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The Claudia Winkleman Show S01E04 FTP

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00:00He's planned us a little getaway out in the new forest, so we'll we'll be in a shepherd's hut with
00:05our cute dog and do some birding
00:12You do your birding I swear to God I hope that's code
00:48I
00:48Have just discovered that a dog called Rupert is scared of his local butchers
00:53Apparently not uncommon message me if you would like more details
00:57Anyway, we have a very lovely audience and some brilliant guests are joining us on the sofa. He's extremely funny
01:04He's here to talk about his latest stand-up tour. It's Russell Howard
01:18Show and Loki she has a brand new film fuse. It's Google and battle rock
01:27Oh
01:28Thank you
01:35And singer who is behind everything from Sleepless in Seattle to Mamma Mia. She has a new album out. It's
01:42Rita Wilson
01:51And he is the award-winning actor best known for x-men filth and atonement
01:57He's just directed his very first film. It's the brilliant James McAvoy
02:10Thank you
02:14Thank you for coming because you've come from very far, but you love London used to live here. I do
02:20love London. Yes
02:21I went to drama school here at lambda very long time ago, but it was super fun and it was
02:26it was you know
02:27Like you're living in England. You're in London. I saw so much theater. It was absolutely fantastic
02:33Yeah, so when you come back you like I remember this little shop or I want to have this soup
02:39from here
02:39Oh, no, no, you have to understand like I was on a student's budget and so in in America
02:45We have this thing called the freshman 10, which is when you go off to college you immediately gain 10
02:50pounds
02:50And I definitely had that because my diet was like mcdiddies mcvitties
02:55Did I say mcdiddies?
02:57Guys we're going to mcdiddies
02:59But that was mcdiddies. We all did that in freshman year
03:04Yeah, we all did that. I'll have the double ditty
03:09I'll have the double ditty and an std test
03:11But mcdiddies was also mcdonald's because it was like french fries or mcdiddies. That was my diet and my body
03:18loved it
03:19Yeah, you were like, thank you. I will yes exactly give me more please russell
03:24For you bristol or london
03:26Well, i'm from bristol, so I you know, I prefer bristol, but it's no I like I like london. I'm
03:32a fan
03:32I I got I got mugged here once and it was the most but it was the most middle-class
03:38mugging
03:38So a friend of mine had she'd just given birth, so I got some cupcakes
03:42So i'm carrying these cupcakes up this hill and this kid's probably about 15
03:46Really pasty looking kid just stands in front of me and goes oi
03:51You better give me one of them cupcakes
03:55I suddenly kind of went you can't have them that's my friend. She's just given birth and this kid suddenly
04:01went i'm sorry tell her congratulations
04:02And you said this is such a beautiful moment of like
04:09You kind of go from fear to like yeah
04:12And i like it um so guys i'd argue that glasgow's the best town i've had the best night of
04:17my life
04:17You could also get in an argument about that in glasgow
04:22That sounds like i'm slagging off my hometown it is it's the best it is it's fantastic a man from
04:26latvia carried me above his head in glasgow
04:30No, it's just the most fun everybody there wants you to have a good time they're incredibly proud of glasgow
04:36Yeah, if eilish people hadn't already invented the crack we would be inventing the crack
04:42Gugu you have been to scotland i yeah i went to glasgow actually the first time um when i was
04:4911
04:50i was on i don't know if anybody remembers the um
04:54Children's game show fun house oh yes anybody remember that yeah yeah yeah yeah
04:59It was a game show like it there was the red team and the the yellow team it was presented
05:04by pat sharp yeah
05:06twins kind of cheerleaders melanie and martina oh my god yeah
05:12Did you win what what could you win like the twins we won
05:17We won i remember this really like dates it now i won like an amstrad pc yes
05:23um i won like dry slope skiing lessons which
05:29this is so depressing
05:33Okay now
05:34Gugu is it true that you start every day with with a power pose oh
05:38i mean not every day but i do love a power pose what does that mean tell me
05:43um i oh my gosh i i watched this ted talk a few years ago about the idea of you
05:48know how to change
05:49your mood by changing your posture or changing your body and you know that if you can kind of
05:53you slump your shoulders and you know you love something well you can also just feel a bit more
05:58down or a bit more kind of depressed
06:02but if you like really
06:04but if you want like a quick way to kind of just trick your you know your body into feeling
06:11and your
06:12mind into feeling more uplifted you can do a power pose i prefer the sort of it's a bit hard
06:16to do in
06:16this dress but like the arms out kind of like you know show me to the universe can everyone do
06:22it
06:22everyone can do it if you're able join us yeah technically you should stand up okay and just
06:27kind of like arms up in a v yes chest to the sky and just like just breathe for a
06:34second feel
06:34like i'm in a cult yeah i feel like it don't you feel like a little bit more confident a
06:38little bit
06:39more like joyful okay okay it worked yeah it worked it worked that was an oprah
06:52so thank you very much for the power post uh james mcavoy you've just directed your first film did yes
07:00why this film why that oh man there's many many reasons why this film i knew i wanted to make
07:05films about we pull from lower income backgrounds council estates or schemes as we call them in scotland
07:12which is why i call it california scheming and um and there was just nothing coming in that was
07:18getting me excited that was going to be funny and entertaining as well as about the realities of
07:22coming from that kind of community and then california scheming came along and it just did everything that
07:28i needed to do it's so much heart it had so much comedy it's so much pathos but then it
07:34was also kind
07:35of about one of the reasons i think we maybe don't have more scottish films more regularly and that to
