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The Last Leg - Season 34 - Episode 10
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00:02What a hell of a soul. Thank you for letting us be ourselves. So don't mind me if I repeat
00:08myself. These simple lines be good for your health. Keep them trying where I'm going to show. Live my life
00:14like I just don't care. The lie that I believe is never scared. Raise the noise at the moment they
00:19fear. Get up, shut up, you're not here. Get up, throw your hands in the air. Get up, get up,
00:26get up.
00:38Put on your Easter bonnet, make room for chocolate and cross your hot buns. It's Friday, we're live and it's
00:43time for the last leg.
00:46Tonight on the show, we'll hold space for the Artemis Moon mission, set the record straight about Iran and kick
00:54off our excitement at the upcoming World Cup.
00:57Plus we'll be joined by comedian Josh Pugh, TV legend Lorraine Kelly and online football sensation Steve Bracknell.
01:04On the show that likes to let you know what's really behind the news.
01:17G'day, I'm Adam Hills. Welcome to The Last Leg.
01:21The last Leg, the show that heard Marmite is going to be sold to an American company and thought some
01:25people will hate that deal but others will probably like it.
01:28With me as always with the pride of Dartmoor, Josh Whittacombe and the man who's surprising his kids this Sunday
01:32with an Easter leg hunt.
01:36Alex Brooker.
01:44Loads of news to cover tonight. I want to start with the news that we got this week from Carolyn
01:48who said,
01:48Is it okay that Josh likes to keep socks down his trousers?
01:54Caroline, of course, an ex-girlfriend.
01:58Sorry?
01:59Do you want to explain what you said?
02:00Oh yeah, sorry. Yeah, I didn't hear what, I was laughing at a joke, I didn't hear what you said.
02:03Oh, the amount of times I've heard that.
02:05Um, so, uh, this week, um, I was coming back from a tour show.
02:10Yep.
02:10Uh, the usual way I kind of de-stress after tour shows, I sit in the back of the car
02:14and I have a bowl of shreddies.
02:17Um, from a Tupperware box.
02:21You, you are rock and roll.
02:24Yeah, Jerry Seinfeld calledy once he's a lifestyle bear.
02:27And then I, I put my hand on my leg and I was like, that feels thick, that, um, no,
02:32come on.
02:34Oh, that's a shame.
02:36The family show.
02:37The material.
02:38And then I was like, there's something there.
02:40And I put my hand, because obviously normally you'd go up, but I was like, it's too, so I put
02:45my, I, I'll, I'll be honest, I did my flies, Adam.
02:47Right.
02:48Yeah.
02:48And I put my hand in and I pulled out a sock.
02:52Like that.
02:54It, it didn't bounce with that amount of, uh, the driver must have looked in his rear view mirror and
02:59thought, fuck me, he's enjoying them shreddies.
03:03Or he thought he takes his socks off in a weird way.
03:07So I, I'd gone my whole day.
03:09Yeah.
03:10I'd been with my family in the day and then I'd done the whole gig with a sock in the
03:13gusset of my trousers.
03:15That I hadn't known was there.
03:17Did, you didn't need the word gusset, did you?
03:18No, I didn't really.
03:20I saw you flinch.
03:23I always put my face in it then, it's been down my trousers.
03:26I love that you're going, oh, it was purely an accident there was a sock down my trousers.
03:31It seemed to be an aubergine down there.
03:33It wasn't like a rolled up football sock, it was like just a normal sock.
03:37Well, look, we, we talked about this during the week and knowing this, I've got you an end of series
03:40present.
03:41It's just there to your right.
03:42If you'd like to open it up, it's a pair of googly eyes that you can stick on.
03:46Oh, that's nice.
03:47Turn it into a character.
03:48So let's, let me stick these on.
03:49Yep.
03:50Where do I stick this, so if I was to stick one there.
03:52What, what's my end of series present?
03:54Oh, I've got you some googly fingers.
04:04So I just do it like this.
04:08Oh, look, there you go.
04:10Hello.
04:11Oh, amazing.
04:12That is actually, that, do you know what?
04:15Hello.
04:16What was it like in Josh's pants?
04:19I don't kiss and tell.
04:22How was this gig?
04:24Do you know what?
04:25He absolutely smashed it.
04:27And if you do want to go to Good Night Out, he's still on tour.
04:32And let me be clear, there is tickets available in Griffith.
04:35Did he treat you well down there?
04:38Yes, I, do you know what?
04:41Why have you got such a weird voice?
04:45Which one of us is that too?
04:48I feel like Kermit's getting a seat and desist letter out.
04:52All right, let's move on with the show.
04:54Before we move on, I don't normally say this, but I do need to do up my flies.
04:59So let's carry on, Hilsie.
05:01Okay, we are live, so send us any questions you want to ask us about the news.
05:06Sorry.
05:07I just pretended to catch my foreskin, sorry.
05:10Imagine after I was finally the bit of his body he lost.
05:16Message us on Instagram, the hashtags, is it okay?
05:19WhatsApp, the numbers, 07956175908.
05:22Or scan the QR code on the screen.
05:23For example, Ree said, is it okay that someone has made a break for it with 12 tonnes of Kit
05:28Kats?
05:28Yes, more than 400,000 Kit Kats went missing this week
05:32when a truck carrying the new range set off from central Italy
05:35but never reached its final destination in Poland.
05:38The brand issued a statement saying it's not a stunt
05:40and asked consumers to scan barcodes to help them find the stolen chocolate.
05:46I mean, I don't know how that's going to help.
05:47Most thieves will have melted them down by now.
05:51Can I say how nice it is to do a story about missing fingers on this show
05:55and it's not to do with me?
06:01News of the high sparked an online race.
06:03Other companies issued their own statements like this cheeky post from Domino's
06:06said we would like to share our thoughts and condolences with Kit Kat
06:09following their recent sad news.
06:11On a completely unrelated note, we're pleased to announce
06:13we'll now be selling a new Kit Kat pizza.
06:17Yes?
06:19You know how they can find the thieves, don't you?
06:22Just get a bounty hunter, huh?
06:26Lovely.
06:27Lovely.
06:28You know what?
06:31That is not my kind of humour.
06:37Unsurprisingly, Domino's started a chain reaction
06:38that led to this amusing post from Ryanair.
