- 2 minutes ago
American Classic S01E01 (2026)
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TVTranscript
00:05Oh
00:38yes
01:05any time
01:06yeah i know i know richard any time
01:17push me sorry sorry push me
01:35and let not women's weapons water drops stain my man's cheeks no you are natural
01:47you are natural hags i will have some
01:56i will have such revenges on you both
02:23it never gets any easier does it don't
02:28certainly never gets any easier to watch
02:30what's that mean the actress playing gondola that was an accent right yes norwegian
02:38was that not a problem was that not pointed out as a problem
02:42i mean i don't mean to be politically incorrect but what the king lear adopt it took me out of
02:48the
02:48plane took me right out of the plane as did the set no not what i would have done well
02:54we couldn't
02:54afford you could we well overall though you liked it and by it i mean you know who darling and
03:01you
03:01were wonderful the director should just get down on his knees and i wasn't pushing not at all
03:07there was no effort that's what was so effective you look so weak and sad and
03:13and broken you made me cry i'm sure anyone with a heart cried at the sight of that
03:20i i know you don't read reviews but no yeah no no no no holly i have no i have
03:26raves can you believe
03:28it raves across the board except for the new york times even the times yeah i don't believe
03:35no what is his name xerxes zander zander young young yeah i just i only skimmed the review but he
03:42he clearly loved it he said you were the anchor the anchor wow he has liked me in ten years
03:52he
03:52hasn't no here's the small victories we go somewhere quiet i can't bear this music you know we could
04:02talk about you know the play and my performance darling you cannot depend on your ex-wife for your
04:09social life anyway i'm here with david david my colorist no god no divorce lawyer david it's not a
04:17date he wanted to see the play i didn't want to come alone david uh david well that was a
04:29really
04:29excellent play yes i have no idea how you remember all those lines don't say that david only even say
04:36that look at the time wow i uh i have a um i've got a oh you see you see
04:44see what you've done
04:46sorry easy slow down cowboy take it easy down okay well hello everybody
05:02table for zander young mr young we have your table ready for you right this way
05:08can i uh here you are here you are enjoy
05:34um
05:45zander young yes richard bean i heard you liked my leer i agree with you i'm glad we're on the
05:54same page
05:54at last i can't talk to you why not i can't talk to you about what i write i'm afraid
06:00there are very
06:00strict rules journalistic ethics oh well i just wanted to swing by and tell you that uh
06:06i appreciate your support i've waited a long time for it but um truth be told i haven't been a
06:11fan of
06:12your writing for quite some time but i'm starting to like it now did you read the review troy no
06:19i had
06:20it summarized for me he loved the production he didn't like you troy i'm a little confused because he
06:26liked the production but he didn't like the leer i don't think that's possible do you know how much
06:31shit they sit through every we do not engage engaging center i am engaging okay i saw the show too
06:39and lifeless passionless uh yes i'm trying to process this i was told
06:47that he said i was the anchor like an anchor dragging the whole thing down
06:54that's very different we can't discuss this no of course not you can only slander me in print but not
07:00to my face it's not slander it's an opinion it's not an opinion it's a megaphone i have an opinion
07:09i think troy troy is too young for you but i'm not going to write a piece about her in
07:16the new york
07:16times because that would be rude do you know he used to love you he still talks about your hamlet
07:21at
07:22some little theater in pennsylvania wait a minute you came and saw my hamlet at the mft he wanted to
07:28see this kid that everyone was talking about and he thought that he'd seen the future of american
07:33theater we're leaving but that richard bean is long gone and now you're here on your own opening
07:39night a sad old man drinking alone troy a man more lost and defeated than king fucking lear
07:46there i just summarized the review for you you're welcome
07:57no regrets were you drunk no were you high no what i was was uh justifiably um miffed at a
08:09uh dismissive cruel review uh uh from a third-rate critic and that's why you attacked him and his
08:17husband and called them uh unnatural hags that's a quote from the play great there is a whole
08:24subreddit whatever the that is about you being a homophobe someone called it gay bashing i'm a
08:31broadway actor okay i'm i'm as gay as a man can be without actually being gay you know what i'm
08:36saying
08:37so you don't know you weren't there no i wasn't luckily there's video
08:44okay
08:47but they shall be the terrors of the earth you look
09:09why is the table on fire huh i don't know i must have left before any first responders showed up
09:16this is a viral shitshell richard because it's taken out of context i mean i'm not saying it's a
09:24deep fake but could we say it's a deep thing nah i'm gonna lean into the drugs and booze angle
09:31oh
09:32good our statement yeah but not an apology oh you're filled with remorse and regret and shame i'm not
09:41filled with any of those i told the critic the truth i have no remorse i feel no shame i'm
09:48a little
