Baylen Out Loud - Season 2 Episode 04- Anxiety on High Alert
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00:00Who?
00:01Shohei Otani.
00:02In my eyes, you know?
00:03Sorry, Shohei Otani.
00:04I'm Shohei Otani.
00:05Your mom's a hoe.
00:06Marlene's a dirty, fat, filthy, horny whore.
00:11Hopefully she doesn't see it.
00:15She definitely will.
00:18I feel like I'm being pulled.
00:21Almost.
00:22Between what?
00:23Like, family members and friends, and especially your dad.
00:28To, like, choose a career path that's secured financially.
00:32I didn't know that he was this overwhelmed.
00:36It breaks my heart that he's been keeping this in.
00:40We need to find ways to be able to save money.
00:44We can start cutting by you not shopping as much.
00:50We can start cooking more meals here.
00:53The more we talk about it, the more I realize this isn't going to be easy.
00:57You little bitch.
00:58Yep.
01:00What are we doing?
01:02I've been working on a surprise I want to share with the family, but especially Balen.
01:07Let's have the wedding here in the backyard.
01:11I don't think my parents' backyard is Colin's first wedding venue choice.
01:17And honestly, I'm a little afraid to ask.
01:24I want to party tonight.
01:37Merry Weenies.
01:38I want to party tonight.
01:39Merry Weenies.
01:40I want to party tonight.
01:41Merry Weenies.
01:42Merry Weenies.
01:43Merry Weenies.
01:45Hey, guys.
01:46Hey, babe.
01:47Smells good in here.
01:48How was work?
01:49Work was good, long, but I'm here.
01:54What are you making?
01:55Wanted up.
01:56Cooking up a home cooked meal.
01:59After Colin opened up in couples therapy about how stressed he's been with money,
02:04I thought that it would be a good idea to start not eating out as much so I'm cooking more.
02:10The stove is still a danger to me because I can still easily burn myself, so I'm trying out safer options like a slow cooker.
02:18I'm doing some pulled chicken motions right now.
02:21I did have to spend a little bit of money.
02:24I have some pretty cool kitchen gadgets that help me with shredding and cutting so I don't have to use sharp objects.
02:30It's a tick-proof tool.
02:32And then I made mac and cheese, which probably needs to be stirred.
02:37Whoa.
02:38It's not warm because I had to start it off.
02:41It's okay.
02:42It looks good.
02:44I'm a little nervous.
02:45My parents are coming to join us.
02:47The last time I saw my dad, he pitched the backyard as a wedding venue.
02:51It's hard for me to have serious conversations because I don't like confrontation, so I haven't even told Colin yet.
02:58That's exactly why I invited my parents to dinner.
03:01That's 100% my dad's job.
03:03Hi.
03:04Hi.
03:05Hi.
03:06Hi.
03:07Come on.
03:08Come on.
03:09Come on.
03:10Hi.
03:11Come in.
03:12Wow.
03:13It smells really good.
03:14Thanks.
03:15I've been cooking all day.
03:16Yeah.
03:17I've spread it a whole block of cheese with a cheese hand grater that you get from the nail salon.
03:22Yeah.
03:23Yeah.
03:29Bitch.
03:30Then it started setting off my dystonic tics.
03:34So then I got really worried that I wouldn't like be able to finish.
03:37So I put country music on my headphones so it helped soothe my tics.
03:42So I was able to do all of it.
03:44Yeah.
03:45And I made a salad.
03:46I made a salad.
03:47We know how much effort it takes for Balin just to cook a dish, let alone an entire meal.
03:58So we were happily surprised by the random dinner invite.
04:03You're killing me.
04:04You got to tell me what this whole thing is about.
04:07Yeah.
04:08This was quite a little last minute surprise.
04:10Yeah.
04:11Special meal at the Dupree Dooley house.
04:14Well, I knew we had some things to talk about.
04:17Oh, the chicken's good.
04:19Yeah.
04:20So what's the latest with wedding planning?
04:23Have you guys looked at venues?
04:26Balin, have you thought about?
04:29Have you told Colin?
04:30No.
04:31What better time to do that than now?
04:34Yeah.
04:35Are you kidding me?
04:37Tell me what.
04:39Colin.
04:40Wait.
04:41Hold on, Colin.
04:42Here, Colin.
04:43You might want to sit down.
04:46Okay.
04:47So?
04:48When I went to go, you know, barbecue with the family, we had a very nice discussion
04:55of a layout in the backyard for our wedding.
05:00Mm-hmm.
05:01Mm-hmm.
05:02Like having our wedding in my parents' backyard.
05:05That was the Al.
05:06How do you feel about that?
05:08That was the Al suggestion.
