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  • 17 hours ago
TEEN parents Lia (16) and Leland (18) are almost two years into raising their son, Anthony, and they have another baby on the way. At just 14, Lia fell pregnant for the first time and she admitted to Truly that it was a shock: "I was definitely scared, I was mad for pretty much the entire pregnancy. I never planned on having kids ever - I had different goals for my life, I was a competitive cheerleader." And whilst Leland had always wanted children, he was concerned about how he would support his family financially as an under-18 at the time. As he told Truly, he too found the sudden responsibility weighed heavy, "There is definitely a lot of stepping up and growing up that you don't want to do but you have to do - and you know you have to do it." With Anthony now 20 months old, the young parents still do not live together, which is a source of ongoing frustration. Leland lives with his grandparents and works two jobs to support his girlfriend and son. Lia lives with her mom, Samantha, and has made a makeshift bed for Anthony by taking the doors off her closet in her bedroom - where she also continues to do schoolwork alongside caring for Anthony. She and Leland plan to move in together soon, but for now Lia does everything from "the everyday diapers, the food, the baths, bed time, nap time - that's kind of my job." And when Lia moved to homeschooling, she became detached from her friendship group, who she no longer talks with, as they have "different lives" to her. Searching for an outlet and community, Lia started posting online about her experiences as a teen mom and was met with immediate backlash - ranging from people accusing her of "normalising kids having kids" to others questioning why the couple are having a second baby. And although Lia and Leland are able to shrug off the online negativity, things have not been plain sailing with family at home either. Lia's mom Samantha "wasn't very happy" when she learned that her daughter was pregnant the first time and their conversations have "always been super tense." So when Samantha arrives home from work today and Lia and Leland sit down with her for a heart-to-heart, will she be ready to throw her full support behind the young couple? Or is she still yet to come to terms with her daughter becoming a mom of two at 16, just three months out from Lia's due date?

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https://www.tiktok.com/@official.harper_family

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00:00I got pregnant at 14 and now I'm pregnant again at 16. I'm due in three
00:06months. It stopped normalizing kids having kids. Why would you even let that
00:11happen twice? Becoming teen parents was definitely a shock and we wasn't prepared.
00:16I was terrified to tell my mom I was pregnant. She wasn't very happy. It's not
00:20the life I wanted for you. It kind of felt like a slap in the face. What did
00:24you feel when I told you that we were pregnant the second time? Come here, baby.
00:29Come here. This is Anthony. He's 20 months old. Something like that. He's
00:37almost two. He likes to run around. He's kind of crazy. I am Leland. I am
00:44Anthony's father. I'm Leah and I am Anthony's mom. And how old were each of
00:51you when you had Anthony? I just turned 16 when Anthony was born. I was 14 when
00:56Anthony was born. I got pregnant with him right after I turned 14. So, I mean, young.
01:04How does a normal day start for you guys now? I'll get up with Anthony and make him
01:09breakfast and then we're pretty much just playing the rest of the day and doing
01:12different learning things. Our life as teen parents has been kind of odd. I mean,
01:16we don't live together. Not yet anyways. We're working on that. But he works. I take
01:21care of Anthony for the most part. I do the everyday diapers, the food, the baths,
01:28bedtime, nap time. That's kind of my job. I've got to stay up really late in general
01:34just to get everything done before I go to bed. So, then getting up at the same
01:37time as Anthony is kind of hard. But I won't go to bed until 1 or 2 in the
01:41morning. So, it's like, well, here we go. You know, I'm super tired. But other than
01:45that, it's been okay.
01:46Did you always plan to have children at a young age or?
01:50I never planned on having kids like ever. I had different goals for my life.
01:55I was a competitive cheerleader. So, that was kind of the whole goal is just to go as
02:00far as I could with that. I've always wanted a little one to teach them everything I know.
02:06And I've always wanted to have that father and son connection.
02:12How did you feel when you first found out that you guys are pregnant for the first time?
02:16When I first found out, I was nervous because obviously at a young age, you can't
02:20really get a job unless it's side jobs, mowing yards, doing that type of stuff.
02:25That was just my main fear is the money situation.
02:30I was kind of shocked. I was definitely scared. I was mad for pretty much the entire pregnancy.
02:37People said I was kind of mean, but I was, I was pretty upset.
02:44So, I sleep up here. I made him a little room in the closet for his bed to make a
02:50little extra room in here. You want to show him your bed? Go get in your bed.
02:55Then I've got a bed set up for the new baby too. It's set up just in case he comes
03:00before I move out.
03:01We learned back in October that we were expecting our second baby. I'm due in three months.
03:08What have you guys bought so far for the new baby?
03:11I mean, we've got a few outfits. This is my favorite one, I think, so far. It's got the little
03:16bears on it.
03:17I kind of just sell random stuff that I have to come up with money to buy different things for
03:23the babies.
