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00:28You
00:41You
01:08You
01:30You
02:06You
02:39You
02:40You
02:45You
02:58You
02:59You
02:59You
03:09I can't even taste my own tears
03:16Before I do and even shout a fastball inside
03:46You don't know what it means to me that you've all welcomed me into your family
03:51And I just want to say thank you
03:55And, um, nothing
03:58I just, I hope you can forgive me
04:04I don't really play with toys like this anymore
04:07I want a video camera
04:09A nice one
04:10Oh, well, I don't
04:12It was just more of a gesture
04:16Write an intercard instead
04:19This is actually a good idea
04:22This crate's stuck in the junk drawer
04:31Thanks
04:32Thanks
04:32Come over to the house
04:37Just want to go
04:38To my back
04:38I love you
04:41sapp дней
04:43All over there
04:45Oh, I want to go
04:46Oh, and not
04:50It's not
04:53It's not
04:54I want to go
04:56I want to go
04:58It's what hmm
05:13I'm sorry, man.
05:15Holy fuck.
05:26Hi.
05:27Who are you talking to?
05:29I'm just on hold with neurosurgery at Johns Hopkins.
05:32I talked to this guy at UCSF.
05:34He was like a total dick, but there's
05:35this world-renowned surgeon in Paris I'm going to try next.
05:37He's done a lot of promising new research.
05:39Why?
05:40To help my mom.
05:42Honey, I don't think that she's looking for help.
05:44You know what I realized?
05:45It's a brain tumor, you know?
05:46I think the tumor, it's like messing with her head.
05:51It's like clouding her judgment.
05:53You know, it just makes total sense.
05:55You know, she's doing fine.
05:57She seems like herself, except for this one insane decision she's made.
06:01And I just...
06:06She doesn't need to die.
06:09She needs the best neurosurgeon in the world.
06:12And I don't know why Jules isn't calling everyone he knows.
06:15Actually, wait, he might know someone who knows this doctor.
06:17Nikki, why don't you take a shower and get dressed?
06:18I'm in the middle of something right now.
06:20Nikki.
06:20This is important.
06:21This is the most important thing to me.
06:25What's supposed to put on the wedding?
06:30Are you serious?
06:31No, so you can focus on the most important thing to you.
06:34I didn't mean it like that.
06:37I don't mean it like that either.
06:38I mean that your mom dropped a huge bomb on you.
06:40And, yeah, it is more important than the wedding.
06:44And, I don't know, maybe we don't want to get married under these circumstances.
06:56Come here.
07:09Who's that?
07:10Hmm?
07:12Who's that little guy?
07:14Oh.
07:17This is my dumb apology for, like, tactlessly unearthing your family secret.
07:25And, we can have the wedding as planned this week.
07:28This doesn't change anything for us.
07:30Yeah.
07:33But, it does, like, it does change a lot.
07:41I'm not going to let it get in the way of our wedding.
07:47I'm with you.
07:50Really?
07:50I'm with you.
07:53Forever.
07:54Forever.
07:57Oh!
07:58Portia!
07:59Where's the dress?
07:59Needs to be altered.
08:00I have, like, 500 things I have to do.
08:02Nikki stopped touching her.
08:03And, the table man delivered eight tables.
08:05And, Nikki, stop.
08:06Ew, I'm helping.
08:06And, the caterer needs the menu to be finalized.
08:08Okay, let me help you.
08:10What?
08:11Let me help you.
08:13The dress isn't there.
08:15Nikki's suit isn't there.
08:16What else do you need?
08:19By the way, I haven't gotten to say thank you, Portia, for everything that-
08:23Oh, and I've had your card.
08:26You know, it's weird.
08:26I actually have to ask you something.
08:29You thought we were going to kill you?
08:31No offense, but that's kind of an insane conclusion to draw.
08:34Did someone try to kill you once or something?
08:36No.
08:37No.
08:37Then why did you think that?
08:39It's just how my brain works.
08:44Like, right now, I feel like there's someone standing behind this door.
09:01I Googled you, you know.
09:04It's like you don't even exist.
09:08No social media, no LinkedIn, not even like high school sports stats.
09:12Either you didn't play sports or you weren't very good.
09:14I was homeschooled actually, so I played the sport of like, trying not to be a total freak.
09:19But I don't think that it worked.
09:22Yeah, I'm like the opposite.
09:24I never thought anyone was trying to kill me.
09:32Whoa, when did all this happen?
09:35Hey.
09:35Hey.
09:35What is this?
09:37It's supposed to be live-edged cedar?