05:10Having our wedding.
05:13Our wedding in the backyard.
05:14You picture it.
05:15You open up the door and you see me walking down the stairs.
05:18I really don't have words.
05:22I'm really just trying to wrap my head around it all.
05:25Like, I wouldn't really picture our wedding being there.
05:29I mean, there's a lot of bugs.
05:31There's also a lot of dog poop in the yard.
05:34I just offered it out there because I know if she needed an emotional break due to overstimulation,
05:42ticks, she could have her emotional break in the house.
05:46That's all I wanted to offer and that's all it is.
05:49I mean, listen, Baylin, I am warming up to the idea of certain aspects of it only because
05:58I know that your struggles are real.
06:01Mm-hmm.
06:02And I know finances mean a lot to you.
06:06Okay.
06:07Scumbag.
06:08Yeah.
06:09This is kind of like a tricky situation.
06:11I really am concerned about the expenses kind of getting out of hand for the wedding.
06:16So, I don't want to ignore a way for us to save money.
06:20But, on the other hand, Baylin has really been working really hard to be more independent.
06:26Having this wedding in her parents' backyard would be kind of like pushing her back into the fold.
06:32Yeah, I mean, I think it really just comes down to what we can find.
06:36Mm-hmm.
06:37Right?
06:38Like, if we can't really find anything within our budget.
06:40But that's all.
06:41It's all.
06:42You got options, man.
06:43Yeah.
06:44Definitely.
06:45It doesn't hurt to have options.
06:46Yes.
06:47Yeah.
06:48It's good to have options.
06:49You could have told me yourself, you know?
06:51I mean, I know, but I just still don't know how I feel about it, so.
06:55All right.
06:56We're out of here.
06:57Everything was so good.
06:59Plus, I really don't want to hurt my dad's feelings.
07:02He put dick.
07:03A lot of thought into this.
07:05Dick.
07:06All right.
07:07I love you.
07:08Thanks, Bay.
07:09The big question is, are we able to make everyone happy, including ourselves?
07:14Yeah.
07:15So, right now, we'll keep the backyard option on the table.
07:20Just tap it in.
07:21Just tap.
07:22Oh, it's good.
07:23That's a great restart for me.
07:25Oh, that's stroke three.
07:27We're doing mini golf because we've got a pro golfer over here.
07:28I just started pulling in.
07:30But I am competitive.
07:31I am competitive.
07:32I'm in the water.
07:33I'm in the water.
07:34You pulled it.
07:35You pulled it.
07:36No redoes.
07:37No redoes.
07:38Play it where it lies.
07:39So we're not in the water.
07:40It's so weird.
07:41That's not going to be a good start for me.
07:42Oh, that's stroke three.
07:43We needed a mini break from wedding planning.
07:45Yeah.
07:46And what's more mini than mini golf?
07:48It's all nips.
07:49It's all nips.
07:50It's all nips.
07:51We're doing mini golf because we've got a pro golfer over here.
07:54I just started pulling in.
07:56But I am competitive.
07:58I'm in the water.
08:01You pulled it.
08:04No redoes.
08:05Play it where it lies.
08:07Sweet.
08:08That was a good shot.
08:09Two.
08:10Thanks.
08:11Seven to three.
08:12Six to three, sir.
08:17Because of my dicks.
08:24I do have to face a few obstacles that require a lot of stopping and going.
08:29Colin, I lost my ball.
08:31I know.
08:32I'm not fishing for it either.
08:34Eat a bag of dicks.
08:36Let's go get you a new ball.
08:38One minute.
08:39Someone's calling me.
08:41Hey, Mom.
08:42Hi, baby.
08:43How are you?
08:44What are you doing?
08:45Little mini golf date.
08:46Me and Colin.
08:47Oh, my gosh.
08:48That sounds like so much fun.
08:49It honestly is.
08:50I'm beating him.
08:51Oh, my gosh.
08:52He's probably losing his mind.
08:54Well, I won't keep you too long.
08:56But, Beckner, I would like to have, like, a sleepover, like a hangout with you for the
09:01weekend.
09:02Okay.
09:03And he brought it up.
09:04He wants to?
09:05Of course he does.
09:06Yeah.
09:07I'm surprised that Beckner requested to have a sleepover with me because, like
09:12me, he suffers from anxiety.
09:15Since moving outside of the house, I don't really know how bad Beckner's anxiety has been.
09:19But I do know it prevents him from doing a lot of things.
09:22I mean, I wasn't really surprised when he brought it up because, like, he misses his
09:27sisters.
09:28Like, the boys are a lot sometimes.
09:30He's a lot.
09:31But he obviously knows what he wants.
