- 3 days ago
Tana Mongeau speaks on her Christmas Show, her social media break, Noah Cyrus, Winning Creator Of The Year at the Streamys, MrBeast, Jake Paul & Logan Paul, Alissa Violet drama, Mod Sun, and more.
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00:00yeah yeah and that also you just don't want to overcomplicate because tomorrow we can sit here
00:07trying to be cats on broadway but we're not so yeah so let's just do that should we do an
00:13interview right now because i have to do an interview with her basically so when is a good
00:16time for me to do that actually he just turned on his hotspot if you need internet
00:30what if i just like didn't do this oh you're such a brat you haven't even done anything else
00:52for the entire show i'm backing up i'm backing up why
00:56it's an asshole editor in the background you're not an asshole you're a nice guy
01:01oh thank you sometimes he's an asshole me with jordan yeah exactly where are you going
01:09but i'll see you way before then um either catch or town we haven't decided yet very new york of us
01:14yes i live like right over there it's the best wow wait what wait you live in new york i'm a new
01:20york but i see you so frequently in la yeah that's crazy you must be flying back and forth
01:28well and it's literally always because of logan like i always thought i'm like he like changed my
01:33life wait what do you mean yeah well because it's so funny oh paul's changed our lives yeah right no
01:40last year i literally always filmed like a christmaca list and stuff like i was telling you and last year
01:44i was like i just like gold for 2019 be unimpulsive whatever and so back in like january i was out for
01:51one day and logan tweeted at davante who like goes on for me when i'm not in yeah and i replied i was
01:56like really like i'm off for one because he had never answered before never said anything about
01:59life i was like i'm off for one day and you tweet about davante oh are you so good we all love you
02:04stagnita and so then mike got in contact with me and was like we want you to come on impulsive and that's
02:09literally it like launched my career in april no way that it is crazy because i guess like i've never
02:15had the thought that like i really started to like pants as you know what you were doing when logan was
02:19like talking about you yeah and like loved you like i just like was like oh you're right you're
02:23100 right logan fucking loves you and that's so cool i love him i love the fan that's so sick that i
02:28didn't know that that's why you're killing it you're such a good interviewer like your conversation
02:34with abby rao was so cool to me because i felt like it was like very original idea yeah well and
02:40it's always nice for me i love talking to like other women on the platform too just because like
02:45i just it's so much easier for guys yeah that's true that is very true and you're very like girls
02:50lifting up girls yeah always always um okay wait i want to take a shot with you oh my god okay we
03:02definitely do for the the camera vibes i'm gonna take like one tenth of a no we're taking a sip
03:07yeah because i take a full shot in five minutes i'm gonna be like and that's just like why like
03:12it's just like having a break i also feel like i need like a chip to chase it because i'm not good
03:17no wait look we have vitamin water oh perfect we have a chaser right here ladies and gentlemen
03:22hashtag ad follow the ceo no i'm just kidding um because i'm bad with tequila i know notice how i have
03:28not the ad well displayed period period no free promo no free and i'm not even
03:3220 times i can't even do the alcohol yeah okay um to 2020 for you for fucking you too okay
03:42i don't really drink tequila it gives me a hangover another compact but for ally i will do it
03:54it was kind of a pussy sip i'm definitely gonna get roasted in the comments mine
03:57i gotta be on my hey game oh yeah i'm such a bitch i'm like i'm done with that i'm so sorry
04:06hi hi that's actually a really good combo no that was actually really good kids yeah if you're 21.
