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Short filmTranscript
00:00Listen, no one's safe.
00:01No one is safe, I can tell you that.
00:04It's not bad, it's just, oh my god.
00:07I have Tourette syndrome.
00:09you, bitch.
00:11Oh, no, no!
00:13And me and Colin are not married yet.
00:15Run, run, run!
00:18Do you guys let the alpacas be at weddings?
00:22We haven't started a single thing.
00:23No wedding planning done.
00:25Yeah.
00:25Nothing.
00:26So that's the first thing we're thinking about,
00:28was if alpacas are coming?
00:30Because you haven't really asked me for any help, so.
00:33That's our first child that's engaged to be married.
00:37I would love to be super involved.
00:40Can we talk?
00:41Yeah, honey.
00:42OK.
00:43This is about me and my dad, because I need clarity.
00:48I heard that Colin asked for y'all's blessing,
00:52and you said that there was no blessing to give.
00:55I mean it to be like, I'll do whatever
00:57Baylen wants to do.
00:58That is my blessing.
00:59That is my like, hey, if Baylen's OK, we are OK.
01:03What's really sunk in there, now it's them.
01:06It's not her, it's them.
01:08We have been talking about our marriage,
01:12and it started with some premarital counseling.
01:17I thought everything was fine, but this is definitely a curveball.
01:21So I don't want you guys to be offended, but I think some premarital counseling would be a good tool to have.
01:45Right now, I feel weird that my parents are bringing up premarital therapy.
01:52I'm sure this wasn't the birthday gift Colin was expecting.
01:55What the hell?
01:57It's not to test your fit.
02:00This isn't like, let's see if we fit, and if we don't, we're breaking up.
02:03That's not, that's not the...
02:05And you and dad did this?
02:06Yeah, that's not the...
02:07It was a requirement to get married in church.
02:08It was a requirement in the Catholic diocese.
02:11You know, like we want you guys to really like, get everything that you can in your corner.
02:17Get as grounded as possible.
02:18Get as grounded as possible.
02:19That's exactly it.
02:22I finally feel like things are in a better place with the DeBreeze.
02:25It's my birthday.
02:26We're all getting along and having a good time.
02:29And then premarital counseling popped up, and it's a complete shock.
02:34That's important stuff.
02:36It really is, because life is tough.
02:38Yeah, it is.
02:39You add children and them kids.
02:42It doesn't hurt to kind of tackle some of the other intricacies
02:46that will come into play as your marriage develops over the years.
02:50I know that Alan and Julie are always just trying to help,
02:54but I just hope that they don't think Baelin and I's relationship is not a healthy relationship.
03:02All right, guys, it's getting late.
03:04Thank you for having us.
03:05I appreciate you guys for coming.
03:06Yes.
03:07I was like nervous about saying anything, because I didn't want you to be offended.
03:10Please don't be offended.
03:11I don't feel offended.
03:13I want you to be the opposite of offended.
03:15I want you to be like, okay, they want it to work.
03:19I think this suggestion could be perceived a little harshly,
03:24only because Al was a little tough with Colin.
03:27I'm very confident that Colin is committed to Baelin,
03:31but I do have some reservations about how healthy and happy the relationship will be
03:37if you don't make sure that you're growing together as a team.
03:41So what do you think?
03:47Of the marriage counseling?
03:49Are you offended?
03:51It's hard to read you sometimes.
03:56It's our relationship, our marriage.
03:58And given the history, like it's not always been like a easy pathway with your parents.
04:07You know that.
04:07It's been kind of rocky, so.
04:09Okay.
04:13I think it really just comes down to her parents being really overprotective and wanting the best for
04:19Baelin.
04:20And I feel like I'm trying to do everything in my power to show that to them, that I want the same
04:26thing, that we're on the same page. And sometimes it just feels like it's never enough.
04:32I just appreciated them bringing it up personally.
04:36Mm-hmm.
04:37Because I didn't look at it as a bad thing.
04:43Okay.
04:43I think for right now, I just want to take some time to think it over.
