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Late Night with Seth Meyers - Season 13 - Episode 25: Tracy Morgan, Cazzie David
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00:05From 30 Rockefeller Plaza in New York, it's Late Night with Seth Meyers, tonight, Gracie
00:13Morgan, writer Cassie Davis, an all-new Closer Look, and now, Seth Meyers.
00:28Good evening, everybody.
00:29I'm Seth Meyers.
00:30This is Late Night.
00:31We hope you're doing well.
00:32And now, if you don't mind, let's get to the news.
00:34The U.S. launched joint military strikes with Israel against Iran over the weekend in
00:39Operation Epic Fury.
00:41Epic Fury?
00:42Who's our Secretary of Defense?
00:44Cartman?
00:47Operation Epic Fury.
00:49Is it a missile strike or a new Mountain Dew?
00:53Folks, this was even more successful than Operation Baja Blast.
00:59The White House released a photo over the weekend of President Trump overseeing military
01:03strikes on Iran from a secure room at Mar-a-Lago.
01:06But was it a secure room, though?
01:10I had a more secure room when I was trying on jeans at Old Navy.
01:16That's right.
01:17The White House released a photo of President Trump overseeing military strikes on Iran from
01:21Mar-a-Lago.
01:21Yeah, I probably could have guessed you were in Florida.
01:24Look at this guy.
01:24You look like you were drunk in a jacuzzi.
01:30And they pulled you out to take this picture.
01:34That's right.
01:35Trump is overseeing military strikes on Iran from Mar-a-Lago.
01:37Wait a minute.
01:38You started a war in the Middle East, and you didn't even go into the office?
01:41You're going to work from home it?
01:44How am I going to get my writers to come into work when the President of the United States
01:50treats war like a Teams meeting?
01:54President Trump spoke on the phone last night with the New York Times for roughly six minutes,
01:58but no matter what he said, they refused to tell him the wordle.
02:06President Trump reportedly told FBI Director Cash Patel that he was disappointed with Patel's
02:10behavior at the Milan-Cortina Winter Olympics, though if I know Trump, he was mostly upset
02:14that Cash was in the men's locker room.
02:19Have I taught you nothing?
02:24Paramount Skydance said today that it plans to merge its Paramount Plus streaming service
02:28with HBO Max just when your parents finally figured out how to watch Yellowstone.
02:35Burger King has announced it will install a new AI chatbot into employee headsets
02:40to monitor customer interactions and make sure they use specific phrases like
02:44please, thank you, and welcome back, Mr. President.
02:49A metal detectorist in Wales recently found two lead ingots that are believed to date back
02:54to the Roman era, while the detectorist doesn't date at all.
03:07Can we just, in post, can we put in the sound of, like, somebody hitting
03:10beep, beep, beep, beep?
03:14And finally, in honor of the expansion of its D subway line, the Los Angeles Metro last week
03:21offered new T-shirts that read,
03:23Ride the D.
03:26They're hoping it sells better than the MTA shirt that reads,
03:29I got F'd.
03:31And that was a monologue, everybody.
03:35We've got a great show for you tonight.
03:38You know him from 30 Rock, the last OG, and his work on Saturday Night Live.
03:42He's currently starring in The Fall and Rise of Reggie Dinkins,
03:45which airs Monday nights here on NBC and streams the next day on Peacock.
03:49The great Tracy Morgan is back on the show, everybody.
03:54No other guests in the world like him.
03:56So happy he's back.
03:57And she is a multi-talented, best-selling author whose first essay collection,
04:00No One Asked for This, was a New York Times bestseller.
04:03Her latest, Delusions of Grandeur, of Romance, of Progress, is available now.
04:08Kazzie David is back on the show.
04:10We love seeing Kazzie.
04:12She's the best.
04:13Before we get to all that, the Trump administration launched a war with Iran
04:17without any clear strategy for how it would end or how long it would last
04:21or who would take over.
04:22For more on this, it's time for a Closer Look.
04:28After launching yet another illegal war in the Middle East
04:31that could destabilize the region and put American troops in harm's way,
04:34Trump has been spending his time doing what all presidents do during wars,
04:38taking calls from reporters.
04:40I just got off the phone with the president.
04:42He is very pleased with how things are going.
04:45So I just got off the phone with President Trump.
04:48It was a nine-minute phone interview.
04:51Kristen, let's bring you in here.
04:52You talked to President Trump over the weekend by phone.
04:56Robert Costa spoke with President Trump by phone this evening.
04:59Rachel spoke with President Trump late today.
05:01Rachel, he told you that he was with the generals when you were on the phone with him.
05:05He was with the generals, so they were there, just sitting around mid-war
05:12while he chit-chatted.
05:14Yeah, I'm at Mar-a-Lago right now.
05:16We're looking at some highly classified material.
05:18I'll put you on speaker so you can say hello.
05:20Say hello, generals.
05:22I mean, this is like when I call my mom and she picks up,
05:24even though she's in the middle of her book club.
05:27And she's like, I'm here with the ladies.
05:29I'll pass you around.
05:29No, mom, I don't have time.
05:30Oh, hi, Gloria.
05:31Hi, yes.
05:33Yeah, things are good.
05:34What?
05:34How's SNL?
05:35Um, I left 12 years ago.
05:36Yeah.
05:38I have a late-night talk show now.
05:39You don't have to apologize.
05:41It's not a downgrade.
05:43You know what?
05:44Pass me to Janet.
05:45I need her bun cake recipe.
05:47Also, why is he suddenly chatting with reporters on the phone?
05:50Aren't these the same people he always says are destroying America
05:53and are the enemy of the people?
05:55This is like if you had a brutal six-hour breakup talk
05:57with your girlfriend on Friday night
05:58and then called her on Monday saying,
06:00Hey, I just saw there's a new poke place.
06:03Should we check it out?
06:03Why are you scream crying?
06:06You love poke.