06:44I've got a lot of questions about that.
06:45Firstly, why has the plane taken a bite out of one end of the Kit Kat
06:48then put the other end in its mouth?
06:51And also, why are there five fingers?
06:54Which is a question we often ask on this show.
06:57Alright, let's get into the big story now.
06:59As fuel prices continue to rise, stock markets continue to fall,
07:02Catherine said,
07:06Yes, it is.
07:07We all need something different and happier
07:09to lighten the world at the moment.
07:10Yes, Catherine!
07:11The American government proved they can do something right this week
07:14as NASA launched a mission to the moon.
07:17The first time they did this was in 1968
07:19when America led an ill-advised war in Vietnam
07:22which had no exit strategy
07:23and ultimately made a mess of the region.
07:26Thankfully, this time things are different.
07:29The ten-day mission will take astronauts around the moon
07:32as they look for a location to build a potential base
07:34from which to explore Mars.
07:36Not so much a place in the sun
07:37as a place on the dark side of the moon.
07:39I stayed up and watched this.
07:41I was so excited about it on Wednesday night.
07:43Did you guys watch it?
07:44Well, you remember the first one, of course.
07:48Sorry, sorry.
07:50So close, but not quite.
07:53No, I didn't.
07:54Did you watch it?
07:55I think it's bad at how jaded I am
07:59and how jaded we are as a generation.
08:01Yeah.
08:03In 1969, was it, people stayed up and watched it?
08:05Yeah.
08:06And I watched it the next day on my phone
08:10while having a piss.
08:13I watched it.
08:14I watched it on my phone.
08:15Well, what I love most is the next thing
08:17it took me to on the algorithm
08:18was just more dash cam footage.
08:21It's everyone's going to go from that
08:22to someone having a rocket cut them up.
08:24What I love most about this story
08:26is it's Easter weekend
08:28and it's quicker and easier
08:30for those astronauts to go round the moon
08:32and back than what it is to get a train
08:34from London to Manchester Piccadilly.
08:42And look, there's a lot to be cynical about
08:43in the world right now,
08:44but it's nice to know the launch of a rocket
08:45can still reduce a professional journalist
08:47to tears of joy.
08:49Here's the incredible moment
08:50the BBC's science editor, Rebecca Murrell,
08:52was blown away by the launch
08:54almost literally.
08:56Oh, my goodness.
08:58Oh.
09:02Wow.
09:04Oh, my goodness.
09:06That is spectacular.
09:08It's not just what you see
09:10and you hear as the rocket nips off.
09:13You can actually feel the force of it
09:15through your body.
09:16This is the most powerful rocket
09:19that NASA has ever built.
09:25Amazing.
09:25That is amazing.
09:26It is amazing.
09:27That's what I was like
09:28when I saw the Backstreet Boys in Vegas.
09:33I mean, a British reporter
09:34hasn't been that excited
09:35by a piece of machinery
09:36since this energetic clip.
09:40Holy shit.
09:46Oh, my God.
09:51That's like you
09:52when you open your Tupperware box
09:53and shredding.
09:55There's one of them
09:55standing under the rocket blast
09:57that's actually quite distressing.
10:00Look, some of the stats
10:01around this launch are incredible.
10:02The rocket, known as Artemis II,
10:04was the same height as Big Ben.
10:06The core stage of liftoff
10:08burnt through 2.8 million litres of propellant
10:10and it will end up travelling
10:11the furthest from Earth
10:12that any human has ever been.
10:14I read that, but also
10:16basically in what NASA
10:17kind of the way they've explained
10:18the route it's taken is
10:19they basically said
10:20it's going to take
10:21a similar trajectory
10:22as Apollo 13.
10:24It's like, don't use that
10:25as the example.
10:27Just down to the astronauts.
10:29Well, the good news is
10:29Tom Hanks has already
10:30signed up to play you.
10:33It's going to land
10:34in a similar place
10:35to the Titanic, I think.
10:39And look, credit where credit
10:40is due.
10:40When Donald Trump
10:41came into office
10:42he signed an executive order
10:43calling for Americans
10:44to return to the moon
10:45by the end of 2028.
10:46So it must be kind of
10:47conflicting for the US president
10:48because on the one hand
10:49America is exploring space again
10:51but it's also
10:52the most diverse NASA crew
10:53to ever leave Earth's orbit.
10:55It features the first woman
10:57and the first person of colour
10:58to travel to the moon.
11:00Now that I say that
11:01it sounds like
11:01it might be a trap.
11:03You know what I mean?
11:04Considering the third
11:05astronaut's Canadian
11:06if the Force One's trans
11:07this might be
11:07the most elaborate
11:08deportation ever.
11:12What's tricky for NASA
11:13is that due to Trump's
11:14ban on mentioning diversity
11:15they can't make a big deal
11:17about the first person of colour
11:18or the first woman
11:19to fly to the moon.
11:20They have to call them
11:21the first person
11:22who's allowed
11:22to fist bump Obama
11:24and the first person
11:25who never likes
11:25the temperature of any room.
11:28When's the first sock
11:29going to the moon?
11:33Are we liking this character
11:34or is it running?
11:35No, no, no, no.
11:37Keep it on.
11:39Every now and again
11:40I see something
11:41that makes me glad
11:41I don't have big hands
11:42and this is...
11:47The ultimate indignity
11:48for a government
11:49that's critical of inclusion
11:50is that the area
11:51between the Earth's orbit
11:52and the moon
11:52is called cislunar space
11:54and the operation
11:55they pulled off last night
11:56was called
11:56a translunar injection.
11:59I mean, the only thing that would make it worse
12:01is if they were travelling in the starship they-them-terprise.
12:05And not only is there an African-American man on board,
12:07Victor Glover is the pilot.
12:10Look, it says a lot about the state of America,
12:11that it's the only journey he can make
12:13without the risk of being pulled over.
12:18By the way, Victor Glover's call sign is Ike, I-K-E,
12:21which stands for I Know Everything,
12:22but does he know he's an embarrassing dad?
12:25Because this gorgeous family photo is giving cringe.
12:30That's actually his living room.
12:32And what he's done is he's just been wearing the suit
12:34since he got the job, that's why.
12:36I like to think he's just been in the house just going...
12:39And it's just like, come on, Victor,
12:41you're making the kids late for school.