09:33Okay.
09:34I'm definitely thrilled.
09:36I would be thrilled to host Beckner.
09:38I honestly would.
09:39I'm a little, like, nervous.
09:41I've never hosted a kid before.
09:42I'm sure it'll be fine.
09:44Colin, would you care if Beckner spent the night for the weekend?
09:47This weekend?
09:48Yeah.
09:49I have golf plans this weekend, so I don't know how much I would be around.
09:54Okay.
09:55It'll be fine, though.
09:57Yeah.
09:58Take a dick.
09:59Things just got way more complicated.
10:04I'm supposed to do this by myself.
10:07When I get overwhelmed, my tics act up.
10:10But I love Beckner, and I want to be able to spend some time with him.
10:15I know it's a little daunting.
10:17I just think it's good for you.
10:19It's good for him.
10:21We're testing our limits.
10:23Okay.
10:24It'll be a fun little weekend.
10:26He's a handful.
10:28Yeah.
10:29I know.
10:30He's an actual handful.
10:31Mom, he's eight handfuls.
10:32Yup.
10:33So you better be ready.
10:34Okay, bye.
10:36I have no idea what to expect.
10:38This is going to be interesting.
10:43Hola!
10:44Como está?
10:45Muy bien!
10:46You guys ready for this damn sleepover?
10:49It's okay.
10:51It's okay.
10:53Do you think that there's any part of this where you're still just trying to hold on to Balan?
11:00I haven't shared this story with that many people.
11:03It's just, you know, when I went to pick her up and when I talked with her.
11:08Oh my gosh, we're not talking about this again.
11:16Maybe I was the same as you when I was 15.
11:19Except back then I still had big dreams.
11:23Always listen to the others.
11:24Now my eardrums bleed from the noise inside my head.
11:28Joe Biden.
11:32Joe is a young kid that I met at a Tourette's event a couple years ago.
11:36He has Tourette's syndrome.
11:38We stayed in touch through social media.
11:40And that's when I kind of got inspired by who he really is.
11:46Hi!
11:47Can you see me?
11:49Yeah, I can see you.
11:50Okay, sweet.
11:51How are you?
11:52I'm good.
11:53How are you?
11:54I'm good.
11:55Joe Biden.
11:57Where did that tick come from?
11:59Remember when the election was going on?
12:02I watched a solid three minutes of the total debate.
12:06Joe Biden's buried in my backyard after storing cocaine off of a zebra during the Revolutionary War of 812.
12:11And it's come back.
12:14But yeah, I got it from watching the debate.
12:17Anyways, how are you doing?
12:19How is college?
12:21LSU is really cool.
12:23I'm actually taking summer classes now.
12:26Oh, yeah.
12:27That's another thing about Joe.
12:29He's 12.
12:30And in college.
12:31Obviously, like, people in my class is like six foot, like, plays football.
12:37And I'm just sitting there with my voice like this.
12:40It's hard to make friends.
12:42What are you studying in?
12:43Uh, sports management.
12:45I just really like basketball.
12:46Mm-hmm.
12:47Are you good at it?
12:48Yeah.
12:49You sound like my brother Beckner.
12:51He is so cocky.
12:53You're like, yeah, I'm the .
12:56Joe reminds me a lot of my brother Beckner because they both like sports.
13:00They're both around the same age.
13:02They're both outdoorsy.
13:03They're both hands-on.
13:05They're both, in a way, mature, well beyond their ears.
13:12So, how have you been feeling physically lately?
13:14I'm doing good.
13:15Hmm.
13:16Woo-hoo.
13:17Woo-hoo.
13:18I feel like chatting helps my tics a lot because it distracts me from my tics.
13:22I know specifically that I suffer with very, very bad OCD and anxiety, and I have ADHD traits.
13:30Do you know what type of co-occurring conditions, like, you specifically have with your Tourette?
13:35OCD and anxiety, definitely.
13:37Tourette syndrome manifests itself differently in everybody.
13:42Joe has verbal and motor tics because he has Tourette syndrome, and you have to have both to have Tourette syndrome.
13:50Today, I can't assume that he's not tics because he probably is tics but underneath the table.
13:57We just can't tell.
13:58Joe, what's the hardest thing about making friends your age?
14:03Kids always make fun of me.
14:04Mm-hmm.
14:05On my way to summer camp, I got jumped on the bus because I was tics.
14:09I was, like, yelling and cursing, and I was blinking my eyes, and I broke my nose and had a concussion.
14:16Um, so it was rough, but I managed to pull through it.
14:20Joe ****** Biden.
14:22****** man.
14:25I'm very sorry that that happened.
14:27I mean, it's terrible.
14:31Yeah.