04:11that was like when i went to impulsive and i brought vodka wow i love that you just show up everywhere
04:16without alcoholic yeah but it's the best like i really do i think a problem no it's a good ice
04:22breaker it's a good gift yeah because no one's like not like i'm happy to receive a bottle of
04:26tequila you like i got you a gift and it was like a candle like oh thanks but well and then i'll say
04:31like can't right exactly but also too like you're in my city now yeah i gotta welcome you i love new
04:37york it's in my opinion in the united states is absolutely the like messiest city for me
04:42like i get in the most trouble i do the most fucked up shit i'm like outside the club at 4a i'm like
04:47like who has the joint or a cigarette like i'm just a mess here yeah because everything stays
04:52open late whereas in la everything closes and then you have to go to like a house that's so true
04:56and i'm from vegas which like everything is open late so i've always been used to partying to like
04:595 a.m so i come here and i'm like i can take on the world do it yeah um okay so let's chat hi hi i'm
05:08nervous guys don't be nervous it's gonna be i just want to like i mean first and foremost i want to
05:14start with tomorrow night yeah you have your show here in new york yeah so how did that even like
05:20come to be well it's crazy it's actually a crazy story i just want to say though ali did just pull
05:24up to my rehearsal waited for all of my friends and i to run through the mean girls jingle bell rock
05:30dance patiently before doing this so she's really in the heat of this right now which is really nice
05:35i've seen some i love her it's it's been messy um to be honest with you i used the tour a lot in
05:41the beginning of my social media career and i've always really loved it i think it's an awesome
05:45like business it's an awesome way to meet your fans it's an awesome way to actually connect with
05:49the people who fuck with you and it's like it's such a fun way too to test out like new music or
05:53test out new like almost like comedy like a story time or something to test it out in front of the
05:57people who support you so i've always like loved it but i took like a probably a year break from touring
06:03just because i knew that when i wanted to come back i wanted to come back really hard and kind of like
06:08like do things differently and like do more music and like yeah everything be the way i wanted or the
06:13fucking highway like longer meet and greets and just like all that kind of stuff um so i spent the
06:18year kind of like figuring out basically taking a lot of interviews with like touring companies
06:23until i found the one that i felt like was like the perfect match for me and my fans and we ended up
06:27starting to work with live nation cool which for someone like me is also so crazy because it's like
06:32i'm not brand friendly live nation has never really worked with like youtubers yeah youtube events
06:38and it it almost it was like convincing them like give me a shot i can sell these tickets i promise you
06:44please so for them to kind of do that and then like the show to sell in two days we broke like live
06:48nation records and stuff yeah like it's so fucking weird to me like it's just like intense and crazy
06:54and i didn't think my career would like be doing this at the end of 2019 so now our goal is to kill the
07:00show prove the model and hopefully go on a really big world tour with live nation yeah which is
07:05crazy well and grand mercy theater is literally one of my favorite theaters here in new york it's iconic
07:09it is so iconic it is so great because the fans just fill up and are right there in front of you
07:15and above you and it's you're just it doesn't give me butterflies i know it's gonna be amazing i'm so
07:20excited it's an iconic venue yeah thanks for that you're so right holy i'm playing the grammar
07:26scene more holy i can't stop holy i'm like drunk i throw up everywhere um and it's sold out it's
07:33just weird i don't know i'm freaking out as you can tell um well what i like love the most about
07:38you i think there's i mean multiple things that i love about you but something i love everything about
07:42you that's just the whole interview this is all i love you like drunk girls in the bathroom like yeah i
07:47love you um but truly is that everything shocks you and surprises you about your success that's
07:57funny because not a lot of people say that to me but you're so right like anything good happens to
08:02me and i'm like me why no no what like you're right everything i mean creator of the year first
08:08of all congratulations hello what it's weird i i guess you're right that when you said that that
08:13was my first thought like that still shocks me so much it still surprises me so much i think there
08:17so many candidates for that award that deserved it far more my fans are fucking insane shout out mr
08:24beast shout out david dobrik y'all are so much better than me and i'm fully aware um but i like
08:29love that about you because that's what also makes you even more successful because you're so humble
08:34about you're nice that's really i think it's just like a lot of my career has been like
08:39like me making a lot of really big mistakes in front of a lot of people so it's definitely felt
08:44like kind of going through the fire and kind of growing in the public eye so when people like
08:47yeah like the creative of the year is so shocking because it's like thousands of my fans went and
08:52tweeted like hashtag vote tana like that's it's just weird to me like to think that many people support
08:57me enough to like do that like it's just really crazy i don't know i don't know i never like thought i
09:02would be in a position like this and it's just like i just view myself i guess is like a girl who's
09:07talking to a camera so right stuff like this is always weird to me but i'm really grateful i