04:48Uh, maybe talk to my parents, family members that may have done something like this,
04:54and kind of get their opinion on it as well.
05:12Good morning, everybody.
05:14Good morning.
05:16Today, we're taking our first tour of a possible wedding venue.
05:20But before we leave, I need Colin's help putting in hair clip-ins that I bought.
05:28Can I have some help here trying to section this?
05:31Help doing what?
05:32Do you know how to section?
05:34No, I do not.
05:35Okay.
05:36I don't know how you do your own hair.
05:39It's called I wake up, put water in it, and I go.
05:41You bend over the sink, and you .
05:43Put water in it and go.
05:45So a few months ago, I asked Colin to trim my hair.
05:49Because I was like, you know what?
05:49She's looking a little bit dead.
05:51And that led to my hair being chopped off.
06:02Colin?
06:03Yeah?
06:03You're just on my hair.
06:13To help my baldness, I got webbed-in hair extensions.
06:19I am now luscious Goldilocks, okay?
06:21I feel like I've just added life to my head.
06:28I was more relaxed at the salon, and so I wasn't ticking as much.
06:32But the next day, I was yanking on my weave.
06:36Goddamn!
06:38I was pulling on my hair extensions to the point where it was painful,
06:42because the webbed-in extensions is sewed into your head.
06:46I had them for a solid two weeks before I had to get them taken out.
06:51So you tease the hair.
06:59Now I'm trying to clip in extensions,
07:01which I hope don't set my ticks off as much,
07:03because I can take them out when I need.
07:06Get all that out of here.
07:17Rainy.
07:17Oh, oh, oh, oh, okay.
07:21All right, all right.
07:23Chase after the weenie.
07:26Doing Vaylin's hair and trying to put these hair clip-ins into her hair.
07:30It's a struggle.
07:31Yeah, it's a struggle.
07:33It's especially hard for me to sit still, getting my hair done, getting clip-ins.
07:37Just sitting still in general is not good.
07:41It's not good.
07:43It's not working.
07:46So no to the hair.
07:47This isn't working.
07:48We're saying no to the hair.
07:49Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
07:52Okay.
07:52Just add hair to the list of things that are more complicated when you have to wrap.
07:58I'm excited that we don't have to do this for another two hours and we can go and see our
08:02wedding venue.
08:03First question, do you guys allow alpacas?
08:06And no?
08:07Walk right out.
08:09Thank you, everybody.
08:09I know we've looked at a lot of wedding venues online.
08:25I can't make up my mind with what I want and what I like, but I mean, I'm not the biggest fan of indoor.
08:34Today we're going to look at an indoor wedding venue and I don't really know
08:38if I'm going to like it because like I want like scenery in the background while we get married.
08:44I think that we should be open to an indoor wedding venue because thunderstorms trigger
08:49Balen's anxiety and make her Tourette's worse.
08:58If it were to somehow thunderstorm on our wedding, it would just make it easier if everything's already indoors.
09:05One of them.
09:11Chuck's bald.
09:12It is actually.
09:12Okay, you baldlicious queen.
09:14Okay.
09:14You dumbass.
09:18State law bull.
09:19518 exit.
09:24Traffic, info, call.
09:26Weena, weena, weena.
09:28I'm losing my mind.
09:30Why am I on this side?
09:31I'm just going to start looking at this thing.
09:33Oh no, I'm sponsored by Joe Biden!
09:37Look down, look down.
09:40When I see road signs and I repeat them, it's because of my lexolalia.
09:45Lexolalia is a complex vocal tick that can also be associated with many other conditions,
09:51but also can be included in Tourette.
09:53I read something, then I vocalize it as a tick.
09:56So have you thought any more about the premarital counseling?
10:01I personally don't have a problem with trying the therapy.
10:05Yeah, it just makes me think that like your parents think our relationship isn't as good as it is.
10:11They brought up premarital therapy out of the love that they have for us.
10:17Yeah, but, okay.
10:19What?
10:20If someone gets involved in our relationship or marriage too much, where does, where does it end?