06:08But now that the Ayatollah is dead,
06:10the question is, what happens next?
06:12Who takes over in Iran?
06:14President Trump told the New York Times
06:15he has, quote,
06:16three very good choices for who could lead Iran.
06:19Okay, well, he's got some ideas at least.
06:22That's good.
06:22So, uh, what happened to those three candidates?
06:25He said the attack was so successful,
06:27it knocked out most of the candidates.
06:29It's not going to be anybody that we were thinking of
06:32because they are all dead.
06:33Second or third place is dead.
06:36Second and third place is dead?
06:37That sounds like they're announcing the results
06:40of the Coney Island hot dog eating contest
06:43after a salmonella outbreak.
06:45First place is dead.
06:47Second place is dead.
06:49Third place is in critical condition,
06:50and now we are hearing dead.
06:53Also, I love that he's describing it
06:55as so successful in one breath,
06:57while in the next he admits
06:58they blew up plans A, B, and C.
07:02This does strike me as a job
07:04you don't want to just get thrust into.
07:05It's a country of 90 million people,
07:07not a Hollywood movie.
07:07We're hoping for a Dave situation
07:09where a Kevin Kline type steps in to fill the void.
07:13Was Dave too dated a reference?
07:16You got to pin that one on Seth.
07:18It wasn't in the original draft.
07:22Seth said they'll all remember Dave,
07:24and now he's the one.
07:25Oh, I wouldn't want to be Seth Meyers right now.
07:27He's going to get an earful
07:29from his very smug writers
07:31who warned him this very thing would happen.
07:33But do check out Dave.
07:34I'm sure he's streaming somewhere.
07:36It's a great film.
07:381993's Dave, starring Kevin Kline and Ben Kingsley,
07:41the great Ben Kingsley.
07:43We love him, Dave.
07:45We love Ben Kingsley.
07:51Just make sure there's some Dave fans next week.
07:56Who's running audience control?
07:58There's no Dave fans here.
08:01All right, so Trump's plan for who would take over
08:03seems to have gotten scrambled,
08:05but what about his timeline for the war?
08:07Surely he's put some thought into that, right?
08:09He told Axios this war could end in two to three days
08:12with a deal.
08:13Then he told the New York Times
08:15four to five weeks of fighting.
08:17So it could either be three days or four to five weeks?
08:19Okay, spectrum cable.
08:23Yeah, hi, you said the technician would be here
08:25last Friday and now it's Monday
08:26and I'd just love to know
08:27when you think someone's going to be here.
08:28Wait, what?
08:29No, don't put me on speaker
08:30so I can say hi to the guys.
08:33Hi, guys.
08:33Hi, so you're all, nobody's doing service calls?
08:36You're all just sitting around at headquarters?
08:37Cool, cool.
08:38So maybe three days, maybe five weeks.
08:41There are a lot of pesky life and death details
08:43to work out here,
08:44but Trump wants to assure you
08:46he has the attention span to figure this out.
08:49Somebody said today, they said,
08:51oh, well, if the president wants to do it really quickly
08:53after that, he'll get bored.
08:54I don't get bored.
08:56There's nothing boring about this.
08:58Do you agree with that, Pete?
08:59I don't think there's anything, Mr. General,
09:02there's nothing boring about it.
09:04Somebody actually said from the media,
09:07I think he'll get bored after about a week or two.
09:09No, we don't get bored.
09:10I never get bored.
09:11If I got bored, I wouldn't be standing here right now.
09:14I guarantee you that.
09:16And for once, I agree,
09:18you're not going to get bored with Iran.
09:20I mean, what would that even look like?
09:22I mean, I guess if you were bored,
09:23you'd just start talking about drapes and ballrooms
09:26and instead of the war you just started,
09:28but even I don't think you'd do that.
09:29What? Really?
09:31Oh, me.
09:32We're adding on to the building a little bit.
09:34We're improving the building.
09:36See that nice drape?
09:38When that comes down right now,
09:40you see a very, very deep hole,
09:42but in about a year and a half from now,
09:44you're going to see a very, very beautiful building.
09:47And there's your entrance to it right there.
09:49In fact, it looks so nice,
09:50I don't think I'll even,
09:50I think I'll save money on the doors
09:52because it can't get more beautiful than that.
09:55I picked those drapes in my first term.
09:58I always like gold,
10:00but I think we can save a lot of money.
10:02I just saved,
10:03I just saved curtains.
10:06But, and it will be,
10:07it'll be spectacular.
10:08It'll be the most beautiful ballroom.
10:10I believe it's because I built many a ballroom.
10:12I believe it's going to be the most beautiful ballroom
10:15anywhere in the world.
10:16And when you hear all that hammering out there,
10:18you know why the first lady is not thrilled exactly.
10:21She said,
10:22will the pile drivers ever stop?
10:24You know,
10:24they go from six in the morning till 1130 in the evening.
10:28Can you imagine?
10:28Literally bombs are falling all over the Middle East
10:32and he's complaining about construction sounds.
10:36But for anyone who's already worrying
10:38about the cost of another war,
10:40did you factor in the money he's saving on curtains?
10:45The door money?
10:49Also, I have to go back to the previous clip
10:51where Trump was insisting he wouldn't get bored
10:54to talk about this.
10:55There's nothing boring about this.
10:57Do you agree with that, Pete?
10:58I don't think there's anything, Mr. General.
11:00Mr. General?
11:02Is that his name?
11:04Are you talking to an actual general
11:05or the mascot from the insurance companies?
11:09I can't save you enough on car insurance
11:11to pay for this war.
11:12Don't ask me again.
11:14I know you saved curtain money.
11:16We still can't do it.
11:18In fact, Trump's plan for what happens next in Iran
11:20seems to be less about precision and planning
11:22and more about crossing our fingers.
11:25In the social media post Sunday,
11:26President Trump wrote this.
11:30Quote,
11:32Yeah.
