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Love & Marriage: Huntsville - Season 10 Episode 19 -Motor City, Here We Come
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00:00Previously on Love & Marriage Huntsville.
00:03As a friend, you have to be like,
00:05OK, I can receive how I made you feel.
00:07Did I not do that on a winery trip?
00:09Obviously, because we have this bad energy right now.
00:13I don't know what more you want me to do.
00:14And I'm not groveling and kissing ass.
00:17I know I've been on this journey looking
00:18for my brothers and sisters, right?
00:20Yeah.
00:20I found them, so guess what I'm doing?
00:23What?
00:23I'm going to Detroit.
00:2527 years, I've never even seen these kids before.
00:28After all of that at the Mexican restaurant,
00:30Kimmy was like, we'll go to Detroit.
00:31We'll hold your hand.
00:32Like, they kind of invited themselves.
00:34I was just like, ah.
00:35Destiny is a friend to everybody.
00:37It's choosing different, different sides.
00:39And Tisha's like, I can't trust that.
00:40Two seconds later, she's like, but Destiny's going to Detroit
00:44to find her family, and I want to go with her.
00:46Kimmy said that she was going to support her.
00:48Wait, you're going?
00:49You're not going?
00:49I was going to see where you was at.
00:51How would you describe the relationship
00:53between you and Tricia?
00:55I'm asking a simple question.
00:56And in her mind, it's an accusation.
00:58He will pull the covers back and be like,
01:00who's been sleeping in the bed?
01:01Or somebody been in the bed.
01:02What?
01:02She's a compulsive liar.
01:04She lies about a lot of stuff.
01:09We keep it moving all day, all night, yeah.
01:14Ain't no stopping us.
01:16Drop that.
01:18We ain't stopping.
01:19You know, you know.
01:22We keep it moving all day, all night, yeah.
01:32Yeah.
01:33Yeah.
01:33All day, all night, yeah.
01:36Ain't no stopping us.
01:40Yeah.
01:44She lies about a lot of stuff.
01:46She lies about a lot of stuff.
01:47She lies about a lot of stuff.
01:48This is real deal scenarios.
01:49I've never been an insecure person to be like, oh,
01:52when you're at the gym, a bed is squeaky.
01:53Yes, he has.
01:54A bed doesn't exist in a gym.
01:56You will sleep and woke up out of your sleep.
01:58Listen, let me talk, bro.
01:59You always got to.
02:00It's like you're going to throw me under the bus all the time.
02:02No, he just pointed to me.
02:03And that's the thing.
02:04When it's time to throw me under the bus, you'll do it.
02:05When it's time to defend me, you don't.
02:09We both do have anger issues.
02:11It's the same.
02:12This is what it's doing.
02:13Now, I'm told lies.
02:14I'm not perfect.
02:15I'm not going to sit here and act like I've never lied.
02:17But at the same time, it's like,
02:18I just don't understand Trisha's lies because they're not that deep.
02:21Like, they're not things that would
02:24hinder us or hurt us.
02:26So it also makes me wonder, like, well,
02:29if you're lying about this, like,
02:32there has to be something else that you're lying about
02:34and you would never tell me.
02:36Why don't we talk about what's attracting both of you
02:40to each other and what's keeping you with each other?
02:44So I'm going to let you go first.
02:49Well, I think you are a great person.
02:53I think it's the fun that we can have, that we used to have,
02:58that I know we could have, that I'm hoping to get back to, I guess.
03:03Because, yeah, we're like two fun-ass people together.
03:07The kids love you, I love you.
03:10It's just, it's a hurdle we've got to get past.
03:14Well, I missed that part, too.
03:16I ain't going to lie, we've definitely had some amazing times.
03:19I think more or less, like, we just have to stop letting outside stuff
03:24affect what goes on in our household.
03:26Stop letting other people control the mindset and the dynamic of our household.
03:31We're not the only ones going through stuff.
03:33Those kids are going through it, too.
03:36I already said I'm not arguing anymore.
03:37Hmm?
03:38I already said I'm not arguing anymore.
03:42She's not arguing.
03:45Now, I just started this a couple of days ago.
03:47My daughter was like, she just, she said, I get time, you're not arguing.
03:51The kids are definitely noticing the, um, energy between Ken and I.
03:57They always keep coming to me like, no, we want you guys to get back to where we were in
04:01the beginning.
04:02Whatever y'all got to do, y'all can fix this.
04:03That's Xavier's favorite word.
04:04I don't care what it is, y'all can fix this.
04:06So, I'm just willing to work on whatever we need to work on to fix it.
04:10You do love your kids, right?
04:12Yeah.
04:13So, if you do love your kids, since the kids are always going to be in the middle of you
04:18and Kenny,
04:18both of y'all are going to have to get it together and create that safe space for your kids.
04:24Otherwise, they will leave the house and start looking for a safe place out there with somebody else.
