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00:01Tonight, from across Australia and around the world, it's time to look back and unpack
00:07the week from The Cheap Seats, with special guest, Australian comedy legend, Glenn Robbins.
00:14And now, here are your hosts, Melody Bracelow and Tim McDonough.
00:19Good evening, thank you for joining us in The Cheap Seats.
00:23Great to have you company, so much to get through, a busy week of news.
00:27Let's start overseas, with that royal visit to the White House, which began with Camilla
00:32not knowing where to stand.
00:35And ended with Camilla not knowing where to stand.
00:39It's awkward though, because the King can only sort of move one step forward, left, or right,
00:45but the Queen can go anywhere.
00:47Exactly.
00:48In Camilla's defence, the name tag on the bottom read Diana, so she was a bit confused.
00:51That is very confusing.
00:53This was the state visit of Charles and Camilla to the United States.
00:57And the royals were welcomed in style.
00:59There was a traditional viewing of the troops, a 21-gun salute.
01:0322 if you count the assassination attempt, but he's fine, they're all fine.
01:09Charles then addressed a joint setting of Congress.
01:11And I love how US TV introduced the King to Americans.
01:15When the King speaks, you should think of him as if he were Gandalf in Lord of the Rings,
01:20or Dumbledore in Harry Potter.
01:23Of course, the difference is Dumbledore loved Harry.
01:26Yeah, OK.
01:29The royal trip continued, and it was then on to the lavish state dinner.
01:34The King's gift, the bell from HMS Trump, a British sub that defended Australia in World
01:40War II.
01:41Did you ever need to get hold of us, or just give us a ring?
01:45The royal bell for the royal bell end.
01:48It's beautiful.
01:49No, that is the original Taco Bell, which Trump is very keen to have.
01:53By the way, the King's just doing prop gear?
01:56Prop comedy.
01:57The lowest form of comedy.
01:58The lowest form of comedy.
02:00Let's move on.
02:01Excited Americans got a glimpse of royalty.
02:03As the King and Queen's motorcade departed tonight, a hand emerged from a limo and waved.
02:10But whose was it?
02:12There's no way of knowing.
02:13Well, it wasn't the King's hand, because we've got that here.
02:19The lowest form of comedy.
02:23High five.
02:24Oh, God.
02:25Let's move on.
02:27And the President was next in Florida.
02:29And forget King Charles, Trump welcomed TV royalty.
02:32One of the things that President Trump does is he tries to solve problems that nobody else
02:38is even working on.
02:40Because he's the one starting the problems.
02:43No.
02:44No, he's solving problems.
02:46The President is solving problems every single day.
02:49A lion, a giraffe, a bear, and a shark.
02:53They say, which one is the bear?
02:58Madagascar 5 sounds awful.
03:00Sounds terrible, doesn't it?
03:01Look, he's obsessed with these cognitive tests.
03:04You know, I'm the only President...
03:06I'm the only President to take a cognitive test.
03:09That's not a brag!
03:11That's not a good thing!
03:12I'm the only President to take an eye test.
03:14That means I have the best eyes in the world!
03:17If you think taking a cognitive test is a brag, that's why you need a cognitive test!
03:21In fairness to the President, though, these questions, they're tricky.
03:24These are tough questions, you know.
03:26They say, take a number, any number, okay, I'll take 99.
03:29Okay, 99.
03:30Multiply times 9, okay?
03:32Times 9, okay.
03:34Divide it by 3, good.
03:35I'm getting confused.
03:36Add 4,293, that's good.
03:40I need a calculator.
03:41Divide by 2.
03:42Let's start again.
03:45Subtract 93.
03:47Divide by 9.
03:50What is your answer?
03:51Sorry, can you repeat the question?
03:53Sorry.
03:54You actually worked it out, didn't you?
03:55What did you get?
03:56I worked out that you can write boobs.
04:01That is right.
04:02That is right.
04:05What do we say about prop comedy?
04:08Let's move on.
04:09The situation in the Middle East continues to bubble over.
04:11And an interesting update this week from Iran.
04:14They're contemplating measures like suicide dolphins.
04:18Kamikaze dolphins.
04:20Pretty sure those are the dolphins John West rejects.
04:24Look, we did get this update from Iranian state television.
04:28Our negotiations with the United States are not conventional or ordinary.
04:33Speaking of not conventional.
04:35Why are they coming to us from Hogwarts?
04:37Yes.
04:38Directed by Wes Anderson.
04:39It's amazing.
04:40It's one of the rooms being revealed this week on The Blockade.
04:44So again.
04:46It's good.
04:47So, with the war in the Middle East, the fuel crisis and next week's federal budget,
04:52there are naturally a lot of questions for the Prime Minister.
04:55Spicy or mild?
04:57Spicy.
04:58I like hot food.
05:00Extra garlic or no garlic?
05:02Sorry to interrupt your Uber Eats order.
05:04Yes.
05:04There are things going on in the world.
05:07And also, extra garlic or no garlic?
05:10Surely there's a middle ground.
05:12Yes.
05:12Some garlic.
05:14Some garlic.
05:15Look, there are some very serious questions.
05:17Changing gear.
05:18Mavs or White Lotus?
05:19What are we doing?
05:20What are we doing?
05:22The garlic is good.
05:23It keeps Pauline Hanson away.
05:25The fuel crisis is affecting everyone, even...
05:28A circus troupe is walking a tightrope of its own as the industry is squeezed by high fuel prices.
05:35Surely you could fit quite a few clowns in one tiny car.