09:39These are like sticks.
09:41This is a tasteful wedding, not the Blair Witch Project.
09:44This is what you ordered.
09:45Rustic Beachwood.
09:46Rustic Beachwood?
09:47No.
09:48Look around you, man.
09:49I don't see a fucking beach.
09:50Um, the wedding theme is Forest of Love.
09:52Did I talk to Dominic?
09:53He does a new consult, so I have this work's been approved.
09:56You approved.
09:56Well, no.
09:57I didn't approve this.
09:58This is not my vision.
09:59Hey, Portia, come here.
10:00Look.
10:01I-I think that this-this is actually gonna look really nice.
10:05Yeah, it is, it is.
10:06They're gonna do that thing here and I think-
10:08I mean, they have a plan.
10:10You guys have a plan.
10:10Of course we have a plan.
10:12This stick goes there, that stick goes there.
10:14I'm not tipping him.
10:14It makes an arch.
10:16Portia, I think the flowers look really nice.
10:19I think that's gonna look nice, too.
10:20These aren't the flowers, Rachel.
10:24What?
10:26Well, they're fake.
10:27They're fake.
10:28The real ones come day up.
10:30Portia, that's crazy.
10:32These are-these are perfectly arranged.
10:34They're ready to go.
10:34Why don't we just use these?
10:37We obviously need real flowers, Rachel.
10:40Do you want your wedding to look like a hospital waiting room?
10:43God, I did this arrangement in advance so I could actually see it.
10:46You've always envisioned a winter wedding at Summer House.
10:49Went back and forth about the color scheme.
10:50Rust, sage, evergreen, and white.
10:52But there is just too much rust and not enough sage.
10:54Here, take these.
10:57I think it's-they look pretty perfect to me.
11:01Oh, well you can't be trusted with flowers.
11:03You brought white lilies, funeral flowers.
11:08And of course you didn't know, because apparently you grew up homeschooled in some ditch or something.
11:19No, I don't understand you at all.
11:22Who's gonna be your maid of honor?
11:23What's your walk song gonna be?
11:24Do you even have anyone to walk you down the aisle?
11:26It's okay, Portia.
11:26You really, you-
11:27No, Rachel, I-
11:28You don't have to worry about this stuff.
11:29I do have to worry about it.
11:31Because you're not worried about it and someone has to fucking worry about it.
11:33Okay.
11:39Okay.
11:40I will walk myself down the aisle.
11:44I don't know, I don't know what song yet.
11:47But I promise you, I will pick one.
11:52Okay?
11:54Will you be my maid of honor?
11:58Would you do that for me?
12:02The caterer called and they don't have everyone's final meal choice, so...
12:06Okay.
12:07Great, then I will ask everyone here what they want.
12:10What are the options?
12:11Chicken or fish?
12:12Okay. And veggie option?
12:13I will light you on fire.
12:22Come in.
12:24You can help me.
12:30Which do you think best captures this spirit?
12:39It's so cute.
12:43This one.
12:46Oh, I don't have one of you.
12:48Oh, no, don't worry.
12:49That's totally fine.
12:50Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
12:51Please, please, I don't-
12:52I don't want to- I don't want to deserve you.
12:53I just wanted to ask you if- if you wanted chicken or fish for the wedding?
13:00I want to be buried with my whole family.
13:04Okay.
13:14Do you want it?
13:16I'm- I'm getting rid of my attachment to all things.
13:19Thanks.
13:20Mm-hmm.
13:24Do you know where Dr. Cunningham is?
13:27He's probably in his dungeon working on the dog.
13:31Now that he's finished the grave, he needs something else to fixate on.
13:36Oh, and that's all right.
13:38That's how he wants to spend his last days with me.
13:48Can I ask you something?
13:51Do you think that everyone is dealing okay?
13:56I mean, with- with your death?
14:02Well, how could they be, huh?
14:06Well, you know, they could be talking to each other about it.
14:08They could be leaning on each other.
14:11They could be processing it all with you.
14:16I mean, there are doulas for these types of situations.
14:19Someone who can help you-
14:19Have you dealt with it?
14:23With what? With your death?
14:25With yours. Your mother's, I mean.
14:29My mother died before I knew her. There was nothing left to deal with.
14:38Well, I know that you grew up without a mother.
14:43But it would be naive to think that just because you didn't know your mother, you don't have to deal
14:47with all this.
14:48I mean, it doesn't go away if you close your eyes real tight.
14:51You didn't just suddenly exist. You came from somewhere. And when you die, you will leave somewhere behind.
