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  • 2 hours ago
Gary Of The Pacific 2017
Transcript
00:00:41Dauphin!
00:00:42Oh shucks!
00:00:46And your shoulders is what you want?
00:00:49Yeah.
00:00:51Hey Dad!
00:00:52Lani!
00:00:52There's a dauphin!
00:00:53Come quick!
00:00:54I mean, he is going to be chief.
00:00:57It makes sense.
00:01:00You'll call Princess.
00:01:02Yeah, he'll be the best for everyone.
00:01:04Here.
00:01:12Ah!
00:01:26Put the TV back.
00:01:28It doesn't belong to you.
00:01:31Here's the plane ticket.
00:01:32Oh yeah, me.
00:01:33Here's some bottle modes for the flight.
00:01:35Yeah, thanks Dad.
00:01:37And they'll cover your university costs.
00:01:41Oh shucks.
00:01:43Check out all this money.
00:01:45Yeah.
00:01:46Everybody on the island sacrificed a lot.
00:01:49Check out all this money man.
00:01:50I'm so rich man.
00:01:51I'm riches!
00:01:52Yeah, just remember.
00:01:54That's everybody's savings.
00:01:56Hey everybody, check out my money.
00:01:58I'm riches!
00:02:04I want to come back in three years and be the best chief as I've ever seen.
00:02:08Way better than you Dad.
00:02:11Woohoo!
00:02:12Oh hey Brent, this one's for you.
00:02:14Hey!
00:02:15Don't tip the driver!
00:02:17Woohoo!
00:02:19Woohoo!
00:02:21Woohoo!
00:02:22Woohoo!
00:02:23Woohoo!
00:02:23Woohoo!
00:02:24I was going to come back in three years.
00:02:27This semester we'll separate the wheat from the chaff.
00:02:31You want to be the wheat.
00:02:33Wheat goes on summer holidays.
00:02:35Chaff goes to summer school.
00:02:37Welcome to summer school.
00:02:38This is your last chance, so if you don't do well here...
00:02:41Being on the benefits, nothing to be ashamed about, okay?
00:02:43I might not have got a degree, but I still thought I could make it big.
00:02:47Um, maybe you need to set your sights just a little lower.
00:02:51Um, hockey and main chicken, uh, beef.
00:02:54How's my brainiac and his flash degree?
00:02:57Yeah good Dad, you need real easy.
00:02:59I didn't like lying to Dad, but I didn't want to go home a failure, so I worked my way
00:03:04through various industries.
00:03:06The toilet industry, the advertising industry, the appliance door industry, and there it was, my calling.
00:03:16The Property Investment College for Excellence will not give you a job, it'll give you a career, and it's 100
00:03:23% legal.
00:03:24Take no prisoners, show no weakness.
00:03:27To be successful, project success always.
00:03:31It's the watch on your wrist, it's the car in your driveway, it's the woman in your bed.
00:03:37Preferably someone foreign, project success always!
00:03:41Project success always!
00:03:44Project success always!
00:03:45Project success always!
00:03:48Hey Gary, you coming home soon?
00:03:50Uh, nah, nah, not yet.
00:03:52Now I've just got a few more things to take off my list.
00:03:55Yeah, that's alright, you...
00:03:57You tick them off eh?
00:03:58What are the things that I could do?
00:04:01I need to take off my list.
00:04:01But, at least, go away.
00:04:07There are things that made me.
00:04:08Try the cinema time.
00:04:13Okay?
00:04:13Project success always.
00:04:33Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
00:05:07You still haven't told me where we're going.
00:05:11We're going somewhere really, really special.
00:05:15Oh, one thing I'd say is bring your appetite.
00:05:19Sorry, the food's a little cold out, but the flavor's really marinated, isn't it?
00:05:24It is a lot of flavor first thing in the morning.
00:05:31Oh, no.
00:05:33I wonder what that could be.
00:05:37That's a plane.
00:05:38Yeah, a bit weird, though.
00:05:39What's a plane doing all the way out here?
00:05:41I'm pretty sure it's not a commercial flight path.
00:05:44And it's carrying a message.
00:05:53Oh, no.
00:05:55That's not what...
00:05:56It was supposed to say,
00:05:58will you marry me?
00:06:00Question mark.
00:06:01Gary.
00:06:04Like from Gary.
00:06:08Um.
00:06:13Gary, I like you, and I might love you one day.
00:06:17Oh, thank you.
00:06:18I love that you have goals and how you keep saying you're going to be a millionaire by the time
00:06:22you're 35.
00:06:2337 now, probably.
00:06:25Oh.
00:06:26Okay.
00:06:27But if I'm going to get married, I want the best wedding possible.
00:06:30Like I've dreamed of since I was a little girl.
00:06:33Like Princess Diana.
00:06:35Or Monica from Friends.
00:06:37And I just don't think you can give me that at the moment.
00:06:40I can give you that.
00:06:41I don't know the specific Friends episode, but I can probably watch it online.
00:06:45No, you're missing the point.
00:06:47I want to be treated like a queen.
00:06:49Like a proper queen.
00:06:51Oh, I...
00:06:52Okay.
00:06:53You haven't actually said no.
00:06:56Okay, I'll put you down as a maybe.
00:07:00I think you'll probably feel different after the awards ceremony.
00:07:03I can give you what you want.
00:07:32Another invite to my sister's wedding.
00:07:35Café au lait?
00:07:37Hon?
00:07:38Café au lait?
00:07:40In the café au lait?
00:07:42Hon?
00:07:42Café au lait?
00:07:44Coffee with milk?
00:07:45No, thank you.
00:07:46Yeah.
00:07:53Plain bill.
00:07:55You put that on the bottom of the pile.
00:07:57Didn't work, did it?
00:08:00Oh.
00:08:01The thing tonight.
00:08:04I don't feel like I should just go.
00:08:06Yeah, you sort of have to come.
00:08:07Um, uh, it's a work function and you're an employee.
00:08:10And I'd really like you there in an intimate capacity.
00:08:14You want girlfriend.
00:08:16That's what girlfriends do.
00:08:19Yeah, okay.
00:08:20Besides, I'm nominated for the gong.
00:08:23Self-nominated.
00:08:24Still cunts.
00:08:33Huh?
00:08:35Yeah, we like it.
00:08:36We just don't love it.
00:08:38Love it?
00:08:39It's brick.
00:08:41Brick is solid.
00:08:43It doesn't get any better than brick.
00:08:45Look, I bought this place for a bargain, which means you guys get it for a bargain.
00:08:49Huh?
00:08:49Wait, you own the place?
00:08:51Yeah.
00:08:51I'm a real estate agent.
00:08:53That's what real estate agents do.
00:08:54I don't know if that's it.
00:08:55I mean, a lot of people would be scared off because of its history, because it's the Hayward
00:08:59House.
00:09:00But I know you guys are savvy investors, like me.
00:09:03Yes, I've done all the hard work.
00:09:05Cleaned up the mess.
00:09:06Changed out the carpet in the bedroom.
00:09:07And now, it's ready to go.
00:09:09I thought they'd burnt that place down.
00:09:11No, they didn't.
00:09:12They tried.
00:09:13But they could've.
00:09:14That's the thing.
00:09:15It's brick.
00:09:17Have you ever tried lighting a brick on fire?
00:09:19That's another good thing about brick.
00:09:21Hmm.
00:09:22We will have a think about it.
00:09:25Bloody tie kickers.
00:09:27Sorry, what?
00:09:28You know what your problem is?
00:09:29You don't have the money.
00:09:31You just want to be driven around in a sports car by an award-nominated real estate agent
00:09:35and look at sturdy houses you can't afford.
00:09:37What?
00:09:38No, it just doesn't feel...
00:09:40We're kind of looking for somewhere where we can start our family.
00:09:43Weak excuse.
00:09:45I'm getting some petrol money out of you time-wasters.
00:09:49Come on.
00:09:58Award.
00:10:00It's really a testament to...
00:10:02Yes, my skill.
00:10:07Yes, my skill.
00:10:09But also my joie de vivre.
00:10:12Testament to...
00:10:15Yes, my skill.
00:10:17But also...
00:10:18But also...
00:10:20My joie de vivre.
00:10:26Where have you been?
00:10:27Who are you talking to?
00:10:28Ah!
00:10:31Just kidding.
00:10:32I know, Randall.