14:33When I hear that Joe got jumped on the school bus, Joe ****** Biden, it's disheartening.
14:40I was also bullied in high school.
14:43I've been recorded throughout stores.
14:46I mean, I get recorded everywhere I go, and people think that it's okay, but that's also bullying.
14:53Unfortunately, I know what it feels like, but I also want you to know that, like, you're so loved.
14:59Yeah, and you are loved, too, by the way.
15:02So, you too.
15:03Thanks.
15:04Thanks, Joe.
15:05I love to help others with Tourette's when I can because I know what it's like to hate yourself because of a condition that you have no control over.
15:18And I don't want anyone to feel that, ever.
15:21Gosh, it was so lovely to talk to you, Joe ****** Biden.
15:25I'm Joe.
15:26Yeah, me too.
15:28Bye.
15:29I'm Joe ****** Biden.
15:31Hearing Joe talk really makes me think about Beckner and the way that kids are when you're younger.
15:42The more I think about it, I want to get those two boys together when Beckner's here.
15:47I have a feeling it'll be good for them, me, everybody.
16:08My mom and Beckner should be here any minute, so you have to make sure that everything's perfect.
16:11Okay.
16:12How are you feeling about it?
16:14I'm fine.
16:15I'm a little nervous on how to host a kid, but it's fine.
16:18I mean, I'm just anxious to host somebody and then be in charge of that person.
16:23Like, but it's like a whole...
16:24Yeah, but it's not like he's a two-year-old.
16:26Like, it's not like we have to sit there and wipe his butt on the toilet.
16:29Listen.
16:30Listen, let me tell you if we did.
16:33Hola, ¿cómo estás? Muy bien, ¿y tú?
16:37Muy bien.
16:39What?
16:40What's up, guys?
16:43How you doing?
16:44Good.
16:45How you doing, man?
16:46Good.
16:47You guys ready for this damn sleepover?
16:49What's up, y'all?
16:50What's up?
16:51It's okay?
16:53I'm about to get real.
16:56Fill me in on, like, the lowdown of everything, because I really can't stay long.
17:01I have things to make ice cream sundaes, games we can play.
17:04I have things to bedazzle.
17:06Beckner will love to bedazzle.
17:08Have you ever bedazzled anything?
17:09I don't even know what bedazzles... bedazzles is.
17:12Okay.
17:15I know Baylen does have some nervous jitters about hosting Beckner this weekend for the first time ever.
17:20Okay, bye, guys.
17:21Bye.
17:22Love you.
17:23Get home safe.
17:24But I also know that she's come so far just with her independence and knowing who she is
17:30and what her boundaries are in her life in regards to what she can and can't do.
17:36So this is, I mean, this is groundbreaking, honestly.
17:40It makes my mama heart really proud of her.
17:43Okay, I'm gonna show you how to bedazzle.
17:46I'm gonna take this, and it goes in the wax.
17:48Well, before y'all get started, bedazzle some stuff.
17:52Bedazzle.
17:53I'm gonna go ahead and head out and go golfing, all right?
17:55Okay.
17:56Love you.
17:57I love you.
17:58I had already made plans to go golfing before Baylen scheduled this sleepover with Beckner,
18:02but things are off to a really smooth start, so I feel a lot more comfortable leaving.
18:08I have the brown ones that go over here for B.
18:11Plus, now, Baylen and Beckner can have a little one-on-one time.
18:16So?
18:17Wait, I could color them.
18:19No.
18:20No.
18:21Is something burning?
18:24Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa.
18:26What's over there burning?
18:28Yo, what's burning?
18:31What?
18:32Why is this burning?
18:36What?
18:37Something's burning.
18:38When I start seeing smoke come out of the stove topper, I'm very much confused.
18:47I'm...
18:48I'm...
18:49I can't go over there.
18:50I mean, one of the knobs was on, somebody must have bumped it or something.
18:58My instinct is probably run to the shower and turn it on.
19:13What is the shower going to do for us in the kitchen?
19:17Because if you're burning, just sit in the shower.
19:20It's running water.
19:21We're not burning.
19:22The stove top is.
19:24Okay.
19:25It's not smoking anymore.
19:26Nothing is going on.
19:27Let's move away from there.
19:28Just be careful when walking by.
19:29This is the exact kind of thing that can push me over the edge.
19:41So I'm very proud that I was able to stay calm.
19:45But now my anxiety is definitely on high layer.
19:50I don't know.
19:52This has never happened.
20:01I can't believe this is our first real do-something date in a century.
20:0530 years?
20:0620 years?
20:07I don't know.
20:09Uh...
20:10I think...
20:12I think it's...
20:13This is what leads to more kids, but...
