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00:01On tonight's AFV, the old WOWs start right here and now.
00:07Oh gosh, my hair's...
00:25Welcome to America's Funniest Home Videos.
00:30And now, here he is, the host of our show, Alfonso Ribeiro.
00:39Come on, let's do it.
00:43Come on, come on, I see it, I see it.
00:46Thank you, thank you, thank you.
00:48Hello and welcome.
00:50I am Alfonso and this is AFV, the show that screams family both figuratively and literally.
00:55Figuratively as in, we're all about family and literally as in someone screaming, hey, who drove the car into the
01:01family room?
01:02And you can guarantee the person who did it was a member of that family.
01:06See, see, listen, listen, we're always on theme.
01:10Mm-hmm.
01:13I don't know why anyone might think this wouldn't go well.
01:23I don't even give it away for free.
01:25Mirror, mirror, in the trash can, who's the guy with the really bad trash plant?
01:29There we go.
01:30I don't know what's about to happen.
01:32What I think will happen is I'm going to hit it in the middle and then it should break in
01:36two and maybe fall down inside.
01:37So let's see.
01:43That's not what happened at all.
01:45It actually exploded.
01:48Hmm, is she in the shower?
01:50Not in the shower. Hmm.
01:53Hmm.
01:54I don't know where she could be.
01:56These funny faces are adorable.
02:08This guy's wife is headed out and decides to close the garage door, right on to the hatch of the
02:13SUV he's unloading.
02:21What the fuck is she doing?
02:26Marlin jump.
02:27If the Marlin jump is an annual event, you'd think Marlin would be better at it.
02:39There's a wild bird in the house and it doesn't seem like anyone is quite prepared for it.
02:44There's a bird in here?
02:46Help!
02:48I'm aching!
02:49Help me!
02:50How'd you get in here?
02:52Ah!
02:56Police the hounds.
02:59It's time to go to the dog park.
03:04It's this dog's lucky day.
03:06He found some unguarded cat food on his neighbor's porch.
03:14Or so he thought.
03:19What are you doing?
03:21A room full of goose down.
03:23They ain't down with that.
03:29Main zone!
03:31Why every time...
03:33But every time I'm doing something, you wanna talk.
03:37Are you bored?
03:41I normally don't care for backtalk.
03:43But when it's as funny as this, I don't have a problem with it.
03:47You want me to do it right now?
03:52Are you being a little dramatic?
03:57I think you're kinda spoiled.
04:01He's inside the truck, but he acts like he's riding on the roof.
04:05Got the bridge.
04:20Come on, man.
04:21He's got places to go, squirrels to see.
04:23It's so funny!
04:28That's a hair salon.
04:36That bad boy is a buy-in-bulk red burglar.
04:39Sit him out!
04:43He's like...
04:45He's ashamed of himself.
04:56Kisses?
04:57Kisses?
05:04This pooch is fine with a handshake, but he doesn't want things to go any further.
05:14There's a reason doggy beds are only a few inches off the floor.
05:25Girls.
05:26Hey, girls.
05:27Can you not squish Hardy?
05:28Those two dogs are in a wrestling match, but somehow, Hardy ends up the loser.
05:41We all have the need for speed, and that doesn't change just because you might not have a sports car
05:47or a fighter jet.
05:48So, buckle up, cause I'm feeling greedy for toy vehicles that'll speed.
05:52All fueled up.
05:56I'm igniting.
05:59Like a rocket.
06:02I'm launching.
06:04Out of my way, you'll never catch me.
06:08Oh, you never have a need for speed.
06:10I will rush now, ain't no fancy.
06:14Ooh, yeah, I need for speed.
06:17Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.
06:19I got the need to be for speed.
06:23Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.
06:28I'm in a mad state.
06:32I'm insane.
06:34I simply don't care
06:36For the way to take me, yeah
06:40I don't know where you'll never catch me
06:43Ooh yeah, you'll need for speed
06:46How long shall we go backseat?