00:10:33How you going?
00:10:33Good to see you, mate.
00:10:35Thanks for coming along.
00:10:35Appreciate the support.
00:10:37Good to see you.
00:10:38Oh, I would never throttle her for real.
00:10:42I did knee her in the back once, though.
00:10:44Yeah.
00:10:45Yeah.
00:10:45But that was an accident.
00:10:47Yeah, I had a cramp, but it just went.
00:10:49Lack of salt.
00:10:51Salt.
00:10:52The most addictive substance known to man.
00:10:55N-A-C-L.
00:10:57You know your periodic table?
00:10:59No.
00:11:04Hello.
00:11:04Eye to the front, please.
00:11:07Hope you all enjoyed the curry banquet.
00:11:09Time now for our main award.
00:11:11It was a great year in real estate
00:11:14with some incredibly successful agents
00:11:15putting their hands up to be counted
00:11:17as Palmerston North's best.
00:11:20But the accolade can only go to one,
00:11:22so put your hands together for...
00:11:26the real estate agent of the year,
00:11:29Randall Adams.
00:11:30Fuck.
00:11:42Um, wow.
00:11:44Well, this is amazing.
00:11:45I certainly wasn't expecting it.
00:11:47I think, uh,
00:11:48on nights like this,
00:11:49it's really important to remember
00:11:51that we're not just selling houses.
00:11:53We're selling homes.
00:11:55It's not just bricks and mortar.
00:11:57Sometimes we're the boards and stucco, too.
00:11:59LAUGHTER
00:12:01Um, I'd like to take this opportunity
00:12:03to also thank my beautiful girlfriend, Susie.
00:12:06Actually, Susie,
00:12:07can you come up, please?
00:12:08Come on.
00:12:11Give them a little twirl, Sus.
00:12:14Nice.
00:12:14That's my girl.
00:12:21Susie, will you marry me?
00:12:23Yes.
00:12:24Yes, of course.
00:12:26APPLAUSE
00:12:36And now, time for our final lot,
00:12:38and it is a special one.
00:12:40Remember that all proceeds do go
00:12:42to youth suicide prevention.
00:12:44Actually, no, sorry.
00:12:46It was changed.
00:12:48All proceeds go to
00:12:49Palmerston North Boys Rugby Tour to Japan.
00:12:55Oh, my God!
00:12:56She's so cute!
00:13:00There you go.
00:13:01There you go.
00:13:02Five kids, really?
00:13:03There you go.
00:13:05OK, uh, shall we start it off with, uh, 2,000?
00:13:092,000.
00:13:102,000 over here.
00:13:11Any advances on 2,000?
00:13:123,000?
00:13:12Do I hear 3,000?
00:13:132,500.
00:13:142,500?
00:13:142,500?
00:13:14Uh, can I get anything higher than that?
00:13:163,500.
00:13:173,500!
00:13:19A lot of dog for the money, sir.
00:13:20A lot of dog.
00:13:22Uh, do we have any advances on 3,500?
00:13:25$10,000.
00:13:27Sold!
00:13:28Sold!
00:13:28$10,000.
00:13:29Yes.
00:13:30APPLAUSE
00:13:35Hi!
00:13:36Hi!
00:13:41Congratulations.
00:13:43Uh, sorry, we do need to get the payment through before we can release a lot.
00:13:47Oh, it's just, yeah, uh, my funds are just tied up in a property right now.
00:13:52It's brick.
00:13:53Yeah, it's brick, so there's bloody interest.
00:13:55Welcher!
00:13:56Uh, who said that?
00:13:58I'm not a bloody Welcher, mate.
00:14:01Sorry, you do have $10,000, sir, right?
00:14:06Uh...
00:14:07I'm gonna go sit down.
00:14:10Uh...
00:14:11All right.
00:14:13All right.
00:14:14Uh, we'll go back to the underbidder at, uh, 3,500.
00:14:17Any advances on 3,500?
00:14:19Go once.
00:14:20Twice.
00:14:22Sold!
00:14:26Yeah, good job, Mike.
00:14:28Blatch is going to a good home.
00:14:32Ah!
00:14:39I might stay at Jackie's tonight.
00:14:41Yeah, Cole.
00:14:43Yeah, you haven't seen her for a while, so...
00:14:45Yeah, if you leave now, should I take a couple of hours?
00:14:49I might just stay here at knit work.
00:15:15What is that?
00:15:17Are you drunk?
00:15:20No, I'm just drunk because I'm busy, I've got a lot of busy deals going on.
00:15:28Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:15:29But you need to come home?
00:15:30No, no, I need to be here to run my business, I'm not rushing back to a sinking island just
00:15:35because...
00:15:35It's Dad.
00:15:37I've booked you a flight, it leaves in three hours.
00:16:05Let's go see.
00:16:15Woo!
00:16:16Ever thought I'd see you back on Tuesday, Lava?
00:16:19Yeah.
00:16:19So are you like a millionaire now?
00:16:23Uh...
00:16:24Well...
00:16:24Hey.
00:16:26Hey, what?
00:16:27A businessman like yourself does need his luxuries.
00:16:29Can I interest you in some duty-free?
00:16:31Jewellery?
00:16:32A designer cologne?
00:16:34Electronics?
00:16:35A portable CD player with card kits?
00:16:38It's got shop management technology?
00:16:40Nah, I'm fine.
00:16:41Yeah.
00:16:42Yeah, cool, cool.
00:16:43Oh, you don't have to get it now, you can actually get it on your way out.
00:16:45That's the beautiful thing about duty-free.
00:16:47Discounts still the same.
00:16:51Ah, it's good to see you, man.
00:16:53Good to see you too.
00:16:54And, um, sorry about your Dad.
00:16:56Yeah, thanks.
00:16:57Actually, you know what would be a really good present?
00:17:00Oh, no.
00:17:01I'm not gonna buy any European golf.
00:17:05No, okay, mate.
00:17:06Well, I'd better...
00:17:07Okay.
00:17:07Yeah.
00:17:08Gary Vassisi!
00:17:10The Money Man!
00:17:11See you around, runner!
00:17:26It's too hot for pants.
00:17:29Yes!
00:17:30Yes, it is.
00:17:39I can't.
00:17:42Oh, gross.
00:17:55Hi.
00:17:57Hey.
00:18:01Hey.
00:18:02Hey.
00:18:03Hey!
00:18:06Hey!
00:18:07Hey, lady!
00:18:08Gary!
00:18:10Uh, is that a girdle?
00:18:12This?
00:18:13Huh.
00:18:14Yeah, it's hardly a girdle.
00:18:16Uh, they're compression shorts, actually.
00:18:18You might have seen them on Professional Athletes.
00:18:20Put some pants on, for God's sake, he's a dying man.
00:18:23It's too hot for pants.
00:18:25Yeah, it might be too hot for a lot of things, but, uh, cutting the outline of a dick is
00:18:28not one of them.
00:18:30Oh, there he is.
00:18:33Oh, this is Nelson.
00:18:35Hey.
00:18:36Like the wrestling move?
00:18:37Yeah.
00:18:38Full Nelson?
00:18:39Or, uh, there's a half Nelson?
00:18:42Yeah, I got that.
00:18:43Yeah.
00:18:43Yeah, like the other name that's on the wedding invitation that you never reply to.
00:18:48It's in a couple of days.
00:18:50We want to get married before we evacuate.
00:18:53There's sea water in our water supply.
00:18:55Ah, that's no good.
00:18:57The sea water, I mean, not the wedding.
00:18:59Well, at least take off your stuff and shoes, you look ridiculous.
00:19:02No, it doesn't.
00:19:03She's just kidding.
00:19:03You look really cool.
00:19:06Ah, fine.
00:19:07Did you even get him anything?
00:19:13Damn it.
00:19:40Dead.
00:19:41Dead?
00:19:45Good to see you.
00:19:48It's been a long time, eh?
00:19:54I, uh, got you this.
00:20:02Thanks.
00:20:03It's, uh, a disc one.
00:20:05It's got shock management technology.
00:20:08Yep.
00:20:10You're doing well, eh?
00:20:12Oh, yeah.
00:20:14Um, it's been crazy busy.
00:20:17And the ladies?
00:20:20Yeah, good.
00:20:21Good, yeah.
00:20:22I got a, uh, hot little American biscuit back home.