07:40me
07:41was just like a perfect package unbelievably it is a true story tell everybody what it's about
07:47two young guys from dundee extremely talented rappers ninja rappers and um they answered a big casting call
07:54for a big record label down in london back in the early noughties like 2002 2003 and uh they got
08:01about
08:01halfway through one of their excellent tracks and they got stopped and laughed at and um they were
08:07they were labeled as the rapping proclaimers and uh so they took yeah right so they were devastated but
08:13they took the note and they went we've got it sacrifice and integrity sacrifice and authenticity
08:18sacrifice everything that is important to the culture of hip-hop which is the streets that made you
08:23and they came back as americans and they basically became it's unbelievable oh my god they came back as
08:30method actors um and they re-recorded all their tracks they didn't change the tracks it was the same music
08:35just with an american accent and they got a record deal for tens of thousands of pounds they cut six
08:41albums they supported eminem d12 they played all over the country they were on mtv umpteen times with
08:46the plan that when they were making it big enough they would go on in their minds jonathan ross and
08:52they
08:53would come out and expose the industry for being i don't know obsessed with the norm yeah and uh and
08:59then of
08:59course that didn't quite happen and they got into the fame and it was two and a half years of
09:03being in
09:04character constantly and if i don't know if you know any method actors but it's not the best thing
09:08for your mental health i wouldn't know no i reckon they were ever tickled your real voice would surely
09:15come out yeah leave it alone you bastard i mean should we have a look at the trailer we would
09:23like to sign you
09:25get the bubbles they actually think you're american yeah but your accents are pure shite i know
09:31we'll release a single and then we'll come out fully scottish and expose those wankers
09:35killin the billy smokin the billy's hotter than chilies you know the dilly leaf you're not in my
09:40water's like mili vanilla everyone loves you
09:46i think i might have screwed empson up
10:08so i'm really glad that you have us on to talk about it thank you claude well i like the
10:12fact not at all that i read that you said sometimes the biggest thing in the room
10:16is an accent well i think sometimes the you're a person when you walk into a room right and you
10:22are
10:22you have infinite possibilities you're capable of anything in the eyes of the people that you're with
10:27and then whatever it is that makes you different sometimes just turns you into that thing only
10:31and that becomes bigger than your potential bigger than you as an individual and i think for scottish
10:37people this isn't every room you walk into as a scottish person it's not every reaction i get but i
10:41definitely walked into a room and suddenly i go from being somebody who might get the job and suddenly
10:48i'm just a wee accent and it becomes a bit reductive and they kind of just make you tiny and
10:52make you just
10:53that one thing and that's sort of game over at that point and look i get it like you know
10:58there are
10:59people who suffer forms of discrimination way way way way way way worse than that but it's a it's the
11:04voice of
11:04an entire nation that takes in many people of different colors creeds genders sexualities all sorts of
11:11things and that voice i think sometimes gets reduced rather than being heard for six million people
11:17i'd love to see more scottish films have you personally have you personally ever been told to
11:29sort of turn it down oh i've been literally told to turn it down and uh i was playing a
11:35particularly
11:35famous scottish role um as a scottish person and was you know was asked to do it as a scottish
11:42person
11:42which was great and brilliant and i'm in rehearsals and the director said to me i won't do his accent
11:47because it's reductive um even though if you paid me i would um how much do you know yeah exactly
11:54uh i ain't cheap cloria um and he goes uh it goes just so you know james every now and
12:00again when
12:01we're on the day i might just ask you to and i was like what do you mean he went
12:05scottish
12:08scottish and he did that voice as well and i was just like what a wallop wow yeah what a
12:14wallop
12:14that's a very good word how did you find directing for the first time and acting because i imagine that
12:22is
12:23that's juggling i wouldn't wish directing and acting on my worst enemy when i see people at bradley
12:27cooper or whatever play big huge leading roles in the director i'm like you must have a self-harming
12:31thing you know um yeah it was it was a nightmare it was like you'd literally be going like oh
12:37i need
12:37some more love or i need more comedy or i mean i just need more connection or whatever and somebody's
12:41whispering and you're gonna we can't get the port-a-loose for tomorrow so we have to change
12:45that change the location because if anybody needs a we won't be able to make it happen
12:52and you're like okay okay and if you could just have more love in your eyes right now and actually
12:59where's the nina shitter um yeah it was it was mental and then you're having to go and act and
13:04then
13:04you're on your weight your mark somebody's giving you more chat about the port-a-loose and it was it
13:08was
13:08it was a lot i had no idea the director has to deal with the toilet facilities there was a
13:13lot of talk
13:14about everything there was a lot of talk about toileting um i like the fact that you because you
13:21didn't have the biggest budget you were careful and you had to fill a stadium right or you had to
13:26fill a huge venue of 2 000 people 2 000 people at the battlelands yeah it was amazing and we
13:31were
13:31like you know i did atonement which had i know tens of millions in the budget and we could only
13:36manage
13:36like what is that a thousand extras on that and we needed two thousand which would have cost us i
13:41was informed one day maybe offhand that was 350 grand which we couldn't do so we ended up putting