11:40I mean, I don't know what's more troubling,
11:42the use of hopefully or the use of peacefully merge.
11:45Like, Iran is suddenly going to become a traffic circle
11:48in Daniel Tiger's neighborhood.
11:51And it's not just Trump who seems indecisive
11:53about how all this is going to end.
11:55Even the war's biggest cheerleaders, like Lindsey Graham,
11:57insist it is not their job to plan out an endgame.
12:01The new Iran, whatever it is, whether it's a cleric
12:05or a representative democracy, our goal is to make sure
12:09it cannot become, again, the largest state sponsor of terrorism.
12:13That's a win for us.
12:15But is there a plan to make sure that happens, Senator?
12:19Is there a plan?
12:20Does the president have a plan to guarantee that that happens?
12:23No, it's not his job or my job to do this.
12:28How many times do I have to tell you?
12:29You know this idea, you break it, you own it?
12:31I don't buy that one bit.
12:33I don't buy that one bit, you break it, you own it.
12:35And I said as much in the pottery barn
12:37when my meemaw knocked over a shelf of ceramic vases.
12:41It's not her fault she can't see.
12:43Though it wouldn't kill her to put her glasses on.
12:46I know you don't like the way you look at a meemaw,
12:49but ain't no man attracted to an old bag
12:51who keeps knocking over vases with her ass.
12:57But the thing that strikes me...
13:00The thing that strikes me as especially weird about this
13:03is how little effort Trump is putting into even trying
13:07to convince anyone, any of us,
13:09that this war no one asks for is a good idea.
13:11The polling so far is terrible,
13:12and when Trump announced the war,
13:14he did it from his private club in the middle of the night.
13:16President Trump is in Mar-a-Lago.
13:19He addressed the nation in a video message
13:21in the middle of the night last night.
13:23A short time ago,
13:25the United States military began
13:28major combat operations in Iran.
13:32I'm sorry, but if you're going to announce an illegal war
13:34that violates the Constitution from your private club at 3 a.m.,
13:36can you at least take the hat off first?
13:38You look like an Italian tourist in Times Square.
13:41I was worried you were going to turn it over
13:43for questions to knock off Spider-Man.
13:47Now, of course, as we've pointed out countless times
13:49on this show, Trump and his supporters claimed
13:51they claimed he was against regime-change wars
13:54and nation-building abroad.
13:56He called himself the candidate of peace,
13:57which was ludicrous then,
13:59and is even more ridiculous now.
14:01But now his MAGA base has to get on board
14:02with the neocon version of Trump
14:04they pretended didn't exist.
14:05How are they going to reconcile their desire
14:08to end foreign wars
14:10with Trump's desire to start foreign wars?
14:12Fox News, you got any ideas?
14:14And Dan, your message to some of our friends on the right
14:18who are saying,
14:20look, President Trump ran on no regime change,
14:23and now President Trump is doing regime change.
14:25You see the Democrats are picking up on that
14:27for 2026 themes.
14:29Your message to them tonight?
14:32Well, it's incredible how the Doomer's...
14:34Lawrence, it hasn't even been 24 hours.
14:36It's happened at 3 a.m.
14:37It's not 3 a.m. Eastern time.
14:39Can you give the man a chance to cook a little bit?
14:43I don't know, man.
14:44There's no amount of cooking
14:45that's going to undo the regime change.
14:48I mean, unless you're cooking up a way
14:49to reanimate the corpses of those candidates you killed.
14:52I mean, who in your administration
14:53would even do a thing like that?
15:03Also, you can't say let him cook on Fox News.
15:07No one understands what you're saying.
15:09They're all 100 years old.
15:12They think you mean Trump's literally preparing food.
15:16Oh, I hope it's soup.
15:19You sound like a 40-year-old drug dealer
15:21trying to blend in at high school.
15:23Hey, chap, mind if I mog you?
15:25No cap. I'm look-smaxing.
15:27Let me cook?
15:29Trump lied.
15:30He said he would put an end to regime-change wars,
15:32and now he's starting yet another regime-change war.
15:34But this time, he can't even decide what the goal is,
15:37how long it'll take, who will take over,
15:39how it will end.
15:40Americans don't want this.
15:41The polling is terrible.
15:42Much like the site of his new ballroom, Trump is in...
15:45A very, very deep hole.
15:47This has been A Closer Look.
15:53We'll be right back with Tracy Morgan, everybody!
16:01For more of Seth's Closer Looks,
16:02be sure to subscribe to Late Night on YouTube.
16:12Our first guest tonight is an Emmy Award-nominated actor
16:16and very funny comedian.
16:17You know from 30 Rock,
16:18the last OG in his work on Saturday Night Live.
16:21He stars in the new comedy series
16:22The Fall and Rise of Reggie Dinkins,
16:25which airs Monday nights at 8.30 on NBC and streams.
16:27The next day on Peacock,
16:29please welcome back to the show
16:30the one, the only, our very good friend,
16:31Tracy Morgan, everybody.
17:02We'll be right back to the show.
17:02What's up? What's up, Seth?
17:04How are we?
17:04I'm good, baby.
17:05You know, me and you go back
17:06like spinal cords and car seats.
17:08That's right.
17:09We go back a long time.
17:102001, we've known each other a long time.
17:12Long time.
17:12And I want to talk about your new show,
17:14but before that,
17:14I do want to check in real quick.
17:16How are you feeling about your Knicks this year?
17:17You've been going to a lot of games.
17:18I love you.
17:19You ain't seen what we did yesterday?
17:20Yeah, really nice.
17:21We spanked San Antonio.
17:23Yeah.
17:24I love the Knicks.
17:25I love New York.
17:25I love y'all.
17:26I love everything about us.
17:29You got the best pizza.
17:31You got the best pizza.
17:32We got subway stations.
17:33You know that, right?
17:34Yeah.
17:35We got the best people in the world.
17:40This right here is New York City.