00:20:26Um, she's, uh, pretty keen for me to put a ring on it.
00:20:30But, um, just biding my time.
00:20:31Treating me and keeping keen, that sort of thing.
00:20:33Uh, yeah, yeah.
00:20:34Yeah.
00:20:35Yeah, not, um, domestic violence, so not, not that mean.
00:20:39Um, but I have nita on the back once, but, uh, cramp, you know?
00:20:45Lack of salt.
00:20:46N-A-C-L.
00:20:48That's my boy.
00:20:52Yeah, I've been, um, meaning to visit, um, but, you know, I thought he'd be gone by now.
00:21:00Gone from the island, not, not gone.
00:21:02I thought I'd stay on the captain of the ship, you know, that kind of thing.
00:21:07Uh, yeah, cool.
00:21:09Like in Titanic.
00:21:10Great movie.
00:21:12James Cameron, what an imagination.
00:21:16Where are your pants?
00:21:18Uh, outside.
00:21:20I took them off.
00:21:21Oh, good boy.
00:21:23It's too hot.
00:21:24It is too hot.
00:21:37It's too hot.
00:21:38All right.
00:21:38Well, uh, all the best.
00:21:48I'll just, I'll catch her out.
00:22:11How'd it go?
00:22:12Uh, yeah, good.
00:22:15Yeah, still dying though.
00:22:16Uh, that's not what you meant, eh?
00:22:18No, that's not what I meant.
00:22:20We don't even know how long he's got.
00:22:22Could be weeks, days.
00:22:25So annoying.
00:22:27For him.
00:22:28Not knowing the specifics.
00:22:29I mean, hard to plan anything in advance, I mean.
00:22:31Like a weekend away, you're booking a restaurant.
00:22:34I mean, look, there's a, a restaurant here.
00:22:36I mean, that's a good question though.
00:22:37Is there a restaurant here?
00:22:38You haven't built one while I was away?
00:22:41I'm famished.
00:22:42It's gonna be okay.
00:22:43Yeah.
00:22:43It's really good you're here.
00:22:45Yeah, I know it's good I'm here.
00:22:46I just want to know what my dining options are.
00:22:48That's my point.
00:22:48There aren't any restaurants.
00:22:50Finally.
00:22:51Straight talker.
00:22:52That's all I wanted to know.
00:22:54Gary.
00:22:55I was thinking, with you being here and seeing as we're gonna be bros
00:23:01in laws real soon.
00:23:03Would you do me the honor of being my best man?
00:23:09It'd have meant a lot to us.
00:23:11It's just that...
00:23:13You're leaving?
00:23:14Yeah.
00:23:15Now?
00:23:16It's just that my girlfriend is chomping at the bit for me to get home.
00:23:19I mean, you know how women are.
00:23:20Yeah.
00:23:21Yeah, women suck.
00:23:26Gary.
00:23:28Yes?
00:23:29Dad's dying.
00:23:33Yeah.
00:23:34We had a nice chat.
00:23:35Such a joke.
00:23:37Okay.
00:23:38Well, if a luxury sports car and an open plan office in New Zealand's
00:23:42second fastest growing population centre under 100,000 is a joke,
00:23:45then yeah, I guess I am a joke.
00:23:54I'm not a joke.
00:24:08You're leaving the island?
00:24:09Yeah.
00:24:11Oh, I didn't ever get to share one of my special pizzas with you.
00:24:17They're the only ones on the island.
00:24:18I get them especially.
00:24:23No, and share them with people I like.
00:24:27Yum.
00:24:32Hey, just place your feet here.
00:24:34Just raise your hands for me, please.
00:24:39Oh.
00:24:41Oh, um.
00:24:42It's a Prince Albert.
00:24:45It's a pacing.
00:24:47It makes sex more intense.
00:24:51More intense?
00:24:53Wow.
00:24:55Yeah, it's taken a while to heal, but, um, I keep knocking the scab.
00:24:59Yeah, I bet.
00:25:00Women, fast cars, genital sores.
00:25:04Man, I wish I was successful like you.
00:25:10Huh.
00:25:13Either the supply ship is on its way, or the cheap is dead.
00:25:24Yeah.
00:25:25Yeah, the cheap is dead.
00:25:29Ah.
00:25:42Hey, sorry, bro.
00:25:43My mouth can be dumb sometimes.
00:25:45Oh.
00:25:49I can hug you if you want to keep praying.
00:25:52Oh.
00:25:53Nah, it's alright.
00:25:54I'm alright.
00:25:57That's cool.
00:25:59Hey, I know what'll cheer you up.
00:26:01I'll let you return the Discman if you like.
00:26:02So long as it's still in its original packaging.
00:26:06No, no, it's...
00:26:08I'm fine.
00:26:09I'll just...
00:26:10Yeah.
00:26:11Yeah, man, of course.
00:26:17Stink, Buzz.
00:26:29He named you...
00:26:32Name me...
00:26:34Chief.
00:26:36What?
00:26:38He named you Chief.
00:26:40What are you there for?
00:26:44Who wanted you to have this?
00:26:47Uh...
00:26:48No, I'm fine for Cap's thanks.
00:26:50I need certain hats work with my head shape.
00:26:52It's his Chief's hat.
00:26:55Well...
00:26:55I don't want it.
00:26:57I'll just pass.
00:26:58Gary.
00:27:03Okay.
00:27:03That's really sweet.
00:27:05And...
00:27:06Just so you know,
00:27:07Lani's gonna be a really great Chief.
00:27:10So...
00:27:11Good on you.
00:27:13Right choice.
00:27:18Are you sure?
00:27:19Yeah.
00:27:22This is definitely what you want.
00:27:24Yeah, it's a...
00:27:25It's a...
00:27:25Pretty silly looking hat anyway.
00:27:27I don't even like fish.
00:27:29I prefer...
00:27:31Chicken...
00:27:33Ham...
00:27:34Potatoes.
00:27:35Love potatoes.
00:27:36If there was a potato on that hat then...
00:27:39Yeah, maybe I'd wear that.
00:27:43But...
00:27:43Not fish.
00:27:44Not for me.
00:27:53Big shoes to fill, eh?
00:27:57Not that he ever wore shoes, but...
00:28:01It's a saying.
00:28:03What can I say that hasn't already been said?
00:28:07His feet...
00:28:08Were enormous.
00:28:11His waistline...
00:28:12Was massive.
00:28:14But the biggest thing about him...
00:28:16Was by far his heart.
00:28:20Just to be clear though, that wasn't what killed him.
00:28:22It wasn't...
00:28:23Congenital heart failure.
00:28:25Or type 2 diabetes.
00:28:27It was the cancer.
00:28:28Oh, yeah.
00:28:30Thought so.
00:28:58It was the cancer.
00:29:26And a dragon's one.
00:29:28Thanks to the Prime Minister.
00:29:30We're honoured you made the trip from the main island to be with us today.
00:29:33And just so you all know, we've postponed the wedding for the period of mourning.
00:29:58Hi. On behalf of the Prime Minister, we just want to give you this little guy to express our deepest
00:30:03sympathies.
00:30:03I'm leaving. I don't want a pig.
00:30:05Oh, the pig was really an icebreaker. We need to talk about the resettlement money. We still need the payment.
00:30:11Sorry, I don't know anything about that. I'm not the chief. I turned it down.
00:30:15What did you do that for? Power as an aphrodisiac. What am I going to do with this pig?
00:30:21I... I'm just... I'm sorry.
00:30:29Are you sure you don't want to stick around for the royal wedding?
00:30:32Hardly royal.
00:30:32I don't know. It's going to be pretty flash. The whole island is chimping in. Open bar. Probably eat whatever
00:30:38pigs are left.
00:30:39Your dad was saving up for it for years.
00:30:44Really?
00:30:45Yeah. It's going to be the best wedding ever.
00:30:54Are you coming back on the island?
00:30:56Yep.
00:30:57Attaboy. Show me the man who can resist an open bar.
00:31:01Hey, I'm going to have to process you though.
00:31:02I'm going to have to do it.
00:31:07I thought you'd left.
00:31:09Yep.
00:31:11Boop.
00:31:11What are you doing? You gave it up.
00:31:14No, I'm staying. And I need the hat. Because to be a chief, you have to look like a chief.
00:31:19Okay?
00:31:20Wow, so smart. Never thought about that.