04:32We can't keep feuding back and forth because at the end of the day, it all affects the kids.
04:36The kids are in the middle of everything.
04:38Yeah, I totally agree with what we were talking about.
04:41We're going to shut it down now.
04:42I want you, sir, to make a promise to Trish in terms of whatever it is that you are willing
04:51to do regardless of her behavior.
04:57I love you enough to be better with how I communicate with you.
05:02All right.
05:03Are you good with that, Trish?
05:05Yes.
05:06What are you going to say?
05:09Kenny, I love you enough to hug you more.
05:15Tell you I love you more.
05:17That's it.
05:18That's it.
05:19That's it.
05:20Do that.
05:22Tell him you love him and hug him.
05:25Communicate more effectively.
05:27And we're going to move along from there, okay, to make sure that this relationship works well.
05:31I think Kenny and I have been through so much these last couple of months.
05:36So it's like, you still have that feeling of what frustrates you.
05:43So I do try.
05:46But, yeah, I'm still working.
05:49Well, I don't know about you all, but I'm going to drink to this.
05:53It's just water.
06:05Last night, we arrived to my hometown, Detroit.
06:09This trip is going to be really emotional.
06:16I absolutely feel that at this time in life, that reconnecting with my siblings and connecting
06:20with the ones that I never met is very important.
06:30I was 4 or 5 when the police took my brother and I away from my mother, and it was
06:35the last
06:36time that I lived with her.
06:43My mother had six children after Terrell and I, and the rest of my siblings were all adopted
06:47into great families.
06:49And it took years for me to find my siblings.
06:51Over 10 years.
06:59Good morning.
07:02How's it doing?
07:03Good.
07:03How can I have this?
07:04You cold?
07:04Yes, always.
07:06I got you.
07:07I'm trying to find an outfit for today.
07:10How you feeling about today?
07:11I'm excited, nervous, but mainly excited.
07:16You know, first time.
07:17To meet your siblings, your grandmother, your aunties, your cousins.
07:22All of them.
07:23I think, I mean, I've already had an introduction online, so that's been very interesting.
07:28And grandma is excited.
07:30Oh, grandma's way too excited.
07:31Way too excited.
07:32She's ready.
07:33She's like, every day from when I was coming.
07:35I'm just really trying to figure out today, like, my nerves are a little bad, just a little
07:38bit, a little shot, and I feel like I'm the wrangler since I'm the oldest.
07:45Yeah.
07:48Who is it?
07:49Room service.
07:50We didn't order no room service.
07:52How are you?
07:54Room service, y'all coming to service.
07:56We're coming to check on you.
07:58I am happy to see the Scots, and I feel like, you know, the support is what it is, based
08:05on the parameters of our relationship at this point.
08:09I appreciate them, and it's cool to have them here.
08:14You know, it's cool to have them here.
08:15And nobody's really been linked up.
08:18Yeah.
08:18It's our third time, though.
08:19Now.
08:20Right.
08:20Oh, yeah.
08:21Yeah, we in there.
08:22They're y'all sisters in BFS.
08:23Every year, my grandmother would literally post on Facebook pictures of them and her telephone
08:29number.
08:30That's how they were real.
08:31Like, call me if you know who this is.
08:34Like, she was trying to find them.
08:35Oh, wow.
08:35That's dope.
08:36Yeah.
08:37My grandmother's been looking for grandchildren for 27 years.
08:41What about your mom?
08:42Are you going to see your mom, too?
08:44Y'all mom?
08:46No?
08:46No.
08:47So what does that look for?
08:49No, he don't want to, or no, it's not going to happen?
08:53Well, she's getting, she's getting teary eyes.
08:57Sometimes, I have an expectation of her showing up, and then she just doesn't.
09:02So, I don't know, because I'm the only one out of all the siblings that have ever been
09:08raised by her.
09:08Everybody else has been adopted and not, so I have, like, a different relationship.
09:13Yeah.
09:13Mm-hmm.
09:14That's why we're here to help you through this process.
09:17How can we be here for you?
09:20Like, how can we be that?
09:21This, like, initial meeting with the siblings and everybody meeting, my grandmother's going
09:26to be, like, kind of intimate.
09:28But I think we're going to do something later where we bring everybody together, and I would
09:32love for y'all to be here.
09:33Okay.
09:33We can do that.
09:34Just keep us in the loop.
09:36I am just overwhelmed a little bit.
09:39You know, I don't really show it outwardly a lot, but on the inside, it's, like, fireworks
09:42going off.
09:45Are y'all going to go with her to see?
09:48Well, we told her we wanted to be there however she needed us to be there.
09:52Mm-hmm.
09:52I think the initial meet was going to just be with family.
09:55And so we told her that, like, after that was done, like, if she wanted to link up,
10:00you know, we would go out and...
10:02Mm-hmm.
10:02Like, I'm...