06:50Ooh yeah, I need for speed
06:52Oh, hey, I get the need
06:57I need for speed
06:58Oh, hey, oh yeah
07:02I need for speed
07:09Hey, want to see your funny video on TV?
07:12Just upload it to AFV.com
07:14Yeah, I need for speed
07:16Yeah, I need for speed
07:19I need for speed
07:21Yeah, I need for speed
07:25It's been estimated that the average person
07:27makes at least 30,000 decisions a day
07:30which is a lot
07:31So when you see these boneheads
07:33give them a break
07:34because on the day
07:35their boneheadedness was captured on video
07:37they might have only made one bad decision
07:39and 29,999 good ones
07:45It's the last run of the day
07:47Oh my God
07:47And the sled's decision is final
07:56Either those floors are too slippery
07:58or clumsiness just runs in the family
08:14This is why parking garage area rugs
08:17aren't really a thing
08:29It's called a softball
08:30But it's still too hard to throw in the house
08:41Oh, that's smart
08:42You don't want to get mulch all over your driveway
08:53I think he's going to need a bigger tarp
08:55or less manure
08:57Like, a lot less
09:15Working out can yield amazing results
09:18But it usually takes longer than 20 seconds
09:30Tell the difference
09:37Get set for
09:38That's using your noggin
09:39where we show people using their brains
09:41to solve a problem
09:42But don't worry
09:42We won't make it a habit
09:43of showing smart people
09:45This isn't PBS
09:51There's working hard
09:52and then there's working smart
09:54Keep trying
10:01Starts with a spool of rope
10:03and a tire for weight
10:06He invented the lawn Roomba
10:10And a rear drive
10:12self-propelled lawnmower
10:19And voila
10:22Awesome
10:24Come on, Charlie
10:25Forget horsepower
10:26This guy figured out
10:28how to harness baby power
10:29Come on
10:31Yeah
10:32Perfect
10:34He loves showing his mama
10:35how much he loves him
10:39Especially if it makes her drop her lunch
10:47The sign says adults only
10:49It doesn't specify
10:50what species of adults
10:57They just flood inside
11:05They're taking all the cookies
11:07They skipped the bananas
11:08and went straight for the cookies
11:10I think cartoons lied to me
11:12Look at them
11:14The least they could do
11:15is leave a good Yelp review
11:20He lost his phone
11:21but he hasn't given up
11:23on technology just yet
11:31Listen, I'll be right back
11:32Don't touch these
11:34until I come back
11:34Leave them there
11:36It's the temptation challenge
11:38But this kid finds
11:39a clever workaround
11:41I'll be right back
11:42After all, she told him
11:43not to eat these candies
11:44She didn't say anything
11:46about those candies
11:58doing hair by making the girl twirl
12:00Sure, give it a whirl
12:10Mom doesn't want him eating sweets
12:12So she told him
12:13the ice cream truck
12:14is actually the music truck
12:16The music truck
12:17Let's wave at the music truck
12:22Yay, wave at the music truck
12:24Yeah, I'm sure he won't hate her
12:26when he realizes she was lying to him
12:28He'll just take it in stride
12:29No doubt about it
12:36Wind is like bad breath
12:38You can't see it
12:39but you sure know it's there
12:40The difference is that
12:41wind is more destructive
12:42than bad breath
12:43But try telling that
12:45to a guy with an Uber driver
12:46who had tuna for lunch
12:48Storm doors can keep wind
12:50from blowing into your house
12:55But they have their drawbacks
13:04That tent comes with tent spikes
13:06for a reason
13:11Might I suggest keeping your wig
13:13in the closet
13:14and not on the front porch
13:25The catering crew
13:26is setting up for a party
13:27I don't know if this party
13:29is going to raise the roof
13:30but it's certainly going
13:31to raise the canopy
13:43Looks like their outdoor party
13:44is turning into a neighbor's
13:46rooftop party
13:56All she wants to do
13:57is come home
13:58and put her feet up
14:02And technically she does
14:10Are you okay?
