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00:01Here?
00:06Here's to Joe Stalin's next stroke.
00:09Tinkety-tongue.
00:13Who was he?
00:15Victor.
00:15All met him before an air raid.
00:1841.
00:18It is true.
00:19I switched the glasses, he drank the poison meant for one of us.
00:23Nafia and Ruhia.
00:25We'd be ever so grateful if you'd just keep an eye on them.
00:28This was the third attempt on our life since we left New York.
00:32The first thing you must do is arrest that cocktail waiter.
00:35And you must bring in any others on the staff.
00:39Do you have a reservation?
00:40No, my wife does.
00:42Your wife?
00:45Time for a little chat.
00:47What does Jack know?
00:48My wife and I have an arrangement, as I knew his late father.
00:53Nothing more.
00:54And should we trust you?
00:56Well, I suppose you'll find out.
00:58When the next assassin comes.
01:23Hello again.
01:24Hello.
01:26Fizz.
01:27For them, my Brazil.
01:31Who is it?
01:32It's me.
01:51Champagne?
01:52I can put a seat in this car.
01:54We are.
01:58Through here.
02:01We do not order champagne.
02:06Ruhia.
02:21Ruhia.
02:25Ruhia.
02:26Ruhia.
02:29Vibha.
02:30Ruhia.
02:30Ruh.
02:31Ruhia.
02:34Ruhia.
02:34One more step and all.
02:40Ruhia.
02:47Well, let's all calm down, should we?
04:12This is a very, very regrettable incident, Miss.
04:16Edie Rattle.
04:17Miss Edie, we live under the constant threat of assassination.
04:20The black mantle of death hovers over us like the London fog.
04:24Sometimes we make mistakes out of fear.
04:26You must forgive us.
04:27Oh, you shouldn't forgive them.
04:29You should press charges.
04:30Don't tell me what to do, okay?
04:32I've had enough of it.
04:33I've simply had enough of it.
04:34We understand, dear.
04:36Do you?
04:37Because I've descended a ship that started with a pass and ended with me getting fired.
04:41Fired?
04:41Yeah, I've been handed my cards, haven't I?
04:43What?
04:44Why?
04:44What for?
04:45Because someone sabotaged the boilers, tipped linseed oil into them.
04:50Yeah, but why would they think that that's you?
04:51Because I have a motive.
04:53Mr. Klein gave me a mouthful for standing up to that bastard.
04:56And now I've been shot, really shot.
04:59What's that?
05:00Morphin tartrate.
05:01I'm not going to have you jabbing me like a bloody pincushion.
05:03It will ease your pain.
05:04Oh, Liv.
05:05And if you do think that I'm just going to hop on the night bus and say, oh, it must
05:09be beastly that your country hates your guts and you're forced to slum it out here in
05:12the Walsingham.
05:13Well, think again, ladies.
05:15No wonder you're so nervous around the working classes.
05:17You've done my lot to be.
05:20I'll have that morphine now.
05:25Ow!
05:27So, dear Rattle, what do you suggest?
05:31I'll stay here tonight in the royal suite.
05:33There are only two beds.
05:35Then I'll have the biggest.
05:36And I'll have breakfast in it.
05:38I think that's a very modest demand considering the bullets in the war.
05:41I know the importance of the rules of hospitality in your country.
05:44I've been reading up on them.
05:46That's right, Mr. Book.
05:47At home, we are obliged to take in those who need shelter.
05:51During the war, many British officers were parachuted into our territory.
05:55None were betrayed.
05:57I'll sleep on the sofa.
06:00Right.
06:02Now, which one of you is lending me your toothbrush?
06:15I'll get someone to come and have a look at this.
06:17It's good to see you, Jane.
06:30We lost him.
06:32We never really knew him.
06:34Of course, it was impossible to predict how he'd react, but I was hoping for...
06:37Sympathy.
06:38Understanding.
06:41That's just the way it is with some people.
06:43They get down on a thing when they don't know nothing about it.
06:47Huckleberry Finn?
06:48Top marks.
06:49You can sleep on the left.