17:43This is where King Kong died.
17:46And we told Godzilla,
17:47you next.
17:48You the flying turtle.
17:50The three-headed marshes,
17:51y'all can get it.
17:53You're not playing here.
17:54No.
17:55Not enough people talk.
17:57You know why everybody can't come here?
17:59Because the lights are too bright.
18:01Right.
18:02Lights are too bright on Broadway.
18:04Yeah.
18:05The city never sleep.
18:07We went through that blizzard.
18:09The snow is gone.
18:11The snow said,
18:12I ain't landing down there.
18:17I was, um,
18:19you know,
18:19I had a great New York moment.
18:20I brought my son.
18:21The first sporting event
18:22I ever took him to
18:22was a Knicks game.
18:23And before the game started,
18:24we ran into you
18:25and it was thrilling.
18:26That was who I wanted him.
18:28That's who I wanted him to see first.
18:30But you don't know.
18:31You see how close he is to my ear?
18:32Yeah.
18:33He whispered in my ear,
18:34let me hold $20.
18:35What?
18:37He asked,
18:37he wanted to hold $20?
18:39I'm his bookie.
18:41I'm his bookie.
18:42You took,
18:43you were taking action from him?
18:45Yes.
18:46He laid some bets down.
18:49He lost three stacks
18:50against the Jets.
18:51Oh, no.
18:52Well, now,
18:52that's a good transition.
18:53And I want to talk about
18:54your show, Reggie Dinkins.
18:55And I will say,
18:56I saw you on our friend
18:57Jimmy Fallon's show last week.
18:58And things got very off track.
19:01And I want to make sure
19:02that we talk about your show.
19:03A lot of people I love,
19:04you love,
19:05helped create this show.
19:06Sam Means,
19:06Robert Carlock,
19:07Tina Fey.
19:07Tina, my sister.
19:08It's a wonderful show.
19:09All my brothers.
19:10You play a former Jets player
19:13who got kicked out of the league
19:14for gambling.
19:15Yeah.
19:16And now you're making
19:17a documentary about your life.
19:19Big shots to Pete Rose.
19:21I love Pete Rose.
19:22Yeah.
19:23They mad at him.
19:25He went to his grave
19:25and now going to the Hall of Fame
19:27for gambling.
19:27Yeah.
19:28They mad at him
19:28because he used a dugout phone
19:30to call his bookie.
19:31Yeah.
19:32So this show is based on that,
19:34you know?
19:35But we are here.
19:36Do you feel like Pete Rose
19:38should have had a redemption arc?
19:39What?
19:40Charlie Hustle?
19:40Yeah.
19:42I had a fight over him
19:43because I was playing baseball card
19:45and this dude took
19:46two Willie Randolphs,
19:47a Pete Rose,
19:48a Reggie Jackson,
19:50a Rob Gidgett,
19:50and a Greg Neckler.
19:51And I said,
19:52you're not leaving this park
19:53with my cards.
19:54And I tried to make a deal
19:56with him,
19:56but he wouldn't go for the deal
19:57so I beat him up
19:58and took my cards back.
20:00I still collect baseball cards
20:02to this day.
20:03Do you really?
20:04I got a Jordan rookie.
20:05Really?
20:06You want to buy it?
20:11Please don't use this time
20:12to sell your baseball card.
20:15Did you?
20:15You played football
20:16in high school, right?
20:17Yes, I was a tailback.
20:18I was a halfback.
20:19I was pretty good.
20:20Yeah.
20:20I ran a 4.640 as a junior.
20:23That's really good.
20:23So you did track and football.
20:25That was, yeah.
20:25I didn't do nothing else.
20:26I didn't do no science.
20:27I didn't do nothing else.
20:28Okay.
20:28Just sports.
20:30Just sports.
20:31And that's it.
20:31Sports and cheerleaders.
20:32That's it.
20:33Okay.
20:34That's when I discovered girls.
20:36Okay, gotcha.
20:37And that's when I put math
20:38and math manual all that away.
20:40The football came in handy
20:41your first appearance on SNL.
20:43You played William Refrigerator Perry.
20:44Oh, wow.
20:45I remember my very first appearance.
20:47My life has come 360
20:49because I'm playing another football player.
20:51Yeah.
20:52You're a Giants fan in real life.
20:56Yeah.
20:56You play a former Jet.
20:57What do you feel about people
20:59who root for the Jets?
21:00Do you have sympathy
21:02for people who choose?
21:03If you are a Jet fan,
21:05a Mets fan,
21:06or a Nets fan,
21:07you got low self-esteem.
21:08Okay.
21:10You feel like they've just
21:11made bad choices.
21:12I heard that your crew
21:13is Jet fans.
21:14Yeah, we are all Jets and Mets here.
21:15No, you better move on from them
21:17because...
21:17You think I should cut ties?
21:19With these guys,
21:20your ratings just start going down.
21:21You better come back up
21:21and get some giant fans
21:23to do your cameras.
21:24Now, I just will say,
21:26you know,
21:26the Giants haven't really been
21:28guns blazing in recent years.
21:29That's because we're rebuilding.
21:31I see.
21:33I'm going to start
21:34recruiting for them.
21:35I got some high schoolers for them.
21:38You said you were
21:39a former tailback.
21:40How many plays
21:41do you think you would survive
21:42if you played NFL football
21:43right now?
21:48How many plays
21:49would I survive?
21:51It took you so long
21:52to change the way
21:53you were sitting.
21:54Two?
21:55Two?
21:55Yeah.
21:56But you got to understand,
21:57I used to play for Cleveland.
22:00Cleveland?
22:00Yeah.
22:01They put me in the game now.
22:03I'm just calling the timeout.
22:04That's it.
22:06Which Cleveland
22:06did you play for?
22:08I played for the Cleveland
22:10dugout.
22:15The Cleveland dugout?
22:16Were they a local team,
22:17the Cleveland dugout?