14:12Woo woo
14:13Look up here
14:14Baby's first Easter picnic
14:16is a wrap
14:18Hey
14:23If she didn't get this on video
14:25no one would have believed her
14:33The weather is less than picture perfect
14:51You've probably all said to yourselves
14:53at some point
14:54Man, that Alfonso never messes up
14:57How do I do it?
14:58Do I rehearse my lines for hours on end
15:00until they're burned into my brain
15:02making it virtually impossible
15:03for me to make a faux pas?
15:06No
15:08I just have an editor
15:09remove all my mistakes
15:10Plus, he leaves in all the mistakes
15:12the people in the videos make
15:13which makes me look
15:14extra good
15:21Here's why Jedi's rarely train
15:23in the family room
15:33Blowing bubbles is fun in the summer
15:35but it takes on a whole new twist
15:37in the winter
15:55Sometimes you have to tell your kids
15:57no
15:58like when they want to step on the gas pedal
16:18Just because she was recently a baby
16:21doesn't mean she knows how to take care of one
16:28It's not okay
16:29Go pick up your baby
16:34Few people call winter their favorite season
16:42And I'm betting this lady's one of them
16:56He's gone this long without getting on a treadmill
16:58Why start now?
17:06I don't really want to give them a bath
17:09because I don't really think cats necessarily need them
17:13but Toby needs one
17:15so we're going to go do that
17:18Okay
17:18Oh my gosh
17:21I think it's time to throw in the towel
17:23The bath towel that is
17:29He's pulling your shirt off
17:30so that you'll take a bath instead
17:33I want to give you a bath
17:41A celebrity's opinion
17:43is sort of like a guy playing banjo on the subway
17:46Absolutely nobody wants to hear it
17:47Now with that said
17:48check out my opinions
17:50and be glad I don't own a banjo
17:51Bang-a-da-bang-bang-bang-bang-bang-bang-bang-bang-bang-bang-bang-bang
17:55I'm going to give you my two cents
17:56which is about as worthless as two actual cents
18:02My two cents
18:03If you want to improve your cardio
18:05you need to work out for more than one second per day
18:10Oh gosh, my hair isn't
18:16A new year's nugget of knowledge
18:19Not all kids think it's awesome
18:20getting to stay up till midnight
18:23Four, three, two, one
18:33A round ball recommendation
18:35If you find a hoop for 50 cents on Craigslist
18:38there's probably a reason
18:50A potato proposal
18:51If you have trouble cutting your food
18:53you might want to move in with this lady
18:56I'm about to cut the potato
18:58with her katana
19:00Set
19:07Some vehicle advice
19:08You may find that you have more control of your truck
19:11if you're actually in the truck
19:13instead of on an icy driveway next to it
19:24This has been my two cents
19:25You can take that
19:27to the bank
19:32It's time to salute some of the video heroes
19:34who took home lots of zeros
19:36With a digit in front of all those zeros, of course
19:39What I'm saying is
19:40they earned some major bucks
19:43It's time to have a blast
19:45with some big winners from AFB's past
19:49You've got to start from one though
19:50Go all the way, one to ten
19:54Turn to Spanish
19:56Sure, Spanish or Korean
19:57whatever you want
19:57One, two
19:59One, three
20:00One, Spanish
20:01Two, Spanish
20:02Three, Spanish
20:04Four, Spanish
20:05Five, Spanish
20:07Five, Spanish
20:08Five, Spanish
20:08Five, Spanish
20:09Seven, Spanish
20:12Eight, six, Spanish
20:14Nine, Spanish
20:15Nine, Spanish
20:16Ten, Spanish
20:16Yay, high five!
20:18Come on
20:22Come on, you can do it!
