- 14 hours ago
Adult Best Friends [Full Movie] [Watch Free Online]Full EP - Full
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00:00:18To be continued...
00:00:46What are you doing?
00:00:48Nothing.
00:00:50Why are you in here?
00:00:52Maddie said the seventh grade boys are sneaking over for a kissing party.
00:00:55I know. I'm so nervous.
00:00:58Then don't do it.
00:00:58I'm calling my mom to pick me up.
00:01:00You can't. Maddie said we all have to kiss them.
00:01:02I don't want to kiss.
00:01:03Wear thong underpants. I hate thong underpants.
00:01:06But I'm worried if I wear normal underpants and no kissing stuff,
00:01:09then Maddie won't invite me to sleep over as anymore.
00:01:14Well, you could sleep over at mine.
00:01:17Tonight?
00:01:19Yeah. I mean, we're not allowed to watch TV, which sucks.
00:01:21But we could do braids.
00:01:23And I have a trundle bed.
00:01:24I love trundle beds.
00:01:26Do you have a best friend?
00:01:29No.
00:01:31You?
00:01:33No.
00:01:35Take me down, down, I don't know where to go.
00:01:38I can't come out today.
00:01:40And Katie's famous.
00:01:42But I don't give a shit.
00:01:43I've tried my best to live within two weeks.
00:01:47That's the best in me.
00:01:49What's wrong with my life?
00:01:51Yeah.
00:01:51So that's the next feature.
00:01:54You are going to be a doctor.
00:01:56I don't want to be a doctor.
00:02:04This is Katie's future.
00:02:07You can marry me to Daniel.
00:02:11Daniel is my boyfriend.
00:02:27I don't want to be a doctor.
00:02:40I don't want to be a doctor.
00:02:45okay read another post give me a hard one uh okay from seattle to savannah what a long
00:02:50strange trip it's been hashtag van life tom bryer how did you know that because tom bryer
00:02:57needs to get a job no no no get a good one okay uh okay this one's hard okay here's
00:03:06to adulting
00:03:07forever with this one he put a ring on it singular exclamation sarah casper you're cheating i'm not
00:03:12cheating i'm that good she's engaged she's a child she's 32 years old sarah casper wouldn't throw it
00:03:21all away for like some random guy that was random they've been dating since college do you have any
00:03:26snacks do you have any dinner i have peanut butter and what a spoon oh my god let me make
00:03:33you something
00:03:33i'll just have saltines at home oh my god no i'll make you um make your turkey burger i can
00:03:38put
00:03:38poblanos on top what's poblanos oh it's a giant mexican pepper it's actually our favorite pepper
00:03:47second only to the jalapeno you'll love it i promise it's really good i'm fine thank you
00:03:53well if you're not hungry maybe you want a joke that i heard today made me think you instantly okay
00:03:59this is very good okay so there there are two pigs in a pit of mud and and the wife
00:04:05pig uh turns
00:04:06to the husband and says no the husband says to the wife you're right you're right um the the husband
00:04:13pig says to the wife hey did you see farmer should we get going parties are at nine o'clock
00:04:18so
00:04:18you want to go to that yeah really my throat feels kind of weird i i feel like i don't
00:04:25know if
00:04:26everyone's sick that i you don't feel warm no good no you feel cold do you not want to go
00:04:31is it crazy to stay here i mean we have food here blankets here i'm comfortable you're comfortable
00:04:37we could watch a movie yeah but hey if katie doesn't want to go out delaney i'd love to go
00:04:41out with you
00:04:43please don't make me go alone i'm nervous and i'll get too fucked up no you will not
00:04:50like she doesn't even come out anymore because she's always with her boyfriend john i know i did
00:04:56that his name is john john john do you think she's okay right
00:05:08i'm gonna go i'm gonna go meet her i don't like him is that wrong to say you know like
00:05:13if you don't
00:05:13like your best friend's boyfriend it's the way he makes her if that makes sense i'll be pied
00:05:21oh you know what though my my contacts are already out
00:05:27that's like a whole thing only here she moves in with him kind of fast if you ask me
00:05:33but nobody asked me
00:05:36i'm gonna go meet her for a little
00:05:43yes he's hot i get it i see it but he's boring occupied
00:05:50i think she's fine
00:05:53yeah i'll come have sex
00:05:59how do you have the patience well we actually had an agreement that if i set up his wi-fi
00:06:04he
00:06:04promised to wear boxers under his shorts during our pt sessions oh well that could be worth it
00:06:09it's a give and a take but uh this looks nice right yeah i like it in the shade it's
00:06:14good
00:06:15uh oh i don't suppose i could get you to call her back maybe
00:06:20she gets so anxious when she's hung over
00:06:22no she does i just um i just wanted to ask
00:06:26how was it no my uber's now 27 minutes away
00:06:29where are you i answered a 2 a.m text from this guy
00:06:33the drugger he got
00:06:35the more he talked about julia
00:06:37not next just a female friend
00:06:39he's clearly in love with
00:06:41did she hook up
00:06:43yes he asked me to role play
00:06:45uh wow like be a cheerleader or something that's
00:06:48oh i wish
00:06:49more like we're best friends and i suddenly see him in a new light
00:06:53oh my god
00:06:54i'm gonna order a pizza to my apartment what do you want
00:06:57oh that sounds good no john and i are doing a picnic
00:06:59do you want to come
00:07:01you know what no i'll i'll just try you later
00:07:03okay bye
00:07:04all right bye
00:07:07well she's fine but she met a new guy and
00:07:13oh my god
00:07:14it's okay
00:07:14no no no
00:07:15it's okay it's okay as long as i have your undivided attention now
00:07:20yeah
00:07:20yeah
00:07:22when i first moved here it took me a while to get adjusted
00:07:25yeah you were mugged like three times that first week
00:07:28right well i thought everyone needed directions but then
00:07:32then i met you
00:07:33and you actually needed directions
00:07:35and i'm so
00:07:36so glad
00:07:39that i walked you into that coffee shop
00:07:41because you have made my life so much better
00:07:44than i ever thought that i deserved
00:07:48will you marry me
00:07:51yeah
00:07:52yeah
00:07:52yeah
00:07:56i hate the art katie left here it's so gross
00:07:58it's sentimental
00:07:59okay well i live here now and i like actual art
00:08:02let me just ask katie if she wants it before we throw it away
00:08:05where is katie i feel like she's usually here by now like
00:08:08complaining about some ugly house she can't sell
00:08:11she's doing a picnic with john
00:08:13like eating on the ground
00:08:15yeah
00:08:16i feel so bad for her
00:08:18you know it's like she misses the party last night
00:08:20and now she has to waste her entire sunday doing a picnic with her boyfriend
00:08:24can i say something
00:08:25i really don't buy john's whole i'm such a nice guy thing
00:08:28like
00:08:29you're a pervert
00:08:30you literally touch old ladies all day
00:08:32that's his job
00:08:34he's a physical therapist for old people
00:08:36katie would fall for a pervert
00:08:38i mean she's clueless
00:08:40remember that time she got you like a briefcase filled with old papers for your birthday
00:08:44those are my great-grandparents birth certificates
00:08:46why would you want that
00:08:48she likes thoughtful surprises
00:08:49she's exactly like my sister
00:08:51she's nothing like your sister
00:08:54mary had one kid and now she won't shut up about her pelvic floor
00:08:57yeah mary's the worst
00:08:58and her baby isn't even cute
00:09:01i can't imagine having a baby right now
00:09:02it's actually disgusting to have a baby
00:09:04or getting married
00:09:05kill me
00:09:07but we're pretty far from that
00:09:09we like you and me
00:09:11no me and katie
00:09:13delaney what
00:09:14you and katie are on totally different paths
00:09:16i mean katie lives with her boyfriend
00:09:19they're very serious
00:09:20and you literally still like
00:09:21fuck the first guy who shares a cigarette with you
00:09:24find out next week on that
00:09:27we love you so much
00:09:29we love you thank you
00:09:30oh thank you we love you so much
00:09:32we cannot wait to celebrate with you guys
00:09:35bye
00:09:37i love your family
00:09:38i love them
00:09:38didn't you see your sister was crying
00:09:40yeah
00:09:40no it's funny she's known for months
00:09:42how did i not find this ring
00:09:43oh the ring was in a box
00:09:45in a bin
00:09:46in an air vent
00:09:47in my office