12:43It looks like he's the only one who remembered World Book Day.
12:51Not often you can create history and be a full kit wanker.
12:55And look, they are creating history.
12:56I genuinely got chills.
12:58When this emotional final send-off was given to the astronauts.
13:01On this historic mission,
13:04you take with you the heart of this Artemis team,
13:07the daring spirit of the American people
13:10and our partners across the globe,
13:13and the hopes and dreams of a new generation.
13:17Good luck.
13:18Godspeed, Artemis 2.
13:20Let's go.
13:23It's fine, but they never have any banter.
13:27That's what I always think.
13:27They're always trying to talk as if it's going to go on,
13:29like, some sort of monument or something,
13:31where I think they just don't have any workplace banter.
13:34Like, I'd love to hear...
13:34Just imagine doing the count like,
13:36like, five, four...
13:38Fuck, what's that bit of metal that's falling off the top?
13:39Three, two...
13:41There's no coming out of the top.
13:42I only fuck it about with you.
13:43One other good one, guys.
13:46This was the emotive moment
13:48when each of the astronauts gave their final words.
13:52Thank you, Charlie.
13:53This is Victor.
13:53We are going for our families.
13:57MS1.
13:58This is Christina.
13:59We are going for our teammates.
14:02MS2.
14:03This is Jeremy.
14:05We are going for all humanity.
14:08That's lovely, but you reckon the first two were like,
14:10oh, give it a rest, Jeremy.
14:13Family, teammates.
14:14You don't have to bring humanity into war.
14:16Ooh, look at me.
14:17I'm doing this for humanity.
14:20We have to spend ten days with this prick.
14:22I'm going to start doing that when I'm at work.
14:24Just go, I'm doing blankety-blank for humanity.
14:27I'm doing that for humanity.
14:29I'm doing that for humanity.
14:31I just think he's not doing it for humanity, is he?
14:33He's not doing it for me.
14:34If you want to do something for humanity,
14:36get McDonald's to bring back the McRib.
14:40The crew will be in a cramped space
14:42the size of two small camper vans for ten days,
14:44passing around the moon on day six.
14:47There was a tense moment for the astronauts
14:48when a fault was found with the onboard toilet.
14:51In fact, it was with the toilet fan.
14:53Oh, it was in fact...
14:54Because I just imagine, like,
14:55one of the astronauts just coming out going,
14:57I'll give that a couple of light years.
15:00Would it be bad to crack a window?
15:02Is it worth it?
15:03Is it worth it?
15:06The toilet itself costs around $17 million
15:08and comes with foot restraints and ear protectors.
15:12Oh, I thought the $70 million was just for a plumber
15:15to do that call-out.
15:17The ear protectors are for the person on the toilet
15:19or the other people...
15:22No, the toilet makes such a loud noise
15:24because it's zero gravity.
15:26It has to basically suck all the waste
15:28and take it away.
15:30So it makes a loud noise
15:31and you need ear protectors.
15:32Oh.
15:33I don't know why you need foot restraints.
15:35I'm assuming...
15:37I'm assuming it's so that you don't...
15:39I mean, literally launch yourself across the room.
15:45If it's...
15:46I don't want to speak for everyone,
15:48but if it's providing that much propulsion
15:49for other people,
15:51I'm doing it wrong.
15:53But, I mean, it's zero gravity.
15:55It's got a...
15:56I mean, what happens when you fart in space?
15:58Like, you can't hide it
16:00if you've just shot across the room.
16:05That one was for humanity.
16:10The toilet is a step up
16:11from past Apollo missions,
16:12which saw astronauts
16:13taping a bag to their own buttocks.
16:16Jesus Christ.
16:17Oh, my God.
16:18Yeah.
16:19That moonwalk feels a bit different now.
16:21New Armstrong.
16:21We've got a bag take to his arse.
16:24One small bag for man.
16:26One giant man for piss.
16:29One giant man, one giant bag.
16:31There was a famous line
16:33uttered on board Apollo 10,
16:34and this is a direct quote,
16:35give me a napkin quick,
16:36there's a turd floating through the air.
16:40Why have they got napkins
16:41up there in the first place
16:42for fine dining?
16:44I don't know.
16:45They have to catch turds, probably.
16:47Why else would you use a napkin?
16:49Is that why they give me them a prayer?
16:52The astronauts were interviewed overnight,
16:54and they explained how they sleep
16:55in this fascinating clip.
16:58Sleeping here is actually sort of comical.
17:01Christina has been sleeping heads down
17:03in the middle of the vehicle,
17:04kind of like a bat suspended from our docking tunnel.
17:07Victor's been up where Jeremy is right now.
17:09He's got a nice little nook wedged in there.
17:11And then Jeremy has been stretched out on seat one,
17:14and I've been sleeping under the displays
17:16just in case anything goes wrong.
17:18It's more comfortable than you would think,
17:20and it's nice to sleep in weightlessness again.
17:24Every time I was dozing off last night,
17:26I had that image that I was tripping off a curb
17:27and I was waking myself up,
17:29so my body's getting re-acclimated.
17:31It's been a few years since I've been up here.
17:33I was hoping when he got to himself,
17:35he goes, and I sleep naked.
17:40What's my bollocks doing?
17:41Zero gravity.
17:45Before the trip, crew member Reid Wiseman said,
17:47quote, there are definitely going to be things
17:48by day six, seven, eight, nine,
17:50that we're like, man, all right, I need a little space,
17:52and I can't get any right now.
17:54And then said, like, clicking a pen cap
17:56can annoy somebody over ten days in a small capsule.
17:59Which begs the question,
18:00what would we be like in space?
18:01Imagine him trying to dodge loads of floating legs.
18:05Day six, the socks just floats out of my crown.
18:09I like the idea of you going,
18:11Alex, we can't, the radio,
18:13we're not able to get back to Hoosie.
18:14It's like, no, sorry, mate,
18:15I changed it to Kishtry earlier.
18:18I like the idea you've waited 21 years
18:20for Arsenal to win the league
18:21and then you're trapped in space.
18:24All right, let's move on.
18:26No, Josh has already made that joke.
18:28Move on.
18:29No, I think it's fair to say
18:30the mission to the moon
18:31has brought out the child in all of us.
18:33Sorry.
18:33I was going to make a joke.