09:48embarrassed by the fact that i did launch into a verse of edelweiss because i was trying to diffuse
09:54the situation but uh apologies regret no so you write whatever you want to write i don't care i have
10:04to go
10:04to the theater why because i i thought maybe i'd do a matinee of king lear what the fuck no
10:12richard you
10:13have no matinee you have no evening performance either the producers are putting you on hiatus a
10:20forced hiatus while i clear this shit i have to be on that stage every performance are people gonna
10:26think what that you had some kind of public breakdown well you did richard you had a small
10:34involuntary mental collapse which i'm going to say was caused by mixing booze with medication you
10:39were taking for back pain i'm gonna need a month to clear this up maybe two in the meantime
10:47leave leave as in go somewhere else and i don't mean brooklyn i mean like a remote island another
10:54country another state at the very least so uh being banished from broadway for entertaining people
11:04that's what i do okay hello mom's dead who's this john john who your brother oh hi hi john
11:20that's my brother did you say mom's dead yes
11:29did she read the review
11:39he's coming tomorrow he cannot go to the theater promise me what do you want me to say i don't
11:47know
11:48say anything say it's being fumigated it's tented lie lie why did you have to tell him why did i
11:58tell him his mother died he has not seen her in three years
12:01the only person who cares about is himself you know that he just beat up a critic it's all over
12:05the
12:05internet it's literally the most narcissistic thing a person can do i won't deal with him i can't let
12:11handle his crap right now he's gonna come back here he's gonna intone all over the place just in case
12:18you forgot we are so financially fucked what is that a bijou oh no no no no you cannot you
12:29cannot climb me
12:29with alcohol i feel so bad for your dad i know you don't
12:39oh sweet jesus i don't know how you do it it's about how you express the
12:46how the two of you came from the same parents i will never understand
12:51richard has to pay for the funeral
12:55i'll ask him no no you will tell him you will look him in the eye
13:02keep him away from the theater
13:37good you're here
13:41good you're here
13:44hard to be
13:45oh thanks
13:50wow changed a bit huh
13:56god look at this everything everything's closed yeah well times are tough struggling like everywhere else
14:05still feels like home i love to swing by the theater no no that's not the
14:10yeah i've got it let's go to dad for a minute i have to stand on that stage you know
14:14i need the
14:15inspiration let let no richard let's just you know let's focus on mom and dad today okay come on
14:21take you home okay you can get set sure you're right yeah i'm glad she went quickly
14:26no she didn't actually no she was sick for a while
14:30i just saw her last spring no
14:33yes i brought her that awesome check from harris no no that was three years ago
14:37three years three years three years this is me how's dad taking it well he's uh coping but you know
14:47it's hard
14:57you need help with the funeral oh i'll take care of it i'll stage something
15:04theatrical but discreet death will be the theme but it can't be all about death it'll also be
15:09uplifting but appropriately depressing music has to be there quintet maybe i meant paying for it
15:17i know it's asking a lot and i hate doing it but maybe it'll help you with the guilt i
15:23hope you're feeling for not having seen her in all the wisdom
15:40that's what's going on
15:54hey here here you go you're not coming in no i would but look i got a crazy afternoon
16:00miranda's there she'll uh set you up miranda great
16:04there's a lot of time with dad it's like two peas those two it's nice so i love seeing you
16:10i'm not here hey hey come by tonight i'll make you dinner oh great i'll stop by the theater
16:17on the way no don't don't do that just spend time with that okay i'll come by and get you
16:23great oh and
16:26richard don't tell dad about the uh the thing with mom what thing the death thing that she's dead he
16:34doesn't know you don't want to sort of figure that out when he sees her in the coffin just don't
16:40okay
16:40it'll upset him he won't know how to process it and this is a longer conversation just he'll love
16:45seeing you okay just enjoy each other okay i'll see you later
17:00dad
17:05veranda
17:10veranda
17:15dad
17:25dad
17:31it's richard
17:34richard my son my star come on up wait i'll put something on i don't want to frighten you
17:44oh
17:52I'm a mess.
17:56I didn't know you were coming.
17:57I wanted to surprise you.
18:00You have been working very hard.
18:03Oh, yes.
18:04Look at this gentleman here.
18:07Who is he?
18:08No, I know it's hard without the hair.
18:11It's, uh...
18:12You did his earnest at MFT.
18:15Oh, Christ.
18:17Oscar Wilde, if I never breathed.
18:19You see that?
18:21Yeah, Dad, I'm sorry I've been away so long.
18:24Well, you're here now.
18:25Sit.
18:30You were only 23 years old when you did it.
18:34Earnest, I mean.
18:35That was the same year as we did much ado.
18:39So, have you two tied the knot yet?
18:42We two?
18:43You and Kristen.
18:45Kristen is married to John.
18:48But how does that work with both of you in New York?
18:52She's here.
18:52I'm in New York.
18:54Huh.
18:56This papiocca pudding.
18:58So, tell us.
19:00How are things on the Great White Way?
19:03Oh, they're great.
19:04In fact, I just opened there in King Lear.
