- 13 hours ago
The Miniature Wife S01E01-2 (2026)
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TVTranscript
00:00:05¡Suscríbete al canal!
00:00:31No, no.
00:00:34It's not a metaphor.
00:00:36He made me six inches tall.
00:00:40I'm literally the size of a dry martini, shaken, stirred, and nursing the burn of every sip.
00:00:50Even at our ugliest, I still believe our love's worth fighting for.
00:00:57But fair warning.
00:01:00It's going to get worse before it gets better.
00:01:05To us.
00:01:06To us.
00:01:13To recapturing magic.
00:01:15To the journey, not the destination.
00:01:18And to Dr. Carmichael, couples therapist extraordinaire.
00:01:21To her words of wisdom.
00:01:25Speaking of the journey.
00:01:27It was bumpy.
00:01:29Yeah, a few potholes.
00:01:31Yeah.
00:01:31Yeah.
00:01:32Checked into separate rooms.
00:01:33Um, but I am working through my narcissistic tendencies.
00:01:38And I am working on my accountability issues.
00:01:41And here we are.
00:01:43We made it.
00:01:44Got to the next stop.
00:01:46Dr. Carmichael's new year, new us, colon.
00:01:49A grand gesture.
00:01:51I'd like to go first.
00:01:52Okay, great.
00:01:53All right.
00:02:02I've arranged to get the Vermont gang back together at the Grey House on New Year's Eve for our anniversary.
00:02:07So we can renew our vows.
00:02:10New year.
00:02:12New us.
00:02:14I'm speechless.
00:02:16We were so happy there.
00:02:20Really?
00:02:21Really.
00:02:21Are Gary and Meg going to be there?
00:02:23They're giving up Cabo.
00:02:24Lulu?
00:02:25Our daughter has not returned my calls.
00:02:27Oh, she's 18.
00:02:28She will.
00:02:28They don't do phones.
00:02:29Always send a text.
00:02:30Okay.
00:02:30Okay.
00:02:31My turn.
00:02:32Okay.
00:02:34This will be the last Christmas that we spend in St. Louis.
00:02:38Because I have listed our house with the contingency to run it back from the bio through next December.
00:02:43I am going to land this big fish.
00:02:46And tomorrow, I'm going to get Elv Smith to bankroll the final stage of my life's work.
00:02:50So that in one year, Lindy, we can move back to the Grey House permanently.
00:02:56Like I promised years ago.
00:02:58A clean slate.
00:02:59And a fresh start.
00:03:01I supported you.
00:03:02And you got your prize.
00:03:04And all I ask is that for one more year, you support me so I can get mine.
00:03:10Are you serious?
00:03:13The listing went up.
00:03:15Today.
00:03:19Is this real?
00:03:21Very.
00:03:26Plus.
00:03:29I love you.
00:03:31I love you.
00:03:33I love you.
00:03:33I love you too.
00:03:42Thank you.
00:03:43Thank you for inviting me back into our bed.
00:04:09How does one solve?
00:04:10The problem of feeding the world.
00:04:14Only less little John knows.
00:04:17Now what if we could take, say, an ear of corn and shrink it to a fraction of its original
00:04:23size?
00:04:24Just imagine.
00:04:25A farmer could grow ten, a hundred, a thousand ears of corn in the space it takes to grow one.
00:04:32But how does cellular reduction work?
00:04:36My revolutionary molecular transformation process fundamentally changes the distance between atoms.
00:04:42Oh, the real question is, can you restore the corncob to regular size after it's been miniaturized?
00:04:48Not only can we do it, we will do it.
00:04:51Together, Hilton Smith.
00:04:53We can make more with less.
00:04:55And that's L-E-S.
00:04:59I'll take it from here, Les.
00:05:01Okay.
00:05:05Now it's time to blow your minds.
00:05:12We call this the mini barn cart.
00:05:16No one calls it that.
00:05:16Okay, it's just me.
00:05:18See, I grew up on a farm.
00:05:19Richard, I'm sorry.
00:05:20I'm getting excited.
00:05:46We call this the future.
00:06:03I am fucking amazed.
00:06:08It's a corn.
00:06:09It's a truck.
00:06:10Look how tiny it is.
00:06:11It's being tiny.
00:06:12It's incredible.
00:06:13I got you.
00:06:14You did.
00:06:15You really did.
00:06:15You really did.
00:06:16That's crazy.
00:06:18Amaze me again.
00:06:19Make it big.
00:06:20I want to taste it.
00:06:23Oh, a big corn takes a big investment.
00:06:25Oh, there he is.
00:06:26Money man chiming in.
00:06:28Go on.
00:06:28You know, Flavor Saver was a huge step forward.
00:06:33It was the first and the best GMO tomato on the market.
00:06:37But it was a failure.
00:06:38Well, no, it wasn't.
00:06:41It was a breakthrough, but it tasted like old band-aids.
00:06:44Admit it.
00:06:45No, I don't think I will.
00:06:48Admit it or I walk.
00:06:50No.
00:06:55Fuck yeah!
00:06:56You should never admit failure.
00:06:58I got you.
00:06:59Yes, you did, Hilton.
00:07:01But this agrotech is going to change the world.
00:07:05Jinx?
00:07:06And just think, this is only the beginning.
00:07:08Sorry, who are you?
00:07:09Vivian, Hilton's chief scientist.
00:07:11I'm the guts.
00:07:12I just write the checks.
00:07:13She's...
00:07:14The brains.
00:07:14And my guts never make mistakes.
00:07:17I mean, I would write you a check right now.
00:07:21But for some reason, I'm just not feeling yummy in my tummy.
00:07:29Who are you?
00:07:30Me?
00:07:31Who are you?
00:07:33Is this a trick question?
00:07:34I don't know.
00:07:35Is it?
00:07:36Well, who are you?
00:07:38I'm awesome.
00:07:39I'm Hilton.
00:07:40Well, I'm awesome.
00:07:41I'm less.
00:07:44Yeah, I'm going to need more.
00:07:53You'll like it.
00:07:55Yeah, I'm going to lose my house.
00:08:19I'm going to lose my house.
00:08:26Pulitzer Prize winning novel.
00:08:27By the one, the only, Lindy McMichael Littlejohn.
00:08:32That's a lifetime ago.
00:08:35Uh-uh.
00:08:35Eighteen years and still a fan fave?
00:08:37Listen, Richie.
00:08:39Um, we need to talk.
00:08:42Uh-oh.
00:08:43No.
00:08:44Yeah.
00:08:45No, we've just begun.
00:08:47Richie.
00:08:48Hold on.
00:08:48This is just the first act.
00:08:50Not turn this into a tragedy.
00:08:52Tragedy's a better story.
00:08:54Oh, I wish they had a section on how to repair an emotional affair.
00:08:59Listen, you really saw me when I needed it the most.
00:09:03I did.
00:09:04Yeah, and you really gave me that emotional intimacy that I craved, you know?
00:09:10Mm-hmm.
00:09:11You were a great shoulder, an ear.
00:09:14Mm-hmm.
00:09:14You're so handsome, young, smart.
00:09:18No, stop it.
00:09:19And maybe in another life, but...
00:09:21But I fell in love.
00:09:24And you?
00:09:26I fell in Les.
00:09:27Hell yes.
00:09:28Yeah.
00:09:28Why?
00:09:30Les knows the real me, the worst of me, and he still loves me.
00:09:36I could love the worst to you.
00:09:37No.
00:09:38Yeah.
00:09:38He has 20 years on you, and you've known me, like, a few months.
00:09:41Six and a half.
00:09:43Les?
00:09:45He made a grand gesture, and he promised me a fresh start, and I believe him.
00:09:51Why?
00:09:52No, no, no, actually, don't say.
00:09:54Love should remain a mystery.
00:09:58My mom told me that.
00:10:00Okay.
00:10:01I'm gonna go.
00:10:01Just, just, wait, wait, wait, this...
