Welcome to Unfiltered Stories. Sarah Lindsey shares her harrowing experience of being placed in foster care with her brother, only to become a victim of his mistreatment. For two months, Sarah endured trauma, and despite telling multiple people, nobody believed her did to her and ignored her cries for help. She was seen and dismissed as a foster child seeking attention until the abuse was finally uncovered. Her brother was sent to juvenile detention, but the scars left on Sarah are a testament to the pain of not being believed when it mattered most. Now, she shares her journey of healing and survival.
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Thank you for watching Unfiltered Stories! We offer a platform for our guests to speak openly about their life stories and journeys, shedding light on the challenges they faced and the resilience they've shown.
Our mission is to raise awareness about survivors by delving into their stories, exploring the impact of their experiences, and how they've managed to heal and rebuild their lives.
By sharing these stories, we aim to break the silence surrounding those challenging memories and create a compassionate environment.
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#survivorstories #survivingtrauma #healingjourney
Thank you for watching Unfiltered Stories! We offer a platform for our guests to speak openly about their life stories and journeys, shedding light on the challenges they faced and the resilience they've shown.
Our mission is to raise awareness about survivors by delving into their stories, exploring the impact of their experiences, and how they've managed to heal and rebuild their lives.
By sharing these stories, we aim to break the silence surrounding those challenging memories and create a compassionate environment.
🌅 FOLLOW US 🌅
Facebook ➮ https://tinyurl.com/UnfilteredFB
Tiktok ➮ https://tinyurl.com/UnfilteredTT
Snapchat ➮ https://tinyurl.com/UnfilteredSN
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NewsTranscript
00:00My name is Sarah. This is a story about how from a very young age I was sexually abused and
00:07how
00:07it affected my life. I was 18 months old when CPS found out that my father was sexually abusing
00:16all six of his children. So we got sent into foster care. Me being only 18 months old,
00:22I was just a tiny little baby. By the time that I was four years old, I had already been
00:27through
00:27seven different foster homes and I still had no clue what happened. My mom at the time,
00:35she was working a lot. She really didn't know what he was doing. But when she was home, he was
00:42very like physically abusive to her. The only child that he did not sexually abuse was me. When they
00:51first put us into foster care, it was really hard because there were six children. So they had to
00:58figure out who they were going to keep together and who they were going to separate. As I got a
01:03little bit older throughout the foster homes, there was one brother who I just would not let go to
01:10another home. I was so attached to him and he was my best friend. As I started to get older,
01:15I could
01:15tell like how certain homes were not places that CPS should have ever clear and able to take in a
01:24kid.
01:24I remember one specific home. I was the youngest and they didn't like the youngest child. So they
01:32would lock me in a very dark closet until the other kids got done eating. And then they would let
01:38me
01:38eat whatever was left. And you know, there's not much left. So I ended up very starved, very terrified
01:46of the dark. But my brother, he always saved me a plate of food. Another reason why I just had
01:51to
01:51have him everywhere with me. But there were some foster homes that were like that. And then there
01:56were other foster homes where they would take us to church and they would buy us clothes and they were
02:02just angels. It was really like rolling a dice when you're in the foster care system. You never
02:08know what kind of house you're going to get placed into. Five years have passed. I was just a little
02:13kid and I wasn't even getting adopted. I was at the age where like a lot of people who when
02:19they go to
02:19adopt, that's the age that they want. And so I was just very confused as to why. Why can't we
02:27go back
02:27to our mom? Why can't we get adopted by a good family? Why do we have to be in these
02:31foster homes?
02:32The system at the time, which this was back in like 2009, was not as, I guess, developed as you
02:42would say it is now. Which, it was completely overloaded with kids. They were trying their best
02:49and it was just too difficult to find all of us a home. And so by the point that I
02:55actually did end up
02:57getting adopted, they had told my adoptive parents that if they didn't take us, we would end up in a
03:05group home. Because they just couldn't put us in foster care anymore. There were too many kids.