19:08Lear?
19:08Did you hear that, Bill?
19:12Why should a dog, a horse, a rat have life, and thou no breath at all?
19:19Thou shalt come no more.
19:22Never, never, never, never, never, never.
19:28How were the reviews?
19:30They were all raised, raised.
19:33Do you remember our Lear?
19:35You as Edmund, John as Edgar.
19:39You boys were terrific.
19:41And Ethel as Regan.
19:43She was terrifying.
19:45I built a theater.
19:47Best in the country.
19:49But this is what I'm most proud of.
19:53My eldest.
19:54My artist.
19:56And if I play my cards right, I'll talk him into doing another play here with me soon.
20:02The two of us.
20:03Together again.
20:04You think about that.
20:05I will.
20:06I will.
20:08There's something that I want to say, and I don't want you to respond to it.
20:14But I just want you to sit there and listen to me.
20:17Sure.
20:18Oh.
20:19Boy, this is harder than I thought it would be, and I don't know why.
20:25Here goes.
20:29I'm gay.
20:32Oh.
20:33I'm a gay man.
20:34I was always a gay man.
20:36But I just never allowed myself to be one.
20:40But now, in the twilight of my years,
20:42I'm motivated to tie up loose ends.
20:45Now, I want you to understand that this is not the dementia talking.
20:51Okay.
20:53I'm gay.
20:54I'm a gay man.
20:55I've always been a gay man.
20:57But now, in my twilight years, I...
21:04Didn't I say that already?
21:06You did, Dad.
21:07Yeah.
21:08That's the dementia.
21:10Well, I think that's wonderful, Dad.
21:12I'm so happy for you.
21:13I knew you would understand.
21:16Have you told John yet?
21:17Oh, hell no.
21:18I can't tell him anything.
21:20He worries.
21:21He thinks I'm losing my mind.
21:24Oh.
21:25There's one more thing.
21:26You must promise me something, Richard.
21:27You must promise me.
21:29I...
21:29What?
21:30You won't tell your mother.
21:34I won't.
21:46Uncle Richard?
21:50Oh, my God.
21:54You're a little grown-up.
21:56Don't cry.
21:57No, no, no, no, no.
21:58Please, if you start crying, I'll start crying.
22:00No, no, no.
22:02This is miserable.
22:03Well, we all do.
22:04Yes, I know.
22:05God, I'm so glad you're here.
22:08Are you okay?
22:09Well, I know.
22:10She had a good life.
22:11No, I meant with the review and the whole thing with the critic.
22:15All of that?
22:16Yes, well, um...
22:18You know, I'm kind of surprised it actually didn't happen after the Beckett.
22:21I actually managed to repress that one.
22:24Yeah, thanks for reminding me.
22:25How do you know about all that?
22:27Mom forwards me all your reviews.
22:29Really?
22:30What's that about?
22:31She's trying to discourage me, I think.
22:33From what?
22:34Being happy, I guess.
22:37I never had more fun than when I went to visit you in New York.
22:40Nana would take me to see her shows.
22:42You came a lot, yes, didn't you?
22:44Wait a minute.
22:44You were a child?
22:45What were you, eight when you came to see Virginia Woolf?
22:47I was so scared, but I loved it.
22:49I loved all of it.
22:51All the actors and shows and the parties.
22:54It was magic.
22:55How many funny shows did you actually see?
22:57A lot.
22:58Really?
22:59Yeah, because that was the one place she saw you.
23:02She had to die for you to come back.
23:05Don't say that.
23:07That's not true.
23:13It is true.
23:14I'm an asshole.
23:16Only sometimes.
23:18Oh, yeah.
23:21Anyway, I think I want to live in New York.
23:24Oh?
23:25I remember you said if I want to be an actress, I should be there.
23:28And I can help you.
23:29Really?
23:31There are calls I can make, strings I can pull.
23:34Maybe not as many strings as before.
23:37I saw the video.
23:40Behold, I have a weapon!
23:43Maybe.
23:44But still, don't rush to New York.
23:46You've got a perfect opportunity right here in Millisburg.
23:49You've got a theater in your backyard.
23:50It's where I learned everything I know about acting.
23:53At the Millisburg Festival Theater.
23:55It was the perfect place to start a career.
23:58When I played Hamlet, the acoustics and such, whatever it is, it's magical because it was
24:03a communal experience, you know what I mean?
24:10Have you been to the theater?
24:11About yet.
24:13You should go.
24:19All babies.
24:25All babies.
24:27All babies.
24:29All babies.
25:08Put aside your worries
25:10You won't have a care when the doorbell rings
25:14And the Matza Man is there
25:16It's no wonder he gets so many calls
25:19No one can resist my Matza boss
25:24He's the Matza, Matza, Matza Man
25:28You're in love with the Matza Man
25:32Matza, Matza, Matza Man
25:34He's lots of hot, so muscle with the Matza Man
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