00:10:04Oh, God, no, no, no.
00:10:04I got you this Christmas present.
00:10:06Absolutely cannot accept this.
00:10:08You must, or it means our love was in vain.
00:10:10Shh, shh, shh, not love.
00:10:11Okay, okay, okay, okay.
00:10:12Okay, just open the card first.
00:10:14There is no need to thank me.
00:10:16Okay?
00:10:17Okay.
00:10:31Merry Christmas, my love.
00:10:34In anticipation of the new year, new you, and new us, I thought this would be a great start.
00:10:39Open the present.
00:10:41I'll wait.
00:10:52I hate this rag.
00:10:53I know you hate this rag, but I knew you'd never send it in yourself.
00:10:58Give it a quick read.
00:10:59See if you recognize it.
00:11:02Oh, Richie.
00:11:04No, no, no, no.
00:11:05What have you done?
00:11:06I presented to be your book agent.
00:11:08Your story is gonna be in the New Yorker.
00:11:12No.
00:11:13I didn't write this.
00:11:15I'm fucked.
00:11:16I know it's overwhelming, and I'm sure you don't.
00:11:19Oh, fuck, Richie!
00:11:22No, no, no!
00:11:23Oh, my fuck.
00:11:25Oh, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.
00:11:27Oh, bitch, pick up, pick up.
00:11:28Hi, this is Terry.
00:11:29Leave a message.
00:11:30Terry!
00:11:31Oh, fuck.
00:11:32Okay.
00:11:32There is a story.
00:11:34There's a story in New Yorker with my name on it, and I need you to call me back.
00:11:38This is an emergency.
00:11:39For serious this time, call me back.
00:11:42Oh, fuck.
00:11:44Fuck!
00:11:45Fuck!
00:11:45Fuck!
00:11:48Fuck!
00:11:48Fuck!
00:11:49Fuck!
00:11:51Fuck!
00:11:53Shut the door.
00:11:55Why?
00:11:55Because I want to raise my voice.
00:11:58Jesus jumping crackers!
00:12:00Why would you invite Hilton to your charity event at your home tonight?
00:12:05Because he wants to know who I am.
00:12:06But Lindy will be there.
00:12:08And?
00:12:08I'm sorry.
00:12:09Am I the only one that remembers last year?
00:12:11The silent auction?
00:12:13The pool incident?
00:12:14And you're still serving alcohol this year, right?
00:12:16Count me out.
00:12:17I'm sorry.
00:12:18I cannot watch.
00:12:21I don't think that my heart or my stomach can tolerate another interaction with him, but
00:12:27we are broke.
00:12:29And here's all we have.
00:12:31There are no more interested investors less with Hilton's kind of cash.
00:12:36You know what?
00:12:37Lindy and I are fine now.
00:12:38We're good, even.
00:12:39And we're renewing our vows.
00:12:41New year.
00:12:42New us!
00:12:43Yes!
00:12:43You said that last year.
00:12:44This year it's going to stick.
00:12:45You sleeping in the same bed?
00:12:46Yes.
00:12:47Just sleeping?
00:12:48Sleeping plus.
00:12:50Big plus?
00:12:51Small plus.
00:12:52It feels so much better if it was big.
00:12:54We're on the road to big.
00:12:55I promise you.
00:12:56Um, okay.
00:12:58Lindy, it's me.
00:12:59It's me calling you.
00:13:00Um, I'm not panicking, but just call me back before the party, okay?
00:13:04It's not an emergency, but it's an emergency.
00:13:06Oh, oh, oh.
00:13:07So sorry, sir.
00:13:07Um, my, uh, my polyp is gone.
00:13:10Yeah, but there's a hole in my heart now.
00:13:12Sounds like a case for the Bard's Guard.
00:13:14So I'll be unable to attend your party this evening.
00:13:17Our loss.
00:13:17Good luck, Richard.
00:13:42You're not Jackie.
00:13:43I'm Hill.
00:13:44Don't make me raise it.
00:13:45Who are you?
00:13:46I'm Professor Littlejohn.
00:13:47Jackie's professor.
00:13:48Did she leave for break already?
00:13:50Have I missed her?
00:13:50I hope not, because I'm her fucking ride.
00:13:53Jackie!
00:13:54Professor Littlejohn.
00:13:55Yeah, Lindy.
00:13:56You should call me Lindy.
00:13:57Oh, uh, hell, uh, Professor Littlejohn is the reason that I'm here.
00:14:02Oh, you wrote that book she loves.
00:14:04I didn't read it.
00:14:05No offense.
00:14:06None taken.
00:14:07Jackie, I'm so glad I caught you.
00:14:09Can we talk?
00:14:10Yeah.
00:14:11Just real quick.
00:14:12Oh, you mean without me?
00:14:13I do.
00:14:14Oh.
00:14:14Is it okay?
00:14:15Oh, yeah.
00:14:15Is it rude?
00:14:16No offense, but...
00:14:17Sure.
00:14:18Okay.
00:14:18Let's just have her...
00:14:20Okay.
00:14:21Um...
00:14:23Have I done something wrong, Professor Littlejohn?
00:14:25Oh, no, no.
00:14:26Gosh, no.
00:14:27No, I have.
00:14:28I have.
00:14:30I, um...
00:14:31I need to tell you something.
00:14:34Uh...
00:14:37I loved your short story.
00:14:41Untitled on purpose.
00:14:42That's the one.
00:14:43Yeah, I loved it.
00:14:44It was brilliant.
00:14:45Uh, the prose was incisive.
00:14:47Oh, just the voice.
00:14:49Fresh.
00:14:49Distinguished.
00:14:50Rare.
00:14:51One that deserves the attention of the New York literati.
00:14:57I mean, that means the world to me.
00:15:00Professor Littlejohn, it's almost Christmas and you're at my door complimenting my work.
00:15:04I, oh my gosh, I couldn't ask for a better guess.
00:15:05Okay, listen to me.
00:15:06Listen to me.
00:15:07Yes?
00:15:07You need to turn it into a novel right now.
00:15:12Now?
00:15:13Really?
00:15:14Really now.
00:15:15Mm-hmm.
00:15:15Um, I guess I could get started over the break.
00:15:19No, you need to take next semester off and just write.
00:15:21The whole semester.
00:15:24The whole semester.
00:15:24You just want to isolate and write while it's fresh, while it's here, while Untitled on Purpose
00:15:30is coursing through you, right?
00:15:33Yes, I feel it.
00:15:33Okay, so you need to isolate and write.
00:15:35Uh, no distractions, no internet, no novels, no magazines, no, uh, nothing.
00:15:41Right?
00:15:41Nothing.
00:15:42And just all winter long, a very room of one's own.
00:15:45Right.
00:15:45Wolf it.
00:15:46Right, wolf it.
00:15:47Could you do that?
00:15:48Yes, well, uh, well, how's dad?
00:15:50My Uncle Flip, he has a cabin back in Montana that's super isolated.
00:15:54Ah!
00:15:54Walden Pond isolated.
00:15:55That's perfect.
00:15:56Right?
00:15:56Yes, Jackie.
00:15:57Yeah.
00:15:59This has the potential to be your...
00:16:02My rainbow starts with black?
00:16:03Jack, no, Professor Littlejohn, it, it couldn't.
00:16:08Jackie, I should know.
00:16:10My goal in life is to just write one, one great novel like you.
00:16:16That's okay.
00:16:17So we're agreed.
00:16:19You're going to isolate and write.
00:16:20Yes.
00:16:20All semester.
00:16:21All semester.
00:16:22You're going to Montana.
00:16:23Yes, Professor Littlejohn.
00:16:24Remember, no magazines, right?
00:16:25You don't want any?
00:16:27Uh-uh.
00:16:27Just turn off the internet, okay?
00:16:29I will unplug completely.
00:16:31Yes!
00:16:32Okay, hey, Merry Christmas.
00:16:34Merry Christmas to you, too.
00:16:40Okay.