03:10So I was three years old and I walked into the living room and me and my foster dad, we
03:16really
03:16liked to watch WWE. And my foster mom went out to buy a pack of cigarettes. My foster dad went
03:24to
03:24go fix himself a sandwich in the kitchen. He was not thinking about the fact that there were
03:29all over the coffee table from where he was watching the TV. I'm three years old. I'm curious
03:35as to what's in these bottles. You know, I've drunk root beer that looked like these bottles. I got down
03:40and I started drinking it and he was taking forever. He ended up going to the bathroom and so I
03:47kept
03:47drinking more. Ultimately, they ended up walking back in and seeing that I was throwing up. I was just
03:54completely sick. They realized I must have gotten into the that were on the table. So they drove me to
04:01the hospital and their CPS met us and they realized that we should not be in that home. They were
04:09not
04:09watching us close enough and they were leaving things down that shouldn't be left down. So they
04:15ended up taking us from there. I very likely almost died in that instance just because he left down in
04:23front of a three-year-old. This next house, the parents were fighting a lot. They really loved us,
04:29but they did not like each other. So they were fighting a lot and every time that they fought,
04:34me and my brother would play Handyland. I was four years old at this point. One night I was really
04:41thirsty. So I got up to go get a glass of water and the brother that abused me, he walked
04:47in and
04:49he asked me if I needed help. I said, yes. He helped me get the glass of water and I
04:55had to use the bathroom.
04:56So I went to the restroom and he walked in there and that was when it all started. He started
05:04to sexually abuse me then. And then every night after that, I ended up going to daycare where they
05:10taught us like, I think it's the No No Square song. So I realized what he was doing was wrong.
05:18One night
05:18he came in and he tried to do what he was doing and I screamed and I pushed him away
05:26and I did what
05:28they taught me in school, which immediately our foster parents ran in there. They actually ended
05:34up having to bust the door down. So they busted the door down and they called the police. He ended
05:41up
05:41going to juvie. As a four year old, it really scarred me, left me with a lot of trauma that
05:47my own
05:47brother would have done such a thing to me. But what hurt the worst is that for months I was
05:54telling these
05:55adults, my teachers, everyone, Hey, this is happening to me at home. My brother's doing this.
06:01And they never believed me. They thought that because I was in foster care and I was a four
06:06year old, that I was just crying out for attention. They never believed me until the night that they
06:12found him. I went to school and we had like an assignment. It was like you would color on a
06:17piece
06:17of paper and you would like draw a little picture. So I drew a picture of like the happy forever
06:23home that I
06:24wanted. And then I flipped it over. And on the back, I wrote, my brother is hurting me. She pulled
06:31me
06:31aside after class and she asked me exactly what he was doing. And so I told her what he was
06:37doing.
06:37She was like, okay, I'll look into it. And then a few weeks passed by and I asked her what
06:42happened.
06:43She said, well, I figured out that you were in a foster home. Are you just wanting attention? And I
06:48said,
06:49no, this is actually happening. She just kind of looked at me with like this like pity look on her
06:56face. And she was like, I think this is your imagination. It was then when my trust for these
07:02adults really broke. And I kind of gave up on telling people. I was just really hoping that someone
07:08would catch him in the act because that was undisputable. I told my foster parents twice and
07:14both times they went and they asked my brother. And because he was older, they believed him when
07:21he said that he wouldn't do something like that. And they looked at me and they were like, your
07:25brother wouldn't do something like that. He's been through that. Why would he do it? Now that I'm older,
07:30I think to myself, you know, that's exactly why he did it. As he was like pulling my underwear down
07:35and stuff, I was, I started to scream because that's what they taught me to do in school. My, my
07:41foster
07:41dad, he kind of just like busted the door down. They ended up grabbing him and pulling him out of
07:47the
07:47room. And my foster mom came over there and she was looking me over and she was asking me, has
07:53this
07:53really been going on as long as you've said it has? She was telling me, I'm so sorry. Like I
07:58should
07:58have listened, you know? So they took me to the hospital where they found out that that had been
08:04ongoing for about a year and that I had some severe issues from that. We ended up going to trial
08:11for it. And because I was only four, I was not allowed to like testify, but they did use my
08:17pictures
08:18from the hospital in the court. So he was immediately convicted guilty and he was sent off to juvie where
08:26he stayed there until he turned 18. And then I believe he spent two years in real prison and then
08:32he got
08:32out. I was five when I got placed into the home where they adopted me. I knew immediately that I
08:38wanted them to adopt me because then the second that I saw them, my dad, he is six foot six.
