00:17I've been social distancing for months when the shit blew out.
00:20You know how it is when you stop hanging out with your party friends,
00:24who are also your only friends.
00:30Plus, my girlfriend just broke up with me.
00:41But that's cool because I still had work to go to every day,
00:46meetings every night, working through my steps, eating fudge stripes.
00:52Then the governor shut us down since barbershops are essential.
01:00But apparently, gun stores and liquor stores are.
01:06It's supposed to be two weeks. Remember that?
01:11So the business I spent the last ten years of my life building is closed until, uh, who the fuck
01:19knows when.
01:22Then the boys at the barbershop, they stopped talking to me because I pulled the plug on them seeing customers
01:26on the sly.
01:29I'm already buried and I'll go from this.
01:32What am I supposed to do? Spread the shit around over a paycheck?
01:37So, uh, it's been rough.
01:44But, uh, mostly I'm just grateful for having 118 days when this shitnado rolled into town.
01:53Because I know what the old me would have done.
01:57I would have crawled inside a bottle of Jim Beam and rolled this shit out from in there.
02:07Now these meetings are my lifeboat.
02:13So when the seas get rough and the waves of shit water start splashing up over the deck,
02:18I know I'll be alright.
02:20Cause you all are right here with me.
02:25Thanks, Ike.
02:27Does anyone else need a raincoat?
02:31Just, just kidding.
02:33Okay, uh, well time is up, so I'm going to unmute everyone to join me in the serenity prayer.
02:41God, God, grant me serenity.
02:44There's definitely things that I cannot change.
02:47The courage to change the things that I can.
02:49And the wisdom to know the difference.
02:53Thank you, everyone.
02:55Bye-bye.
02:57Bye, Charlotte.
02:58Bye.
02:59Bye, Sally.
03:00Bye.
03:22Bye, Sally.
03:36Uh.
03:38Bye.
03:40Bye, Sally.
03:44In.
03:45Carl.
03:46Carl.
03:47End.
03:53today we're starting right at the beginning with how to hold the harmonica
04:09angle it more
04:12perfect
04:13I fuck it up
04:14I don't know
04:16let me see up close
04:20not bad any better you might never come back to the shop
04:24you kidding man 10 minutes with y'all is like a therapy session and they're not at the comedy
04:28club at the same damn time how's Nathan and T doing anyway you know like the rest of us
04:35hey it's good on you for coming up with this you know how many black folk got jobs they can
04:39work
04:39from home one out of five the rest of us are on the goddamn front lines man I'm afraid to
04:44leave
04:45my house hey it's not much safer indoors with that no-knock bullshit you know a month ago
04:49I thought the silver lining would be the pigs to find each other fuck out considering that
04:52no one's going outside but they still killing us
04:57yeah no no I'm coming I'm coming yo I gotta get back to it we good good enough hey thanks
05:03for doing
05:03good enough man stay safe
05:04all right
05:05all right
05:32all right
05:39what's up man everything all right yeah yeah I mean no but uh I'll just call and say hi you
05:49know
05:49yeah cool what's it been since Scully's party sounds about right dude the ice luge half my lips
06:00are still stuck to it good times man how is Scully anyway I'm not sure it's uh it's been a
06:11minute
06:14whoa you two were like blood brothers I guess I must have pissed him off one too many times
06:19what happened you try to bone his grandma too
06:24I'm really sorry about that man I I didn't know she was in that bed what are you talking about
06:29that was fucking hilarious was it dude you you gotta do the thing I don't think I can anymore
06:35grandma Betty that's that that's just like your free bird I gotta see it come on let's hear it man
06:42get your greasy paws off of me
06:49guess it's funnier when we're drunk cheers man that's a little early for me
06:54don't tell me you turn into one of these five o'clock people like my girlfriend
06:57day drink is all we got left
07:01actually I'm trying to do the sober thing now
07:08wow well you picked a hell of a time I had some time in before all this started
07:14congratulations thanks man feels good you know my head's clear don't wake up looking like balls
07:20anymore and even though I can't go to my meetings in person there's tons online which is good since
07:27the first thing they teach you about recovery is not to isolate sorry man girlfriend keeps texting
07:32from upstairs about game night I didn't know you guys live together it's only because of this plus uh
07:37he's got a kid so the three of us are here together all the damn time
07:46holy shit he's adorable yeah you gotta make it that way otherwise you murder him halfway through
07:52candyland hey have fun um great catching up with you where's that ice luge when you need it
08:14you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here
08:19you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here
08:19you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here
08:19you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here
08:19you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here
08:19you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here
08:19you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here you're here
08:19you're here you're here you're here you're
09:31There he is.
09:32Hey.
09:33Uh, it's a bad time?
09:34Oh, are you kidding?
09:36Just in time for dinner.
09:37And here's my masterpiece.
09:38There you go.
09:40I put so much garlic in there, you could probably smell it through your screen.
09:44Hey.
09:45That ought to cure your COVID.
09:47Actually, I put some bleach in it, you know, just in case.