10:29There's got to be a line that's got to be drawn somewhere.
10:32Where does it end?
10:33Am I marrying Baylen or am I marrying Baylen, Julie and Alan?
10:38Are they going to be over every single day, involved in our household every single day,
10:44or are we going to be able to have our own marriage and family?
10:48I mean, I would love to have my parents over every day.
10:51I mean, I'm not even going to lie. Family is really, really important.
10:54Are you okay?
10:56What?
10:56You just said, I would love to have my parents over every single day.
11:00Is this what our marriage is going to be like?
11:09Are your tics okay?
11:09Yeah, I'm going to take my shoes off because you see how it's like around my ankle.
11:13When I hold my tics in at the venue, later on, they will all come out at once.
11:18I'm experiencing a dystonic tick in my foot and in my leg.
11:22So when my foot's locked, I'm twisting my ankle to the point where I want to snap my ankle off.
11:30Come on, Max.
11:36Oh, my God.
11:37This is actually our team mascot.
11:39The ticker.
11:40That's me.
11:41The ticker's here.
11:49You just said, I would love to have my parents over every single day.
11:52Is this what our marriage is going to be like?
11:59I know how close you and your parents are.
12:01Close, Dick.
12:03But you're becoming more independent.
12:06And do you think your parents being so involved is them not being able to fully let you go?
12:16I don't think they ever will.
12:21I do think that my parents hold on a little bit more because of my Tourette syndrome.
12:27It's going to be a constant juggling act throughout our relationship.
12:31I hear you.
12:34I do see where my parents are coming also with the premarital therapy because the relationship
12:41has worked out and they've taken it.
12:44Have your parents taken it?
12:45My parents did take it.
12:47They went through the church, but they did do something similar.
12:51So I talked to my mom about premarital counseling and she thinks that it would be good for us.
12:59However, I still am on the fence about everything.
13:02I mean, what if it opens up stuff that we just aren't ready to deal with?
13:07So, I mean, let's make the best of it and maybe it could end up being really helpful.
13:19Oh, that's it right there.
13:24It's so pretty.
13:28So, Crystal View is about 30 minutes away from where we live.
13:32At this point, we really don't know what we want versus what we don't want.
13:35We're really just kind of looking at all the options to figure that out.
13:42This is even better than the website.
13:44It's so pretty.
13:46You know how to work one of those?
13:50I'm going backwards into the revolving door because I don't want to
13:55touch it because of my OCD and having a fear of germs.
13:59I'll wear, like, long sleeves to purposely, like, touch things.
14:03Or you'll just wait 10 feet back and wait for me to open the door.
14:06Yeah, yeah.
14:07Oh, my gosh.
14:18This is pretty.
14:19Where do we even go?
14:20Oh, my first impression of the wedding venue when we walk in is breathtaking because of the
14:27stairs and the flowers and everything being white, but it's very echoey.
14:31And with my tics, it just makes me very insecure.
14:37Hey, Colin.
14:38Hey, Galen.
14:39How are you?
14:40It's nice to meet you.
14:41Nice to meet you, Amanda.
14:42How are you?
14:43Colin.
14:43Nice to meet you.
14:44Welcome to Crystal View.
14:45Lots of bling.
14:46Lots of bling.
14:46Lots of bling.
14:47Lots of glam.
14:48We love our chandeliers.
14:54I don't think we've had anybody get married here that's had Tourette's Syndrome,
14:58but we are aware of tics, and I think it's important with our knowledge to create an
15:04environment and an atmosphere that's comfortable for that individual, and that's what focused today.
15:10When did you guys get engaged?
15:12Last year.
15:12I love it.
15:13I love it.
15:13So you've had some time to think.
15:14Have you thought about colors, theme, anything for the big day?
15:18I love where it's very colorful and very bright, and I love oranges and pinks.
15:23She loves flowers.
15:23Yes, I love flowers.
15:25I'm obsessed with flowers.
15:26Perfect.
15:27I found a baby pink dress that I really, really liked.
15:30No.
15:31And I showed him, and he was like, no.