00:16:41Thanks for that.
00:16:44Let's sit right here.
00:16:46Let's sit right here.
00:16:48Let's sit right here.
00:16:50Oh.
00:16:51Oh.
00:16:51Oh.
00:16:52Oh.
00:16:53Oh.
00:16:54Oh.
00:17:00Terry, thank Christ.
00:17:02Okay, listen, I...
00:17:03Video 10 minutes.
00:17:05Blindsiding me with one short story published in the New Yorker over the last two decades
00:17:09gets you one.
00:17:09The fact that we've been friends for more than 20 years gets you another.
00:17:12And the other eight belong to Gillian Flynn.
00:17:14He continues to publish bestsellers, which bought me a classic six off the park.
00:17:19I didn't write the story.
00:17:20It's my students' work.
00:17:24My ex-emotional lover, long story.
00:17:28Found the fucking story in my bag and thought it was mine, and I...
00:17:31Why would I correct him, you know?
00:17:33He sent it in without my knowledge on my behalf because he, long story, adored me and...
00:17:40Thought I was capable of writing something great again.
00:17:42I'm taking a sabbatical from Wash U.
00:17:45I'm headed to the Grey House.
00:17:46Les and I are going to renew our vows.
00:17:48Long story, you're invited.
00:17:50I know you hate him.
00:17:51I did too, but he has a good dad.
00:17:54And I'm committed to committing to my marriage.
00:17:57So, I cannot handle...
00:18:00This shitstorm right now, which is sure, by the way, to tarnish your reputation as well.
00:18:05So if you want to keep that classic six...
00:18:08Then can you please, please...
00:18:10Fix this fucking mess so I can focus on my vows and my marriage like I promised?
00:18:15I hate you.
00:18:17I know.
00:18:18I hate me too.
00:18:20Thank you.
00:18:21No, you're not allowed to thank me.
00:18:28Oliver!
00:18:47¡Less has been calling, I've been texting!
00:18:49And I have been busy.
00:18:50Les needs you on Best Behavior tonight.
00:18:53Hilton Smith is attending.
00:18:55Condescending as always, Starla.
00:18:57And who?
00:18:58Necessary, and he is a big investor.
00:19:01You know, I thought the cover was on the pool last year, right?
00:19:03You know that.
00:19:04Great!
00:19:05You already picked up the first frame to me.
00:19:06I did.
00:19:06Yep.
00:19:07It's locked.
00:19:08I know.
00:19:10Is this another party protest?
00:19:11No.
00:19:12Hilton is here in five.
00:19:13Starla.
00:19:14Your dress is upstairs.
00:19:15I need you inside.
00:19:15Now.
00:19:16What dress?
00:19:17Les, let me assess your wardrobe situation.
00:19:19And we both agreed that the only option was to outsource an upgrade.
00:19:22Insulting.
00:19:24And what if I hate it?
00:19:25Your futures are on the line.
00:19:27He said to me, quote,
00:19:29No new year, new us without new money.
00:19:31Unquote.
00:19:32So please, just move.
00:19:34Get out of the car.
00:19:36Now!
00:19:37Goodbye, Starla.
00:19:38I will have the valet physically remove you.
00:19:43I need a minute!
00:19:46One minute!
00:19:49You need a Hulk out front?
00:19:51Stat.
00:20:19Come on.
00:20:20Tell me what Les is working on.
00:20:21Esto es la cover de Scientific American.
00:20:24No me dice nada.
00:20:26Y nunca pregunté.
00:20:28Pues, shit, Lenny.
00:20:30He he leído de ese quote ten veces en los años.
00:20:32All I'll say es First World Fight Club.
00:20:35Len, y un día.
00:20:37Just como Scientific American.
00:20:49Vodka dry.
00:20:58Oh, gracias
00:21:07Big Red has landed
00:21:10Where's Lindy?
00:21:11I need eyes on Lady Tornado
00:21:12Give me a 20 on Deep Pockets
00:21:16Double negative
00:21:16Big Red is not happy
00:21:18I know amazing style when I see it
00:21:22This is a facade
00:21:23Oh, well, the facade is working
00:21:27I'm teetering on the precipice of being outed as a fraud
00:21:32Which I probably deserve
00:21:34I'm supposed to be the supportive wife
00:21:38But my career going up in flames is banging around my brain
00:21:42That's all I can hear
00:21:44What does your husband think about that?
00:21:45Oh, he has no clue
00:21:47He's a fraud, too
00:21:49Is that so?
00:21:52Welcome, everyone
00:21:55Every year I say I'm going to keep it short
00:21:58And that this night is not about me
00:22:00It's about the children
00:22:02And tonight I'm actually going to keep that promise
00:22:04But, you know, let's be honest
00:22:06It has to be about me first
00:22:08Because you're all here to bid on my stuff
00:22:11Well, he's just playing the role of a charitable philanthropist
00:22:17But all he really cares about is his life's work
00:22:20First, himself second, our daughter third, and me last
00:22:24Which I probably deserve
00:22:25Well, just curious
00:22:27What do you think about his life's work?
00:22:30And a very personal little ditty about Jack and Diane
00:22:34My John Cougar Mellencamp Velcro wallet
00:22:37With my high school ID still inside
00:22:40Huh?
00:22:41Where else are you going to get one of those?
00:22:43I can't tell you that
00:22:46It's so top secret, actually
00:22:48I have no idea what it is
00:22:49Oh
00:22:50Hold on a second
00:22:50My top elf is really trying to tell me something
00:22:53Maybe tomato on the brand
00:22:55I'm going to let Deepak his two drinks
00:22:56And third on deck
00:22:57You're fucking joking
00:22:58You're fucking fired
00:22:59I'll turn on my headset
00:23:02But I can tell you
00:23:06He's brilliant
00:23:08Don't tell him I said that
00:23:10Yeah
00:23:11I mean, I'm already last
00:23:12You know, what's after last?
00:23:16Not much
00:23:17So, yeah
00:23:18Merry Christmas and happy holidays
00:23:21And hopefully that covers it all
00:23:24Okay
00:23:26Less five minutes
00:23:27No, two, one
00:23:28Later, maybe
00:23:29Done
00:23:29Oh, everybody was up
00:23:31Stop, stop, stop
00:23:32I'm just explaining to this gentleman
00:23:34Why there's no outdoor access this holiday season
00:23:36So, as a joke, last year
00:23:38I put into the silent auction
00:23:40As a joke
00:23:41Watch Almighty Les
00:23:42Walk on water
00:23:44I thought the cover was on the pool
00:23:46Oh
00:23:46I'm so sorry
00:23:48You get it
00:23:49Hilton, I'm so sorry
00:23:50I just want to say I'm so sorry
00:23:51Well, I pay right now to see that
00:23:53Awesome Les
00:23:54If you can walk on water
00:23:56You got my money
00:23:58Are you being serious?
00:24:00No
00:24:00No
00:24:01Oh, great
00:24:02So I can still get the money?
00:24:04After the conversation with your wife
00:24:08I don't know
00:24:09Hi, Hilton, I didn't know
00:24:10Okay, lady, why don't you just not say anything
00:24:12And maybe go and get us a lot of drinks?
00:24:16Okay, so Hilton, I don't know what she said
00:24:18Well, she said that you put work first, family third, and her dead last
00:24:22That's out of context
00:24:24What kind of man are you?
00:24:25I know, I just, I can't explain
00:24:27I can't explain
00:24:31You never explain anything
00:24:33I got you
00:24:34Again
00:24:35Again
00:24:36You suck at me
00:24:37I do, I do, I do
00:24:38So just to be clear
00:24:39Lindy didn't tank the deal
00:24:40She closed it
00:24:42Now she's awesome
00:24:44Workaholics, they changed the world
00:24:46I'm a workaholic
00:24:47I should know
00:24:48Thank you
00:24:49Thank you so much
00:24:50Thank you so much
00:24:51I want to go to work right away
00:24:52Like, fuck the holidays
00:24:53Yeah
00:24:53Put on my Christmas card every year
00:24:55Yeah, you really see me
00:24:57We both do
00:24:57Oh, it's you again
00:24:58Hilton's chief scientist
00:25:00Oh, the brains
00:25:01And the boots
00:25:02The boots?