10:03It doesn't seem like on my face, but I'm almost getting emotional about that, just thinking
10:07and putting myself in there.
10:08Seriously.
10:08My heart would be beating through my chest.
10:10Exactly.
10:11Every second.
10:12And I don't want nobody around.
10:14Hmm.
10:15Although Destiny and I have had our disagreement, I think that as friends, you step up and you
10:20be there for them, especially when they need you.
10:22So, no matter what has happened with us in the past, this is a moment that I want to
10:26make sure that I am here for her.
10:28If she needs me, and if she don't need me, I'm still here.
10:31I guess for me, I feel like to a degree, I've been there.
10:35Going through the breast cancer and people not knowing what to say.
10:40Yeah.
10:40Like, should I go to her house or should I not go to her house?
10:44Yeah.
10:45You know?
10:45Like, I didn't know what I needed at that time, but at the end of the day, I needed my
10:50friends.
10:51Mm-hmm.
10:51And my friends are the things that mattered the most during that time frame.
10:56You know what I'm saying?
10:57You got to kind of take yourself out of that comfort zone for your friends sometime and
11:01just be there.
11:02Yep.
11:02Yep.
11:03So, have y'all talked to Uncle Rick and Daddy and y'all got that squared away?
11:07I mean, they knew that we were coming up.
11:09We haven't...
11:10We haven't...
11:11I mean, it's early in the day, right?
11:12Today, we're going to go to Pontiac and we're going to see everybody.
11:16My dad, my Uncle Rick.
11:17It's our turn now to reunite with family.
11:21We need to schedule two more seats, though.
11:23I need to change the reservation to, you know, plus two.
11:27Dag!
11:28So, you're trying to say me and Kim are just popping up in the day, right now?
11:30No, no, no.
11:31I didn't know you were...
11:32All right.
11:33Hey, hey, Siri, cancel the...
11:35If you believe Marceau's at reservations...
11:37Hello?
11:38Hello.
11:39Right there.
11:41Cancel the stippers.
11:43Coming up on Love & Marriage Huntsville...
11:46What's up, Pops?
11:47Welcome Rick.
11:49My God.
11:49What's going on?
11:50My God.
11:54Yowzers.
11:57I'm trying not to have, like, an anxiety attack.
11:59Like, my heart is beat or something.
12:18I'm going to meet all of my siblings in the same room at one time.
12:23And my family, it's overwhelming.
12:28Since my brother died, I felt alone in the world.
12:31Finding my siblings, it just felt like...
12:36We're all coming together and there's more of a complete world for me now.
12:44We're on our way.
12:45I know.
12:48This could be cool.
12:50Grandma's so cute, I can't wait to see her.
12:52No, literally.
12:53Texting me.
12:54Talking about waiting to see you.
12:56Counting down.
12:58Right.
12:58She been waiting for this moment.
13:01My baby sister, Paula, I call her PJ.
13:06This has got to be a lot, you know?
13:08She never met her family.
13:10She never met her mom.
13:11She never met her grandmother.
13:11Like, so all I can do is support her, but she doesn't know she's more support for me.
13:18You're about to see a lot of people.
13:21How many people are going to get there?
13:22I have no idea.
13:24I can't even really kill you.
13:26For real.
13:28Yeah.
13:31Well.
13:32Well, it's a lot of us, so...
13:33No, no, she's like my Uncle Terry and all the...
13:36I'm like the guy.
13:39Jessie.
13:39I'm just worried about...
13:40Just how you know I'm a big sister.
13:42Now you're a big sister?
13:43I'm worried about...
13:43Now you see how I feel.
13:45I'm worried about my little brother.
13:46Like, oh my God.
13:48I'm like, where?
13:48Are you okay?
13:49How are you doing?
13:50Let me take a seat.
13:51Did he say, where y'all at?
13:53No.
13:53No, he didn't say nothing back, actually.
13:56I just thought that we were on our way.
13:58I think it's...
13:59It's important for me to be able to give the attention that I need to my newfound siblings
14:04and balancing them meeting all the family, because the only person they really know
14:08or have had communication with is me.
14:11As I'm processing it, all I can think about, and I guess this is what big siblings do,
14:16older siblings do, is like, how are they feeling?
14:44Come on.
14:46Come on.
14:48Hey everybody.
14:49Hi grandma.
14:50How are you guys?
14:51Hi grandma.
14:52Hi, Laura, you look so cute.
14:54Hi, Paula, come here, girl, give me the love.
14:58Walking in and seeing my family together,
15:00it feels so good to see people that share the same DNA,
15:05same fat cheeks.
15:10I'm really, I'm really elated to see all my family
15:13in one room.
15:14I love, love, love my family.
15:19Hey, Deva.
15:20Hi.
15:21Hey, pretty lady.
15:24Bringing all of us together is not only emotional for me,
15:29it's emotional for my grandmother,
15:30because she's been looking for my siblings for almost 30 years.
