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The Last Leg (2013) Season 34 Episode 10
Transcript
00:05Thank you for letting us be ourselves
00:07So don't mind me if I repeat myself
00:09Be simple, I'll be good for your health
00:11Keep them fine rhymes on the shelf
00:14Live my life like you just don't care
00:16Live but I believe it's never scared
00:19Rain and noise is the moment they fear
00:21Get up, still a beautiful idea
00:23Get up, throw your hands in the air
00:25Get up, you're shit
00:39Put on your Easter bonnet, make room for chocolate
00:42And cross your hot buns
00:43It's Friday, we're live and it's time for the last leg
00:47Tonight on the show, we'll hold space for the Artemis Moon mission
00:51Set the record straight about Iran
00:53And kick off our excitement at the upcoming World Cup
00:57Plus we'll be joined by comedian Josh Pugh
01:00TV legend Lorraine Kelly
01:01And online football sensation Steve Bracknell
01:04On the show that likes to let you know
01:07What's really behind the news
01:18G'day, I'm Adam Hills
01:21Welcome to The Last Leg
01:22The show that heard Marmite is going to be sold to an American company
01:25And thought some people will hate that deal
01:27But others will probably like it
01:29With me as always with the pride of Dartmoor, Josh Whittacombe
01:32And the man who's surprising his kids this Sunday
01:33With an Easter leg hunt
01:37Alex Brooker
01:45Loads of news to cover tonight
01:46I want to start with the news that OK we got this week from Carolyn
01:49Who said, is it OK that Josh likes to keep socks down his trousers?
01:54That's not Caroline of course, an ex-girlfriend
01:57Do you want to explain what that's like?
01:59Sorry?
02:00Do you want to explain what that's like?
02:01Oh yeah, sorry, yeah, I didn't hear what, I was laughing at a joke
02:03I didn't hear what you said
02:03Oh, the amount of times I've heard that
02:07So this week I was coming back from a tour show
02:10Yep
02:11The usual way I kind of de-stress after tour shows
02:14I sit in the back of the car and I have a bowl of shreddies
02:19From a Tupperware box
02:21You are rock and roll
02:23I've always said
02:24Yeah, Jerry Seinfeld called he wants his lifestyle back
02:28And then I put my hand on my leg and I was like
02:30That feels thick, that um
02:32No, come on
02:35Oh that's a shame
02:36The family show
02:38The material
02:39And then I was like
02:40There's something there
02:41And I put my hand
02:42Because obviously normally you'd go up
02:44But I was like, it's too
02:45So I put my
02:46I'll be honest, I ended my flies Adam
02:48Right
02:49Yeah
02:49And I put my hand in and I pulled out a sock
02:53Like that
02:55It didn't bounce with that amount of
02:58But
02:58The driver must have looked in his rear view mirror and thought
03:00Fuck me, he's enjoying them shreddies
03:04Or he thought he takes his socks off in a weird way
03:08So I've gone my whole day
03:10Yeah
03:11I've been with my family in the day
03:12And then I've done the whole gig
03:13With a sock in the gusset of my trousers
03:16That I hadn't known was there
03:18You didn't need the word gusset, did you?
03:19No, you didn't really
03:21I saw you flinch when I said gusset
03:24I always put my face in it then
03:26It's been down my trousers
03:27I love that you're going
03:28Oh, it was purely an accident
03:29There was a sock down my trousers
03:32There seemed to be an aubergine down there as well
03:34It wasn't like a rolled up football sock
03:36It was like just a normal sock
03:38Well look, we talked about this during the week
03:40And knowing this, I've got you an end of series present
03:42Yes?
03:42It's just there to your right
03:43If you'd like to open it up
03:44It's a pair of googly eyes that you can stick on
03:46Oh, that's nice
03:48That's nice
03:49So let me stick these on
03:50Yep
03:51Where do I stick this
03:52So if I was to stick one there
03:53What's my end of series present?
03:55Oh, I've got you some googly fingers
04:04So I just do it like this
04:09Oh, look
04:10There you go
04:11Hello
04:12Oh, amazing
04:13That is actually
04:14Do you know what?
04:15Hello
04:17What was it like in Josh's pants?
04:20I don't kiss and tell
04:21How was this gig?
04:25Do you know what?
04:26He absolutely smashed it
04:28And if you do want to go a good night out
04:30He's still on tour
04:33And let me be clear
04:34There is tickets available in Griffith
04:36Did he treat you well down there?
04:38Erm
04:39Yes
04:40I am
04:41Do you know what?
04:42What?
04:43Why have you got such a weird voice?
04:46Which one of us
04:47Is that true?
04:49I feel like Kermit's getting a seat and desist letter out
04:53Alright, let's move on with the show
04:55Before we move on
04:56I don't normally say this
04:57But I do need to do up my flies
05:00So just carry on, Hilsey
05:01Okay
05:02We are live
05:03So send us any questions you want to ask us about the news
05:07Sorry
05:08I just pretended to catch my foreskin, sorry
05:11In much enough it was finally the bit of his body he lost
05:17Message us on Instagram
05:18The hashtags is it okay?
05:20WhatsApp the numbers
05:2207956175908
05:23Or scan the QR code on the screen
05:24For example, Ree said
05:25Is it okay that someone has made a break for it
05:27With 12 tons of Kit Kats?