00:25:03The boots on the ground
00:25:04What do the boots do?
00:25:05The boots ensure that my guts are never wrong
00:25:09The boots are part of the deal
00:25:12I'm all in
00:25:12Are you?
00:25:14Awesome
00:25:14Les
00:25:21Fine, just, just tell me
00:25:23I'm melting down
00:25:25Because I fucked the deal
00:25:26No, I closed the deal
00:25:27I closed the deal
00:25:28Fantastic
00:25:29No
00:25:29What do you mean no?
00:25:31That's so great
00:25:32Oh my god, I was so worried
00:25:33No, no
00:25:34Now I am saddled with one of Hilton's network of bio spies
00:25:38His chief scientist is going to come in
00:25:40And she's going to take credit for my work
00:25:42And all of this will have been for nothing
00:25:43I will be nothing
00:25:45My legacy will be nothing
00:25:47I shall go to the grave without a Nobel
00:25:49You know, this was my last chance at greatness
00:25:52God
00:25:54Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey
00:25:59Come on, you remember Joan Ryan?
00:26:03Huh?
00:26:04Yeah, my nemesis at MIT
00:26:06That's right
00:26:07You were convinced that the PhD board was going to pick her over you
00:26:12And you were going to be relegated to just a footnote in the science community
00:26:16Or some other science bad thing, right?
00:26:18But what actually happened, Les?
00:26:21They chose me
00:26:23They chose you
00:26:25And where's Joan Ryan?
00:26:27Teaching at Berkeley
00:26:28And where are you?
00:26:32In St. Louis
00:26:33But why?
00:26:34Oh, uh
00:26:36To give the finger to those ungrateful pricks at Monsanto
00:26:39And to build the Menlo Park of the Midwest
00:26:42And how?
00:26:43How?
00:26:43Because I am a partner in my own company
00:26:45Creating the bio-agrotech that will change the world
00:26:48That's right
00:26:48Yeah
00:26:48You're going to change the world
00:26:52And you are
00:26:54I've always believed that
00:26:56Even when you hated me?
00:26:57Oh
00:27:00Especially when I hated you
00:27:02So what do I do?
00:27:04You do what you always do
00:27:06You get back in the workshop
00:27:09And you figure it out
00:27:11That's what Les Littlejohn does
00:27:13Yeah
00:27:14Right?
00:27:15Yeah
00:27:15Right
00:27:16Okay
00:27:18Okay
00:27:20That's it
00:27:21That's it
00:27:22Thank you, Lydia
00:27:23Thank you for being so
00:27:25Understanding
00:27:29So now I've got to get back in the workshop
00:27:31And let's move our renewing our vows to next year
00:27:34That's a fantastic idea
00:27:35Les, no, I didn't
00:27:36What?
00:27:37Huh?
00:27:37That's what you said, right?
00:27:39Huh?
00:27:40Did I?
00:27:41Yeah
00:27:42Gary and Meg
00:27:43Oh, Gary and Meg would much prefer to go to Cabo
00:27:45Let's send them something
00:27:46Sign my name
00:27:46No, no, no
00:27:47That will be so humiliating
00:27:48Don't worry, don't worry
00:27:49I'll tell Lulu that she can just go skiing with her friends
00:27:51Like she wanted
00:27:51So I'll see you when I see you
00:27:53I'll be back when I'm back
00:27:54And I love you
00:27:55And I can't wait for new year
00:27:57New us
00:27:57Next year
00:27:58Mwah
00:28:08Is he fucking kidding me?
00:28:13Why?
00:28:28Lindy?
00:28:29Hi, Richie
00:28:30Um
00:28:33I made a mistake and I'm leaving Les
00:28:36Tonight
00:28:37I hear the emotion in your voice
00:28:39And it's beautiful
00:28:40I've been hoping for a Christmas miracle
00:28:42Yeah, I'm going to go to Vermont
00:28:43I'm going to go to the Grey House
00:28:45And I, um
00:28:46Could you, could you come with me?
00:28:48Where you finished your masterpiece
00:28:50I'd be honored to be invited
00:28:52A gift beyond measure
00:28:53I have ten vacation days
00:28:55And one personal day bag
00:28:57Heart emoji
00:28:59Let's meet at Mandy's diner at midnight
00:29:01Heart emoji bag
00:29:03I'll arrive with joy in my step
00:29:05And a light in my heart
00:29:06Did you love my present?
00:29:08The fuck?
00:29:09Pardon?
00:29:10Yeah, I
00:29:12Didn't have the
00:29:14Heart to open it
00:29:15So, um
00:29:15I'll just
00:29:16Bring it with me, okay?
00:29:18New year
00:29:18New you
00:29:19New us
00:29:20Oh, is Vermont cold?
00:29:22I can
00:29:43Everybody out in 30 minutes
00:29:45Or Hulk is going to see me smash
00:29:49Iceberg ahead
00:29:5030 clicks
00:29:50Abandoned ship
00:29:51Lady Tomato about to burst
00:29:53Hey, hey, hey
00:29:55Les promised me a minute
00:29:59I'll give you 20
00:30:17Excuse me?
00:30:19I thought the boots up my ass
00:30:21Might start after the holidays
00:30:23Martin signed the LOI ASAP
00:30:25And Hilton turned on the money hose
00:30:27In good faith
00:30:27I didn't sign
00:30:28I'm a partner
00:30:29Apparently not the important one
00:30:32Oh
00:30:32Well
00:30:34Now I'm inspired
00:30:35And I would like you
00:30:36To leave
00:30:37A genius needs his space
00:30:39Exactly
00:30:41And I plan on being inspired
00:30:43Throughout the holidays
00:30:44I know this is a difficult transition period
00:30:47I'll give you tonight
00:30:48But I will be back tomorrow
00:30:52Boots on the ground
00:30:53Dr. Littlejohn
00:30:58Fuck me
00:31:10Also, here we are
00:31:12With the
00:31:14Who else
00:31:18No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:31:46No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:32:14Starla?
00:32:25Les?
00:32:26Freezers, off limits from now on till I say.
00:32:28I need to regroup.
00:32:30Where are you going?
00:32:31I'm leaving you.
00:32:33If anyone should be leaving anyone, I should be leaving you.
00:32:35How's that?
00:32:36For trying to sabotage my career?
00:32:38Think I don't know?
00:32:38You don't think Niels will call me for comment, Lindy?
00:32:41Scientific American, not TMZ.
00:32:44I'm a hoax.
00:32:45I'm threatened by a female scientist taking credit for my work.
00:32:48You mentioned Joan.
00:32:50I'm not a misogynist.
00:32:52I'm not intentionally.
00:32:53For anything, I'm an accidental misogynist.
00:32:55And I, too, blame the patriarchy for that.
00:32:57I never said misogynist.
00:32:59Why would you do this?
00:33:00Why?
00:33:00You don't know.
00:33:01Why?
00:33:02This is about Gary and Meg.
00:33:05This is about you.
00:33:06And our marriage.
00:33:08And breaking the promise of step three, colon, a grand gesture.
00:33:12And our daughter who hates me.
00:33:14Sucking the life out of me and my promising writing career.
00:33:17Career?
00:33:18Stop!
00:33:19It was one book in the early aughts.
00:33:22This is what you did.
00:33:23You basically, you turned in a book report on your fucked up family.
00:33:26You changed the names, you added a little bit of wry sarcasm, and then you called it fiction, and you
00:33:31got lucky.
00:33:32My rainbow starts with black.
00:33:34No shit.