09:11don't know i'll shut up yeah no no but i feel like stay that way too though you know because that's
09:15because when you get out of that and get into you know thinking that you're like all high and mighty
09:20and all this stuff that's what i will never think that but that's when like it's not authentic to who
09:25you are yeah i guess you're right i think that that's like my closing lesson of 2019 i feel like
09:30is like the the real importance of authenticity i feel like there were a lot of moments this year where it
09:36was like it was very easy to stray away from like exactly who i am and i wound up like
09:44watching myself like get caught up in that kind of thing you know what i mean and like hating myself
09:48for it in like so many ways this is so dark this is why i don't do it no this is like abby and i
09:52abby like so many people feel the same way yeah it's like if you if you do even just like for like
09:57my reality show there was even one scene where i look back and it's like was i being as authentic as
10:02i possibly can i overthink it a thousand times i like hate myself for it so it's like
10:06i know that if i do one thing in 2020 it is like being so unapologetically who i am and like never
10:13straying away from them because it's like i don't know it's just very prevalent to me right now that
10:16that's what got me as far as i've gotten and i don't want to lose that and it is so easy to lose
10:21yourself in this this world and the amount of opportunities too that can come from not being
10:27who you are that can come from straying away from who you are like it's very hard to not get
10:31tight and i just want 2020 to be like so about authenticity authentic friendships being around
10:36people who like make me my realest self i don't know yeah no but even like it's hard too and i
10:42think that even when like you celebrate your successes and stuff and you're like oh my gosh i
10:46can't believe all these people like tweeted votes hannah because we all receive so much hate too
10:52and so seeing that beyond like the hate and that that kind of conquered it it's cool it's weird
10:58i guess i guess you're right every time that like the love conquers the hate my mind is very quick to
11:03be like but what's the catch you know i mean instead of just like kind of celebrating that which is like
11:07a dark way to think i guess it's just like hollywood conditions right exactly like that but at the same
11:12time i i'm happy to be the spearhead you know for someone who receives a lot of hate to show like
11:19the young people who follow me like look like if i can get online every day and people are telling
11:23me like to kill myself and like i'm the worst person ever and like they hate me and like whatever
11:27like and like continue to try to do good and like turn that into something good and like continue to
11:33be unapologetically myself like if that can help some like 13 year old girl not get like bullied
11:37because she like right authentically herself like that's why i do what i do you know so it's like
11:42it's hard and it's intense but i also wouldn't like trade it for the world 100 and you have so many young
11:47fans that love you it's crazy shout out jake paulers the janna fans yeah it's crazy because it i guess
11:56i never really noticed the difference in age demographics and how prevalent it is because
12:02throughout my career i always kind of like i started and i had like 13 year old fans and then i kind of
12:07like watch them grow up and now my fan base is more like 18 19. yeah a little older like they resonate
12:12with me when it wasn't until i started spending time with jake and stuff and like i'd be in a mall
12:18and like five-year-olds were coming up to me and i'm like like this is not my demo like it right i
12:23watched it like change before my eyes to like all ages which was really like crazy you know yeah i didn't
12:29realize how different it was it's scary that is so i mean did you but you also didn't feel like you had
12:34to change yourself or anything to it to it yeah i guess but in your head it's also like
12:39like it's hard because it's like i want to continue to be me which is uncensored and authentic and
12:45say whatever the fuck is on my mind and like whatever you know but at the same time like
12:49you're like now there's a whole lot of five-year-olds watching that's what i mean i guess when i
12:53when i'm talking about straying away from authenticity because it's like now you're having
12:56all these thoughts of like do i censor myself what's the right thing to do what would a role model
13:00do and that's i guess that's why this career gets harder and harder because you start to really
13:03fucking overthink that kind of stuff yeah like those intrusive thoughts yeah um so you did just
13:10take a social media break yeah for three fucking days not even a break i'm such a meme it's so
13:15embarrassing like oh three days you had a good break good job wasn't really clear yet did you did you
13:22clear your head though i did but at the same time i was talking about this with my manager it's like
13:27i realized over this this three days groundbreaking fucking break i took that like that when you come
13:34back from a three-day break you now have six days of work to do in the next three days and that's
13:38kind of like what my career is like i could take a one week break but i know that when i come back
13:43next week i'm gonna have to do two weeks worth of work right in that which is intense it's it's hard
13:49to get a real break i guess i mean i just felt like i really wanted to clear my head step back from
13:55everything for even a second and even to be real even a second did feel good in the regard that i
14:00wasn't just sitting there refreshing twitter refreshing comments refreshing opinions refreshing
14:05youtube comments like it felt good in a way you know but i it's also all i know and all i love and
14:11all i'm passionate about and it's like yeah you know i feel like it makes you more anxious like not