00:31:22I'm chief now, though.
00:31:24Hey, I'm not doing it for me. I'm doing it for Dad.
00:31:26It was his dying wish.
00:31:28Plus, I am the one who was university educated.
00:31:31I mean, you're not even street smart.
00:31:33Now, don't blame you. I blame the link of streets.
00:31:36You are a dick.
00:31:38Am I?
00:31:40Yeah.
00:31:41It's a big responsibility.
00:31:43Yeah, sure it is.
00:31:44Guess this will mean you'll be here for the wedding.
00:31:47Best man.
00:31:49Yeah, sure. Absolutely.
00:31:51Yeah.
00:31:52Yes!
00:31:52Yeah.
00:31:53So there's just a small matter of the phalae.
00:31:58The chief's phalae.
00:32:00Oh yeah, got it. I'll start packing.
00:32:01You're kicking us out?
00:32:04You know, the only reason why we're staying here is because we were the ones that were looking after Dad.
00:32:09While he was on his deathbed?
00:32:11Yeah. Well, take that.
00:32:12Yeah, take the bed.
00:32:13Take the deathbed.
00:32:14And the, uh, pitted sheets.
00:32:16He just died on it. It's not like he's shat in it.
00:32:19Correct me if I'm wrong, but, uh, I do believe he did shit himself on it once.
00:32:24When he had that rooster.
00:32:28The chief's phalae is the chief's phalae.
00:32:30And, well, I'm the chief.
00:32:33So I guess that's an order.
00:32:35So if you wanna zip around and pick up your stuff.
00:32:39Okay.
00:32:41You enjoy your new place.
00:32:43Thanks.
00:32:43Chief.
00:32:52Oh, hi, Nelson.
00:32:56Here you go.
00:32:58Oh, hi, Nelson.
00:33:11Here you go.
00:33:12I've been looking there in my long shadow
00:33:25Oh, awesome.
00:33:27I never got to thank you properly for the discman.
00:33:32What the hell?
00:33:34You didn't really think I'd leave you to muck it all up, did you?
00:33:39Okay, just need.
00:33:41It's not real.
00:33:43It's just this bloody hate.
00:33:48Okay, I'm not going to talk to you.
00:33:50It'll just make you real in my head.
00:33:52Hey, Gary.
00:33:55Yes?
00:33:57Oh, I got you to talk to me!
00:33:59Oh, I got you!
00:34:01I got you!
00:34:05I'll make you talk to me!
00:34:08Hey, you want a little treat?
00:34:10Check out what's in there.
00:34:14Sister Act.
00:34:16Whoopi Goldberg.
00:34:18She's my perfect woman.
00:34:19You know, she's funny and sexy.
00:34:22Usually with women, you get either one or the other.
00:34:24Like your mother.
00:34:25She couldn't tell a joke to save her life.
00:34:27But get into bed, didn't she?
00:34:28Shush, Dad, shush.
00:34:29Oh, now you're shushing a delusion.
00:34:31You're losing it.
00:34:32You might be a mentor.
00:34:41Fine, if you're going to be so chatty,
00:34:43all this money, that's for Lani's wedding, right?
00:34:46Oh, some of it is, but most of it's for the new village.
00:34:49Help everyone get settled on the main island.
00:34:51All right.
00:34:54Hey, Chloe, how's it going?
00:34:56Not good.
00:34:57I'm going home.
00:34:58Also, you're being evicted because you didn't pay the rent.
00:35:00I mean, I just don't...
00:35:01Don't worry about that.
00:35:03Everything's changed now.
00:35:04Did you get the dog?
00:35:06Sure.
00:35:07How'd you pay for it?
00:35:08I told you, I'm the chief now,
00:35:10which means our financial situation is pretty rosy.
00:35:14Rosie's good.
00:35:18So...
00:35:18It's a yes?
00:35:21Well...
00:35:22I have always wanted an island wedding.
00:35:26Is it a nice island?
00:35:28Yeah.
00:35:29It's beautiful.
00:35:30It's like Hawaii.
00:35:32Hawaii?
00:35:33I love Hawaii.
00:35:35Okay, so just get all that stuff up.
00:35:38Maybe not the branches.
00:35:40Yeah, not the branches.
00:35:41Yeah, well, just leave the organic matter.
00:35:43Let's concentrate on inorganic matters.
00:35:45Plastics, plastics, plastics.
00:35:47Okay.
00:35:51Hey, whose dog is this?
00:35:53Dog, whose dog?
00:35:55You're going to need a hand with a fridge, mate.
00:35:57It's very heavy.
00:35:58Yeah.
00:35:59Stop by yourself.
00:36:01Look at him.
00:36:03It's like a Pacific Island Jesus.
00:36:05Up we go.
00:36:05Bend your knees, please.
00:36:06Don't need you back like a crane.
00:36:07Just when we needed him most, he came back.
00:36:11Legend.
00:36:13Yeah.
00:36:14Actually, put that down.
00:36:15Actually, put it down.
00:36:16Put the fridge down.
00:36:17Yeah.
00:36:18Yeah, leave it.
00:36:19He's doing a good job, I suppose.
00:36:20Telling everyone what to do.
00:36:22Just like Jesus did.
00:36:25Oh, classic Jesus.
00:36:27What's in that bucket, mate?
00:36:28What's in the bucket, mate?
00:36:29Sandwiches.
00:36:29Okay, it's not picnic day, mate.
00:36:31It's rubbish, though.
00:36:32What sort of sandwich?
00:36:38Who bloody threw this t-shirt out?
00:36:40All right, good work, everyone.
00:36:42Ah.
00:36:45So, what do we do with this now?
00:36:47Oh, I'll show you.
00:36:51Whoa.
00:36:53Seriously?
00:36:54Yeah, burning all this rubbish is bad for the environment.
00:36:58The current takes it out to that island.
00:37:00Yep.
00:37:01Perfect system.
00:37:03I mean, the ocean basically works as a garbage chute.
00:37:06Makes sense.
00:37:08Mother nature.
00:37:09So amazing.
00:37:14The world is an incredible place.
00:37:28Hey!
00:37:30Hey!
00:37:34Oh!
00:37:35Oh!
00:37:36Oh!
00:37:37Oh!
00:37:44Oh, my God!
00:37:48Are you okay?
00:37:50Holy shit!
00:37:52It just...
00:37:53Oh, poor thing.
00:37:57I think you're meant to do this after the wedding.
00:38:01Jeez!
00:38:02You're really sweating!
00:38:04Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
00:38:06ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:38:06Oh!
00:38:08Sorry, there's usually a proper bed there with sheets and stuff, but he shit himself, so...
00:38:14It was a great year with some incredibly successful people putting their hands up to be counted as our best.
00:38:20But the accolade can only go to one, and so our next chief is Chief Gary Vississi!
00:38:29Thank you for choosing me as your new chief.
00:38:34This award is really a testament to, yes, my skill, but also, my joie de vivre.
00:38:42And I suppose you're all wondering, what do I think of being awarded chief?
00:38:47Well, I guess I'm sold on it.
00:38:52Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
00:38:58ha.
00:39:03Any time of night, you can come in here and do your ablutions.
00:39:11Are you a fan of Whoopi Goldberg?
00:39:12Who?
00:39:14Who?
00:39:14Is she living in a hole?
00:39:16Never mind.
00:39:17I mean, it's pretty basic, but we are in the islands.
00:39:21And what I can promise you is an amazing fairy tale wedding, just like Monica's.
00:39:26Now, I've seen the episode, by the way.
00:39:30Chandler is crazy.
00:39:31I know.
00:39:32I know.
00:39:33Chloe, will you marry me?
00:39:36Question mark.
00:39:37Gary.
00:39:40That's just a shell.
00:39:42Will I get a proper ring?
00:39:44Yeah, yeah, this is just a place I'll know.
00:39:49Yes.
00:39:50Now, you've all seen her agree to that.
00:39:52Now, that's being witnessed.
00:39:54That's being witnessed.
00:40:06Hey.
00:40:08Hello.
00:40:09Whoa.
00:40:10Smells like sex in here.
00:40:11Am I right?
00:40:12No, it doesn't.
00:40:13Yeah, we didn't have full sex last night.
00:40:16Could be that durian, though.
00:40:19Nah, that stuff smells like a rotting animal.
00:40:21Oh, you obviously haven't had sex with your sister before.
