- 19 hours ago
Category
🛠️
LifestyleTranscript
00:00I'll give it all away, just don't tell nobody tomorrow
00:05So tonight, I'll do it every way
00:11Not until the morning light
00:15We like to party
00:16We like to party
00:27We like to party
00:49We like to party
00:54Yeah.
01:24What do you consider fun?
01:49Fun, natural fun.
01:54Fun, natural fun.
02:24Time isn't present in that dimension.
02:29You take my heart.
02:34When I'm walking, rolling and rocking.
02:39It's fun time, I'm glad I'm not a man.
02:43Feels like I'm dreaming, but I'm not sleeping.
02:46When I'm in heaven, with the maven of my mutation.
03:15I'm playing dance musicians such as Bootsy Collins.
03:21Raise expectations to a new retention.
03:25No one can sing.
03:30Quiet, quiet, smoky, smoky Robinson.
03:35Waiting and skanking to Pat Morley.
03:38Right by six, standing with Sly and Robbie.
03:43You need to get up to my mazella, up to my mazella, up to my mazella, up to my mazella, up to my mazella.
03:48That's where he, where he won't be.
03:52Location!
03:53Yes!
03:55Yes!
04:00I like this one right here.
04:04This one's all my ladies, y'all.
04:06I don't want your man.
04:12Cause I got it like that, but it ain't even gotta be like that
04:16Essence Fest, make some noise
04:19I can't hear y'all, make some noise this morning, Essence Fest
04:25Was that panel amazing or what?
04:27I mean, to be honest, there's no better way to start this thing off
04:32By, you know, than talking about our well-being, right?
04:35Okay, so I have something great for you guys coming up next
04:43Now, if you're just making your way to the Essence stage or tuning in at home
04:48We are just getting warmed up
04:50So grab yourself a comfy seat
04:52Because this next panel is all about two things that I'm having a real, real hard time obtaining
05:00Love and relationships
05:03Make some noise if you're single in here
05:07Okay, make some noise if you're in love
05:10Alright, okay
05:12So, if you're picking up what I just put down, y'all
05:16Things are about to get real
05:18Go ahead and snap some photos, write down some gems
05:21Without further ado, please give a warm welcome
05:25To Essence Entertainment editor, Revee Ruff
05:28Darling of Love is Blind, season one
05:31Lauren Speed Hamilton
05:33And half of the dynamic duo that we all fell in love with
05:38Unmarried at First Sight
05:39Miss Brianna Miles
05:41Hi
05:41I like the music
05:59Hey Essence fam
06:03Hey y'all
06:04Hi
06:04Good morning
06:05Good morning
06:06I'm so honored to be here today to dive into this next conversation about black love and black relationships
06:11I'm your moderator, Revee Ruff
06:13And today I'm in a conversation with two lovely ladies
06:16Who have inspired so many women with their love stories
06:19And their adventurous way about finding the one for them
06:22We have Rihanna Miles and Lauren Speed Hamilton
06:25Just to dive right in
06:28Ladies, can you talk to us about what led you to make the decision to look for love and romance in the way that you did?
06:35Was it a no-brainer?
06:37Or were you like in the rope?
06:38Or, Lauren, let's start with you
06:40Well, girl
06:41Let me just roll out the scroll
06:44No, my dating life was really going nowhere
06:47I was at a frustrated point
06:48And all my dates were just empty
06:51They were super surface
06:52So, when the opportunity to go on Love is Blind came to me
06:58Because that's an important key, y'all
06:59Came to me
06:59I didn't have to go chasing it
07:01You know, that's what God will do sometimes
07:03It'll bring the blessing to you when you least expect it
07:05Amen
07:06And I never thought I was going to do reality TV
07:09At first, I thought it was such a crazy concept
07:11But then the more I prayed about it
07:13I was like, you know what?
07:15My dates have been super surfaced
07:16This is a good way to connect with someone that I can't see
07:19Not based off just physical
07:20And really make a human connection with someone
07:23So, that really was like, okay
07:25This could really be for me
07:27And thank God I did it
07:28Because five years later, me and my husband came
07:32Still together, blessed
07:33And Rihanna, what about you?