13:46on a gig ourselves roddy and tommy roddy hurt and tommy riley who are amazing musicians and composers up
13:52in glasgow put together a sort of local super band we advertised it and we got 2000 glaswegians to
13:59come and um dress in the naughty's outfits put the phones away and jam out to this amazing naughty's
14:05gig that we put on with this glasgow super band and then if you would stay for a couple of
14:10tracks
14:10from our boys and we thought you know we'll get a couple of takes and five cameras and we'll get
14:15as
14:15much as we can and the glasgow crowd stayed for two hours and our boys just ended up putting on
14:21a real
14:21gig and it was it was electric it was amazing and they do this thing glasgow i don't know if
14:26they did it
14:26back then but they do this thing glasgow at gigs where we go if we appreciate what you do we
14:32shout
14:32can i swear yeah you can bleep it out we shout on mass 2 000 people hear me hear me
14:37here we
14:37fucking go hear me hear me here we fucking go and they just chant it at the singers and they
14:43did it
14:43for our boys and so even though i don't think it was the right time period for that we stuck
14:47it in the
14:48film but yeah it's just you can't not put that in the movie it's amazing i don't think you know
14:54that
14:55this was a movie about rappers but um maybe my agents didn't get to you i i do spit some
15:03flow james
15:04you have you got some fat bars i have some fat bars i mean you're asking us to ask you
15:10to spit
15:10some right now yes all right are you good so i'm gonna spit some flow right now shall i
15:15i might need audience participation what do you need us to do and i just want to
15:25i need a bracket we haven't been drinking i know i need a beat
15:32you drew a picture of my morning but you couldn't make my day i'm walking in your nine but you
15:36never
15:36look my way i'm looking down you darling and every single right your funny flow is born and
15:41your green card's on the way this ain't got shit to do with shampoo so watch your head and shoulder
15:44you're the old and bold enough to fold your yo i told you i'm late afraid of what i made
15:48and played
15:48it for some funky tricks to say you're flipping big put that music in the funky breaks trigger from
15:52the bill town ill town so that's how it feels now the deals that were real so we're still around
15:57don't lamp with your freestyle phantom ain't trying to be handsome think of what you're thinking
16:01because i'm vamping i live and die for hip-hop this is hip-hop for today i give props to
16:05hip-hop so hip-hop hooray
16:07oh my i mean in the sequel yes i think you can bring the mother wilson i did not know
16:28that was
16:29coming i am delighted yes um james tell me when the movie's out movie is coming oh
16:36on april the 10th uh nationwide and all across ireland as well so yeah please get yourselves along
16:44we're really proud of it we definitely will um rita we're going to talk about your album but first
16:55just because uh we need to produce mamma mia i don't know about you tell me is number three coming
17:03how
17:04a share of people sewn dungarees okay okay well um all right let me just say this that tell us
17:13the
17:13truth there no there will always be discussions about a third mamma mia because who wouldn't want
17:19a third mamma mia that is the truth right pure joy it's it's a movie that has given people pure
17:29joy and
17:30happiness i i i mean it's it's just wonderful so yes there are always discussions but there's nothing
17:36definitively to announce okay thank you so much um here's the thing the greek government loved you for
17:45doing it so much they put your face on a stamp that is true i think wow look at that
17:56i mean it's still
17:59i also like it because it's quite bridal it's really isn't it it's very bridal it's divine but you know
18:05what's interesting is i can't get out of my head though this image of people licking the back of my
18:12head it's just so strange do you need it to actually happen so that you can exercise yeah
18:19could you get ready let's go thank you wow that feels good that feels good do you think do you
18:29think the
18:29queen and philip ever did that yeah so rita you're about to release your sixth studio album i have it
18:37here's sound of a woman you said it's your most revealing album yeah i believe what do you it is
18:50it's about different phases of a woman's life you know it's as we come into the world as young girls
18:57were labeled where you know oh what a sweet young girl what a sassy teen oh now you're a good
19:03worker a
19:04student or you're a girlfriend or a wife or a mother or something and all of those things are
19:11parts of who we are but they're not exactly everything that we are look it's like you're
19:15shedding all those images don't you feel like at a certain point in your life like i'm at the age
19:20right now where i just don't care what anybody thinks yeah i don't care what anybody said i've earned
19:24that right yeah everybody should earn it at any point in your life really it shouldn't just be
19:32well you know i've gotten to this age and i don't believe that there is a clock on creativity like
19:39at what point does somebody say oh i'm so sorry yeah you were supposed to do that at 29 and
19:45three
19:45quarters years old and that time has passed who's to say it we're only limited really by our own
19:51perceptions or beliefs about what we tell ourselves yeah absolutely
20:00the album is called the sound of a woman right what is the sound of a woman that's my question
20:08is it i'm gonna ask you that question is it what is it hip-hop it's definitely hip-hop the
20:13sound of a
20:14woman i think is just exactly i say that quite a lot my husband has an idea exactly that's another
20:23one
20:23bit bad yeah go make the bed do his homework no more words one of my one of my favorite
20:33noises
20:34a woman's ever made i was in wow wait a minute wow wow i saw a lady uh see johnny
20:42depp uh in the
20:43streets it's probably about 20 years ago and the noise i'll never do it justice but she just saw it
20:48with
20:50It was so just, and you could sort of see it happening as he's walking down various
20:55women, he was just sort of gliding down the street, just causing various noises.