14:16even be on it sometimes because you're like what am i missing i miss twitter i miss talking right
14:21yeah and it's just hard in this world because you do i mean it is one of those things that like
14:26even i think about all the time like god i wish that i could turn this off for a second yeah then
14:30you're like if i do then what's going to happen to me and like my career and like it's such a
14:35double-edged sword because it's like you want to keep everything you have you want to keep doing
14:38things but like breaks can be mentally healthy but breaks aren't good it's a lot yeah finding that
14:43balance is a lot and it's hard but again i think for me 2020 will also be kind of funny yeah mentally is
14:50there anything that you do in particular to kind of like ground yourself a little like when the
14:54cameras are off i really try to keep my friend circle full of people a that i've known for a
15:01really long time and grew up with in vegas and people that i know are going to be like uncensored
15:06and real as with me and are never going to be i see so many people with these platforms and fame
15:11or whatever and they have so many people around them that are yes men and just gassing everything
15:16they do and i watch it be the detriment of these people's mindset because it's like
15:20you know what i mean they they just become so self-inflated and so narcissistic and so
15:25yeah like delusional it's like they step out of reality because you're living in this yes yes yes
15:29oh my god you're perfect you're god you're famous like world right and i want to be around people
15:33that are like yo that fucking song sucked we do it like you know i want to be around people
15:38that even if harsh are going to make me better right so that's kind of my way of keeping
15:41yourself around yeah i love that but like aren't afraid to tough love you yeah 100 100 and just
15:46keep it real as fun you know yeah whenever i call my parents after like a big interview i'm like oh
15:51my god i interviewed um like matt damon today and my mom's like cool but did you work out and oh my
15:56god and but you know like i'm like watch your interview with abby round you were saying that
16:01but like you can call your mom after any interview and just be like she'd be like did you make your
16:05head yeah like 100 that's so awesome that your parents like do that and bring you back to
16:09earth and ground you like that yeah that's why it's important to like have those people yeah yeah
16:14um the paul brothers okay the paul brothers um how how are they how are they in your life right
16:21now dude they're killing it i really love logan so much right now logan is like i've always loved logan
16:26like don't get me wrong he's always been around he's always been so funny whatever but i feel like
16:30we're really starting to like bond and he's actually really starting to like support me and
16:33talk with me and like look at me as like his sister which to me i'm like yes you love me like
16:40something yesterday he commented like my sister is a star on my photo and i was like i know you mean
16:44this because like you wouldn't say it like i love you like it was like this whole thing so it's fire
16:50to see logan coming around jake is just like bodying life right now like boxing wise work wise like
16:57he's killing it he's really starting to take music like more seriously which i think is good for him
17:01because i feel like jake has been doing youtube for like such a long time such a crazy long time
17:07and like i feel like to have something a new outlet for him to like you know put his emotions and
17:13thoughts and stuff into is really cool like seeing that makes me really proud of him so yeah are you
17:18um at all like does it concern you like when it comes to the content of his music at all or no
17:26because it's just him like letting out his feelings it's so interesting because i'm assuming you're in
17:30reference to this new song yeah list of stuff and all that kind of stuff it's interesting because
17:35it's like when jake first told me about his new song these days i guess i can just like reference
17:40that yeah it it wasn't the concept of it wasn't concerning to me at all because it's like that's
17:45what you do with music i have so many upcoming songs that are about so many exes so many people
17:50that have been in my life so many like fucked up things i've gone through that's so important
17:54yeah especially it's like when you're on social media and like you can't fucking trust people and you
17:58don't get to let out these things and like god knows jake or i have had any fucking therapy in
18:02the last like few years like it's it's very prevalent um so for him to like let out bottled
18:07up emotion and turn it into art is like so it's literally beautiful to me like jake lost music
18:12it's so beautiful like i sound insane um but i'm just saying like that's cool like that's cool as
18:18fuck yeah but it is it's it's almost more hard the public's like scrutiny and perception and like what the
18:26media does is very intense i've definitely had a battle with that in the past few months but it's
18:31hard because it's like i made my bed and i have to lie in it like you get fucking married in front of
18:35the entire public eye like oh no people are making articles on you like you did that you know like
18:39i take full responsibility for everything that's going on in the media but it's it's interesting because
18:44it's like yeah i didn't even think twice about him releasing these days and then i i probably should
18:50have thought about well like until someone else like places media on it or places meaning on it
18:56that yeah or just kick-pop reacts dana mojo reacts everyone like like it can just be like really
19:01intense because it's like in reality i don't i don't want to kind of release the song like
19:04fuck it up but at the same time i don't ever want anything i never want to look like someone's