05:30Yes, more than 400,000 Kit Kats went missing this week
05:33When a truck carrying the new range set off from central Italy
05:36But never reached its final destination in Poland
05:39The brand issues a statement saying it's not a stunt
05:41And asked consumers to scan barcodes to help them find the stolen chocolate
05:47I mean I don't know how that's going to help
05:48Most thieves will have melted them down by now
05:52Can I say how nice it is to do a story about missing fingers on this show
05:56And it's not to do with me
06:02News of the high sparked an online race
06:04Other companies issued their own statements like this cheeky post from Domino's
06:07Said we would like to share our thoughts and condolences with Kit Kat
06:10Following their recent sad news
06:11On a completely unrelated note
06:13We're pleased to announce we'll now be selling a new Kit Kat pizza
06:18Yes
06:20You know how they can find the thieves
06:22How?
06:23Don't you?
06:23Just get a bounty hunter
06:25Oh lovely
06:28Lovely
06:28You know what?
06:32That is not my kind of humour
06:37Unsurprisingly Domino's started a chain reaction
06:39That led to this amusing post from Ryanair
06:44So I've got a lot of questions about that
06:46Firstly why has the plane taken a bite out of one end of the Kit Kat
06:49Then put the other end in its mouth
06:51And also why are there five fingers?
06:55Which is a question we often ask on this show
06:58Alright let's get into the big story now
07:00And as fuel prices continue to rise
07:01Stock markets continue to fall
07:03Catherine said
07:04Is it okay that NASA have finally launched the new mission to the moon?
07:08Yes it is
07:08We all need something different and happier to lighten the world at the moment
07:11Yes Catherine
07:12The American government proved they can do something right this week
07:15As NASA launched a mission to the moon
07:18The first time they did this was in 1968
07:20When America led an ill-advised war in Vietnam
07:23Which had no exit strategy and ultimately made a mess of the region
07:27Thankfully this time things are different
07:30The ten day mission will take astronauts around the moon
07:33As they look for a location to build a potential base from which to explore Mars
07:36Not so much a place in the sun as a place on the dark side of the moon
07:40I stayed up and watched this
07:42You did
07:42I was so excited about it on Wednesday night
07:44Did you guys watch it?
07:45Well you remember the first one of course
07:49Sorry
07:50Sorry
07:51So close but not quite
07:54No I didn't
07:55Did you watch it?
07:57I think it's bad at how jaded I am
08:00And how jaded we are as a generation
08:02Yeah
08:03That in the
08:041969 was it?
08:05People stayed up and watched it
08:06Yeah
08:07And I watched it
08:08The next day
08:09On my phone
08:11While having a piss
08:14I watched it
08:15I watched it on my phone
08:15Well what I love most is the next
08:17The next thing it took me to on the algorithm
08:19Was just more dash cam footage
08:22Is everyone going to go from that to someone having a rocket cut them up
08:25What I love most about this story
08:27Yeah
08:27Is it's Easter weekend
08:29And it's quicker and easier for those astronauts to go round the moon and back
08:33Than what it is to get a train from London to Manchester Piccadilly
08:43And look there's a lot to be cynical about in the world right now but it's nice to know the
08:46launch of a rocket can still reduce a professional journalist to tears of joy
08:49Here's the incredible moment the BBC science editor Rebecca Morell was blown away by the launch almost literally
08:57Oh my goodness
08:58Oh my goodness
09:04Oh my goodness
09:07That is spectacular
09:09It's not just what you see and you hear the rocket lifts off
09:13You can actually feel the force of it through your body
09:17This is the most powerful rocket that NASA has ever built
09:23Oh my goodness
09:26That is amazing
09:27It is amazing
09:28That's what I was like when I saw the Backstreet Boys in Vegas
09:34I mean a British reporter hasn't been that excited by a piece of machinery since this energetic clip
09:41Holy shit
09:47Oh my god
09:52That's like you when you open your Tupperware boxes
09:56There's one of them standing under the rocket blast that's actually quite distressing
10:01Look some of the stats around this launch are incredible the rocket known as Artemis 2 was the same height
10:06as Big Ben
10:07The core stage of liftoff burnt through 2.8 million liters of propellant
10:11And it will end up traveling the furthest from earth that any human has ever been
10:15I read that but also basically what NASA kind of the way they've explained the route is taking is they
10:20basically said
10:21It's gonna take the same a similar trajectory as Apollo 13. It's like don't use that as the example
10:28Just going to the astronauts well the good news is Tom Hanks has already signed up to play you
10:34It's gonna land in a similar place to the Titanic I think
10:40And look credit where credit's due when Donald Trump came into office
10:43He signed an executive order calling for Americans to return to the moon by the end of 2028
10:47So it must be kind of conflicting for the US president because on the one hand America is exploring space
10:51again
10:52But it's also the most diverse NASA crew to ever leave Earth's orbit
10:56It features the first woman and the first person of color to travel to the moon
11:01Now that I say that it sounds like it might be a trap
11:05Considering the third astronauts Canadian if the force one's trans this might be the most elaborate deportation ever
11:13What's tricky for NASA is that due to Trump's ban on mentioning diversity
11:16They can't make a big deal about the first person of color all the first woman to fly to the
11:21moon
11:21They have to call them the first person who's allowed to fist bump Obama
11:25And the first person who never likes the temperature of any room
11:29When's the first sock going to the moon?