05:40Let's move on.
05:42And there are other issues on the agenda.
05:43Exactly.
05:44Not the only sector affected by the fuel crisis.
05:47The world's biggest condom maker says it's going to have to increase prices by up to 30%.
05:53Now, when they say the world's biggest condom maker, do they mean they make the most condoms?
05:59No, they're enormous.
06:00They make one enormous condom.
06:04Well, enormous for some.
06:07Look, this begs the obvious question.
06:09Tiramisu or Viennetto?
06:10No, sorry.
06:12Let's move on.
06:13Japan's Prime Minister, Sanae Takeichi, has arrived in Australia for her first official visit since taking office.
06:19She was greeted at Canberra Airport by Foreign Affairs Minister Penny Wong last night.
06:23And I'm sure we'll have those pictures for you in a moment.
06:27Would you call that greeting?
06:29I'm not sure that's a greeting.
06:31It was a greeting.
06:31She got welcomed by Harold Holt, which was a lovely touch.
06:34A lovely touch.
06:35Yes, the Japanese Prime Minister is down under.
06:38She spoke at a press conference at Parliament House.
06:47This was a very important meeting with Australia committing to supply Japan with critical minerals,
06:53including gallium, nickel and graphite.
06:55Meanwhile, Japan have agreed to continue to supply Australia with Pokemon Ruby, Sapphire and Emerald.
07:01Critical minerals.
07:02And then it was into the Cabinet Office for high-level discussions on energy, global affairs, the Indo-Pacific.
07:09What else?
07:09My honeymoon destination was actually to the Great Barrier Reef.
07:14And I did scuba diving with my husband.
07:17This trip could have been an email.
07:18What is the point of this?
07:20No, it was huge.
07:22It was even covered on Japanese TV.
07:24I was in Australia and I would like to attend to the President's meeting today.
07:28Now, if you're wondering what else is on Japanese news this week, this is no joke.
07:33Yes, I think there are many people who want to enjoy the Golden Week this year, but I would like
07:39to take care of it.
07:40Whoa!
07:41Whoa!
07:43Whoa!
07:44Whoa!
07:47Whoa!
07:48Whoa!
07:48Oh, my God!
07:49I think we have the translation.
07:51Which one is the bear?
07:52Exactly!
07:53We're going to show it for you tonight.
07:55Mr. Glenn Rubens is here, right after this.
08:08Welcome back to The Cheap Seat.
08:10And our special guest is standing by.
08:13This is Christine Keelback, who stepped out of a car following a night out and was swallowed by a sinkhole.
08:20Night out to a night in.
08:22There we go.
08:24Well, to be prepared for any situation, look no further than our sponsor, A.H.M. Insurance for People Things.
08:34It is so great to have them with us.
08:36It's great to have them on board.
08:38A person from Florida spotted this dog on a jet ski from their balcony and started recording.
08:46Making it even more unusual is the dog's owner towing the canine on a water jet propelled hoverboard.
08:53It's just good to see a dog on a lead.
08:55You know, under control.
08:57It is a kamikaze, Labrador.
08:59It's heading straight to the strata hall moves.
09:01Moving on.
09:02The Liberal Party has retained the state seat of Nepean on Victoria's Mornington Peninsula.
09:08Aha.
09:09Huge news this election.
09:11Yes.
09:12Bad news for One Nation.
09:14They poll pretty well, but their candidate, Darren Hurkus, didn't win in the end.
09:18Let's check in with Darren now.
09:20We'll just go live now to Darren Hurkus, the One Nation candidate in Nepean.
09:23He's about to speak to the function here.
09:26It's been amazing.
09:27You're probably all wondering why I'm holding toilet paper.
09:32No, it makes perfect sense to me.
09:34I don't know, Darren.
09:35Why are you holding toilet paper?
09:38It's to give to the Liberal Party for all the crap they've done on me.
09:43Liberal Party leaders are like nappies.
09:45You have to change them regularly for the same reason.
09:49There's more tools there in blue than there is at the Bunnings Warehouse.
09:53Boom, boom.
09:55Yeah.
09:57Jokes aside.
09:58Jokes aside.
09:58Jokes aside.
10:00Don't worry.
10:01They were.
10:02He's now replacing Kyle Sanderlands.
10:04Yeah.
10:05Hurkus and Jackie O.
10:06It's going to be great.
10:06Can we look at that again?
10:08Just the picture of it.
10:09Like, he's got a photo of himself like he's performing at his own funeral.
10:13What's going on?
10:14What a way it was.
10:15He'll be back.
10:17Hey, voters had different reasons for supporting their various candidates.
10:19And the reason is Australian values.
10:23Because I want change.
10:24Just finished golf and had to show up here.
10:26But shit round, otherwise good day.
10:30Shit round, otherwise good day would be a great campaign slogan, to be honest.
10:33But it's all about the biggest.
10:35Yes.
10:35Some locals used their democratic right to express themselves.
10:39For no jet ski party.
10:41But you're not actually a candidate.
10:43No.
10:44But I've got ideas.
10:48I love it.
10:50Hey, speaking of big issues.
10:51North Queensland politician Bob Catter has long argued for a cull of the state's rapidly
10:56rising crocodile population with his crazy like a fox method of getting his message out.
11:02He's going to hit them with jet skis, I think.
11:04In North Queensland, that is a cognitive test.
11:06You've got lobster, you've got calamari, you've got...
11:09Bob was out there making his message clear.
11:12While also sporting his new line of shorts that carry the slogan,
11:16I've punched blokes in the mouth for saying that.