00:09:47you would never find it
00:09:48that was never
00:09:49and how was delaney playing it
00:09:50so cool
00:09:51yeah no i didn't tell delaney
00:09:55what
00:09:57oh well i figured you wanted to tell her
00:09:59right
00:10:00yeah
00:10:00yeah
00:10:01so delaney has no idea
00:10:03no but we can call her
00:10:06right now maybe
00:10:06uh yeah
00:10:07um let's do let's call her later though
00:10:09because i think she's probably asleep
00:10:10it's fine
00:10:11we'll just call her from my phone
00:10:12it'll be a big surprise
00:10:13i promise
00:10:13yeah
00:10:16hey
00:10:16hello
00:10:18you can just leave the pizza at the door
00:10:19and i'll grab it
00:10:20thank you
00:10:26does she not have my number safe
00:10:28no she does
00:10:29i think she does
00:10:31i thought you'd be pretty excited
00:10:33to tell her
00:10:33i am
00:10:36i really am
00:10:37i just
00:10:37i just wanna
00:10:39tell her later
00:10:41right
00:10:43i know
00:10:44um
00:10:45i'm not her favorite person
00:10:47that is not true don
00:10:48she loves you
00:10:48it's just that she has a hard time with change
00:10:50you know when she was younger
00:10:51her parents sold the family minivan
00:10:53and she asked if she could go visit it
00:10:55at its new house
00:10:57that's really sweet of her to want to
00:10:59check in on it
00:11:00and then remember when i
00:11:02told her i was moving out
00:11:04she didn't talk to me for like two weeks
00:11:08and whenever i passed her door
00:11:09she'd be muttering
00:11:10benedict arnold
00:11:11right but but this
00:11:13this is a good change
00:11:14i know and i'm so excited
00:11:16and i love you so much
00:11:17and i
00:11:18and i cannot wait
00:11:19to get married
00:11:21but i i just want to make sure i tell her
00:11:23in the
00:11:24just in the right way for her
00:11:27okay
00:11:30so let's parking lot the holiday campaign
00:11:32and dig into the meat and taters of our spring into content campaign
00:11:36so this campaign is it's going to be a big lift
00:11:39so we really need to stop the scroll
00:11:41we need some big ideas
00:11:42we need some blue sky ideas
00:11:45and like we just like really need everybody on this
00:11:47but i was kind of thinking delaney
00:11:49maybe you could run a point for us
00:11:52i don't i don't really have the bandwidth for that right now
00:11:55i copy that
00:11:56luca it's all yours
00:12:00okay um wow
00:12:01yeah that's that is just that's amazing
00:12:04i do just want to flag that i'm working overtime on two major campaigns right now
00:12:08since delaney didn't have the bandwidth last month
00:12:10so it's just kind of all falling on my shoulders
00:12:13so that's that's totally fine
00:12:14i just do just want to flag that
00:12:16no and thank you for flagging that
00:12:18delaney do you think you could maybe like carve out some time to kind of tag team it
00:12:24yeah i i got a flag that i'm spread pretty thin over here
00:12:28what are you working on delaney
00:12:30putting out fires
00:12:31what kind of fires
00:12:32big ones with employees that you don't know
00:12:34right and is that why your camera's always off
00:12:37no my camera's off luca because it's allowed to be off
00:12:40okay guys i should finish up with a round of peaks and valleys
00:12:43so my valley was missing last week's happy hour
00:12:47never has someone been so missed
00:12:49but my peak is that it's on the books for next week
00:12:52popcorn to delaney
00:12:54i guess my valley was editing luca's q4 pitch
00:12:59and then my peak was it's done now
00:13:03popcorn to alex
00:13:05you know
00:13:08my valley was it ryan and i hit a speed bump
00:13:13wow
00:13:13so he he wants to open up the relationship
00:13:16and i just i don't think that i have the sexual confidence to withstand it
00:13:21so we're taking some time apart to kind of ideate on next steps
00:13:25but alex are you okay how are you feeling
00:13:29you know like i was upset
00:13:31obviously i was really upset for a beat
00:13:33but then i had a one-on-one with my best friend
00:13:35you know we went out we got some drinks
00:13:37so we blew off steam
00:13:38just like old times just the two of us
00:13:40and that like really really helped
00:13:42best friends just get it
00:13:43oh we're so aligned on that luca
00:13:48so what was dad's reaction
00:13:49we facetimed him quickly
00:13:51yeah he was really happy for us
00:13:53yeah
00:13:53i mean not that happy
00:13:57oh
00:13:58come on he was really excited it seemed
00:14:01yeah or you need to call him after five
00:14:04speaking of alcoholics how did delaney take the news
00:14:06um she's was happy fine good
00:14:10delaney doesn't know yet
00:14:12katie wanted to tell her in her own way
00:14:14before we told anybody else
00:14:15that is so classic
00:14:17i uh do you know that delaney knew that our parents were getting divorced before i did
00:14:20is that true
00:14:22yeah
00:14:22i mean uh she's my best friend so
00:14:27i think you'd get it if you had a best friend
00:14:29well my wife is my best friend
00:14:31so daria who's your best friend
00:14:33no i'd rather not say
00:14:34we're each other's best friends
00:14:36yeah
00:14:37like normal adults
00:14:40delaney loves katie
00:14:42she'll be really happy once we tell her own story
00:14:44john have you ever heard of expectation recalibration therapy
00:14:47i was reading an article about it
00:14:49excuse me
00:14:49what article
00:14:50it's an article
00:14:51where was this article
00:14:54in the journals for doctor peep doctors
00:14:56henry
00:14:57have you been listening again
00:14:59to my sessions with my patients
00:15:01anyway expectation recalibration is basically a therapy
00:15:03where you work to accept that someone will never change right
00:15:06like they suck like
00:15:07medically
00:15:08and in your case that's delaney
00:15:10and in our case it's our dad
00:15:11so i mean daria confirmed that he's a narcissist
00:15:14i have never treated your father
00:15:16and i've never made any medical claims about him
00:15:18excuse me
00:15:19but you have
00:15:19i mean we've talked about that
00:15:20what are you talking about
00:15:21you know
00:15:21what are you
00:15:22i sent him 20 of my poems in the past year
00:15:2520
00:15:27and he never once told me that i was talented
00:15:31i mean how hard is it to reply with a compliment
00:15:34how hard is it to like
00:15:35you know
00:15:36just say like a simple henry
00:15:37you are a brilliant artist right
00:15:39and it is a crime
00:15:40that you have to edit
00:15:41other people's much weaker novels
00:15:43instead of traveling the world
00:15:45on your own book tour right
00:15:46he is selfish katie
00:15:48and so is delaney
00:15:49yeah i hear you
00:15:50um
00:15:51i don't think delaney's selfish
00:15:53i think she has a hard time with change
00:15:55daria was treating our neighbor the other day
00:15:56he would know
00:15:57he's a total freak daria
00:15:58i mean he gets off on lizards
00:16:00oh my god
00:16:00and let
00:16:01did he say blizzards or it was lizards
00:16:03it was lizards
00:16:03it was lizards
00:16:04he gets off on lizards
00:16:05and his wife wants to divorce him
00:16:07clearly
00:16:08and daria said something that i think applies here
00:16:12tell them the thing about the change
00:16:15oh
00:16:15well you know
00:16:16people's nerves about change
00:16:19they can be calmed by the familiar
00:16:22so
00:16:22you take them to a comfortable environment
00:16:24and you break the news
00:16:27it's kind of like
00:16:27you take your kids to their favorite ice cream shop
00:16:30and tell them you're getting a divorce
00:16:31i mean i think that's something that you should consider with delaney
00:16:34i mean she's about as mature as an eight year old so
00:16:37seen her hork down a pint of chubby hubby in one sitting
00:16:40so we know she likes ice cream
00:16:44yeah
00:16:47that's not a real basketball
00:16:49third from the left is cake
00:16:50you know i decided i don't even want cake at my birthday this year
00:16:53i actually think it's really weird to like bring out food and then make people eat it
00:16:57did you find a bar yet
00:16:58i think i'm gonna do it here
00:17:00i'm going for a very specific aesthetic
00:17:02so if you could not invite
00:17:03ah no
00:17:05thought you'd be asleep
00:17:08katie
00:17:09i didn't know you still had a key
00:17:11uh delaney said i could keep one for emergencies
00:17:13what's the emergency
00:17:14um well this time it's not so much an emergency