11:34Are we liking this character, or is it running?
11:36No, no, no, no, keep it on.
11:40Every now and again I see something that makes me glad I don't have big hands, and this is...
11:48The ultimate indignity for a government that's critical of inclusion is that the area between
11:52the Earth's orbit and the moon is called Cislunar Space.
11:55And the operation they pulled off last night was called a Translunar Injection.
12:00I mean the only thing that would make it worse is if they were traveling in the starship they them
12:04to prize
12:06And not only is there an african-american man on board Victor Glover is the pilot
12:10Look it says a lot about the state of America that it's the only journey he can make without the
12:14risk of being pulled over
12:19By the way Victor Glover's call sign is Ike Ike which stands for I know everything
12:23But does he know he's an embarrassing dad because this gorgeous family photo is giving cringe
12:31That's actually his living room and what he's done is he's just been wearing the suit since he got the
12:36job
12:36That's why I like to think he's just been in the house just going
12:41Common Victor you making the kids late for school
12:44It looks like he's the only one who remembered World Book Day
12:52Not often you can create history and be a full kit wanker
12:56They are creating history. I genuinely got chills
12:59When this emotional final send-off was given to the astronauts
13:03On this historic mission you take with you the heart of this Artemis team
13:08The daring spirit of the American people and our partners across the globe and the hopes and dreams of a
13:16new generation
13:18Good luck. Godspeed Artemis 2
13:22Let's go
13:24It's fine, but they never have any banter
13:28They're always trying to talk as if it's going to go on the light some sort of monument or something
13:32where I think they just don't have any workplace banter
13:35Like I'd love to hear just imagine doing the camera like five four fuck. What's that bit of melt? That's
13:40falling off the top three
13:42It's not coming out of the top. I only fuck it about the old one. Have a good one guys
13:47This was the emotive moment when each of the astronauts gave their final words
13:52Thank you charlie. This is victor. We are going for our families
13:58This is christina. We are going for our team mates
14:04This is jeremy. We are going for all humanity
14:09It's lovely, but you reckon the first two were like, I'll give it a rest jeremy
14:14Family teammates, you don't have to bring humanity into what you look at me. I'm doing this for humanity
14:21We have to spend ten days with this prick
14:24When I'm at work just go I'm doing blankety-blank for humanity
14:29I'm doing that for humanity
14:32I just think he's not doing it for humanity is it? He's not doing it for me
14:35If you want to do something for humanity like get McDonald's to bring back the McRib
14:41The crew will be in a cramped space the size of two small camper vans for ten days
14:45Passing around the moon on day six and there was a tense moment for the astronauts when a fault was
14:50found with the onboard toilet
14:51In fact, it was with the toilet fan. Oh, it was in fact because I just imagined like one of
14:56the astronauts just coming out
14:57I'll give that a couple of light years
15:01Would it be bad to crack a window?
15:03Is it worth it?
15:04Is it worth it?
15:06The toilet itself costs around 17 million dollars and comes with foot restraints and ear protectors
15:13Oh, I thought the 70 million was just for a plumber to do that call out
15:18The ear protectors are for the person on the toilet or the other people?
15:23The toilet makes such a loud noise because it's zero gravity it has to basically
15:28suck all the waste and and take it away so it makes a noise loud noise and you need ear
15:33protectors
15:33Oh
15:33I don't know why you need foot restraints my I'm assuming
15:38I'm assuming it's so that you don't I mean literally launch yourself across the room
15:46If it's I don't I don't want to speak for everyone but if it's providing that much propulsion for other
15:51people
15:52I'm doing it wrong
15:54But I mean it's zero gravity it can't it's got a I mean
15:57What happens when you fart in space like you can't hide it if you've just shot across the room?
16:06That one was for humanity
16:10The toilet is a step up from past Apollo missions which saw astronauts taping a bag to their own buttocks
16:17Jesus Christ
16:18Oh my god
16:19That moonwalk feels a bit different now
16:21Neil Armstrong with a bag take to his ass up
16:25One small bag for man
16:27One giant man for piss
16:29One giant man, one giant bag
16:32There was a famous line uttered on board Apollo 10 and this is a direct quote give me a napkin
16:37quick
16:37There's a turd floating through the air
16:41Why have they got napkins up in the first place for fine dining?
16:45I hate to catch turds probably
16:48Why else would you use a napkin?
16:50Is that why they give me them a prat?
16:52The astronauts were interviewed overnight and they explained how they sleep in this fascinating clip
16:59Sleeping here is it's actually sort of comical
17:01Christina has been sleeping heads down in the middle of the vehicle kind of like a bat suspended from our
17:07docking tunnel
17:07Victor's been up where Jeremy is right now
17:10He's got a nice little nook wedged in there
17:12And then Jeremy has been stretched out on seat one and I've been sleeping under under the displays just in
17:18case anything goes wrong
17:19It's it's more comfortable than you would think
17:21And it's it's nice. It's nice to sleep in weightlessness again
17:24Every time I was dozing off last night
17:26I had that image that I was tripping off a curb and I was waking myself up
17:30So my body's getting re-acclimated
17:32It's been a few years since I've been up here
17:34I was hoping when he got to himself he goes
17:36And I sleep naked
17:41Hey what's my bollocks doing? Zero gravity
17:46Before the trip crew member Reid Wiseman said quote
17:48There are definitely going to be things by day six, seven, eight, nine
17:51That we're like man all right I need a little space and I can't get any right now
17:55And then said like clicking a pen cap can annoy somebody over ten days in a small capsule
17:59Which begs the question what would we be like in space?
