- 8 minutes ago
Crookhaven S01E01 (2026)
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TVTranscript
00:05¡Suscríbete al canal!
00:30¡Suscríbete al canal!
01:08¡Suscríbete al canal!
01:30¡Stop right there!
02:11¡Suscríbete al canal!
02:14¡Suscríbete al canal!
02:23¡Suscríbete al canal!
02:24¡Suscríbete al canal!
02:51¡Suscríbete al canal!
03:02¡Suscríbete al canal!
03:18¡Suscríbete al canal!
03:22¡SPIQUIPART!
03:23¡Suscríbete al canal!
03:23¡Suscríbete al canal!
03:44¿Dónde estoy?
04:04No se, nada, nada, nada...
04:07¡No se, nada, nada!
04:08¡No se, nada, nada!
04:11¡No se, nada!
04:12No se, nada, nada.
04:13No se, nada, nada.
04:15¡No, nada!
04:16¡No, nada!
04:16¡No se, nada!
04:18Bienvenido, un accidente de un lugarrado...
04:20¡No, nada, nada!
04:21¡Era una estatua de las cosas!
04:22¡Sombre la justicia de esto y el policía de Las Casas!
04:25¿Qué?
04:26¿Qué?
04:28¿Qué?
04:29¡Can I hacer la misma pregunta?
04:33¿Dónde están? ¿Estamos en el medio de una conversación aquí?
04:36Rude.
04:41¿Estás de interés?
04:43¿No eres un toldo que, por ejemplo, pude a train
04:45por, por decir, un mensaje de cripto en tu computadora?
04:47¿Por qué?
04:48Cuando te haces ese mensaje,
04:49¿no eres, hypothetically,
04:50quizás, engajado en algo
04:53ethically challenging?
04:54¿Qué si lo hubiera?
04:57Mira, parece que nos son como
04:58dos bros aquí por el mismo
04:59geniúas, ¿no, no, no, no?
05:01¿Sabes qué sabemos?
05:03All I know is
05:04whoever this is,
05:05I need to take back what they stole.
05:07You didn't stole nothing from us.
05:09And do whatever it takes
05:10to stop them grassing me up,
05:12otherwise my life
05:13is basically over.
05:59You're hackers.
06:01What makes you say that?
06:02Jigs up bro, mys up, ass.
06:05Yeah, we are actually the Brothers Crim. Amade, zede.
06:11The Brothers Crim?
06:13B-hacking legends?
06:15No?
06:17And you are?
06:19The signal's just gone.
06:22Someone blocked it. Look, the screen's just died.
06:33This, this whole thing's a trap. That phone is not going to be the only thing that's there to you.
06:37We're lost.
06:39In the middle of a wood, no way of calling it out. No one even knows we're here.
06:44Except...
06:44Them.
06:47Whoever them even is.
07:00It's a maze. This whole wood's a maze.
07:03Yeah, right. It's a maze.
07:06It's not a trap.
07:08It's a test.
07:10Come on.
07:11I know where to go.
07:25Level one complete.
07:28Power up.
07:29Sorry, how exactly did you do that?
07:31Ha, lucky. Yes.
07:38Where's the place to put a statue?
07:40Ezekiel Locket, 1781 to 1857.
07:45What's up with Ezekiel?
07:48Can we have help here?
08:03Want to hear a joke?
08:05How many kids does it take to open a door?
08:07One to pick the lock, and the other three to stand around like morons.
08:11You don't have brought us here.
08:13Clearly not, dude. I'm in the same kayak as you.
08:15Word to the wise.
08:21Followed your sense of station.
08:2412.3 miles.
08:26We were being followed.
08:27Knew it.
08:29Why not show your face till now?
08:31I assumed this was a trap, and you would all die horribly.
08:40Nope.
08:42It's a decoy.
08:43Real lock must be hidden.
08:52Metal god.
08:54Why is he pointing at the wall?
08:56Not as dumb as you look.
09:02Metal god.
09:04Oh, duh.
09:05Totally different colour.
09:10Watch and learn, suckers.
09:34Watch and learn, suckers.
09:36Hey!
09:36I'm awake. I'm awake. I'm awake. I'm...
09:38Oh.
09:40Head rush.