00:33:35My book report and the subsequent Oscar-nominated film it's based on bought and paid for this extravagantly sad McMansion
00:33:45in this podunk red state town you forced us to move to so that you could try to be something
00:33:51other than Mr. Fucking Tomato Head.
00:33:54It's the last thing I need right now.
00:33:55Oh my gosh.
00:33:56I'm so sorry.
00:33:57What is it you need right now?
00:33:59I need you.
00:34:00Yeah.
00:34:01I need your support.
00:34:02This is my last chance.
00:34:04You already got your prize.
00:34:07And, in case you forgot, I was by your side for every fucking sentence.
00:34:12Every book signing, every interview.
00:34:14I held your purse.
00:34:16I held my tongue.
00:34:17You know, I was there for the ride.
00:34:18And it wasn't always pleasant.
00:34:20You know, the roller coaster of insecurity and emotion was frankly fucking exhausting.
00:34:24I have paid that debt.
00:34:26I have been by your side for 15 years.
00:34:29You had flavor saver.
00:34:32And it was insufferable.
00:34:36Still is.
00:34:37But I didn't get my moment in the spotlight like you did.
00:34:40I didn't get my prize.
00:34:42Swing and a miss.
00:34:43How is it my fault?
00:34:46How?
00:34:47My apologies.
00:34:48Forgive me for being ambitious.
00:34:50Coasting by on a one-hit wonder isn't enough for me.
00:34:54Maybe you don't have another hit in you.
00:34:56Huh?
00:34:56Maybe you're one and done.
00:34:58Maybe your ego just won't let you read the room.
00:35:01I would rather be blinded by my ego than paralyzed by fear.
00:35:04That's me?
00:35:04That's what you think of me?
00:35:05Yeah, because you haven't produced one goddamn sentence in 15 years.
00:35:09What kind of magic do you think you're suddenly going to find in your beloved gray house?
00:35:12Huh?
00:35:13With me by your side, like an emotional support animal, encouraging you, keeping you calm.
00:35:18Because, quote, I promise we'd return there one day, unquote.
00:35:21I mean, I am through being held emotionally hostage for your creative paralysis.
00:35:28And there it is, everyone.
00:35:30That's our show.
00:35:32Same line every time.
00:35:40This is the top secret thing you've been working on?
00:35:44Give me that.
00:35:45Give me that.
00:35:45A Tonka truck is not going to change the world, let alone agriculture as we know it.
00:35:51You have no idea what you're talking about.
00:35:52This is what you said to every female scientist that's never had a better idea.
00:35:55You know, most men overcompensate with a big truck.
00:35:59It's nice to see yours to scale.
00:36:03Ah!
00:36:04Ah!
00:36:06Jesus.
00:36:07What a gentleman.
00:36:09Oh, fuck.
00:36:11What?
00:36:11Oh, no, Lindy.
00:36:13What?
00:36:13What?
00:36:14What did you do?
00:36:15What did you do?
00:36:30Oh, God.
00:36:32Oh, God.
00:36:33Is she dead?
00:36:39Lindy.
00:36:41Say something.
00:36:42Are you alive?
00:36:44Oh, you're alive!
00:36:48Fuck you!
00:36:50Fuck you!
00:36:53Fuck you!
00:36:59Oh!
00:37:09¡Suscríbete al canal!
00:37:34¡Suscríbete al canal!
00:38:00¡Suscríbete al canal!
00:38:07¡Suscríbete al canal!
00:38:19¡Suscríbete al canal!
00:38:26¡Suscríbete al canal!
00:38:31Less
00:38:38Who's at the door?
00:38:51What is this nonsense?
00:39:01No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:39:03Lindy?
00:39:04Everything is fine.
00:39:06Don't freak out.
00:39:17Lindy?
00:39:17No!
00:39:20OK.
00:39:21I'm opening up the dollhouse.
00:39:23Stop screaming at me!
00:39:29Whoa!
00:39:30Whoa!
00:39:31No!
00:39:32No!
00:39:33No!
00:39:34No!
00:39:35Whoa!
00:39:36Whoa!
00:39:37Whoa!
00:39:38Whoa!
00:39:40Oh!
00:39:41Oh!
00:39:42Oh!
00:39:42Oh!
00:39:43Oh!
00:39:44Oh!
00:39:45Oh!
00:39:47Oh!
00:39:47There you are!
00:39:49You're OK!
00:39:53I am not!
00:39:56OK!
00:39:56Hey!
00:39:57Can you hear me?
00:39:58I am not OK!
00:40:06I am not OK!
00:40:08It works!
00:40:08I can hear you!
00:40:10You're too loud!
00:40:12Sorry.
00:40:13Well now I can't hear you!
00:40:15How about now?
00:40:16No.
00:40:17Too loud.
00:40:18Now?
00:40:19Softer.
00:40:20No.
00:40:21Better.
00:40:22I hate this fucking thing!
00:40:27Can you hear me now?
00:40:29Say again.
00:40:30Can you hear me now?
00:40:31Yes!
00:40:32Oh!
00:40:33Sorry.
00:40:33Sorry.
00:40:34I'm so sorry.
00:40:35Are you OK?
00:40:36I'm fine.
00:40:37I heard that.
00:40:38God, I think we got it.
00:40:41Hi.
00:40:42What the fuck, Les?
00:40:44I heard that too.
00:40:46Loud and clear.
00:40:47OK?
00:40:48Wendy, I'm so sorry.
00:40:49It was an accident.
00:40:50And uh...
00:40:51I can't believe it even happened.
00:40:53I...
00:40:53I...
00:40:53But you're incredible!
00:40:55I mean...
00:40:56You're beautiful!
00:41:01Are you smiling right now?
00:41:04No!
00:41:05No, no, no.
00:41:05No, of course not.
00:41:06I...
00:41:06I just...
00:41:08I...
00:41:08Just like...
00:41:10Wow.
00:41:12Wow.
00:41:13Wow?
00:41:14No, I apologize.
00:41:16You're my wife and you're not experimentally.
00:41:18Oh, I should hope so!
00:41:20Jesus!
00:41:21Oh my God!
00:41:22This is your job?
00:41:24This how you're gonna solve world hunger?
00:41:26You're gonna make everybody tiny so...
00:41:29So they don't what?
00:41:30Eat more?
00:41:30I don't...
00:41:31Uh...
00:41:31Do you...
00:41:32Do you want me to answer that?
00:41:34Or...
00:41:34Explain it to me!
00:41:36Well...
00:41:37Um...
00:41:38It's called...
00:41:39Cellular reduction.
00:41:40And um...
00:41:41It's the process of miniaturization and restoration of organic fruit and vegetables.
00:41:46And that's how I plan to solve world hunger.
00:41:50Explain how you're gonna make me big again!
00:41:52Jesus!
00:41:53I don't give a shit how it works!
00:41:55Oh, right.
00:41:55Well, I just reversed the process.
00:41:57That's the restoration part.
00:41:59Great!
00:42:01Restore me!
00:42:03No, please!
00:42:04I can do that.
00:42:06Um...
00:42:06Uh...
00:42:07But first, uh...
00:42:08A surprise!
00:42:09Meet me in the dining room.
00:42:14Merry Christmas, Lindy.
00:42:16Les, do I look merry or hungry?
00:42:19Well, it's kinda hard to tell from this distance, um...
00:42:22I'm not!
00:42:23Make me big again, now!
00:42:26Heard that?
00:42:26Loud and clear?
00:42:28Um...
00:42:28The thing is...
00:42:29Tell me you can make me big again, Les!
00:42:32I can.
00:42:32And I will.
00:42:33Um...
00:42:34The thing is...
00:42:35That it's just...
00:42:35I think it's just gonna take a day, uh...
00:42:38Or two.
00:42:39Tops.
00:42:39But...
00:42:40You'll be fine.
00:42:41Everything's gonna be okay.
00:42:42You're healthy.
00:42:43I checked your vitals.
00:42:44Wait!
00:42:44I could die?
00:42:45Tiny?
00:42:46No, you...