18:34Josh had already done it
18:35and I was like, well,
18:36there's no point doing the same sock joke again.
18:38The only difference is
18:39I was going to do your impersonation.
18:41I was going to be,
18:41is there a bit of sock down here?
18:43I was doing the voice as well.
18:45My own voice.
18:46NASA even had an initiative
18:48in which members of the public
18:49could send their names around the moon
18:51on an SD card.
18:52So you sign up
18:53and they take an SD card
18:54and they take it around the moon.
18:57Your name goes around the moon.
18:58They even put out a boarding pass
18:59that looked like this.
19:01Now, we know that's what it looks like
19:02because one member of our production crew
19:04actually did it for her and her kids.
19:06Oh.
19:07And her seven-year-old
19:08is still pissed off
19:09that she's not actually going to the moon for Easter.
19:14It's amazing.
19:14And when you look into
19:15what they're actually doing,
19:16it's amazing
19:16because the precision needed
19:17to do what they're doing
19:18is absolutely remarkable.
19:20Have a look at this fascinating clip.
19:21It shows the magnitude
19:22of trying to coordinate a rocket from Earth
19:24that loops around a moving target.
19:28OK.
19:29So there's the rocket going around Earth.
19:30It heads towards where the moon should be.
19:32It hasn't come into shot yet
19:33because it's orbiting the Earth.
19:35Here it comes.
19:36How close is that?
19:38These astronauts are basically combining
19:40physics, chemistry, mathematics and darts.
19:45The way it looked is,
19:47it kind of looked like,
19:47you know when, like,
19:48your Uber driver takes a really long route home?
19:51You're just going,
19:52you've got ways, mate.
19:54It's usually doing another drop-off performing.
19:57It's almost impossible to put into words
19:58what they're managing to achieve,
20:00but I think the final word
20:01should go to this excitable boy in America
20:03who managed to sum it all up beautifully.
20:06Why do you want to be here?
20:08Why do you love space?
20:09Why do you love being a part of history?
20:12We're going back to the frickin' moon,
20:14that's why.
20:16Pretty much says it all.
20:18All right.
20:18Let's welcome tonight's guest,
20:20but let's do it with another special guest.
20:21Josh?
20:22Oh, do you want me to do it?
20:23OK.
20:25She's a telly legend.
20:26He's a comedy star.
20:28But I'm a sock,
20:29so I've heard of neither of them.
20:30It's Lorraine Kelly and Josh Pugh.
20:44CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
20:45Hello, you both.
20:47Um, uh, just for no apparent reason,
20:51but we've got plenty.
20:52Does anyone want a Kit Kat?
20:53No, no, no, I've got punners.
20:56I've, I'm scunnered with them.
20:57I've eaten far too many of them.
20:58OK.
20:59You're what?
21:00Sorry, Lorraine?
21:00I'm scunnered of them.
21:02Scunnered?
21:02Bed up.
21:03Had too many.
21:04Oh.
21:04Were you involved in the hoist?
21:06I cannot possibly comment on that.
21:08Maybe.
21:09Um, did you both follow the moon mission?
21:11What did you think of it?
21:12Oh, my God, it's so exciting.
21:13So exciting.
21:14What do you think?
21:15Are you not, you're not that excited?
21:16I'm not that excited.
21:17I'm so excited.
21:18Do you know what it is?
21:19With astronauts, if you want to go up,
21:21fair enough and all that,
21:22but, um, it's when they try and make up
21:24they're doing it for us,
21:25like, for all humanity,
21:26all, you know, mankind.
21:28We're not bothered, lads.
21:30No one's asking you to go up there.
21:32I think it's, um, just be honest,
21:33you want to go on a rocket,
21:35that's where you're going.
21:36Yeah.
21:36You want to go wee into the sky,
21:37that's what I'm saying.
21:38They were, they had bother with the wees
21:40and the sky, didn't they?
21:42And you two cheeky monkeys,
21:43I actually saw the, um,
21:45original moon landing.
21:46I was 10 and watched it with my dad.
21:47No, Lorraine.
21:49I know, I know.
21:50Oh, my word.
21:52It was the best thing.
21:53No, Lorraine.
21:55Because you were making a joke,
21:57and then it was, oh, but it's the socks.
21:59No, Lorraine, no.
22:01I love the socks.
22:02I'm very, very, very into the socks.
22:04So, would you go into space, Lorraine?
22:06Would I go, if you told me now,
22:08I would be away.
22:09Well, can we finish the show first?
22:12No, it's amazing.
22:13It's extraordinary.
22:15The thing is, the Rockets,
22:16they go from Florida, though.
22:17I just think there's better things to do in Florida.
22:19You've got Animal Kingdom,
22:22Lightning Lagoon,
22:23you know, Epcot.
22:27There was, I love the way people really got into it this week,
22:30but I loved how watching various reporters around the world
22:32cover the rocket launch
22:33reminded everyone around the world of this classic clip.
22:36You may have seen this.
22:37James Burke.
22:37It's often called the best-timed piece of television ever.
22:42And the two gases that he released
22:44from his particular version of a thermos flask,
22:47the one lying on its side behind me now,
22:49were hydrogen and oxygen.
22:56If you release those two gases into a confined space
22:59with a hole at the other end of it
23:01and mix them as you do so
23:02and then set light to them,
23:06you get that.
23:15Destination, the moon.
23:17Wow.
23:24It is incredible,
23:26but how good would it have been
23:27if he'd have had a sock on his hand?
23:31Look, walking and talking
23:32isn't always easy to do on television,
23:34as this revealing clip of Lorraine shows...
23:39She's a mother of three, two...
23:41Oh!
23:43I'm sorry.
23:44I'll do that again.
23:46Superwoman, help me.
23:47Help me.
23:48Is it all right?
23:50I can't show you now.
23:51I can't show you now.
23:54Oh, I hear you.
23:56I hear you.
23:56And look, we're going to give you a chance
23:58to redeem yourself tonight.
23:59OK, OK.
24:00And recreate James Burke's iconic moment
24:03live in the studio.
24:04We've written a little script for you.
24:05It's on the autocue.
24:06Take it away, Lorraine.
24:08Right, OK.
24:08Hopefully, this will work.
24:10Come on.
24:12Walking and talking on television
24:14is harder than it looks.