18:02Imagine him trying to dodge loads of floating legs
18:06Gay sex the socks just floats out of my trousers
18:10I like the idea of you going Alex we can't the radio we're not we're not able to get back
18:15to Hoosie
18:15It's like no sorry mate I changed it to Kishtry earlier
18:19I like the idea you've waited 21 years for Arsenal to win the league and then you're trapped in space
18:25Alright let's move on
18:27No Josh has already made that joke move on
18:29Thank you
18:30No I think it's fair to say the mission to the moon has brought out the child in all of
18:33us
18:33Sorry I was going to make a joke Josh had already done it and I was like
18:36Well there's no point doing the same sock joke again
18:39The only difference is I was going to do your impersonation
18:41I was going to be a little bit of sock down here
18:44In fact I was doing the voice as well
18:47NASA even had an initiative in which members of the public could send their names around the moon on an
18:52SD card
18:53So you sign up and they take an SD card and they take it around the moon
18:57Your name goes around the moon
18:58They even put out a boarding pass that looked like this
19:01Now we know that's what it looks like because one member of our production crew actually did it for her
19:06and her kids
19:07And her seven year old is still pissed off that she's not actually going to the moon for Easter
19:14It's a mate when you look into what they're actually doing it's amazing because the precision needed to do what
19:19they're doing is absolutely remarkable
19:21Have a look at this fascinating clip
19:22It shows the magnitude of trying to coordinate a rocket from Earth that loops around a moving target
19:29Okay, so there's the rocket going around Earth it heads towards where the moon should be
19:33It hasn't come into shot yet because it's orbiting the Earth here it comes
19:37How close is that?
19:39Whoa
19:40These astronauts are basically combining physics, chemistry, mathematics and darts
19:46The way it looked is it kind of looked like you know when like your uber driver takes a really
19:50long route home
19:52You just go you've got ways mate
19:55Is he doing another drop off before me?
19:57It's almost impossible to put into words what they're managing to achieve
20:00But I think the final word should go to this excitable boy in America who managed to sum it all
20:05up beautifully
20:07Why do you want to be here? Why do you love space? Why do you love being a part of
20:12history?
20:13We're going back to the frickin moon that's why
20:17Pretty much says it all
20:19Let's welcome tonight's guest but let's do it with another special guest Josh
20:22Oh do you want me to do it? Okay
20:26She's a telly legend he's a comedy star but I'm a sock so I've heard of neither of them
20:31It's Lorraine Kelly and Josh Pugh
20:33Thank you
20:46Hello you both
20:50Just for no apparent reason but we've got plenty does anyone want to kick it?
20:54No
20:57I'm scunnered with them I've eaten far too many of them
21:05Were you involved in the hoist?
21:07I cannot possibly comment on that
21:09Maybe
21:10Did you both follow the moon mission? What did you think of it?
21:13Oh my god it's so exciting
21:14So exciting
21:15What do you think?
21:16You're not that excited?
21:17I'm not that excited
21:18I'm so excited
21:19With astronauts if you want to go up fair enough and all that but
21:23It's when they try and make up they're doing it for us
21:25But for all humanity or you know mankind we're not bothered lads
21:29No one's asking you to go up there
21:33I think it's just be honest you want to go on a rocket
21:35That's where you're going
21:36Yeah
21:37You want to go wee into the sky
21:39Wee!
21:40They had bother with the wees and the sky didn't they
21:42And you two cheeky monkeys I actually saw the original moon landing
21:47I was 10 and watched it with my dad
21:48Were you?
21:49No Lorraine
21:50I know
21:50I know
21:51Oh my word
21:52It was the best thing
21:54No Lorraine
21:56Because you were making a joke and then it was
21:58Oh but it's the sock
22:00No Lorraine no
22:02I love the sock
22:03I'm very very very into the sock
22:05So would you go into space Lorraine?
22:07Would I go if you told me no I would be away
22:09Well can we finish the show first?
22:11No it's amazing it's extraordinary
22:15The thing is the rockets they go from Florida though
22:18Yeah
22:18I just think there's better things to do in Florida
22:20You've got Animal Kingdom
22:23Sightly Lagoon
22:24You know Epcot
22:27There was
22:28I love the way people really got into it this week
22:30But I loved how watching various reporters around the world
22:33Cover the rocket launch
22:34Reminded everyone around the world of this classic clip
22:36You may have seen this
22:37James Burke
22:38It's often called the best timed piece of television ever
22:43And the two gases that he released
22:45From his particular version of a thermos flask
22:48The one lying on its side behind me now
22:50Were hydrogen and oxygen
22:57If you release those two gases into a confined space
23:00With a hole at the other end of it
23:02And mix them as you do so
23:03And then set light to them
23:06You get
23:08That
23:16The moon
23:18Wow
23:25It is incredible but how good would it have been if he'd have had a sock on his hand?