22:18I'm watching you.
22:18I don't like that guy right there.
22:19You don't like that guy right there?
22:20Yeah, he looks suspicious.
22:21Yeah, yeah.
22:21We'll get him out during the...
22:24You know what?
22:24I didn't think so either,
22:25but now he's very suspicious.
22:26Hey, he's putting his head in.
22:30You know what?
22:31I want to ask you a lot more
22:32questions about Reggie Dickens.
22:33Will you stick around?
22:34Mm-hmm.
22:35All right.
22:36We'll be right back
22:36with Margaret from Tracy Morgan.
22:46No, I don't want to talk
22:47about the cat.
22:48I want to go find it.
22:49Wait, sorry.
22:50You're not seriously planning
22:51on going back out there,
22:52are you?
22:53After last night?
22:53Last night was a good start.
22:55Every great cat finder
22:57starts with a few dogs.
22:59That's where the expression
23:00comes from.
23:01But it's a fool's errand.
23:03I don't even know
23:03what that means.
23:04Fools run errands all the time.
23:06That's why Wawa sells sushi.
23:09Welcome back.
23:10We're here with Tracy Morgan.
23:11That was a clip from
23:12The Fall and Rise of Reggie Dinkins.
23:14I mean, one of my favorite people
23:17in this business or any other,
23:19Daniel Radcliffe.
23:20How do you enjoy
23:20working with Daniel?
23:21He is so sweet.
23:22Yeah.
23:22My whole cast,
23:24I mean, he's different with me.
23:26We're like,
23:27that's my brother.
23:28And like, we're working
23:29and he's always grabbing.
23:30You know, I got hit by a truck
23:32and all that.
23:32So he's always grabbing
23:33and helping me
23:34and moving me.
23:35And he's really on me
23:37all the time.
23:38And I love him for that, man.
23:39I love him.
23:40I know you're,
23:41I don't know if you're...
23:42I'm going to see him
23:42this Friday on Broadway.
23:44Are you really?
23:44That's fantastic.
23:46Go Broadway.
23:48You know,
23:48I know you're more
23:49of a Star Wars guy
23:50than a Harry Potter guy.
23:51Ah, Star Wars.
23:53I went to the Nick game
23:54with a female
23:55that's in the Star Wars movie now.
23:57Really?
23:57And I told her,
23:59I told her
24:00that Chewbacca is garbage.
24:03Is this a...
24:03Because everybody knows
24:04he's behind
24:05in his child support payments.
24:08Chewbacca is behind...
24:09Chewbacca has about four litters
24:11and don't take care
24:11of none of them puppies.
24:12Oh, my God.
24:13I had no idea this is...
24:14I mean, but you are
24:15kind of an insider.
24:16What's the guy that Billy D. Williams?
24:18What was he?
24:18Billy D. Williams?
24:19Lando Calrissian?
24:20Lando Calrissian left
24:21a good union job.
24:24He went against
24:25the Rebel Alliance
24:26and went and got
24:27with the evil empire.
24:29Yeah.
24:30Bad.
24:30Bad, bad.
24:33Hey, is it true
24:34you once got lost
24:36at a zoo
24:36when you were young?
24:37When I was younger, yeah.
24:38I was in camp.
24:40My counselor, Spencer,
24:42when we first got to the zoo,
24:43he said,
24:44nobody throw nothing
24:45at the animals.
24:46Sure, that's a good...
24:47What did little Tracy do?
24:48Oh, no.
24:49Start throwing rocks
24:50at the monkeys.
24:52So he yelled at me
24:53and I ran off.
24:54I took off
24:54and I was lost
24:55in the Bronx Zoo
24:55for like four hours.
24:58And they found me.
24:59I was hanging out
25:00with some flamingos.
25:02I might have got
25:03one of them pregnant.
25:04I don't know.
25:05She laid an egg
25:06and I cut out.
25:07I was a deadbeat dad
25:08to a flamingo chick.
25:11Very, very judgmental
25:13about Chewbacca
25:13based on your own behavior.
25:17I'm young Skywalker.
25:19How's your aquarium?
25:21Multiple aquariums.
25:22Well, I have
25:23the 20,000-gallon
25:24shark tank
25:24in the backyard.
25:25Yep.
25:26Then I got a pool table
25:27with a school
25:27of piranha in there.
25:29Really?
25:29Yeah.
25:30So you play pool
25:30and there's...
25:31And there's piranha
25:32swimming around under you.
25:33Is that distracting
25:34when you're trying
25:35to play pool?
25:35Not for me, it ain't.
25:38Put some money down.
25:39I'm going to win.
25:41You're going to be
25:42worried about your legs.
25:42I'm going to be
25:43shooting,
25:44moving balls and stuff.
25:46This is, as your love of...
25:47You know what I feed them?
25:49Feed your fish?
25:50Yeah.
25:50What?
25:51The dude that's
25:51trying to feed them.
25:54Throw your ass in there.
25:58I got to spend no money
25:59on no food.
26:01They eat for weeks.
26:03So you have to keep
26:04replacing the guy
26:05who feeds them
26:05then, obviously.
26:06Absolutely.
26:12You're the voice
26:13of a fish
26:13in a new movie
26:14called Swapped.
26:15Yeah, me and
26:15Michael B. Jordan.
26:17That's a good cast.
26:18My daughter's in there
26:18with me.
26:19Oh, that's fantastic.
26:19Yeah, she has a line
26:20with Michael B. Jordan.
26:22Really?
26:22Yeah, yeah.
26:23That's good.
26:24How are your kids?
26:25Are your kids good?
26:25Yeah, they're all healthy
26:27and they're doing well.
26:28My son just graduated college.
26:30My youngest son...
26:31Yeah, Connecticut.
26:33My daughter's doing great.
26:34She does nothing but hundreds
26:36on her tests
26:37and she's beautiful.
26:38That's great.
26:39Yeah.