24:16It requires coordination,
24:18concentration and relaxation.
24:19It's actually quite a bit of pressure.
24:25like the pressure that's applied
24:27to a foot pump
24:27when somebody jumps on it.
24:29If that pressure is then transferred
24:31to a child's toy
24:32pointing towards the sky,
24:34you get this.
24:46Oh, my God.
24:49That doesn't normally happen to me.
24:52Yay!
25:00We'll have more Last Leg for you
25:01after the break
25:02as we come back down to Earth
25:03with a look at what's going on in Iran.
25:05We'll see you in a little bit.
25:06Oh, my God.
25:20Welcome back to Last Leg.
25:22We're joined by Josh Pugh
25:23and Lorraine Kelly
25:24who is handing out chocolates
25:26to everyone in the audience.
25:29Oh, Lorraine, before you go,
25:30someone said,
25:30is it OK that you didn't get a hug
25:32when you came out?
25:32Oh, I didn't.
25:33It wasn't intentional.
25:34No, no, but I hugged it already.
25:35Oh, deep.
25:36Didn't we?
25:37Backstage, we hugged it.
25:38Was there someone
25:39that texted that in yourself, Phil?
25:42Honestly, I didn't get concerned
25:44by so many things.
25:45Someone else said,
25:45is it OK that someone left
25:46some anti-back spray
25:48on the desk at the beginning
25:49of the show?
25:49Yes, that was an accident.
25:52Mad Brummie said,
25:53is it OK Trump broke the window
25:54and is now running away?
25:56Look, it's been a big week
25:57for the American president.
25:58In fact, I'm going to do something now.
25:59I'm going to read off a list
26:00of things Donald Trump said this week
26:02and I want you to tell me
26:03which one I've added
26:04as an April Fool's joke.
26:07This week Donald Trump said
26:08that he hangs around with losers
26:10because it makes him feel
26:11better about himself.
26:12Told an audience of Saudi investors
26:13they could ask him
26:14anything about sex.
26:16Said he doesn't like
26:17museums and libraries
26:18so his library will be a hotel
26:20and claimed that a woman
26:21should have autonomy
26:22over her own body.
26:25Yeah, you picked it.
26:26It was the last one right.
26:28Can I just say,
26:29anyone who says
26:29ask me anything about sex
26:31sounds like someone
26:31who's never done it.
26:34As the war on Iran continues,
26:35the Strait of Humoz
26:36remains closed.
26:37President Trump took
26:38the truth social
26:39to tell Britain
26:39it should either buy
26:40its jet fuel from the US
26:42or quote,
26:43go get your own.
26:45Not surprising
26:45from a guy who said
26:46when you're famous
26:47you can just grab them
26:48by the pussy.
26:49Iran is now considering
26:50placing a toll
26:50on any ships
26:51passing through
26:52the Strait of Humoz
26:53in what one commentator
26:54described as
26:54an Ayatolle booth.
26:58Don't hate it.
27:00What do we think
27:00of Donald Trump
27:01saying we should
27:01get our own oil?
27:02Well, I think we just
27:03fight back.
27:04Mm-hmm.
27:05We just choose
27:06British products.
27:06You should get
27:07your own hobnobs.
27:10You know what, Trump?
27:11Get your own
27:11Ambrosia cream dry.
27:14This side?
27:15You guys?
27:16It's just like
27:18the way Trump
27:18speaks to Britain
27:19it's like he's
27:20like a lad
27:21trying to get his mate
27:22to do something stupid
27:23all the time.
27:24Yeah.
27:25Like set fire to the farts
27:26or something.
27:26The old you would have
27:27done it.
27:28The old you.
27:28She's changed you.
27:29The old you would have
27:30done it.
27:30Okay, then we'll do it.
27:32He's a kid, man.
27:33He's ridiculous.
27:34It's ridiculous.
27:34And look at this.
27:35Oh, yeah.
27:35He's blaming us.
27:37This is mad.
27:37Like, we didn't have...
27:38He's the one who went
27:39and started it.
27:40Yeah, yeah.
27:40He's having to go at us.
27:41And it's basically like
27:42what he's saying is
27:43why aren't you doing
27:44anything about these
27:45pants are off shit
27:45in that I'm wearing.
27:48And look at this.
27:49One country that seems
27:50to be doing well
27:50out of the crisis
27:51it's Russia.
27:52Because just as their
27:53war effort was starting
27:54to run out of money
27:55Donald Trump eased
27:56sanctions on Russian oil
27:58the price of which
27:59has now gone through
27:59the roof.
28:00So the Russian economy
28:01is now pulling in
28:02hundreds of millions
28:03of dollars a day
28:04thanks to Donald Trump.
28:06So it turns out
28:07he is good for the economy
28:08just not American.
28:10Trump also said this week
28:11he'd consider pulling
28:12the US out of NATO
28:13saying,
28:14I always knew
28:14they were a paper tiger
28:15and then added
28:16and Putin knows that too
28:17by the way.
28:18Get a room.
28:21A lot of countries
28:22around the world
28:22are now struggling
28:23to deal with
28:24the current energy crisis.
28:25Sri Lanka have introduced
28:26a four day working week.
28:27News anchors in Thailand
28:29took off their jackets
28:30on air
28:30and their government
28:31have told officials
28:32to wear short sleeve shirts
28:34without neck ties.
28:35But have a look
28:36at Bangkok's weather
28:37for the next week.
28:38It's like 37.
28:40They should be wearing
28:41short sleeves anyway.
28:43Are you guys worried
28:44about the energy crisis?
28:46I mean,
28:47anything with crisis in
28:48it gets my alarm bells ringing.
28:50Yeah.
28:52Yeah, for sure.
28:55He knows things.
28:57Good man.
28:57He knows.
28:58Good man.
28:59Mental health,
29:00Cuban Missile.
29:02Cost of living.
29:03Cost of living crisis.
29:04All of them.
29:05One woman was spotted
29:09filling Sainsbury's bags
29:10with petrol
29:10and storing them
29:11in the boot of her car.
29:13Sainsbury's bags.
29:14That's the unbelievable image.
29:16I think putting petrol
29:17in a plastic bag
29:18really shows where you stand
29:19on climate change.
29:24Fuck you, Grafenberg.
29:27Ducas said,
29:28is it OK?