23:31Look walking and talking isn't always easy to do on television
23:35As this revealing clip of Lorraine shows
23:40She's a mother of three
23:44She's a mother of three
23:45I'll do that again
23:47Superwoman help me
23:48Help me
23:49Help me
23:50You alright?
23:50I can't train her
23:51I can't do that
23:58I can't do that
24:07I can't do that
24:08Take it away Lorraine
24:08Right
24:09Go on Lorraine
24:10Hopefully this will work
24:12Walking and talking on television
24:15Is harder than it looks
24:16It requires coordination
24:18Concentration
24:19And relaxation
24:20It's actually
24:21Quite a bit
24:23Of pressure
24:26Like the pressure that's applied to a foot pump when somebody jumps on it
24:30If that pressure is then transferred to a child's toy pointing towards the sky you get this
24:49That doesn't normally happen to me
25:00We'll have more Last Leg for you after the break as we come back down to earth with a look
25:04at what's going on in Iran
25:05We'll see you in a little bit
25:22Welcome back to Last Leg
25:23We're joined by Josh Pugh and Lorraine Kelly who is handing out chocolates to everyone in the audience
25:31Oh Lorraine before you go someone said is it okay that you didn't get a hug when you came out
25:34It wasn't intentional
25:35No, no, we all hugged already
25:38Didn't we? Backstage we hugged
25:39Don't tell them
25:40Was there someone that texted that in yourself?
25:44Honestly, I didn't get concerned by so many things
25:46Someone else said is it okay that someone left some anti-back spray on the desk at the beginning of
25:51the show
25:51Yes, that was an accident
25:54Mad Brummie said is it okay Trump broke the window and is now running away
25:57Look it's been a big week for the American president
26:00In fact, I'm going to do something now
26:01I'm going to read off a list of things Donald Trump said this week
26:03And I want you to tell me which one I've added as an April Fool's joke
26:09This week Donald Trump said that he hangs around with losers because it makes him feel better about himself
26:13Told an audience of Saudi investors they could ask him anything about sex
26:17Said he doesn't like museums and libraries so his library will be a hotel
26:21And claimed that a woman should have autonomy over her own body
26:25Yeah, you picked it, it was the last one right
26:30Can I just say anyone who says ask me anything about sex sounds like someone who's never done it
26:36As the war in Iran continues the Strait of Hamuz remains closed
26:38As President Trump took to Truth Social to tell Britain it should either buy its jet fuel from the US
26:44or quote
26:44Go get your own
26:46Not surprising from a guy who said when you're famous you can just grab them by the pussy
26:51Iran is now considering placing a toll on any ships passing through the Strait of Hamuz
26:54In what one commentator described as an ayatoll booth
27:01What do we think of Donald Trump saying we should get our own oil?
27:04Well, I think we just fight back. Mm-hmm
27:06We just choose British products. You should get your own hobnobs
27:11Do you know what Trump? Get your own ambrosia cream dry
27:16This side? You guys?
27:18It's just like
27:19The way Trump speaks to Britain
27:21It's like he's like a lad trying to get his mate to do something stupid all the time
27:26Yeah
27:26Like set fire to the farts or something
27:28The old you would have done it
27:29The old you, she's changed you
27:31The old you would have done it
27:32Okay, then I'll do it
27:34He's a kid man, he's ridiculous
27:35It's ridiculous
27:36And look at this
27:37Oh yeah, he's blaming us
27:38This is mad
27:39Like we didn't have
27:40He's the one who went and started it
27:41Yeah, yeah
27:42He's having a go at us
27:43And it's basically like what you're saying is
27:45Why aren't you doing anything about these pants off shitting that I'm wearing?
27:50And look at this one country that seems to be doing well out of the crisis
27:53It's Russia
27:54Because just as their war effort was starting to run out of money
27:57Donald Trump eased sanctions on Russian oil
27:59The price of which has now gone through the roof
28:02So the Russian economy is now pulling in hundreds of millions of dollars a day
28:06Thanks to Donald Trump
28:07So it turns out he is good for the economy
28:10Just not Americans
28:12Trump also said this week he'd consider pulling the US out of NATO
28:15Saying, I always knew they were a paper tiger
28:17And then added, and Putin knows that too by the way
28:20Get a room
28:23A lot of countries around the world are now struggling to deal with the current energy crisis
28:26Sri Lanka have introduced a four-day working week
28:29News anchors in Thailand took off their jackets on air
28:32And their government have told officials to wear short-sleeved shirts without neckties
28:36But have a look at Bangkok's weather for the next week
28:40It's like 37... they should be wearing short sleeves anyway
28:45Are you guys worried about the energy crisis?