19:09bitch i never want to look dumb i never want things to be at my expense i've always kind of like
19:13my my image online has always been like boss bitch like role model don't let anybody like someone
19:19cheats on you break up with them someone's you know whatever like stand up for yourself so i i
19:24worry that the lines can be grayed in that regard you know i don't want people to look at what jake's
19:30posting and everything like tana's not standing up for herself properly it's all very like fine lines
19:36it feels like a juggling act yeah well and you're so open with your fans too that i think that if it
19:41came to that point you could always be like yeah this is what's up this is how i feel and all that
19:46matters is really what they think and i guess that's true i i got i got to a point toward the
19:50end of this year where i was afraid to do things like that because it's like i am at a point where
19:54no matter what i really say regarding my relationship or love or anything like there's
19:59going to be some people that are mad at whatever i'm saying no matter what it is you know and i got
20:02to a point where i was like i'm so scared to say anything because like i don't know how people are
20:05whatever and like but that's not authentic like at the end of the day you need to just say what's
20:09authentically on your mind that's why i took a break because i felt like
20:11um a lot of things i could say to a lot of people asking me a lot of questions would be very like
20:18short sweet like you know answers that weren't like appeasing yeah what you thought they wanted
20:24to hear exactly and it was like i'd rather just step back and assess how i really feel about everything
20:28and make sure that when i do answer people's questions it's with the utmost authenticity i guess
20:33yeah i love that you took the time to be able to be it scares me i never i don't i don't ever want to
20:39lose that like like connection with my fans but it's it's hard when you're balancing a lot of
20:44shit but also no shade to like alissa or the entire banks oh yeah like i fucking love alissa like she's
20:50so fun like she's been through some crazy shit and like yeah he's like a warrior you know she's fire
20:54like it's it's a weird it is a weird balancing act because i feel like people want me to like
21:00play into the narrative yeah but it's like i'm focused on so much so much work i'm so much more
21:05focused on like when i see jake in real life we're so busy i'm i'm in new york right now he's in
21:10fucking he's going to big bear in a second like you know we're not always in the same place so it's
21:13like when i do see i want to focus on us personally not like what do you think about julissa like it's
21:19just like not right i don't know yeah well and then also i will your new music like what's that going
21:25to tackle and that's coming it's tackling so much it's crazy because that too like when i was kind of
21:34feeling a lot of these like feelings in my head and thoughts or whatever i literally ran to the
21:37studio random odds and was like this is how i feel i want to make a hundred thousand songs about it and
21:42like the studio really does just like become therapy for me in a lot of ways because it's
21:47like whatever's on my mind i'm like i want to write about it even if it doesn't become a song i'm
21:50like i'll put it in a book i'll do something with it yeah i'm writing two books right now about like
21:53everything anyone's ever wanting to fucking know is the point um that should be honest um no but
22:02so my upcoming songs my next song is kind of a sad love song about not feeling like you can like
22:09breathe or exist without someone um but it also is inspired by a lot of things i've been through
22:15not really one thing so like i know i know there'll be people trying to place like who hurt me to make
22:20this song but in reality i'm just like filled with drama so um and so you're are all the songs
22:30written are you gonna release an album is it just gonna be a bunch of drops i don't know i want to
22:34i know i want to release a single next i can see myself releasing like two more singles and then
22:38like an ep maybe but that's so nerve-wracking i don't know music's hard because i'm very like
22:42sorry i'm dying um picky and like indecisive and like just like i overthink it all so it's like my
22:51mind could change at the drop of a hat tomorrow you know yeah stay tuned i guess yeah sometimes it's
22:57hard to be smart because you just think so me every day literally it's a lot yeah yeah well and you do
23:05juggle so much i mean you have like it's funny because i know how you feel about you know people
23:11if they think that you know or jake's taking advantage of you or things like that um but all
23:17of the stuff that you do and just how you are a total boss in every aspect in your life like there's
23:25just no possible way for that to even be you're sweet i don't know i i just like to people that say
23:31things like that i feel like it's like people really forget that because i'm living on this
23:36platform and like online that i'm just like a person who is like literally just making mistakes
23:41just like every other person like every 21 year old like bitch in the world is making relationship
23:46mistakes but mine are just at in the public in the public yeah exactly so it's like like oh my god
23:51like you're fucking i'm so bad with jake you're like oh my god you're gonna let him do that or
23:54whatever i'm like we're just people i didn't fucking know i was gonna do that like people
23:57fight like it's like i don't think people realize that like i'm not claiming to have a
24:02perfect relationship i'm not claiming to be perfect i'm not you know no i think you're doing
24:08right yeah and honestly like at the end of the day i just like care about jake so much as a person and
24:14i don't know what the future holds and like i just no matter what always want to be like best friends