29:28The King's visit to the US
29:29is going to be very awkward.
29:31Yeah, so this week
29:32it was confirmed
29:32the King and Queen state visit
29:33is going to take place next month
29:34even though Trump spent
29:36a lot of this week
29:36slagging off Keir Starmer.
29:38In fact,
29:38Trump even stated
29:39that the King
29:40would have backed him
29:41over the war in Iran.
29:43His exact words were,
29:44I like him.
29:45I always liked him as a prince.
29:46He's a good man.
29:47A great representative
29:48for your country.
29:49I think he would have taken
29:50a very different stand
29:51but he doesn't do that.
29:52I mean,
29:53he's a great gentleman.
29:54I don't think Charles
29:55would have taken
29:56a different stand
29:56over the war.
29:56I don't think so either.
29:58He talks to plants.
29:59Yeah, poop.
30:00You know what I mean?
30:01His car runs on biofuels.
30:03He's kind.
30:04His favourite hobby
30:04is angling.
30:05That's not a warmonger,
30:06that's a fishmonger.
30:10You've met the King, right?
30:11I have, I have.
30:12Is he the kind of guy
30:12that would be like,
30:13yeah, get in there?
30:14No, he would not.
30:15And the poor soul
30:16that has to go and sit
30:18and break bread with Trump,
30:19I know he's met
30:20lots of despots
30:21in his life
30:23but I don't know
30:23how you get through that.
30:24Do you just kind of
30:25sit there thinking,
30:26soon I can go home
30:27to Camilla
30:27and watch the racing
30:29with a gin and tonic.
30:30Is that how you get through it?
30:32I don't know.
30:32Well, is it true also
30:33the King can't really
30:34give an opinion
30:34on whether he'd go to war, right?
30:36No, he's not allowed.
30:36And Donald Trump knows that.
30:37Of course he does
30:38so he's just...
30:38He's just baiting.
30:40They've got mutual acquaintances.
30:42His brother.
30:47That's very true.
30:55The Guardian's photo editor
30:57obviously had a little bit
30:58of fun this week.
30:59It looked like they were
31:00purposely choosing photos
31:01that made the King
31:01look sceptical of Trump.
31:03There was this one.
31:05Are they passing drugs?
31:09Cheers for that, Donald.
31:10I really needed that, Parker.
31:12The Guardian also ran
31:14with this perfectly captured shot.
31:17It looks like the King's going
31:19ooh, and he's just seeing Trump
31:21like zipper bollock in his zip.
31:25He's only trying to get a sock out
31:26and all.
31:28It looks like they're struggling
31:29for an answer on Celebrity Pointless.
31:33Ooh, you forgot to Captain Harland.
31:36Ooh.
31:38There actually is a photo
31:39of Charles talking to a plant.
31:42The scramble for fuel
31:43is going to test all of us.
31:44So Josh and Alex have come up
31:45with a way to get us prepared.
31:46Yes, we have.
31:47So, Hills, basically,
31:48as soon as we saw the image
31:49of a woman putting petrol
31:50in Sainsbury's bags,
31:51we basically thought
31:52this could fuel some hilarity.
31:55Oh, yeah.
31:55That's good.
31:56Huh?
31:56Huh?
31:57Huh?
31:57And more to the point,
31:59more to the point,
32:00pad out the show.
32:02So, we're going to put on,
32:03we've got to make special
32:05petrol pump hats for this.
32:08And Alex has got a jingle made.
32:09Would you like to cue the jingle, Alex?
32:11Let's play.
32:17You've got to patrol with it.
32:19You've got to feel your bag.
32:30OK.
32:31Here we are in our petrol pumps.
32:35Me and Alex are two petrol pumps.
32:36As you can see,
32:37I've got green on my face
32:38because I am unleaded.
32:40Yes, and as you can see,
32:42I'm Diesel,
32:42so I've got a black hat on
32:44and I'm...
32:45Do you know what, actually?
32:46Shall we just continue with this?
32:50I'm going to get cancelled.
32:51It is Hilsie versus LeRoyne
32:53and I can tell you
32:54that this couldn't be more important, Josh.
32:56Do you know why?
32:57Why?
32:57Because there's a very special prize on offer.
33:00Oh!
33:02Right, so here's what you have to do.
33:03You have to get as much
33:05highly flammable petrol
33:06in shopping bags
33:08across our tricky assault course
33:10from one end of the forecourt
33:12to the other.
33:13It's that simple.
33:15Hilsie, we ask you,
33:16it's the forecourt,
33:17so please don't use your mobile.
33:18Absolutely.
33:19And LeRoyne,
33:20please don't light up.
33:21I don't know how...
33:23OK, then, let's talk you
33:24through the course.
33:25First, you must fill your bag
33:27at the petrol pump over there
33:28that'll have a street value
33:29of about eight grand at the moment.
33:31And then you've got to negotiate
33:32your way through
33:32the mountain of charcoal bouquets
33:34and then slalom
33:35in and out of the
33:36caution wet floor signs.
33:38Grab yourself a bunch
33:40of shitty flowers
33:40that you might be buying
33:41for a family member
33:42you don't like.
33:43You'll buy a scratch card
33:45from an under-motivated
33:46forecourt attendant.
33:48Finally,
33:49pour your amazing petrol
33:51into the car boot.
33:52The person who fills
33:53their car boot
33:53with the most petrol
33:54is the winner.
33:56Capisce?
33:57Yeah.
33:58Cool.
33:58Take your positions, please.
34:00Over there.
34:01There you go.
34:02Let's kick it off
34:02for our contestant.
34:03You got this head.
34:04I'll get this head.
34:09Are you ready?
34:10Ready.
34:10Three, two, one.
34:13Pump it!
34:14Oh, here we go.
34:15There we go.
34:16They're pumping away now.
34:17Who do you fancy to win this, Alex?
34:19I think Kelsey's struggling
34:21already.
34:21He's not having this.
34:22He seems like Lorraine's not
34:23messing about, is he?
34:24Lorraine's got this.
34:25He's worked in a petrol station
34:27before.
34:29Lorraine feels like
34:29somebody's siphoned petrol
34:31with a, uh,
34:31open price.
34:33I'll be honest,
34:34this bit's lasting longer
34:35than we'd anticipated.
34:37Not the first time
34:38we've said that.