07:35How did you pursue this choice?
07:38So, for me, I had just moved to Atlanta in December 2019
07:43And the world shut down because of COVID in March 2020
07:48And so, I had been going on dates
07:50And like she said, they were very surface level
07:52It was really nothing to them
07:55And I was actually going out on dates quite a bit
07:57I was like, okay, I'm very picky
07:59Very picky
08:01So, when the opportunity, you know, presented itself
08:04I was like, okay, maybe this would, you know, be good for me
08:07I had all my stuff together
08:10I had finished college
08:12I was in my career
08:13I was like, okay, now all I'm missing is my man
08:16You know?
08:17And so, yeah, the opportunity presented itself
08:20And I said, okay, let's do it
08:22Did not think I would ever be chosen to do this
08:26But I said, let's go along with the process
08:28And here we are
08:29Almost three years later with a baby
08:32Worked out well
08:34Now, some people assume when you go on these reality shows
08:39That everything is staged, scripted, fake
08:41They tell you what to do, what to say
08:43Was any of that true for either of you on your shows?
08:46Do you feel like how you were depicted on TV
08:48Is kind of true to form to how you actually are?
08:52Brianna?
08:53For me, I will say that it was mainly all true
08:58None of it was scripted, actually
08:59But I don't feel like my personality really shined on the show
09:05I think that I was kind of boring
09:08And I kind of just, you know, went along with what my husband said
09:11But they didn't really show everything
09:14And, like, all of our fun moments
09:16Like, I really wish that everyone could have seen that
09:19Because, y'all, we had a time
09:21We had a time
09:22And we're a very fun couple
09:25So I don't think I was really, you know, depicted correctly
09:29But it's okay, it's okay
09:31I was still very positive, I will say that
09:34What about you?
09:37I think, for me, it was important for me to just go in and be myself
09:41So, luckily for me, I was happy with the edit
09:46But that doesn't go, I mean, that doesn't go to say that in reality
09:50There are moments where the producers do push
09:53And they do try to get you to do something
09:55You, being a person on the show, have to stand up and be like
09:57No, that's not really me
09:58That's not my personality
09:59I'm not going to say that
10:01And so that's important as well
10:03But, kind of to echo what Brianna said
10:07I do feel, I wish that they showed more of me and Cam's fun times and personalities
10:12Our storyline really evolved around race
10:15Which, I get it
10:16We are an interracial couple
10:17But, like Brianna said, we had so many fun times
10:20Just joking around with each other
10:22Having a good time
10:23So, but, you know, it's TV
10:25So they chose to, you know, focus on the thing that will really push the narrative
10:31Which is the interracial couple
10:33Makes sense
10:34Now, Lauren, specifically, you took a really crazy risk going on Love is Blind
10:38Because you can't see who you're falling in love with
10:40It could have been an ogre, for all you know
10:42It could have been Shrek girl
10:44But if you had a good personality, I don't know
10:46Well, how did you feel that first moment when you saw your eventual, well, I shouldn't say eventual
10:50When you saw your husband
10:52And if you saw him on the street without falling in love with him
10:54Do you think you would have given him the time of day
10:57Seeing him versus not seeing him?
10:59Yes, absolutely
11:01I think that my husband Cam is so handsome
11:04And when I saw him, like I said on the show
11:08To me, he looked like Prince Charming
11:10And I wasn't even just physically
11:11At that point, we had been talking so much and made that connection
11:14It was just really what he embodied
11:16You know, he cared about family
11:19We shared the same values
11:21He was respectful
11:22So even if he wasn't as attractive as maybe I would have liked
11:27Which he was, I was very happy
11:29Let me just state that
11:30I still would have kind of given it a go
11:33I would have tried
11:34Just because I knew that we had that connection
11:36But lucky for me, he was fine
11:39And if I saw him on the street, yes, I would talk to him
11:42Now, Brianna, you did Marry to First Sight season 12
11:47And you're now happily married with a beautiful baby girl to show for it
11:51Given the opportunity, would you do it all over again?