11:20Interesting, they're made in Lebanon, would you by?
11:22Oh, that is so cool.
11:23Yeah, yeah.
11:24Not quite as bad.
11:26Oh, don't say that.
11:27I've punched blokes in the mouth.
11:30Well, here at 10, we've got the big exclusive.
11:32We managed to speak to Bob Catter.
11:34Do you like the taste?
11:36Yeah, yeah.
11:36And I'll often eat crocodile meat, you know, if it's on the menu.
11:41And as I say, slow in cholesterol.
11:43It's a very healthy sort of diet.
11:46All right, Bob, great to talk to you, as always.
11:49God bless all the listeners.
11:51You're on television, Bob.
11:52What are you talking about?
11:54All right, moving on.
11:55And it's time now to welcome our very special guest.
11:59Mr. Glenn Robin.
12:00That's Glenn Robin.
12:02Glenn, there he is.
12:03Mr. Glenn Robin.
12:12We are so excited to welcome Australian comedy royalty, Mr. Glenn Robin.
12:43Thank you so much for joining us.
12:44God, I'm a legend, aren't I?
12:45I just watched that tape.
12:47I'm good.
12:47I'm really good.
12:48Thank you for bringing those highlights in.
12:50Yes.
12:51I did some maths last night.
12:54Did you?
12:54Put your two ages together, and I'm still older than you.
12:59Wow.
12:59Wow.
13:00Well, it's not hard.
13:01Tim is 12, so...
13:04Well done.
13:05We'll put the abacus away for a second, Glenn, and say,
13:07it's a good opening.
13:08I've started out well.
13:10More of that to come, folks.
13:11It's just, you know...
13:12No, Glenn, we have been trying to get you on our show.
13:15No, you haven't.
13:17It's a running joke that you haven't invited me on.
13:20I was day one with you in the office in your little typewriter.
13:23I was back there, and I said,
13:25that boy, that boy, get into my dressing room straight away,
13:28and I'll make sure he has a career, and look where he is now.
13:34Yeah.
13:34And thank you for your mentoring.
13:37That's what we like to call it.
13:38No, we have been trying...
13:41Stop trying to cancel yourself,
13:43and we have been trying to get you on for a while
13:46because you are one of our favourites.
13:47You're one of this country's favourites.
13:49We have so much to chat to you about.
13:50I'm excited.
13:51Not just in your back catalogue,
13:52but what you've got on currently,
13:53because, ladies and gentlemen,
13:54Glenn Robbins has a brand-new show.
13:55Glenn and Mick, Celebrity Intervention.
13:58And good on you for promoting Cross Network.
14:02I mean, this is the 10 Network.
14:03Yes.
14:03And I'm on the 7 Network.
14:05It's a different network.
14:06Now, for those of us who can't stand Channel 7,
14:08what is the show?
14:10Well, for those of us who haven't seen it,
14:12what is the show all about?
14:13It's an intervention.
14:14It's a bit, this is your life.
14:16A little bit roast, it's a little bit
14:17because it's on Channel 7, Dr Harry.
14:22So, there are celebrities out there
14:24who are doing some things that need an intervention.
14:26I go out and get them, I hold their hand,
14:28and we take them through it,
14:29and they come out a better person.
14:31It's a community service.
14:32It's a community service.
14:34A bit like what you do.
14:37You might not be saying that at the end of this
14:38because we've been watching, haven't we?
14:40Yeah, it's great, and we saw this.
14:42OK, that's across there, like that, like that.
14:45Lift up, and...
14:48No, there we go.
14:51Now, let's just go around the set.
14:52So, there's nothing on the set.
14:54Nothing on you, nothing on me.
14:57The ankles.
15:04Ball went in.
15:05Pants down.
15:06I'm not going to get my pants down.
15:08I don't feel good.
15:10Do I just say, all out of context,
15:14you don't know what the lead-up is,
15:15you don't know what the joke is,
15:16I'm having sex with Dr Chris's leg,
15:19you know, in context,
15:21that would have been a lot funnier, seriously.
15:23It is very funny.
15:24We do notice something in that package,
15:25and it's something that's...
15:26Something in that package.
15:29Specifically your package,
15:30because there is a theme in your body of work, Glenn,
15:32that your body makes a lot of appearances.
15:46Can I say, that arse paid my mortgage
15:51and bought me a new set of golf clubs every year,
15:53so I don't mind.
15:55To be honest, we think if anyone needs an intervention...
15:58Look out, I can feel like...
15:59It might be...
16:00Oh, look out, look out.
16:01Can you stick around?
16:03Let's stick around and do a bit of an intervention with me.
16:07We've got to take a break.
16:08Actually, before we do take a break,
16:09speaking of commercials...
16:10Yeah.
16:11..you got your start in a commercial.
16:13I did.
16:13I hope you haven't got it.
16:14We do.
16:15I think we do have it.
16:15You know, there's more to Just Jeans than Just Dillings.
16:18I like these Just Jeans stretch cords.
16:20That's right, stretch cords.
16:22From top names like Nemo, Abco and Lee.
16:25Now, great looks are one thing,
16:27but great fit is another.
16:28All right.
16:30APPLAUSE
16:34I am very good, aren't I?
16:36Can we see that final shot again?
16:38No, please.
16:40That is a porn star in the making.
16:43Seriously.
16:44I just love it.
16:45Stretch cords.
16:46That's right, stretch cords.
16:47No-one's going, what?
16:49Stretch cords?