15:03There was nothing left. You are what's left.
15:15I'll have both. Chicken and fish. Why not?
15:47Как蜂蜂蜂蜂蜂蜂蜂蜂蜂蜂蜂蜂.
15:50When I do be kissing you
15:55Tell me our love has just begun
16:02You're my only one
16:09Oh
16:12You shouldn't sleep in the bathtub
16:14I wasn't sleepy
16:16I had to give a girl CPR once
16:18In college I had to give her chest compressions and everything
16:21Yeah that is what CPR is
16:23The girl drowned Jules
16:25Guess how?
16:27She fell asleep in the bathtub
16:29I know you've told me that before
16:31I already know everything that's ever happened to you
16:35Do you wanna know why Rachel thought we were gonna kill her?
16:38I don't know
16:39She's got something fucky going on with her
16:42I bet you like that, don't you?
16:47You're sorry man
16:52Now what about me?
16:54Soaking quietly in a bathtub
16:56Make you go
16:57Let me come in here and stab Jules over and over again
17:00With a toothpick till he bleeds to death
17:03That's what it's like with you
17:06Portia's the one who told you about the sorry man
17:09Portia always has to be the center of attention
17:11Portia's the one who fucked everything up
17:13No one ever blames Portia for anything
17:18Whatever
17:20Whatever
17:20Whatever
17:22Whatever
17:23And it's not my fault
17:25Nikki gets off on damaged self-absorbed girls
17:28He's a simp for girls who walk all over him
17:31He thinks he's fixing them
17:35I'm just trying to be at peace
17:38Why
17:39Are you disturbing my peace?
17:44It's bath time
17:45No
17:53No
17:55No
17:57No
17:57No
18:03No
18:08You used to be nicer
18:12Oh, baby, you want nice? You should have married the other one.
18:17But that's the thing, Nellie. You don't want nice.
18:21Because I hate to break it to you.
18:23You're not actually nice either.
18:26And you couldn't stand to watch Nikki take the punches.
18:29You want someone who punches back. It's true.
18:32Sometimes nice is nice.
18:34Well, I'm sometimes nice.
18:41What? Say it.
18:45Didn't we say that in our vows?
18:47That we'd always be honest, no matter what.
18:50Oh, we've really stuck to our vows, haven't we?
18:53Say it.
19:00Say it.
19:05Say it.
19:13Say it.
19:16Watch out on me.
19:23Try me.
19:31Oh, sorry. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Sorry. Sorry.
19:40No.
19:41Don't go. One moment.
19:57Okay.
19:58You want me to say it.
20:00Your mother will be gone in a month.
20:03And you haven't dealt with it.
20:05You've never really dealt with anything, have you?
20:08Not your last failed marriage.
20:10Not this jealous brother bullshit.
20:13And not your maybe fictitious, maybe real serial killer
20:15who's been haunting you since you were Jude's age.
20:18Which is exactly how old you are when you stop growing up.
20:20You need to deal with your shit.
20:23Yeah?
20:24Because things will start slipping away all around you.
20:29Are you who you want your son to be, Julian?
20:35Yes.
20:36What do you want?
20:37Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.
20:38I just...
20:39It's really stupid.
20:40I can...
20:41I didn't realize he was in the towel.
20:42That was really nice, what you did with the cake.
20:44Really nice.
20:44Nellie likes him nice.
20:46Ignore him.
20:46It's the key to a healthy marriage.
20:48It's actually stupid.
20:49The caterer just needs to know if you guys want chicken or fish for the wedding.
20:53Chicken?
20:53Are you still?
20:54Have you written your vows?
20:56Oh, no, not yet.
20:59Here's the key to a healthy marriage.
21:03In our vows, Nellie and I promise to always be honest.
21:06So, I mean it when I say, baby, sometimes I fantasize about hiring someone to kill you.
21:13Oh, babe.
21:17So even in your fantasies, you don't do anything yourself?
21:27What's the fish and how's the chicken prepared?
21:30I don't know.
21:31You don't know?
21:32I can't answer it until I have all the information.
21:34Don't be a dick.
21:35He'll have the fish.
21:40You should really write your vows.
21:46Sorry.
21:47Sorry.
21:50I'm looking at him.
21:52What's in here?
21:54Dude, I got you something.
21:56I think there's someone in here.
21:58Huh?
21:58I think there's someone in there.
22:01Hey, come on.
22:02It's okay.
22:03I know the feeling, but there's no one back there.
22:07Why would it be locked?