11:54Would I do it all over again?
11:56Jeez
11:57If I had the same partner
12:01And the same outcome, yes
12:03But of course you don't know that
12:05Unless you take a shot
12:07So I think I would do it all over again
12:10I would just have to remain true to myself
12:12And remain open
12:13I think that's the key with Married at First Sight
12:16You have to go into it very open
12:18You can't just be shut down
12:20Yes, I was picky
12:21But at the same time, I was a very open person
12:24You may not get exactly who you said you wanted on paper
12:28But you don't know what's good for you
12:30To be quite honest
12:31Obviously, some stuff didn't work
12:33You were dating for so long
12:35And you put all these things down on paper
12:36But, you know, someone else matches you
12:39And it actually works out if you put the work in
12:41That's a great approach to take with it
12:44Now, Lauren, we saw your love for Cameron evolve
12:46Over the first conversation
12:48And one thing you grappled with as a black one
12:49Was the fact that he is indeed white
12:51In this racially tar society we live in
12:54How was the response initially?
12:56Like, were people overwhelmingly supportive?
12:58Or did you get a lot of haters?
12:59You know, a lot of times we'll have something to say
13:01With black women dating outside and whatnot
13:03And how do you deal with any of that commentary?
13:07Yeah, you know, well, before the show came out
13:09Me and Cameron were married for a whole year and a half
13:12So nobody even knew who we were
13:13We were just a couple walking the streets
13:15And surprisingly, people would stare at us
13:18But I wasn't sure if it's
13:20Do y'all just think we attractive?
13:21Or y'all just don't like what you're looking at?
13:23At times, of course, we live in Georgia
13:25So the climate there can be either black or white, literally
13:28But we never
13:31Lucky for us
13:32But even if we did, it wouldn't be a problem
13:34No one really gave us a hard time
13:36For us, it's been a lot of support
13:38I mean, people shower us with love
13:41And every time we're out on the street
13:42They come up to us and say
13:43You inspire us
13:44You give us hope
13:45We love seeing your story
13:46And that's what we focus on
13:48We try not to focus on
13:49The naysayers or the haters
13:51Because at the end of the day
13:52It's about he and I
13:53And our happiness
13:54And spreading that joy to other people
13:55You gotta say that
13:57Now, do either of you feel pressure as black women
14:01To not embody certain stereotypes on television?
14:05Did you feel like you could be your full and complete selves
14:07And be vulnerable in that space?
14:09Or were you kind of trying to pull back
14:10So you don't look a certain way?
14:13I was 100% myself
14:16I am a strong, independent, black woman
14:19Say that
14:20I am an engineer
14:21I was doing my thing
14:23And like, my personality shines
14:25Like, I mean, I'm a very bubbly person
14:28I wasn't trying to pull back at all
14:30I love my culture
14:31I love my background
14:32I love my family
14:34You know, I mean, we're beautiful people
14:36I love that for us
14:38So no, I wasn't pulling back at all
14:41I was like, I'm here
14:42And y'all better love me
14:44No, that's right
14:46For me, it was the same thing
14:48You know, previously watching reality TV
14:50There had been so many times
14:52Where I didn't feel like I saw a woman
14:55Who really represented me as a black woman
14:58That was quirky and herself
14:59Like, I didn't want to go on there
15:01I didn't want to be catty
15:02I didn't want to make up a character
15:03To get more TV time
15:05Especially going on a dating show
15:06I need somebody to love me for me
15:08Not a character that I'm putting on
15:09To get more screen time
15:11So I went on there as myself
15:13I prayed about it
15:14I said, you know
15:15If anything is going to come from this
15:17Whether it's a husband
15:18Camera time
15:20Whatever it may be
15:21I need it to be
15:22Because I am who I am
15:24And proud in that
15:25But girl, that was me all the way
15:26Y'all didn't see me with my bonnet on?