15:35And, you know, being able to bring us all together
15:39is nothing but God.
15:41Go, Ram.
15:42Hi.
15:45Aw, don't cry.
15:47Yes, you do, baby.
15:48Don't cry.
15:49Aw.
15:50It's so good to see you.
15:52You too.
15:54I knew she was going to cry.
15:56Don't make me cry.
15:56I knew you was going to cry.
15:58Don't make me cry.
16:00Look at her.
16:00That's something.
16:02You ain't never cry.
16:04You happy?
16:05Aw, thank you, Grandma.
16:07Aw.
16:08Aw.
16:09Aw.
16:10It's amazing, ain't it?
16:11It's been a long time coming.
16:13Mama looked for y'all for years, you know, you know, um, every year Mama would post pictures
16:21on Facebook of the kids like, hey, I'm Annie Mae Sears, please reach out for years. But, um,
16:32Destiny was persistent.
16:36Mama had a telephone number and Destiny did the research. That one telephone number
16:43got us to Paula. Amazing journey. Don't you look like your sister?
16:50I look alike. Walk alike. I know, I'm like, I used to wonder, like, who do I look like? That
16:55was,
16:55like, the main things I was wondering, like, who do I look like? Just like Ronda, don't she?
17:03Yeah, that's a whole nother amazing story to tell. What, Ronda? Yeah, Ronda. My sister,
17:11as a, uh, young girl, I, I admire her so much. Cause she was the prettiest woman I ever seen
17:17before in my life. She was that deal. She came through in a limousine with her top hats and her
17:24two-piece miniskirt suit. Oh, wait a minute, who was? Your mother was that deal. She, she was in,
17:32uh, motorcycle clubs. Um, she worked at different bars. That's what my dad said. He, he met her in
17:38the bar singing. I still pray for my sister daily with her daily struggles, you know. She got caught
17:44up in a time where drugs just came out. Only the strong survived with that epidemic, you know.
17:53The best decision she made was not to raise her children, because no telling where they
17:58would be. Exactly. Looking at Jessie and, um, Paula, Alan, Nisha, I'm so proud. You don't know where
18:07they would be if they still would've been the care of their mother. She left them. Cause she knew she
18:12couldn't take care of them. She and Nisha had the long talk. She told Nisha. What'd she tell you,
18:17Nisha? She said that she basically just didn't want to bring us into her lifestyle.
18:24To hear my mom's siblings and family talk about her past and, you know, her just being this beautiful
18:32woman, but to know that she had a life prior to her issues, it's, it's beautiful to hear,
18:38but it's also sad at the same time. I'm supposed to talk to Rhonda Jo today, our mother, our bio
18:45mom,
18:45as Jessie says, and Paula. Um, and I want to know how y'all feel about possibly going with me
18:54to talk to her and meet her for the first time. I know you just said this morning I wasn't
19:01prepared
19:01for that, that you want to meet her, and that's changed. I don't mind. You don't mind. Cause at
19:06first it was a strong no, and Jessie was a strong no. You still a no? Yeah, I'm good. Why
19:12you don't
19:13want to see her? I just feel like I don't need to. Like I ain't got nothing to say to
19:17her for real.
19:19You got to respect that. And it's a lot. So Jessie not wanting to meet my mother, I, I can
19:25understand. She, she's a handful and he's protecting himself and setting boundaries on what he feels he
19:31can handle. So I had to respect that. Paula wanted to meet Rhonda on the other hand. It concerns me
19:35because she's a pistol. Um, but I have to support my sister. Everybody else's experience is different
19:42cause that's y'all sister. That's your daughter. Like, but to be her child is different. It's
19:49different. It has to be. And then especially for me, cause I'm one of the ones that she actually
19:54had and we got taken away. So when y'all talk about her, it's kind of hard to see her
20:01in the light
20:01that y'all see her in, unfortunately.
20:14Coming up on Love and Maritons Field. How you been feeling today? Pissed but good.
20:19Why you been there? Well, I can't discuss that. That's family business. I up enough.
20:26This is challenging. This is rough. Like, do I really want to do this? Do I really want to be
20:34this vulnerable?
20:46Everything was different on this street. Yeah. You can tell when you're coming down
20:49Telegraph when you get to Pontiac. You feel a little bump in the road like this. Well, I'm still
20:5340 of them.
20:57Welcome to Pontiac. Yeah.
20:59Look. This is the first house that reached to learn how to lay side.
21:04Yeah. You see it right there? That was a great house.
21:07I love going down memory lane. I mean, this is, these are the streets that I walked. This is what
21:13built us. And, you know, ooh, look at that. And even when I'm just telling them about what's
21:18going on, I'm really just thinking out loud. Like, I remember that. You know, and there's so many
21:22different things that we forgot and that really actually shaped us from the time that we were
21:26the kids' age and, well, you know, what we used to do. And it's like, dang, you know,
21:31what would I say to that little boy? What would I say if I saw them? So it's always cool
21:34just
21:35taking the job down memory lane.