22:12See?
22:14I don't know, but sometimes it's better not to open a locked door because there might be something
22:20in there that's not meant for you.
22:21Hey, look.
22:24Hey.
22:27Yeah?
22:28I mean, it's not me or nice, but I was once considered you and nice, so let's go, buddy.
22:35That's something.
22:48She's not thinking clearly because of the brain tumor.
22:51You're just giving up.
22:52That's it.
22:52Throwing the towel.
22:54Sorry.
22:54On a 40-year marriage, on a human life, on mom's life, on your family.
22:59You're just, you're done.
23:01I'm not.
23:01You give up.
23:01I am not giving up, Miggy.
23:06In my marriage, we make decisions together.
23:09I'm not a witness to your mother's decision.
23:11I am a part of it.
23:12I'm standing by my wife.
23:16I am embracing my last moments with her, continuing a tradition that was established by her father.
23:21Sorry, by skinning a dog?
23:23Rachel.
23:29You got engaged.
23:34You called us.
23:36You didn't want to have a big wedding.
23:38You just wanted to do something here with the family.
23:41Your mother was happy.
23:43She didn't want to ruin your wedding, so she planned this for after your wedding.
23:48It is so difficult to get family together, and this is to be her final celebration.
23:52It is her dying wish.
23:55And you two are not going to ruin it for her.
23:58Understood?
23:58This involves all of us.
24:00It's not just her decision.
24:02Okay, how do I call a family meeting?
24:05A what?
24:06A family meeting, how do I call one?
24:08Can I do that?
24:10Again, I'm so sorry for my misunderstanding, and maybe I am totally out of line by doing
24:15this, but I imagine that close families like you can talk to each other about your feelings.
24:22I know that I'm new to the family dynamic, but I've realized that it was your plan to use
24:28our wedding as a surrogate living funeral, but because most of you haven't done much processing,
24:35the wedding has now become a highly pressurized distraction from what is really going on.
24:42And I think that maybe we should do something about it, or else we shouldn't have a wedding
24:51at all.
24:57It doesn't make sense to carry on like it's no big deal.
25:00Couching your death inside of our wedding without talking about it, it's not going to
25:04be what you want.
25:07What do you think?
25:08What do you think?
25:08Can we do something to process all of this?
25:10Can we...
25:11Can we try it?
25:13Yeah.
25:15Yeah, let's try it guys.
25:17I'm sorry, I don't understand what she's getting at.
25:19Are you suggesting you cancel the wedding because of our dying mother?
25:23Because that seems a little unfair.
25:25Okay.
25:26Good.
25:27Uh, no, I'm not saying that.
25:30I'm saying that I think that we need a forum for you to say what you feel ahead of the
25:34wedding
25:34so it's not a horrible disaster and you can all actually have some peace around it.
25:39And I think that was a good start.
25:41You're welcome.
25:41You want us to do family therapy led by you.
25:46No offense, but a stranger basically.
25:48Well, isn't that what a therapist is?
25:50A stranger?
25:51Are you a therapist?
25:52She's getting her doctorate.
25:54Oh, in what?
25:55Behavioral psychology.
25:56You're a therapist?
25:57No, I'm a behavioral psychologist.
25:59Almost.
26:00Have you studied your own behavior?
26:02Jules.
26:04Be respectful.
26:05I am being respectful.
26:08Well, what are we gonna do, Rachel?
26:10Sit in a circle and hold hands and cry?
26:13Well, that...
26:13That would be better than nothing.
26:16Yeah.
26:16Where are you getting your doctorate?
26:19U of I.
26:20Oh, I went to Northwestern.
26:23Cool.
26:24Yeah.
26:24So, is there something that you want to say to your mother before you no longer have the
26:27opportunity to?
26:30Um...
26:32Um...
26:36Go ahead.
26:44Uh...
26:48No.
26:59Okay.
27:00Okay.
27:07So, is there anything anyone wants to say to Mrs. Cunningham before she's no longer with us?
27:30Um...
27:30Why don't we...
27:31Why don't we do this?
27:32Why don't we...
27:33All take some time...
27:35Alone.
27:37Really...
27:37Really alone.
27:38Sit with yourself.
27:39Think about what you want to say or...
27:41Write it down or just be prepared to say it.
27:43Do what you need to do and then we can...
27:46We can all come back together.
27:47Yeah.
27:52That was good.
27:53Okay.
27:55Now...
27:56Can you come and leave?
27:58Yeah.
28:17That was more impressive than you realise.
28:19Oh, no.
