- 11 hours ago
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00:00This is the world's strictest school and I have to do whatever they say for the rest of the day.
00:04Be quiet!
00:07And if she quits before the end of the day, I win the Matter Cup.
00:11Ugh.
00:11It's not cringey.
00:12Yeah, it is.
00:13Salish saw her brother Hudson and then Brent Rivera both try to survive at really strict schools and she thinks she can do it too.
00:19Yeah, I mean, it's not even that strict.
00:21Okay, good luck.
00:22By the way, you're running late for your first class.
00:23I think you're going to quit in like 10 minutes.
00:25No, I'm not.
00:25Have fun.
00:28How hard could this even be?
00:30What up, teach?
00:36We have a new student.
00:37What's your name?
00:38Salish.
00:39This, not allowed.
00:41While Salish is going through her school day, I will be hiding in this room watching everything on this monitor.
00:46Don't worry, I was done anyway.
00:47Salish thinks this is a real school, but what she doesn't know is everybody here is an actor.
00:51And they only have one job, to make sure she quits before the end of the day.
00:56Phone?
00:57Excuse me.
00:58Hand it over.
00:58I'm not giving you my phone.
01:00There is no phone in this class.
01:01Go ahead, I'll put my backpack.
01:02No, then you give me the entire backpack.
01:04What?
01:04But you'll need your book.
01:05Bro.
01:06I have found hundreds of strict school horror stories to inspire everything I have planned
01:10for Salish today.
01:11There's absolutely no chance she doesn't quit.
01:13This is going to be over-the-top, strict school nightmare stuff.
01:17Skirt.
01:17The rule is the skirt must be four inches above the knee.
01:20Yours is seven.
01:21What?
01:22It's too short.
01:22Do I see double pierced ears?
01:24Triple actually.
01:25Oh, single piercing only.
01:27And no loops.
01:28Studs please.
01:28Okay.
01:29If Salish thinks this teacher is bad, just wait, because she's the nicest of the bunch.
01:33The rest that I've got coming are even meaner.
01:35This is all wrong.
01:36You need to go to the bathroom and check yourself, or you're going to end up like, Jeremiah here.
01:41Nope.
01:41She must be thinking, this is the weirdest thing.
01:43This kid has got a cone on his head.
01:45Poor Jeremiah.
01:46Okay.
01:47Get out while you can.
01:49Wait, where'd she go?
01:50We don't have cameras everywhere.
01:51I have no idea where she went.
01:52I guess she's going to change?
01:54I'm so confused.
01:55I was kind of joking, but he's in a cone?
01:57Like, that is so weird.
01:59Also, what about my outfit is bad?
02:00I don't understand.
02:01I mean, I'm wearing the dress code for them, so what more do they want me to do?
02:05And my earrings?
02:06Why does it matter how many hoops I have?
02:08Let's go, guys.
02:09Salish has no idea I'm here.
02:11Watching everything that's happening.
02:13Nothing in here is going to be too extreme or dangerous.
02:15It's just going to drive her crazy, and she will quit, and I will win the Matter Cup,
02:19and she will have to shovel snow, and she will have to do the dishes.
02:22Now I think that my outfit looks exactly like the other kids.
02:25This might be a little harder than I thought it would be.
02:27Hmm.
02:28That'll do.
02:29Your posture is a little off, but we can work on that later.
02:32My posture?
02:33Hey.
02:34Hey.
02:35What's your name?
02:36Hmm.
02:36Okay.
02:37Hey, my name's Josu.
02:39Okay.
02:39What is with these kids?
02:41Young lady, a new student's place is at the front of the class.
02:45Yes, ma'am.
02:46My name is Miss Bastyle.
02:48Hi, Miss Bastyle.
02:49Miss Bastyle.
02:50Miss Bastyle.
02:52Miss Bastyle.
02:53Miss Bastyle.
02:55Miss Bastyle.
02:56Miss Bastyle.