21:00Um, I could do something but it's filthy.
21:02Do it, just do it right now before we run.
21:04No, no, no.
21:05Yes!
21:09Yes!
21:10Yes!
21:10Yes!
21:10Yes!
21:11Yes!
21:12Yes!
21:14Yes!
21:14Yes!
21:15Yes!
21:15Yes!
21:17Yes!
21:17Yes!
21:18Yes!
21:21I was just making conversation.
21:24No, no, you're doing it.
21:25I'll tell you what I can do.
21:27I can do an extraordinary, but it's audio only, horse impression.
21:32Do you want to go round the back so that we can only hear you?
21:37And I have used it in foreplay.
21:42You make them laugh.
21:43Are you ready?
21:44Have a minute.
21:45You do it.
21:45It's audio.
21:47Just imagine, wedding night, 28 years, guys.
21:51Ready?
21:52Okay.
21:52Are you coming to bed?
21:53Yes.
21:54I get pretend hooves on.
21:55I don't.
21:56Great.
21:57Are you ready?
21:59Oh!
22:00Oh!
22:01Oh!
22:02Oh!
22:03Oh!
22:03Oh, yeah.
22:04Oh, yeah.
22:08We all would.
22:10We all would.
22:11Yeah.
22:11That is the sound of a woman.
22:17Just to be clear.
22:19Oh, what a man.
22:21Peter, let us have a look at your video.
22:25Oh, good.
22:25Oh, yes.
22:26This is Jury of One.
22:28Out today.
22:28I don't know what I don't know, but I know that I'm confused.
22:36Pleading for forgiveness, but there really is no use.
22:43After everything I've done, there's a jury of just one.
22:50I don't know that it's me.
22:55Sorry.
22:58There it is.
23:01And it's out today.
23:02That song is called Jury of One because it's about feeling guilty.
23:06You're always guilty.
23:08Like, if you're working, you feel guilty that you're not at home
23:10and with the kids or with your family.
23:12And then if you're with your kids and the family at home,
23:16you're thinking creatively like, oh, gosh, I feel bad that I'm not
23:19working there.
23:19And I think that guilt has a twin sister called apology.
23:23Yeah.
23:23And apology is like, women, we say I'm sorry all the time for
23:27all sorts of things.
23:27Like, somebody could kick me in the knee and it'd be like,
23:30I'm so sorry my knee was in the way.
23:32Yeah.
23:32Okay.
23:33I'm a fan of both guilt and apologizing.
23:36Exactly.
23:37I am.
23:37I quite find it.
23:38I never mean it.
23:39No.
23:41You know what I mean?
23:42That's when they're getting it wrong.
23:43I'm so sorry.
23:44I'm so sorry.
23:47Just filling in some space.
23:50I'm joking unless I did you wrong, which I'm very sorry.
23:54No, I am.
23:56I am.
23:57One of the songs is called marriage.
23:59You have been married for 38 years.
24:01We have a couple here who are getting married.
24:04Hello.
24:05Hello.
24:05There they are.
24:06Oh.
24:07Hi.
24:07That's great.
24:10I believe...
24:11Are you getting married in like a week?
24:14Yes.
24:14Yes.
24:14How are you going to celebrate?
24:16We're getting married in Nottingham.
24:18Yeah, lovely.
24:19And our reception is at a water park.
24:22That's a great location.
24:23Yeah, yeah.
24:23Water park, sir.
24:24Guys, you are being too polite.
24:27I'm sorry.
24:27I can't do this.
24:29Listen, but...
24:30Have you put down the deposit?
24:34Deposits are paid.
24:36Everything's paid.
24:36Everything's paid.
24:37But have you ever been to Aqualand in Benador?
24:40No.
24:42Like, you don't even have to go on the rides to have fun.
24:44One of the best things is when you watch a big northern man go down a flume.
24:52It's just like...
24:54Because he...
24:56Sometimes the trunks arrive before the man.
24:59It's that kind of...
25:01But they look like haunted babies.
25:03They...
25:04You just hear them,
25:05It's too fast, Linda!
25:06It's too fast!
25:07Like everything!
25:08It's...
25:09But if your marriage has as many highs as that water park has given me,
25:14Oh, yeah.
25:15And I'm sure you can have a blessed, blessed life, yeah.
25:17Are you wearing a bikini and a veil?
25:19Like, what's your outfit?
25:20No.
25:21Look, it's TBC.
25:22Whether I'll actually go down there.
25:24Oh, really?
25:24OK.
25:25Oh, you've got to go down.
25:26Yeah.
25:27Hold it high!
25:28Well, you know...
25:28Woo!
25:29Yeah!
25:30You know, I meant...
25:34I meant...
25:35I meant...
25:35I didn't know that.
25:38APPLAUSE
25:42And congratulations again.
25:44The answer...
25:45Longevity, what's the answer?
25:46The answer is, don't get divorced.
25:50Very long.
25:52Marriage.
25:52Yeah.
25:53Stay married.
25:53Yeah.
25:55Thank you very much.
25:55And also, don't watch box sets apart.
25:58Oh, yeah.
25:59I think that's very...
26:00No binge cheating.
26:01Yeah.
26:02That's a better way of putting it.
26:03No binge cheating.
26:04Yes.
26:04Rita, when is this out?
26:07Please tell us.
26:07The album is out May 1st.