00:40:27No.
00:40:29Sorry.
00:40:29Sex with Lani doesn't smell like this.
00:40:32Oh, yuck.
00:40:33That's gross.
00:40:34It's insulting.
00:40:36Hey.
00:40:37Hey.
00:40:38Nice to meet you, Papa.
00:40:40Oh, you too.
00:40:41And thank you so much for moving your wedding day for us.
00:40:45Uh, no.
00:40:47We haven't.
00:40:48No.
00:40:49No, not yet.
00:40:50Um, I was just about to pass on that information.
00:40:54Hey, but here's the good news.
00:40:55This gives you guys more time to organise table decorations and things for whenever your wedding will be.
00:41:01Um, and another silver lining.
00:41:03Uh, you've got two extra pairs of hands here to help with the getting out of here.
00:41:07One, one pair of hands, one solid pair of, of helping hands.
00:41:13Best to get out of this point.
00:41:14Abort.
00:41:15Cool.
00:41:15Yep.
00:41:15So, we better get going.
00:41:17Snorkeling waits for no man.
00:41:18Hey, bye.
00:41:19See ya.
00:41:20Gary.
00:41:21Look, I'm sorry if our plans affect you.
00:41:23You'll still get your wedding, just not on that day.
00:41:26But that's the only day we can do it on the island.
00:41:28Exactly.
00:41:29That's why we need it.
00:41:30It's not our fault your island is sinking.
00:41:32It's global warming.
00:41:34Uh, warming?
00:41:36What?
00:41:36It's global warming?
00:41:37No, it's warning.
00:41:39As in, look out, globe.
00:41:41Huh.
00:42:00Goddammit!
00:42:00I thought you were a shark.
00:42:02We're in two feet of water.
00:42:03Sharks come in all sizes.
00:42:04That's their greatest weapon.
00:42:05You're not taking their wedding day.
00:42:07Well, I am, actually.
00:42:08What about a double wedding?
00:42:09That'd be fun.
00:42:10Who knew?
00:42:11It'll ruin the specialness.
00:42:13Oh, yeah.
00:42:14Well, good luck, dickhead.
00:42:16Pretty sure no one here's going to your wedding.
00:42:19Oh, they will.
00:42:20Well, I've got heaps of friends here.
00:42:21I've got heaps of friends here.
00:42:21Get the honour.
00:42:22That's one.
00:42:23That guy that lives at the house of the peak.
00:42:25That's another one.
00:42:26That's two right there, without even thinking about it.
00:42:29It's just rocks and fish.
00:42:31It's really boring.
00:42:32Yeah.
00:42:36You are tense.
00:42:39Um, hey, don't worry about, uh, Lani's stupid wedding.
00:42:43I'm not worried.
00:42:44I've already found the perfect dress.
00:42:47Is it $18,000?
00:42:49Wow, that is really lovely.
00:42:53I know.
00:42:54I probably should have said something earlier.
00:42:56Um, it's just that it's a royal wedding.
00:42:58So the people will be expecting you to wear the traditional thing.
00:43:02I've got the one that my mum wore.
00:43:05Yeah.
00:43:06Okay.
00:43:07Uh, where's the wrap?
00:43:12Oh, that's not a floor mat.
00:43:15Um, that's my, uh, mum's wedding mat.
00:43:21Jesus.
00:43:22How big was she?
00:43:24Well, according to the medical definition, she was morbidly obese.
00:43:28But that's just a term that they bandy around a lot these days.
00:43:32First, it's a ring made out of a shell, and now I'm getting married in a mat?
00:43:37It's just a tradition.
00:43:38It means a lot to me and all the people here.
00:43:40I'm not getting married in a mat.
00:43:42Describe it like a sausage roll.
00:43:43Doing wrapping, is the, is the, is the pastry.
00:43:47Yeah, but don't think of it like a mat.
00:43:48Think of it like a fancy mat.
00:43:51Pastry.
00:43:52Look, me dressing up in traditional stuff, it's basically like doing a blackface menstrual,
00:43:58isn't it?
00:43:58I mean, it's funny, yes, for a Christmas party or something, but not for a wedding.
00:44:17Hey, I love you, and I will do whatever it takes.
00:44:21Okay, I'll wear the mat.
00:44:22Really?
00:44:23As long as everything else is exactly how I want it.
00:44:26I mean it.
00:44:28I don't want a penny spared on this wedding.
00:44:29Yes, not a, not a penny spared.
00:44:31Yep, that should be sweet.
00:44:35Uh, everyone's kind of busy getting ready to leave, so they mightn't be up for a hen's
00:44:39party.
00:44:40Gary, it's a hen's party.
00:44:41If you asked me what my top five memories of my lifetime are, I'd say four of them are
00:44:46hen's parties.
00:44:47Huh.
00:44:48It's my gift to these people.
00:44:49The greatest day of their lives.
00:44:59Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom.
00:45:03More like the size we want, isn't it, ladies?
00:45:06Yeah.
00:45:08It's a cake, but it's a penis.
00:45:13It's a penis cake.
00:45:17Oh, oh, games.
00:45:19You guys want games?
00:45:21Everybody loves games.
00:45:23Spin the bottle.
00:45:26Ready?
00:45:29Okay.
00:45:31Truth or dare?
00:45:34Truth?
00:45:35No, that's boring.
00:45:36Choose dare.
00:45:38Dare?
00:45:39Yes, dare.
00:45:41Okay, ooh.
00:45:42Um, you have to kiss the person next to you with an open mouth.
00:45:48She's my mother.
00:45:50Uh, then what about her, then?
00:45:52That's her sister.
00:45:55Yeah, she's my sister.
00:45:57All right.
00:45:58You lose your turn for being lame.
00:46:01Isn't this great?
00:46:03Just a couple of jokers drinking, swearing, and dressing up in ladies' things.
00:46:08Yeah.
00:46:08The thing is, it kind of just has to be my stag do, though.
00:46:12Oh, yeah?
00:46:12Yeah, I'm the chief, and it'll be confusing for the people about which wedding's more important.
00:46:16I mean, you understand, right?
00:46:18Yeah, I got it.
00:46:19Yeah.
00:46:21So, you're gonna have to take off the bra.
00:46:23It's the stag's thing to have to wear a woman's bra.
00:46:25You can't just put one on yourself.
00:46:28That's not funny.
00:46:35Truth.
00:46:36Oh, okay.
00:46:38Truth.
00:46:39Oh, you have to do it about Gary.
00:46:41Yes.
00:46:42Tell me something about Gary that I don't know.
00:46:47Well, he used to be skinny.
00:46:53That's funny.
00:46:55And really muscly.
00:47:01Okay.
00:47:02He may have let himself go a bit, but that's his genetics fault.
00:47:08Anyway, at least he got off this island.
00:47:11Well, we all paid for him to get off the island to go to university.
00:47:15He didn't go to university.
00:47:18Yes, he did.
00:47:20We all chipped in and paid for it.
00:47:22No, he didn't.
00:47:24He started a property empire.
00:47:25He's an entrepreneur.
00:47:31Oh.
00:47:32So, uh, how is this property empire working out?
00:47:39All the best entrepreneurs go broke at a certain point along their road to success before they hit it big.
00:47:49Anyway, it doesn't matter.
00:47:50Because your dad made us chiefs.
00:47:55Let's eat this penis before it melts.
00:47:57Let's eat this.
00:47:58Let's eat this.
00:47:59Woohoo!
00:48:01Now that is the giant slab pizza.
00:48:05It's won every single square pizza award.
00:48:07Wow.
00:48:08That's impressive.
00:48:09Right?
00:48:13Yeah?
00:48:14Good, right?
00:48:18Yeah?
00:48:24Mmm.
00:48:27Good, right?
00:48:31Hmm?
00:48:34Ha.
00:48:34Hey, that's mum's.
00:48:36Yeah, your dad gave it to me and Lani.
00:48:38What's he doing giving away stuff like that?
00:48:40I'm the male in the family.
00:48:42Can I have it, please?
00:48:44Uh...
00:48:44Well, it's more mine than yours.
00:48:46And I am the chief.
00:48:48And I did say, please.
00:48:50Hey, guys.
00:48:51It's not really mine.
00:48:52It's Lani's.
00:48:54Dad would have wanted me to have it.
00:48:55Mmm.
00:48:56I'm not fussed.