15:33So I was like, okay, well, I guess that's it.
15:35There's certain things that can have color, and then other things.
15:38And I listen.
15:38You're not showing up in a pink dress or a purple dress.
15:41Like, it's just not going to happen.
15:42But I listen.
15:43That's the thing.
15:44It's like, if he says, I don't really want to be in a pink talk, so I'll be like, okay,
15:48can we have a pink bow tie?
15:50So there's different ways that we incorporate it, but I don't really want the wedding.
15:56What?
15:57Love that.
15:57Fine, I'll stop talking.
16:01So the ceremony space is really a hop, jump, and a skip from your reception space.
16:06Welcome.
16:08Okay.
16:09I call it the Bridgerton room.
16:11No, I'm kidding.
16:12Pretty much.
16:14The vow exchange is typically in between the mirrors, and then theater-style seating on both
16:19sides of the column, and then the magic fills in all the gaps with the florals and the columns
16:23and all the beauty.
16:24Yeah, that's nice.
16:26This place is really fancy-smancy.
16:29It is very blingy.
16:30It is very blingy.
16:32Can we see the reception space?
16:33So let's head on that way.
16:35All right.
16:38You okay?
16:38I can definitely tell that Baylin's holding in her tics.
16:43I don't want her to go through that.
16:44I always want her to feel free and be herself.
16:47I still want to see the rest of the venue, but this does make me think that this might
16:51not be the right one for us.
16:52And here's the ballroom.
16:54Welcome to the grand ballroom.
16:57Oh, wow.
16:59This is massive.
17:00This is definitely grand.
17:03It's really nice.
17:04I like these chandeliers, too.
17:06I have a question.
17:07Yes.
17:07Have you guys ever had alpacas at a wedding?
17:10Absolutely.
17:10In the tent outside.
17:11Yes.
17:13The bride made the exact same face on that date.
17:17Have they been allowed inside?
17:18No.
17:19Colin, that's not a deal breaker.
17:20I told Colin, I said, deal breaker, no alpacas.
17:23We're having a white horse for an upcoming event.
17:26So we love animals here.
17:27We love animals here.
17:28We don't like horses.
17:28I'm petrified horses.
17:29Okay, okay, sorry.
17:30He's like, yeah.
17:32Let's get all the horses.
17:33Let's ride horses in here.
17:36Let's stick to alpacas for now.
17:36That would be sick wedding photos.
17:39Us on a horse?
17:40You love alpacas that love to kick people.
17:43I like horses.
17:44The one animal that I'm more than afraid of is a meaty horse.
17:48Like, your mom's a whore.
17:50Marlene's a dirty, filthy horse.
17:56Marlene's Colin's mom.
17:58I feel like I just heard Marlene and heard the word whore,
18:01and that's how we integrated.
18:03So we won't be going down to see her until the tick goes away,
18:07actually, because I will, I don't actually want to make eye contact with her when I say that.
18:11So thank you guys so much.
18:13Thank you so much.
18:15Lots to talk about.
18:16Have a great day.
18:17I think we go up this way.
18:21All right.
18:22How did you feel about everything?
18:23I feel like you already know what you want to say, so go ahead.
18:26Um, it's too glam for me.
18:29It was great that they allowed, like, the alpacas.
18:36Mm-hmm.
18:37But, like, I want, like, instead of, like, the place to be luxury,
18:41like, we make it look luxury, if that makes, like, any sense.
18:45I feel the same way.
18:46I think it's just a little bit too bougie for us.
18:49Boozy, bougie, dick.
18:51Boozy, bougie.
18:53Definitely crystal view.
18:55I can, I can see the name now.
18:57Yep.
18:57The crystal, really.
18:58Crystal math.
19:00Joe Biden does crystal math.
19:03Joe Biden and JB do crystal math together in my basement.
19:10That's a crazy combo.
19:13JB is the head of photography, and he is always in my peripheral vision.
19:18So that is where the tick comes from.
19:22Our director of photography right here doesn't do crystal math.
19:29Yeah.