00:17:17really as it is
00:17:19um
00:17:19a surprise
00:17:20for my best friend
00:17:22oh man i had actually had this whole thing planned and i was gonna sneak in and like put
00:17:26clues around the apartment but okay whatever since you're awake i'll just show you now
00:17:33what the fuck is that
00:17:35i planned us a mini beach vacation
00:17:39you don't seem excited
00:17:40what's there to be excited about katie
00:17:42it's the beach
00:17:43i'm excited
00:17:43i really am
00:17:45um
00:17:45and that poster is
00:17:47that's your most thoughtful gift yet
00:17:48you see the umbrella
00:17:49i see the umbrella
00:17:51you know these trips can be kind of weird for me
00:17:54is john at least bringing a friend
00:17:55no no john's not coming
00:17:58why yeah why
00:18:00no reason
00:18:01i just thought it would be great for the two of us to
00:18:04go on a trip connect have some quality time
00:18:07like old times
00:18:08yes yes
00:18:09just like old times
00:18:13ew
00:18:51all right there we go nice we're here what time is chat
00:18:54all right there we go nice we're here what time is chat
00:18:56can you check in at the pelican palace surprise we aren't staying at the pelican palace
00:19:01what
00:19:02yeah i got us a i got us a rental house actually on wonder weekend
00:19:06mm-hmm wonder weekend rentals kind of creeped me out
00:19:09i don't like the idea of using other people's kitchen appliances
00:19:11but you're okay sleeping in a bed or a bunch of high schoolers just
00:19:14rounded the bases
00:19:15but the pelican palace is where all the parties end up
00:19:17i know
00:19:18imagine that noise
00:19:19wouldn't sleep a freaking wink
00:19:22is there a bar
00:19:25what at the rental house
00:19:27is it a shared space or private
00:19:29private
00:19:30and there's a lockbox
00:19:32so we don't
00:19:33even have
00:19:35underneath the guy
00:19:36you found it
00:19:38oh
00:19:39gosh gps can be a little wonky here so
00:19:42so glad you guys figured it out
00:19:43how we doing
00:19:45are you uh
00:19:47are you uh douglas
00:19:49are you my fifth grade teacher
00:19:52just dougie's fine
00:19:53yeah
00:19:54i i just asked because the the listing had said that there was a lockbox
00:19:58so i didn't think we'd get to meet
00:19:59here she is
00:20:00yeah
00:20:01i love to walk everyone through the space first
00:20:03only because
00:20:05it's a really important place to me
00:20:06oh
00:20:06it was my mom's
00:20:07she uh
00:20:09she died here
00:20:11oh gosh no
00:20:12not in the front yard
00:20:14oh
00:20:15she died inside
00:20:17katie right
00:20:18so you must be delaney
00:20:19mm-hmm
00:20:20yeah
00:20:20i love that name
00:20:21family name
00:20:22it was my grandfather's
00:20:23oh my gosh
00:20:24i was named after my mom's brother
00:20:26who we don't talk to anymore
00:20:28he's uh
00:20:29he's a pedophile
00:20:30so
00:20:30oh i'm sorry
00:20:32oh no no no
00:20:32he was always
00:20:34cool with me
00:20:34yeah
00:20:36but uh
00:20:36called a lot
00:20:37you know
00:20:37when he was doing time
00:20:38yeah
00:20:39i guess inmates are like
00:20:40really hard on
00:20:41child predators
00:20:42i didn't mind saying hi then
00:20:44but once he got out
00:20:44and started coming here
00:20:45unannounced
00:20:46oh my gosh
00:20:47i keep talking and talking
00:20:49you guys probably just want to see inside
00:20:50right
00:20:51pretty cute huh
00:20:52i love it
00:20:54yeah
00:20:55mom left the place to meet my sister
00:20:57but
00:20:57lauren has a family now
00:20:58so
00:20:59she let me keep it all to myself
00:21:00ah
00:21:00score
00:21:01yeah
00:21:02oh
00:21:02all the art on the wall
00:21:03is for sale
00:21:04oh
00:21:08what little munchkin did these
00:21:10i am an artist
00:21:12yeah
00:21:12well
00:21:13technically my day job is medical sales
00:21:14but
00:21:15i've been working my tush off
00:21:17and
00:21:17is there a wifi password
00:21:19uh
00:21:19yeah
00:21:20it was in the welcome pamphlet that i sent over
00:21:24because guests are really supposed to read the pamphlet uh before they check in
00:21:27so
00:21:28oh
00:21:28but it's okay
00:21:29i have a spare
00:21:30set of rules
00:21:32right here
00:21:33oh
00:21:33perfect
00:21:33oh i also threw in my favorite local spots
00:21:36you girls hot dog fans
00:21:37dingo's dogs
00:21:38yeah
00:21:38yeah
00:21:39um we know it we used to come here near a little
00:21:41fun
00:21:42yeah
00:21:42sisters
00:21:43best friends
00:21:44i love uh best friends
00:21:45any big plans for best friends night
00:21:48um
00:21:48i think we'll probably
00:21:51hang here make a cheese plate
00:21:53you get plenty of cheese at home
00:21:56i thought we could go to a bar
00:21:58i mean i brought a lot of orange wine for us to drink here
00:22:01oh
00:22:02that's a no
00:22:04what is
00:22:05no alcohol on the premises
00:22:07that's ridiculous
00:22:09um
00:22:09what she means is we were really just gonna have a glass or two
00:22:12yeah no exception to the rules
00:22:14was it just a quick scam of the welcome email
00:22:18because no shoes is also a big one
00:22:21i can't sleep with the sound of stomping
00:22:24i thought this was a private space
00:22:25yeah
00:22:26the upstairs is your private domain
00:22:29i hang my hat in the subterranean domicile
00:22:33i live in the basement
00:22:39what are you doing
00:22:40head of file has this address
00:22:42okay well it's a good thing we're adults
00:22:43i look young
00:22:47so what happens when you stray from places you know and love
00:22:49your mom got staff at the pelican palace
00:22:51the pelican palace is fun
00:22:53they keep beers in the ice machine
00:22:55you prefer dirty ice
00:22:56over a literal deathbed yeah
00:22:58okay i put a lot of effort into planning this trip
00:23:00and i would like if we could at least relax
00:23:02and try to connect enjoy ourselves appreciate where we are
00:23:06ow
00:23:12cameras what the hell
00:23:14what
00:23:15they're where i work at urban outfitters
00:23:16all right those cameras aren't even on
00:23:18people just see them and are less likely to steal
00:23:21do you see any ironic coffee table books for sale here
00:23:24because i don't
00:23:26dougie's boarding off shoplifters he's watching us get his rocks off
00:23:29he's not camped out in front of the monitor with his hands down his pants
00:23:32he's nice
00:23:35no
00:23:36no i'm not staying here all night and being one of dougie's cheese eating cam girls okay
00:23:40i'm going to a bar
00:23:42all night at a bar
00:23:43yeah
00:23:44shh
00:23:45thing is though if it's loud
00:23:48we won't really be able to talk
00:23:50we talk all day
00:23:53i know that's a good point
00:23:57yeah let's go to a bar
00:24:01man
00:24:02this place has really changed
00:24:04it used to get packed
00:24:06i saw this pottery place in town and they have a morning class that teaches you how to make little
00:24:09bowls for your keys
00:24:10i kind of was hoping we'd sleep in
00:24:11yeah it's not till seven
00:24:13okay
00:24:15cheers to this weekend
00:24:15thank you for planning it
00:24:16um as you know we've had so many great memories here as friends and we've crossed so many milestones together
00:24:24and i thought it would be the perfect place to come to cross one more and i think that it's
00:24:30the most important thing we do if we are able to flourish together like two roses two two best friend
00:24:36i guess roses who um uh can i get a beer please that guy real hot who the helmet guy
00:24:44can i do double whiskey
00:24:46uh okay not why we're here
00:24:48um okay so i was saying
00:24:49we we have crossed so many milestones
00:24:52together here as friends
00:24:53he looks like dennis fuller
00:24:54oh dennis fuller another loser
00:24:56should we go talk to him
00:24:58i'm in the middle of saying something
00:24:59okay
00:25:00um
00:25:06you need to pick that up
00:25:07i'm gonna call him back
00:25:13uh i'm gonna be quick
00:25:14don't move
00:25:20sorry i had to get to a quiet place
00:25:22delaney dragged me to a bar
00:25:29uh yeah yeah yeah yeah it cut it cut out for a sec
00:25:32um
00:25:33not yeah not yet
00:25:34you said that you would tell her by tonight
00:25:36no no i know i i was i was just about to when you called
00:25:38well daria sent over some invitation samples and she said we should pick one by next week
00:25:43okay yeah sounds good
00:25:44i'll send you some photos and then you can decide
00:25:47or i can decide to send me photos on staff