16:51Do they still make stretch cords after that ad?
16:53That was 1983.
16:55Wow.
16:56Yeah.
16:56Take us back.
16:57What was it like in the olden days?
17:00Because the year before,
17:01our cords were so uncomfortable and not flexible,
17:04but then along came stretch cords.
17:06Along they came, and there I am,
17:08and I'm wearing them tonight.
17:09Yes!
17:10Sit down, sit down.
17:11Sit down, sit down.
17:12We're just glad you're wearing clothes.
17:14We are just back.
17:15Can you stick around?
17:16Yes, please, I'd love to.
17:17We'd love to.
17:18More with the wonderful Glenn Robbins
17:19on the other side of this.
17:32Welcome back up to The Cheap Seats,
17:34and we're joined by Glenn Robbins.
17:37Glenn, let's go right back to the beginning.
17:40Oh, please.
17:41Where did it all start?
17:42Can you remember your first time performing?
17:44I did those commercials,
17:46and then I did a thing on Prisoner.
17:50Would you remember that program?
17:52It was a...
17:52A classic Australian drama series?
17:55Yeah, yeah, and my acting was so bad,
17:58they shot me in the end.
17:59Really?
18:00Yeah.
18:01Well, no, I was meant to be shot.
18:02The year is 1984,
18:03so one year after the discovery of stretch cords.
18:07Incredible, incredible.
18:08And here we are in Prisoner.
18:10You played a policeman out on a stakeout.
18:13Let's take a look.
18:17It's going to be a long, bloody night.
18:19Yeah.
18:20They don't get too many good-looking swords around here,
18:21do they?
18:30That is acting, ladies and gentlemen.
18:36Have you still got it, Glenn?
18:38I have.
18:39If I went to take a shot and went...
18:42Now, did you notice in that take...
18:44Yeah.
18:44We did notice.
18:46Something that I did to get a bit more airtime on my head.
18:50Watch this again and just note that even after Glenn had died,
18:53he was still trying to find the camera.
18:57He's died that way and then...
19:08Well, speaking of lovable characters,
19:10you then went on to create some of this country's most iconic, beloved faces.
19:14Kel on Kath and Kim.
19:16Unbelievable.
19:22Well, like, one of this country's most loved pieces of television.
19:25What was it like being part of that ensemble?
19:27Oh, fantastic.
19:28Girls were wonderful.
19:30They used to struggle a bit with breaking up.
19:36And Peter and I would not know what they were talking about.
19:39And they would just start laughing hysterically.
19:42I would only lose it when I would dance with Kath.
19:47And I would have to turn around and dance the other way.
19:51I was laughing so much at her dancing.
19:53Because when you dance with Jane Turner, it's just...
19:56You can't control it.
19:58So, yeah, but that was the only time.
19:59But, yeah.
20:00I think we have some vision of that dancing scene.
20:04APPLAUSE
20:09They are turning away.
20:12But those legs...
20:21What are you doing?
20:24Wow.
20:26APPLAUSE
20:27Cal was getting his mojo back
20:31and that was the time that he found her attractive again.
20:35Thank God for the stretch cords, am I right?
20:36Because you are able to move.
20:38Unbelievable.
20:39You've had so many iconic characters.
20:41There was, of course, Russell Coyne.
20:42Exactly.
20:43Absolutely iconic.
20:44APPLAUSE
20:47Which, of course, you worked on with...
20:49Tom Gleisner.
20:49Tom Gleisner, a friend of the show, our executive producer.
20:51And how did you and Tom get on?
20:53Because that was a match made in heaven.
20:56Well, Tom was...
20:56Partly because of the fact that you both died 20 years ago.
20:59No.
20:59No.
21:01Tom and I got on very well.
21:03There was only one time we had a disagreement.
21:05Really?
21:05Yeah.
21:06And, yeah...
21:07Over money?
21:09OK, two times we had a disagreement.
21:12It was where the script said I had to shoot a scientist
21:18in the face with an extinguisher.
21:22Right, OK.
21:23And I went, Tom, I don't think that's funny.
21:25I think it's funnier if we shoot her in the vagina.
21:28LAUGHTER
21:32Because you've always been a champion of women.
21:33Yeah, it's OK.
21:35And Tom said, Regina...
21:37We had an argument about which way it was going to go.
21:39I think Regina's a failure of the paper.
21:41Oh, my God.
21:43Why don't we let her decide?
21:45Yeah.
21:48So, I just went, I reckon I can do the double.
21:51Oh, a trick shot.
21:52I can do a trick shot.
21:53And I got both in one take.
21:55Let's have a look.
21:56This is the activating button here.
21:58But first of all, you must pull the safety pin.
22:02Oh, oh.
22:02What?
22:03Oh, my God.
22:20LAUGHTER
22:20I've brought the tone of the show down a bit, haven't I?
22:22LAUGHTER
22:23Well, you and Tom worked out a lot of the scenes together
22:26and often you'd improvise and things would come to you.
22:30Is there a story about a time where you had a crocodile,
22:33you'd discovered a crocodile?
22:35Oh, no, we were in the car after a long day's shooting
22:37and Tom said to me,
22:39tomorrow we can have a four-foot frozen croc.
22:42What do you want to do with it?
22:43And I was a bit tired and I said,
22:45how about Russell get spitting on the cock?
22:48And Tom went...
22:49He's like, I reckon it should be the face.
22:50It should be the face.
22:53And Tom went, done.
22:54And the next day I was in a...
