- 4 hours ago
The precinct hosts an open house that attracts only vagrants. Wojo and Harris try to get a lead on an arsonist. Barney's enthusiasm in moving back home is tempered by the hotel manager who refuses to refund him his upcoming month's rent.
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TVTranscript
00:06What do we have to have an open house for, anyway?
00:08We're not a school.
00:13There's a bunch of people traipsing in here asking questions.
00:16You know, we're trying to get some work done.
00:19Actually, the concept of an open house is quite sound and potentially beneficial.
00:24Uh, excuse me, I think I hear my tea.
00:30One of the main problems in police-community relations is that the police often seem remote.
00:35And thus, a little frightening to the general public.
00:38This will give them the opportunity to come in here, see how we work, where we work.
00:43Thus, alleviating their fears and correcting misconceptions.
00:49Well, I cleaned up the interrogation room.
00:51Sure, did you put away the whips?
00:54Sure, good move.
00:57You work, you sweat, you try and do your best, and you end up putting out donuts.
01:02Fifteen lousy bucks to feed a hundred people.
01:05And you, Levitt?
01:07Oh, you know, I'm in charge of the refreshments for this thing.
01:11Just, uh, laying out a little buffet for the guests.
01:14Just lovely.
01:15And I got some, uh, cocktail wieners, saltines and chips, peanut butter, horseradish dip, and a ball of Cheetos.
01:21Ah, no pate?
01:23Pate, what's that?
01:25Probably means the pate de foie gras.
01:29French delicacy made from goose liver.
01:32What is it, uh, kind of like spam?
01:35Pretty much.
01:38I gotta go back down there.
01:40All right.
01:42I'll be going out a little later.
01:43Maybe I'll pick up some of that pate.
01:45Should be next to the spam.
01:46Thanks.
01:50Well, precinct, Sergeant Dietrich.
01:52Ah, everything looks pretty good.
01:55Morning, gentlemen.
01:56Morning, Barn.
01:57Barn.
01:58Hey, what you got there?
02:01Oh, just some, uh, things.
02:04A couple of suits.
02:05Oh, you want to make a wardrobe change?
02:07No.
02:08I considered it.
02:10Want a cleaners?
02:12As a matter of fact, I'm, uh, moving out of my hotel room.
02:17To another hotel room?
02:19No.
02:23Uh, for everyone's information, I am, uh, moving back into my apartment.
02:27Oh, hey.
02:28Hey.
02:30All right.
02:31Miss Miller gonna be there?
02:33Yes.
02:34Great.
02:35All right.
02:38Well, look, uh, we got a lot of work to do, and it's gonna be a lot of people traipsing
02:41in and out, so, uh, let's get to it.
02:42Sure.
02:42Okay, wait a minute.
02:43I want to say one thing before, uh, that the whole time, you know, when, even when things
02:50were at their worst, I knew you guys were gonna get back together.
02:53Ah, so did I.
02:57Well, I appreciate your support over these last few weeks.
03:02May I say something?
03:05Sure.
03:05You got a fire down at Dock's.
03:07Oh, what, where?
03:08Warehouse in Pier 10.
03:09Another arson?
03:10Same area as last time.
03:11All right, you and Woj.
03:17You know, Barton, sometimes I wish I could carry all my wardrobe in just one hand.
03:23Maybe someday.
03:25Maybe someday.
03:46Bye.
03:49Bye.
03:54Bye.
04:02Bye.
04:05Bye.
04:37Oh, John Dietrich's still out, huh?
04:39Mm-hmm.
04:45Who's responsible for that?
04:47Love it.
04:51Uh, open house been, uh, going okay?
04:55Oh, I've been able to handle the crush pretty well so far.
04:59Nobody showed up.
05:00Mm-mm.
05:03Still early.
05:04Yeah.
05:07Maybe that's someone RSVP-ing.
05:10Welcome to the 12th.
05:13Sergeant Harris.
05:16Oh, uh, yeah.
05:17Just a moment.
05:18It's, uh, Mr. Sylvester returning your call.
05:22The assistant manager over at the hotel.