02:57Miss Bastyle.
02:59Miss Bastyle.
03:01Miss Bastyle.
03:02Miss Bastyle.
03:03Miss Bastyle.
03:03Miss Bastyle.
03:03Miss Bastyle.
03:04Miss Bastyle.
03:04Miss Bastyle.
03:05Miss Bastyle.
03:05Miss Bastyle.
03:06Miss Bastyle.
03:06Miss Bastyle.
03:07Miss Bastyle.
03:07Miss Bastyle.
03:08Miss Bastyle.
03:08Miss Bastyle.
03:09Miss Bastyle.
03:09Miss Bastyle.
03:10Miss Bastyle.
03:10Miss Bastyle.
03:11Everything is so funny.
03:12I think you need a lesson.
03:14Jeremiah, would you please go back to your desk
03:15so the class can all go over the school rules?
03:19Yes, ma'am.
03:19Just so you know, Ian signed up for this.
03:21We told him ahead of time, are you good wearing a cone?
03:23And he said, yeah, he's down.
03:24But it's funny.
03:26Is no one going to react to that?
03:28For those of you who follow the Matter Cup,
03:30you know two things.
03:31One, Salish always seems to win,
03:33and it's just not fair anymore.
03:35And number two, you know that the loser
03:36always has to do chores around the house.
03:38This week, the loser is going to have to do the dishes.
03:41But also, the loser has to shovel a bunch of snow
03:44because we're going to Colorado for the week.
03:46No cheating in school.
03:48Always listen to your teacher.
03:51Only speak if you're spoken to.
03:54What is wrong with this podcast?
03:56Only speak if you're spoken to
03:57is like the exact opposite of Salish.
03:59No mercy.
04:01I don't want to hear.
04:02Darn, shoot.
04:03Dagnabbit.
04:04I don't want to hear any of it.
04:06Darn.
04:06What did you just say?
04:08Nothing, nothing, nothing.
04:09You're working on a detention.
04:10Oh, darn.
04:13She's going to get in trouble for saying darn.
04:15She's not going to make it through this all day.
04:16No makeup.
04:18Whoa, okay.
04:19You're wearing makeup.
04:20What'd you say?
04:20Nothing.
04:22No phones.
04:23Yep, I learned that one.
04:25Always raise your hand.
04:27That's how I know you actually know the answer.
04:30And most importantly,
04:31No fun.
04:33Clearly.
04:33We're finally going to start our history lesson.
04:36But first of all,
04:37Who was president during the great molasses flood of Boston?
04:40How do you even know that?
04:42I don't know.
04:43I didn't raise my hand.
04:44That's how I knew.
04:45You didn't know the answer.
04:46Do it again,
04:47and you're going to get a punishment.
04:49And the answer is...
04:50What about Wilson?
04:51In what state was the Roswell crash?
04:56Hmm.
04:57I raised my hand.
04:58Yes.
04:59Exactly.
04:59What's the answer?
05:00I don't know.
05:01Why did you raise your hand?
05:02Because you...
05:03Ten push-ups.
05:04Why don't you do ten push-ups?
05:06Because I didn't get the question wrong.
05:09I guess I'm going to do my exercise.
05:10Salish is not intimidated by physical activity.
05:12She's a very strong kid.
05:13One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.
05:23Good.
05:24You got a little slow there at the end.
05:26I see your ten push-ups.
05:27She's giving it back to her.
05:29Don't talk back, little lady.
05:30Do you know the penalty for talking back?
05:32Sorry.
05:33How is Salish not, like, laughing or quitting?
05:35The kid has a cone on his head for the last ten minutes.
05:37These are your exams.
05:38You have ten minutes to finish them.
05:40And believe me,
05:41you do not want to get one wrong answer.
05:45Ten minutes.
05:46The clock is ticking.
05:49What is she doing?
05:58No wrong answers.
06:00What is wrong with this?
06:01I have ten minutes to do this.
06:02This whole bunch.