26:09The two singles, Michelangelo and Sound Of A Woman Are Out and Jury Of One Today.
26:14Oh, lovely.
26:15APPLAUSE
26:17And...
26:18And, Claudia, I should mention this because I forget that I'm going to be touring in the UK and Europe
26:25in November.
26:26This is perfect.
26:27Yes.
26:28It's really good.
26:29It's really good.
26:34Um...
26:34Yes?
26:35A slight bone to pick with you.
26:37All right.
26:37You enjoy camping?
26:38Yeah.
26:39I love camping.
26:40So do you mean camping as in, we're coming, pitch up the tent and bring me a pet giraffe,
26:45or are you...
26:47I don't know.
26:48I've never camped.
26:48No.
26:49Or you're like driving and you're making a stove?
26:53Yes.
26:53We have one of those vans that is, you know, kitted out with a bed and a kitchen and everything.
26:59And there's nothing better than cooking in the outdoors.
27:02It is so fantastic.
27:04Like, I don't know.
27:05There's something about being under the stars and there's a lovely little...
27:09Lovely.
27:10..toilet in there.
27:11So it's very civilised.
27:12It's very civilised.
27:13Is it one of those where you have that blue liquid and you have to...
27:16No.
27:17They're very high-tech now.
27:19Oh, are they?
27:19Very, very high-tech.
27:21So, you know what I mean?
27:22It's that weird...
27:22Exactly.
27:23It's great and then you're like...
27:25Terrible.
27:27You're not working away, you're shame.
27:29No.
27:30It's beautiful and it's really, really great.
27:34Yeah.
27:34But it is that, sometimes you're like...
27:36And that's really...
27:37Your friend's coming in in a minute.
27:38Yeah.
27:39She's making the horse noises!
27:42I can't kill the move!
27:46I haven't camped for a while, but I remember I was about 23.
27:50I was down in New Zealand.
27:51It was amazing and I barely saw another living soul the whole time I did it.
27:53That was just backpacking?
27:55Backpacking and camping.
27:56Wow.
27:56That's a challenge.
27:56And I'm in the middle of the Coromando subtropical rainforest
28:00and it's night time and there's possums, right?
28:02And the possums rustle around and do all that kind of stuff.
28:05I just got so scared this one night that I got my gas lamp on
28:10and I turned my gas lamp on to cast shadows on my tent
28:13and I got my little, like, Swiss army knife
28:15and I got every little attachment out of it and I was like,
28:17I can't get more of that!
28:19You see me?
28:20You see me?
28:21I've got...
28:21I'm carrying!
28:23Tune up your pants!
28:25So...
28:26With tweezers?
28:27Yeah, I know.
28:28There's a torch and a pen!
28:31Gugu, do you camp?
28:33You know, I didn't really grow up camping.
28:35Only child problems.
28:37But, no, I'm a bit of a beginner.
28:39And I did camp for the first time a couple of years ago
28:43on a trip climbing up Mount Kilimanjaro.
28:46Oh, wow!
28:48That was kind of...
28:49You went from zero to 90.
28:50I know, I know.
28:51And I was...
28:52Yeah, I kind of, you know, obviously it's like six, seven days
28:56and altitude and all of that.
28:58And, you know, being a beginner, I was like,
28:59what about, you know, being comfortable?
29:01And, you know, I was really...
29:02I'd maybe glamped, you know, or something.
29:05So, I brought, like, I bought one little luxury,
29:08which was, like, my little goose pillow.
29:10Oh, that's smart.
29:11And I took that up.
29:12But, erm, everybody, everybody laughed at me.
29:14Er, you don't camp.
29:16I can see that face.
29:17Well, just because we used to go camping loads
29:18because we didn't have any money when we were younger.
29:21So, the first time you get into a hotel, it's just incredible.
29:25Oh, yeah.
29:25Yeah.
29:25Like, have you been wiping your arse with a leaf?
29:28And then suddenly this toilet roll
29:30and, like, little pots of jam that you can steal?
29:33Yeah!
29:34I'm good.
29:36Exactly.
29:36Don't get this in the woods.
29:38Gugu, we have something in common.
29:40You have a trampoline.
29:42I bought a trampoline.
29:43Oh, yeah.
29:43Yeah.
29:44Who told you to get a trampoline?
29:45You know, my friend Sarah, at the beginning of lockdown,
29:49erm, took me to this trampoline class in LA
29:52and I was like, this is amazing!
29:54Like, it's so kind of ridiculous
29:57but actually really difficult.
29:59But kind of fun, too.
30:00And really fun.
30:00And I think, you know, and so as soon as, like, Covid hit,
30:03I ordered a trampoline because I felt like, you know,
30:06you do, like, three or four bounces on a trampoline
30:08and you feel like six years old.
30:09I bought a little trampoline.
30:11But with the handle.
30:12Because I'm 54.
30:14Yes.
30:14Yes.
30:15Start with the handle.
30:17You hold the handle.
30:19I haven't taken out of a trampoline.
30:20You also look like you're riding your own horse.
30:21Yeah, yeah.
30:31It's the most fun.
30:32It's the most fun.
30:33Yeah.
30:33Do you know we have the Olympic gold medalist,
30:37the best at trampolining in the world.
30:39Briony, you're here.
30:40What?
30:40Hey!
30:41Hey!
30:42Hey!
30:42Hey!