05:24Oh, yes, Mr. Sylvester.
05:26Um, uh, yes, I-I just called to, uh, to inform you that I am, uh, checking out today.
05:33I'll be, uh, I'll be dropping off the, uh, key a little later this afternoon.
05:36Uh, yes, one-one other thing, please.
05:38Uh, I-I've paid my bill for the entire month, so I'd appreciate it if you'd arrange to have the
05:43refund.
05:46Did I say something funny?
05:51No, sir, I was not informed, uh, regarding that policy.
05:55Look, Mr. Sylvester, this is-this is a significant amount of money.
05:59Yeah.
06:00Well, I would appreciate it if you would have the, uh, the manager call me, please.
06:04Yes, and-and you tell him that I have a certain amount of legal- hello? Hello?
06:11Lapping with you, not at you.
06:15Subtle difference.
06:17Put a lid on it, will ya?
06:18Come on, come on, come on, bring it in here.
06:20You are my servants.
06:21I don't understand why you people are doing this.
06:23It's irrational.
06:24We're psycho cops.
06:29This is Gregory Bickman.
06:31Dr. Bickman.
06:32We found him nosing around the pier, and, uh, he had no explanation for what he was doing there.
06:37I was doing research.
06:39He's a shrink.
06:40I am a doctor of psychiatry.
06:41Arson.
06:42Arson is what we in psychiatry call a societal ab reaction.
06:46Yeah, well, we don't.
06:47Uh, we don't.
06:51Doctor, I'm, uh, Captain Miller.
06:53How do you do?
06:54Doctor, we're-we're just laymen here, so, uh-
06:57An ab reaction is the releasing of repressed emotion by reliving, uh, in word or action the original traumatic situation.
07:04Exactly.
07:07It's a lucky guess.
07:09So, you see, I was there simply to observe the reactions and the behavior of people who set fires.
07:15Did you observe any?
07:17No.
07:18Unfortunately, I was the only one there.
07:22Unfortunately.
07:23And then when we came up to him, he started running.
07:26Flight is a universal response to the unknown.
07:29Right?
07:30What are you asking me?
07:33Doctor, I think under the circumstances we're gonna have to detain you for a while.
07:36No, no, no.
07:37I swear.
07:37I have nothing to do with the fire.
07:39Come on, have a seat, Doctor.
07:40Just-
07:40Why, am I being charged?
07:42Uh, Sergeant Borja Horowitz is just gonna take your statement, get some information.
07:45There's nothing that I can tell you.
07:48Even if I wanted to.
07:51Wait, I can't.
07:58Have a seat, Doctor, will you?
08:07You're in private practice, Doctor?
08:09Yes.
08:10I take it you have all different kinds of patients?
08:13Yes.
08:14Mental illness doesn't play favorites.
08:17I mean, uh, lawyers, teachers, housewives, and, uh, stockbrokers.
08:26Arsonists.
08:30Damn, he's perceptive.
08:33Arsonists.
08:39All right, Doctor.
08:40You see, uh, I've been treating this man for three months, and, uh, he has a psychosexual
08:46blockage, which- which he sublimates through fire setting.
08:49Now, you're certain he set this fire?
08:51Yes, this one, and five more before in the same area.
08:54So, we had a session this morning.
08:56I followed him down, but I was too late.
08:58Don't worry about it, Doctor.
08:59What's his name?
09:00I beg your pardon?
09:01His name.
09:02Oh, no.
09:03Oh, oh, I pass on that.
09:05You can't pass on that.
09:07Take it easy.
09:07Now, Captain, you understand there is a doctor-patient privilege here.
09:10And I understand it, and I respect it, but you must see that, uh, we're dealing here
09:14with criminal behavior.
09:15I'm afraid that is irrelevant from my point of view, Captain.
09:18Somebody could have got killed.
09:19Is that irrelevant?
09:21Believe me, the man is, uh, conscientious, which is a result of excessive mothering.
09:27Who cares?
09:27Uh, Doctor.
09:29Now, look, Doctor, we-
09:31You appreciate your dilemma, but you, you have to appreciate ours as well.