09:43Hang on.
09:45Four of yous.
09:47Together already? I wasn't expecting you for hours.
09:50Right then.
09:51Give me a hand, would you?
09:52Yeah, right. We'll just get on some random boat.
09:56Weird looking stranger.
09:58Maybe start with who you are.
10:00And why we're here.
10:02First one's easy.
10:03I'm Mickey.
10:05But I'm not at liberty to tell you the rest.
10:07Just supposed to ferry folk to the island.
10:10What's on the island?
10:12Your future.
10:19But where we were going wasn't just our future.
10:25We were heading for a whole new world.
10:27A million miles from the one we knew.
10:30A world I'd never have believed even existed.
10:35Until I saw it with my own two eyes.
10:42Welcome to Crookhaven!
10:45Welcome to Crookhaven!
10:56Right, you lot can't surrender all electric devices.
10:59You're like cutting my arm off.
11:00Really? That can be arranged some.
11:06Give me eight.
11:08Dude, it's a camera.
11:10I'm not gonna make any calls on it.
11:12Right, look lively.
11:13Come along, keep it moving.
11:15Let's go!
11:35Is that some kind of swanky mansion?
11:37But why did bike guy say it's our future?
11:39Guessing it's not a luxury hotel.
11:42No one else getting major prison vibes?
11:46Now I am.
11:57Right, Al.
11:59Horace.
12:00Get this on charge.
12:01Let the gaffer know we have all four of them guests.
12:11You understand about catching flies.
12:14Come on.
12:15In you trot.
12:16¡Gracias!
12:47The motive governs the meat.
12:50Yeah, that's our credo.
12:52Sorry, this must all seem very confusing.
12:55Overwhelming.
12:56But come.
12:57We'll explain everything.
13:00So this is a school.
13:02Crookhaven's not just a school.
13:04It's the world's oldest academy for crooks,
13:06and the most exclusive.
13:08The theory.
13:10All crooklings must register within five minutes
13:13or we'll assume you're a hostile intellectual.
13:15How does this make sense?
13:16I mean, they get us here by threatening to grasp this to the cops.
13:19And now they want to teach us to be criminals.
13:21Not criminals.
13:23Crooks.
13:24That's the whole point.
13:25We only use our skills to do right.
13:27How do I put this in a way that even a merit can understand?
13:30Criminals. Baddies. Us. Goodies.
13:33What's a merit?
13:35Thank you, Edgar.
13:38We'll take it from here.
13:39My pleasure, Whisper.
13:41And Miss Jericho.
13:42Always happy to help.
13:43See you later.
13:44All deception classes are cancelled.
13:46With me?
13:47All right.
13:47This way.
13:48Hold on. Wait a second.
13:50What is he called Whisper?
13:51Whisper Whisper?
13:52We got hacked by Whisper.
13:54Ain't no other.
13:56For my sins, I teach cyber intrusion.
13:59I teach infiltration.
14:01Sorry, just to be clear.
14:02So you use your skills to do right.
14:05Does that mean you work for, like, the government?
14:07It's a complex symbiosis.
14:10Officially, we don't exist.
14:13Unofficially, we've been vital to global security for almost 200 years.
14:19Come!
14:24And we just entered the fifth dimension.
14:26For twins, total topless, bro.
14:28More like Quintinium nerds.
14:29Bad enough seeing you guys in one mirror.
14:31This is my own personal help.
14:34What is this?
14:35We call it the Specularium.
14:39It's a shortcut and an escape route and a vital training course to hone your spatial orientation.
14:50An elite crook needs all six senses to be on point.
14:54Why do you need an escape route?
14:55Why wouldn't we?
14:57I still don't get why we're here.
14:59Why us?
15:00The crooked complex keeps constant lookout for fresh blood.
15:05The four of you were handpicked out of thousands for your skills.
15:10Crucially, you guys only ever steal for the right reasons.
15:16This way, time to meet the big guy.
15:25My apologies.
15:27I had hoped to welcome you in person, but you completed your tasks far sooner than expected.
15:33Caspian Lockett, your new headmaster, and of course I know fine well who you are.
15:38Ade and Ede Okoro, Gia Wu, and Gabriel Avery.
15:45May I introduce Mr. Karr, our head of deception.