20:23Come on, come on
20:24Babe, you can do it
20:25Let's go
20:26Alligator Farm employees seem to have a knack for choosing the perfect, quote, volunteer
20:31Babe, look at me
20:32Babe
20:32Look at me
20:34Babe
20:35No, don't you dare let go
20:37Don't you dare
20:38Okay
20:39You got it
20:40Hey, don't drop them
20:41Don't you dare
20:41Okay
20:44Please don't you dare
20:47Don't you dare
20:48Don't you dare
20:49I'm trusting you
20:50I'm trusting you
20:51I'm gonna bring this on down just a little bit
20:53Oh, but I'm trusting you
20:55No, but I'm trusting you
20:57No, but I'm trusting you
20:57No
20:58No, I'm gonna come to the side and we're gonna take a picture
21:00But you look at the camera
21:01Babe, look, look at me
21:02Look at the camera
21:04Look at the camera
21:05Look at the camera
21:13Look at me
21:24There's a second icon in here
21:26There's a second icon in here
21:26No, that's your case
21:27My sister
21:28Are you kidding me?
21:30What?
21:30I don't know
21:32Watching her big sister get a new cell phone rates about 100 on the Jealousometer
21:36Who's idea was this?
21:42Who's idea was this?
21:44Who's idea was this?
21:45I can't why you upset
21:46Leah's trying to make us
21:48Who's idea was this?
21:50Who's idea was this?
21:51Who's idea was this?
21:53Who's idea was this?
21:55Let's circle back next week for another Inner Circle
22:11Hey, Alfonso!
22:15Hey, Alfonso!
22:16We want to see more copycat videos!
22:26Okay, Nora and Lucille,
22:27you want more copycat videos?
22:29Well, I hope you'll help me celebrate
22:31some people and animals
22:32who were born to imitate.
22:36This copycat is actually a copy dog.
22:45Come on, Rogers!
22:48Come on, tell them!
22:50You gotta make that catch!
22:52You gotta make that catch!
22:55That's what I'm talking about!
22:56That's for all the marbles!
22:58This is what I'm talking about!
23:01This is for all the marbles!
23:03Come on!
23:04Come on!
23:06Let's go!
23:07Let's go!
23:10Do that again.
23:16I think the kangaroo's asking you
23:18what's in your pouch.
23:39Grandpa knows how to skip.
23:41Let's see if Grandma has what it takes.
23:43I'm here, girl.
23:44Look at this!
23:45Now, you're gonna video me, right?
23:47Yeah.
23:47What does this shirt say?
23:49I'm that grandma.
23:49Sorry, not sorry.
23:51That's right.
23:55Her shirt says,
23:56I'm that grandma.
23:57But I think that grandma should skip that skipping.
24:00What are you doing with her arm?
24:04Oh, cut!
24:05Super fans over there, over here!
24:08Get up, get up!
24:10Let's hear you cheer!
24:12Red!
24:13White!
24:15Red!
24:16Red!
24:18Red!
24:19Red!
24:21Red!
24:22Red!
24:22Red!
24:22Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up, get up, come here, you cheer!
24:26Alright, we are just having a great day at the beach.
24:30Walter,
24:32Kathy,
24:34Lizzie,
24:37Mirabur,
24:40over,
24:42and
24:44this guy.