26:40And I'm a cool dad.
26:41You're a cool dad.
26:42You might be the coolest dad.
26:43You got to seize the moment.
26:45There you go.
26:46Every day,
26:47you get to be a cool dad.
26:48Mom is always cool.
26:50Mom is always cool.
26:51She the one.
26:52But dad,
26:52you got to seize the moments.
26:54Like, growing up,
26:54my kids are all
26:55Harry Potter fans.
26:56Now I work with them.
26:57Yeah.
26:59Do they want to hang out with him?
27:00Do they want to come to set?
27:01That's what I tell them.
27:02Dump the garbage,
27:03make up your bed,
27:04wash your dishes.
27:05Yeah.
27:05When you do that,
27:06you get to come to work with me.
27:07That's fantastic.
27:09Well, I mean,
27:10I will tell you,
27:10I got to work with you for years.
27:11It's one of the best things on earth
27:13and it's always great to have you here.
27:14Thank you so much, Tracy.
27:16Tracy Morgan, everybody.
27:18Ain't nobody like him.
27:20The Fall and Rise of Reggie Dinkins
27:21is Monday nights on NBC streams.
27:23The next day on Peacock.
27:24We'll be right back
27:25with Cassie Davis.
27:39Our next guest is an actress,
27:41director,
27:42and best-selling author.
27:43You know from her film
27:44I Love You Forever,
27:45as well as shows
27:46such as 86th
27:47and The Umbrella Academy.
27:48Her first essay collection,
27:50No One Asked For This,
27:51was a New York Times bestseller.
27:52Her latest,
27:53Delusions of Grandeur,
27:54of Romance of Progress
27:55is available now.
27:56Please welcome back to the show
27:57one of our favorites,
27:58Cassie David, everybody.
28:13Hello, Cassie.
28:14How are you?
28:16Uh...
28:18Um, yeah.
28:20No, I'm good.
28:21Yeah.
28:22I mean, I, we, you know,
28:23we've talked about this
28:24both backstage and on camera
28:26and your multiple appearances
28:27on the show.
28:27You get very, uh,
28:29you're anxious about this?
28:30Yeah.
28:31No, there's been like
28:32a countdown clock, um,
28:34for the last few weeks.
28:35Right.
28:36Where I've just been
28:36like freaking out.
28:37Yeah.
28:38And I can't do anything else.
28:39Right.
28:40My entire family's
28:41actually in town
28:42for my sister's 30th birthday.
28:44Yeah.
28:45They were not happy
28:46about my pub date,
28:47by the way,
28:47which her birthday's today.
28:49Um, my book
28:50about my 30th birthday
28:52releases today.
28:53Oh.
28:54That's, I mean,
28:55that's like sister,
28:56that's a real sister crime.
28:57Yeah.
28:58No.
28:59It was pretty good, though.
29:01Um, but yeah,
29:03so they all are asking me,
29:04like, oh,
29:04do you want to go get a drink?
29:05Do you want to go for a walk?
29:07And I'm like,
29:07I can't.
29:08I have to freak out.
29:10You know?
29:11So I literally,
29:11I have to, like,
29:12allot all this time
29:13to just freaking out,
29:14and that's what
29:15I've been doing the last time.
29:16Gotcha.
29:16So I guess if he,
29:17at my, like,
29:18the end of this question
29:19would be like,
29:20do you enjoy this at all?
29:23No, no, no.
29:23It's like, also,
29:24this is the dream, right,
29:25is to be able
29:26to come on this show.
29:27This is the worst thing.
29:30You're welcome.
29:32Yeah.
29:32It's the worst thing
29:33that can happen to you.
29:34Gotcha.
29:35Um, I'm like,
29:36like, I'm the level
29:38of nervous that, like,
29:40an Olympian probably is.
29:42Which, like, I,
29:43that's why I can't
29:43watch the Olympics,
29:44because they're just
29:45too nervous.
29:45They are.
29:46It is.
29:46I will say, you know,
29:48I can't watch any
29:48of the Olympics
29:49where falling is an option.
29:51Oh, for sure.
29:52I 100% agree with you.
29:53But isn't that all Olympics?
29:54I will say,
29:55in the Winter Olympic,
29:56it's a lot of falling,
29:57because, like,
29:58that's a surface
29:59that's, like, so,
30:00I mean, ice and snow
30:01are, like, begging you
30:02to fall.
30:02Right.
30:03Yeah.
30:03Yeah.
30:04So I totally understand.
30:04So you didn't watch
30:05a lot of the Olympics?
30:06No, I don't watch the Olympics.
30:07So for the two weeks
30:08before this moment right now,
30:10are you,
30:10do you get more
30:11and more nervous,
30:12or do you just say
30:12super nervous the whole time?
30:13Yeah, I've been doing
30:14the, like,
30:15Jesse Buckley hamnet scream
30:17when her son dies.
30:18Oh, wow.
30:19That's the level
30:20of stress you're having.
30:23How, do you want
30:24to give it to us?
30:25I don't think
30:25you guys are ready for that.
30:31Do you, uh,
30:32so this is your
30:32second book of essays.
30:33What is your process
30:34when you decide
30:35it's time to put
30:37more stuff on the page?
30:39Well, it's like,
30:40you couldn't write a book
30:41if you thought about
30:42anyone reading it ever.
30:44So you're doing,
30:44you're writing the book,
30:46and you're not thinking
30:47about that it's
30:47going to be published,
30:48you know?
30:49And you're working on it,
30:50and you're working on it,
30:51and you're like,
30:51nobody's going to read this.
30:52I can't think about
30:53anyone reading this.
30:54And then they kind of
30:55take it from you.
30:56They're like,
30:56it's done,
30:57and it has to,
30:58it has to be published.
30:59Yeah.
31:00And you're like,
31:00but no one...
31:01Because they've given you,
31:02they've given you some money,
31:03so it's their right.
31:03Yeah.