09:34I sympathize with you, Captain.
09:36I invoke confidentiality.
09:39That didn't work for Nixon, and it ain't gonna work for you.
09:42Oh, Joe.
09:44Why don't you, uh, check the, uh, arson files, see what you can come up with.
09:50I was a priest or something.
09:54Sergeant Dietrich will take your statement.
09:56Uh, I told you.
09:57No, no, no, no, nothing unethical.
09:58Just, uh, name, business address, that kind of thing.
10:01Yeah, but it's a very complex case.
10:03We'll confer over here.
10:11Anybody downstairs?
10:13Cops.
10:15I'm sure glad I didn't, uh, buy anything special for today.
10:20It's been after a half hour figuring out what to wear.
10:25Never enough time, mister.
10:33Must be getting near lunch.
10:35That dip is starting to look good to me.
10:49Are you?
10:51Hello?
10:54Here for the open house.
10:56Oh, yes.
10:57Uh, welcome.
10:58Welcome.
10:58I'm Captain Miller.
11:00Yeah.
11:01Uh, this is Sergeant Harris.
11:03Sergeant, uh, Wojciechowicz.
11:07And you are?
11:08Ray.
11:12Nice to meet you, Ray.
11:15Got food for anybody?
11:18Help yourself.
11:20Thanks.
11:25You guys are doing a wonderful job.
11:29You're too kind.
11:32That way you lock up the, uh...
11:34Sure is.
11:40If you have any other questions, feel free to ask them.
11:44Is that coffee fresh?
11:49Be my guest.
11:51Beautiful.
11:5712th Precinct, Wojciechowicz.
12:01Where?
12:04Did anybody get hurt?
12:08Okay, thanks.
12:10Barn?
12:11It's not a fire at Pier 11.
12:13Two in one day?
12:14I thought we were making progress.
12:16Yeah, well, two guys got stuck inside this time.
12:19They just barely got out.
12:21All right, Doctor.
12:22All right, now we have a direct threat to life.
12:25But this isn't like him, honestly.
12:27He's a very decent human being.
12:29I'm sure he's a wonderful guy, but...
12:31You know, if he keeps setting these fires,
12:32sooner or later, somebody's gonna wind up dead.
12:34I know that, but we're talking about a sacred trust.
12:38To which there are exceptions, am I not correct?
12:41That is true, but...
12:49Vincent Carew, Morris Hotel, I'm pretty sure.
12:56All right, he took water.
12:59Oh, God.
13:01Oh.
13:03Thank you, Doc.
13:13I guess I'll be going now.
13:18Glad you could drop in, Ray.
13:20Sure.
13:23Listen, you guys keep up the good work.
13:27We're 100% behind you.
13:30Thanks.
13:33Let's do it again.
13:35Real soon.
13:44Afternoon, sir.
13:45Love it.
13:45Just checking to be sure that the open house is going smoothly up here.
13:48Oh.
13:49Very smoothly.
13:51Oh, sir, I hope you don't mind if I take the liberty of saying how personally thrilled I am.
13:57About what?
13:58The resumption of your marital status.
14:01Levitt, my marital status has never changed.
14:04Sir, I didn't mean to imply that you weren't married, simply that for a period of time you had to
14:08do without the usual marital pleasures.
14:12Like home cooking.
14:13I mean, there's nothing like home cooking, right?
14:15Mm-hmm.
14:18I, uh, I'll freshen up the Cheetos, sir.
14:21Eh?
14:21You do.
14:24Don't be embarrassed, Captain.
14:27It's epidemic.
14:28What is?
14:30The breakup of the nuclear family.
14:33Oh, well, we were only, uh, we were only separated temporarily.
14:36As a matter of fact, I'm moving back in today.
14:38I wish you luck.
14:41Yeah, I, I suppose, uh, you people know better than anyone the difficulty of maintaining a relationship.
14:48I've been divorced five years.
14:50Oh, I, I was referring specifically.
14:52That's all right.
14:53All right.