06:04I cannot do this.
06:06I did do ten push-ups.
06:07Never give up.
06:08That's a wrong one.
06:08What the heck?
06:09Is she FaceTiming someone?
06:10I don't want to see anything unfinished.
06:13You're on the first page.
06:15Sorry.
06:17Okay.
06:18She's doing something
06:19that she's not supposed to be doing right now.
06:21Erase.
06:22These things are insane.
06:23What the heck is going on?
06:25I know.
06:25I'm literally just circling
06:26whatever is on this desk.
06:28I don't know the answers.
06:31Time's up.
06:33Pencils down.
06:34Please line up to turn in your exam.
06:35I'm way too old to shovel snow.
06:42We all know this.
06:43My back is going to hurt.
06:44I mean, I'm years old.
06:46Too old to be shoveling snow.
06:47So please, for once,
06:49let me win the Matter Cup.
06:51Please let me win the Matter Cup.
06:52Jeremiah, Salish,
06:54I said time's up.
06:55Please bring your tests up to the desk.
06:57Give it to me.
06:58Give it to me.
06:59You didn't do anything?
07:01Are you kidding me?
07:03Blake.
07:04What do you expect?
07:05On my cone.
07:05The cone's too, like, thick.
07:07I can't see anything.
07:08You're having a hysterical thing.
07:09What do you expect me to do with this?
07:11You're going to have to do this at lunch.
07:12She is just sneaking out.
07:14At lunch?
07:15We have some security cameras around the school,
07:17so I can see it.
07:18Where's she going?
07:19I hate this school,
07:20and I'm so confused.
07:21Where are all the people?
07:22What the heck?
07:23Okay, let's check this class.
07:25Okay, that one's locked.
07:27What?
07:28Where are all the people, guys?
07:29There's only enough kids for the one class.
07:32There's no people in the window.
07:33Look.
07:34Let's check the other two classes.
07:36No, just don't go in that class.
07:38Don't go in that.
07:38No one's in there.
07:43Guys, I'm getting really confused.
07:44Why is nobody in any of the classes?
07:47What if she opens this door?
07:50This is so weird.
07:51I don't know where my classes are,
07:52who my teacher is.
07:54This school is not it.
07:56This happened.
07:57I'm so confused.
07:59No one told her to come to the next class.
08:01Now she's just free.
08:03Okay, so now I'm trying to find my class,
08:05and I cannot find it for anything.
08:07I hear a lot of noise coming out of here, though.
08:09Oh, wait.
08:10I think she's going to the right class.
08:11Yes!
08:12Oh, that was close.
08:14I cannot believe that it's the same kids
08:16in the same class with the same teacher.
08:18Okay.
08:19How has she not already quit?
08:20Comment below.
08:21Isn't it time for her to lose?
08:22I don't want to shovel any snow.
08:23The snow in Colorado is really heavy.
08:25It's like back-breaking heavy,
08:27and I don't want to have to do it.
08:28So will you please quit, Salish?
08:29Breathing's not going to help.
08:34It's time to go in.
08:35Come on.
08:37Young lady, you finally decided to join us.
08:40Get over here.
08:40Hello?
08:41Do you even know what class you're in?
08:43Ballet class?
08:43No.
08:44This is etiquette class.
08:46Salish hates following rules,
08:47so etiquette class might be just the thing
08:49we need to get her to quit.
08:50Today is posture day.
08:51Take a deep breath.
08:53Cock your head so that it's perfectly straight.
08:55No.
08:56That way.
08:57No.
08:57Straighter.
08:58Straighten your legs.
08:59Don't lean.
09:00We need to see what your posture is like
09:02while walking.
09:05Oh, no.
09:06All that attitude.
09:07What?
09:07That's how I walk.
09:08Here's a book you don't have to read.
09:10Put it on your head.
09:11Find your balance.
09:12Now take a stroll.
09:18Oh, okay.
09:20Yeah, she just dropped the book right off her head.