00:42:47You're not gonna die, Tiny.
00:42:50You'll be safe in the dollhouse.
00:42:52Because it's almost exactly the same as our house-house.
00:42:56Um...
00:42:57The stove works.
00:42:58The refrigerator works.
00:43:00There's food.
00:43:01The water runs.
00:43:02And...
00:43:02I shrunk a few of your favorite things to really make you feel at home-home.
00:43:06Your clothes.
00:43:08From your closet.
00:43:11Um...
00:43:12And, uh...
00:43:12This...
00:43:13Curling thing.
00:43:17And...
00:43:17Your hairbrush.
00:43:19Uh...
00:43:19Cold cream.
00:43:21Looked important.
00:43:22Oh, and I remembered your coffee.
00:43:24And the coffee maker.
00:43:25Worked perfectly, right?
00:43:27Oh!
00:43:27One crucial thing.
00:43:28Um...
00:43:29The toilet.
00:43:29Uh...
00:43:30It works.
00:43:30I figured it out.
00:43:32Just don't ever look in the hall closet.
00:43:33Downstairs.
00:43:34Ever.
00:43:35You will be restored to regular size.
00:43:37I...
00:43:37I promise it.
00:43:38This is just temporary, Lindy.
00:43:40I am so close.
00:43:41Truly.
00:43:42Now it's so close?!
00:43:45Not a day or two...
00:43:47Tops?!
00:43:48LESS?!
00:43:49YOU MOTHERFUCKER!
00:43:53Hey.
00:43:54Calm.
00:43:54Calm down.
00:43:57Calm fucking down.
00:44:01Agh!
00:44:04Agh!
00:44:07Agh!
00:44:11Agh!
00:44:12Agh!
00:44:12Agh!
00:44:13Agh!
00:44:14Agh!
00:44:15Agh!
00:44:18Hey, Lindy.
00:44:21I'm gonna need a minute!
00:44:48No, no, no, no.
00:44:53Because we've got plans. Yep.
00:44:56We've got concrete plans.
00:45:01How about a 10-day getaway to Vermont for two?
00:45:07Uber romantic.
00:45:15There are multiple reasons you could be late.
00:45:18No, I know Lindy's coming.
00:45:19Why, you may ask?
00:45:21Because our love story is woven into the fabric of time.
00:45:26Destined to be written.
00:45:29Immortalized for generations to come.
00:45:33Quiet, everybody, please.
00:45:34Quiet, please!
00:45:36Sorry.
00:45:37Oh.
00:45:38It's work.
00:45:40It's work.
00:45:42Hey, Martin.
00:45:44Well, I was going to head out of town, so...
00:45:48No, no, no, no, no.
00:45:49Of course, of course.
00:45:50I'll just head into the lab.
00:45:55No, I've not heard from us.
00:45:58Wait, what do you mean you can't get a hold of him?
00:46:02Okay, bye.
00:46:03Does this mean your romantic getaway is canceled?
00:46:07Bart, can I be honest?
00:46:08I love your service, but I don't love the negative energy.
00:46:15He's suffering.
00:46:21Take those off.
00:46:22I feel like a specimen.
00:46:24And come closer.
00:46:25I don't want to keep yelling.
00:46:30Jesus, the 96?
00:46:33If there was ever a time.
00:46:34I know why you didn't tell me about your work.
00:46:37Well, I couldn't.
00:46:38It was top secret.
00:46:39I signed an ironclad NDA.
00:46:41That's bullshit.
00:46:43You didn't trust me.
00:46:45Which makes me so sad.
00:46:49Makes me so sad.
00:46:52Fuck you.
00:46:53But, yeah.
00:46:59Well, I didn't exactly hide it from you, either.
00:47:02What?
00:47:04Happy birthday, Lindy.
00:47:07They are so cute.
00:47:11Wait.
00:47:13And legible?
00:47:14Happy birthday, Lindy.
00:47:17They're so cute.
00:47:19Oh, and functional.
00:47:21Happy birthday, Lindy.
00:47:24How cute.
00:47:26And accurate.
00:47:28The dent from when I sideswiped the mailbox.
00:47:33Never put it together.
00:47:35You also said you didn't want to know.
00:47:40Well, you're not leaving me.
00:47:41Well, I have to go so I can fix you.
00:47:43No, no, no.
00:47:44No, Les.
00:47:45Take me with you.
00:47:46I'm portable.
00:47:47You'll be safer here in the dollhouse.
00:47:48I feel very not safe.
00:47:50I feel very small.
00:47:52And, like, something bad could happen.
00:47:54I won't let something happen.
00:47:55Something did.
00:47:57Something else.
00:47:57Beyond the accident.
00:47:59But I have to go to the lab so I can fix you.
00:48:01Please, Les.
00:48:02I do not want to be alone.
00:48:03Please.
00:48:04I'm scared.
00:48:04Well, what if I can show you that, um, being small isn't scary?
00:48:09Oh, God.
00:48:10I've always wondered what the world would look like if I were six inches tall.
00:48:13Not me.
00:48:15I can show you.
00:48:16No, I, I don't.
00:48:18Aren't you just a little bit curious?
00:48:20I will be restored to regular size soon.
00:48:24I promise.
00:48:25Trust me.
00:48:29Okay.
00:48:32This is crazy.
00:48:34Oh, my.
00:48:36Oh, my.
00:48:37Oh, my.
00:48:37Oh, my.
00:48:38Oh.
00:48:39Oh.
00:48:43Oh, my.
00:48:45Oh, my.
00:48:46Oh, my.
00:48:51Oh, my.
00:49:11I mean, everything's really big.
00:49:14Really.
00:49:28Wow.
00:49:29I can only imagine how different everything looks, right?
00:49:33You see this dust ball?
00:49:36Do you think I could choke on this?
00:49:39Oh.
00:49:41Yeah, put that down.
00:49:44Hello, Dolores.
00:49:45Look who it is.
00:49:47See?
00:49:48She's not that scary.
00:49:49Why is she looking at me like that?
00:49:52Oh, oh, it's puffing up.
00:49:53Do you see what it's doing?
00:49:55No, no, no.
00:49:56It's trying to eat me.
00:49:57No, this is not interesting to me.
00:50:00Can you put me down, please?
00:50:01Put me down.
00:50:01It's fun, right?
00:50:16We all love a train ride.
00:50:17Woo!
00:50:18Merry Christmas, Lindy.
00:50:21Merry Christmas, Lindy.
00:50:28Merry Christmas, Lindy.
00:50:31Merry Christmas.
00:50:33Merry Christmas, Lindy.
00:50:39Merry Christmas to me.
00:50:46Merry Christmas, Lindy.
00:50:48Merry Christmas, Lindy.
00:50:49Maybe too many times around.
00:50:51¡Vamos a salir!
00:50:53¡Vamos a salir!
00:50:55¡Vamos a salir!
00:50:57¡Oh!
00:50:59¡Oh, Dios!
00:51:01¡Oh!
00:51:03¡Oh!
00:51:05¡Hey!
00:51:07¡It's going to be ok!
00:51:09¡Oh, I'm so sorry this happened!
00:51:12¡Oh!
00:51:13¡Oh!
00:51:24The water truck ran out of shrinking gas.
00:51:26I'm going to go to the lab to refuel.
00:51:28What am I supposed to do with this?
00:51:30I thought I could crush it up and you could maybe snort it, but I don't know.
00:51:34Um, Scarface?
00:51:35I'll just gnaw on it or something.
00:51:41How are you feeling?
00:51:43Really?
00:51:44I mean...
00:51:45I know what you mean.
00:51:47Better.
00:51:50I did always love this couch.
00:52:06When you're ready.
00:52:07Ah, pour away.
00:52:13Don't be shy.
00:52:16So...
00:52:16This is my, uh...
00:52:20Tiny little life now?
00:52:22Temporary.
00:52:22Tiny life.
00:52:23How long again?
00:52:24A day.