09:49But don't tell my boys.
09:51They're very picky eaters.
09:54So what's up?
09:56Whatever's up anymore, huh?
09:58Nothing.
09:59Well, you called me, so something's the matter.
10:03Wait, you run out of TP again?
10:06I, uh, called Raquel.
10:10Ah, how'd that go?
10:12It didn't.
10:13I hung up before she could answer.
10:18Did you know that she's already dating someone else?
10:20I'm sorry.
10:21Not, not dating.
10:22Uh, uh, cohabitating.
10:24Doing quarantine.
10:25All right.
10:26All right, man.
10:27People don't like being alone.
10:29Yeah.
10:30I'm aware.
10:32Yeah.
10:33Hey, Tommy, will you come here and stir this for me while I sit out back?
10:36Hey, you know what?
10:37You can call me back some other time, man.
10:38It's okay.
10:38No, no, no.
10:39It's fine.
10:39It's fine.
10:40It's fine.
10:40It's fine.
10:40I wanna talk to you.
10:41Hey, and, uh, and when I say stir it, I mean you gotta sit next to it the whole time
10:44while
10:45I'm gone, okay?
10:45The whole time?
10:48Because that's how risotto works!
10:50Good God.
10:52Ah.
10:53Sorry.
10:53Continue.
10:54Go ahead.
10:55That's stupid.
10:57Especially when so many people have actual problems, you know?
11:02You know what it's like when the only living thing you see all day is a fucking houseplant?
11:08Meanwhile, people have wives or a kid or a jacked up quarantine fuck buddy?
11:14Yeah.
11:16Yeah.
11:18Did I ever tell you about the, the bender that I went on after my wife left me?
11:24Yeah.
11:28My sons were like three and five.
11:31Oh, it was fucking epic.
11:32Ugh.
11:34Middle of the night.
11:35She, she takes him, right?
11:37So, I wake up next morning and I'm like, uh, where's my fucking family?
11:43Huh.
11:44So, I call in sick to work, I throw a case of High Life in my truck and I, you
11:50know, spend
11:50the day driving around in circles around her parents' neighborhood.
11:56And it, it did not get me my kids back.
12:00But it did get me a restraining order and a DUI.
12:03I'm sorry.
12:07Sounds rough, man.
12:14I just wish, uh, I just wish Raquel could see me.
12:21Now that I'm different.
12:23Yeah.
12:25Shit doesn't work if you're doing it to prove something.
12:28You know.
12:30Your main job now is to just focus on you.
12:35If I focus on me anymore, I'm gonna get myself pregnant.
12:40Yeah.
12:41It's not easy.
12:43It's not easy being by yourself, man.
12:46But, at the end of the day, it's really all we got.
12:51And I know you're going nuts.
12:53Stuck at home.
12:54By yourself.
12:55But, you're a creative guy.
12:57Maybe you oughta use this time to figure out how to keep yourself company.
13:02Dad!
13:03It's stuck to the bottom!
13:05Hey, go eat your food, man.
13:07Don't worry about me.
13:08Really.
13:09Yeah?
13:10You sure you're okay?
13:10Yeah.
13:11I mean, I will be.
13:15Alright.
13:16Well, you call me anytime, okay?
13:19I'm here.
13:20I love you, man.
13:21Thanks, man.
13:21Love you, too.
13:22Oh, wait.
13:22How are you gonna stir that from the couch?
13:24You got a ten-foot spoon hidden someplace?
13:40I'm so lonely.
13:43Say cheese.
13:45I'm so lonely.
13:46I'm so lonely.
13:51I'm so lonely.
13:54I'm so lonely.
13:56I'm so lonely.
13:57I get lonely.
13:59For you, baby.
14:03Yes, it's you I want.
14:07Only, baby.
14:09Only, baby.
14:11Ain't no woman been in my life since I met you.
14:18That's why I can't figure out why you're doing the thing that you do.
14:28Can I open it?
14:38I knew you were up to something.
14:42I'm so lonely, baby.
14:46Man, I'm supposed to have to live like this.
14:50I'm so lonely.
14:54I'm so lonely.
14:56All I'm so lonely.
14:57I'm so lonely.
14:57No?
15:44So I dropped out, moved home, broke up with my boyfriend because everybody knows the long distance
15:54thing ever works.
15:58And when I first got sober, I thought the accident was my bottom, but that was only part of it.
16:06It was all the things I threw away after.
16:12So now I'm right back where I started, sleeping in my old room, trying to start over again.
16:24Only I don't know how to make a new life for myself when there is no future to make.
16:55I don't know how to make a new life for myself, but I don't know how to make a new
16:58life for
16:59me.
16:59I don't know how to make a new life for me.
17:01You're making me seasick.
17:02That's because you're trying to fight it.
17:04You got to move with emotion like you're riding a horse.
17:06When have you ever gone to horseback riding?
17:09Once when my parents forced me to go to summer adventure camp.
17:12A counselor put me on a pony named Butterscotch.
17:16Butterscotch?
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