31:04Yeah.
31:05And there's a date,
31:06and it has to be done
31:07by that date,
31:07or you're, you know,
31:11I actually do.
31:12I'm very impressed.
31:13Very hard to do.
31:13I don't think a lot of people
31:14hit their deadline.
31:14I have a lot of other
31:15really bad qualities,
31:17but that's not on it.
31:18So you,
31:19so that's the problem,
31:20though, you hit the deadline,
31:20you finish your word count,
31:22and then they just take it away.
31:23They take it from you.
31:24Yeah.
31:24It's almost like
31:24it's kidnapped,
31:25you know?
31:26And you're like,
31:27no, like, it's not ready.
31:28It's, like,
31:28no one's supposed to read that.
31:29Yeah.
31:31Like, not a single word in this
31:33anyone should be reading.
31:35Gotcha.
31:36This is quite a sales pitch.
31:40Right.
31:40But I will say,
31:41I would be more excited
31:42to read a book
31:43by someone who forgot
31:45it was going to be a book.
31:47Yes.
31:48You know what I mean?
31:48That made you like,
31:49oh, that's going to be
31:49very honest then.
31:50It's actually
31:52incredibly important
31:52after the book
31:53is taken from you
31:54to forget
31:55all of the contents.
31:57Yeah.
31:58Because otherwise,
31:58you just won't get out of bed
31:59in the morning.
32:00But as I understand it,
32:02there is a,
32:03there's sort of a checkpoint
32:04that reminds you
32:05of everything you've written.
32:06Yes.
32:07So, basically,
32:08you forget everything
32:09in the book.
32:10You're like,
32:10I'm just not going to,
32:11I just don't want to remember
32:13what I wrote about
32:14and that's okay.
32:14I'll stay out of bookstores
32:15for a while.
32:16I'll just steer clear
32:17of the whole literary world.
32:18I'm going to let go.
32:19But then they're like,
32:20actually,
32:21you have to record
32:21the audio book.
32:22Yeah.
32:24And so they put you
32:26in a closet
32:28for, like, four days
32:31and they're like,
32:32now you have to recite
32:33every single word
32:34you said out loud
32:37and remember,
32:38those are the words
32:38that will be published.
32:39Right.
32:40And you can't change them.
32:41Right.
32:42Now it's written in stone.
32:44Yes.
32:44It's like some weird,
32:45it feels like an ancient form
32:47of psychological torture.
32:48Yeah.
32:48Well, because knowing you
32:51and knowing the way
32:52you approach life,
32:54I'm guessing you're not
32:55in the closet
32:56with your headphones on
32:56being like,
32:57yeah, nailed it.
33:00It's interesting.
33:01It's like,
33:01it's something
33:02a lot of pop stars say.
33:03They'll be like,
33:04can't wait for you
33:04to hear the new music.
33:06Right.
33:06It'd be weird
33:07if I was like,
33:08you know,
33:08can't wait for you
33:08to hear the new,
33:09the new words.
33:13It's like,
33:13I can definitely wait.
33:15Yeah.
33:16But it's also like,
33:17there's some things
33:18that should just
33:18never be said aloud.
33:20Yeah.
33:20And that for me
33:21was this whole book.
33:22Gotcha.
33:23Yeah.
33:24Did you ever,
33:25and I'm assuming,
33:26like, by the way,
33:26like, if, look,
33:27if I'm your publisher,
33:28I don't want anybody
33:28but you reading your words.
33:30Did you ever float to them,
33:31like, maybe somebody else
33:32should do this?
33:32Like, like,
33:33Morgan Freeman or something?
33:38I thought it would be
33:39a good idea.
33:40Yeah.
33:41So you did something,
33:43you've been doing something
33:44on social media
33:44that I was wondering
33:45if we could do now.
33:46Yeah.
33:46You have a skill,
33:48a talent, let's say.
33:49I've seen this
33:50on Instagram stories
33:51where you rename celebrities.
33:53You feel like all celebrities
33:54have a better name
33:56out there for them.
33:57So I don't give them
33:58a better name.
33:59Okay.
34:00But I kind of,
34:01by the way,
34:02this is my only skill.
34:03Okay.
34:04And it's a gift.
34:06But I more read their essence
34:09and give them a better name
34:11that fits their essence.
34:13Interesting.
34:14It's definitely not
34:15a better name.
34:16Okay.
34:16It's just,
34:17it's more apt
34:18to their essence.
34:20Yes.
34:21Okay.
34:21Do you want to try
34:22a few now?
34:23I would love to.
34:23Okay, gotcha.
34:24These are in no particular order.
34:25Okay.
34:26But it might take me,
34:27like, I have to kind of
34:27read them.
34:28No, like,
34:28do your process.
34:29Yeah.
34:29Okay.
34:30All right.
34:32And again,
34:32remember,
34:32none of this is on TV.
34:42Yeah, okay.
34:43Because he's not really a jack.
34:45Right.
34:46You know?
34:46Yeah.
34:46I hadn't thought that
34:47until now,
34:48but sure.
34:50To me,
34:51a dodger.
34:54To me,
34:55he's a dodger.
34:56Yeah, he's dodger.
34:56Dodger.
34:57Yeah.
34:57This is fantastic.
34:58I stand by that.
34:59I stand by that.
34:59Okay.
35:00Ready for the next one?
35:01Mm-hmm.
35:03Joan.
35:06I mean,
35:07now I'm starting
35:08to understand
35:09how it works.
35:14Okay.
35:16He's not a Michael.
35:17Okay.
35:17So this is a good one
35:18because his name
35:19doesn't fit him.
35:20Right.
35:22It just doesn't
35:23suit him at all.
35:24Sure.
35:24I mean,
35:25you're going pretty hard
35:26at him right now.
35:29Well,
35:29I mean,
35:30no offense to Michael
35:31is what I think
35:31that's a good thing.
35:32Yeah, yeah, yeah.