00:48:57Guys!
00:48:59You want to see my ring?
00:49:05Oh!
00:49:05Oh, my God.
00:49:07Now I can be really good at sex, too.
00:49:09Like you.
00:49:11What have you put through it?
00:49:14It's one of my mum's earrings.
00:49:17You've massacred your penis.
00:49:19Does it even work anymore?
00:49:21That's a real shame.
00:49:23You've ruined it.
00:49:27Actually, that is pretty sore.
00:49:35Give me the ring.
00:49:45Okay.
00:49:46First person to pin the other wins the ring.
00:49:49You idiot.
00:49:50Look at the size of me.
00:49:52I'm going to crush you.
00:49:53I'm not too concerned.
00:49:55I wrestled all through school and socially well into my mid-twenties.
00:49:59Don't you remember my extensive knowledge of full Nelsons and half Nelsons?
00:50:02Actually, it sounded like very rudimentary knowledge.
00:50:05I've handled the bigger lats.
00:50:07There were a lot of fatties at our school.
00:50:09I cracked a lot of fatties.
00:50:12You cracked a lot of fatties at school?
00:50:15Yes.
00:50:16Okay, you're not...
00:50:17You're not using the phrase right.
00:50:19Okay.
00:50:20On my count to three.
00:50:21One, two, three, fire!
00:50:29What are you stopping, Po?
00:50:32Oh!
00:50:37Oh!
00:50:39Oh!
00:50:39Go to sleep, big man.
00:50:41Ah!
00:50:42Oh!
00:50:43Oh!
00:50:44Ah!
00:50:46Ah!
00:50:47Ah!
00:50:48Oh!
00:50:49Call this rudimentary!
00:50:50Ah!
00:51:05Oh, potatoes!
00:51:13Ah, potatoes!
00:51:26One, two, three, and it's over! It's all over!
00:51:31Derry Bassisi!
00:51:33What the hell?
00:51:36What have you done?
00:51:38You don't deserve this.
00:51:40Yes, yes I do.
00:51:42Why? Because you have a university degree?
00:51:45Yes, and Dad did so.
00:51:47What are you doing on that?
00:51:48No, that's fine. I won the third script!
00:51:51It's true, Ephed.
00:51:53Liar!
00:51:54You threw sand in my eyes and used unsanctioned WWE holds and throws.
00:51:59You gambled my mother's ring?
00:52:01I didn't gamble it. It was a wrestling match.
00:52:07You know I wrestled socially, well into my mid-twenties.
00:52:12You've seen my awards. You've held the trophies.
00:52:17It's my mother's ring.
00:52:19But he cheated.
00:52:29I can win it back!
00:52:31Don't worry about it.
00:52:34We won't need it anymore.
00:52:35We won't need it anymore.
00:52:37Blarney.
00:52:53Hey.
00:52:55Hey.
00:52:57Um.
00:52:59I know it's bad luck if I see you before the big day tomorrow, but I've got something for you.
00:53:04Oh, I love you, honey, but you know how I feel about your penis after I've had a few drinks.
00:53:11Nah, it's a proper ring.
00:53:15I realise that you're making a sacrifice by wearing that mat thingy.
00:53:19A big sacrifice.
00:53:21Yeah, so...
00:53:26Is it secondhand?
00:53:29It was mine. It's vintage.
00:53:32Vintage? Cool.
00:53:37You can jerk off if you want.
00:53:39I'll pretend to be asleep so you don't get embarrassed.
00:54:08Are we gonna fight again?
00:54:10No. No, thank you.
00:54:13I'm very sore still. I think it was when I went through the wall. I need that ring back.
00:54:20It's a little late for that.
00:54:24She's, uh, already seen it. Let's put her in a pretty generous mood, you know what I mean?
00:54:30Well, that's nice.
00:54:32I really do need it though.
00:54:35I think I've stuffed everything up with Lani.
00:54:39So if I could please have it back now, that'd be great.
00:54:44The wedding's tomorrow, and the ring should have been mine in the first place. I am the chief.
00:54:48You make me so cross. I just want to chew you out.
00:54:52Do you even know why you're chief?
00:54:54All the villagers' money, the opportunity to go to university, Lani was offered at first.
00:54:59She was gonna study saxophonism, majoring in jazz, both theory and practical.
00:55:05But she threw that all away so you could get an education and be a halfway decent chief.
00:55:10Well, it sounds like that was her decision.
00:55:13She's obviously jealous.
00:55:14She knows about my success, and I can't do anything about that.
00:55:19And I've got some lovemaking I need to finish off.
00:55:3715 kilos of rose petals.
00:55:38Oh, flesh. I wish your mum was this classy.
00:55:42I mean, look at all this stuff.
00:55:44There's like 30 white plastic chairs.
00:55:49Oh my god.
00:55:53Jeez.
00:55:57Paperwork. I just need to check it off.
00:55:59Yeah, no, it's okay. It's fine.
00:56:01It's customs. It's my job too.
00:56:02It's not even a proper job. It's more like a hobby.
00:56:04Yeah, but do something you love and...
00:56:08You don't work a day in your life.
00:56:15Where are the doves?
00:56:17They were $100 per bird.
00:56:19That's a really great price for a dove.
00:56:21What are we gonna release to symbolise peace at the wedding?
00:56:24What are we gonna release, Gary?
00:56:25Well, maybe I could get Katiana to round up a few chooks or something.
00:56:29I don't want chickens at my wedding.
00:56:32Okay.
00:56:34I...
00:56:35What's with all these dogs?
00:56:37Just wandering around with no purpose.
00:56:41Get...
00:56:42Is that a Roman column?
00:56:44Uh...
00:56:45No, I think it's Corinthian.
00:56:47Maybe Derek.
00:56:48Put it back.
00:56:48It's kind of the same thing.
00:56:49All of it?
00:56:50No.
00:56:51No, no, what...
00:56:51Put it back.
00:56:53And what's that?
00:56:54Uh...
00:56:55Teal.
00:56:55That's teal.
00:56:56What's it for?
00:56:58Uh...
00:56:58Netting.
00:56:59It's like a wedding netting.
00:57:00Um...
00:57:01Yeah, don't listen to her.
00:57:02Please.
00:57:02Okay, get...
00:57:03Get going.
00:57:04So where did all this money come from?
00:57:05Chloe said you were broke.
00:57:08Did she?
00:57:09No...
00:57:11Uh...
00:57:11No, she doesn't know about all my investments.
00:57:14I've got money hidden everywhere.
00:57:17In different accounts.
00:57:18A checking account.
00:57:19A savings account.
00:57:20And some gold bullion.
00:57:22Shut up.
00:57:23Got some gold bullion?
00:57:23Just shut your stupid fat lying mouth.
00:57:26Fat mouth?
00:57:27Okay, you're lashing out now.
00:57:28Do you know that?
00:57:29You're fat shaming me.
00:57:30Okay, wait, wait, wait.
00:57:31I'm sorry.
00:57:32Hey Lani.
00:57:32I think...
00:57:33I think I know why you're angry.
00:57:35Okay?
00:57:37Do you?
00:57:38Yes.
00:57:40Why don't you just write a number
00:57:41on a bit of paper
00:57:42of what you think Mum's ring is worth.
00:57:44And...
00:57:45Oh no, I don't...
00:57:46I don't have a pen.
00:57:47Um...
00:57:48Just tell me the number
00:57:49and I'll write a cheque post dated
00:57:50for that amount.
00:57:52And...
00:57:52And...
00:57:53Actually, first things first,
00:57:54let's track down that pen.
00:57:55Okay?
00:57:56Do you have any stationery?
00:57:57You may have that hat,
00:57:58but you're not our chief.
00:58:11Oh, did you get the mat sorted
00:58:13and cleaned and...
00:58:15That looks great!
00:58:19Ah...
00:58:22It's perfect.
00:58:22I'm not trying to sneak a look.
00:58:24I'm just hanging Mum's mat outside for you.
00:58:27Alright?
00:58:39Ah...
00:58:39Hey.
00:58:41Thanks for coming.
00:58:43Um...
00:58:43Just a...
00:58:44Just a quick question...
00:58:45for you.
00:58:47Um...
00:58:47The whole payment thing...
00:58:50Um...
00:58:50Can that be an instalment?
00:58:52Or...
00:58:54Can...