30:43Hey!
30:46Hey!
30:54Tony, thank you for being with us.
30:59Thank you for being with us.
31:16Um...
31:16We're going to have a roller coaster.
31:17I half remember, because I remember nothing in my life,
31:20I half remember somebody telling me that bouncing
31:21has a particular sort of physiological benefit.
31:25Is that right?
31:26Or did I make that up one time?
31:27No, definitely.
31:27So, I think it was Nasser that said,
31:30if you do 30 minutes on a trampoline,
31:32sorry, 10 minutes on a trampoline is like 30 minutes running.
31:35Yeah.
31:35But also very good for court.
31:37It just makes us all happy.
31:38Let's all get trampoline.
31:39Yeah.
31:39After the next show, we'll go to Trampoline Pop.
31:42Yeah.
31:43It's really fun.
31:44Yeah.
31:44Now, Gugu, we're going to talk about the film,
31:47called Fused.
31:48Tell us what it's about.
31:50Fused.
31:50It's a heist action thriller set in London.
31:55And, yeah, I play a police officer in it.
31:57There's a discovery of an unexploded World War II bomb in London.
32:02And it's kind of a race against time to evacuate the city.
32:05But also, there's kind of a twist in it as well,
32:10in that there's a...
32:11Well, I don't want to give it away.
32:12But it's a very kind of gripping heist thriller,
32:16and it's with Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Theo James, myself,
32:20Sam Worthington and Saffron Hawkins.
32:22What a good cast.
32:23Yes.
32:23Let us have a clip, please.
32:25We detected a heat signature inside the cordon.
32:27We need to investigate.
32:29We think people could still be there.
32:32Right, the police have detected an unidentified heat source.
32:40Gee, Superintendent, what's going on?
32:42Sorry, Major, but we've had to send a car in.
32:44We'll relay police radio now to keep you in the loop.
32:47I'm in the middle of a very dangerous procedure.
32:49I haven't even finished the mitigation wall,
32:50which means if the bomb detonates,
32:52I don't even have to tell you how bad that's going to be.
32:55I understand, Major, but we can't risk injury to the public.
32:59We'll be as quick as we can.
33:01Oh!
33:03It looks so great.
33:06And you've shadowed police officers, didn't you?
33:09Yes.
33:09And learned a lot about the work they do.
33:11Yeah, I mean, my character is Chief Superintendent,
33:14and she is, her role is what's running gold in the command control centre.
33:18So I got to visit some command control centres in London and in Essex
33:23and talk to some high-ranking female police officers,
33:26of which there are still very few.
33:28So it was really interesting sort of being in those control centres,
33:32seeing those cameras of London, you know, at the switch of a button,
33:36you can see pretty much any street or view in London,
33:40which is kind of comforting and kind of chilling.
33:43But, no, it was really, really interesting to kind of learn about that work,
33:46as I say, because to be able to have that, you know, perspective from real police officers
33:51was really, really helpful.
33:53So, when can we watch Fuse?
33:54Oh, it's out today!
33:56Perfect!
33:57Excellent!
33:57CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
34:01James, I love the fact we were chatting earlier and you said
34:03your favourite thing is when you're acting is watching the person
34:07who is acting right in front of...
34:08Like, sometimes you're...
34:09And I love when you're so in awe.
34:12Oh, man.
34:12Sometimes really good acting just makes it all seem seamless
34:16and all that kind of stuff.
34:17Sometimes you're working with somebody who just does something so good,
34:20you're like, oh, my God.
34:22And then you drop your line and you mess up the whole scene
34:25and you mess them up.
34:25But I quite often find myself with really good actors just, like,
34:29mouthing along with them.
34:31LAUGHTER
34:31And they'll be like, what are you doing?
34:33I'm like, I'm sorry, what?
34:34I'm just in the same with you.
34:35You're like, you're mouthing my lines.
34:37And I'm like, no, no, no, no, I'm just, like, preparing my line.
34:41But, yeah, I've messed a couple of actors up by doing that.
34:44How amazing to be, cos you're nodding, you must...
34:47Oh, no, yeah, I remember I did a movie called It's Complicated,
34:50with Meryl Streep.
34:51And you're looking at this person and you're like,
34:55it's Meryl Streep.
34:58I can't believe it's Sophie from Sophie's Choice.
35:01And then you just have to kind of become a professional
35:03and do your thing.
35:04But that first few moments is definitely distracting.
35:09I was like that with your husband.
35:10Oh, really?
35:11Not that we acted together, but, like, I would go in...
35:14Yeah, no, he wouldn't let me.
35:17LAUGHTER
35:18We should say who your husband is.
35:19Just tell the group.
35:22You're married too.
35:23Just so you know.
35:25Yes, tell me.
35:27I'm sorry to have to tell you this,
35:29but you have all this and be married to Tom Hanks.
35:31Yes, I am.
35:33And I...
35:34Yep, he does deserve that.
35:35CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
35:37I don't know why I do this thing sometimes
35:39when I get around famous people,
35:40when they kind of go like,
35:41hey, what's up?
35:42What are you going to get for lunch?
35:43And they've just been totally normal.
35:44And I'm like, I feel so uncomfortable.
35:48And I go into this weird sort of over,
35:51like, almost put on working class thing.
35:53All right, man, I know I'm going to get some chips or something.