34:41Just go for the two,
34:42two hands if you need it.
34:43There you go.
34:44You need your bags.
34:44Let's go.
34:45Here we go.
34:46All right.
34:46Let's go over the chapel.
34:47Go on, go on, go on.
34:48In and out.
34:49We're brought to it.
34:49Go on, go on, go on, go on.
34:51Here's get your flowers.
34:52Get your flowers away.
34:53Get your scratch car, please.
34:55Oh, two bunches.
34:56Oh, Lorraine's a romantic.
34:57Grab your scratch card.
34:58Me.
34:59That'll do.
35:00Yep.
35:01Okay, thank you.
35:01Grab your scratch card.
35:02Fill it up.
35:03Fill it up.
35:04Fill it up.
35:04Fill it up.
35:05Fill it up.
35:05Fill it up.
35:06Fill it up.
35:06Fill it up.
35:07Oh, my God.
35:08Oh, there.
35:09It's the Biotto.
35:10Right, right, right.
35:11Who's going to win?
35:11Who's going to win?
35:12Oh, my word.
35:13Oh, my God, Lorraine.
35:14Oh, God, I need a wee so much.
35:17That's it.
35:18Oh, look.
35:19Look, I can tell you
35:20that our winner is
35:23Lorraine Kellogg!
35:24Oh, here we go.
35:25Oh, here we go.
35:26No, it kills him.
35:27Oh, I know.
35:28Oh, God, give it to Lorraine.
35:30It's Lorraine!
35:32And there is your
35:33bouquet of Kit Kat.
35:35Oh, no.
35:37Oh, Lorraine.
35:38Congratulations.
35:41It's going to have to go to VAR.
35:43Well, and more last night
35:44for you after the break
35:45as we take a look
35:45at the upcoming World Cup.
35:47But, Josh,
35:47if it's time to burn
35:48some of this petrol off,
35:49let's go for this.
35:50Right, everyone duck.
35:51We're going to go big
35:52on this burning.
35:53Three, two, one.
36:09Welcome back to the last night.
36:10We're joined by
36:11Josh Q and Lorraine Kelly.
36:12Time to talk football now,
36:13but before we do,
36:14let's welcome a man
36:14who's become an online sensation
36:16as the assistant manager
36:17of the Sunday League team
36:19Royal Oak FC.
36:20Please welcome Steve Bracknell.
36:33Hello, Steve.
36:35Lovely to have you here, Steve.
36:36Big game this weekend.
36:37You want to tell everyone,
36:38explain for everyone
36:39what the game is.
36:40It's being billed
36:41as the biggest game
36:42in Sunday League history.
36:44Mm-hmm.
36:45I've billed it,
36:46that'll be frank.
36:47But, yeah,
36:483,000 people
36:49are coming to watch
36:51two pub teams
36:51playing a football match
36:53on Easter Sunday
36:54at 2 p.m.
36:54Who are the pub teams?
36:56Royal Oak,
36:56my team,
36:57I'm assistant manager.
36:58Let's not get
36:58unguppon titles, mate.
37:02I'm the assistant host, mate,
37:03don't worry about it.
37:06No comment.
37:08And there's no love lost.
37:10And for the people
37:11who can't make it on the day,
37:12can they watch it?
37:14I'm allowed to mention
37:15BBC, aren't I?
37:17I mean, who knows these days,
37:18but, yeah, go for it.
37:23Don't get me involved in that.
37:26The BBC have kindly agreed
37:29to live stream it
37:30to the Games Gone YouTube channel.
37:32Amazing.
37:32We're going to have people
37:33from all around Globe
37:36watching 22 overweight blokes
37:39trying to put Ballick back at them.
37:41And look, I understand
37:42you're a big fan of Alex Brooker
37:43so much so you've written
37:44a chant for him.
37:45Last night,
37:46I spent an hour
37:47in the shower naked.
37:48Well, I've always naked
37:49in the shower, but...
37:51..singing about Alex.
37:52And Nick is going,
37:53Stephen, are you all right?
37:54I'm all right, love.
37:56Would you like to hear it?
37:57I'd love to hear it, please.
37:58Yeah!
38:00It's to the tune of
38:02marching in two by two.
38:04Oh.
38:05He'll never play
38:06in a football team,
38:08they said.
38:08They said.
38:09They were always making jokes
38:11about his leg.
38:13His leg.
38:14Now, making jokes
38:15is how he gets paid
38:16and now he's playing
38:17in soccer, eh?
38:18Oh, love, broker.
38:20England's number nine.
38:34Oh my God.
38:44You're a national treasure, and I mean that.
38:46Thank you so much. I was like, make a wish. Thank you.
38:51And now, Josh Pugh, you play for the partially-sided England futsal team.
38:56I do, yeah.
38:56And you got a visit from an important manager.
38:59Yeah, before a tournament in Turkey, we were training in Manchester to motivate the lads.
39:04Our manager brought in a special guest and introduced him as Gareth.
39:08No surname. Didn't give a surname.
39:09Obviously, the lads are visually impaired. We couldn't see that Gareth Southgate was stood.
39:17And we were just very underwhelmed.
39:22He's got, like, a shirt on. We think he worked for the hotel.
39:28Any questions for Gareth? Well, my room key's not working.
39:35First and second name we need.
39:40And look, Lorraine, I understand you're going to be, like, we've got the World Cup coming up.
39:43Yes.
39:44I understand you're going to be one of the games.
39:46Yes, we're going to the Morocco game.
39:47Well, hopefully I'm going, because you know there's that thing where if you've been horrible about Donald Trump.
39:52Yes.
39:52So I might get, I was hoping that we'd be Canada or Mexico, but we're not.
39:56Yeah.
39:57And I'm just worried that, you know, when I get there they wouldn't let me in.
40:01Because I might have said a bad thing about Donald Trump.
40:03I think the nicest thing I said was he was a twat.
40:06And that was me being nice.
40:08That was me being nice.
40:10I'm here.
40:11I'm here.
40:13I'm here.
40:14In her bed.
40:14Is there any message you'd like to give to the Scotland team ahead of the World Cup?
40:18I just so happen to be sitting on this.
40:20I would wave this around and say, the famous thing is, no Scotland, no party.
40:25No Scotland, no party.
40:27It's true.
40:28It's true.
40:29It's true.