03:23Do you guys have major worries or concerns having a second kid right now?
03:28Not being able to get into the house before he's born is like, that's been bugging me a lot.
03:32He lives with his grandparents and then, obviously, I live here with my mom.
03:37So, we're working on getting our own place and then moving into that.
03:41She really does not want to have a second one without me being there with her.
03:46What is the hardest thing about being teen parents?
03:48It's definitely not being able to be around each other 24-7.
03:52When she's hungry, I can't just, okay, I'll make you this.
03:56Or when she's too tired and can't deal with Anthony at the moment, I can't help 24-7 of the
04:02day.
04:05There is definitely a lot of stepping up and growing up that you kind of don't want to do what
04:11you have to and you know you have to do it.
04:13For me, some of the biggest changes have been not going out as much, like, at the house a lot,
04:17which is weird for me because I've always been one to, like, go hang out with everybody.
04:20My friends were all pretty supportive the entire time, but we don't really talk anymore.
04:24We just, we've got different lives.
04:26They're all super busy.
04:28We started posting content on social media.
04:31I had a lot of spare time, but just to kind of get our story out there and show that
04:34it's possible to do all these things.
04:36It's possible to just make it through, honestly.
04:40It was his idea.
04:41He wanted to post content and stuff.
04:43I was like, you know what?
04:43Why not?
04:44We'll just post stuff about our everyday lives or different things that we do.
04:47What's the response?
04:49A lot of negativity.
04:51There's a lot of mean people out in this world.
04:53This one says, stop normalizing kids having kids.
04:56I don't know where I'm normalizing that at, but okay.
05:00And I think a lot of people who just have, like, a general idea of, like, well, teens can't be
05:05parents because they're young and they're not going to be able to grow up and do it.
05:08Another one about no shame and no embarrassment could never be me.
05:12Being young when you're having kids, it's shameful.
05:14It is embarrassing at times, but you just got to kind of learn to grow off of that, I feel
05:19like, and ultimately just make the best of your life.
05:22So how do you feel when people judge you for being teen parents?
05:25We really don't care what they got to say, just as long as if we're doing part of our job,
05:30doing what we need to do to provide for our little one and tend to be little ones.
05:34Sometimes it gets to me a little bit, but I mean, ultimately I know what's true and what's not.
05:39So I know that we do our best to take care of him.
05:42Another baby, question mark, question mark, question mark.
05:45Why would you even let that happen twice?
05:48I don't know, that's kind of mean.
05:50But I feel like they can't see inside of this situation what everything's like.
05:54I mean, I can see where it's coming from, but at the same time, I think we can do it.
05:58So, it's okay.
06:02How did your families react when they first found out about the pregnancy?
06:06When I first told my mom about being pregnant at 14, I was in her car.
06:11I got in her car and I just handed her a pregnancy test.
06:13And she was just kind of like, okay, we have to call your dad.
06:16She wasn't very happy about it.
06:19How did you feel when I told you that I was pregnant for the first time?
06:23Scared.
06:24I was scared for you, just because I knew it was going to be a huge change and everything kind
06:30of flashes and it's not the life I wanted for you.
06:32Just as my mom had started to accept it, I found out that I was pregnant again.
06:37The conversations have always been super tense.
06:39A lot about how things are going to be, how everything's going to go, everything that I've got to do,
06:44every change that I have to make for it.
06:46It gets to be a lot sometimes.
06:49What did you feel like when I told you that we were pregnant the second time?
06:55Anger.
06:57Obviously.
06:58Because I screamed and yelled and...
07:02Cried.
07:02Cried, yeah.
07:04I guess I felt like the first time that I was, I had your back.
07:09And it kind of felt like a slap in the face to do it again.
07:18There's definitely been a lot of support coming from my mom.
07:21She took time off of work when Anthony was born to kind of be there and help me get into
07:26the swing of being a mom, taking care of everything.
07:28But she's trying to also push, like, you're going to have to do this on your own at some point
07:32too, so...
07:36I don't want to see you guys struggle, which I kind of foresee is going to be part of it,
07:40being such a young couple and young parents.
07:42But we're always here for you to fall back on if you need it.
07:45I know, Leland, your parents are always there, your mom's always there for help.
07:48So, I just want to see you guys do well.
07:51Looking back, are there any regrets from having kids so young?
07:55Yeah, there's a lot of regrets around having them young, but at the same time, maybe it's for the best
08:02in our situation.
08:03Maybe it calmed us down a little bit, probably put us on better paths.
08:07We've took in full responsibility.
08:09There was a lot of, you're not going to be able to make it, you won't have enough money, but
08:13it's definitely doable, you just gotta try.
08:15What have you guys learned about parenting and what do you think makes it good?
08:20Everybody's going to be different in the way that they parent their kids.
08:22Everybody's going to have different opinions on things.
08:24Ultimately, I think a good parent is just someone who tries for their kids, at least.
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