19:30Nailed it.
19:33Whore.
19:34WH hockey sticks O-R-E.
19:37Ow.
19:38You okay?
19:47I'm gonna, I'm gonna take.
19:49Are your ticks okay?
19:49Yeah, I'm gonna take my shoes off,
19:51cuz you see how it's like around my ankle.
19:54When I hold my ticks in at the venue, it's incredibly painful.
19:58It's uncomfortable.
20:00And later on, they will all come out at once.
20:03I'm experiencing a dystonic tick in my foot and in my leg.
20:07It's basically like a locking and a twisting.
20:10So when my foot's locked, I'm twisting my ankle
20:14to the point where I want to snap my ankle off.
20:17Rainy.
20:20During the tour, did you hold your ticks?
20:22Maybe a little bit.
20:24Cuz I started ticking and it was like echoing and I was like, okay.
20:27My wedding day has been something that I've always dreamed of.
20:31And me holding in my ticks would look like a disaster.
20:36Your mom's a filthy, fat whore.
20:38I could have a tick attack in front of all my guests
20:42because it's pretty much bound to happen when I hold my ticks in.
20:49Between my Tourette's, I have Tourette syndrome, stupid,
20:52and my OCD, obsessive compulsive tick.
20:55I'm not like every other bride.
20:57So who knows what we have in store for us?
21:05Me and Colin just looked at our first wedding video.
21:09Phelan's my first kid getting married.
21:12And as a mom, I've poured my heart into her.
21:16So a little part of me feels like a tiny bit left out.
21:27I'm so excited.
21:44Come back.
21:48Have a good rest of your day.
21:51With my ticks, I don't drive.
21:53So today I took a rideshare from DC to Beckner's baseball game.
21:57It's his first game of the season.
21:59And I haven't been to one of his games in a long time
22:01because there's a lot of things that will set my ticks off.
22:04For example, I purposely missed the beginning of the game
22:07because the silence during the national anthem
22:10is a huge trigger for my ticks.
22:12I tend to just be cussing away.
22:15And everyone's just looking my way.
22:18So there's a rhyme for the day.
22:20Oh, my God. And all that rhymed.
22:25You, Kevin.
22:27Hey, baby.
22:28Hi.
22:29But these are parents with Beckner's team.
22:32All of those people know my mom.
22:33All of those people know that I have Tourette.
22:36So it's a safe space.
22:38And I'm here to support Beckner.
22:41How was your trip?
22:44You shopped the whole way here.
22:45You did what?
22:46I shopped the whole way here on my phone.
22:48Of course.
22:48Shocker.
22:49Becker.
22:49Yeah.
22:50Becky's playing shortstop.
22:52Hi, Becker!
22:55Oh, my gosh.
22:57Double deck zero.
22:59That's where he's playing.
23:00Is he a pink glove?
23:01Yeah.
23:02Yeah.
23:03Okay.
23:03Only Becks would pick out a pink glove.
23:04Yeah.
23:05He used to play center field, but now he's shortstop.
23:07We need to get him pink cleats, too.
23:08Mm-mm.
23:09No, he's fine.
23:14How would you describe Becker?
23:16Loud.
23:16Confident.
23:17He's a lot.
23:18Heard you guys talking about me.
23:20No.
23:20Make room.
23:25You're going in the middle?
23:26Okay.
23:26Make room.
23:27No.
23:28I heard you were saying something about my confidence.
23:31What's wrong with it?
23:32Nothing.
23:33Nothing is wrong with this.
23:34You love it.
23:38All right, Becks.
23:38Come on, Becks.
23:41Oh, Becks.
23:42Cheese.
23:42Becker, becker.
23:42Becker, becker.
23:44Okay.
23:45Got a little star in the fan.
23:47Yeah.
23:47Did it actually hit the fence?
23:49Did it?
23:49Yeah.
23:50Oh, my God.
23:55It means a lot to me to have been at my game because she hasn't been to one in like a year,
24:01so I've improved a lot. Like, I'm at top notch right now.
24:04So what's new with you? What have I been missing out on?
