look, not all at once.
35:54Oh, bloody hell.
35:55Arthur?
35:56It's me, Terry.
35:58Arthur?
36:02County cabs?
36:03Tango 1-4.
36:04Can you give me a direct...
36:05Shut up.
36:06Don't do that, of course.
36:08You can't find it on the board.
36:12Up, yours too.
36:13Come on, straight out of the air, Kevin.
36:17I'm sorry about that.
36:18Hello?
36:19Hello?
36:19Dinger 1-8 Mobile, Holland Park Avenue.
36:22What the bloody hell does that mean?
36:25I can roll 1-4.
36:27Direct, please, to Crescent of Muse.
36:48Arthur, what's happening?
36:50I don't want to discuss it.
36:51It has a disturbing nightmare quality.
36:55Yeah?
36:55Why are all the phones off to yuck?
36:57Because they keep ringing, Terry.
36:59They keep ringing.
37:01That's the idea, isn't it?
37:06Where's Kevin?
37:07Don't ask me to talk about adding great.
37:09After all I've done for him,
37:11helping to set him up in business,
37:13letting him run the place,
37:14giving him more than his fair share of the profits.
37:17Where's he gone?
37:18He's gone home.
37:20With, he claimed, a headache.
37:23Left me with one.
37:24What about all the other drivers?
37:25I don't know.
37:26I suppose they've gone home too.
37:30I want to go home.
37:32Oh, God.
37:37I want a cigarette.
37:39You got a cigarette, young man?
37:42Sorry, I don't smoke.
37:43I want a cigarette.
37:46Stop the car!
37:48No, I'll tell you what,
37:49there's a shop around the corner.
37:50We'll stop there, all right?
37:54Yeah.
37:59But you stay in the car.
38:00Oh, thank you, young man.
38:04You're very kind.
38:06Very kind.
38:08Very kind.
38:08And I'll give you five.
38:19Hey.
38:20Hey.
38:29Hey.
38:33Hey.
38:34Hey.
38:35Hey.
38:36Hey.
38:37Hey.
38:38Oh.
38:53Hurry!
38:53Wally!
38:54Hurry!
38:55Hurry!
39:16Hurry!
39:17Hey!
39:41are you all right love all right all right i should bloody well say i'm not all right
39:47yeah but you're not her are you where's my cigarettes i dropped them i'm afraid while
39:53i was chasing this who's this then this is one of the gentlemen responsible for your little joyride
40:00joyride yeah him another big brave thing took the handbrake off didn't they
40:05where were you then i was getting your cigarettes i gave you a pound
40:15one pound that's the last time i used this firm good little hooligan oi drunken old bat
40:22yeah but later on she'll be sober and you'll still be in trouble now sit down i want to chat
40:41didn't think you'd still be here oh why is that kevin well i thought you'd have had enough
40:46yesterday yeah i must admit it did get a bit hectic yeah well now you know what it's like
40:53not easy is it no no no i i think you made your point yeah
41:00i'm going to reconsider your offer you are oh well that's great arthur i think we could
41:09come to some arrangement in view of uh recent developments i think developments that's a
41:17key word i think don't you no it's got to be got to be
41:24what's all this then oh we're not open for business today in view of these uh developments
41:29i thought i'd call a meeting of the board i.e. you and me oh terry's here in what you
41:35might
41:35call a supportive role oh yeah yeah before we go into the details i think it might be instructive
41:43for you to have a look at something talents i've got this from the planning department in the town hall
41:55interesting isn't it what is it well this is what they call in the trade a blueprint
42:01it's a blueprint of a new shopping precinct yeah well it's all very interesting
42:07what's it got to do with this meeting lovely isn't it terrific come here i'll show you see that
42:14that's a car park there's your bank shops various and here where candy cabs now stands a supermarket
42:25no i'm not with you you're bloody right you're not with me you thought you could cheat me by
42:30hiring those hooligans to put the frighteners on the drivers run the business into the ground
42:34and buy me out cheap then bingo make a bundle out of selling the freehold of this place but you
42:38forgot to take into account my deep-rooted instinct for knowing when i'm getting turned over
42:47yeah all right so you've found out but as you has been turning me over all this time
42:54anyway you're forgetting something i still own 40 percent of the business
43:00true and in view of your legal position that is incitement to gbh arson conspiracy to defraud
43:09i have decided to make you a very generous offer for your share two thousand pounds
43:14two thousand now wait a minute arthur one then
43:22you can't do this it's robbery no kevin hitting old ladies over the head and taking their handbags
43:29everything else is robbery everything else is business
43:34yeah but arthur i haven't got anything out of this yes you have my boy what
43:42yours to keep that 22 23 24 25
43:5325 quid it's worth more than that for scrap
44:03terry it is scrap you're lucky to have a mate like me to take it off your hands
44:09but we bought it off you in the first place
44:11yeah but it's been used as a minicab since then and been in a pile up
44:15you ought to be paying me to take it away
44:20yeah well thanks a bunch pal
44:22for a friend anytime
44:45you're making a wonderful investment here mr king
44:47you see under government law the government insists you have to buy the car in order to get the number
44:53so you're not just getting your own personalized number plate with your own exact initials
44:57you're also getting a wonderful little runabout for the wife as well
45:02not bad for 250 quid
45:04not bad at all des
45:07125 each eh
45:12have you met my partner
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