00:25:51uh whichever
00:25:51okay
00:25:52i'll catch you later
00:25:53love you
00:25:54bye
00:25:58checking in
00:25:58all right
00:25:59you gotta check in
00:26:00i'm the social chair for sigma new
00:26:02so i got to plan this bachelor party for my almost bro-in-law
00:26:05and i always go big
00:26:07last month we had a naughty nuns and a frisky friars party
00:26:11friars are like bald priests
00:26:12tell me what do you do
00:26:13uh finance
00:26:15okay humble
00:26:17do you follow crypto
00:26:18though because he he he created apex coin
00:26:20uh gq did vote at one of their up-and-coming coins of the year this year
00:26:24but it's not a big deal
00:26:25oh my god anybody can make this low itty b coin
00:26:28nobody oh so sorry sorry
00:26:30hi
00:26:30hey um i'm katie
00:26:32hey
00:26:32katie oh my god
00:26:33you look exactly like my twins
00:26:35look at the
00:26:39is apex coin funding any strippers this weekend
00:26:41i don't pay for intimate experiences
00:26:43i do
00:26:44i wanted one real bad
00:26:46i found one online that's so mean to you
00:26:48sorry about him
00:26:49the legend himself
00:26:51it's charlie
00:26:53delaney
00:26:53katie
00:26:54nice to meet you katie
00:26:55again
00:26:56do you think it was a bad idea to have a college junior play in my master party
00:27:00uh we're actually probably gonna head out
00:27:05oh would you actually mind opening these for us
00:27:07all good
00:27:07i got it
00:27:08oh no
00:27:11party flops
00:27:13yeah
00:27:13you didn't want to use your party flop
00:27:15you
00:27:17thank you
00:27:18one beer and we go
00:27:21one beer and we go
00:27:40let's go
00:27:40yeah let's fucking go
00:27:42i'm gonna fire up some tunes
00:27:48that smells fucking awful
00:27:50oh my god that smells so bad
00:27:51wait
00:27:52i didn't smell anything
00:27:53i didn't
00:27:54what's it smell like
00:27:57yo
00:27:59did anybody see a dog walk through here
00:28:03bottle opener on the bottom of a shoe
00:28:05stop smiling
00:28:06stop
00:28:08i don't know what kind of moron walks through dog shit and has no idea
00:28:11you didn't even know how to get strippers for a bachelor party
00:28:13well not all guys like strippers that one i get
00:28:15yeah totally
00:28:16john really doesn't
00:28:17okay
00:28:17john actually doesn't
00:28:19because he has a sister
00:28:20he does
00:28:21you hung out with her like three times
00:28:23all right
00:28:27will you open the door
00:28:30you have the key
00:28:30you have the key
00:28:32no
00:28:33i have the key
00:28:34you wanted to carry it
00:28:36i have the key
00:28:38i don't have the key
00:28:41where'd it go
00:28:41it might have fallen on my pocket
00:28:43why can't you carry a purse
00:28:44i'm sorry
00:28:45i need to brush my teeth
00:28:46we can go back to the bar and look for them
00:28:47no
00:28:49you know what we have to do
00:28:51no
00:28:52yeah
00:28:54sorry again doggy
00:28:55oh that's fine
00:28:56i was only asleep for an hour
00:28:57okay good
00:28:58oh sorry
00:28:59just pop those off for me
00:29:01oh
00:29:02yeah
00:29:02sorry
00:29:03just the rules
00:29:06thank you
00:29:07i just forgot
00:29:08that's fine
00:29:09i love those flats
00:29:14oh
00:29:15sorry
00:29:18before you go back down to the basement
00:29:20what's the deal with the cameras
00:29:22oh my gosh
00:29:23i had to up my security after a nightmare renter
00:29:26ever heard of a home birth
00:29:30but the cameras don't actually record
00:29:32oh no
00:29:33they're the real deal
00:29:33yeah
00:29:34no audio of course
00:29:36because you need a permit for that
00:29:37and no cameras in the bedrooms or bathrooms
00:29:41this was all in you
00:29:42in the welcome email
00:29:43yeah
00:29:44was it just a quick skim
00:29:45because we can pop a squat
00:29:47and look things over if you want
00:29:48oh no
00:29:49we should not pop any squats
00:29:50we'd like to go to bed
00:29:52and we'd like to watch tv
00:29:54alone
00:29:55do you guys know how to work the roku
00:29:56yes
00:29:57yes
00:29:58i saw that in the binder
00:29:59she saw the
00:30:01i cracked myself up
00:30:04i don't have a roku
00:30:05it was a trick question
00:30:06you fell right into my trap
00:30:10i'm really gonna need you
00:30:11to do a refresher of the rules
00:30:12after i leave
00:30:13okay
00:30:15gonna need a verbal k
00:30:16from both of you
00:30:19okay
00:30:22hmm
00:30:24okay
00:30:26and while i'm at it
00:30:27why don't i throw us all in a group text
00:30:29just in case of emergencies
00:30:31katie
00:30:31i have your digits
00:30:32but um
00:30:34delaney
00:30:57what time is it
00:30:59it's early
00:31:01um
00:31:02it's really early
00:31:03go back to bed
00:31:10i'm gonna
00:31:11um
00:31:12i'm gonna go get us coffees
00:31:35it's a matter of privacy
00:31:36i don't
00:31:36i think it's a little weird
00:31:37for your friend's wife
00:31:38to post something
00:31:39before i
00:31:39the bride
00:31:41have posted anything
00:31:42you know
00:31:43i mean
00:31:43but you told delaney
00:31:45right
00:31:45yes
00:31:46yes i
00:31:47i told her we were engaged
00:31:48i
00:31:49i will ask them
00:31:50to take it down
00:31:51okay
00:31:51yeah
00:31:52i just don't want it up there
00:31:53okay
00:31:53i gotta go
00:31:55yeah
00:31:55all right
00:31:56i love you
00:31:57bye
00:32:25hey
00:32:27figure out
00:32:28i haven't told
00:32:29my best friend
00:32:30yet
00:32:31delaney
00:32:32who you met
00:32:32last night
00:32:33so i just need to
00:32:33you know
00:32:34figure stuff out
00:32:35so
00:32:36what she doesn't like him
00:32:37uh you know
00:32:38i mean she's
00:32:39she's not the most emotive person
00:32:40so it can be
00:32:42it can be
00:32:42it was hard to tell in the beginning
00:32:43but yeah
00:32:44she likes him
00:32:45she does
00:32:46yeah
00:32:46she does like him
00:32:47yeah
00:32:47now say it one more time
00:32:48but i want you to really mean it
00:32:49she
00:32:49she does like him
00:32:50so
00:32:52look
00:32:53a few of my friends
00:32:54weren't that happy for me
00:32:55when i got engaged
00:32:56i think they're just freaked out
00:32:58that they think your fiancee
00:32:59is gonna hijack your life
00:33:00and they're never gonna see you again
00:33:01i know
00:33:01which is crazy
00:33:02one of them
00:33:03just straight up
00:33:04stopped inviting me places
00:33:05because he said
00:33:06i don't know how to hang anymore
00:33:08not that that's gonna happen to you
00:33:10i think
00:33:10no
00:33:10no i know
00:33:11um
00:33:14yeah
00:33:14okay
00:33:14good luck with
00:33:16you know
00:33:17enjoy your coffee
00:33:18yeah
00:33:19bye
00:33:27you're up
00:33:28what time is it
00:33:29time to get up
00:33:30cold brew
00:33:30there you go
00:33:32it's beautiful out by the way
00:33:34where's my phone
00:33:35our phones are tucked away safely
00:33:37in the kitchen drawer
00:33:39why
00:33:40because today is about having fun
00:33:42without distractions
00:33:43we're gonna float around
00:33:45untethered to technology
00:33:46just like when we were little
00:33:47what happened to pottery
00:33:49we're not going to pottery
00:33:50we're gonna be wild
00:33:52crazy
00:33:53spontaneous
00:33:53we are going off the grid
00:33:55all right
00:33:59you think there's a left back there
00:34:00who's following you
00:34:01i'm following you
00:34:02why i'm left-brained
00:34:04no i'm left-brained
00:34:06which one's the one that's bad at math
00:34:08because you're that one
00:34:08that's very rude
00:34:10you know what's rude
00:34:11those are my sneakers
00:34:12and you're wearing them
00:34:13and you didn't ask me
00:34:14katie
00:34:15gwen
00:34:16oh my god
00:34:17hi
00:34:17and delaney
00:34:18hey gwen
00:34:20oh my god
00:34:20wow
00:34:21you two
00:34:22hanging out
00:34:23it's like
00:34:24stepping back into 2008 again
00:34:27i love it
00:34:30you have a baby
00:34:32congratulations
00:34:33yeah max
00:34:34she's a girl
00:34:36she's amazing
00:34:36she's such a great eater
00:34:38she sleeps 8 to 8
00:34:39wow that's awesome
00:34:40um are you here for the weekend
00:34:41oh no my partner and i
00:34:42we live here full time
00:34:43yeah we moved away from the city
00:34:44which was super scary
00:34:45but you know
00:34:45i love it
00:34:46wait did i say that you got married
00:34:48uh no
00:34:49no
00:34:50oh you know what
00:34:51i'm thinking about the other katie
00:34:52in your grade
00:34:53yeah the other katie
00:34:54she had her wedding
00:34:55featured on nautical nuptials
00:34:56amazing