14:54The more complex and frenetic this society becomes, the more I am beginning to doubt any kind of long-term
15:00relationship is possible.
15:03Well, but I mean, if two people realize that and are willing to maintain a certain respect.
15:08I wish someone had told my wife that.
15:12I mean, with her, it was all self-gratification.
15:14There was no concern with my aspirations or my needs at all.
15:18Sorry.
15:19Why aren't you on Central Park South like everyone else?
15:22That's what you used to say to me.
15:24Really?
15:28I certainly appreciate the advice.
15:29Sure.
15:33This is your detective room.
15:37Bunch of wonderful guys up here.
15:40Captain, I brought a couple of friends.
15:43Two of your biggest supporters.
15:48What do you do?
15:50The buffet's still open?
15:53Help yourself.
15:57Very authentic.
16:06Salt of the earth.
16:13All right.
16:14Rude.
16:15Geez.
16:15I'm gonna help you, Vincent.
16:16I'm your friend.
16:18Trust me, Vincent.
16:21You trust somebody and what do you get?
16:23Another day older and deeper in debt.
16:25Do you imagine that?
16:28Hello, Vincent.
16:29You told!
16:30I didn't want to, Vincent.
16:31You know that!
16:32Under the circumstances.
16:33You stink too!
16:35Transference.
16:37I got him coming out of his hotel.
16:40I got him coming out of his hotel.
16:40And he had this box of goodies with him.
16:43Kerosene.
16:44Lighter fluid.
16:45Heavy asbestos gloves.
16:47Matches.
16:48Blistex.
16:49I got tender lips.
16:50But I'm sure he told you that already.
16:52Of course I didn't.
16:53Why not?
16:53I bet you told him everything else by now.
16:55I did not!
16:56All about my sex hang-ups.
16:58Filthy dreams.
16:59How I stutter in front of beautiful women.
17:01That is not true, Vincent.
17:02Okay!
17:03All women!
17:04Vincent, would you please try to-
17:05Did he kill you in all my childhood?
17:07Now, stop it!
17:07No, believe me.
17:08I went by dead till I was 17!
17:11You're the arsonist.
17:14All right, all right, all right.
17:15Mr. Carew, just have a seat over here, please.
17:18Sergeant Wojciechowicz will get the information from you
17:21and then you'll be able to call your attorney.
17:24You know I can't talk on the phone.
17:28Oh, right.
17:29I forgot.
17:30Uh, we'll work something out.
17:34Uh, Dr. Bickman, uh,
17:37it really won't be necessary for you to stay any longer.
17:39We'll contact you if we need you.
17:41Oh?
17:42No, you're free to go.
17:45Am I really?
17:46Yes.
17:47Free.
17:49Free.
17:50I think that's an obsolete concept.
17:53Don't you?
17:56Just a moment.
17:57Barney?
17:59Uh...
18:00Excuse me.
18:01I'm not really free.
18:03Is any one of us really free anymore?
18:07As far as the police department is concerned,
18:11you're free.
18:14Literalist.
18:16Uh, it's Mr. Waldo, the manager at the Greenwich Hotel.
18:19Oh.
18:19This should be a good one.
18:23I better take this in my office.
18:26Oh, sure.
18:27Not in front of company.
18:33Date of birth?
18:34Uh, October 12th, 1948.
18:43I can save you the arithmetic.
18:46I stopped wetting the bed in 66.
18:48Nobody cares.
18:49Maybe not now.
18:53Occupation.
18:55Uh, assistant shipping clerk.
18:58Cameo brassiere company.
19:01He said it would be good for me.
19:03Told me I had to open up more.
19:04Reach out.
19:05All right, Vincent.
19:06Trust people.
19:06Now, Vincent.
19:07I am very sorry for what happened,
19:09but you are not the only person in this world with problems.
19:12I spell brassiere.
19:18Never mind, never mind.
19:20I'll abbreviate it.
19:21Vincent.
19:22Will you listen to me, please?
19:24I have fears and anxieties of my own.
19:26I have guilt of my own.
19:27God, I've got guilt of my own.