15:53It was you, a posh bloke.
15:58And you, you weren't even a copper.
16:00That was quite the getaway.
16:01The past 24 hours has been a test.
16:04Happily, you passed.
16:07Here you all are.
16:10Whisper and Miss Jericho to the armory, please.
16:14You let me think I was going to jail.
16:15That was the idea.
16:16Yeah, you stole from me.
16:17You stole from me, sir.
16:20Have you set all that up?
16:22No.
16:23Disguise the fake cop.
16:25For me?
16:26We'd have done whatever it took.
16:28Just one thing, Mr. Lockett, sir.
16:30We sincerely appreciate the offer, but our parents aren't exactly going to be down with the idea of us coming
16:35to a school for crims.
16:36What crims?
16:37You're crims, gentlemen.
16:38Crooks.
16:39Naturally, you will stay undercover for the rest of your life.
16:43You can't ask us to do that.
16:45For them to learn the truth could be lethal.
16:47We have some very dangerous enemies.
16:55You're concerned about your grandmother.
16:58Don't be.
16:59We've spoken.
17:00You've done what?
17:01Same goes for all of you.
17:02What did you tell her?
17:03As far as they're concerned, you're sitting an exam for St. Jude's Academy right now.
17:08Should you accept, you'll tell them you've been offered a full scholarship starting at once.
17:11Take tonight, consider carefully.
17:23I don't need time to consider.
17:25There's no way I can leave my grandma.
17:28That's not going to happen.
17:30I'll just take my coin and go.
17:33Thanks all the same.
17:35You disappoint me, Mr. Avery.
17:38But I'm afraid you can't leave now.
17:39The woods are far from safe after dark.
17:42First thing tomorrow.
17:44Unless you change your mind.
17:45Yeah, I won't.
17:48I can't.
17:51Sir.
17:57Reminder to students in the mess.
17:59Please recycle all packaging and return the stolen cutlery to the kitchen.
18:04Silverware is not for skulldouble practice.
18:09I know that, Luke.
18:11I was you once.
18:13Trust me, it's mad how soon it feels like home.
18:17Thanks, but I have a home.
18:21That's Penelope.
18:22The ultimate legacy.
18:24Legacy?
18:25Yeah, you and I, amigo, are merits.
18:27We're here for one reason and one reason only.
18:30Because we're fire.
18:31Keep telling yourself that, Leon.
18:34But most crooks like Isabella here are legacies.
18:37Our parents or our grandparents are here.
18:40Some of us go back generations.
18:41Seven.
18:42In my case.
18:43We met earlier.
18:46Edgar Dillicum.
18:48This is...
18:48Dorian.
18:49MacArthur.
18:50Only third gen.
18:52And, uh, you are?
18:54Gabriel Avery.
18:56A merit.
18:57Good for you.
18:59Look forward to seeing what you can do in class.
19:00Well, I hate to disappoint you, Edgar.
19:03But I won't be sticking around.
19:04Sorry, but you've been offered a place at Crookhaven.
19:07And you're gonna turn it down so you can...
19:09What?
19:10Go back to shoplifting?
19:12Stealing bikes?
19:14That's a good one.
19:15Alright, Dorian.
19:16Wasn't a joke.
19:18Thanks.
19:20Now that I met you,
19:22I know I've made the right decision.
19:33So you don't just walk straight in.
19:35Hand into them on a stolen platter.
19:37A big bunch of napole babies.
19:39Well, that's fundamentally inequitable.
19:40Bro, we're still a part of this.
19:42We get to study cyber intrusion and deception and scorduggery
19:46and at the end of it, we get to be a part of a secret network
19:48that's going to make us rich.
19:50You mean help defeat criminals and restore justice?
19:52Yeah, I've got two wolves.
19:54None of you guys bothered by the whole
19:55lying to your families forever thing?
19:58Your grandma know you're still?
19:59Yeah, you're joking.
20:01So what's the difference?
20:02That's a little why I lie in this.
20:06I mean, this should be a whole secret life.
20:13You know why I'm taking top bunk?
20:15You know why I hate your heights?
20:16Not like I do.
20:17Which one have I painted on the Eiffel Tower, bro?
20:20Only because you haven't eaten in like an hour.