35:57LAUGHTER
35:57And I'm going to get, like,
35:58I drive a Punto.
36:00LAUGHTER
36:00Do you know what I mean?
36:01Why would you drive a Ferrari?
36:02You know, brilliant, aye.
36:04I'm going to get some bread with butter.
36:06LAUGHTER
36:06I'm going to get some caviar.
36:08And I don't know why that happens.
36:10Yeah, of course, I don't like it.
36:11It's a bit like...
36:12It's weird.
36:12When you really fancy somebody.
36:15Yeah.
36:15But early on, you know,
36:16with the first person,
36:17I fancy somebody so badly when I was 17,
36:19he was speaking to me,
36:19and I would just be sick.
36:21LAUGHTER
36:30I went to see Rufus Wainwright, the singer,
36:33who I'm a big fan of,
36:34and he invited me to go out for dinner with him,
36:37so we went for dinner.
36:37It was really exciting.
36:38You know when you meet your hero
36:39and then you're up in tea?
36:41Yeah.
36:41I had some spare jam.
36:44Abrickle?
36:45Yeah.
36:46He had some toilet paper.
36:49But we were sort of hanging out,
36:50and then he said,
36:51oh, do you want to go and hang out with my friend Carrie?
36:53I was like, oh, yeah, sure.
36:54So then we'd come and meet Carrie,
36:56and it was Carrie Fisher.
36:57Oh!
36:58Wow.
36:58So I'm suddenly in this insane...
37:00I'm round Carrie Fisher's house,
37:01and her dog was eating ice cream,
37:03and she was about to start...
37:05With his food?
37:05Not with his food!
37:06LAUGHTER
37:07I didn't do that.
37:08I didn't do that.
37:09Oh, wow!
37:10But, yeah,
37:11he wasn't doing that.
37:12I naturally did the vibe.
37:14So anyway,
37:14so we were sort of just drinking,
37:16and Carrie wasn't,
37:17but me and Rufus were blah, blah, blah.
37:19And then they found out that I was a stand-up comedian,
37:22and they were both like,
37:23do some...
37:24Oh, wow!
37:25Yeah, and I was like,
37:26well, no, you can't...
37:27Is that really...
37:28It doesn't work.
37:29Like, I just...
37:29And I'm trying to explain that she's like,
37:31just go into the bathroom,
37:32come out,
37:33do five minutes.
37:34I'm like, how...
37:35How are we here?
37:36Are you going to come out in laundry?
37:38Yeah, yeah, yeah.
37:39Wow!
37:39But, so I kind of desperately thought,
37:42right, this idea I had of, like,
37:43human beings blame animals for our weird behaviour.
37:47Like, I've never seen a rat snitch,
37:49I've never seen a badger badger,
37:50I've never seen an elephant in a room go,
37:52I know.
37:54Um...
37:54Catfish is my favourite.
37:56You know, catfish,
37:57someone goes online,
37:58pretends to be someone else,
37:59they don't do that.
38:00They're not in the sea going,
38:01show us your tits,
38:02I'm a dolphin.
38:03Right?
38:04That's right.
38:05Yeah, yeah, yeah.
38:05Funny.
38:07Utter silent.
38:08Oh!
38:10And Carrie Fisher,
38:11aka Princess Leia,
38:12goes,
38:12people paying money for this?
38:14LAUGHTER
38:16Well, you know,
38:18occasionally,
38:18and like that.
38:19And it's just...
38:20I love that you become the Evans.
38:22Oh, yeah.
38:23LAUGHTER
38:23It was mortifying.
38:24But it was,
38:25for whatever reason,
38:26stand-up is,
38:27as soon as you're told to do it,
38:29it's...
38:29Yeah.
38:29It's gone.
38:30You've started taking your family on tour with you?
38:32I have, yes.
38:33Haven't you?
38:33Because you're doing this massive tour.
38:35Yes.
38:35You're going with your wife and your 19-month-old.
38:37Yes.
38:38I've been doing stand-up for 28 years.
38:40But travelling with those two just makes it really fun again,
38:44because then you get to kind of...
38:46Like, we're going to Manchester this weekend,
38:48and there's a transport museum,
38:50there's a...
38:50Yeah.
38:51There's a Legoland,
38:52and he's really into diggers.
38:54Like, he loves diggers.
38:55Oh, they love diggers.
38:57So...
38:57So we're...
38:58So...
38:58But basically...
38:59But I've got these...
39:00I've got, like, six gigs,
39:01and yet the highlight is the transport museum,
39:04because I know it's going to blow his mind.
39:06Oh, completely.
39:07But it's that funny thing of, like,
39:09nothing prepares you for how excited your kids get
39:11about baffling stuff.
39:14Yeah.
39:14So, too.
39:15We've got, like, a little stick.
39:16If I push the stick around,
39:18like, my son's like,
39:19Daddy Hoover!
39:20Daddy Hoover!
39:22And that makes me happy because he's happy.
39:25So, I'm now, like, this just...
39:27I'm so eager.
39:28But it's got to that stage where I'm like,
39:29Daddy Hoover?
39:30Daddy...
39:31And he's like,
39:32Oh, that was so yesterday.
39:34I was about to say,
39:36because you're about...
39:36You know, you're about to go on stage
39:38and make thousands of people laugh.
39:40Yeah.
39:40Anyone who knows a 19-month-old,
39:42try and make them smile.