19:29It's just that I was making progress.
19:31I really felt like I was getting better.
19:33You were.
19:34You certainly were.
19:35I didn't tell you.
19:36But this girl at the office,
19:40I asked her out with me.
19:41Oh, Vincent, that's marvelous.
19:43She won't go, but I asked her.
19:45Oh, that's the important part.
19:47All right.
19:48Yes.
19:48It's your office, doc.
19:51Um, Vincent.
19:52I want you to keep seeing me.
19:54But I'm gonna be in jail, right?
19:56Hopefully.
19:57All right, then.
19:59I will come to you.
19:59Okay?
20:01I don't care.
20:02But I do.
20:03Do you mind?
20:05All right.
20:07Vincent, I will see you very soon.
20:10Goodbye.
20:13Oh, thank you, Sergeant.
20:14Don't worry, doc.
20:15I'll keep an eye on him.
20:16You know, uh, you have a very interesting way with people.
20:21Very analytical and detached.
20:23I think you could make a very excellent psychiatrist.
20:26No, no.
20:26I don't have the patience.
20:27Well, believe me, patience takes a good while to accumulate.
20:30But once you have it, you...
20:31See you back.
20:37Look, I only paid that bill in advance for your convenience, not mine.
20:43Mr. Waldo, the fact is, you're not gonna have any difficulty re-renting that room.
20:49Well, wait a minute.
20:50That means you're gonna be getting double rent?
20:54You guys do an awful lot of laughing down there, don't you?
21:00Look, uh...
21:01Hold the phone, will you?
21:02Just hold on.
21:04Can I help you?
21:06Oh, no, no.
21:07Just browsing.
21:09Go right ahead with what you're doing.
21:15Look, Mr. Waldo,
21:17I was hoping that as rational human beings...
21:22That is your final word?
21:26I should have known better than to check into a hotel that's been busted 25 times for prostitution.
21:32Never mind how I know.
21:34You just get ready for a letter from my lawyer.
21:37Hello? Hello?
21:42Excuse me!
21:44Nice material.
21:46All right, all right, all right.
21:47Out of here.
21:47Come on, let's get going.
21:48Come on. Sure.
21:49Come on, come on.
21:50Okay, everybody.
21:51Gentlemen, that's it.
21:53Open house is over.
21:54I thought it was until six.
21:56Very nice to meet you, but we've got a lot of work to do.
21:59I ain't finished my platter yet.
22:00Everybody out!
22:02Hey, sure. I mean, we was leaving anyway.
22:05Sorry if we made any trouble for you.
22:07I mean, we just thought open house meant, you know, open house.
22:12It's the way it is. Let's go.
22:16Listen.
22:17It was real nice meeting you guys.
22:20Keep shooting straight.
22:23Let's go.
22:25Wait a minute.
22:29Where, uh, where are you guys going now?
22:31Oh, we got places. Don't worry.
22:34Now, wait a minute, wait a minute.
22:39Here.
22:42What's that?
22:43It's key to a room at the Greenwich Hotel.
22:48Rent is paid till the end of the month.
22:50You guys can stay there.
22:52Oh, boy!
22:53That include room service?
22:56Whatever you can get.
23:03You, uh, sure you won't be needing this?
23:07No, that's all right. I've made other arrangements for a place to sleep.
23:11Okay.
23:14Wow.
23:16Take care of yourself.
23:19Nice to meet you, Ray.
23:22And, uh, see you next year.
23:35That was beautiful.
23:38Well, the, uh, the place was empty. I wasn't using it.
23:44I would have done exactly the same thing.
23:50I admire you, Captain.
23:52It isn't very often a person has a chance to do something for his fellow human beings
23:57and stick it to a hotel at the same time.
24:02Just putting it in perspective.
24:04Thank you, DJ.
24:09Pate!
24:14Must have been out of spam.
24:17lucky dude,
24:21Thank you, DJ.
24:26My genius.
24:29That's a good one.
24:32He's not right now.
24:33It's a good one.
24:33A good one.
24:42I love you.
24:43A good one.
24:47I love you.
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