24:09Me and Colin just looked at our first wedding venue.
24:12It was beautiful. A little bit too bougie, too glam.
24:16Oh, my God.
24:17They had 260,000 crystals.
24:21Baylin's my first kid getting married. And as a mom, I've poured my heart into her.
24:29So a little part of me feels like a tiny bit left out.
24:34Another reason why it just really didn't work out was I held my tics in to the point when when I
24:40got out, my legs locked. And I don't know why I held them in other than the fact that I was like
24:47echoing through the whole place. Oh, like, well, that is that's like awkward, though,
24:53that you felt it necessary to be holding them in. Honestly, it wouldn't hurt to get back in
25:01to see Dana and talk to her about some of these concerns just to like readdress with her.
25:07Dana is Baylin's CBIT therapist. And CBIT is a technique that Baylin uses to manage her tics.
25:13When you have that urge to say an obscene word, breathe in through your mouth and out through your
25:18nose, that sensation will go away. It's just hard to like get there. I know that Baylin still
25:26meets with Dana virtually, but I also think it would be smart for her to plan an in-person session
25:31soon. That's a good idea. I'm going to schedule another appointment with Dana. Dana.
25:36So speaking of therapy, how are you feeling about premarital counseling?
25:41Well, me and Colin are going to do it. So, OK, it hasn't started, but I mean, I have high hopes
25:47about it. I feel this deep sense of relief that they're going to give premarital counseling a try.
25:53And I think that they'll be glad that they did it. Oh, it's all right. Way to hit the ball, guys.
26:01Beckner's team lost? Yep. They lost. I'm so glad that you ride-shared here and came to this. I know
26:07it's not easy. I have so much fun. I know it means a ton to Beckner to have Baylin at his game. The two
26:13of them are a lot alike with their anxiety and then certain behaviors that Beckner is starting to
26:19exhibit. Thank God he has baseball right now because I think baseball really keeps his mind in a place
26:25where he can put some of that on the back burner. Come on, boo. You did so good.
26:33You seem to almost hit it out. Yeah, we did. And I love your pink glove.
26:37I know, right? Did you, like, hear her?
26:40Yeah. You did? I heard her before I saw her. You heard her before I saw her? Of course. That's our baby.
26:49This is actually our team mascot. The ticker. That's me. The ticker's here.
26:54We should change our name. Look at my birdie. What mascot would I even be?
27:02Uh, a mockingbird. Ooh, I'd be, I'd be a parrot. I'd be a parrot.
27:09Do you still want to play baseball over now? Yeah, I'm getting drafted out of middle school.
27:13One million dollar deal. No. If I ever make it, that's gonna be like 90 million.
27:18Okay, yeah. Maybe if we make it to the car. Yeah. We can make the 90 million happen. Get out of here.
27:27Only 90? That's not a lot of money. Max, you're, you're so full of yourself. I love you though.
27:35Do you have anxiety about therapy today? I have a little bit of anxiety. Therapy for the first time.
27:40Baylen and I are headed to premarital couples counseling. We're going in there completely blind.
27:46So it's really hard for you to express your emotions. Does it feel kind of overwhelming?
27:51Yeah. Yeah.
28:10What the heck, too? Oh.
28:12What the heck? You guys gotta clean up your toys. Dana's gonna trip over your toys.
28:19I'm taking my mom's advice and I'm meeting with my CBIT therapist today.
28:22I haven't seen Dana in a while because of the engagement, moving.
28:27Some things that help manage my tics other than CBIT are having headphones on or listening to music.
28:34Being around my dogs. However, with my wedding coming up and not wanting to say certain tics,
28:43it's so important that I meet with her to get the right tools to not have those tics happen.
28:50How are you? How are you? How are you? How are you? I'm so good. How are you? I'm good.
28:59My name is Dana Wachter. I'm a registered nurse certified in CBIT therapy. CBIT is an acronym for
29:04Comprehensive Behavioral Intervention for Tics. So I love your apartment. It's beautiful. Thank you.