09:22That should be a consequence, teacher, right?
09:24Young lady, that will not do.
09:25Well, I made it.
09:26There was too much sass in your walk.
09:28We are actually going to have our model student, Nick,
09:31show you how it should be done.
09:33Promenade.
09:37Nobody is going to walk that slow.
09:40The heck?
09:42Bravo, Nick.
09:44I did the exact same thing, but faster.
09:46He had poise.
09:48Are you going to walk like this?
09:49He had elegance and no sass.
09:51If it makes you feel any better,
09:52you did it way better than I could have ever done.
09:54Salish, I hope you learned something today.
09:59It's time for lunch.
10:00Eyes straight ahead, arms by your side, chest out.
10:04At least we have lunch.
10:07If only you knew.
10:08Salish's favorite part of regular school is lunch with her friends.
10:11But today, she's having lunch with the teacher.
10:14She's not going to like it at all.
10:19Well, I'm supposed to sit when you focus.
10:22Welcome to lunch.
10:23This is a lesson on manners at lunch.
10:26Here's the thing about Salish.
10:27At home, doesn't even use forks.
10:28Salish sometimes will actually literally put her hand over the fork
10:31to grab her food with her hand and eat it.
10:33So, I don't think she's going to handle this culinary etiquette very well.
10:36Spoon.
10:37Pork on the left.
10:39Knife.
10:40On the right.
10:42Do I hear someone talking at this end of the table?
10:45No, Miss Hoth, I mean Boston.
10:46Okay, it looks like I need to sit and have lunch with you two.
10:51Oh, boy.
10:52Let's talk about polite conversation.
10:54This crazy thing happened in the bathroom.
10:56I saw a humongous...
10:57Excuse me?
10:57You do not talk about bathrooms.
10:59What other things do you think you should talk about?
11:02Germs.
11:03I like that.
11:04Dog puke?
11:04Dog puke kind of looks like soup.
11:06Oh, my gosh.
11:07Okay.
11:07Are we eating soup today?
11:08Yeah.
11:09We are not talking about anything that comes out of the body.
11:12We are talking about how to correctly put things in the body.
11:16Put the plate down.
11:17I can see myself in it.
11:18Want to hear a cool sound?
11:19No, that is not.
11:20That is a horrible sound.
11:21And you're going to break your plastic forks.
11:24I can't take that down.
11:25I'm going to have a flashback.
11:26Yay!
11:26Oh, now, here's the pool.
11:28Yay!
11:29Salish!
11:29Salish!
11:31Stop!
11:32Bring in the soup!
11:34If it is very hot, you may blow on it very gently.
11:38Oh.
11:39My bad.
11:40Salish is not intimidated enough by this teacher,
11:42so I've got an even scarier one coming next.
11:45Who's that?
11:45That's Mr. Smiley.
11:46He doesn't look very smiley.
11:48That's the happiest he ever lost.
11:49So you do not want to mess with him.
11:52What's wonderful about our salads at this school, Salish,
11:55is that the lettuce is fertilized with manure from the stables.
12:00It's totally organic.
12:02Proper way to eat pizza.
12:03No, no, no, not with your hands.
12:05Put that down.
12:06Actually, I'm from New York,
12:07and I'll teach you the way to eat pizza.
12:09We are practicing fine dining.
12:11And then the crust comes, and you, uh, uh, no.
12:14No, no, oh, God.
12:16Put it down.
12:17Use your fork and rice.
12:18That's how you are dancing.
12:19Like this.
12:20All right, we got dessert now.
12:22You think after this disaster, we get dessert?
12:25Yeah.
12:25There is no dessert.
12:26It's not a thing, Navid.
12:31I have to deal with you.
12:32Open wide.
12:33Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
12:35That'll teach you.
12:36Is it getting stuck in your braces?
12:38Oh, oh, oh, oh, sorry.
12:39Disgusting.
12:45She's running away.