06:51I like that, Edie.
06:53She's sharp.
06:54Sharp as her nibs.
06:55The princess.
06:58Busy day tomorrow.
07:00Bliss has arrested Ghazili.
07:02Oh?
07:03It's a mistake.
07:04So I suspect I'll spend the morning showing him why.
07:07Clever clogs.
07:08If the shoe fits.
07:10Oh, it's the Dynaric Alps, by the way.
07:12Eh?
07:13It's the Dynaric Alps, my love.
07:15Not the Carpavians.
07:16As I said.
07:18Clever clogs.
07:19Hm.
07:48Book.
07:50This way, Mr. Ghazili.
07:52The inspector's ready to see you now.
08:14Finish with that mug, Sergeant.
08:16Bagged and labelled, sir.
08:18We'll return it in due course.
08:19Take a seat.
08:25Are you going to charge me?
08:27Oh, there's plenty of time for that.
08:29I've said it all already.
08:30It's in my statement.
08:32Oh.
08:32Just one thing before we start.
08:35Mr. Book here will be joining us.
08:37He's a specialist.
08:39Mr. Ghazili, it's very important that you use this interview
08:42to tell us the truth.
08:43Because if you don't, I can't be held accountable
08:45for the consequences.
08:47We know about your affair with Edie Rattle.
08:50She's given us a statement.
08:52And in doing so, has given us a possible motive.
08:55A reason for you to kill Captain Orr.
08:58Because he made a pass at Edie.
09:01It must happen like three times a day.
09:05What business are you in exactly?
09:08The antiquarian book business.
09:11I've read the Kanoon of Scutari.
09:13Have you?
09:14I know it.
09:15Live by it?
09:16It's very important in my village.
09:20Let's start then.
09:23If I said we were going to give you the third degree,
09:25what would you expect?
09:27Kicking out by the bins?
09:28Snake in the grass.
09:29What did you say?
09:30Forget the third degree.
09:31Snake in the grass.
09:32Come on, I'm waiting.
09:37Vodka.
09:37At last.
09:39Creme de menthe, lime juice, lemonade.
09:43Where's my ice?
09:44It went in first.
09:45Are you shaking this drink?
09:48Come on, come on, Mr. Gazzilli.
09:50This is the waltzing.
09:51Am I shaking this drink?
09:52I'm stirring it.
09:53I'm stirring it.
09:53Atta boy.
09:54Atta boy.
09:55I know that.
09:57French vermouth, dry gin, grenadine,
10:00four dashes.
10:01Shaken.
10:02And what would you put in a pansy?
10:09And he said?
10:10No, no, no, Mr. Gazzilli.
10:12Look, I'm still on probation.
10:14I'm not an expert.
10:15I'd say you're not.
10:16But nor are you a murderer.
10:19What makes you say that?
10:21Because he left a dirty great fingerprint on the upper part of one of those glasses.
10:26And a good cocktail waiter, as well as knowing how to mix a third degree, always handles a rock glass
10:33lower down.
10:36You made the drink for the captain, which is when you left your fingerprint on his glass.
10:40But the drink was not deadly.
10:42I'm sorry if this sounds insulting, Mr. Gazzilli,
10:45but you have yet to acquire the skill to poison anyone in a crowded bar in plain sight.
10:50Particularly with just a few seconds between the inciting incident and the crime.
10:55I'm sure you'll get there.
10:56In fact, I go so far as to say you're already a model employee.
11:01You're going to write me a reference now, are you?
11:03Why not?
11:05How long have the princesses been in the hotel?
11:07Four days.
11:08And you'd already noticed they always reject the first drink.
11:11So you made it out of tap water.
11:15Yes.
11:16Some employers would promote a member of staff so concerned about wastage.
11:25Well, Mr. Gazzilli, seems like you can go and collect your things.
11:32Our friend here is checking out, Sergeant Morris.
11:35Very good, sir.
11:46Well, now what?
11:48Anyone could have got that hydrochloric acid into the drink.
11:52And Gazzilli was too clumsy to have done it.