22:57They put a lump of wood down my pants
22:59and then Susanna Mott, the producer,
23:01was sewing a crocodile onto my groin
23:04and the rest is history.
23:05It feels like it's the breach of the Geneva Convention
23:07of hearing rights.
23:08But can we take a look?
23:11Just got to wait.
23:12Just move back.
23:13I'll draw into the shore a little bit.
23:15Draw back.
23:16Draw back.
23:18I'll just see if I...
23:19Yes, you do.
23:27Oh, my God.
23:29Wow.
23:30Yeah.
23:30That was the same croc that we used in another shot
23:34where it was meant to die and roll over
23:37and we couldn't get it to roll over.
23:39So we had to take it down to the petrol station
23:41and get it pumped up.
23:43We had the gun stick.
23:43With air?
23:44Yeah.
23:45Yeah.
23:46Got a bit of petrol and pumped a bit into the crocodile,
23:50took it back for the shot and it worked perfectly.
23:53What's the correct PSI for a reptile?
23:56Just imagine for a second that you're at the petrol station
23:58filling up and you see in the corner
24:00Glenn Robbins and Tom Gleisner
24:02air compressing a dead crocodile.
24:05That's unbelievable.
24:06Let's do it now.
24:07We've got a croc.
24:09Well, that's the thing.
24:09Sometimes things go wrong
24:11during the filming of Russell Coyne.
24:13Yes.
24:13Yes.
24:14Yes.
24:15Are you leaning towards something?
24:16I am leaning towards something.
24:18Because we do have this scene
24:20and I'm told, reliably told,
24:21that this scene doesn't unfold the way it was supposed to.
24:24Just because you're out in the bush
24:25doesn't mean you can't enjoy some of the creature comforts.
24:28What we've got here is a bush shower.
24:31Now, I filled it up with warm water.
24:32It's just a matter of turning that.
24:34The shower was meant to come straight off
24:36and go all over me
24:37and I couldn't get it off.
24:39So watch what happens here.
24:40I try to stay low so I don't reveal myself
24:42but I had to try and get up
24:43and then I turned it and it wouldn't come off
24:45so I start snapping.
24:46Now I start smacking it
24:48because it won't come off
24:49and then my arse comes out
24:51and then all too much.
24:55Wow.
24:59Yes.
25:00Brilliant.
25:01And that paid for my annual golf fees for that year.
25:06So the one time your arse was not meant to appear.
25:09That's what happened.
25:10Yeah, yeah, yeah.
25:11So we see Russell getting into a lot of trouble sometimes
25:14and the question that gets asked by a lot of people
25:17all the time is,
25:18do you do your own stunts?
25:19I do most of my own stunts, yes.
25:22At my age, it's amazing, isn't it,
25:23that I still do them.
25:25Yeah, so I'm quite proud to say that...
25:27So all of these stunts here, for example,
25:30this is all you.
25:31There's always one more 40 thistle to be sprayed
25:33before we knock this job on the head.
25:38That's you.
25:39That's you.
25:42That's you.
25:45That's you being impaled, is it?
25:47That's you.
25:48That's definitely you.
25:50I think I know where you're hitting here.
25:52Yeah, I think you do too
25:53because in a Cheap Seats exclusive,
25:56we can reveal that Glenn Robbins
25:57does not do any of his own stunts.
26:00Those stunts are performed by
26:02the Russell Coit Dummy,
26:05which has joined us on set.
26:07Wow.
26:09Wow.
26:11Sorry, I was just laughing
26:15because they were trying to shield it
26:17from the audience
26:17and they had a pillowcase over his head
26:19that looked like they were bringing in a hostage.
26:23This is a life-size Glenn Robbins
26:26Russell Coit Dummy.
26:27Yep, and we've had some times together.
26:33That's so amazing
26:34to have something like that.
26:35I know, it's weird.
26:36When I first saw it,
26:36I couldn't stop looking at it.
26:38It's bizarre.
26:39Who's funnier, do you think?
26:42I don't think you want to know the answer.
26:45Part of it because it's dressed as Chris Lilley
26:47at the moment.
26:52Can we get him to talk?
26:56Is that what you're learning towards?
26:57Would that be all right, go ahead.
26:58Yeah, maybe.
26:59Are we wrapping it up fairly soon?
27:00Fairly soon.
27:01Yeah, fairly soon.
27:02About five minutes ago.
27:04Maybe do a close-up of Russell Coit.
27:06Hey, Russell, can you give us
27:08one of your classic all-Aussie catchphrases?
27:11Time to hit the road.
27:15Well, Glenn.
27:17Oh, God.
27:19Thank you, not only for joining us on the desk,
27:22but for bringing so much light and laughter
27:24into the lives of so many Australians.
27:26I could be dead soon,
27:26so what are you going to do?
27:27What's going to happen?
27:28We thought, what better way to honour
27:30an incredible career
27:32than with this amazing piece of memorabilia
27:35of some of your body of work
27:36together at last.
27:40I'm incredibly touched, and that will go in a very, very special place.
27:45Ladies and gentlemen, would you please thank the wonderful Glenn Robbins!
28:06Time to talk all things showbiz.
28:08Would you please welcome the wonderful Mel Trasina!
28:13Hello, lovely to see you.
28:15Lovely to see you both.
28:16Big day for showbiz.
28:18Oh, my gosh, huge.
28:18It was Fashion's Night of Nights, the Met Gala.
28:23The theme for this year is costume art,
28:27and the dress code is fashion is art.
28:30Whatever happened to smart casual?
28:32Exactly.