12:46Yes, I knew it.
12:47She's going to quit.
12:48Yes.
12:49Is she gone?
12:50Is she gone?
12:50Did it work?
12:51I think it worked.
12:52Here.
12:53Mm.
12:53Mm.
12:54It tastes like chocolate.
12:56What is happening right now?
12:58That was disgusting, but my dad thinks I'm going to quit because of that?
13:01He's wrong.
13:04She's on the swing?
13:08She should have quit by now,
13:09but I got something really good up my sleeve.
13:10Our next lesson will be handwriting.
13:12Texting the teacher, telling her, game on.
13:14She knows what to do.
13:17I'm sorry, class.
13:18I will be right back.
13:19Behave while I'm away.
13:23The thing Salish hates more than anything
13:25is being blamed for something she didn't do.
13:27Oh, this is going to be funny.
13:28Everybody in the class knows what to do.
13:29What's happening?
13:45Just wait until she gets back.
13:47Oh, she's going to be so mad.
13:51Look, look, look, look, look.
13:52They're going crazy.
13:55They're going crazy.
13:56Listen, you've got to get her to quit.
13:58She's so sweet.
13:59This is really hard for me.
14:00I want to take this thing home.
14:02You've got to help me win.
14:03I thought this was a strict school.
14:05If only you knew.
14:11Go back in there.
14:12They're waiting for you.
14:12Do it!
14:13Do it!
14:14Do it!
14:15Do it!
14:16Wait to see what they say when the teacher comes back in.
14:21Guys, be quiet.
14:24Not all of us are going to get in trouble.
14:25Don't worry.
14:26I have a plan.
14:27What is going on?
14:27I'm so confused.
14:29Just be quiet for now.
14:30Don't say anything.
14:33What's all this?
14:36Yes?
14:36Salish did it.
14:38What?
14:38I didn't do anything.
14:40Salish did it.
14:41What?
14:42I didn't do anything.
14:44I didn't do anything.
14:45You'll all be staying.
14:48You'll all be staying after school.
14:51I didn't do anything.
14:53You either leave this school right decimated or take detention for a week.
14:58This is it.
14:58This is it.
14:59This is it.
14:59She's going to leave.
15:03I guess I'll take detention.
15:06What?
15:07Detention?
15:08Who picks detention when they have the option to leave the school?
15:10How much do you hate dishes?
15:12Salish.
15:12Just quit.
15:13I didn't do anything, though.
15:15She did it.
15:16She did it.
15:16She did it.
15:17She did it.
15:18I can go to detention right now.
15:19She did it.
15:20She did it.
15:21She did it.
15:22She did it.
15:23She did it.
15:23She's so mad right now.
15:26She's going to quit.
15:27She did it.
15:28She did it.
15:29She did it.
15:29Remember, all these ideas came from experiences on Instagram with the strictest schools in
15:34the world, so you can only imagine how bad detention is going to be.
15:37What even just happened?
15:39At first, all these kids were like robots, and then they started blaming everything on me.
15:43I'm so confused.
15:44And now I have to go to detention?
15:46Oh, my gosh.
15:47Okay.
15:47She told me to go into number 10, and I do not want to go to detention.
15:51Actually, I kind of do, because then I don't have to be with Miss Bad Style.
15:55Bad Style.
15:55Bad Style.
15:56Whatever.
15:57All right.
15:57No more messing around.
15:58I'm bringing out the big guns.
16:00This is going to be nightmare detention.
16:02There's no way she makes it through detention.
16:03Okay.
16:04I found the room.
16:04This cannot be as bad as Miss Bad Style.
16:07Let's go.
16:08Hey, Jordan, can I talk to you?
16:10Sure.
16:10Ian, what's up?
16:11Yeah, so I don't think it was really fair that all the other kids were blaming her for
16:14the Wimpy Cushion thing.
16:15Oh, don't worry about that.
16:16She'll understand later.