11:55As I discovered late last night, the Kanoon of Scutari has very strict rules about hospitality.
12:01It's taboo to harm anyone you consider your guest.
12:05Captain Orr was Gazzilli's guest, strictly speaking, and the Kanoon is very strict.
12:09Did it tell you anything else useful?
12:13Oh, yes.
12:15Insult my wife in front of the headman of the village and you owe me a sheep.
12:19If my wife insults you, I owe you five.
12:26Well, I find it's usually best if people are just looking nice to each other.
13:11You were not in the army, were you?
13:13You know where I was.
13:15Well, no matter.
13:16Straight in your spine, perhaps?
13:18Eh, at the palace a line of soldiers would salute us just on our way to breakfast.
13:23Oh, lucky you.
13:24Heaven might have fallen.
13:26And back then we weren't always looking over our shoulders.
13:29We were at home with our own people.
13:32You, boy.
13:33You must fetch the inspector.
13:34Why? What's happened?
13:35Another threatening letter.
13:42They got you.
13:43No, no.
13:44They are always here.
13:45Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.
13:47Well, you've done all right.
13:49They ordered in.
13:51No less than I deserve.
13:52Sure enough.
13:54Balkan mix, apparently.
13:56Nice.
13:56See those little gold rings at the end there?
13:59I'm a capstone man myself.
14:01Weren't you supposed to bring me for that Bovril?
14:03Well, I thought you had everything you needed here.
14:08It's a bit rich for my blood.
14:16So where was Miss E.D. Rattle when the murder took place?
14:19Having a woodbine outside, according to her statement.
14:22Having already administered the poison?
14:24Meant for the princesses.
14:26According to my intelligence sources, she's a fully paid-up party member.
14:31Communist.
14:31Red as Lenin's combinations.
14:34What?
14:34So she might have wanted them dead?
14:35On behalf of the new ruling class of Scutari.
14:39Then there's the other sister, of course.
14:43Other sister?
14:44Oh, yes.
14:45There are three of them, Inspector.
14:48Three sisters.
14:51The kingdom divided.
14:54Exiled monarchs, I wonder.
14:58Anyway, Princess Sunia went over to the other side.
15:02So it could be her.
15:02Striking the blow for the work.
15:04It's my assassin and team of siblings.
15:06This is where we should be looking.
15:08In my opinion.
15:10Sorry.
15:15Oh, yes.
15:17You liked the ladies, didn't you, Captain Hall?
15:20That's not how I would have put it.
15:23Still, at least we have his home number now.
15:26No?
15:27No.
15:28Yes, this must be his wife, Sylvia.
15:30I don't know.
15:31She's the only one without a star rating.
15:34Oh.
15:35Yeah, well, there's another familiar name in there, too.
15:39Oh.
15:41As you say, sir.
15:42Oh.
15:44Impassionate Italian.
15:45Sort of crossed out.
15:46Still legible.
15:48What do you mean?
15:49Obvious, isn't it?
15:50Captain Hall didn't just like the ladies.
15:52He was a bit queer.
15:55What?
15:56You mean...
15:57He travelled, as it were, on the 38 bus and the 43?
16:01He met that Italian barman at the races and had relations.
16:06It's all there in black and white.
16:07Met at the races, eh?
16:09Ascot race course.
16:10There is entry after entry.
16:11What motive?
16:12Blackmail.
16:13Obviously.
16:14Captain Hall threatened to expose Barberini.
16:17Captain Hall's a married man.
16:18It's all a bit...
16:20It's a bit far-fetched.
16:22You never know we've married men, sir.
16:26What's your great theory, then?
16:29That would be telling, Sergeant.
16:31But speaking of Mrs. Orr, I do think someone should talk to her soon.
16:36I'll ask Trotty, if I may.
16:39Wives always know.
16:41Whatever husbands think.
16:43Message from that lad, Jack, sir.
16:46Princesses are requesting another audience.
16:54A Winston Churchill mask.
16:56No.
16:57An Auria flying helmet.
16:59A piccadilly jar filled entirely with toenail clippings.