15:29I was not playing, honey
15:31I said, y'all going to get all of me
15:32Fool me how I am
15:34Every day, all day
15:35So, and I'm happy because of that
15:37Because so many women come up to me
15:39And they're like
15:39Thank God that you are yourself
15:41Representation matters
15:43And there's so many different types
15:45Of black women
15:46And I really hope that reality TV
15:48Starts to shed more light
15:50On the spectrum of black women
15:52We're not just one dimensional
15:53So, I love that I can represent
15:56Something for people who relate
15:58You know
15:58Absolutely
15:59Now ladies, you've both
16:01Proven that black women
16:02Can find real love on reality TV
16:04There's been debate about that
16:05And it stands the test of time
16:07Do you have any words of encouragement
16:09To the women in the room
16:10Who are looking to find
16:11Their own love in their life
16:12Or maybe considering doing something
16:14Like you did
16:15Taking that type of risk
16:16Words of encouragement
16:21I would say
16:23Do not hold back
16:24Don't
16:25Always be yourself
16:26Don't
16:27Dumb yourself down
16:28Or think that you can't be yourself
16:30Because you won't be accepted
16:31By people
16:32Like I am
16:34If you are strong and independent
16:35Be strong and independent
16:36But know that
16:37If you do have a partner
16:39If you are looking for a partner
16:40You can
16:40Kind of
16:41You know
16:42Just lean on that person
16:43Don't dumb yourself down
16:44But lean on that person
16:45To be the person that you are
16:46And to shine through your relationship
16:48That's
16:49You know
16:50Some words of encouragement
16:50That I could say
16:51Yeah
16:52Yeah
16:54I mean
16:54She took the words
16:55Right out of my mouth
16:56It's so important
16:57To be yourself
16:58And also
16:59Just
16:59Know what you want
17:01I know we all have our list
17:02I need it to be
17:03A, B, C, D, and D
17:04But at the same time
17:06Be a little open-minded
17:07Because
17:08The blessing that you want
17:10May not come wrapped
17:11In what you think
17:11That it's supposed to look like
17:13Period
17:13So just keep an open mind
17:15Keep an open heart
17:16You know
17:17I'm not saying settle
17:18Because people are like
17:19I ain't settling for nothing
17:20I ain't doing that
17:20But you know what
17:21You never know
17:22What God may present you
17:25And the timing
17:26So just be ready
17:27You'll know
17:27You know
17:28So just be yourself
17:29And it's gonna come to you
17:30All right
17:32Awesome
17:32Brianna and Lauren
17:33Thank you so much
17:34For your time today
17:35For sharing your experiences
17:37Your wisdom
17:37And being so transparent
17:39And Essence fam
17:40We truly hope you
17:41Enjoyed this conversation
17:42Just as much as we did
17:43Thank y'all
17:45Thank you guys
17:46Thank you so much
17:47Give a big hand clap
17:48For Brianna and Lauren
17:49Thank you
17:50Thank you
17:51Thank you
17:52It's an honor to be here
17:54Thank you
17:55We're honored to have you
17:56Thanks
17:57Showed up
17:59Shout out
18:00What'd he do
18:02Yeah
18:03Pimpy
18:07Oh boy
18:08What y'all know about her
18:11Supermodel
18:14Fresh out of Elle magazine
18:16Buy her own bottles
18:19Look pimp juice
18:21I keep me running
18:22Bad than a mother
18:24Oh nah
18:26I can't say you're a bad girl
18:27Baby
18:27If you're a bad girl
18:29Oh
18:30Players when you see me
18:33Act like you know me
18:35I keep a dollar worth of dimes
18:38You know pimp it ain't easy
18:41For all my chicks in the club
18:44Who knows how to cut a rug
18:46If you're a bad girl
18:49Get at me bad girl
18:51Work me baby
18:54Shaking in the way I like
18:56I'm ready to be bad
18:58I need a bad girl
18:59Get at me bad girl
19:02What sexy ladies
19:05Coming on with me tonight
19:07I'm ready to be bad
19:09I need a bad girl
19:10Supermodel
Comments