00:02Il nostro team è l'elite dell'elite
00:07We're the heart and soul of this very beach
00:10We protect when other people don't want to protect
00:13And we go above and beyond
00:16Help me! Help!
00:20If you want me, you can have me
00:22Some other time
00:27We're staring into the abyss here
00:29City Council's already cut our funding
00:31It's up to us to restore the Baywatch brand
00:35I'm Matt Brody, ready for duty
00:37Do you just look at my boobs?
00:39You should look at my face
00:40I'm trying, but it's so close to your boobs
00:44This is the guy you think is a good PR opportunity for us
00:48Do some shots!
00:50He's reckless
00:54With two gold medals
00:57How many gold medals do you have?
00:59Probably zero
01:01We got a dead body on our beach
01:04That's not our job
01:05My gut says there's some bad shit going on over there
01:07And my balls say we need to check it out
01:09My balls say
01:09It's just diggity's right here
01:11Why the fuck do your balls sound like three-year-old girls?
01:13I don't know, man
01:14That's just how they talk
01:15But they're wise
01:18Welcome to Baywatch
01:24Why are you grabbing me so tight?
01:26Why does she always look like she's running in slow-mo?
01:30You see it too?
01:38You turned the canals into the goddamn X-Gangs
01:41Yeah, that's because we were in lifeguard pursuit
01:43There's no fucking such thing as lifeguard pursuit
01:46How do I explain this so that you people understand?
01:49You people?
01:51You people?
01:52Oh, you don't get to say that
01:53You're just tan
01:54Right on
01:55Come on, brother
01:56What the fuck?
01:57What the fuck?
01:59What the fuck?
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