29:11Thank you. Do you want to do a walkthrough? That's your flair. I would love to. Okay, sweet.
29:14Okay. We have the bar stools because the backs of the chairs set my tics off to lean my head back.
29:22So instead of having anything there, it helps because I can hold on to the things. The stove top is
29:27electric, but I also learned that I need a stove cover because I don't want to break the stove top.
29:36Right. We also have plastic everything. Tick proof. Seeing Baylin's progress, I am so proud because
29:45I always reflect back to our first meeting. She was in tears. She couldn't control her tics. She was
29:50ashamed by them. So she's come such a long way. It's so rewarding to see. So what did you want to work
29:56on today? I would like to work on dick. My, yeah, my god damn. On your god damn. Yes, absolutely. I've had my
30:14tick for a long time, but I don't really know what set it off. It's either from a movie or something that
30:22someone said, but I definitely don't want to say it on my wedding day, so. So typically we would
30:29recommend using a competing response whenever an urge comes on. We'll review your reverse breathing
30:37when you breathe in through your mouth and you hold it and then you breathe out through your nose. And
30:42the reason why you're reverse breathing is you're fighting with speaking. By breathing in through your
30:48mouth, it makes it impossible. How do you feel? I didn't need to say my ticket. Beautiful. Now,
31:03sometimes what happens is if you're speaking and you feel an urge to have a vocalization,
31:10to stop and do a competing response interrupts the natural flow of speech, right? So it's okay to do
31:17a less intense version of the tick, such as whispering the tick. Like I can do it without
31:23saying it, but just make like. Exactly. Or you can camouflage it as a yawn if you want. That's awesome.
31:30I never thought about that. Yeah. I practice my SIPA exercises pretty much every day, but it's a lot to do
31:39deep breathing or masking for every tick. And there will be times where I do hold in my ticks when I
31:49feel uncomfortable. So me and Colin went to look at a wedding venue. It was completely indoor and I was
31:55just echoing. And I also did suppress to the point where when we left the wedding tour, my legs were locked
32:02up from like motor ticks. Yeah. From almost like holding in all my vocal. From hearing the echoing.
32:09Remember, we also want to eliminate triggers. Maybe go look at venues that are outdoors. Mm-hmm.
32:14So you won't have that feeling of, you know. Being trapped almost. Yeah. It's like a claustrophobic
32:19maybe type feeling. Yes. Where that would be eliminated if you were outdoors. I'm excited to look into that.
32:24And remember, you have your C-BIT therapy in your back pocket. Yes. You can use those competing responses as you
32:32see fit. Whatever feels comfortable for you at the time. Yeah. Thank you for coming all this way.
32:38You're welcome. Thank you so much. You've come so far. I want you to focus on that. You live on your own
32:43now. Yay. That was big for you. So I'm so proud of you. Keep up the good work.
32:49Sometimes the C-BIT sessions with Dana can be difficult if my ticks are bad. Today's went well,
32:54but I would like to do more as the wedding gets closer so I can be the best version of myself on my big day.
33:02Hey. How are you? I'm good. Oh, how was work? It was good.
33:27I just got off work and Balin and I are headed to premarital couples counseling.
33:31Yay. I'm going from one therapy session to the next. I have my C-BIT session with Dana today.
33:40How'd that go? It went well. One thing that Dana reminded me of
33:44is that C-BIT is all about removing triggers. And remember when we went to the wedding venue,
33:51it was kind of like setting my ticks off or making me feel like I had to suppress in a way.
33:55Mm-hmm. Now that we know that it's a trigger, I would just not like to see any more indoor venues.
34:03Yeah, no, I get it. I think an outdoor venue would probably fit.
34:08Finding the perfect wedding venue is like a moving target. Trying to avoid the triggers of thunderstorms.
34:16I have a gun. By looking at an indoor wedding venue only created more triggers that we were unaware of.
34:23So I know that we both filled out the assessment form. What do you think is going to be something that we
34:32should probably focus on? There are so many questions. Do you mind, do you remember them?
