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00:10Here are Bob and Ray with some of the latest inventions perfected by the Bob and Ray Laboratories.
00:16And have we ever been busy over there with some new inventions, friends?
00:20We certainly do, and we have a few to show to you tonight, inventions that our assistants have worked on.
00:25For gourmets, they have come up with this, a pepper shaker with no holes in the top.
00:30This, of course, for people who don't like pepper.
00:33Well, I think that's going to be very catchy.
00:35Also, big news, we think, is our Bob and Ray square bathtub, so you won't leave a ring in it.
00:44Our inventors over there at the laboratories have come up with something we can all carry in our pocket or
00:49purse.
00:49This is a new garlic mint to get rid of that chlorophyll taste.
00:55And also, this is one we're really proud of.
00:57I think this is the greatest invention we've ever come up with.
01:00This is for the home gardener.
01:01It's a special lawn sprinkler with every other hole plugged up with matches.
01:07Now, the water that comes out, you see, waters the grass.
01:10And the water that doesn't come out doesn't water the weeds, and they die.
01:17Finally, I'm holding in my hand a flashlight, not the ordinary kind.
01:21This flashlight is a new development because it throws a black beam for finding things in the daytime.
01:29And here is a wonderful brand-new invention of ours.
01:33This is a steamboat whistle, you see, which is used to start the names the same.
01:56The Ralston Purina Company, a famous old checkerboard square in St. Louis, Missouri.
02:01Ralston, makers of Wheat Checks, Rice Checks, Rye Crisp, and Instant Ralston present The Names the Same.
02:14And now the co-moderators of The Names the Same, the original checkerboard squares, Bob and Ray.
02:20Thank you, Lee, and hello, everybody.
02:24Good evening.
02:26Before we start the game tonight, I think we should introduce our very distinguished panel.
02:32A good idea.
02:32First of all, you know, all the time they keep introducing Joan Alexander as the star of so many soap
02:37operas.
02:38I'm going to introduce her as former Lois Lane of Superman.
02:42Hey, how about that?
02:48And to Joan's right, we have the gentleman who handles the weighty questions on the program, Walter Slazak.
02:56Thank you very much.
02:59And next, of course, our very dear friend, Audrey Meadows, the star of the Art Kearney Show.
03:22Thank you very much.
03:36How are you?
03:36How are you?
03:37I'm Bob.
03:37Now, of course, you don't want to tell us your name, sir.
03:40Where are you from?
03:42I'm from Woodland, Pennsylvania.
03:43Woodland, Pennsylvania.
03:45Whereabouts in Pennsylvania is Woodland?
03:47It's located three miles outside Chester and about ten miles from Philadelphia.
03:53Wow.
03:54Is that close to Kavanaugh's Drugstore in Reading?
03:56No.
03:58Why do you make that left turn if you go anywhere?
04:00Oh, well.
04:00You know where that firehouse is.
04:02You make a left turn down there, don't you?
04:04Oh, we don't want to kid around too much.
04:06We want to see if the panel can find out this gentleman's famous name.
04:10Now, before we let the panel start, let's show our home audience.
04:23Okay, panel, we'll start this off with you, Audrey.
04:28Well, judging from the applause, I take it our guest is very famous.
04:31Are you living, sir?
04:32Yes.
04:33You are.
04:33Speak right at the microphone.
04:35Yes.
04:35And your name, I take it, is a male name.
04:38It's not a trick name.
04:39It's male.
04:40It's male.
04:41Are you American?
04:43Yes.
04:44You are.
04:45Well, I'll pass to you, Walter.
04:46Are you in the arts?
04:48No.
04:51Uh...
04:51Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
04:53You're in the arts.
04:54Yeah.
04:55Are you a well-known performer?
04:58Yes.
04:59On television?
05:01Uh, he's been on television, sure.
05:04Sometimes.
05:05Are you more known for your stage work?
05:07Yes.
05:09Are you a juvenile?
05:10Uh, well, now, I wouldn't think so.
05:14No, I...
05:15Are you a romantic type of man?
05:18Oh, I see.
05:19Oh, I...
05:20Why are you crazy?
05:23Uh, well, he could play a romantic part, I suppose,
05:26but you'd have to really stretch your imagination.
05:30Wait a minute.
05:31Are you fat?
05:33Oh, yes.
05:34Yes.
05:35Are you a comedian?
05:37Oh, are you kidding?
05:39You're not a comedian.
05:40A little bit.
05:42I pass.
05:44Well, Walter, I thought you had it for a minute.