20:15What did you just say?
20:17Beckner's out of the house for the weekend, so Julie and I thought we'd go out too.
20:21And we haven't had a date night in 25 years because it's been kids and diapers and lack of babysitters.
20:29It's pretty important, I think, in this moment and time for us to still spend time with each other
20:36and kind of rekindle why we are together.
20:40Hi.
20:41Hello.
20:42We're here.
20:43Welcome, Al.
20:44Okay.
20:45How you doing?
20:46Al.
20:47Nice to meet you.
20:48Hi, Al.
20:49I'm April.
20:50So nice to meet you.
20:51Welcome, welcome.
20:52I was like, we could do pottery or bowling, quick dance lesson.
20:53And Al was all about...
20:54He's like, yeah, let's do pottery.
20:56Then I booked the dance lesson.
20:59Gentle.
21:01Practice.
21:02Go five, six, seven, eight, and one, two, three, four, five, six...
21:09What are you doing?
21:10One, two, one...
21:12You're not leading, you're not touching your feet.
21:14You're not touching your feet.
21:15We're gonna take a time out in a second.
21:16How do we feel?
21:17Can I switch partners?
21:19Yeah, I'm all...
21:21Like, this is...
21:23Like, here.
21:24Let's get the underhooks on this.
21:26Okay.
21:27Julie and I usually have fun no matter what we do.
21:32We met at my cousin's wedding when she was a waitress there.
21:35I was 28, 29 years old, and Julie was 18, 19, and...
21:39We were the perfect gift for each other at that moment in time.
21:45An accident happened after we got engaged.
21:48It wasn't an accident.
21:49It was...
21:50And I got pregnant with baby Berkey.
21:52And we had already started the planning...
21:55There was no preventative actions anywhere at all.
21:59We had started the planning changes of the wedding.
22:04You can plan on...
22:05Yes.
22:06We wanted to make sure his birth was legitimate,
22:08so we got married at the courthouse before he was born.
22:11And then we had another wedding seven months later,
22:14so I could actually wear the dress.
22:16And, of course, we had baby Berkey with us.
22:19Three or four children is kind of what we both agreed upon.
22:23Yes.
22:24Somehow we garnered up some extra stamina.
22:27What are we doing?
22:28You're just trying to grind my leg.
22:30I'm not trying to grind anything.
22:31If I was, it wouldn't be your leg.
22:33Right?
22:36The one thing I believe that helps make our relationship work
22:40is the fact that we admire each other.
22:42And that truly enhances our commitment to each other.
22:50All right.
22:51Thank you, guys.
22:52Yay.
22:53Very, very welcome.
22:54Let's go check my phone.
22:55Yeah.
22:56Yeah, yeah, yeah.
22:57It's nice that we've taken this time for each other,
22:59but the kids are always on our minds.
23:02Truly, that's the first thing I think about when we're done on the dance floor
23:05is checking to make sure that Beckner is okay and things are going smooth.
23:10He hasn't called yet, and she hasn't called.
23:12No news is good news, so I'm all about it.
23:15So...
23:17Do you think Beckner's grilling her over the wedding,
23:20or where are they going to have it?
23:21Are they going to have it at the house?
23:22Oh, gosh. No, Beckner doesn't.
23:24Yeah.
23:25He's so excited about wanting to have it at the house.
23:28I literally think he doesn't even care about the wedding.
23:30He just wants people to play wiffle ball.
23:31No, I think he's the first person you've definitely convinced.
23:34You have one person on your team.
23:36Al is still really championing this idea of the wedding in the backyard.
23:41It's such a comfortable, safe space, so there's, like, this logical side to it.
23:46And then I also think that Al is stuck, just hanging on to all the pieces of her life.
23:54Do you think that there's any part of this where you're still just trying to hold on to Balin?
24:00I don't mean in a negative way. She's your girl.
24:04Mmm.
24:06It's really about that I do everything that I could to make sure, like, her day was amazing.
24:20It's just, you know, when I went to pick her up and when I talked about her...
24:25Oh, my gosh. We're not talking about this again.
24:28I haven't shared this story with that many people.
24:32Four years ago, Balin was in college.
24:35We had kind of talked her into going.
24:39Calls. She's manic.
24:42I get to there. It's a three-plus hour drive.
24:45And then when I went in there, she was just curled up on the bed with her dog.
24:51And she was like, I'm such a burden. I'm such a burden. I can't...
24:55I'm like, you're not a burden. Stop talking like that.
24:57I gave her a big hug and I'm like, you're gonna be fine.
24:59And she's like, I'm not gonna be fine. I'm not doing good.
25:03And I was like, well, you can't talk like this because it's worrisome.