28:34Let's look at some of the outfits.
28:36So this is Jordan Roth smuggling in his plus one.
28:39OK.
28:40It's giving kidnapping.
28:43I thought that was Glenn Robbins' dummy for a moment.
28:47Then we have Michael Braun modelling an apron I got from Big W.
28:51Mine says, kiss the chef.
28:54But all eyes were on Katy Perry.
28:57Yeah, when you've got the Met Gala at one,
28:59but fencing practised at two.
29:02So this was Katy Perry's look,
29:03and all the media outlets were scrambling to capture the moment
29:06she revealed her face.
29:08The ABC nailed it.
29:10When, you know, you can take inspiration...
29:11Oh, here we go, here we go, here we go.
29:12Oh!
29:13Oh!
29:13Come on, trust us.
29:15No!
29:16What a tease.
29:17That is Katy Perry.
29:18That is Katy Perry.
29:21The red carpet arrival caught my eye.
29:23So I find this really interesting,
29:25because this year's theme is costume art,
29:28and the dress code is fashion is art.
29:30What is going on?
29:32I think that's a robot.
29:33I think it is.
29:34Wow.
29:35Educating.
29:35Analysis.
29:37Fun fact, that robot uses less auto-tune than Charlie XCX does.
29:41Wow, that's amazing.
29:42Can we see that robot again?
29:44Yeah.
29:44It's giving Panasonic.
29:47Am I nailing the fashion terms?
29:50It's giving up.
29:55The celebrities looked incredible.
29:56I would say they did not disappoint.
29:59Dickie put it a little more harshly.
30:01Sam Smith has arrived, bringing some...
30:04I mean, yeah, they have.
30:05Sammy, bringing some 1920s glamour.
30:07He never fails to disappoint.
30:10He never fails to disappoint.
30:13I'm not angry, Sam, just disappointed.
30:16It's giving oxymoron.
30:19Well, there was one disappointing look that we noticed.
30:23Amanda Seyfried was another one that I saw,
30:25just kind of wearing a pink dress.
30:27And, sorry, that's just not good enough.
30:29A pink dress.
30:31I'm sorry, that's just not good enough, Maldressena.
30:37It's not good enough.
30:38You know me, I never fail to disappoint.
30:43There's tissues in here.
30:46No, it's lovely.
30:47I'm just glad that you survived the crash
30:48and that the airbags worked.
30:52You're not allowed to comment on a woman's airbags.
30:55Sorry.
30:56Sorry.
30:59It's giving HR terms like...
31:03Let's move on.
31:04OK, moving on from the Met Gala,
31:06let's take a look at the new season of SAS,
31:09yes, Australia versus England,
31:11which is my version of the Ashes.
31:14It's over on Seven.
31:15There's a new batch of celebrities
31:16tackling intensive army training
31:18and representing Australia.
31:19We have singer and actress Natalie Bassingflate,
31:22former maths bride Jessica Power.
31:24How did they get them?
31:28So busy.
31:29No, but there are some big names,
31:31including friend of the show, Ryan Maloney.
31:33And, of course, we all remember him from Neighbours,
31:35playing the lovable Toadie Rebeckie,
31:37and he is just as lovable on SAS.
31:39Use your cups to drink in here
31:41so you've always got a full fucking bottle.
31:46OK.
31:47Why is he doing an impression of my mum?
31:53Now, Neighbours was a hit in Australia and the UK,
31:55so naturally he became highly respected by his campmates.
31:58What's your name again?
32:00My name is fucking pissed off
32:02because now I've got two fucking wet things of clothes
32:05because people haven't fucking filled up their water bottle
32:07when all day I've been saying to do it.
32:10So, yeah, I'm pissed.
32:13And is there a Mrs fucking pissed off?
32:19Also joining this season's cast
32:21is retired Olympic swimmer Mac Horton,
32:23and I am busting to see how he faces challenges this season.
32:27Keep very still.
32:29Don't move.
32:39Fucking hell.
32:41Pissing like a rhinoceros.
32:45Is pissing like a rhinoceros a phrase?
32:50Technically, they piss backwards.
32:53Rhinos?
32:54Rhinos, they piss backwards.
32:55Whatever, I'm cultured.
32:57I just know these things.
32:59And now for some music news.
33:01The Billboard Women in Music Awards were on over the weekend.
33:04It's an annual event held to celebrate female artists.
33:08Tiana Taylor, who is portraying Dionne Warwick
33:10in an upcoming biopic,
33:11was presented with the prestigious Visionary Award.
33:14Let's see her acceptance speech.
33:16Can I get the telepromptor?
33:27Can I get the teleprompter?
33:31It's so inspiring.
33:34It's good to see women talk their truth.
33:37Clearly a man was in charge of the teleprompter.
33:40Okay, so she couldn't read her speech,
33:42but she handled the situation with grace,
33:44even when someone suggested that she ad-libbed.
33:46Ad-lib, my speech is cute.
33:47They're going to pull up this goddamn speech.
33:49Where's my speech?
33:50Oh, it says, Tiana Taylor, we have no script for you.
33:53Oh, no.
33:54Everyone exit stage right.
33:56Oh, no.
34:00She should have just said,
34:01God bless all the listeners.
34:02Yes.
34:03Exactly.
34:04I do want to give an honourable mention to the show's host, Kiki Palmer,
34:08who did a great job padding time when all of this was unfolding.
34:11Anyway, that's my little story.
34:12How much more y'all need me to tell?
34:17How is it going for y'all with dating?