05:46I don't know.
05:47Are you currently playing in a Broadway production?
05:49Yes.
05:50Are you also appearing on a panel show?
05:52Yes.
05:54Uh...
05:54Say it, say it.
05:55I think Walter Slezak is very romantic.
06:03Thank you, Walter Slezak.
06:05Walter, meet, uh...
06:06The other Walter Slezak, and I think...
06:08I want you to know that I'm a comedian in fanny.
06:11All right.
06:12All right.
06:23Well, now, uh, Walter, uh, the other Mr. Slezak is going to meet, uh, the guests that we have in
06:29our studio.
06:30We have the entire, uh, Slezak family.
06:33Mrs. Slezak and the three kiddos out there.
06:37Would you stand up and let everyone see you?
06:39There's Leo, Erica.
06:41May I introduce them?
06:47On the right, on the right, there is my firstborn, Ingrid.
06:52She wants to become a doctor.
06:53Uh-huh.
06:54And she already hates the socialized medicine.
06:57On the second, there's Erica.
07:00She, uh, writes poetry, and a couple of teeth are missing, but they will grow back.
07:05The next to her is my youngest unmarried son.
07:08His name is Leo.
07:10He's called 95% Leo after my, my father, the famous Leo Slezak, and 5% after Leo McCary.
07:17And to the left is my one and only, my first and last wife.
07:20That's a wonderful thing.
07:27Walter, I, uh, I don't want to embarrass you.
07:30I suppose you've had the, uh, the usual run of little, uh, problems with the kids.
07:34We all have those.
07:35We have a gentleman, uh, with us on our Bob and Ray staff who is an expert at child psychology
07:41and handling the many problems that have been sent to us.
07:44And he's here tonight.
07:45I'd like to introduce him now, Dr. Milton Herman.
07:53Doctor, it's a real great place to have you here.
07:56We've had a lot of letters with questions from, uh, parents, and they wonder whether
08:00you would give the answers to them.
08:02So shall we get right to these?
08:03Yes, if you would, Bob.
08:04All right, here's, here's the first one from a Mrs. LT of Emporia, Kansas.
08:09And she says, uh, her 11-year-old son watches television every evening while eating his dinner
08:15and sometimes takes as much as two and a half or three hours to complete his meal.
08:20Can you advise her what to do?
08:21She wonders if she should turn the set off completely or find some happy medium.
08:26Oh, no, indeed, I wouldn't do that.
08:28I would advise this harassed mother to talk to the child.
08:33I find that if you could speak without raising your voice, using a conversational tone,
08:39and, uh, explain to the child that while television is nourishing his brain, that he must nourish
08:47his body by eating his meals.
08:49I think if, if she explained this in, in a low voice, that he'd understand.
08:54However, if he persists, after you explain this to him, if he persists in taking two hours
09:01to eat his meal and watch television, then I'd advise her to cloud him.
09:10Here's our, uh, second one, doctor.
09:12A rather unusual letter we had from Mr. J.W. of Elgin, Illinois.
09:16He says that his son, aged eight, has become infatuated with Marilyn Monroe.
09:20In fact, to the point where, in the past few months, he has decided that he's going to
09:24marry Marilyn Monroe.
09:25Now, what can we do about that?
09:27Well, uh, here, of course, this has humorous overtones.
09:29Now, this little fellow, he's what?
09:31Uh, eight.
09:31Eight years old, wanting to marry Marilyn Monroe.
09:35Uh, here again, I would say, uh, explain to the boy that the vast differences in age would
09:41make marrying at this time impossible.
09:44Uh-huh.
09:45Uh, explain in a low conversational tone.
09:48Uh, tell him that, uh, when he grows up and is of marrying age, that he probably, uh, would
09:53be interested in another, uh, girl at that time.
09:56Then, if he still persists, cloud him.
10:00Finally, uh, one of our young viewers, and I hope he's watching today, little TH of Armark,
10:06New York, has a problem involving his younger brother.
10:09He says his brother gets up before everybody in the house every day and does all of the chores,
10:15cleans the house, washes the car.
10:16He's an honor student in school.
10:18He's a very good athlete, practices the violin three hours a day,
10:21and takes four baths a day.
10:25And, uh, little TH says, what could I do to compete with my brother?
10:30Marry Marilyn Monroe.
10:32Thank you very much.
10:33I think you've answered all of the questions, Doctor.
10:35It's been a pleasure to see you.
10:39Now, may we have our next guest, please, to play Names of Saints.