34:37I know the questions. There's a lot. So the therapist sent over an assessment for us to complete before
34:43we got there. There was a lot of questions. There was like a hundred questions. I know there was a lot
34:47of sex questions. Okay. There was. I remember. That's the only thing I remember. I don't know how
34:54they were worded. I just remember it was like one after the other. Literally. Literally. Kind of both.
35:02Both. Kind of both. Does your partner not please you? Or like, do you not please your partner? Is there
35:09ever times that one person's more pleased than the other and you're upset? Or just like any type of
35:17specific question like that was on there. Is that an issue with you guys?
35:24No. Why'd you say it like that? Because I'm nervous. I don't like talking about it.
35:32This guy can a whole bag of .
35:41Suck a whole bag of . Colin. Sorry.
35:46Suck a whole bag of . Suck a whole bag of . And that's how tics start, ladies and gentlemen,
35:53right there. Right there. Right there. Suck a whole bag of . Sorry.
35:58Suck a whole bag of . Suck a whole bag of .
36:02I know you're watching. Suck a whole bag of . Just don't say anything else. Suck a whole bag of .
36:11Suck a whole bag of . Suck a whole bag of . Suck a whole bag of . I got it.
36:22therapy for the first time no okay good for you i'm super nervous right now all right we're here
36:32let the therapy begin alan's bald we're going in there completely blind like we have no idea
36:52hello hi your room is so nice thank you it's nice to meet you hi colin are you nice to meet you
37:10sit wherever you'd like my name is amy becknall i am a licensed professional counselor i've been
37:16practicing for the last 11 years specializing with couples for the last eight years how does it feel
37:22to be here today i was a little nervous before getting here just therapy scares me okay my parents
37:30came to him and i and said that they did premarital counseling basically kind of as like an avenue to
37:37grow the relationship together so anyway to just make our marriage as strong as possible yeah that's
37:44a really good motivator bitch i've never had a client with tourette syndrome what i know about
37:52tourette syndrome is that it is a neurological disorder so balen and colin might have a little
37:58more of a challenge than your typical couple but i'm really grateful for the opportunity to sit and
38:05establish a safe space for balen and colin to be able to open up so that they can share really
38:11vulnerable pieces of their relationship so before you came here today i sent you an assessment to
38:19complete a premarital assessment that was able to highlight your strengths as well as some growth
38:25areas and i'm just curious what were some areas of strength that really popped out for you do you
38:31recall and it's definitely not communication definitely not communication it's definitely not
38:35communication okay you seem pretty confident in that yes because i'm very bad at communicating okay
38:41tell me more like everything like everything like me like i don't know how to like express my feelings
38:48and then i also struggle with like everything to do with vocally like everything so does it feel kind of
38:55overwhelming yeah okay yeah it's stressful how frequently do you feel like everyone okay like every
39:05day yeah just don't get myself it's fine yeah is this bringing up some emotion for you yeah okay yeah
39:18i mean i was on board for therapy of course i was but i wasn't expecting to be in a puddle of tears in
39:23five minutes but i guess that's what therapists are for is to actually say something how about you colin
39:30did anything come up for you that you thought would be important to bring up together um
39:41i think i don't know like i guess like
39:44i've been holding on to something for a while now and it's not easy to say out loud because i know
39:54it's going to affect balen it's something that's been a burden and i can't keep pretending that it's not
40:00i am having a girl's night
40:16girls night with the twist twist that dick around wrap it slap it tap it that dick holy
40:23i look like beckner this is the first time that i've had a solid tight group of girlfriends
40:30it's great
40:33here soon i have to make like a career decision
40:37that is a super heavy burden that i guess i could say that i have so what's colin's plan after he gets
40:45out of the military he doesn't obviously know because he knows you can't work a normal job
40:49i think there's some tension between my siblings and colin because my siblings are very very
40:55protective of me
40:59valen i want to show you something that's that we got outside okay my dad's been bugging me to come
41:05by the house to see something and i have no idea what it is what he doing yeah what are we doing
41:14tell us that funny no i'm being serious
41:19so
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