24:51a little while ago we visited the winner's circle here are some videos hoping to join that club
24:56i guess you could say they're hanging out outside the club behind the velvet rope which would make
25:01me the bouncer okay people one line one line step back from the rope and keep that sidewall clear
25:11one little ray of sunshine poking through the tree shining down on one no myelin no
25:22this guy shouldn't worry he's just standing directly underneath 20 pounds of pink insulation
25:27that's been sitting in a damp attic for 20 years
25:37is it good that ice cream is cold not as cold as the look he gives his dad don't make
25:43a mess
25:45don't make a mess
25:49nah nah nah nah don't make a mess who you think you're looking at like that
26:03there has to be a story behind why she put that on her forehead
26:10and it's probably too long to fit on a post-it
26:21the kid's learning to hit the guy behind him is learning where not to stand
26:36college is now so expensive that some parents start saving for it the minute their baby is born
26:41but there's an easier solution just start recording everything your kid says the moment they start
26:46talking they might say something funny enough to end up on afe and win 20 grand which should cover
26:51maybe around uh like two weeks of college
26:57what are you doing
27:02i don't think you're gonna float up in the i think you're too heavy
27:19put your hands up
27:22all right put them back down what is it called again
27:25a crotch top shirt
27:27it's called a crop top
27:30crotch top
27:32no it's crop
27:36i'll make sure no that does not match
27:39that's too much that's too many stripes
27:42mom
27:43buddy
27:44it's america
27:51puppy in the car
27:53i'll play it for
27:56oh my god
27:57i'm so sorry
28:06it's a boy
28:11what does it mean
28:14maximus
28:15i got my blue baby
28:19tell me what hurts
28:23mine
28:24okay and what do you need to make it feel better
28:27bacon
28:29don't touch my spot
28:34i know that smile
28:44dad
28:46i know that smile
28:48dad
28:49i know that smile
28:51you're gonna touch mom's butt
28:54i know that smile
28:56i know that smile
28:58i have no idea what you're talking about
29:03don't play dumb with me
29:13it's time to enjoy the great outdoors
29:15in the best way possible
29:16from the comfort of your couch
29:18we even cut it to a catchy classical tango
29:20which is a nicer thing to hear in the great outdoors
29:23than your husband yelling
29:24hey
29:24hey
29:25i need more wieners on the grill
29:33oh my god
29:42oh my god
29:44oh my god
30:04i have no idea what you're talking about
30:20i have no idea what you're talking about
30:25i have no idea what you're talking about
30:25i have no idea what you're talking about
30:25i have no idea what you're talking about
30:34do you have a funny video worth $20,000 what are you waiting for upload it to afv.com
30:48we live in a world where everybody is so distracted they can't concentrate on what
30:53they're doing but even in a package full of people who can't focus at least the videos are in focus
31:00he's teaching the kids to keep their eye on the ball but he should remember to keep an eye on
31:05the
31:05koi pond what are you doing with that log that boy's bringing his daddy a big love
31:18but daddy's other son calls over to him at the most inopportune time
31:29the family's headed out for a trip to the mall
31:36the baby's no longer in that stroller but grandma doesn't know that
31:48starting a fire by rubbing two sticks together that'll take forever
31:53or however long it takes him to turn his back
32:04he almost completes an entire errand without looking at his phone
32:19he asked her to secretly film his marriage proposal
32:24but in her defense raccoons are really cute
32:33and she missed it
32:41you know what the world needs now a kid who's got this easter thing figure it out
33:09some shows try so hard to be clever
33:12and they go right over everyone's head but not afv our humor is intended to smack you right in the
33:18head so you're not only laughing at the people in the videos you feel like them too like ow what
33:23was
33:23that ow
33:35this is how we do meetings these days
33:39i guess dad's jeans are too tight for this maneuver
33:55that girl's braver than indiana jones
33:59heck she's braver than pretty much everyone i know
34:10a crowbar turns into an oh no bar
34:15let's go
34:30i don't know if he grew the hedges this tall for looks
34:37oh
34:38or to cushion his falls
34:41what did he do
34:43i want to roll off the window but his head's in there
34:46no don't roll
34:46he's getting stuff everywhere
34:48dad said don't roll off the window
34:50and that's the last time nathan will ever listen to him
34:53oh he's coming
35:08i don't know about this now you know how he got the nickname
35:21crit face mcgee
35:29he doesn't just go through to defense