00:52:25Two at the most.
00:52:26I'm so close.
00:52:28So close.
00:52:28Yeah.
00:52:29Yeah.
00:52:34Did you microwave this off the floor?
00:52:36Floor is clean.
00:52:37You're the first person to ever walk on it.
00:52:39Six inch tall Neil fucking Armstrong?
00:52:42Kind of.
00:52:51Less you put parmesan in the potatoes.
00:52:54Potatoes a la Diane.
00:52:57With a twist.
00:52:59Who?
00:53:00Reese Witherspoon from Legally Blonde.
00:53:02She's gonna play me in the movie.
00:53:04She's gonna play the sister character.
00:53:06I still don't know who that is.
00:53:07Walt?
00:53:08She's blonde, wears pink, goes to Harvard.
00:53:11That's a stretch.
00:53:12What?
00:53:13I am blonde.
00:53:14Less said that we could be twins.
00:53:16I'm sure he's just being kind.
00:53:18No, no, I think with the bright hair and makeup, you know Hollywood, I mean...
00:53:21It's beyond me why they're even adapting a book into a film.
00:53:23Because it sold a million copies, because it won the Pulitzer.
00:53:28Hollywood must be out of ideas.
00:53:31You're not excited?
00:53:32Uh, Laura Dern is playing the mother.
00:53:34I adore Laura Dern, but I question her judgment.
00:53:38The book wasn't well received.
00:53:39I repeat, it won the Pulitzer.
00:53:41The Guardian dubbed it literary popcorn and added,
00:53:44that does not a Pulitzer make their words.
00:53:46Which she memorized and repeat constantly.
00:53:49I can barely show my face at Wine Club Wednesday,
00:53:53without Carol turning her nose up at me as if I were the devil incarnate.
00:53:57Walt?
00:53:57Your mother needs your Wine Club Wednesdays.
00:54:00That's not a stretch.
00:54:01Mom, it's fiction.
00:54:03Carol didn't see a character.
00:54:06Carol saw me, and the me in your book is a monster.
00:54:09It's a comedy.
00:54:10It's a dark comedy.
00:54:11A coming of age story about a woman who felt abandoned and silenced
00:54:17by a monster of a mother character.
00:54:20You try being a single mother of two young girls,
00:54:25whose husband walked out one day without a word.
00:54:28Walked out or was driven away?
00:54:29Jim abandoned me.
00:54:31No, he stopped being married to you.
00:54:34He abandoned me.
00:54:36Me too.
00:54:37And he's still the hero.
00:54:39I tried my best.
00:54:42Walt, if I may.
00:54:43Walt, Diane, have you tried the potatoes?
00:54:46I call them potatoes a la Diane with a twist.
00:54:50Is the twist a turn of the knife?
00:54:52It's Parmesan cheese.
00:54:53Try it.
00:55:00It's too rich, but absolutely divine.
00:55:03Just like you.
00:55:09Walt.
00:55:10I'm sorry.
00:55:10I think we should visit the arch tomorrow.
00:55:13I hear it's dreadful.
00:55:16Yes.
00:55:17Yes.
00:55:17No, I don't get the arch.
00:55:19It's like an arch for what?
00:55:21It's the gateway to the west.
00:55:24I think it's great.
00:55:25I can barely show my face on wine club Wednesdays.
00:55:30Hollywood has run out of ideas.
00:55:31I think Laura Dern is very generous casting.
00:55:34I have to say hello.
00:55:40What's going on?
00:55:41Do you want to have sex?
00:55:42Oh, yes.
00:55:43Yes, please.
00:55:43We're here.
00:55:45We'll be quiet.
00:55:46We'll be fine.
00:55:47All right.
00:55:47You're set to high volume.
00:55:50Watch.
00:55:51Watch.
00:55:51Watch.
00:55:54Okay.
00:55:55Okay.
00:55:56Good.
00:55:56Come on.
00:55:57Come on.
00:55:57Come on.
00:56:07Come on.
00:56:13Come on.
00:56:19Come on.
00:56:25Jesus.
00:56:27Whoa.
00:56:27¿Can I help you?
00:56:29Obviamente, this isn't the washroom.
00:56:31It's down the hall with the light on.
00:56:33The one with the toilet.
00:56:34I can see the light.
00:56:41He's trying to escape.
00:56:45To the arch.
00:56:48Oh my God.
00:56:50Oh fuck.
00:56:51Okay, okay.
00:56:53Maybe I can't be quiet.
00:56:55I don't think you can.
00:56:58Hey.
00:57:03I'm not really like her though, right?
00:57:05My mother, I'm not like Diane, am I?
00:57:09Does that make me Walt?
00:57:12Seriously?
00:57:12Seriously?
00:57:14Seriously?
00:57:16No.
00:57:17Fuck no.
00:57:19No, she's unbelievable.
00:57:20Not in a good way.
00:57:24It's going to be okay.
00:57:26It's going to be a few days.
00:57:31Only a few days.
00:57:38It's only a few days.
00:57:39I'll see you.
00:57:40I'll see you next week.
00:57:51I'll see you next week.
00:57:54Yeah.
00:57:55Yeah, man.
00:57:59Fire 즉.
00:58:03Fire which is a shorthand.
00:58:06I'll see you next week.
00:58:07Yes, sir.
00:58:08May I get the fire.
00:58:10¿Qué?
00:58:11¿Qué?
00:58:12¿Qué?
00:58:14¿Qué?
00:58:17No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:58:45Macu.
00:58:49Macu.
00:58:51Stay.
00:58:55No, no, no, no, no.
00:59:00Macu.
00:59:02Come here.
00:59:05Ow, fuck.
00:59:07You fuzzy fucker.
00:59:20Stop. Stop, Ed, you're fine. You feel bad enough already.
00:59:29I mean, she's safe, right?
00:59:47Hey. Yes, Richard? What is it?
00:59:49Oh, you seem upset.
00:59:51No, Richard, I'm fine. I'm fine.
00:59:53You know, I sometimes come in my car to cry, too, when I need a release, so I get where
00:59:59you're at.
01:00:00Okay, right? Is that all?
01:00:02Now you've got me worried.
01:00:03Is everything all right at home? You know, with your wife, Lindy.
01:00:06Lindy's her name, right? Everything okay?
01:00:08Good, good.
01:00:09Good. Yeah.
01:00:10She's just, uh, keeping busy over the holidays.
01:00:13Yes, Richard, she's at home writing. She's keeping busy.
01:00:16She's writing, writing. That's wonderful. That's wonderful.
01:00:20Richard, get your butt inside. I'm sorry you used profanity. I'm upset.
01:00:28I'll see you later.
01:00:53I'll see you later.
01:01:00I have to trust him
01:01:02I cannot spiral
01:01:07Oh, yeah
01:01:09Why not
01:01:10Okay, that's it
01:01:13That's good, space colon
01:01:14Colon
01:01:17Colonel
01:01:19Colonel, space colonel
01:01:22Next stop, Uranus
01:01:24I couldn't
01:01:26Fuck, I'm already spiraling
01:01:27You made me believe you were so close
01:01:30So I believed you
01:01:32Yes, and you should believe me, that's our deal
01:01:33There is mathematical truth in stating I am so close
01:01:36So what does so close
01:01:39Mean to you in this context today?
01:01:42I can't put an actual number on it
01:01:44I don't know
01:01:46What?
01:01:48What have you done?
01:01:49What have I done?
01:01:51Martin, I didn't want to say you have one job
01:01:53Contract is for 30 days
01:01:56That's insane!
01:01:57Well, you said that you were close!
01:01:5930 days?
01:02:02Well, it will work
01:02:03I mean, the math says it will and math is never wrong
01:02:06So
01:02:07Now you have 30 days!
01:02:09No, no, no, we have 30 days
01:02:10Oh, now it's we
01:02:11What does it say exactly?
01:02:12What does the small print say?