00:34:57wow
00:34:59well what are you up to today
00:35:00we're probably just gonna grab some food at the deli actually in town
00:35:04oh my god
00:35:05their lox is what got me through my second trimester
00:35:08just the craziest cravings with this little one in the pistachios
00:35:11fish cottage cheese butt stuff whatever
00:35:14you name it i had it
00:35:15oh crazy idea alert
00:35:17but we're actually having a bbq at mine today
00:35:19you should come
00:35:19is it a party
00:35:21it's a bbq
00:35:22yeah
00:35:23come
00:35:24oh
00:35:30sorry we just we get it a little crazy on the weekends
00:35:34well i mean as you know crazy as we can with a little one
00:35:40um so what is it you do theo
00:35:43i'm a filmmaker
00:35:46yeah commercials
00:35:47yeah he just got back from tokyo
00:35:49oh wow
00:35:50you know i hear japan's amazing
00:35:52what commercial were you shooting
00:35:53um it's nothing
00:35:56sweetie
00:35:56just don't tell them
00:35:58oh he's being so modest
00:36:00he's being modest
00:36:01he was shooting a watch commercial
00:36:03with brad pitt
00:36:05and natalie portman
00:36:06oh wow
00:36:07uh that's
00:36:08that's so cool
00:36:09did you get to meet them
00:36:10the celebrities
00:36:12yeah that's not really why i do it though
00:36:17no of course not
00:36:18yeah
00:36:19oh hello
00:36:21oh
00:36:22oh hi
00:36:23oh no careful she she can bite
00:36:25oh
00:36:25she does
00:36:25uh well yeah i guess she really likes you
00:36:29um i've never seen her do that with anyone but me
00:36:40i think um yeah i think it's your turn daddy
00:36:43you know i'm pretty sure i read in the book that it's better to let him cry it out right
00:37:15no that's for um when we're putting her to sleep
00:37:17all these families what were they supposed to be
00:37:19you could always invite strangers into this house
00:37:21first it was the kitten in the garage
00:37:23now it's these spinsters from your past
00:37:26baby
00:37:27we have a child
00:37:29we do
00:37:30wow i just forgot about the 46 hours of labor and my torn anus
00:37:34oh
00:37:34the chatty one is hiding something and i know that you don't care
00:37:38but the new keeps on fiddling with noodle i want them gone
00:37:41i want my life back
00:37:48ladies i couldn't find any weed but some ketamine
00:37:52fuck
00:38:00oh it hit my spine
00:38:05oh my god since when is petting a dog weird it's not like i was only petting tail
00:38:10i'm serious okay well i'm not hiding anything they're just freaking nuts whatever that's the
00:38:16most excitement they've seen in months so yeah her partner just shot a commercial with brad's pit
00:38:20but i hear you yeah they clearly hate each other hate each other maybe they're a little tired
00:38:25she had a baby or maybe they were in love and then they had the baby
00:38:30and now they hate each other that's real nice i'm i'm sorry that's the reason i don't want kids
00:38:35all right i know you want kids i mean it i don't want kids
00:38:40okay you don't mean that don't say that um i do mean it i don't want kids
00:38:45delena you don't mean that stop can we not have this conversation because that really put a
00:38:52damper on my entire day yes okay sorry um okay what do you want to do
00:39:00follow me
00:39:02Okay.
00:39:24I'm going to get this with my name on it,
00:39:26and she's going to get this with her name on it.
00:39:31What's the other 2%?
00:39:33Um, Carol Beagle?
00:39:36Oh, he's going to get this with my name on it.
00:39:49Oh, he's going to get this with my name on it.
00:39:53This ain't no ghetto, Joe.
00:39:58Okay.
00:40:00You're on the payroll, don't see now.
00:40:05No!
00:40:37Really?
00:40:38Yes, he cuts his toenails in the car.
00:40:40That's a good thing.
00:40:40No.
00:40:41Shots!
00:40:42Keep it going all-nighter!
00:40:44Oh, hi, Kyle.
00:40:46You sure you're allowed back in here?
00:40:51Dude, I'm so embarrassed.
00:40:53How can we make this up to you?
00:40:55Um, I guess one of you could eat some dog shit.
00:40:58Shit, I'll do it.
00:40:59No, I'll do it.
00:41:01I'll do it.
00:41:02I am so sorry that we keep subjecting you to this.
00:41:04Let's just do a round of fireball shots for everyone.
00:41:10You like fireball?
00:41:12I love fireball.
00:41:16Let's fucking go.
00:41:20What is with who?
00:41:22What's up, Kaylee?
00:41:24Oh, my God, dude.
00:41:26I gotta go to the bathroom.
00:41:27Well, we've been having so much fun.
00:41:29It's been hard to find the right time to tell her.
00:41:32Right.
00:41:33But more importantly, as soon as you tell her, it's gonna be weird.
00:41:37Uh, yeah, that too.
00:41:39All right, then don't think about it and just have fun.
00:41:41I can't not think about it.
00:41:44She is going to find out.
00:41:46Mm-hmm.
00:41:48Oh, my God, you're so stressed.
00:41:50I know.
00:41:51I know.
00:41:51I can feel your heart beating in your chest.
00:41:54I know.
00:41:55I know.
00:41:56Well, my fiancé wants to try for kids as soon as we get married.
00:42:00Oh.
00:42:00So this will be the last time I see my friends for the next 18 years.
00:42:07That's so sad.
00:42:08I know.
00:42:09Don't say that.
00:42:10I agree.
00:42:10The fact is that we're getting older, and we're not gonna have a lot more weekends like this.
00:42:14We're not 80 years old.
00:42:15This is not your last hurrah.
00:42:17Do you know what a bachelor party is?
00:42:18By definition, it is a last hurrah.
00:42:20I think you're being dramatic.
00:42:22I don't think so.
00:42:26Maybe we get another drink?
00:42:28Yes.
00:42:28Is that an awful idea?
00:42:29No, it's a good idea.
00:42:31Okay, twist your arm?
00:42:32Twist my arm.
00:42:33I don't really do the whole American idealization of excess, super-sized thing.
00:42:37Well, except when it comes to real estate, because tiny homes scare me.
00:42:41Oh.
00:42:43Beijing.
00:42:45Hold those.
00:42:49What's his deal?
00:42:51Oh, he's a good dude.
00:42:52And he's, like, low-key rich now, too.
00:42:54But he only dates models.
00:42:56Sorry.
00:42:57Hey, um, are you single?
00:43:00Yeah, I'm single.
00:43:02Same.
00:43:03I mean, me and my boys have, like, a strict no-dating policy for junior year.
00:43:07I love that.
00:43:08I wish my friends got that.
00:43:11Could you be putting a good word with, uh, Tommy?
00:43:14Like to date?
00:43:15No.
00:43:16I'll like to smash.
00:43:17Yeah, I'll just watch.
00:43:20Yeah, I'll ask him.
00:43:21Less of an ask and more of a temperature check.
00:43:23Just check it out for me.
00:43:25It's my mission to get you kissing.
00:43:28Oh!
00:43:29Phil, Tommy, family fireball shots!
00:43:33Oh, fuck.
00:43:34But now I think about the fish out.
00:43:36Down in the Caribbean sunshine.
00:43:39In my younger days, I was so bad.
00:43:42Laughing about all the fun we had.
00:43:45Seen and let the feel the world spin.
00:43:47Mixing different ocean feet and cousin.
00:43:49Listen to the drummers and the night sound.
00:43:51Listen to the singers make the world fun.
00:43:54Oh, fuck.
00:43:55I forgot to vote.
00:43:57Uh, guys, there's nothing open.
00:43:59We really don't need to force the night.
00:44:00No, no, no.
00:44:02We said all-nighter.
00:44:04We did.
00:44:04I feel like Tommy Delaney still need to clap cheeks.
00:44:07What are you talking about?
00:44:09Nothing.
00:44:09He's drunk.
00:44:10Ignore him.
00:44:10Well, we would invite you back to the Pelican Palace bar.
00:44:13But it is, I've been told, an out-of-order vending machine in the parking lot.
00:44:20So they can't host.
00:44:21They can't host.
00:44:22Do you?
00:44:24You guys, should we just call it?
00:44:26Yes.
00:44:26No, no.
00:44:27Let's go to ours.
00:44:30What about Dougie?
00:44:32No.
00:44:33We'll be quiet.
00:44:38Sorry.
00:44:39This is the only room in the house without cameras.
00:44:41I have cash.
00:44:42Yeah, I think I should probably take Phil home.
00:44:45No.
00:44:46No.
00:44:47You should stay here.
00:44:49Charlie and Katie, they'll be back any second.
00:44:51I'm friends with Danny.
00:44:52Or we could play a game.
00:44:55You guys ever heard of Twister?
00:44:57Oh, man.
00:44:59The beta thighs brought it to the hockey house last spring.
00:45:03No, seriously.
00:45:04I told Phil's wife I'd watch him.
00:45:06I think it's time for us to go.
00:45:08Phil?
00:45:09I'm good.
00:45:09Chill.
00:45:09Come on, we'll go back to the hotel.
00:45:11I think we should get Phil coffee.
00:45:12Phil, do you want a coffee?
00:45:13Don't fucking touch me.
00:45:15All right, yeah, let's get Phil coffee.