25:09And I just asked her for my own well-being.
25:16Like, hey, like you're not thinking about like doing something bad.
25:21Like you're not thinking about killing yourself, are you?
25:25And she's like this far away hugging me.
25:27And she just turned and looked at me and she's like this close.
25:30She's like, that's all I've thought about for four days is how can I just jump off this roof?
25:38And I was like, never thought that reaction.
25:43I just never knew what to say.
25:44I just didn't know.
25:45Like, all I kept doing was just hugging her and like telling her like, you don't even know what like tomorrow is gonna be.
25:55Like you don't, you haven't, you haven't even lived your best day.
26:00You don't, you haven't held your own baby.
26:02You haven't like gotten married.
26:03You, you don't know what it's like to, to experience like true love.
26:10Like somebody who'll do anything for you.
26:12Thinking back at that day, I was really just trying to give her hope.
26:21And now what I had said actually, it's coming to fruition, like it's here.
26:27I just don't want her to be in a place where it's, it's an emotional wreck bar.
26:36And all she ever remembers about her wedding is.
26:41Not enjoying her day.
26:42Yeah.
26:43This is it.
26:44So it matters big time.
26:45It matters to me big time.
26:46Big time.
26:47I gotta make sure it's good.
26:49That's all.
26:50That's all.
26:53Al is holding on to some of his pain from the past in regards to Vaylin.
26:59I can't relate as deeply because I, I didn't live in that moment, that deep, dark moment that he experienced.
27:05With her, that I can understand because I want to protect her too.
27:11So I think that that's why this idea of a backyard wedding is so important to him.
27:18Don't put too much pressure on yourself.
27:20You've already done everything.
27:23You've already been the best dad ever.
27:25And we're going to make sure that she has the best, most comfortable day accommodating to her.
27:34And of course, Colin is part of this too.
27:38But Colin, Colin does a great job with taking the backseat.
27:42He does a good job.
27:43He's happy to be sacrificial and take the backseat because he knows that her needs come before his in a lot of ways.
27:49And that is, uh, that makes him a great human.
27:53Just don't feel heartbroken if this is not the avenue they pick.
27:58And I'm sure she'll still let her dad have some input.
28:02All right.
28:03She will.
28:04One of the traits that I admire most about Alan is just how deeply and unconditionally he cares about our children.
28:17I've always said that it's going to be and it is harder for Al to let go.
28:24Have you decided where you're having your wedding at?
28:30We're still looking.
28:31Well, there's always an open option.
28:33The backyard.
28:34In the backyard?
28:36Yeah.
28:37I know exactly who put Beckner up to this.
28:40Thank you, Alan.
28:42My dad is bald.
28:44Oh, I'm drooping them over the sides.
28:58Dirty martini style?
29:00Mm-hmm.
29:01It's fine.
29:02So after the fire's been kaput, I'm pretty confident now that me and Beckner can get back to what we're doing.
29:11We're going to have a good night and not tell mom till the morning.
29:19My stomach's already hurting.
29:22I feel like at the end of this, I'm going to have diabetes.
29:26I mean, God.
29:28Please stop.
29:29When my dad found out that I was having a sleepover at Vane Collins' apartment, he gave me a little task.
29:41Have you decided where you're having your wedding at?
29:46Nope.
29:47Text out.
29:48We're still looking.
29:50We got no idea.
29:53Well, there's always an open option.
29:56The backyard.
30:00Just think about it.
30:05What the flip-flop?
30:07Boy.
30:08First my dad, now Beckner?
30:10I really do kind of like the idea of the backyard wedding.
30:14You save a lot of money.
30:15You don't have to keep looking for stuff.
30:17Get it done way sooner.
30:19You can-
30:20What are you talking about?
30:21Like the vet-
30:22Where the venue is.
30:24In the backyard?
30:25Yeah.
30:26I know exactly who put Beckner up to this.
30:29Thank you, Alan.
30:31My dad is bald.
30:34It would honestly make dad so happy.
30:37It's just, it'd be nice to just roll out of bed 15 minutes before the wedding.
30:44I would like to have a bouncy house at the wedding.
30:46I don't mean to be rude drawing to four years old.
30:53Dad is really pushing hard for this.
30:56But I'm not anywhere close to saying yes to a backyard wedding.
31:01We've only seen one wedding venue so far.
31:03So we have no idea what else is out there for us to choose from.
31:06I mean, I only plan on getting married one time.
31:09So let's make this one time special.
31:11All right, let's get buff.
31:15I mean, we did just eat ice cream.
31:17I walk right at my own speed.
31:20I don't run for a nobody.
31:23Oh, yeah.
31:24I go my own way.