16:16I got to get her to quit, because I'm trying to win the da-da-da-da-da-matter cup.
16:20In order to win that thing, she's got to quit.
16:22In order for her to quit, you guys got to keep being hard on her.
16:24Keep keeping it strict.
16:25Strict, strict, strict, strict.
16:26Okay?
16:26Yeah, yeah, yeah.
16:27Time for detention.
16:28Is this detention?
16:29Oh.
16:29Hi, Mr. Smiley.
16:32I think I have detention.
16:34Of course you have detention.
16:35Why else would you be here?
16:36Salish.
16:37Take a seat.
16:38I know exactly who you are, but let me tell you a little bit about me.
16:41I'm your detention teacher.
16:43Okay.
16:44Trained in American karate.
16:46I take it serious.
16:49I haven't had lunch yet.
16:50So what brings you in here?
16:51Criminal?
16:51I didn't do anything.
16:52Classic.
16:53Coming from a criminal.
16:54Everybody started throwing paper, and started getting all crazy, and then they blamed it
16:58on me, even though I didn't do anything.
17:00I heard...
17:00Sounds like a guilty party to me.
17:04You see the scuff marks on the ground?
17:05Those are the skid marks of lost souls.
17:08Kids just like you, who tell me things other than the truth.
17:12You will clean them up.
17:14Okay.
17:14Salish always cleans up after herself.
17:16She does her own laundry.
17:17She cleans her room.
17:18But you know she hates cleaning other people's messes, especially if it's on the ground.
17:23I want these scuff marks removed, and you're going to use your best friend, Mr. Tootbrush.
17:28This detention is going to keep getting worse and worse.
17:31Okay, but there's a broom right there.
17:33Can I not just use that?
17:34Oh, this broom right here?
17:36Nice little yellow bristles and the wood broom.
17:41There's no broom right there.
17:42Whoa, he's intense.
17:43Two brush skid marks.
17:45You have 10 minutes.
17:46Okay.
17:47I'll be back.
17:48What was that?
17:53Oh my gosh, those are everywhere.
17:54This is not coming off.
17:57We got all this from Instagram.
17:58This really happens.
17:59Detention teachers that make you clean the floor.
18:02Some of these schools are whack.
18:03Do schools even make kids do this anymore?
18:05What is wrong with this place?
18:07Even if none of these marks come off, I'm not going to quit.
18:11I am not going to quit.
18:12I'm not going to quit.
18:12What's going to get this kid to quit?
18:15Okay, Salish.
18:17Let's see how you did.
18:18I cleaned one.
18:19You cleaned one in 10 minutes.
18:21Yes.
18:21I see what's going on right here.
18:23You want them real bad kids.
18:24What?
18:25You're tough, huh?
18:26You're strong.
18:26You're smart.
18:27Maybe.
18:28Come on.
18:28Just do it.
18:29Just walk out.
18:30Quit.
18:30It's over.
18:30It's easy.
18:31This sucks, right?
18:32Just quit.
18:32Quit.
18:33We've got the perfect thing for you, Salish.
18:36Oh, gosh.
18:37Oh, no.
18:38Oh, my gosh.
18:39Oh, no.
18:39Oh, no.
18:40Oh, this is awesome.
18:41Actually, look.
18:41There's a pail attached to a pole.
18:43The only way to get the pail down is to get wet.
18:45I know she's going to quit when she gets soaked.
18:47That doesn't seem very nice.
18:48She did it to me once.
18:49And open.
18:52So, I feel like this is just payback.
18:54I'll do anything I have to do to win.
18:55Yeah.
18:56I'm going to be right back, right?
18:57Okay.
18:58Yeah.
18:58Yeah.
18:58You keep watching that.
18:59This is so good.
18:59Oh, my God.
19:00Oh, no, no, no, no.
19:02Mr. Smiling.
19:03Mr. Smiling.
19:04Mr. Smiling.
19:05Oh, she can't hold it for much longer.
19:07I know it.