00:45:18Is that okay?
00:45:19Yeah, go get me fucking coffee and get out of here.
00:45:22Great, let's get Phil coffee.
00:45:23Bye.
00:45:25This guy fucking thinks he knows what it's like to fucking live in a house with three women.
00:45:28No offense.
00:45:29You're awesome.
00:45:30Ooh, a smooth banana IPA.
00:45:33That could be your wedding drink, like your bride's signature cocktail.
00:45:38I'm not doing any of that stuff.
00:45:40Right, because you're, like, cool bride.
00:45:43Yes, yes, that's right.
00:45:45What's your signature cocktail?
00:45:47Well, I'm a cool groom, so I can't do that.
00:45:50Oh.
00:45:50You might actually be too cool of a groom if it takes you seven years to propose.
00:45:57Look, love happens in its own time.
00:46:00Oh, right.
00:46:00It's, you know, I don't make the timetable.
00:46:02Love makes the timetable.
00:46:03And that's what you told her?
00:46:04Yeah.
00:46:04Yes, that's what I told her.
00:46:05And how much time did that buy you?
00:46:07Seven years.
00:46:09Ah, ah, ah.
00:46:10I see.
00:46:12What made you wait so long?
00:46:14I just wasn't sure.
00:46:17About your fiance?
00:46:18About any of it.
00:46:19I just, I just didn't know if that's what I wanted.
00:46:22You know, I just think it's this thing that we all think we're supposed to do because everybody else does
00:46:26it,
00:46:26but we never stop and ask ourselves if it's what we actually want.
00:46:30And then I realized that I did want it, and I do want kids,
00:46:35and that eventually I just had to get out of my own way and find somebody that I liked
00:46:40and use good judgment and be smart and just, you know, pick them and be happy.
00:46:48So romantic.
00:46:49I don't care if you don't think it's romantic.
00:46:51It's honest, and honesty is what sustains a marriage.
00:46:55It's not romance.
00:46:57I mean, you actually don't think that there's one person for everyone?
00:47:03I'm sorry, you can't be serious.
00:47:05What?
00:47:06One person for everyone?
00:47:07No, of course not.
00:47:08I think there are millions of people that we can connect with.
00:47:11It's just a matter of when you meet them.
00:47:13We're not marrying these people because of timing.
00:47:17Don't say we're marrying them because of soulmates,
00:47:19because I'll leave you here with those beers.
00:47:25We are marrying them because we love them.
00:47:29Yes.
00:47:31I mean, right?
00:47:33I said yes.
00:47:35I, you're not selling me.
00:47:37Do you know?
00:47:38That's not my job.
00:47:39Oh!
00:47:40This coffee expired six years ago.
00:47:43Coffee doesn't expire.
00:47:44I got cash money, baby girl.
00:47:46Remember that stuff from the 90s?
00:47:47Don't worry about that.
00:47:48We'll give you some tap water, okay?
00:47:49Or like Windex or something.
00:47:50Would you like to share a glass of wine?
00:47:52What?
00:47:54Someone found a speaker.
00:47:56Connect.
00:47:57No, I have to conserve my battery for the Uber so we can leave.
00:48:00You remember leaving?
00:48:01You can use my phone for the music.
00:48:03No offense, but you probably don't have my kind of music on your phone, so...
00:48:07What kind of music do you like?
00:48:09House.
00:48:09But a very specific kind of house.
00:48:11I like specific house.
00:48:13Oh my God.
00:48:14Just listen to your music, okay?
00:48:15Put on your phone.
00:48:16I'm fine.
00:48:17Are you...
00:48:17Put on your phone.
00:48:18I'm fine.
00:48:19Oh, Tommy.
00:48:22I'm coming, Tommy.
00:48:28I'm going to make two glasses of wine still for...
00:48:31If anyone wants to stay and drink it with me.
00:49:01Delaney, can you fire for some pizzas, hon?
00:49:05For the guys, at least?
00:49:07I mean, I'm happy to host those.
00:49:09Yeah, you don't seem anxious about it at all.
00:49:10Well, I'm just a little worried.
00:49:12If I get a bad review, that is on you.
00:49:14What is with you in this review?
00:49:15Are you in some sort of legal bind?
00:49:17No.
00:49:18No, but...
00:49:19I will write you a comment if they give you a shitty review.
00:49:22Oh, oh.
00:49:23You know...
00:49:25Um...
00:49:25We can just go back to my hotel, if you want.
00:49:28I mean, just say the word.
00:49:32Charlie, I can't.
00:49:34I'm engaged.
00:49:35You know, I...
00:49:37Trust me.
00:49:41I feel it, too.
00:49:42But there's not...
00:49:43Oh, I'm sorry.
00:49:44I meant, like...
00:49:46I meant all of us would go back to my hotel, like...
00:49:49Instead of you hosting here, just because you seemed anxious about it?
00:49:53Yeah, no.
00:49:54I'm...
00:49:55I'm so sorry.
00:49:56Um, just because we'd been flirting, so I thought that you were...
00:49:59I wasn't suggesting that you and I would go back alone to my hotel.
00:50:03I hope I wasn't giving off that impression.
00:50:06I mean, did you think the friendly banter meant that I was gonna, like, cheat on my fiancé?
00:50:11No.
00:50:12No.
00:50:20I gotta...
00:50:20Okay.
00:50:22That's a fad, dude.
00:50:26Delaney, what the fuck are you doing?
00:50:28We said we'd stay in the bedroom.
00:50:30Delaney!
00:50:31Phil, buddy?
00:50:32Time to go.
00:50:33Finally.
00:50:33Yeah, let's go.
00:50:34No.
00:50:34Stay.
00:50:35You can go to my room.
00:50:36I'll make it fun.
00:50:37No.
00:50:38No, thanks.
00:50:39Is it because I'm not a model?
00:50:40No, because I don't share a genuine connection with you, and it feels weird to lead you on.
00:50:44Oh, fuck you.
00:50:45You know, I came here to celebrate an important time in Charlie's life.
00:50:49I tried to politely keep my distance so I could spend time with my friends, who I never see.
00:50:53But you inserted yourself into our plans and put us all in a very weird situation.
00:50:58So, honestly, fuck you, Delaney.
00:51:00No.
00:51:01No.
00:51:02No, no, no.
00:51:03Fuck you, Tommy.
00:51:05Fuck you.
00:51:06Because that, that's the dopest girl that I've ever met.
00:51:10And you may not get her.
00:51:13But I do.
00:51:22I think I love you.
00:51:29What?
00:51:31What are you talking about?
00:51:34What?
00:51:35No, no, no, no, no.
00:51:36What is going on here?
00:51:38Who are these people?
00:51:39Mom's house?
00:51:40Can you not?
00:51:41On the art?
00:51:42I'm sorry.
00:51:43I'm sorry.
00:51:43They are about to leave.
00:51:45Additional guests?
00:51:45Shoes inside?
00:51:47Alcohol?
00:51:49You agreed to the rules.
00:51:51I know.
00:51:51I know.
00:51:52I'm sorry.
00:51:52There were a lot of rules.
00:51:54And honestly, no alcohol is crazy.
00:51:55So...
00:51:56Yeah, because I don't want to relapse again.
00:51:58I'm two years sober.
00:52:00What is wrong with you people?
00:52:01This is my house.
00:52:02It kills me that I have to rent this out.
00:52:05But with my mom's leftover medical bills, I don't really have...
00:52:12Really?
00:52:14I'm not going to not do the coke.
00:52:18Hi, honey.
00:52:19Hi.
00:52:20We're here for Big Dick Phil.
00:52:23Oh, my God.
00:52:24I'm him.
00:52:25Phil, please tell me that you didn't hire...
00:52:28Delaney said I could.
00:52:29I said he could.
00:52:30Because guess what?
00:52:31All guys like strippers, Katie.
00:52:33Even your lover, Charlie.
00:52:35Okay, well, he's not my lover.
00:52:36I mean, you have been eye-fucking her all week, dude.
00:52:39See?
00:52:40Whoa.
00:52:41What about my sister?
00:52:43Let's not chill.
00:52:44What are you talking about?
00:52:45She's engaged.
00:52:49You knew?
00:52:52Charlie knew.
00:52:54Hey, we're drunk, okay?
00:52:55Let's not talk about this right now.
00:52:57You don't want to talk about how you hid your engagement from me for an entire weekend?
00:53:01Can you stop?
00:53:02How you put our phones in a kitchen drawer?
00:53:05Stop.
00:53:05You're a psycho.
00:53:06Hey, you're a fucking bitch.
00:53:09Okay, this is just sad.
00:53:10I can't dance here.
00:53:12Same.
00:53:12Friendship stuff is super triggering.
00:53:15Yeah.
00:53:23Okay.
00:53:24I got another girl, but it'll take her 45 minutes to get here.
00:53:28Get out!
00:53:29You get out?