10:46All right, sit right down here, will you?
10:48Uh, don't tell us your name, but we would like to know where you're from, man.
10:52Chicago, of course.
10:53And what do you do in Chicago?
10:55Why, of course.
10:57What do you do out there?
10:58I'm a housewife.
10:59Okay, well, we're going to send, uh, $10 to Mrs. T.R. Radborn of New Westminster,
11:05British Columbia for submitting your name.
11:07That's all the information we can give you, panel.
11:10And let's show our home audience what this lady's name is right now.
11:19All right, kiddo.
11:21And we'll tell you that her name is the same as a thing.
11:24And let's start off with Roger Price.
11:27Uh, is this thing something useful?
11:31Yes, I think so.
11:32Is it likely I have one there?
11:35Uh, I don't.
11:37Would, uh,
11:37You might have had one at one time or another, if it was one reason or another.
11:41Well, you said, uh, have one there.
11:43Have one where?
11:44Uh, I don't know.
11:45I think we should have a meeting at the summit about this, do you think?
11:48All right.
11:49Uh, well, just there.
11:50Yeah, I was there.
11:51I'll pass the question.
11:52Uh, is this, uh, something that Audrey might be more likely to have than me?
11:57Uh, no, I don't think so.
11:59Not particularly, no.
12:00Huh?
12:00Is this something that's manufactured?
12:02No.
12:04Uh, is this something, say, uh, sort of, uh, useful in this way?
12:08Like, uh, uh, well, do it this way.
12:12Down upside down.
12:13This is a bow tie for a violin player.
12:17I didn't see that anywhere.
12:18In there, I couldn't think of any questions.
12:20Is it something like that?
12:20Something peculiar?
12:21Uh, no.
12:22No, it's not peculiar, really.
12:23I passed, Audrey.
12:25Uh, is this something, uh, that would fit into my pocketbook?
12:30Yes, I think it would.
12:32Mm-hmm.
12:32Is it something that I would be out to carry with me in my pocketbook?
12:37You might.
12:38Not likely to, though.
12:39It's not likely.
12:41Would I use it around the house?
12:45In the house?
12:46Yes.
12:47In the house.
12:48Uh, would I, uh,
12:51would this come in contact with my body in any way?
12:53Would I, uh, apply this to myself?
12:56Yeah, uh, apply it?
12:58Yes.
12:59I don't think so.
13:00I wouldn't say you would.
13:02No.
13:02Is this thing alive?
13:04No.
13:05But it's not manufactured?
13:07No.
13:07It's in its natural state?
13:09Yes, it is.
13:11Uh, do you hit people with this thing?
13:14You could.
13:15Good.
13:16Good.
13:16I could.
13:16You could?
13:17Sure.
13:18Yeah.
13:19But that isn't its, uh, prime use.
13:20Two left, Audrey.
13:21Two left?
13:22I pass.
13:23Uh, is this part of the human body?
13:27No.
13:28It is not.
13:29It is not.
13:30Is it, uh, some part of an, oh, it's not alive.
13:32I pass.
13:33Is it, uh, is it edible, this thing?
13:35No.
13:36It is not edible.
13:38Uh, uh, this, this thing.
13:41There's some staring in the audience.
13:42I think it is edible.
13:43I, uh, I, I know why they're staring, but I don't think this thing actually is edible.
13:48It is not actually edible?
13:49No.
13:50Is it, uh, was it ever living?
13:53Uh, no.
13:55It is not something that grows.
13:57Is it something that grows?
13:59It is.
14:00And it was living.
14:01Is it some sort of vegetable life?
14:03No.
14:04Is it some sort of plant life?
14:06It's, it's some kind of vegetable life.
14:08It is some sort of vegetable life?
14:09But I think our time is up.
14:11And will you tell them what your name is?
14:13I'd love to.
14:14Olive Pitt.
14:15We can have a lot of.
14:16Olive Pitt.
14:22Well, I was told that the, uh, they are, they are edible when they, when they ground up royal after.
14:27Yeah, they can be mashed down.
14:28Sure.
14:28Thank you very much.
14:29And, uh, playing names the same.
14:31I'm going to be next.
14:42Well, right now, we'd like to have you meet our special guest.
14:47I'm getting all ready for them.
14:48I should more correctly say guest.
14:50That's right.
14:50There are two.
14:51We have the, uh, very great comedian from television and nightclubs, and his new partner on the airways,
14:57the ex-middleweight boxing champ of the world turned comedian, Rocky Graziano and Henny Youngman.