40:29It's true.
40:30It's true.
40:30It's true.
40:31It's true.
40:32It's true.
40:33I'm so happy you didn't keep that and our Josh does with his socks.
40:38I'm just going to wear it.
40:40And look Steve, we asked you ahead of coming here tonight if you could prepare a little bit
40:43of a speech for the England team.
40:44You gave me 24 hour, to be frank.
40:46Yeah, to be fair, to be honest, it's more time than we take to write the show.
40:52So, the stage is yours.
40:56Go our stage.
41:04We were all young kids once upon a time.
41:07We had dreams.
41:09Big dreams.
41:11I never laid in bed at night dreaming about being an electrician.
41:15No, he wanted to be astronauts who fly to the moon.
41:18But he couldn't.
41:22Some of us wanted to play for England in a World Cup final.
41:26And in two months time, some of you lads have got the chance to make that a reality.
41:32A World Cup final, I mean.
41:33We're not sending Annie Maguire to the moon.
41:36I hope not anyway we need him.
41:39All I ask of you lads is to keep dreaming.
41:42Listen, I can forgive a bad pass, a penalty miss.
41:45But what I cannot forgive is the inability to believe we can do it.
41:51Well, you're not as sure as that.
41:55We live in divisive times.
41:57And the opportunities for this country to come together are few and far between.
42:02It was Gallagher's last summer that brought us together.
42:05Me and our Nicky had the best day of his life.
42:06Unbelievable.
42:08But now it's your turn.
42:10So go and play your heart's heart.
42:11Not for me.
42:12Not for Whittacombe.
42:13Not for Brooker.
42:14Do it for kids up and down country who are still dreaming.
42:18And if football comes home, and I mean this from the bottom of me heart.
42:21If it comes home, I'm banging a bargain bucket.
42:25You know what I mean?
42:26Gravy coleslaw, viennetta beans, job line, it's on me and I mean that.
42:30So get up and down them.
42:32Play for that badge.
42:34But more importantly, let's try and stay together as one, alright?
42:38Steve.
42:40Yeah!
42:47We're up to the last week for you after the break.
42:49Josh will up after the last seven days.
42:50And we're going to unveil an anthem for the World Cup.
42:53We'll see you in a little bit.
43:07Welcome back to Last Leg.
43:09We're joined by Josh Pugh, Lorraine Kelly and Steve Bracknell.
43:12Last week on the show we met someone by the name of Becky Coleman.
43:15Now Becky was aiming to become the first wheelchair user to row the Oxford and Cambridge boat race course, arms
43:20only.
43:21Yesterday she smashed it in 33 minutes and sent us this picture with the little hands in a boat that
43:27we gave her.
43:29Becky's here tonight.
43:30Becky, congratulations.
43:31Well done.
43:44I also want to give a shout out to the Keithley Cougars rugby league team if I can.
43:47Last year on the show, you might remember Alistair Campbell challenged Keithley to help out the Ukrainian rugby league team.
43:53Keithley then provided them with their official kit, offered to fly a bunch of teenage rugby league players from Ukraine
44:01to the UK for a week.
44:02The Ukrainian kids landed into Leeds Bradford this afternoon.
44:05They're going to spend the weekend in Keithley and Castleford playing and watching rugby league, which is awesome.
44:10They're also taking a day trip to Haworth, I think that's how you pronounce it, home of the Bronte sisters.
44:16Because you know how much rugby league players love the Bronte sisters.
44:20You can hear them now.
44:21Keith Cliff!
44:22Keith Cliff!
44:24Oh we all joined, I didn't expect you to join.
44:26This is the greatest audience of all.
44:38Josh has been orbiting the last seven days, what have you got?
44:41Okay, would you like...
44:43You've got to read it off the card.
44:45Would you like to see an incredible clip of what could possibly go wrong when collecting your food at the
44:50end of a night?
44:51Out.
44:51Yes please.
45:02It's the way he tries to save it.
45:05It's such a journey then.
45:06Would you like to see some awkward footage of poor old Craig Doyle being interrupted during rugby teams warm up?
45:13Yes.
45:14You only can.
45:15So we said to David, a new member of the team, you need an initiation.
45:18Usually it's a song with a boss and you're going to dance up and disgusting.
45:21I'm ready to sing to be fair.
45:22You're going to kick this ball?
45:23Yeah, it's going to be a debut defining moment I think.
45:25You're a pro footballer, watch it guys.
45:27Let's have a look.
45:28Brave man.
45:31Get there!
45:32It's good effort.
45:33It's good effort.
45:34These chaps are giving me this.
45:35Would you sign him, Geoff?
45:37Would you sign him?
45:38I'm not fucking on.
45:39I'll start it.
45:40Okay.
45:41You're not happy about that.
45:42Okay, apologies to Lagos.
45:46All right, we are about to end the show with a song for the World Cup.
45:49But before we do, would you please thank our guests, Josh Pugh,
45:53Wayne Kelly,
45:55and Steve Bracknell,
45:59and my co-host Josh Winnicum,
46:01and Alex Brooker.
46:05We'll be back later in the year with more Last Leg,
46:07but right now with the World Cup coming up,
46:09we thought we'd give a shout out to all the countries competing
46:12and wish them luck with every single part of their journey.
46:31And thank you for listening.
46:41Not Wales that they went with failure, but in June
46:47Scotland might dance to a different tune
46:51Tune in to sea-rich nation
46:53Gets to USA vibration
46:56Getting into America
46:58Getting into America
47:01Has become a massive pain in the ass
47:08Plus the urban Herzegovina
47:11Norway, Switzerland, Portugal, maybe France
47:17Even Croatia have got a chance
47:23Sweden, Jordan and Ghana
47:26Brazil, Ivory Coast and Uzbekistan
47:31We're not gonna put money on Iran
47:36Which country's gonna be central
47:38Wipe all the ass from your eyeballs
47:41Getting into America
47:43Getting into America
47:47Has become a massive pain in the ass
47:52Thanks for watching The Last Leg
47:53My name's Adam Hills
47:54We'll see you later in the air
47:56For the next leg
47:57I love you
48:00I love you
48:00We'll see you later in the air
48:03One hand
48:05A good Kommentar
48:06Someone
48:06A good time
48:06Keep the time
48:07Tony
48:08A good time
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