20:21That doesn't count!
20:23Gabriel!
20:24It's not all this for you!
20:27Iron.
20:29As it sells.
20:32Sir.
20:36Lockie stole it again.
20:37What is it?
20:37My coin!
20:38Why am I the only one who keeps robbing?
20:40Hold the phone.
20:43You're saying the thing you came all this way for, risked your life for, was a coin?
20:51Not just any coin.
21:00It's not all this for you.
21:02Not just any coin.
21:03No one was gone.
21:09I know.
21:10Not just any coin.
21:14Not just any coin.
21:15No one wants to go.
21:18It's okay.
21:19No one wants to go.
21:20It's okay.
21:20That's it.
21:35¿Por qué no estás espying on mi Avery?
21:36No no estoy espying, estaba buscando...
21:38¿Qué?
21:40Locket
21:44¿Por qué?
21:47Porque es un amigo de los connosos
21:49Show some respect, that's your headmaster.
21:51No, actually, because I'm not staying.
21:54So, to me, he's just some stuck-up guy in an itchy suit.
21:57He likes playing mind games with kids.
22:00It's pretty messed up, when you think about it.
22:03You're talking about the greatest crook of his generation.
22:06Big whoop.
22:07Happy for him.
22:09Do you have any idea how lucky you are to be here?
22:13And you're just going to throw it away?
22:17So ungrateful.
22:19So ignorant.
22:22What they even see in you.
22:25Not bad, to be fair.
22:30But there's something off.
22:32You just can't quite put my...
22:34Thanks, but I need a critique from someone like you.
22:39Word of warning, don't go marching up to our office.
22:43Won't end well for you.
22:44Thanks, but I don't need advice from someone like you.
22:55It's the eyes, they're greener than that one.
23:14It's the eyes, they're greener than that one.
23:31Evening, Mr. Avery.
23:37What do you want with me?
23:40The first time was to get you here, the second time to keep you here.
23:43I already told you, I can't.
23:46How is stealing my coin going to change that?
23:47By showing how much you have to learn.
23:52I'll know when I need to.
23:53You're a blunt instrument.
23:55You didn't pause to consider why I had taken your coin, or the smartest way to retrieve it.
23:59You just went stomping blindly through the school like a man possessed, telegraphing your weakness.
24:03What weakness?
24:04You see everyone as a threat.
24:08You're a dodgy, posh bloke.
24:10You like blackmailing kids.
24:13You are the threat.
24:17Coin, please, sir.
24:19I'm not here to threaten you, Gabriel.
24:22I'm here to save you.
24:24Save me from what?
24:27I can't bear to see talent go to waste.
24:29It would be a tragedy for you to spend the rest of your life as a petty criminal.
24:33What, when I could come here and be a professional criminal?
24:36I'm not a criminal, Avery.
24:38A crook.
24:39They steal, we restore.
24:40They destroy, we repair.
24:41We'll give you the skills to beat criminals at their own game.
24:44Right now, you're good.
24:45With our help, you could be great.
24:48Or you could go back to being a nobody.
24:52You don't know what my life is.
24:53On the contrary, I know everything about you, right down to how much vinegar you like on your chips.
24:59Far too much, in my opinion.
25:01I know you have a deep sense of right and wrong,
25:03and I know that you long to save your grandmother from those despicable Merciers.
25:08But tell me this.
25:09How many pockets would you have to pick to buy that caravan by the sea?
25:12How much help would you be in a young offenders' institute?
25:14Because the next time you're arrested, it won't be Mr. Khan.
25:22My coin.
25:24Now!
25:28Please.
25:30Please.
25:35Well, I see I'm not going to change your mind.
25:39Perhaps you should call her.
25:41She'll be worried.
26:00Goodbye.
26:01Sir.
26:08Why didn't you mention this St. Jude's place?
26:13What happened so fast?
26:14I didn't have time to explain.
26:15Well, no, you don't have to.
26:17Mr. Lockett came to see me.
26:20Told me everything.
26:22How he persuaded the police not to press charges.
26:24Is how he runs a school that turns kids' lives around.
26:27No, that's not true.
26:28Oh, enough, Gabriel.
26:31No more lies.
26:33You found the box in your cupboard.