00:53:32You're a pervert.
00:53:34You filmed us.
00:53:38Pervert, pervert, pervert, pervert, pervert, pervert, pervert.
00:53:45You're creepy!
00:53:47You don't treat guests this way!
00:53:53Everywhere's closed, Delaney.
00:53:54I'm talking to you.
00:53:55Okay, but nowhere's open.
00:53:56You don't know everything.
00:54:04Oh, hello.
00:54:07I'll have one pizza for one person.
00:54:12I can go home.
00:54:16He says it's going to be five minutes, so...
00:54:19Didn't want to know what type of pizza?
00:54:20I always get pepperoni, and they always know, so...
00:54:23Yeah, I didn't hear a credit card number.
00:54:26I'm paying cash for Chuck.
00:54:27Mmm.
00:54:34There you go.
00:54:52Bye.
00:54:53Tommy took my charger into his room, and...
00:54:58I know but alright well Kyle's also not exactly the most reliable narrator I can't look I'm
00:55:09gonna be home in a few hours no I'm here
00:55:19no my service is fine I'm gonna I'll be home in a few hours and then we can talk
00:55:32ok ready great four hours and 37 minutes to destination
00:55:58you
00:56:05you
00:56:07you
00:56:07you
00:56:07you
00:56:21you
00:56:34you please talk about last night about what all that I mean
00:56:44do you remember any of it I know you can black out big chunks when you drink like that
00:56:53I remember that you lied to me about getting engaged I remember that I tried to tell you
00:56:59that first night I had this whole thing planned it's the whole reason we did the trip
00:57:05you lied to me all weekend no I tried to tell you all weekend another lie that's great
00:57:13why do you always lie honestly you lie to me all the time I'm not a liar it's just really
00:57:18hard to
00:57:18be honest with you I mean you hate everything you hate everyone I don't hate every admit you hate
00:57:25John admit it you've never liked him you roll your eyes when we talk you don't laugh at his jokes
00:57:31I
00:57:31don't know why he's so sweet but you have always hated him I hate how boring he makes you boring
00:57:36why
00:57:36cuz I don't want to babysit your fucking benders least I'm not stuck in some sad routine I'm not sad
00:57:42I'm
00:57:42happy you look happy why don't you call it I'm serious why don't you leave the city go drown your
00:57:50personality white wine with Gwen that sounds better than staying here and wasting it with you one
00:57:55weekend at a time why don't you try caring about something why don't you try making a fucking effort
00:58:06why don't you grow up I am okay doing cocaine is fun Katie okay yeah well maybe we're too different
00:58:14now yeah maybe we are
00:58:25get out
00:58:33hey there she is how you doing you feeling okay yeah let's go out of the shower
00:58:38okay
00:58:54I keep the hurt I'd rather feel and watch the shadow from
00:59:12there were two pigs okay and they're in the same pit of mud and the wife pig turns over to
00:59:18the
00:59:18husband pig and she says have you seen farmer joe's pants lately
00:59:28why would you cancel the husband goes oh that's so funny I thought he said pork chop
00:59:44thank you thank you so much I don't really have a nice time
00:59:54oops did a thing officially secured series b fundy for my startup
01:00:02how do you think posted that oh oh oh oh um
01:00:08Elon Musk uh no no it's someone we know oh oh uh
01:00:17I give up okay um no it was Diane's date from uh New Year's
01:00:23no I don't I don't I don't even think I've met her oh is she friends with Delaney speaking of
01:00:29which is Delaney coming to dinner this weekend I don't think so why well we're gonna fight
01:00:38the two of you are fighting yeah that's maybe never happened in the history of the world
01:00:44what happened um it's very dumb it was about the engagement
01:00:50I so I never actually told her she found out on my phone and went ballistic and
01:00:56wait wait wait what do you mean you didn't you didn't tell her that
01:00:58I remember I tried and you called so I couldn't really and then I tried later that night and it
01:01:02got
01:01:03extremely weird and then no no no don't don't don't do that I let you wait until the perfect
01:01:09moment to tell her how you wanted to tell her and you said you would do that on the trip
01:01:13you told
01:01:13me you would handle that on the trip so we could start planning our wedding I mean you're a little
01:01:18obsessed with planning the wedding well yeah I want to celebrate our marriage with our family and our
01:01:22friends no offense I don't think you really get it you know I don't think you get me and Delaney
01:01:27exactly I don't think you could how do you how do you say that I've been nothing but accommodating
01:01:32to you and your friend she has a drawer in our dresser you said that was fun it was
01:01:38it is but I just want to know when you're going to choose us right when when you will stop
01:01:45bending
01:01:45our lives together for Delaney it's not just Delaney no no no no what do you what do you what
01:01:53do you
01:01:53mean you know marriage can really change your life and and a lot of times for the better which I
01:01:59think
01:01:59will be you know our case and I'm very excited of course but there's just a lot of changes like
01:02:04for
01:02:04example you know eventually we will probably want to move out of the city and that's fine and I'm
01:02:08you know we'll do that for you and you go out there and then all of a sudden all your
01:02:13friends
01:02:14are married couples that moved out there too and and nobody knew you before you were a married
01:02:18couple so it's actually a bit like you didn't exist before you were part of a married couple
01:02:22so that's the new you I'm just gonna I'm just gonna stop you I don't even know what to believe
01:02:26you
01:02:29John
01:02:34so anyways popcorn to Delaney I didn't have any peeks this week
01:02:41well a week of valley spends time in our cal eventually everything okay yeah it's everything's
01:02:48okay Delaney we're here if you ever want to share obviously but you seem to hate peaks
01:02:52and valleys so I don't hate peaks and valleys really once you thought you were muted and you
01:02:58screamed fuck when we started playing the game okay fine um my valley was
01:03:10my best friend lied to me about getting engaged
01:03:17what wow wow that is a deep valley very deep
01:03:23okay let's dive into this let's dive into this come on we're here for you
01:03:30wow your hair I always pictured pictured you as a blonde
01:03:35look at you okay so wait tell me everything who is this fiance what's his name
01:03:42John where's John from yep John the Midwest what state Minneapolis
01:03:51Michigan or Minnesota it's an M I just I can't remember right now you seem like you
01:03:57must hate him I don't hate him I don't hate John that's very nice it's your best
01:04:02friends you're trying to be nice but like what did he do he obviously cheated he
01:04:06obviously cheated he did cheat Alex he cheated off John did not cheat John's not a
01:04:10cheater he's totally obsessed with her
01:04:15but too obsessed probably no no no to where it's like true crime no he treats her
01:04:26really well he's a very good guy so he treats her well yeah he treats her well wait and she
01:04:36is she
01:04:36like happy with him yeah okay wait sorry for the disconnect here but what's the problem
01:04:49and the toy guy said that that's the most popular thing he sells yeah no the kids wanted
01:04:53one of these I I just got them a new globe but never enough where's John I use a work
01:05:00thing oh did he
01:05:02decide if he wanted the chicken or lamb skewers for the cocktail hour shoot uh I'll ask him I'm not
01:05:07sure if you get that thing wet it turns blue so he's rehabbing brittle hips after sundown he's really burning
01:05:14the midnight oil
01:05:16and um if you wanted to go back to red again you just put it in the sun is there
01:05:20trouble in paradise
01:05:23you can't hide from an empath little sister um Delaney and I got into a fight and now John and
01:05:31I are
01:05:33in a bit of a fight about that fight of course no no we all saw this coming you know
01:05:39you guys are
01:05:39emotionally stunted Daria says you both have arrested development I never said that you just
01:05:44happened to leave your notebook open to a page that said never individuated into adulthood did you find
01:05:49the key to my office again it doesn't matter look the medical fact is you guys are basically still kids
01:05:53who are clinging on to each other in the cafeteria of life you're emotionally stunted
01:05:59oh that's a very mature response Katie do you see what I'm saying
01:06:04you're stunted it's so rich coming from you look I'm sorry I really hate to be the one to have
01:06:10to
01:06:10tell you this but it might actually be time for you to grow up we have all had to did
01:06:15we I mean did
01:06:17we all have to you're like 40 years old and you still blame everything on our parents you're emotionally
01:06:21stunted not me tell him Daria no no no Daria tell her that she's narcissistic like dad do you know
01:06:26that the DSM-5 defines narcissism as a personality disorder right Daria a cluster B personality disorder
01:06:32which I think we can both agree you have I have personality disorder oh my god you're delusional
01:06:37you're you're literally medically delusional you're you're certifiable Daria tell him you have every