21:37Uncle Rick. So is he the one that got y'all started in construction or is he like your dad?
21:42Our dad did. Like, we was always on some project that he had going on coming up.
21:48Yeah.
21:48Like, underneath houses, helping him with HVAC, in basements, doing plumbing.
21:55I would say Uncle Rick developed our eye into the more interior design aspect of it and
22:00what you can do with, you know, with the tools and stuff around you. But, you know,
22:05Pop's got us into construction.
22:06Right.
22:06One thing I liked about my dad is that his work always looked so professional when he finished.
22:12When he finished, it always looked good. That was one thing that always impressed me about it.
22:16He had a higher standard. Like, listen, when you do something, make sure you do it right.
22:21Make sure it's done well.
22:24Uncle Rick and my dad, um, they've put a lot into us. They weren't perfect role models,
22:28but ultimately, I look at a lot of the things that I do and I see the excellence that they
22:33put
22:33inside us. I'm really excited to go and see Uncle Rick's school because I can know that the next
22:38generation, they're going to be getting some good stuff.
22:41Hey, Reece, you ever been to, uh, Uncle Rick's school?
22:44Mm-hmm. They just started that not that long ago.
22:47Not long ago.
22:48I think it might be a year or less than a year.
22:50How many students does he have?
22:51I think this might be a second or third batch of students.
22:54He was saying when he was coming up, the building trades was, like, 36% African-American. He said it's
23:02down to, like, 6%.
23:05Yeah.
23:06He said the numbers are, like, staggeringly low, but it's a trade that, you know, building will never go anywhere.
23:12It'll never go anywhere. You're always going to need it. You're always going to have a job.
23:15As long as you got a trade, you always got a job.
23:25All right, all right, all right.
23:29Uncle Rick!
23:31Hey!
23:32Come on.
23:32Come on, man.
23:34You ain't missing no meals, baby.
23:36No, no, no. I'm eating.
23:37You are.
23:39You are.
23:40I swear.
23:41You're still with this guy.
23:45I still am.
23:46Hi.
23:47Hi, guys.
23:48How you doing?
23:49Good.
23:49How are you?
23:50Uncle Rick, my God.
23:52What's going on, my God?
23:54You guys.
23:55I'm really excited to be back in Pontiac, you know, catching up with my dad, Uncle Rick.
23:59What's up, pops?
24:01Uncle Rick's been in my life, I think, my whole life.
24:05I don't remember, you know, a time where he wasn't, like, around.
24:08I love Uncle Rick because he loves me.
24:15What's that?
24:15Dad, what is that?
24:17What's the end?
24:18The bougie kiss.
24:19I'm excited to just come up here and just hang out with Uncle Rick, with pops, just,
24:23you know, just me to see all the people, man.
24:26You gonna show us around?
24:27I'm really excited to see Uncle Rick, Dad, Dex, just buddy, everybody.
24:32Yeah.
24:33Uncle Rick's school looks very impressive.
24:35Like, it reminds me of the future Marcel.
24:37Yeah.
24:38I can see that.
24:39It's pretty cool.
24:39We initially started, we were going to bring the high school kids and teach them, but they
24:45actually have a facility.
24:47The biggest issue that we have right now is if you're 29, 39, 49, in some cases, we have
24:54guys applying to the academy at 59.
24:56Mm-hmm.
24:57What is life like at 40 with no skill set?
25:00And I said, we're going to fix that.
25:0230 days, you can build a house.
25:04And guess what?
25:04The mindset changes.
25:05And they're learning from the best, man.
25:07Hello.
25:09Are you teaching them design, too?
25:10Like, some of your, you know, your special sauce.
25:14I think that's a gift.
25:16I don't think you teach that so much.
25:19I think that's a gift.
25:20And I'm blessed just to have the gift.
25:21I'm not quite sure what's going on with Daddy Scott right this second.
25:25He usually is a little bit more participant.
25:28He usually is a little bit more vocal and not so standoffish.
25:32I'm not quite sure.
25:33Maybe it's because we're here to see Uncle Rick.
25:37I don't know.
25:37I'm not quite sure.
25:38But I do think it's something that we need to get to the bottom of.
25:43Next on Love and Marriage Hotsfield.
25:45You don't have nothing you want to say to any of us?
25:48You got something you want to say to me?
25:49I don't know.
25:51Hi, children.
25:53When I became a non-compensated employee for the federal government,
26:00I asked my kids, well, why didn't you write me?
26:04Why didn't you send cards or whatever?
26:06And Marceau said, I didn't know, we didn't know you.
26:10Oh.
26:17I'm coming to see my mother.
26:20I'm just overwhelmed.