26:35Eight hundred quid.
26:37A stolen money.
26:38And to think that I fell for all that stuff about scratch cards.
26:41You must think I'm a little stupid.
26:42No.
26:43No, I just wanted to help.
26:44Help?
26:45This crew and everything.
26:47Grandma, listen.
26:48No.
26:48You, listen.
26:50You're the one good thing that's happened to me.
26:53The last thing I want is to see you go into some boarding school.
26:56But if they offer you a place, then you take it.
26:59For your future's sake.
27:00Now, what about your future?
27:06Today's crooked value is cheating.
27:09Remember, cheat.
27:10But never cheat your friends.
27:12Gabriel, wait up.
27:15You were serious then about leaving?
27:18I thought maybe it was a bluff for Edgar's benefit.
27:23I promised my grandmother I'd never steal again.
27:28She begged me to stay here.
27:30But staying here means learning to steal.
27:32Lying to her.
27:33This is Crookhaven, amigo.
27:36Nothing's as simple as right or wrong.
27:39There you go, see?
27:42The corner's not so bright in her.
27:44There you go, Amir.
27:45That gone solid for him.
27:48Best of luck now.
27:49You keep that, Chino.
27:51Come on.
27:52It's time to watch the baby Crooklings embarrass themselves.
27:55What does she mean?
27:55The Crooked Oak.
27:57Trust me, you don't want to miss this.
27:59You can get the boat later if you still want to leave.
28:10What do you want, sticking around?
28:12I made up my mind.
28:13Well, you'd better decide soon.
28:15Because once your arrow hits the Oak,
28:17there's no going back.
28:19For what it's worth,
28:22I really hope you stay.
28:24You're right, Sarkozy, right?
28:29Oh, God.
28:30Look, look.
28:31Isn't that?
28:32Amir D'Wan.
28:33When did she arrive?
28:36Never thought she had the nerve to show her face.
28:38Her brother is a traitor.
28:40Shock him.
28:41Crooklings!
28:43My name is Mr. Velasquez.
28:45It's my honor to teach skullduggery.
28:47You stand where I once stood at the start of a long and crooked path.
28:54Once you become Crooklings, you will be bound by our sacred values.
28:59Steal, but not from those in need.
29:03Cheat, but never cheat your friends.
29:06Lie, but never to yourself.
29:10From this moment, you are all in competition for this.
29:15The Crooked Cup.
29:17A chance to have your name engraved beside the greatest crooks in history.
29:24For a young crook, there is no higher honor.
29:27No greater way to announce yourself as a talent to be ready.
29:30Every Delacoon has won it since 1910.
29:32That's how I've been practicing five years for this.
29:34I won't let him down.
29:35It's yours to lose, Edgar.
29:36Last holidays, I helped put some bad people away.
29:40Never known if you didn't like it.
29:41To this day, each new crookling accepts their place by firing a silver-tipped arrow with your name inscribed upon
29:55it.
29:56How are we supposed to bust out some mother tree skills?
29:59The motive governs the means, Gabriel.
30:02It's not about what you do.
30:06It's about why.
30:07And whoever comes closest to hitting Ezekiel's original arrowhead will win themselves five fucking points.
30:16But, because we are a soft touch, we will allow you the best of two.
30:21So, crooklings, step forward and collect your arrow.
30:28Good luck.
30:29May your aim be true.
30:32May your aim be true.
31:02After that shockingly poor start, let's hope the next two crooklings fare better.
31:09Hey, at least we have a tree.
31:11Our next two crooklings are Penelope Lockett.
31:17Lockett.
31:18As in?
31:19As in?
31:20The headmaster's daughter.
31:22And Gabriel Avery.
31:24So, we have a merit versus a legacy.
31:28I thought we agreed.
31:28Raw talent needs nurturing, Diego.
31:31This is the best place for him.
31:33Let's be honest.
31:34It's you against me.
31:35Merit doesn't stand a chance.
31:37Neither do you, Edgar.
31:38Please, step forward.
31:45Ever held a bow before?
31:46How hard can it be?
31:51Make me proud.
31:52When have I not?
32:08Penelope, please, retrieve your arrow.
32:13She's good.
32:15And I'm better.
32:27She's good.
32:34Don't stop.