34:20Let's get real.
34:23I was trying to do the Seinfeld theme song.
34:25Don't, don't, don't.
34:26That doesn't matter.
34:28No, that's fair.
34:29One of the trickier theme songs.
34:31In my head, it's like perfect, but I can't say it.
34:35Mel Dracina does her own stunts.
34:38Just before we go, what other animal facts do you know?
34:40Because the rhinos that only pee backwards,
34:43that's an interesting fact.
34:44That is an interesting fact.
34:45And I want to know more and where did you find that out?
34:47What other animal facts do you know?
34:49Off the top of your head.
34:50Off the top, about weeing?
34:52No, about anything.
34:55About anything in the animal kingdom.
34:57Hippos don't actually swim.
34:59They run along the bed of the river, the bank of the river.
35:04Did you know that?
35:05Did everyone know that?
35:07They don't swim, they run.
35:09Yeah, because they don't have a life raft like you.
35:13They're not wearing floaties.
35:16Anything else, Mel?
35:18Or is that your week in arts and entertainment?
35:21Mel, we have no script for you.
35:23Exit safe.
35:23Ladies and gentlemen, on that note,
35:25would you please thank Mel Tracina?
35:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
35:40Hey, so much happening in sport across the country.
35:43Oh boy, it almost went up the answer.
35:45Yes, New South Wales winning game one
35:47of the Women's State of Origin.
35:49I'm going to say well done to Millie Elliott,
35:51who's back in the side after giving birth.
35:53You've been telling everyone that childbirth
35:55is so much harder than footy.
35:56Do you still feel like that after that game?
35:58You actually forget about childbirth.
35:59That was really hard, so...
36:02Sorry, can we just see the full shot?
36:04You actually forget about childbirth.
36:05That was really hard, so...
36:07Interesting.
36:09Meanwhile, in the men's NRL,
36:10there's a lot happening.
36:11Tough week for the Melbourne Storm.
36:13Jerome Luai is the first player
36:14to join the PNG Chiefs.
36:15While the commentators are grappling
36:17with secret messages.
36:18Have a look at the bottom right-hand corner
36:20of the scoreboard.
36:21By the way, all game, Brandi,
36:22have been trying to work out 23-04-2026.
36:25There's always a hidden message there with a...
36:27No, that's the date.
36:29Wow.
36:30The Da Vinci Code, it's incredible.
36:32Wow, he's inside the minds of these commentators.
36:34Can we see that number again?
36:35No, he's right.
36:36That is the number.
36:372-3-0-4-2-0-2-6
36:39when you times 99 by 9
36:41and add 4-2-9-7
36:42divide by 2...
36:44Oh, my God, we got our answer!
36:45We got it!
36:45We got it!
36:50It's a win for arithmetic.
36:52Yes.
36:53Let's head to the AFL now.
36:55Whiteboard?
36:55Whiteboard gate.
36:56Whiteboard fiasco.
36:58Whiteboard picture.
36:59Confidential notes on a whiteboard.
37:00We're leaked online showing the strengths
37:02and the weaknesses of Essendon players.
37:04OK, this was huge.
37:06And what was on the whiteboard?
37:08Under weaknesses, the Lions identified
37:11Ben Mackay was low on confidence,
37:13while Zach Merritt and Kyle Langford
37:15were labelled selfish.
37:17Wow, and if we look at that number,
37:18is that a secret code?
37:19No, that's their jumper number.
37:21That's their jumper number.
37:22That said, opposition whiteboards aren't new.
37:25That's right, and they're not just in the AFL.
37:27We also run a whiteboard on our opposition
37:30with their strengths and weaknesses.
37:32Got to be prepared.
37:33Let's run you through the board.
37:35So, my Renault rules.
37:38Strengths.
37:38The Bondi Vets jaw.
37:39It's a good jaw.
37:40It is a good jaw.
37:41That is a strong jaw.
37:42Under weaknesses, asbestos.
37:43We're not sure.
37:45We're not sure.
37:46We can't be sure.
37:46What else have we got?
37:47The floor.
37:48The strengths are the floor.
37:52The weaknesses are the rest of the building.
37:54Of course.
37:56And then under Big Brother...
37:57Yet to find any strengths.
37:59Can we see that?
38:00No strengths at the moment.
38:02We've got a slight weakness, though.
38:03The host and the lack of a roof.
38:07So, this is our whiteboard.
38:08We'll update that throughout the year.
38:10Back to you, Mel.
38:10Thanks so much, Tim.
38:12Let's go back to sport.
38:13Sorry, just one more.
38:14So, prop comedy is the lowest form of comedy.
38:19Have a year.
38:20All right.
38:20Let's go back to sport.
38:22And let's head to the States.
38:24Three times a Grand Prix winner,
38:26Kimi Antonelli wins the Miami Grand Prix.
38:29Yes, well done to Kimi Antonelli winning the Miami Grand Prix.
38:31Ozzy Oscar Piastri was P3 on the podium.
38:34But what can we say...
38:37A mild applause from that.
38:39That's amazing.
38:40But what can we say about the winner,
38:41young Italian Kimi Antonelli?
38:43Look at those calves.
38:44It's better than mine, aren't they?
38:45Eh, Simon?
38:46Good calves, Antonelli.
38:48Bravo.
38:50Right, sorry.
38:50I got distracted.
38:51Fair enough.
38:53Fair enough.
38:53That is my friend Ted Kravitz absolutely losing it.
38:56You have been following the GP, though, Tim.
38:59There's been some rule changes.