01:06:42symptom tell him tell him he's literally shut up you shut the fuck up today I listened to a man
01:06:54detail an intense reptilian fetish that's ruining his marriage and I had to tell him no that's not weird
01:07:01that you want an iguana to act as a third a girl ate rocks in front of me and I
01:07:09had to tell
01:07:10a mother who told me that she lost her pregnancy I had to promise her that she would get over
01:07:18it one
01:07:18day do you guys want a medical diagnosis you are both ungrateful I can't believe she said all that
01:07:39stuff about her patients I mean isn't that supposed to be like really private okay I know we didn't
01:07:50have the ideal childhood but you cannot keep using it as an excuse I mean come on can you be
01:08:00the adult
01:08:00for once can you help me for once things are gonna be okay with John
01:08:12I don't know actually yeah he's he's really mad people get mad Katie it's part of life and it's gonna
01:08:23be a long road if you walk around trying to make everything nice for everybody all the time
01:08:27you've got to be honest I know what Delaney means to you and I know how much she was there
01:08:35for you
01:08:35when you were kids and yes I maybe thought that you were freaks but what you had was special
01:08:42you guys had a great run so maybe it's okay that it's over sometimes the past can't last
01:09:04okay I made a guest list pretty much everyone who's coming is cool except for like one other
01:09:09assistant from my office have I shown you her grid before she posts so much emo shit it's like
01:09:15we get that you have cancer maybe she won't support what we're seeing it helps other people
01:09:24oh it doesn't help me I meant other sick people right wait how much do we hate Katie like we
01:09:32haven't
01:09:32talked about this at all yeah what she did wasn't great you know what I always say
01:09:39hate motivates liking stuff I can motivate too no liking stuff is for sheep plus hating stuff is
01:09:47like our thing we both know the whole world sucks the whole world sucks yeah
01:09:57I think I need to leave I mean same this place is a shithole like it's obviously a temporary
01:10:07situation no I just don't want to be around you anymore I hate that we love to hate people
01:10:17it makes me feel sick and I want to feel good I want to be happy I would be happy
01:10:26for other people
01:10:26I want to be happy for my family I want to be happy for my friends
01:10:33but I don't know how to do that I don't know how to be happy for people
01:10:46did you like write that in your notes app to say to me that's so fucking lame Delaney
01:10:57just keep breathing oh okay other side one second sorry Delaney hi what happened is everyone okay
01:11:13okay what yeah then why are you here where are you from Illinois I knew that did you like it
01:11:39there
01:11:40in Illinois do you mind sure
01:11:47who is it
01:11:51who is this
01:11:53yeah
01:11:57yeah I lived in Illinois pretty much my whole life high school college
01:12:03go Phoenix's it was our college mascot yeah my whole family went there and I am so sorry
01:12:10that I didn't tell you that I was going to propose to Katie
01:12:15it's okay
01:12:18probably made you hate me even more
01:12:20I never hated you I hated you existed
01:12:25that was I right
01:12:30you never did anything wrong
01:12:34I did everything to make it incredibly weird for you and I'm I'm really sorry
01:12:47I'm really happy it's you
01:12:52I will let you back to work
01:12:55yeah yeah
01:12:58we're actually in a fight
01:13:01she lied to me about telling you
01:13:04and I just don't understand why she can't be honest with me
01:13:11I don't know
01:13:14maybe she's afraid of losing us
01:13:18or maybe it's
01:13:21trying to protect us
01:13:23you really don't know
01:13:28I do know that
01:13:32getting older is
01:13:36really scary
01:13:43I'm not paying for this
01:13:46I got his card on file
01:13:50can we talk
01:13:52I mean what are we doing
01:13:54I can't take more silent treatment
01:13:59that's my client Jerry
01:14:04uh yeah I know Jerry
01:14:07do you know his wife Marlene
01:14:10you know they've been married for years
01:14:12lived in four states
01:14:13three countries
01:14:16they got divorced
01:14:17got back together
01:14:20lived in next door houses
01:14:21just for their own space
01:14:25so they built this place
01:14:28together
01:14:31I don't know what the rest of our lives will look like
01:14:34but it can be whatever we want it to be
01:14:38I love you
01:14:38I love you
01:14:39I love you too
01:14:40I'm sorry
01:14:43I'm sorry
01:14:45I'm sorry I lied
01:14:48and I'm gonna do better
01:14:50I know
01:14:50I know
01:14:51she told me
01:14:53who
01:14:55Delaney
01:14:57um
01:14:58when
01:14:59when did you see Delaney
01:15:01today
01:15:01she came by the office
01:15:04why
01:15:05she's like
01:15:05what
01:15:06like returning the stuff
01:15:07I had in her apartment
01:15:08or
01:15:11she
01:15:12wanted to know
01:15:13where I was from
01:15:17yeah
01:15:20actually
01:15:25go get your girl
01:15:29go on
01:15:30yeah
01:15:31yeah
01:15:36open up your gate
01:15:37there you go
01:15:45we'll be right back
01:15:45yeah
01:15:47yeah
01:15:48yeah
01:16:01yeah
01:16:02it's all right
01:16:05yeah
01:16:05yeah
01:16:06yeah
01:16:06yeah
01:16:06yeah
01:16:11Katie, no. There's a list and you're not the aesthetic. And honestly, even if you were, there's already a Jennifer
01:16:17here and you can't, like, have a Jennifer and a Katie, you know?
01:16:20Yeah, okay. Um, Roxy, I know you think I'm lame, but I know that you're miserable and that's why you're
01:16:27so mean.
01:16:28But I feel bad for you. Okay?
01:16:33Yeah. Same.
01:16:35Yeah. Uh, where's Delaney? Where do you think?
01:16:39Fuck.
01:16:45Occupied! Occupied!
01:16:46Delaney, drop the drugs! I said occupied!
01:16:53So I was gonna... Sorry, um, can I go first? Because I'm feeling brave and that might go away.
01:17:01What?
01:17:08I look at you and I feel like we are still 12 years old.
01:17:13And I really love that.
01:17:16But we're not 12 years old anymore and we can't spend every second together anymore.
01:17:26And we don't like all the same things anymore, as much as I try to fight that.
01:17:32And I want to get married.
01:17:35And I want to have kids.
01:17:38And I want to save pictures of bathroom renovations I like.
01:17:45And I want to make little dishes for my keys.
01:17:48And I want to move out of the city.
01:17:50And I know you don't want that stuff.
01:17:52You don't even like that stuff.
01:17:55Actually, and...
01:17:56You don't even really like people who do.
01:18:00Just scary.
01:18:06And I didn't tell you about the engagement because I was afraid you wouldn't be happy for me.
01:18:12And that would just break my heart beyond repair.
01:18:18And I'm so happy about this next chapter of my life, but I'm terrified that you don't want to be
01:18:23a part of it.
01:18:27And I know I really messed up by lying.
01:18:31And I'm really, really sorry.
01:18:35And if things are different now, I understand.
01:18:40And if we end up parting ways, I just wanted to say thank you.
01:18:51Being your best friend has just been the highlight of my life.
01:18:59And I think we're really lucky to have lasted as long as we did.
01:19:24And I was asked to put a couple words together and to try to capture the spirit of marriage.
01:19:30And what it means to our civilization.
01:19:34And particularly what it means to these two very special people.
01:19:38So I've done my best.
01:19:40And I think you'll agree.
01:19:45Love's passion.
01:19:47Always in fashion.
01:19:50French kissing.
01:19:52Sad to be missing.
01:19:55Willows swaying.
01:19:57Children playing.
01:19:59Love will find a way.
01:20:03Today.
01:20:05Forevermore.
01:20:07Into Dawn, Katie, and John.
01:20:13You have truly won.
01:20:17The game.
01:20:31Thank you for that beautiful poem, Henry.
01:20:38Okay.
01:20:40Let's do this.
01:20:43Dearly beloved.
01:20:56Is it so crazy you spend more time with, like, a hairdresser than you do with, like, your best friends?
01:21:03One hundred percent.
01:21:04My eyebrow woman is, is, is closer to me.
01:21:06I text her.
01:21:07We're on texting basis.
01:21:08Yeah.
01:21:09Girl, I got what you desire.
01:21:14Yeah.
01:21:16I got a love key to light your fire.
01:21:21Oh, girl.
01:21:24And if you're about to.
01:21:27It's, like, really fun, just to, like, sleep, right?
01:21:30To be in bed for a full 24 hours.
01:21:34People say that's depression.
01:21:35I say that's a luxury.
01:21:37Exactly.
01:21:38Yeah.
01:21:38A hundred percent.
01:21:38A hundred percent.
01:22:02Kind of depressing.
01:22:05It is.
01:22:06Well, that's, that's, that's, that's what they tell you at school.
01:22:08And you never listen, you know?
01:22:10But, like, you're like, that won't be me.
01:22:23I'm fostering a bass and hound this week.
01:22:27I know.
01:22:27So running around.
01:22:29I need it.
01:22:30I honestly, I cannot even stand it.
01:22:33I need it here.
01:22:36Just say you're for real wide.
01:22:44Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
01:22:52Oh, oh, oh, oh.
01:22:54Something something new.
01:22:57Something something new.
01:22:58Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
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