35:38hey two points is two points
35:56we live in a world full of distractions
36:00hey hey are you paying attention or just doom scrolling on your phone
36:03well be careful or you could end up in a distracted package like the one we showed earlier
36:08which wouldn't be so bad since distracted is actually tonight's assignment america we want
36:13funny videos almost too funny to mention due to people simply not paying attention jess
36:18do you know someone whose life has been impacted due to the fact that they're easily distracted
36:22did they trip over a rug looking at a bug or get beamed while staring at a screen well send
36:27the
36:28video our way it could win you 20 or even 100 grand upload the video to afv.com for full
36:33contest
36:33rules log on to afv.com all i'm asking is for people bad at multitasking
36:45well the show's almost over but we're not quite done i hope you'll stick around to find out who
36:51won let's meet our finalists first up her lack of awareness is truly bizarre
36:55causing her husband to get eaten by his car it's double door ding dong sent in by kevin sullivan
37:01from peel up washington this guy's wife is headed out and decides to close the garage door
37:08right on to the hatch of the suv he's unloading
37:22joining us are kevin and nancy so kevin what was going through your mind as the garage door closed
37:29the car hatch on you i couldn't believe she couldn't see me and i was worried she's gonna scratch up
37:35the
37:35back of my car well i'm pretty sure it did maybe leave a little scratch here and there now nancy
37:40i
37:40heard that you didn't even want the security camera now what do you think about your purchase now
37:46it was well worth the investment well we love that see it all worked out good luck all right thanks
37:55next up most dogs enjoy a really long walk but this pooch prefers a really long talk it's the hound
38:02of sound sent in by jolene moyer from friendship wisconsin why every time but every time i'm doing
38:11something you want to talk are you bored are you being a little dramatic
38:21joining us are jolene greg and duke now jolene duke actually sounded like he was responding to your
38:28questions is this unusual he does he's always done his whole life he's five now and if he'll if you
38:37talk to him he'll talk back usually okay all right now are there any special things that duke can say
38:44he says mama and he says i love you you know what i can say good luck thank you all
38:53right
38:54finally it can take a long time getting ripped at the gym but for this kid it's quick at least
39:00according to him it's getting fit in the flash sent in by chelsea eisenhower from walk georgia
39:15working out can yield amazing results but it usually takes longer than 20 seconds
39:26it's all the difference joining us are chelsea mark and joseph now chelsea joseph clearly has quite
39:34a good sense of humor i'm guessing he makes you laugh quite often all the time every day oh i
39:41love it
39:42now joseph i understand that you film a lot of things what would you like to do with these videos
39:45one
39:47day me youtube maybe youtube well you know you've got the perfect first clip when you make your own
39:53channel okay okay all right all right good luck y'all all right we're gonna find out who takes home
40:02the
40:02cash in just a minute but first let's take a look at some of the clips that didn't make our
40:05top three
40:05in tonight's honorable mention
40:08so
40:44okay it's time to hand out tonight's prize the 20 000 for first 6 000 for second and 4 000
40:49for
40:49third here we go our third place four thousand dollar winner is getting fit in a flash sent in
40:55by chelsea eisenhower from mock georgia thank you and the winner of the 20 000 and tonight's funniest
41:05whole video is the hound of sound sent in by jolene moyer from friendship wisconsin jolene greg and duke
41:13yes congratulations is there anything special you're going to do for duke now that he's won you all this
41:22money we are going to go on vacation take him where we can let him run oh i love that
41:31and you know what
41:31now if duke doesn't like the way you spend the 20 grand i'm pretty sure he's gonna let you know
41:37oh yeah he's gonna let us know he's talking to us right now oh i love it i love well
41:42congratulations
41:43you got 20 000 and a shot at a hundred thousand dollars thank you thank you all right well that's
41:53our show i'd love to stick around but we rented out the studio for a high school dance and i
41:58don't
41:59want to get roped into being a chaperone again we'll see you next time but don't forget if you upload
42:05a video and it airs on the show we'll send you an afb t-shirt so good night everybody remember
42:09send
42:09your video to me you might win 20 g's good night y'all
42:14so
42:47you
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