15:11How are you?
15:12Just fine.
15:13That is nice to see you here.
15:15All right.
15:15You just sit down here now.
15:16We can, uh, get to our game.
15:18I understand that you're going to start, uh, your, uh, new show here on, uh, ABC this week.
15:25Is that right?
15:25That's right.
15:25Wednesday night after the fights.
15:27Right after the fights.
15:28What, uh, what kind of a show is it going to be, Rocky?
15:30Well, after the fights, we're going to talk about the fights, you know, uh,
15:33uh, uh, uh, uh, sort of an ad-lib show, you know.
15:36Yeah, ad-lib, yeah.
15:38You're going to make it up, you mean, as you go along?
15:40I like the way Joe's like an actor now.
15:43Well, I, you, you know all of the, uh, members of our panel.
15:46Yes, I had a pleasure.
15:48And Rodgers, so on.
15:49Very good.
15:49I'll take the favor of that.
15:52Let's, uh, let's play our game.
15:53All right.
15:54Uh, now, boys, I tell you, we'll get right at it.
15:57Uh, before the show panel, as always, with our guests tonight, uh, Henny Youngman and Rocky Graziano,
16:02told Bob and me their special wish.
16:04First of all, though, let's show our home audience what this wish is.
16:18Okay, panel, now we'll start this go-round with you, Audrey.
16:21And this is a wish, is that it?
16:23That's right.
16:24Uh, are you going to do this thing together?
16:28No.
16:30Is it something, uh, well, one of you wants to do it, is that it?
16:33That's right.
16:34Is it something Rocky's going to do?
16:37Well, there's an association somewhere.
16:39Mm-hmm.
16:40Oh, well, if you're not both going to do it together, are you doing it separately?
16:43That's right.
16:45And you're going to do this, Henny?
16:48Well, I'd like to do it.
16:50You'd like, there's something you'd like to do?
16:51Yes, that's the wish.
16:52Will this, uh, improve you, um, financially?
16:57Yes.
16:59Will it improve your stature in the business?
17:02Will it add to your fame in any way?
17:04Oh, yeah.
17:04Sure will, Henny, sure.
17:06I think so.
17:07If it makes me more money, it will.
17:09Will it improve your mind in any way?
17:12Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
17:17Will it, uh, make him, uh, more attractive to the opposite sex?
17:20Sure.
17:24Audrey, I think you've had all your questions.
17:26Oh, and I lost that.
17:28That's right.
17:29Um, has this wish something to do with your new show?
17:32Well, it could have.
17:34Are you hoping for a good rating?
17:36No, that will get with Rocky on it.
17:38He's got a following.
17:40Is it something to do with your, uh, improving your appearance?
17:44No.
17:45You want your noses barbed?
17:48My nose?
17:49I got a nose like a ramp garage.
17:52I passed.
17:54Does it have anything to do with each other?
17:55I mean, would you like to be each other or anything like that?
17:58No, there's an association there.
18:01I might be.
18:01There is an association?
18:02No, I'm getting one.
18:02Would you like to be a fighter?
18:04Henny?
18:05I've had my battles at home.
18:07You have?
18:09Uh, would you like to do something that Rocky does do?
18:12Yes.
18:13You would like to do something he does better than you do it.
18:16Is that right?
18:17Well, I don't know whether it's going to be better or not, but I think it's all right.
18:21And Rocky would like to do something that you do?
18:23Rocky has nothing to do with this at all.
18:25Oh, he hasn't.
18:25It's something that you would like to do that Rocky now does.
18:29Is that right?
18:30Right, right.
18:30Well, Rocky is on the Martha Ray Show, and Rocky's a great boxer, and Rocky's adorable, and I don't know
18:38what else he's saying.
18:42He has a beautiful wife and two beautiful children that I saw on the Murrow Show.
18:46Well, what else does Rocky do?
18:48Oh, I have that too.
18:48I mean, it's something that...
18:50Well, I'm afraid it does.
18:51Maybe Roger will know.
18:52Would you like to play chess like Rocky does?
18:56Anything to do with show business?
18:59Well, not particularly.
19:01It's nothing like you don't want to do a rock and roll version of the Indian love call.
19:04I tell you, Roger, really way off the track here.
19:08Uh, Henny, why don't you tell them exactly what it is?
19:10I'd like to talk like Rocky does, because he's making a lot of money. He can't even understand him at
19:14the time.
19:23Why actually do you wish, uh...
19:24Well, Rocky talks, and he gets laughs. He don't have to have jokes.