35:33To not be a Michael.
35:34Yeah, right.
35:35You're sort of saying
35:36he elevates beyond
35:37what we've come to accept.
35:38It's a very boilerplate name
35:39that, you know,
35:40let's be honest,
35:41a lot of riffraffs.
35:43I don't think
35:44you want to exude Michael.
35:45Yeah.
35:48To me,
35:49he's a,
35:52a Richie.
35:59I mean,
36:00you went pretty hard
36:01at Michael
36:02to,
36:03to end up
36:04at like Richie.
36:05I think Richie's
36:06a cool,
36:07a cool essence.
36:08Okay.
36:09I'm fascinated
36:10to see where this one's
36:10going to go.
36:11Oh,
36:11I've done him before.
36:12Yeah.
36:12Oh,
36:12you've done him before.
36:13And do you stand
36:14by your original one?
36:15I think this one's
36:16a good one.
36:16Okay.
36:18Jonah.
36:19Jonah.
36:21That's the most
36:22I've agreed with you
36:23so far.
36:23Yeah.
36:25All right.
36:26Hold on.
36:27Oh, my God.
36:27I'm so glad
36:28how many there are.
36:29Like, keep them coming.
36:31Okay.
36:31Again,
36:31we have someone
36:32who doesn't fit their name.
36:34See, now,
36:34I do feel like
36:35she's giving off
36:36Rachel vibes.
36:37This is so
36:37not a Rachel
36:38to me.
36:39Interesting.
36:40I think she's something
36:41that's a little bit
36:42more spunky.
36:44Okay.
36:50Don't rush it.
36:51Um, yeah.
36:56Josie.
36:59Now,
36:59that's a,
37:00we've had a Josie,
37:01a Jonah,
37:01and a Joan.
37:02Yeah, I do.
37:03You know what?
37:04I have done a few J's.
37:08But they're J-essences.
37:09All right, Jeremy,
37:09this is,
37:10if I've ever seen a Jeremy,
37:11this is a Jeremy.
37:12No, no, no.
37:12This is not a Jeremy.
37:13This is not?
37:14No.
37:15This,
37:16this is a Dante.
37:20That's a Dante.
37:20That's a Dante.
37:21I mean,
37:21now I totally agree with you.
37:22That is a Dante.
37:23All right,
37:23you also do,
37:24you know,
37:24you're a history buff.
37:25Oh, I can do this.
37:26Yeah.
37:31Uh-huh.
37:36Pearl.
37:40Yeah.
37:41Pearl.
37:42Pearl.
37:44Pearl.
37:45Do you think?
37:47You don't think
37:48we would have been thrown
37:49as a nation
37:49if he was a pearl?
37:51No, I think,
37:53I'm glad his name
37:54was George Washington.
37:56Yeah.
37:57That's George Washington,
37:58right?
38:03His essence,
38:04his essence is a pearl.
38:05All right,
38:06I'm putting you on the spot.
38:07Here's your dad.
38:10I know that guy.
38:11Yeah.
38:11So,
38:12this is hard.
38:13Yeah.
38:14Because unlike
38:14some of the others,
38:15he's very much
38:17Larry David.
38:18Yeah.
38:20Like that,
38:20he looks like a Larry.
38:22He looks like
38:23his last name
38:23would be David.
38:24Yeah.
38:26But I think
38:26he could also be
38:29a Clyde.
38:30Yeah.
38:32There's a little bit
38:32of Clyde vibes.
38:33I think he could be a Clyde.
38:34He could be a Clyde.
38:35Yeah.
38:35I think I'm,
38:35you know,
38:36I'm happy for all of us.
38:37He's a Larry.
38:38Yeah.
38:38All right.
38:39I'm going to risk it.
38:44I'm a Seth.
38:47I'm a Seth.
38:47I do think
38:47you're totally a Seth.
38:49Yes, thank you.
38:49But I can give you
38:50another name
38:51that I think
38:51you also are.
38:52I, I,
38:53you know what?
38:53If I like it enough,
38:54I'm going to switch it.
38:57I don't know
38:58if you're going to like it.
38:59Yeah.
39:00I'm feeling pretty confident
39:01I'm not going to.
39:05All right.
39:07So,
39:07to me,
39:11you could be a Robin.
39:18I feel like,
39:20I feel like it's going to take me
39:21a month to process that.
39:24But I'm really happy
39:24you shared it with me
39:25because I think a lot of people,
39:26if they thought that about me,
39:27would like keep it to themselves.
39:29And I think it speaks
39:30to our friendship.
39:31Listen, again,
39:31I don't think Robin
39:32is a good name.
39:33Right.
39:34But it's a good essence
39:36maybe to have.
39:40Some real,
39:41that's some real pretzel logic
39:42there right at the end.
39:44I am always so happy
39:45you're here.
39:46And come on,
39:46it's fun.
39:47You have fun
39:48when you're here.
39:48It's fun.
39:49Don't be anxious next time
39:50because I'm going to have you back.
39:51I've never had fun
39:52in my entire life.
39:52You got this.
39:53Delusions!
39:54By Kathy Davis.
39:55We'll be able to know
39:56where we might.
39:56But stick around
39:57and be right back.
40:07Come join the audience
40:08at Late Night Live
40:09in Studio 8G.
40:11For tickets,
40:11head over to
40:12LateNightSethTickets.com.
40:13Follow us at
40:14Late Night Seth
40:15on all social media platforms.
40:17Subscribe to
40:17Late Night Seth
40:18on YouTube.
40:19Find us online
40:20at LateNightSeth.com.
40:22And subscribe
40:23to the Late Night Podcast
40:24featuring a closer look,
40:25guest interviews,
40:26and more.
40:27Available wherever
40:28you listen to podcasts.
40:36I want to thank my guests,
40:38Tracy Morg and Cassie David,
40:40everybody.
40:40Thank you all for watching.
40:41We love you.
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