26:23This is challenging.
26:25This is rough.
26:30I'm not really sure how the cameras are going to affect my mom and I's conversation.
26:35Like, do I really want to do this?
26:37Do I really want to be this vulnerable?
26:40Do I really want this interaction to be shared with the world?
26:43I mean, just to be real honest.
26:45And I go back with, you know, feeling embarrassed sometimes and, but then I have to, like, really
26:51sit in what I talked about in therapy, which is, like, we're two different people.
26:55Like, our paths are very, very different.
26:59And, you know, she is her own person, even though I'm her daughter and I'm an extension
27:02of her because she birthed me.
27:04Um, I have to really sit in that.
27:06So it's just, it's just a lot of emotions.
27:10Yowzers.
27:12Drop beats.
27:14Trying not to have, like, anxiety.
27:15Like, hard beats or something.
27:18This is a big moment.
27:20Um, and it's a very vulnerable moment.
27:23And I'm, I'm also juggling the feelings of my siblings and just how it is going to go.
27:31I don't know how she's going to act because she can, she can cut up.
27:35Almost feeling responsible for her behavior.
27:57Hey.
27:58Hey.
27:59Hey.
28:02Hello.
28:03Hey, y'all.
28:04Hey.
28:08I, um, am very shocked because I haven't seen her this thin before.
28:13I mean, she's always been a tall, lean woman, not really heavy, but she's just, um,
28:21I don't know, it's kind of, like, alarming.
28:24Destiny.
28:25Hello.
28:26How you been?
28:28Oh, making it.
28:30Hmm?
28:31This is your daughter, Paula?
28:32Oh, did I say?
28:34How does it feel to see your daughter?
28:36It's good to see you.
28:37You as well.
28:38No, I ain't seen you since first.
28:40It's just...
28:40Yeah.
28:41I don't know what to say.
28:43That's okay.
28:43You look just like me.
28:45Yeah.
28:45No, I, I see now.
28:47Yeah.
28:47What everyone is doing.
28:48And you look like your daddy.
28:49Actually, actually, your father just passed.
28:53I'm just thinking, man, lady, like, can you have a softer touch a little bit?
28:59Like, it just seems like she's so disassociated from, um, from just life.
29:09And it took her a minute to even realize that that's her daughter sitting there that she's
29:13never, she hasn't seen since she, you know, gave her away.
29:17You remember when we got taken away?
29:20Yeah, because I had walked by y'all, but y'all said y'all was in a squad car.
29:23And I'm going to get y'all from Denver.
29:25We saw you when we was leaving the neighborhood.
29:27And we was like, there go our mama, and they just kept driving.
29:29The life that I was living, I couldn't have you in that life.
29:32Not that I want, didn't want to.
29:34Anything's going to happen, it depends on me.
29:36So I gave my mama, you know what I'm saying?
29:39It gave me more leeway to mess up, not having my children, because they were already taken
29:44care of.
29:45Why not?
29:46You know?
29:46I felt like I had nothing to live for a lot of time.
29:53I struggle with, um, the thought of her just, you know, making the right decision.
29:59Because the right decision to me would be, get clean, get your kids.
30:04So I don't know how y'all feel, but y'all can express how you feel.
30:07It's okay.
30:07You don't have nothing you want to say to any of us?
30:11What am I supposed to say?
30:12I don't know.
30:13Hi, children.
30:15You got something you want to say to me?
30:18No, I think I said enough.
30:19You made me some promises, then I called you.
30:21You said, I don't know what you're talking about.
30:22So I don't care, Justin.
30:23I made you some promises?
30:25Look, I'm not going to go through this emotional rollercoaster that I'm already going through.
30:28What promises did I make you that I didn't?
30:31Nothing.
30:32Exactly.
30:33Right.
30:33Because I didn't make no promises.
30:35You said, yeah, I'll come help you.
30:37When I told you I was going through my stuff, yeah, I'll come help you.
30:40I talked to you over several days.
30:41And what did you do?
30:43What did I do about what?
30:43Went back and got on the streets.
30:45I can't do this.
30:45I'm not on those streets.
30:46I live in a house.
30:47Whatever.
30:48Whatever.
30:49You live.
30:49Whatever.
30:49You got your reaction.
30:51So you're doing you and your daddy.
30:52So leave me alone.
30:53I got it.
30:54Right.
30:55You doing you and your daddy's about you and Tony.
30:57It ain't about me.
30:58You got this money.
30:58Can you help your mama?
31:00No.
31:01What you want me to help you do?
31:02Give me an apartment and I'll pay my own rent.
31:05I get my own.
31:06I got my own income.
31:07You got all this money.
31:07You know what I'm talking about?
31:08The entitlement.
31:09Look, what did you do, brother?
31:11Or anybody else.
31:12I did.
31:12Tell me where I'm done.
31:14It's Paula.
31:15It's a very nice to meet you.