32:38Has he scrounged?
32:43Let's be honest.
32:44I don't know.
32:45So great.
32:55¡Suscríbete al canal!
33:28¡Suscríbete al canal!
33:46¡Brava, Gia!
33:47A remarkable first shot, especially for a merit.
33:51A little wide.
33:52That's a breeze.
33:54I'll recalibrate.
33:55You can't get beat by a medic.
34:14You can't get beat by a medic.
34:16Everyone, everyone, everyone.
34:17Everyone, everyone, everyone.
34:31What the hell, Duan?
34:33You were aiming right at her.
34:34I was lining up the target.
34:35You made me shoot when you barged into me.
34:37You didn't ever shoot someone on purpose.
34:39I guess the rumors about you are true.
34:41You're no legacy.
34:43Arrow.
34:44Bring me Gia's arrow.
34:45Stay where you are.
34:49Move, move.
34:56Okay, look at me.
34:56Look at me.
34:57Look at me.
34:58You okay?
34:59You okay?
35:00You sure?
35:00We'll go.
35:01Okay.
35:05I'm afraid after that unedifying spectacle, Amira has forfeited her term.
35:10Interfering with another crookling shot is strictly forbidden.
35:12I mean, you can't be serious.
35:15Delacoon's the one who should be disqualified.
35:17He tried to shoot Gia.
35:19Amira's the one who saved her.
35:20Hey, don't be a bad sport, Gabriel.
35:22Just because your arrow barely hit the tree.
35:26It was an accident.
35:27Duan knocked into me.
35:50I believe our winner is Edgar Delacoon.
35:53I wouldn't be so sure.
35:57Meaning?
35:58Did you check the name on the arrow before you fired it?
36:06Mr. Lockett, sir, you can't...
36:10Mr. Lockett, sir, you can't...
36:22The name on the arrow is...
36:24Gabriel Avery.
36:29I want you to know your name is poison, and your presence is an insult.
36:34Guessing you're Edgar Delacoon, they warned me about you.
36:40The master.
36:43The rules state the arrow closest to the mark wins.
36:48This arrow has Gabriel Avery's name on it.
36:58Don't be a bad sport, Edgar.
37:00Just because your arrow barely hit the tree.
37:02That's not fair.
37:03He's making a mockery out of the crooked oak.
37:05How can you let him do this?
37:06He beat you.
37:07Deal with it.
37:13Oh, I'll deal with it.
37:17So you're staying?
37:20Looks that way.
37:23All it took was me almost getting shot.
37:30Good night, Brookhaven.
37:32Sweet dreams.
37:38Good night, Brookhaven.
38:14Another year begins, Caspian.
38:17Another class of eager young crooklings.
38:19Feet of brainwash.
38:21But...
38:22A word to the wise.
38:25There's a storm coming.
38:29A storm you can't escape.
38:32And you only have yourself to blame.
38:35So that's how it all began.
38:37I picked his pocket.
38:39He picked mine.
38:41I went to get my lucky coin back, and next thing I knew...
38:45I was a crookling.
38:47New tie.
38:49New jacket.
38:50New life.
38:54It felt like...
38:55Maybe my lucky coin had finally brought me some real luck.
39:00Except, of course, it wasn't luck that brought me here, was it?
39:03It was Caspian Lockett.
39:06And when your headmaster and everyone in your school is a crook...
39:11The first lesson you learn...
39:16Trust...
39:17No one.
39:20Where has Caspian started?
39:22You're not one of us.
39:24You don't belong here.
39:25I have to utterly humiliate him.
39:27I'm not here to make friends.
39:28I'm here to win.
39:29Game on.
39:30There's a storm...
39:32Coming.
39:34The Nameless.
39:36What's the Nameless?
39:37An enemy that hates everything Crookhaven stands for!
39:40You'll put the entire crooked network in danger!
39:43You will get out!
39:45They already have our blood on their hands.
39:47And they'll burn this place to the ground.
39:49Listen up, Lizards! We need your help!
39:51Who cleans, assemble!
39:53Leaving so soon.
39:56I thought I was here because I was good!
39:59This is Crookhaven.
40:00Everyone's hiding something.
40:07We're Crooks.
40:09Honest is overrated.
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