19:27Well, I think if you could talk the way he does, that they have no problem with the program.
19:32That's right. It might help somewhere along the line, because he's doing very well.
19:35And I'm very happy about it, because I'll have someone to borrow from.
19:38Well, how about it, Arnie? Did we let Rocky give Henny an elocution lesson right here?
19:42Try that out right here.
19:49Well, you know, first you have to, uh, you know, uh, go, go, go.
19:54Well, what do you want me to do?
19:58You're doing it wrong, see?
19:59What do you mean?
20:00No, no, breathe, breathe, like a...
20:02No, no, you gotta breathe like a...
20:06Breathe like a pilot?
20:07Yeah, yeah.
20:08How can you talk that way?
20:10Tell a joke.
20:12All right. A fellow walked up to me, a panhandle walked up to me.
20:14We were standing in front of a store, and...
20:16No, it's too good. We all understand you, don't you?
20:21All right. A fellow is walking up to a panhandle...
20:24No, Arnie, it's too good.
20:25All right.
20:25You gotta talk like, you know...
20:27Like you?
20:28Yeah.
20:28All right.
20:30He says, why do you want me to do that?
20:31He says, why do you want me to do that?
20:33He said, open up an office.
20:34That's good.
20:40What did I say?
20:41Go ahead, Arnie.
20:42He said a panhandle walked over, two hats he had in his hand.
20:45That's right.
20:45And you said, what is he doing with the air hat?
20:49Yeah.
20:49The guy says, well, I'm going to open a...
20:51Things are so good.
20:52Things are so good, I'm going to open a branch office.
20:54Very good.
20:54Oh, is that high?
20:59Very good, very good.
21:01All right.
21:01You want to do another one?
21:02I think you want.
21:03All right.
21:05My wife came home with a new kind of a hat.
21:08What kind?
21:09She came home with a new kind of a hat.
21:10No material, just the price tag on a rear.
21:16Like a butt.
21:18Rocky, I think the diction lesson is very good you gave me.
21:20And we're going to construct oil here.
21:46George, it's just about time we have some accounting.
21:48All right, Fred.
21:49Why don't we see how the panel made out?
21:51They've been figuring very busily over there.
21:54Let's start with you, Joan.
21:55How did you do today?
21:56I lost $40, Bob.
21:58How did you ever know about Superman?
21:59It was so long ago.
22:01But it was such fun to do.
22:03I bet it was.
22:05I lost $60, and goodbye, everybody.
22:07And, Walter, congratulations for having such a wonderful family.
22:11I liked them very much.
22:13How did you do?
22:15I lost $60, and I hope you'll watch the Art Connie show this Saturday.
22:20And how about you, Roger Price?
22:22I lost $60 because we had Walter Slezak's namesake on.
22:25I drew a Google about Walter.
22:26This is called Walter Slezak smoking a pipe in a soft bed.
22:30He did right.
22:32He did right.
22:33He did right.
22:35Incidentally, right here, we've been asked to make an announcement and would like to have
22:40your attention.
22:41And I haven't had a chance to...
22:42It was handed to us just before we went on the air, so we haven't had time to read
22:45this thing over or anything.
22:47It says, will the person or thing who made the...
22:52Let me see if I can make this out.
22:53The three left footprints in the wet cement in front of the museum, please contact the
23:00curator of the...
23:01What is that?
23:03The Natural History Museum.
23:04Yeah.
23:05So, fella or thing, if you're listening, you, whoever made the three left footprints in
23:10the wet cement outside there, contact the curator.
23:12He wants to see you.
23:14And next time, we greet you.
23:16We've got some big news of a Bob and Ray event that is to take place in the next few
23:20weeks, an event that should be of interest to some of the members of your family anyway.
23:24Well, what's that to speak of?
23:27It's a big track meet, but we can't say too much about it tonight.
23:30Oh no, that'll be coming along at a later date.
23:33But that would appear to be it for now, friends.
23:35Just a reminder before we say so long that if you do get work, would you please write to us?
23:41And until next time, this is Bob Elliott.
23:43Ray Golding saying so long and thanks for playing the names the same.
24:03The name's the same, it's been a Mark Goodson, Bill Tottenham production, executive producer
24:09Peter Arnell, Miss Alexander's and Miss Meadows gowns by Sorrell.
24:26Be sure to tune in each one every week for the names the same, brought to you by the
24:30Ralston's Arena Company, St. Louis, makers of Rice Checks, Wheat Checks, Instant Rolls.
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