39:01Yeah, after the break due to the Middle East,
39:03there have been some changes to the technical regulations.
39:06Pretty complex stuff.
39:07But we'll let veteran expert commentator Martin Brundle
39:09break it all down.
39:10It's like your favourite slice of toast, all hot and ready to be eaten.
39:16You put some butter on it out of the fridge.
39:18The butter won't melt and it's frustrating.
39:21You slice the butter up a little bit more, spread it around.
39:24Now you've got some delicious toast and hot butter.
39:29If anyone needs a cognitive test, I reckon it might be Martin Brundle.
39:33He's smelling burning toast after that.
39:36Oh, that's what caught my eye.
39:38It's fair to say the camera crew got a little distracted after the race.
39:41Whichever way it stacks up, though, the job that's been done over the winter
39:45was not what we were expecting.
39:49No.
39:50Wow.
39:52Look at those calves.
39:53I know.
39:54Those are some beautiful calves.
39:55And still the best overtake of the weekend, so well done.
39:58Well done.
40:00Well, moving on.
40:01And staying in America.
40:03Here's Golden Tempo!
40:06Golden Tempo!
40:07And Cherie DeVoe make history in the Kentucky Derby!
40:12Golden Tempo, amazing, went from last to first, winning the Kentucky Derby.
40:16The first female trainer to win the Derby.
40:18And 24 million Americans tuned in to watch the action, the fashion,
40:23and the fans at the track.
40:24The mayor of the infield, how are you?
40:28Well, who's he?
40:31Sorry, that's one of Glenn's new characters.
40:34Sorry.
40:34No apologies.
40:36Hey, just finally.
40:37Well, if basketball and netball aren't your thing, there is an alternative.
40:41An ancient ball game played over 3,000 years ago
40:46is making a comeback in Mexico City.
40:48Hard to get a group chat together to start that, doesn't it?
40:52Yeah.
40:52I'm just so glad that 10 finally have the rights to an exclusive sport.
40:56This is great.
40:56Forget the AFL, the NRL.
40:58This ancient game.
41:00How do we play?
41:01Players use their hips to hit a heavy rubber ball across a court
41:05with the members of one team traditionally decapitated
41:09after the game to appease the gods.
41:14I'll stick with netball.
41:17You should do that on the weekend in your social netball.
41:19You decapitate the losing team.
41:22Hair if you need, with a machine.
41:24Ah, look.
41:25Thankfully, the rules have changed.
41:26Fortunately, that rule has been disregarded.
41:30Oh, it's political correctness gone now!
41:33The woke agenda's got out of control.
41:35You can't behead someone without someone asking questions.
41:38Exactly.
41:39What happened to this country?
41:41Mind you, not the weirdest contest we saw this week.
41:44That is on the other side of this
41:45as we wrap things up from the Chiefs.
42:00Thank you so much for watching us this week.
42:02And before we go, let's head to Adelaide.
42:05Lord Darth Vader marched into Rundle Mall today to conquer once more.
42:09I'm Lord Vader.
42:10I'm taking the mall's balls.
42:13They're my new death star.
42:14How did we not get to this earlier?
42:16How did we not get to this earlier?
42:18Someone came to Earth and visited Adelaide?
42:21Come on!
42:22That's incredible.
42:24Speaking of mall's balls,
42:24I think we saw Glenn Robbins' mall's balls a few times tonight.
42:27This was yesterday.
42:28Star Wars Day.
42:29May the fourth be with you.
42:31In a council far, far away,
42:33stormtroopers Jim and Jason
42:34transform their garbage truck into a makeshift space cruiser.
42:38Time to take out the galactic waste.
42:42Except it's Galactic Recycling Week this week.
42:46Do you think Ewoks are rubbish or are they in the fogo bin?
42:50What's a fogo bin?
42:51What's a fogo bin?
42:52Oh, I forget you have staff who put out your rubbish.
42:57It's food and organic food.
42:59Food, organic, greens, and organic.
43:09It's like where your compost goes.
43:11It's fear of guessing out.
43:13It's where we'll be putting these scripts in the not-too-distant future.
43:17What else is happening in the world?
43:20Yes.
43:21170 contestants taking part in a power napping competition.
43:26Wow.
43:27You want to pick up your script now?
43:29Probably.
43:30Oh, I just saw them all's balls.
43:38Hey, people are waiting for the late news.
43:41People need the news.
43:42No, they need this news.
43:44No, they need the news.
43:44I mean, they don't need it urgently to watch it at 5 o'clock,
43:47but they need the news, and this is the news.
43:49This is a napping competition in South Korea.
43:51Let's meet the competitors.
43:53I usually don't sleep well.
43:55I struggle to fall asleep and wake up easily.
43:58It's hard to know what the issue is with a sleeping arrangement.
44:04No, this is a power napping competition.
44:07Exactly.
44:07And speaking of which, it is about 9.40.
44:10Which means it's getting quite late.
44:11Can we check in on our audience?
44:13How are they going?
44:14Oh, they've entered the power napping competition as well.
44:17Sorry, that's the Studio 10 audience.
44:18My apologies.
44:20It's so uncomfortable.
44:21They either found that not funny at all,
44:23or they are doing a great job.
44:26Actually, can we just check in?
44:26Speaking of napping, can we check in with the green room?
44:28Oh, that's lovely.
44:30That's beautiful.
44:32On that note, a big thank you to Glenn Robbins for joining us.
44:35Thank you to Mel Chisney.
44:37We'll see you next year, right here in the Philippines.
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