19:08Help.
19:08Help.
19:09Help.
19:09Help.
19:10Jeremiah.
19:10Jeremiah.
19:11Help me.
19:11Whoa.
19:12What is he doing?
19:13I didn't think it would be this good.
19:14Okay.
19:14Let go.
19:15Let go.
19:15Yes.
19:15Let go.
19:16I'm holding it.
19:16Okay.
19:16I got it.
19:16Get the desk.
19:17Get the desk.
19:18Oh, my gosh.
19:18Get the desk.
19:19Okay.
19:19Do you have it?
19:19Okay.
19:19Let go.
19:20Do you have it?
19:20Let go.
19:21Let go.
19:21You sure?
19:22Yep.
19:22Okay.
19:22There we go.
19:23Perfect.
19:23He did not just do that.
19:25Thank you so much.
19:25Of course.
19:26Of course.
19:26Just please don't tell anybody.
19:28Don't tell Jordan.
19:29Just don't.
19:30Okay.
19:32He's getting paid to get her to quit and he helped her.
19:35What?
19:36Don't tell anyone like who.
19:39What do we have here?
19:40I did it all by myself.
19:42Congratulations.
19:42Mr. Smiling got a bunch of tricks up my sleeve.
19:44I know he seems scary and mean, but he's actually the sweetest guy on earth.
19:48I got some blindfolded reading exercises.
19:50You got to dust the ceiling, scrape all that gum off that.
19:52I actually, I'm feeling a little sick.
19:55I need like allergies, you know?
19:57Can I go to the nurse's?
19:59Okay.
20:00Go ahead.
20:01Thanks.
20:02Good luck.
20:02You'll need it.
20:03I had a feeling Salish might pull something like this, so I made a plan.
20:06You think the detention teacher's scary?
20:08Wait until you see the nurse.
20:13Hello.
20:14Hello, Salish.
20:16Oh, she's creeping me out.
20:18Ew.
20:19Hi.
20:19I think I'm really sick.
20:21The nurse's office is actually right there, so I can't talk too loud.
20:26She's right there.
20:27I'm Nurse Winky.
20:29Can I help you?
20:30I'm sick.
20:30Oh, well, I have a lot of things to make you better.
20:33Come on, thanks.
20:35Sit down.
20:37Hello.
20:37So tell Miss Winky what it is that's bothering you today.
20:42I'm a little sick, I think.
20:43Are you sure you're sick?
20:44I'm pretty sure.
20:45Well, sometimes friends come in and they're not really sick.
20:49Oh, who would do that?
20:51Sometimes they do, so we need to check your reflexes.
20:55Okay.
20:56Okay, just one moment.
20:58This actually might make her quit.
20:59I have a nice tool to help you do that.
21:02Oh.
21:04Oh.
21:05Oh.
21:06Hold still.
21:06Don't move.
21:07I'm going to tap your knee.
21:09Oh.
21:10I actually feel better now.
21:11I think so.
21:12You were faking.
21:13No, I wasn't.
21:15Oh, suddenly you're feeling much better, aren't you, Salish?
21:17Well, guess where you get to go now?
21:18I think you need to go to the principal's office.
21:20Okay, I'll go.
21:21No, let me take you.
21:23Yeah, I got you.
21:23Don't worry, I got it.
21:24I know where it is.
21:25Bye-bye.
21:27Faker.
21:29How'd I do?
21:34I hate this school.
21:36Nurse was creepy.
21:37Principal is terrifying.
21:40Mom?
21:41Miss Matter.
21:43Have a seat.
21:46Last time we played for the Matter Cup, my wife was on Team Salish,
21:49but I have since convinced her to be Team Jordan this time.
21:52So, she is going to be the most heartbroken, disappointed mother ever,
21:57and Salish is just going to melt and give up.
22:00We strive to mold wise minds, strong bodies, and moral characters.