00:58:54Can...
00:58:55Can...
00:58:56Do you need it all at once?
00:58:57Are you welching?
00:59:00No!
00:59:01No!
00:59:01No, no, no, I'm not.
00:59:03I'm not...
00:59:04I'm not a welcher.
00:59:05No, um...
00:59:05I was just looking for a more lenient payment plan.
00:59:09Actually, don't worry about it.
00:59:10We'll...
00:59:10We'll catch up after.
00:59:11Okay.
00:59:23Hey!
00:59:25I get why you don't want to go to the wedding.
00:59:28Good instincts.
00:59:31You there?
00:59:32Just cough if you're there.
00:59:34Of course I'm here.
00:59:35You can see me.
00:59:37Yeah, I can see you.
00:59:38Through the wall that I smashed through with my body.
00:59:42I don't know what happened.
00:59:44It's Gary.
00:59:45He brings out the worst of me.
00:59:46Self-confidence.
00:59:47Which I now know is wrong.
00:59:51And...
00:59:53I just wanted to say, whether you're going to the wedding or not,
00:59:56I want to be with you.
00:59:59And about the ring, I'm really sorry about that.
01:00:01That was uncalled for.
01:00:03But in my defence, I have won a lot of wrestling championships.
01:00:06And if you'll notice some of the awards behind you on the...
01:00:11Oh no, I'm doing it again.
01:00:13Self-confidence.
01:00:15No more of that, I promise you.
01:00:18I'm done with it.
01:00:29Those ones are in very tentacles.
01:00:33I cancelled in there, no memory of them.
01:00:33It's what I thought for you guys.
01:00:33That's not thinking of being able to win the weekend until I know you guys who you'll see in the...ilation.
01:00:34Stay bury
01:00:34me. I don't
01:00:35waiting. At one point too.
01:00:39I know I know you're
01:00:42so real hard with you. I don't know. That's
01:00:47how I'm trying to
01:00:49say.
01:01:50You're not getting anything.
01:01:51Oh, come on, guys.
01:01:56Please.
01:01:58What the hell is going on?
01:02:00I thought we had a deal.
01:02:03yeah but it's a dirty old mat
01:02:05I wiped my feet on it
01:02:07yeah but it's a cultural thing
01:02:10are you serious?
01:02:12they're all in a huff because I didn't wear a mat?
01:02:15well that's childish
01:02:16you're right we don't need them
01:02:18let's just get through this
01:02:27this sucks
01:02:29yeah it does suck a bit
01:02:31but the ceremony is always the boring part
01:02:33hehehe
01:02:34sell around the party
01:02:35girls love parties
01:02:37wait till you get to the reception
01:02:38they have this delicious little pig
01:02:40shut up
01:02:43shush
01:02:48Chloe
01:02:49wait
01:02:50Chloe
01:02:51wait
01:02:52no I don't want to
01:02:53I don't
01:02:54this isn't right
01:02:56this isn't what I want
01:02:59it's just all a bit gross
01:03:04the beach is gross
01:03:06the people are gross
01:03:09someone was wearing a t-shirt
01:03:11to my special day Gary
01:03:13it was a woman
01:03:15it's just disrespectful
01:03:23and I'm just a bit gross
01:03:24you're just a bit gross
01:03:29I'm not gross
01:03:32I'm a work in progress
01:03:33I mean I'm thinking of joining a spin class when we get back
01:03:36I've already bought the shoes with the little cleats
01:03:43sorry but you are gross i'm sorry
01:03:53okay i'm gonna go because it's really awkward now yeah go
01:04:12you forgot your ring
01:04:18that's your mum's ring you just threw in the water
01:04:20ah fuck
01:04:26baby it's over there not too far too far maybe there still
01:04:33it's still not funny
01:04:40yes yes good word shame you got no one to give it to
01:04:53manny
01:04:59manny
01:05:00manny
01:05:03manny
01:05:07manny
01:05:08manny
01:05:14hey um i'll just catch you up
01:05:18i want to give you this back the ring
01:05:23man
01:05:34manny
01:05:35manny
01:05:37manny
01:05:39there's something i'd like to give you
01:05:42me
01:05:45i'm sorry and i'd like to propose
01:05:48again
01:05:49will you take me
01:05:53even the way he proposes is a bit fucked
01:05:59like now this is when you want to ask me that
01:06:07i think the generator's out of gas
01:06:12so where's all the bloody petrol
01:06:15did you not pay the bill
01:06:16i thought it was like an electricity bill
01:06:18they still give you electricity they just send you a few warning letters
01:06:21the islands if you don't pay for your petrol they don't send you any petrol
01:06:24right
01:06:25oh shit
01:06:27what
01:06:27oh my freezer
01:06:29oh no no no no no no no no no no no no no no
01:06:34okay
01:06:35well we've gotten to the bottom of the problem
01:06:37uh there's definitely no petrol left
01:06:41so that puzzle's being solved
01:06:43uh sorry to interrupt
01:06:45yes
01:06:46you have our money right
01:06:47what's happening
01:06:49your brother hasn't paid for your new home
01:06:52uh
01:06:53super super important
01:06:55if anyone has any ice
01:06:57now's the time to let me know
01:06:59gary
01:07:01yeah okay
01:07:02yes
01:07:02yep yep we're running a little low
01:07:04on funds
01:07:05but there's nothing
01:07:06that concerns us
01:07:08you suckers chief
01:07:11i think it's time you left gary
01:07:14we
01:07:15we don't want you here anymore
01:07:16you need to leave
01:07:17you can't even pay the bills
01:07:18uh
01:07:20welcher
01:07:21i am not
01:07:22i am not a welcher
01:07:23you need to leave the island now
01:07:25like
01:07:26ah
01:07:53excuse me
01:07:54excuse me
01:07:58you can't wait
01:07:58you can't wait
01:08:03you can't wait
01:08:04you can't wait
01:08:05oh i'm going
01:08:05you want to
01:08:07send me my password
01:08:10no
01:08:11Okay.
01:08:13Okay.
01:08:38God damn it.
01:08:39Pixel again?
01:08:42What is wrong with the grace period?
01:08:49Heading home?
01:08:55Yep.
01:08:56I guess so.
01:08:58Probably go and get my stuff from Chloe's apartment.
01:09:02I got a stereo and a guitar.
01:09:06It's a Stratocaster, so...
01:09:08What a mess, eh?
01:09:10Maybe you should have actually gone to university.
01:09:14Oh, it's too dumb for uni.
01:09:18That's why I got into real estate.
01:09:20Easy money.
01:09:22Everyone needs a home.
01:09:23I just wanted to come back as someone, but...
01:09:27I don't know, I just...
01:09:30Just a loser.
01:09:35I just wasted everyone's money.
01:09:39Do you know what Whoopi Goldberg said as coach of the New York Knicks in the hit film Eddie?
01:09:44No.
01:09:46He might have bought the team.
01:09:49But you didn't buy these people, the fans.
01:09:53Why do you think I made you chief?
01:09:56Because I'm a man?
01:09:57Oh shit, no.
01:09:59I don't believe in all that traditional stuff.
01:10:02Oh laden would be a way better chief than you.
01:10:05I just wanted you to stay on the island, you know?
01:10:08Be there for your sister.
01:10:13Well, they did a pretty good job of screwing that up.
01:10:17She hates me.
01:10:19And I can't fix it.
01:10:23And I'm gonna die out here.
01:10:25On a tiny boat.
01:10:35Have you come to help me, Mr. Dover?
01:10:43Get back!
01:10:44Get back!
01:10:51Everybody hates you.
01:10:52Even nature hates you.
01:10:55You better get the paddle back.
01:10:57You're drifting into a rubbish island.
01:10:59Yeah.
01:11:01Come on, Tim Sharks.
01:11:03Mr. Dolphin.
01:11:25Okay, so I know we're meant to be leaving today.
01:11:28But unfortunately, we still don't know where we're leaving to.
01:11:31When are we leaving the island?
01:11:33We don't have an exact date.
01:11:35But until we do, we just have to stick together.
01:11:38We're a family.
01:11:40And we're gonna get through this like a family.
01:11:43I know things aren't great right now.
01:11:46But everyone's gonna be okay.
01:11:49I've got it sorted.
01:11:59Hey!
01:12:00That's great news!
01:12:02You got that sorted so quickly!
01:12:05Oh.