31:16Pleased to meet you.
31:17Thank you for coming, Rhonda.
31:19You got something to eat.
31:20You ignoring me now?
31:21Oh, okay.
31:22Yeah.
31:22We done.
31:24We done.
31:26Yeah.
31:27I'm always talking about your daddy.
31:36I'm done.
31:40Coming up on Love and Marriage Huntsville.
31:42Regardless of how we go back and forth.
31:46We don't go back and forth.
31:47You go back and forth.
31:48Your daddy is crazy.
31:49You always tell me about your daddy.
31:51You're talking to me.
31:51Yeah, I'm talking to you.
31:52You're talking to me.
31:52Yeah, I'm talking to you.
31:53I just want to say this to you.
31:55I love you.
31:56And I just want you to know that.
31:59You got a funny way of showing it.
32:14Hey, Dad.
32:16Hey, girl.
32:16Hey.
32:17Hey, Sugar.
32:17How are you?
32:18I'm okay.
32:20I'm not with this.
32:22We need some tea.
32:23Right.
32:24We need some tea.
32:25Tea?
32:26Come on.
32:26Come on.
32:26Come on.
32:27Come on.
32:27Come on.
32:27Come on.
32:29Marzo and Maurice are going to scoot over to the school with Uncle Rick.
32:32Kind of do a little tour.
32:34I think Tisha and I are going to hang back and talk to Daddy Scott.
32:38See if we can kind of see what's going on.
32:41How you been feeling today?
32:44Pissed but good.
32:46Why you been business?
32:47Well, I can't discuss that.
32:48That's family business.
32:49We family.
32:50Well, once for a thing for sure.
32:52Once you say it, you can't un-say it.
32:53And once you do it, you can't undo it.
32:55That's true.
32:56Words are very powerful.
32:57And I live by that.
32:58Okay.
32:59You know, I can't get blood from a turnip.
33:00I can only get what you give me, friend.
33:02But listen, for the record, we love hanging around you.
33:06We love when absolutely we eat.
33:09That's right.
33:10We love when you come to visit and hang out.
33:13We love when you go around to make sure everybody gets a piece of Daddy for the week.
33:18Yeah, when you come.
33:18You know, we like that.
33:20It took a while to do that because I was still doing like my son.
33:24I thought work was one of the most important things in the world.
33:29A little tidbit, a lot of times, working is the other woman.
33:34Wait, wait, who now?
33:35Well, I mean, and then you lie to yourself and say, but I'm making money.
33:41I lied to myself and said, but at least I'm doing this for the main woman.
33:46When I was younger, when the kids were growing up, I never would do any of the little small things.
33:51But then I tried to show up for some of the major things.
33:54And what happened was when I became a non-compensated employee for the federal government,
34:03I asked my kids, well, why didn't you write me?
34:06Why didn't you send cards or whatever?
34:08And Marceau said, I didn't know, we didn't know you.
34:12Oh.
34:15I was related, but there was no relationships.
34:19So I couldn't get mad at him or get upset because he told me the truth.
34:25So it was my opportunity to repair that.
34:29You say like some of the best stuff.
34:32Was there like an age where that like just clicked for you?
34:37Oh, darling.
34:38No, and I'm really serious.
34:39No, no, I'm telling you too, I've up enough.
34:43When you take some time to sit down there and be with yourself, it makes a difference.
34:49This is like really good stuff and good conversation.
34:53Do you have it with them?
34:55When they have time.
34:56When they have time.
34:58Did you have a relationship with your father?
35:00Genesis 1?
35:01It's sounding like a cycle.
35:03Yeah, that I'm breaking.
35:06I used to tell Marceau early on in our marriage that money comes and go.
35:12Time, once it's gone, you don't get it back.
35:14In every generation, you have someone that has to break the cycle in order for it to stop.
35:19So I am so happy to hear Daddy Scott acknowledge the problem and say that, listen, I'm going to stop
35:27this.
35:27I realize I see it and it's a problem and it needs to stop.
35:31So, yeah, kudos to him for realizing that.
35:33I had been living vicariously through my grandsons.
35:38At the graduation, when you had the party for the brothers, I sat back and I thank God for the
35:44opportunity to see all the stuff that was going on.
35:48And it was good just to be right there in the moment.
35:50I think when you're incarcerated, it gives you a lot of thinking, Tom.
35:55And I think Daddy Scott definitely, you know, has some regrets that he's missed with his boys.
36:01And I'm not even sure if Marceau and Maurice, you know, I really kind of wonder if they know how
36:07he feels.
36:08You see the boys in the grandkids?
36:11Yes.
36:11And it's a measure of trying to spend more time with the grandkids?
36:15No, no, it's spending more time with my family.
36:18You're doing a great job, Dad.
36:18You're doing great, Dad, yeah.
36:20I am proud of my family, period.