39:44Sometimes it happens,
39:45but you...
39:45I mean, you have to work hard...
39:47Yeah.
39:47...to make them laugh.
39:48Right?
39:49When they're six months,
39:49you do a fake sneeze,
39:50they giggle.
39:51You're like,
39:52Come on!
39:52And they get to about two,
39:54and you're like,
39:54Do you find this funny?
39:57Yeah.
39:58Yeah, that's not actually what a sheep sounds like.
40:02A horse on the other hand.
40:03Yeah.
40:04A horse?
40:05I'll hold my beard.
40:07LAUGHTER
40:09The Tourist Court Don't Tell The Algorithm.
40:11Yes.
40:11I love that title.
40:12Will you change your material as you go?
40:15Oh, yeah.
40:15Particularly if you're travelling in Europe,
40:16and you've...
40:16I remember being in Norway,
40:18they've got a phrase called
40:19which is...
40:21It translates as a waiting sausage.
40:23So, if you keep a Norwegian waiting,
40:26they will eat a hot dog.
40:28And I just think it's such a funny excuse for gluttony.
40:32Just...
40:32Like,
40:33you know,
40:33if you force me to linger,
40:34I eat a pork finger.
40:36LAUGHTER
40:37And it's this...
40:39That...
40:39In that moment...
40:41APPLAUSE
40:44But it's...
40:44It's that thing...
40:45That...
40:46That wouldn't be funny if you were doing it in Halifax,
40:49but that night, if you...
40:50Oh, I don't know.
40:51No, no, no, but...
40:52It's funny.
40:53But if you're able to kind of really be in a place,
40:56and the audience can tell,
40:58you're like,
40:58Oh, my God, this is happening now.
41:00This...
41:00Yes.
41:01It really does something.
41:02It's kind of...
41:03And if you can blend it with material,
41:05and actually be there and improvise,
41:07it's...
41:08You can...
41:08You get into that kind of flow state,
41:10and it's the best.
41:10I love it so much.
41:11I really...
41:12I think I'm a lifer.
41:13I haven't found anything through which I can do life more
41:16than stand-up.
41:17Is it true that Billy Connolly made you want to be a stand-up?
41:21Yeah, I think so.
41:22I just remember watching my dad howl.
41:24And he was like...
41:25I think Billy Connolly was like,
41:26for a certain generation,
41:27like this fire in the corner of the country,
41:30where we'd kind of warm ourselves around,
41:32and you'd see your dad laughing,
41:33your mum was laughing,
41:34your uncle, whatever.
41:35Yeah.
41:35And I was so intrigued by this kind of like...
41:38this guy.
41:39I was like,
41:39imagine trying to be that.
41:41And then I got to interview him,
41:42which was like talking to God.
41:44And then kind of making him laugh.
41:47Wild.
41:47And he's such a sweet,
41:50just, you know,
41:51beautiful man.
41:52Oh, yeah.
41:53I could talk about him for hours.
41:54I love him.
41:54But I imagine everyone in Scotland feels the same.
41:56Absolutely.
41:57You know, when you've got a nickname,
41:58call him The Big One.
42:00The Big One.
42:01The Big Man.
42:01Yeah.
42:02The Big One.
42:03Yeah, The Big One.
42:04That's a good email address.
42:05Yes.
42:07It is.
42:07It promises a lot.
42:09Exactly.
42:13Everything's about expectations.
42:16Especially if he's at Hotmail.
42:20He's big at Hotmail.
42:22It's wild.
42:25Russell, how can people see the top?
42:27They can see it.
42:28It's all over the country,
42:30all over England,
42:31and Ireland,
42:32and Scotland,
42:34until November.
42:35Thank you very much.
42:36Pleasure.
42:37Pleasure.
42:41We've nearly come to the end of the show.
42:43Have we covered everything?
42:46Is there anybody here,
42:47we are not qualified,
42:49who would like some guidance on anything?
42:51I really like hands going up.
42:53It's so good.
42:54Wait, I need to get you a microphone.
42:56I was a bit keen, sorry.
42:58I was just wondering what advice you have.
43:01If you're having a conversation with someone
43:02and then they start going on their phone
43:04while you're talking to them,
43:06what do you do?
43:06Ooh.
43:08I think most people stay married to them
43:09for quite a long time.
43:11LAUGHTER
43:13But...
43:17That sounds like I'm slagging my wife off.
43:19No, it doesn't.
43:20I'm not, I'm not.
43:20It's me.
43:21Or you just call them.
43:24LAUGHTER
43:26And then suddenly you're there.
43:30That's how it works.
43:32Thank you so much.
43:35That's it for this week.
43:36I would like to thank my guests,
43:37Russell Howard,
43:40Rita Wilton,
43:41Gugu and Batalwar,
43:43and James McAvoy.
43:46Join me next week,
43:47where my guests will be
43:48from the shoulder swap,
43:49Olivia Cook,
43:50Anna Faris
43:51and Ralph Fiennes.
43:53Good night.
43:57If you're brave enough to tackle the boardroom,
43:59head to iPlayer
43:59and face Lord Sugar himself in The Apprentice.
44:02That doesn't scare you.
44:03How about facing the schoolmums?
44:05Better bring your A-game to stand a chance in Amanda Land.
44:09APPLAUSE
44:09Thank you very much.
44:21APPLAUSE
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