01:02:14Exactly
01:02:14It says that we have 30 days to prove that the restoration formula works
01:02:19Uh-huh
01:02:20Or the patent on our tech
01:02:22On my tech, thank you
01:02:23Reverts to Hilton
01:02:24Uh-huh
01:02:25And Hilton sues you
01:02:26Sues us
01:02:28For fraud
01:02:29And you go to jail
01:02:31To jail?
01:02:32Well, can he do that?
01:02:33He can
01:02:34And after 30 days, it goes
01:02:36The tech, the lab, the bobs
01:02:38Gone
01:02:40But, but
01:02:42Okay, so how do I make
01:02:45How do I
01:02:48How do I make things big again?
01:02:49Because I have to make things big again
01:02:51Well, after 30 days
01:02:53You can't
01:02:59I mean, can he actually do this?
01:03:01Yes, yes, he can
01:03:02It says it right here
01:03:04Oh, Les
01:03:09How bad is this?
01:03:12Okay
01:03:17I'm not even going to ask about the cap
01:03:36I got you something for Christmas
01:03:40I didn't get you anything
01:03:43Oh, that's
01:03:44It's okay
01:03:45I didn't want you
01:03:48Like what Shakespeare used to write with
01:03:50You know I like Shakespeare?
01:03:52Well, everybody knows you like Shakespeare
01:03:55Barsgard
01:03:55Well, you talk about it a lot
01:03:58Um
01:04:00You seem a little bit down
01:04:02No, I'm just tired
01:04:04I was waiting up last night for someone
01:04:09Someone special
01:04:10You know, and it's just
01:04:13You know
01:04:14Well, Merry Christmas, Richard
01:04:16Oh, thank you, Janet
01:04:17This is a very thoughtful gift
01:04:19So
01:04:19Thank you
01:04:25Thy returneth
01:04:26To thine grind
01:04:36Okay
01:04:38Buddy
01:04:40Thank you for moving here
01:04:53Oh, that's good
01:04:56Okay
01:05:02Come on
01:05:07Okay
01:05:09Oh, my God
01:05:14Oh, there we go
01:05:18Guide
01:05:22Oh
01:05:23A classic
01:05:25Gum
01:05:30Volume
01:05:33We're never turning this off
01:05:35Okay, Sax
01:05:37So
01:05:40We've got popcorn
01:05:42But no candy
01:05:47Oh, less
01:05:49That's just for me
01:05:59Richard
01:05:59I need everyone at the top of their game today
01:06:01It's a big day
01:06:02It could be the day
01:06:03It needs to be the day
01:06:04Or two
01:06:06At the most
01:06:11Here are my thoughts
01:06:15Adjust the last line
01:06:17Of the Maxwell stress tensor
01:06:18To B sub j
01:06:19Minus one half times
01:06:21The quantity of epsilon naught
01:06:23Times e squared
01:06:24Plus b squared over mu naught
01:06:27Thoughts complete
01:06:28Bob
01:06:30Implement its thoughts
01:06:36B sub j
01:06:37Minus one half
01:06:38Times the quantity
01:06:40Of epsilon naught
01:06:41Times e squared
01:06:42Plus b squared
01:06:43Over mu naught
01:06:45Complete
01:06:46Carl
01:06:47Implement its thoughts
01:07:00Come here
01:07:01Come here
01:08:17A great attempt in the name of science.
01:08:20Richard, Bob, the explainer.
01:08:23Nominal success. Subjet expanded to regular size for 2.1 seconds.
01:08:28Same as previous attempt.
01:08:30Result, molecular disequilibrium.
01:08:33Eraser Bob, see medic.
01:08:35Bring in Fred.
01:08:36Clean up an aisle, everywhere.
01:08:37Richard?
01:08:39We're waiting on analysis to proceed.
01:08:41We'll adjust based on your thoughts.
01:08:43I'll go again.
01:08:45No, you won't.
01:08:46If this is your definition of close, we have a big problem.
01:08:50You working in a bubble with your staff and your secrets ends today.
01:08:55Moving forward, everything that happens in this lab will be authorized by me.
01:08:59No.
01:09:00No, no, no, no.
01:09:01Um, this is not how we work here.
01:09:05We are making history, okay?
01:09:07That corn was regular size.
01:09:10It's incredible.
01:09:11As a scientist, how can you not see that?
01:09:13Reports, equipment, results, any spending whatsoever.
01:09:16Everything you use must be logged up to and including packets of instant oatmeal in the break room.
01:09:22Can I explain my fiber deficiencies?
01:09:24Okay, everybody, everybody.
01:09:25This is Virginia.
01:09:26Vivian.
01:09:27Vivian.
01:09:27I don't know her last name, but she's new here and she doesn't know how things work.
01:09:31And Bob, you don't need to worry about your oatmeal, okay?
01:09:33Can we just talk about this?
01:09:36Martin, you know exactly how much money this science circus is hemorrhaging.
01:09:40I don't care about the money.
01:09:42Of course you don't.
01:09:43You spent seven years and several hundred thousand dollars designing your logo.
01:09:48I had to open the books.
01:09:50Well, it had to be perfect.
01:09:51What?
01:09:52Irresponsible and deeply sad.
01:09:54Dr. Littlejohn, it's no longer your money.
01:09:56It's Hilton Smith's money.
01:09:57This is his lab now and I run Hilton's lab.
01:10:00Ergo, I run this lab.
01:10:02This is unacceptable.
01:10:04And it's ridiculous.
01:10:05And do, do something.
01:10:08Okay, no we, no we, just me.
01:10:10I want to talk to Hilton right now.
01:10:13Well, good luck reaching him.
01:10:15He's spending the holidays piloting an experimental submersible off the coast of Guam.
01:10:20Guam?
01:10:21Guam?
01:10:22What?
01:10:23Shut it down.
01:10:24We'll try again tomorrow, together.
01:10:27These ladders are an OSHA violation.
01:10:30You're an OSHA violation!
01:10:33Dear hairy Jesus!
01:10:35And I hope Hilton gets crushed into ketchup by 400 atmospheres of pressure!
01:10:4029 days.
01:10:41Not helpful.
01:10:42Not!
01:10:43The point!
01:10:51What have I done?
01:10:58Good night.
01:11:01I have to stay.
01:11:17I have to stay.
01:11:20We have to stay.
01:11:22¿Qué es mi teléfono?
01:11:25¡Mi teléfono!
01:11:26¡Oh! ¡Oh!
01:11:30¡Como! ¡Como!
01:11:32¡What?!
01:11:44¡No!
01:11:45¡No!
01:11:47¡No!
01:11:54¡No!
01:11:57¡No!
01:12:04Fuck, did you just say something?
01:12:12Am I losing my mind?
01:12:20I can see me in you.
01:12:26Do you know?
01:12:27What?
01:12:28What is that?
01:12:32Oh, fuck.
01:12:38I gotta get out of here!
01:12:45Oh, fuck!
01:12:46Oh, fuck!
01:12:54Fuck!
01:12:55God damn it!
01:12:58For fuck's sake.
01:13:03God dang it!
01:13:05No!
01:13:06Fuck!
01:13:13Ah!
01:13:18Ah!
01:13:20Ah!
01:13:21Ah!
01:13:23Ah!
01:13:24Ah!
01:13:25Ah!
01:13:27Ah!
01:13:29Ah!
01:13:34Ah!
01:13:38Ah!
01:13:43Ah!
01:13:47Ah!
01:13:49Ah!
01:13:50Ah!
01:13:51Oh, oh.
01:13:52Oh, oh!
01:13:53Oh, oh.
01:14:08Oh, oh.
01:14:11Oh, oh, oh.
01:14:14Oh, oh.
01:14:17What the?
01:14:19Oh, oh.
01:14:23Oh, Dios. Oh, Dios.
01:14:24Oh, oh.
01:14:27Oh, Dios.
01:14:33¡Legas! ¡Legas!
01:14:35¡Legas! ¡Legas! ¡Legas!
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