28:20It's not.
28:20It's just very obvious that they're failing to cope.
28:24No, no.
28:25I meant stealing the spotlight from Queen V.
28:26Oh, no.
28:27I didn't steal any of the spotlight.
28:28You've only been here, what, like two days?
28:29And everyone's doing everything you ask.
28:32She's like...
28:34Sort of a narcissist.
28:36Isn't she?
28:37Sort of.
28:38Didn't she just turn your wedding into her funeral?
28:41Right.
28:43Yeah.
28:47What?
28:50You don't take compliments well.
28:52Sorry, what part of that was a compliment?
28:54When I said you were impressive.
28:55Oh, my God.
28:57That's...
28:58Well...
28:58Who does take compliments well?
29:00I take compliments well.
29:04Go ahead.
29:10I don't know.
29:11It's like kind of a...
29:13Bad omen to get married during a death ceremony, so...
29:16It's a good thing you're not superstitious then, isn't it?
29:18Yeah.
29:19Good thing.
29:20Good thing.
29:21Good thing I haven't also had this awful feeling ever since I got here that something bad is going to
29:24happen.
29:25Yeah, but this is a bad thing, isn't it?
29:27Victoria's death.
29:28No, it's...
29:29It's something else.
29:31The feeling hasn't...
29:33Gone away.
29:35Well, keep an eye out for other bad things.
29:40There's one.
29:49What?
29:50I was worried that you'd be, like, an evil bitch who hated me for marrying your ex, but you're not.
29:55Okay.
29:56You don't give compliments well either.
29:58You're welcome.
30:00So what the fuck are we gonna do with this?
30:06Sometimes it's easier to speak truthfully if you don't have to look someone in the eye.
30:13So...
30:13You will...
30:15Talk to them.
30:18We'll each go around and tell it how you feel, and it will absorb your pain and grief, and then
30:33we will release it.
30:38Okay.
30:39Who wants to go first?
30:41I can go.
30:48Victoria.
30:52You're an incredible woman.
30:54You are the Cunningham family, and you will leave a hole in this family that shouldn't be filled.
31:00Not only because it would be impossible, but because this is the end of an era, and it should be
31:07honored as one.
31:09Your presence, strength, and unwavering courage have shaped us in ways we will carry forever.
31:15Yeah.
31:18Um...
31:19I've always revered you and Dad, and your life together, and your marriage, and the way you devote yourselves to
31:36each other.
31:36And I always wanted to follow in your footsteps, and I hope I'm doing that, because I see the way
31:43that you protect each other, and you've taught me the value in understanding someone so well that you know how
31:51to shield them from pain.
31:53I know we haven't always seen eye to eye.
31:56I hope you love me for my flaws and missteps.
32:00I have found a way to love you for yours.
32:05I love you, Mom, and I'll miss you.
32:08The time we missed two days in Santorini because of my failure to admit that I'd been wrong.
32:20And missing your 32nd birthday for an inconsequential business trip, I am terribly, terribly sorry.
32:31I will make sure that my future children know you.
32:35I will make sure to keep family traditions alive.
32:39I will take care of Summer House.
32:41I will make sure you live on forever in our hearts, and in the hearts of those who knew you.
32:49I know that we only just met, and I'm very sorry to lose you.
32:57You've been such a great mother to Nikki.
32:59And, you know, I think it's true what you said about children absorbing their mothers and vice versa.
33:24It's the cake Rachel bought to say sorry for thinking we're a family of murderers.
33:31Nikki is so loving because of you.
33:35And he's so lucky that he had you and Dr. Cunningham to show him where he came from.
33:40And how to love.
33:42And how to be loved.
33:45Why, why is this door open?
34:17I'm so glad that Nikki absorbed that from you.
34:20And that he got to grow up with this unconditional love.
34:26I can't imagine what that's like.
34:31This is where Papa honors the dead animals.
34:34He says the dogs can see.
34:37What broken theIEF City, Jordan?
34:40What?
34:54Do you want to guide?
34:54Do you want to know he was this a life?
34:55Why, what can't you, OPA does it?
34:55What is this door open with the mirror area?
35:03Oh, my God.
35:41Oh, my God.
36:21Oh, my God.
36:23Oh, my God.
36:53Oh, my God.
36:56Oh, my God.
37:26Oh, my God.
38:17Oh, my God.
38:53Oh, my God.
38:56Oh, my God.
39:08Oh, my God.
39:40Oh, my God.
40:10Oh, my God.
40:40Oh, my God.
41:06Oh, my God.
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