31:26No matter what they say.
31:29I like it that way.
31:32When did you get this gym equipment?
31:34I got it because it's hard for me to go to the gym because of my nerves.
31:37It's hard for me to go to the gym because of my social anxiety.
31:39It's hard for me to go there in general.
31:42Um, being in the gym with another person that's...
31:46So I work out here.
31:51Me and Beckner have always had a cute little special bond.
31:56I would say out of all the siblings, me and Beckner are the most alike.
32:01He has a lot of anxiety just like I had a lot growing up.
32:05But with me, he doesn't feel like he has to hide it.
32:07He knows he can say something and I'll get it.
32:10I also have a problem with like being in the same room with people that like are sweating and there's sweats just everywhere.
32:17You get it, right?
32:19Yeah.
32:20I don't really know how to say it, but I do have anxiety.
32:25Yeah.
32:26Like, are you anxious about sleeping over here?
32:29I have to be near a wall when I sleep.
32:33I just don't know like how bad or how intense your anxiety is.
32:37So that's just why I asked.
32:39Every time I leave my room, I have to leave it better or the same when I walked into it.
32:45And what if you don't?
32:46I'll think about it all the time.
32:49And the first thing I'll do when I get back is I'll fix it.
32:54And if I do have anxiety, I just tap.
32:57Like, I'll sit down and I'll be like, I mean, like everything at school, like with my binder, my books, my Mac books and all that, it has to be perfectly even with, even with everything.
33:17Like, you probably didn't see, but when I got off, I was just going like this to try to make it even and completely straight.
33:26If I don't do that, I'll probably think about it a lot.
33:30I don't know why, but.
33:32Listening to Beckner is raising some concerns for me.
33:36My sister, Sammy, and I both went through something similar to this.
33:41And we both ended up with a diagnosis of OCD.
33:45So I'm wondering if Beckner could benefit from some kind of medical help.
33:50But first, he would need a diagnosis.
33:52And I'm not really sure how my parents feel about that.
33:56Steph, do you care, mom, if we talk for a second?
34:01Oh, my gosh.
34:02What are we doing?
34:03What's up?
34:04I just want to talk to you about Beckner, who is expressing to me.
34:07What?
34:08They're all running.
34:10I can't look at them.
34:11Okay.
34:12That's a first.
34:13Haven't done that since seventh grade.
34:15Since Beckner is here with me for the weekend, I reached out to my friend Joe's mom to see if I would be able to get them together.
34:35Splash!
34:36They live in New York, but they are so excited.
34:39She told me that it'll be absolutely nothing for them to get down here.
34:44Yeah!
34:45Holy bullets!
34:46And honestly, I thought it'd be really cool for Joe because it's been really hard for him to make friends because of his Tourette.
34:53Why is there chickens in my neighborhood?
34:58You're in the hood?
35:00I can't look at the chickens.
35:08Sometimes seeing chickens sets off my ticks.
35:13Kind of a lot of animals set my ticks off, especially farm animals.
35:20I mean, not a farm animal, but dolphins.
35:23Sorry.
35:24That was spot on.
35:27Dude, that was perfect.
35:29I'm going to look this way.
35:33Beckner, they're here.
35:36Hi.
35:37How are you?
35:38Hi, Annie.
35:39It's so nice to see you.
35:40Hi.
35:41I'm Annie.
35:42Nice to see you.
35:43Nice.
35:44Oh, my God.
35:45I'm so excited to see you guys hang out.
35:48How was the travel here?
35:49It was a little weird when we got here with the chickens and stuff.
35:52I know.
35:53You know, from New York, you know?
35:55Yeah, and like, where's the graffiti?
35:58So, how old are you?
36:01Eleven.
36:02Oh, okay.
36:03So, he just turned 12.
36:04So, you feel like the same age.
36:06Want to play now?
36:07Sure.
36:08All right.
36:09You guys are going to play.
36:10Me and Annie are going to go over there.
36:11How about a one-on-one?
36:12All right.
36:13First to five?
36:14Sure.
36:15Shoot for ball.
36:16I'll shoot for it.
36:17I'm so glad they were able to connect.
36:29It made me so sad to think that he doesn't have friends.
36:31I know.
36:32And it's hard.
36:33Thank you so much.
36:34This, like, means the world to him.
36:35Of course.
36:36If you don't mind me asking, like, what type of tics do you have?
36:39Like, physical?
36:40Uh...
36:41Mostly, uh, blanking.
36:45Sometimes cursing.
36:47I usually just have, like, anxiety.
36:51One thing that I always do, and it's tapping.
36:56Talked to Bae about it yesterday, and she asked me, like, what I'd do to, like, help it,
37:02but it's, like, I don't know how.