28:48I mean, anything with crisis in
28:50It gets my alarm bells ringing
28:51Yeah
28:57He knows things
28:58He knows
28:59Good man
29:00Mental health, Cuban Missile
29:02Yeah
29:04Cost of living? Cost of living crisis? All of them
29:06One woman was spotted filling
29:08Time crisis
29:10One woman was spotted filling Sainsbury's bags with petrol
29:12And storing them in the boot of her car
29:15Sainsbury's bags
29:16That's the unbelievable image
29:17I think putting petrol in a plastic bag really shows where you stand on climate change
29:26F**k you, Grafenberg
29:29Gukas said, is it okay? The King's visit to the US is going to be very awkward
29:32Yeah, so this week it was confirmed the King and Queen's visit is going to take place next month
29:36Even though Trump spent a lot of this week slagging off Keir Starmer
29:39In fact, Trump even stated that the King would have backed him over the war in Iran
29:45His exact words were
29:46I like him
29:47I always liked him as a prince
29:48He's a good man
29:49A great representative for your country
29:50I think it would have taken a very different stand
29:52But he doesn't do that
29:54I mean he's a great gentleman
29:56I don't think Charles would have taken a different stand
29:58I don't think so either
29:59He talks to plants
30:00Yeah
30:01Poop
30:02His car runs on biofuels
30:05He's kind
30:05His favourite hobby is angling
30:07That's not a warmonger
30:08That's a fishmonger
30:12You've met the King, right?
30:13I have
30:13Is he the kind of guy that would be like
30:15Yeah, get in there
30:15No, he would not
30:17And the poor soul
30:18That has to go and sit and break bread with Trump
30:21I know he's met lots of despots
30:23Yeah, yeah, yeah
30:23In his life
30:24But I don't know how you get through that
30:26Do you just kind of sit there thinking
30:27Soon I can go home to Camilla
30:29And watch the racing with a gin and tonic
30:32Is that how you get through it?
30:33I don't know
30:34Well, is it true also
30:35The King can't really give an opinion on whether he'd go to war
30:37And Donald Trump knows that
30:39Of course he does
30:39So he's just
30:40He's just baiting
30:42They've got they've got mutual acquaintances
30:43His brother
30:49That's very true
30:57The Guardian's photo editor obviously had a little bit of fun this week
31:00It looked like they were purposely choosing photos that made the King look sceptical of Trump
31:04There was this one
31:07Are they passing drugs?
31:11Cheers for that Donald
31:12I really needed that perker
31:14And the Guardian also ran with this perfectly captured shot
31:19It looks like the King's going
31:21Ooh
31:21And he's just seeing Trump like zipper bollock in his zip
31:27He's only trying to get his sock out and all
31:29It looks like they're struggling for an answer on Celebrity Pointless
31:35Oh
31:36Ooh, you forgot to Captain Harland
31:37Ooh
31:40That actually is a photo of Charles talking to a plant
31:44The scramble for fuel is going to test all of us
31:45So Josh and Alex have come up with a way to get us prepared
31:48Yes, we have
31:49So Hills, basically as soon as we saw the image of a woman putting petrol in Sainsbury's bags
31:53So we basically thought this could fuel some hilarity
31:57Oh, yeah
31:57That's good
31:57Huh?
31:58Huh?
31:59Huh?
31:59And more to the point
32:00More to the point, pad out the show
32:04So we're going to put on
32:05We've got to make special petrol pump hats for this
32:08Oh shit
32:09And Alex has got a jingle made
32:11Would you like to cue the jingle, Alex?
32:13Let's play
32:19You've got to patrol with it
32:20You've got to feel your bag
32:27OK
32:33Here we are in our petrol pumps
32:36Me and Alex, two petrol pumps
32:38As you can see, I've got green on my face because I am unleaded
32:42Yes, and as you can see, I'm diesel so I've got a black hat on
32:46And I'm, do you know what actually, should we just continue with this?
32:52Don't want to get cancelled
32:54And I can tell you that this couldn't be more important, Josh
32:58Do you know why?
32:59Why?
32:59Because there's a very special prize on offer
33:02Oh
33:03Right, so here's what you have to do
33:05You have to get as much highly flammable petrol
33:08In shopping bags
33:10Across our tricky assault course
33:12From one end of the forecourt to the other
33:15It's that simple
33:16Hilsie, we ask you, it's the forecourt so please don't use your mobile
33:20Absolutely
33:21And Lorraine, please don't light up
33:23I don't know how
33:25OK, then let's talk you through the course
33:27First you must fill your bag at the petrol pump over there
33:30That'll have a street value of about eight grand at the moment
33:32And then you've got to negotiate your way through the mountain of charcoal boquettes
33:36And then slalom in and out of the caution wet floor signs
33:40Grab yourself a bunch of shitty flowers that you might be buying for a family member you don't like
33:45And then buy a scratch card from an under-motivated forecourt attendant
33:50Finally, pour your Romanian petrol into the car boot
33:53The person who fills their car boot with the most petrol is the winner, capisce?
33:59Yeah
33:59Cool
34:00Take your positions please
34:01Oh, thanks
34:01Over there
34:03There you go, let's kick it off for our contestants
34:05You go this side, I'll go this side
34:10Are you ready?
34:12Ready
34:12Three
34:12Two
34:13One
34:14Pump it
34:16Here we go
34:17They're pumping away now
34:18Right, who's you fancy to win this, Alex?
34:21I think Hilsie's struggling already
34:23He's not having this
34:24He seems like Lorraine's not messing about
34:25Hey, Lorraine's got this
34:27He's worked in a petrol station before
34:30Lorraine feels like someone who's siphoned petrol with a...
34:35I'll be honest, this bit's lasting longer than we'd anticipated
34:39Not the first time we've said that, am I right?