22:05You, however, Miss Sally Matter,
22:09you've been here one day and have managed to be disobedient,
22:13insubordinate, defiant, unruly, and disruptive in several ways.
22:17What do you have to say for yourself?
22:18I didn't do it.
22:19Don't say anything.
22:20One of the things Salish hates the most is getting bad grades.
22:23Only worse than that, disappointing her mother.
22:26There is absolutely no way she's going to make it through this.
22:29Just getting my Matter Cup all ready,
22:31so it'll look really good in my office when I win.
22:34You did not adhere to the dress code.
22:36What? I'm...
22:37You instigated a violent pooper fight.
22:40Paper fight?
22:41You pranked your teacher, Miss Bastyle, with a whoopee cushion.
22:46I didn't do that either.
22:48And you said a curse word.
22:51What?
22:52I do not know where these young ladies learn words like, darn.
22:57You faked a state of sickness.
23:00You lied repeatedly to teachers.
23:02And you talked back.
23:03No, I didn't.
23:04Don't talk back.
23:05Now, what do you have to say for yourself?
23:06I didn't do it.
23:07Don't talk back.
23:09Lauren looks so disappointed.
23:11It's like heartbreaking.
23:12These are all very bad, naughty, horrid, mean, selfish, and recalcitrant behaviours.
23:19I'm so sorry.
23:20She was taught better.
23:21I didn't do anything.
23:23Don't talk back.
23:24Mom, how can you believe her?
23:25She's not even telling the truth.
23:26It's on her pink end.
23:27Fucking a lie.
23:28Now, the way I see it, you have two choices.
23:32You can leave immediately, and we will pretend that this never happened.
23:35Or two, you can stay in this school, but your grades will be part of your permanent record
23:41at any school you attend.
23:43Wait, F's permanently?
23:44Oh, F's.
23:46Salish, we have to go right now.
23:47We have to, we've got to go.
23:50Let me think about this.
23:51So if I stand and I have F's permanently on my record?
23:55And you'll never get into college.
23:56It's easy.
24:04Leave with Mom, or have F's forever on your transcript.
24:07Come on, Salish, just get up and leave.
24:09Hmm, F's on my record.
24:11This is really hard.
24:12Let me think.
24:13I'm just kidding.
24:14I know this is all fake.
24:16No way.
24:17This is not fake.
24:18You use the actor Mr. Smiley from Dorman.
24:21Wait, he works with Dorman?
24:22How obvious can you be?
24:23Also, I know Ian.
24:25He was in another video with us.
24:26Are you kidding me?
24:27Yes, Ian, we worked with him already.
24:29There were no kids in any classes.
24:31Didn't you think to hire extras?
24:33The computers from the 70s are not even plugged in.
24:37So I could stay here all day.
24:39No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
24:40Well, I never.
24:45You know what?
24:45I'm just, I'm done.
24:47I'm done.
24:47I've been here 12 hours.
24:49I mean, I didn't even get a trailer.
24:5220 years of method acting classes for this, for this.
24:56Don't forget to pay me.
24:58What?
24:58Mom, I'm really disappointed.
25:00I thought you were Team Salish.
25:03Rowan.
25:04What did I?
25:04He works for DAR, dude.
25:07Dude, how was I supposed to know?
25:08Just, I need a minute.
25:09I quit.
25:10Hand it over.
25:12Are you kidding?
25:13Hand it over.
25:15Oh, you had to have the light?
25:17Yeah, it makes me look younger.
25:18How did you know?
25:19This is mine now.
25:20Let's go home.
25:20Come on.
25:21Out of this school.
25:22Let's go.
25:22Come on.
25:23Hurry up.
25:27Say, you want to help me out?
25:28No.
25:28You did lose the matter cup, though.
25:30I know.
25:30I don't even have the right shoes.
25:31You can help me.
25:32Eh, it's fine.
25:33I'm going to get a snowboard.
25:34Hey.
25:35Sorry, don't.
25:36You just dropped my phone in the snow.
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