01:12:07Oh no.
01:12:09You haven't got it sorted yet.
01:12:11You are a very good liar.
01:12:14I've always liked that about you.
01:12:18Are you using a very stressful moment to get back with me?
01:12:25Yes.
01:12:39Oh.
01:12:59That kind of family, is it?
01:13:01No.
01:13:03No, not really.
01:13:04This is your captain speaking.
01:13:07Welcome aboard the Cessna 173.
01:13:10Sorry, one...
01:13:11Actually, I don't think there is a 173.
01:13:13Hold on.
01:13:14Sorry, Cessna 171.
01:13:17Sorry, mate.
01:13:17No phones on board.
01:13:18Yeah, yeah.
01:13:19No, seriously.
01:13:23I'm the captain.
01:13:23Hello?
01:13:24Hey, hey, it's Gary.
01:13:25The guy at the brick house.
01:13:27Where the whole family were murdered.
01:13:29Well, technically, there was one survivor.
01:13:32And that's what I want to talk to you about.
01:13:35Family.
01:13:36Now, you mentioned that you wanted to start your own family.
01:13:39Now, you're gonna need a home for that family.
01:13:42I've got a family too.
01:13:44And they're the reason that I am now very motivated to sell.
01:13:47How desperate are you?
01:13:49I said motivated.
01:13:51I didn't say desperate.
01:13:53Hey, dickhead.
01:13:54I'm the captain.
01:13:55You need to shut it down now, alright?
01:13:57Shut it down!
01:13:58Yeah, I'm very...
01:13:59I'm very desperate.
01:14:03200,000.
01:14:05It's the best we can do.
01:14:06200!
01:14:07Yeah.
01:14:08It's just that after I pay off the mortgage, I won't really have much left over.
01:14:16Um...
01:14:16Uh, deal.
01:14:18Really?
01:14:18Yeah, done.
01:14:19I'll drop out the papers.
01:14:20Thank you so much.
01:14:21Bye.
01:14:23Okay, stop the plane, thanks.
01:14:25No go.
01:14:26We're on the roll.
01:14:27No, no, I said stop.
01:14:29Stop, please.
01:14:29I want to get out.
01:14:30Why?
01:14:31Because I'm drunk.
01:14:32What?
01:14:33Wait, are you...
01:14:34Are you drunk?
01:14:35I'm drunk.
01:14:36You're drunk.
01:14:36Look at you.
01:14:37Look at the stadia.
01:14:38Okay, I'm getting off.
01:14:40Hey, hey.
01:14:42Stop.
01:14:42Sit down.
01:14:43Put the bank right over there.
01:14:44Sit down.
01:14:45Sit down.
01:14:46Sit down.
01:14:46It's a high-tech stopper.
01:14:48I'll just leave it alone.
01:14:49Stop it.
01:14:50Stop it right now.
01:14:52Stop it.
01:14:52Let me out of here.
01:14:54Ah.
01:14:56Ah.
01:14:57Ah.
01:14:58Ah.
01:15:01Ah.
01:15:02Ah.
01:15:05I'm doing the right thing getting off that plane, eh?
01:15:08I don't know.
01:15:09There's always pros and cons.
01:15:12Yeah.
01:15:14Yeah, true.
01:15:16What are you gonna do with the money?
01:15:27What do you want?
01:15:28Sorry.
01:15:29I tried to stop him.
01:15:31You're a real arsehole, mate.
01:15:33What?
01:15:34Me?
01:15:34Yeah, of course you.
01:15:36What?
01:15:40Anyway, what can I get for this?
01:15:48Go, mate.
01:15:50Have a little look.
01:15:55Hey.
01:15:56Sorry for calling your arsehole.
01:15:58I was a little hit up.
01:15:59Oh.
01:15:59That's okay.
01:16:00Um, I know it's a bit of a hassle having to row back.
01:16:03Why don't you take my ride?
01:16:04Oh.
01:16:07Just a heads up.
01:16:08It's a vagina magnet.
01:16:13Thanks.
01:16:15Oh.
01:16:17Oh.
01:16:21Oh.
01:16:24Oh.
01:16:28Oh.
01:16:31Oh.
01:16:32Oh.
01:16:33Oh.
01:16:33Oh.
01:16:35Oh.
01:16:35Oh.
01:16:36Oh.
01:16:36Oh.
01:16:36Oh.
01:16:36Oh.
01:16:37Oh.
01:16:40So this is your amazing solution, Rubbish Island.
01:16:44Okay, I realise it's a bit gross, but all land is gross before you develop it.
01:16:51That's why everyone loves property developers.
01:16:53But it's way above the water and we can all be together as a family.
01:16:59Like Dad wanted.
01:17:10Hey, guys.
01:17:20Hey!
01:17:22Guys!
01:17:29Come on, everyone.
01:17:31Let's at least hear what he has to say.
01:17:38I do not deserve this hat.
01:17:42I haven't always been the best chief.
01:17:45And I've made a lot of mistakes.
01:17:48And I might have bought this island.
01:17:51But I haven't bought you, the people.
01:17:58Which is why I'm...
01:18:02Uh, what's the fancy word for, uh, passing it on to someone better?
01:18:08Giving up?
01:18:10No.
01:18:12Handing.
01:18:14Uh, abdicating.
01:18:17Abdicating.
01:18:18I'm abdicating to someone who you deserve much more than me.
01:18:22The person who should have been chief from the very start.
01:18:31Lani, even though this island smells very bad,
01:18:36and it may take us some time to build up the immunities we need to live here comfortably,
01:18:41we can do this together.
01:18:45With you.
01:18:46As our chief.
01:18:59That's no Whoopi Goldberg speech.
01:19:02As it'll do.
01:19:07There you are.
01:19:09You know it's just a hat, right?
01:19:12Yeah.
01:19:14Thought it's Dad's hat.
01:19:22OK, let's clean this island up!
01:20:14So, I finally found
01:20:17success.
01:20:21I have a lot of respect and power on our new home.
01:20:24By the power vested in me as brother of the chief.
01:20:27No, not a thing.
01:20:30You have zero power.
01:20:32By the power vested in me as brother of the chief that I gave myself before I abdicated,
01:20:37kind of like a 2IC sort of role, yeah, I now pronounce you husband and wife.
01:20:45You may now kiss the bride.
01:21:01All of this is testament to, yes, my skill, but also my joie de vivre.
01:21:06Hey.
01:21:07I know a lot of French words.
01:21:09Hey.
01:21:10So, what do you do for a crust?
01:21:13I look after my mother.
01:21:15Yeah, cool.
01:21:16Look.
01:21:16I'm an entrepreneur.
01:21:19It's French.
01:21:21For businessman.
01:21:23I guess you're all wondering what I think of my new life.
01:21:28Well, I'm sold on it.
01:21:49Hey, I really appreciate this.
01:21:51You're a real friend.
01:21:53Yeah, man.
01:21:54No worries.
01:21:58Ooh.
01:22:00So, you put it through that bit.
01:22:03Peahole.
01:22:04Yeah.
01:22:05Yeah, it goes through there.
01:22:07Ah, yes, I agree, Kitiana.
01:22:10That sounds like a perfect place to lay a foundation.
01:22:12Hey, lady.
01:22:13Morning, Gary.
01:22:13You should get that looked at.
01:22:15It looks infected.
01:22:18I'll keep nothing that scared.
01:22:32I wanna define your actions.
01:22:37Wanna tell you some lies and make you see
01:22:42That you are the kind of woman for me
01:22:52I'm gonna ignore my instincts
01:22:57Make you think I'm your prince
01:23:00My Alaskan soul
01:23:03And you'll be a kind of a woman for me
01:23:14My friends are all giving me warnings
01:23:19Giving me good calls to a boyfriend
01:23:23But I'm still remembering something
01:23:27Would come inside of me
01:23:33Would come inside of me
01:23:57But you were ready to try and settle for me
01:24:03And I'd be some kind of lover for you
01:24:13You were gonna ignore your instincts
01:24:18You were thinking that I was something to catch
01:24:23And maybe that I was the man for you
01:24:41Maybe that you can
01:24:44When the naughty girl loves me
01:24:58Stir up the ocean, I'm on my window.
01:25:05And I'm still running.
01:25:09Stir up the ocean, I'm on my window.
01:25:13Oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:25:41Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:25:47Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
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