34:43Just go for the two hands if you need it
34:45Here we go
34:46Here we go
34:47Look over the chocolate
34:48Go on, go on, go on
34:52Get your flowers
34:54Get your flowers
34:55Get your scratch card please
34:56Oh, two bunches
34:57Oh, Lorraine's a romantic
34:59Grab your scratch card
35:00Fizz, fizz, fizz, fizz
35:02Yep
35:02Okay, thank you
35:03Fill it up, fill it up, fill it up, fill it up, fill it up, fill it up, fill it
35:08up
35:09Oh my god
35:10Oh
35:11This is the auto
35:12Right, right, right, who's gonna win?
35:13Who's gonna win?
35:14Oh my god
35:15Here we go
35:15Oh my god, Lorraine
35:16Oh god, I need a wee so much
35:20I can tell you
35:22That our winner is
35:24Lorraine Kelly
35:26Oh, isn't it?
35:28No, it kills it
35:29Oh, hang on
35:29Oh god
35:30Give it to Lorraine
35:31Lorraine
35:32It's so gorgeous
35:34And there is your bouquet of KitKats
35:36Oh no
35:38Oh no
35:39Congratulations
35:42It's gonna have to go to VAR
35:45Well, and more last thing for you after the break as we take a look at the upcoming World Cup
35:48But Josh, I think it's time to burn some of this petrol off, shall we?
35:51Yes, let's go for this
35:52Right, everyone duck, we're gonna go big on this burning
35:55Three
35:55Two
35:56One
36:11Welcome back to The Last Legs
36:13We're joined by Josh Pugh and Lorraine Kelly
36:15Time to talk football now, but before we do, let's welcome a man who's become an online sensation as the
36:19assistant manager of the Sunday League team Royal Oak FC, please welcome Steve Bracknell
36:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
36:37Lovely to have you here, Steve
36:39Big game this weekend
36:40You wanna tell everyone, explain for everyone uh, what the game is
36:43It's being billed as the biggest game in Sunday League history
36:47Mm-hmm
36:47I've billed it
36:49That I'll be frank
36:49Well, yeah
36:513,000 people are coming to watch two pub teams playing a football match on
36:56Easter Sunday at 2 p.m. Who are the pub teams? Royal Oak, my team and assistant
37:00manager. Let's not get hung up on titles, mate. I'm the assistant host, mate, don't worry about it.
37:07Yeah. No comment. And there's no love lost. And for the people who can't make it on
37:15the day, can they watch it? I'm allowed to mention BBC, aren't I? I mean, who knows these
37:20days, but yeah, go for it. Don't get me involved in that. The BBC have kindly agreed to live
37:32stream it to the Games Gone YouTube channel. Amazing. We're going to have people from all
37:36around globe watching 22 overweight blokes trying to put ball it back at them. And look, I understand
37:45you're a big fan of Alex Brooker so much so you've written a chant for him. Last night,
37:49I spent an hour in the shower naked. Well, I've always naked in the shower, but I'm singing
37:55about Alex. Arnick is going, Stephen, are you all right? I'm all right, love. Would you
37:59like to hear it? I'd love to hear it, please. Yeah. It's to the tune of marching in two by
38:05two. Oh. He'll never play in a football team, they said. They said they were always making jokes
38:14about his leg, his leg. Now making jokes is how he gets paid, and now he's playing
38:20Soccer day all of broker England's number nine
38:36We all
38:40Oh
38:48Thank you so much make a wish, thank you
38:54And now Josh Pugh you play for the partially sighted England futsal team
38:59And you got a visit from an important manager yet before tournament in Turkey
39:03We're training in Manchester and to motivate the lads our manager brought in a special guest and introduced him as
39:09Gareth
39:11No, sir name didn't give a surname obviously the lads are visually impaired. We couldn't see that Gareth Southgate was
39:17stood
39:20And we were just very underwhelmed
39:25Wait, obviously it's got it's like a shirt on we think he works for the hotel with
39:31Any questions for Gareth? Well, my room key is not working
39:38First and second name we need
39:42And look Lorraine I understand you're gonna be like we've got the World Cup coming up. Yes, I understand you're
39:48gonna be one of the games
39:48Yes, we're going to the Morocco game. Well, hopefully I'm going because you know
39:52There's that thing where if you've been horrible about Donald Trump. Yes, so I make gate I was hoping that
39:57would be Canada or Mexico
39:58But we're not yeah, and and I'm just worried that you know when I get there
40:02They wouldn't let me in because I may have said a bad thing about Donald Trump. I think the nicest
40:06thing I said was even
40:07That twat
40:17Is there any message you'd like to give to the Scotland team ahead of the world don't happen to be
40:21sitting on this
40:24And see the famous thing is no Scotland no party no Scotland
40:36I'm so happy you didn't keep that I'll josh does with his socks
40:42Look Steve we've we asked you ahead of coming here tonight if you could prepare a little bit of a
40:46speech for the England team you gave me 24 hour to be
40:52It's more time than we take to write the show
40:55So the stage is yours. Thank you
41:06We were all young kids once upon a time
41:10We have dreams big dreams. I never laid in bed at night dreaming about being an electrician
41:18No, we wanted to be astronauts who flight at moon, but he couldn't
41:24Some of us wanted to play for England in a world cup final
41:29And in two months time some of you lads have got the chance to make that a reality a world