08:46He scared
08:47the whole living crap out of me because of how tall he was. We ended up going to their house
08:53and they
08:54asked us what we wanted to eat. Me and my brother, they asked us what we wanted to eat. We
08:59had never been
09:00asked what we wanted to eat before. We were just told to sit and eat. They asked us what we
09:05wanted
09:05to eat and we got what we wanted to eat. They didn't even have what I wanted to eat, but
09:10they went to
09:11the store and got it. About a year passes by and they hand us these two presents. So me and
09:18my brother,
09:19we opened the presents and it's two Bibles with our first names engraved on it and are now adopted last
09:27names engraved on it. And they said, you don't have to accept, but if you want to, we would really
09:33love
09:33to have you as our children. And me and my brother immediately said yes. There was no doubt in our
09:40minds these were the best people that we had ever been with. It was still terrifying because, you know,
09:45for like the first six months, I believe the social worker has to come and check and make sure that
09:51we're
09:51doing okay. And every time that the social worker would come for a little while, I believed that she
09:56was going to take me away and it scared me. So I hated when she would come to visit, but
10:01eventually
10:02I understood that I was staying there. I think it was actually when they let me paint my room lime
10:07green.
10:07I was really obsessed with Tinkerbell and so they painted my room lime green. I just started crying
10:13because I was so happy that I finally had that forever home. They ended up taking us to Disney.
10:20Everything was great for a long time until I started having these nightmares and I couldn't sleep
10:27because I kept remembering what my abusive brother had done to me. I had been told all my life that
10:35I
10:35was a victim and that victim mentality had really changed the way that I saw myself. So I had to
10:41start
10:42telling myself, you're not a victim, you're a survivor. And which I think is really important for anyone who's
10:48been through abuse to say, like, you survived this, you're strong enough. I did end up in a mental
10:54hospital when I was 12 because I just couldn't get over, like, I felt like I was worthless because of
11:01what had happened to me. I felt like I was unloved, even though I knew that I had a loving
11:06family now.
11:07So ever since then, I have been in therapy. But the greatest thing that helped me was to know that
11:13I'm a survivor, not a victim. I would have these nightmares. I would always be afraid that something
11:23would happen to me again. I lived in a constant state of fear and panic and anxiety. I even had
11:29my parents install blink cameras and window sensors and door sensors just to be sure that I would be
11:36safe. It created serious trust issues because I don't know who I can trust. I couldn't even trust
11:43my own brother. I ended up developing some mental health issues where I became suicidal because I
11:49felt like I was worthless. Like, my parents didn't want me. None of my family wanted me. I was abused
11:56for most of my childhood. The child psychologist, they'll tell you, like, the first five years of
12:02when a child is growing, that is the most crucial time for you to play with them and words of
12:09affirmation
12:10and being kind. I didn't really have that. I grew up around a lot of things that I wasn't supposed
12:16to,
12:17and like any other kid, that causes issues. So when I did end up going to the mental hospital,
12:24I had gotten really bad suicidal one day. I'd actually had a really good day that morning,
12:29and then I just started just feeling really bad about myself. I took three bottles of pills,
12:35pills, but they gave me several coping skills to learn, like, not everyone is trustworthy,
12:41but that doesn't mean that you can't trust people. The biggest thing that helped me also was to talk
12:49to other people who were hurting or people who had been through them. They knew what it was like,
12:54and they were able to give words of advice and to just steer me in the right direction. I was
13:02only
13:02there for a couple of weeks. I ended up doing a lot better after that, and then once I got
13:08out,
13:09I got with a therapist that actually has been really good for me, but I did find out shortly after
13:16I got
13:17out. I was 13 at this point. I found out that my brother was out of juvie, and that really
13:23scared me,
13:24but what scared me more than that was finding out that my father was out of jail because I was
13:29the only
13:30child that he was never able to harm or harass. And I had this feeling as a 13-year-old,
13:38like,
13:38he didn't get to finish the job. What if he comes back? And living in a constant state of fear
13:44isn't
13:45living. I am someone who just really tries to see the best in people because to me, I feel like
13:53if I
13:54only saw the worst in people, then would it be because of what happened to me that that's all
14:00that I look for. It's very important to me to know that what happened to me can make me stronger
14:06as a
14:06person, that I can use it also to see other people who are hurting and to reach out to them
14:13and help
14:14them. I'm 18 years old. I start college on Monday, which is super exciting. I have a job. I still
14:21go to
14:21therapy. I've actually gotten back in contact with one of my sisters, and things are going great
14:27between us. A lot of things are starting to pan out the way that I think they're supposed to. If
14:33I
14:33had any advice to give, it would be just don't give up. Every morning, I would wake up. Every night,
14:40I would go to bed. I would look myself in the mirror, and I would tell myself, I am strong.
14:46I survived
14:47this, and I can get through the healing process.
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