17:03Oh.
17:04Yeah.
17:05It's not for the faint of heart, the life of a chambermaid.
17:09But my dad ran a pub in Bala, so...
17:13I've seen it all.
17:16And what about the murder?
17:19I know.
17:19I was outside, you see.
17:21You can't pin Victor Orr on me.
17:23I wasn't trying to.
17:25Honest.
17:26Pity I wasn't there, though.
17:28I would have liked to see that one go down.
17:32So you were saying.
17:34You got out of the clink, and then you went to work in a bookshop.
17:39Yeah.
17:40For Mr. Book?
17:42Yeah.
17:42And now you're working for the Scatari-Boyle family?
17:46Not for much longer, I don't reckon.
17:49I ain't much cop as a bodyguard.
17:53Got anything by Marx?
17:55Eh?
17:57In your bookshop.
17:59Das Kapital.
18:02Volume 4.
18:03Now you're talking.
18:05Hmm.
18:06So why'd you leave?
18:08I just don't think they're my sort of people.
18:10No?
18:11Takes all sorts, you know.
18:14As I say.
18:15The things I've seen in the Walsingham.
18:19Maybe it's time you expanded your horizons a bit, Sunshine.
18:23Let me know if you fancy that far for us sometime, yeah?
18:48So-called princesses, my gorge rises as I see you in the newspaper.
18:56Decadent bones draped in Madame de Baviers, which will soon drip with your filthy blood.
19:05Yes, I can see why you might feel discomfited.
19:08So, what will you do about it?
19:10My dear lady, why-
19:12You will address me by my proper title.
19:14Do forgive the inspector, your royal highness.
19:16The policeman is often a blunt tool rather than a diplomat.
19:19Perhaps I might-
19:20As I have said, this is the latest of many.
19:24Dripping with venom.
19:26Our enemy is their legion.
19:28Can they not let us rest?
19:30Is it not enough that we are forced to drag our weary bones around the world like phantoms?
19:36Yes, you speak of the canoon, of hospitality.
19:39But what are we to make of yours?
19:42What welcome do we receive in your famous London?
19:46Wretched food, wretched cold, a bodyguard who fails to guard.
19:50And now, this.
19:52I'll do what I can, given my limited resources.
20:20I'll do what I can, given my limited resources.
20:42I'll do what I can, given my limited resources.
20:59Yes, of course, and we're terribly sorry.
21:02Well, if that's the best you can do.
21:07Oh, Miss Raffle.
21:09Yes, Mr. Kind.
21:11I heard about the-
21:12That's one way of describing it.
21:14I'm okay, but I think I might indulge myself a bit more in the cream of society.
21:22As I've been fired, I can use the hotel as a guest instead.
21:26Meaning?
21:27Their royal highnesses.
21:29I'm to put everything in their account.
21:30Well, don't spend too much.
21:32What?
21:33Nothing.
21:33Um, Miss Rattle.
21:34Yes?
21:35Would you kindly come and see me after you've indulged yourself?
21:39I hope.
21:39Okay, Mr. Kind.
21:49E.D., can we talk?
21:54I do want to apologize for the quality of the service today.
21:57The heating is off, the menu is cold.
22:00I'm deeply sorry.
22:02Ismael, none of that is your fault.
22:05Yeah, I'm afraid it is.
22:06It was caused by the three bottles of linseed oil that I stole from your cupboard.
22:12But linseed oil is for polishing.
22:15I use it for my new oil posts and my dados.
22:18Yes, I know.
22:19But I poured it into the generator.
22:22I didn't poison Victor OED, but I did poison the hotel.
22:27I was so angry with myself, with that man, with this place.
22:33So I just thought I'd kill it.
22:37I'm deeply sorry.
22:39I shall confess everything to Mr. Kind, and you will not lose your job, E.D.
22:56You will not lose your job, E.D., and you will not lose your job, E.D., and you will
23:26not lose your job.
23:51You will not lose your job, E.D.
23:54You will not lose your job, E.D., and you will not lose your job.
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