41:35cup final
41:36I mean we're not sending Annie McGuire to moon
41:38I hope not anyway we need him
41:41All I ask you you lads is to keep dreaming
41:45Listen I can forgive a bad pass a penalty miss
41:48But what I cannot forgive is the inability
41:52To believe we can do it. Well, you're not so sure as that
41:57We live in divisive times and the opportunities for this country to come together a few and far between
42:05It went Gallagher's last summer that brought us together me and I Nikki had best air of his life unbelievable
42:11But now it's your turn. So go and play your hearts out. Not for me, not for Whittacombe, not for
42:16Brooker
42:16Do it for kids up and down country who are still dreaming
42:20And if football comes home, and I mean this from the bottom of me heart
42:24If it comes home, I'm banging a bargain bucket
42:28No, no, I'm doing gravy coleslaw, viennetta beans, job lord, it's on me and I mean that
42:33So get up and down and
42:35Play for that badge, but more importantly
42:39Let's try and stay together as one all right, Steve
42:50We'll have more last week for you after the break
42:51Josh will wrap up the last seven days
42:53And we're gonna unveil an anthem for the World Cup
42:55We'll see you in a little bit
43:10Welcome back to Last Legs, we're joined by Josh Pugh, Lorraine Kelly and Steve Bracknell
43:14Last week on the show we met someone by the name of Becky Coleman
43:17Now Becky was aiming to become the first wheelchair user to row the Oxford and Cambridge boat race course
43:22Arms only
43:24Yesterday she smashed it in 33 minutes and sent us this picture with the little hands in a boat that
43:30we gave her
43:31Becky's here tonight. Becky, congratulations. Well done
43:47I
43:47Also want to give a shout out to the Keithley Cougars rugby league team if I can
43:50Last year on the show you might remember Alistair Campbell challenged Keithley to help out the Ukrainian rugby league team
43:55Keithley then provided them with their official kit offered to fly a bunch of teenage
43:59They offered to fly a bunch of teenage rugby league players from Ukraine to the UK for a week
44:05The Ukrainian kids landed into Leeds Bradford this afternoon
44:08They're gonna spend the weekend in Keithley and Castleford playing and watching rugby league, which is awesome
44:13They're also taking a day trip to Haworth
44:16How I think that's how you pronounce it home of the Bronte sisters
44:18Because you know how much rugby league players love the Bronte sisters
44:22You can hear them now. Heath Cliff! Heath Cliff!
44:26Oh, we all joined. I didn't expect you to join
44:29This is the greatest audience of all of us
44:32Uh, Josh has been orbiting the last seven days. What have you got?
44:44Okay, uh, would you like to
44:46He's got to read it off the card
44:47Would you like to see an incredible clip of what could possibly go wrong when collecting your food at the
44:52end of a night out?
44:54Yes, please
45:05It's the way he tries to save it
45:07Such a journey then
45:09Would you like to see some awkward footage of poor old Craig Doyle being interrupted during rugby teams warm-up?
45:15Yes
45:18So we said today, a new member of the team, you need an initiation
45:21Usually it's a song in the bottom, you're gonna dance something disgusting
45:23I'm ready to sing, to be fair
45:24You're gonna kick this ball?
45:26Yeah, it's gonna be a debut defining moment, I think
45:28You're a pro footballer, watch your guys, let's have a look
45:31Brave man
45:34Get there!
45:35It's good effort
45:36It's good effort
45:37These chaps are giving me this
45:38Would you sign him, Geoff?
45:39Would you sign him?
45:41I'm fucking not on
45:41I'll serve it
45:43Ok
45:44Geoff's not happy about that
45:45Ok
45:45I'd probably use the language too
45:49Alright, we are about to end the show with a song for the World Cup
45:52But before we do, would you please thank our guests
45:53Josh Pugh
45:56Wayne Kelly
45:58And Steve Bracknell
46:02And my co-host Josh Whittaker
46:04And Alex Brooker
46:07We'll be back later in the year with more Last Leg
46:10But right now with the World Cup coming up
46:12We thought we'd give a shout out to all the countries competing
46:15And wish them luck with every single part of their journey
46:19Lookin' at a summer of the
46:29Forty-eight countries and all are competing here
46:34I sit and I wonder just who to cheer
46:41England
46:42Maybe
46:43Australia
46:44Not Wales
46:45Cause they went with failure
46:47But in June
46:50Scotland
46:51Might dance to a different tune
46:54Turn in to sea rich nation
46:56Get to USA vibration
46:59Getting into America
47:01Woah
47:02Getting into America
47:04Woah
47:05Has become a massive pain in the ass
47:11Fast the urban Herzegovina
47:14Norway
47:15Switzerland
47:16Portugal
47:17Maybe France
47:20Even Croatia
47:22Have got a chance
47:26Sweden
47:27Jordan
47:28And Ghana
47:29Brazil
47:30Ivory
47:31Coast
47:32And Uzbekistan
47:33We're not gonna put money on Iran
47:39Which country's gonna be central
47:41Wipe all the ass from your iPhone
47:44Getting into America
47:46Woah
47:47Getting into America
47:49Woah
47:50Has become a massive pain in the ass
47:55Thanks for watching the last leg
47:56My name's Adam Hills
47:57We'll see you later in the air
47:59For the next leg
47:59We're having a great day
48:06Woo
48:08The next leg
48:10Wipe all the ass from your half
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