37:05You know what I mean?
37:06Yeah.
37:07Like, it's kind of weird.
37:09My first impression's on Joe.
37:11He's really nice, cool, fun to hang around, chill.
37:15I don't know how severe Joe's tics are, but I didn't really notice him ticking today.
37:21Is Joe the only kid?
37:22Yes.
37:23He's, like, my one and only.
37:24So when he was younger, looking back at videos at his preschool, he's singing and he's slapping
37:30himself in the face.
37:31And I was like, oh, he's so cute.
37:32He's anxious, just like his mom.
37:33Like, he's quirky.
37:35And then, like, he had this one phenomenal teacher who was like, do you notice his, like,
37:39blinking?
37:40And because of her, he got tested.
37:42We found out that he had the Tourette's diagnosis.
37:44And I was like, oh, like, how did I not see that?
37:49My mom has six kids and she hasn't noticed half the things.
37:52As a parent, you really don't.
37:53No.
37:54So, like, be gentle with her.
37:55And also, like, at, like, my parents, their generation, like, you don't get diagnosis.
38:00Right.
38:01But it helps at least answer questions about the way that you're feeling.
38:06The mantra is, like, don't put it in their head, but it's like, it's already there.
38:10Uh-huh.
38:11The more that I talk to Joe's mom, the more I feel like I need to advocate for Beckner.
38:16For me, finally hearing Tourette's syndrome made sense why things felt so hard.
38:22Like, you can't get help.
38:24Right.
38:25Medically without a literal diagnosis.
38:27So, I do want to say something to my mom.
38:29I just don't really know how she will react to the whole thing.
38:32Just talk to your mom, you know?
38:34I just want to do what's right for Beckner.
38:36I want him to get the help that he needs.
38:38Hey.
38:39Oh, there's my mom.
38:41Hi.
38:42Hi.
38:43How are you?
38:44I'm good.
38:45How are you?
38:46Good seeing you.
38:47Oh, well, this was nice to organize this.
38:48Oh, my God.
38:49Oh.
38:50So, how was sleepover weekend?
38:53We had a blast.
38:54We had ice cream for dinner.
38:55Well, yep, just ice cream?
38:58You guys didn't order in?
38:59You didn't?
39:00We had ice cream.
39:01Oh.
39:02It looks like they might be done.
39:04Bye, guys.
39:05So, have you two had fun hanging out?
39:07Yeah.
39:08I am definitely glad that Balin introduced me to Beckner, because he's cool, funny, and
39:13he gets me.
39:14He's like a younger Balin.
39:16Or like a cooler Balin.
39:19With a lot of hair.
39:20I was going to say that.
39:22I was going to say that.
39:25Bye, you guys.
39:26It was so nice to see you.
39:27Yeah, bye.
39:28Thank you so much for coming.
39:29But we'll talk.
39:30Yes, please.
39:31Bye.
39:32Bye.
39:33Babe, can I get front?
39:34Babe, can I get front?
39:35Yeah.
39:36Do you care, Mom, if we talk for a second?
39:37What?
39:38Do you care if I talk to you for a second?
39:39Yeah, no, that's fine.
39:41Oh, my gosh.
39:42What are we doing?
39:43What's up?
39:44I just want to talk to you about Beckner.
39:46What?
39:47What happened?
39:48He was expressing to me.
39:49What?
39:50They're all running.
39:51I can't look at them.
39:52Okay.
39:56Yeah, can we switch sides, actually?
39:57Okay.
39:58I cannot look at them.
39:59Like...
40:00Okay.
40:01All the chickens.
40:03I really want to be able to share this with my mom, but I'm very nervous with how she will
40:09react or what she will say.
40:11I hope she doesn't get offended or defensive.
40:15Becker expressed to me his anxiety.
40:17Yeah.
40:18It's a really big issue.
40:20Marlene's a dirty, fat, filthy, horny whore.
40:25I hope I don't say that tick in front of your mom.
40:28She knows that you can't control it.
40:30So look her right in the eyes and you say exactly that.
40:33No.
40:34No.
40:35This is so pretty.
40:36This is so pretty.
40:37That's like a little mushroom.
40:39I'm so excited to get back into touring wedding venues.
40:46Everything about this place seems perfect, but is this a place that fits within our budget?
40:51Something else that came up is her concern about Beck's obsessions and compulsions.
40:59Al, she's so preoccupied that these things run in families.
41:03It's super important.
41:04You guys are getting married.
41:06You're going to eventually want children.
41:08A medical plan is probably the number one thing when it comes to jobs.
41:13At some point, you're going to have to trust me to be able to take care of your daughter.
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