36:28I know it's hard because I'm trying to keep myself calm.
36:36The tension is always high with her and I because I think I'm the biggest reminder of her pain.
36:42You know, my brother is no longer here, God rest his soul.
36:45And we're the only two kids that she actually had and, you know, raised to a certain point.
36:50And so I feel like I'm just a reminder every time she sees me of that pain and her choices.
36:56I think, I mean, this is full circle, just confirmation to things that I already knew, like, I know she's
37:03not well.
37:04So I thought that maybe she would have something for Paula and, I mean, I know Jesse don't want to
37:10meet her, but I thought she would have something more.
37:12But she talked to her like, I mean...
37:13All I want is the tedious journey.
37:19Long have Jesus.
37:21She's singing now.
37:22She's walking me.
37:24Guide my feet, Lord.
37:26I know you guide my feet.
37:29Listen to my mother sing, it's just like, I know it's a beautiful moment.
37:34It's the same voice that I remember singing to me as a little girl.
37:38And she just has a beautiful voice.
37:40She just still does, even after all of the life, hard life that she's lived.
37:45She still sings for God.
37:46And so that's like, I don't know, it's just beautiful.
37:49I thank you for bringing us together and everything.
37:52You're welcome, little big brother.
37:53I do appreciate it.
37:55Like I told you, you did the family of service, you know, connect our long-lost siblings together and everything.
38:03That's beautiful.
38:04Hi.
38:05Hi.
38:06I'm just joining y'all.
38:08Well, I'm glad you got to meet her.
38:10Yeah, I'm grateful.
38:12I'm like, you're the right to me.
38:13It's not ideal, but...
38:16She's such a bubbly cheerleader.
38:18She's optimistic. I can see. I understand.
38:20Yeah.
38:23It's just different because she has never had to experience her.
38:28We all have had her in and out, in and out, in and out, in and out.
38:32You just meeting her for the first time after you lived a full life is different.
38:37You know, I really want to make sure that my mother and I have like a one-on-one.
38:41And for her to know that no matter what, like, I still love her.
38:45And, you know, her decisions affected me and all our other kids.
38:50But at the end of the day, like, that's still my mother.
38:51I wouldn't be here without her.
38:52And I love her, too.
38:54I'm getting ready to go.
38:55And I just wanted to talk to you by myself for a second.
39:01And I want you to meet your daughter because she said she didn't want to...
39:03I did. I did.
39:04She said she didn't want to do it by herself, so I...
39:07She didn't have to.
39:09We've seen this thing in Gospels.
39:10I know.
39:10I heard y'all.
39:11I brought tears to my eyes.
39:13But I just want you to know that regardless of how we go back and forth and...
39:17We don't go back and forth.
39:18You go back and forth.
39:19Your daddy is crazy.
39:21Can we know?
39:21We're talking to me.
39:22You're talking to me.
39:23Yeah, I'm talking to you.
39:23You're talking to me.
39:24Yeah, I'm talking to you.
39:24I just want to say this to you.
39:26I love you.
39:30I love you.
39:31And I just want you to know that.
39:34You got a funny way of showing it.
39:36I can only show it the way I know how.
39:37Okay.
39:38Have a blessed day.
39:39You too.
39:39You say I'm going back to tenure.
39:41If I live or die, don't worry about me.
39:43That's the way you feel, right?
39:44Yeah, that's just how I feel.
39:45All right.
39:46That's the way it is.
39:50As an adult, I don't hold the pain anymore of my mother letting us be.
39:57Taken away because I went through the process of forgiving her.
40:02Because as a mother now myself, I couldn't imagine not having my baby.
40:09I just couldn't imagine.
40:11So my empathy has allowed me to forgive her.
40:24Next on Love and Marriage Huntsville.
40:27Tisha was like, get Ken out of these girls' DMs or something.
40:33A couple DMs here and there.
40:35Yeah, but if I have done it, I'm not going to lie to you.
40:38It's not that big of a deal to me.
40:42I used to mask my pain and, like, guard myself just like she does.
40:47And what I learned in therapy is that when you mask your pain, you can't feel anything.
40:51Is that why you're so feisty?
40:52Me?
40:53Feisty?
40:53Yes.
40:54Aggressive.
40:55Wrong A.
40:56Assertive.
40:58These last few months, though, I'm tired of it.
41:00Yeah.
41:01I want a reason to go back home.
41:03Man, you want your woman to do right.
41:05Yeah, yeah.
41:05Make you happy, make you want to come home.
41:07Yep.
41:08Tisha tell Trish that supposedly somebody came to her and I was in their DMs.
41:13Tisha just told Trish that?
41:15Yes.
41:16He needs to check his wife and check her on what she's doing because she's really kind
41:20of driving a wedge in our relationship.
41:22Why was that something that came?
41:23Yeah, I'm kind of wondering that, too.
41:25That's a little embarrassing for me.
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