24:19and close i could never imagine a life where i'm not like close with him so i think people are kind of
24:23expecting this like together forever there's gonna be this big detrimental breakup or like
24:28how much can she take like how much can he take or like whatever but like in reality like even if
24:33something were to like happen like i don't know i just i always like see him in my life and care
24:38about him and i don't want to get to a point of like slander and weird shit yeah i want to be happy
24:42i don't know i'll shut up i love when you talk i love when you talk um i want to talk about you
24:48working with matson in the studio though because like he is your good friend um he makes great
24:53music tell me just about like working together on this music i love him it's like we
25:02were working together for so long making music and we were at this point where people were just kind
25:08of like locking us in the studio together and be for 12 hours and being like main music and we both
25:12like didn't really know each other it was like okay like what do you want to make music about and after
25:17a while it was like okay we're gonna be in here for like 10 fucking hours like let's go let's make
25:21the best fucking show we can make i'm gonna pour my soul out right now and then it just kind of ended
25:26up being like 12 hour studio sessions of us like sobbing to each other like our family and like
25:32life and like fucked up shit you know what i mean to the point where it was like i was excited to go
25:37there because i felt like it was someone who actually understood me and listened to me and was helping
25:41me turn my like pain and just things i was feeling in general like into art and like put purpose to the
25:47things i'm going through versus just going through them and bottling it up and like someone who's so
25:51like me in so many ways so it was like to make music and make something i'm so passionate about
25:55with someone that i feel like can literally write from my brain and like understand me and like
26:00understand my vision and like listen to me and make me better teach me i could go for hours yeah
26:05it's so cool it's not just like a producer it's like one of my fucking best friends in the world so it's
26:09like it's sick it's awesome that things worked out the way that they did yeah i love that and i love
26:13that you guys are so supportive of each other yeah that's like how it comes to like keeping those
26:17good people around you i 100 agree 100 like having someone who's like genuinely supportive of you and
26:22like just wants to see you win like it's awesome because this industry is filled with so many
26:27shitty fucking people yeah yeah trust me hey everyone sorry about it sorry about it
26:35i can't even imagine you probably deal with so many assholes celebrities i can't even talk on the cameras
26:39either um so collabs um you are close with noah cyrus 20 or bfs could you guys work together um
26:50i could see us working together but it's funny because like noah and i have anything or like
26:54the opposite of that like we don't we don't really want to work we're like we see each other we're like
26:58let's get high as fuck and stare at the fucking tv for eight fucking hours and just like die laughing
27:04and it's awesome like it's awesome to have those friends that kind of can take you almost like away
27:08from work yeah and like away from reality and i feel like that's like what noah and i kind of do
27:12best for each other but also like i'm so inspired by everything she does and like noah noah is really
27:18one of the people who this year made me realize like the importance of mental health the importance
27:22of turning your pain into art the importance of keeping people around you who inspire you and teach
27:27you and lift you up and whatever and like she really made me want to do a lot of stuff in 2020
27:31like advocating for mental health using my platform for the right reasons like stuff like that i don't
27:36know she's i love that it's a good friend um finally compare tana at the start of 2019
27:43to the tana sitting next to me right now oh that is so dark
27:50that is dark no i tana at the start of 2019 his life was so much easier than this tana i think that
28:01it feels like 10 years has passed since like that me you know i think that this year was a so much
28:11growing up so much growing up that came from so much up like i learned so much about myself so much
28:20about this industry so much about like love i feel like i really learned across 2019 how many
28:25fucked up things i was kind of like bottling up too and like you can't just keep doing that forever
28:30in the end of 2019 it really has been all of the things i've been like bottling up just like coming
28:35out all while like exhaustingly throwing myself into like shooting my show shooting another show like
28:42shooting commercials shooting all these secret projects trying to make youtube videos still trying
28:46to be mentally healthy trying to sleep trying to plan this tour trying to like write songs trying to
28:49just everything and it's like i don't know it's really taught me what i can handle it's really
28:54like it's interesting i don't know that's hard tana at the end of 2019 is it's crazy i feel like a
29:03completely different person in the ways that i've grown yeah it's interesting i don't know yeah but i
29:07feel like all the things i've learned this year i'm really gonna put into making my best self in 2020
29:13which is like all you really can do do you feel like you're stronger now
29:16worlds worlds stronger worlds world i could like i can take so much more thrown at me
29:24at this point i know now what i would want to put myself through versus you know like i just
29:29feel like a lot of 2019 was me just kind of blindly like doing shit having fun and thinking
29:35in the moment and then either seeing the repercussions of that or having fun with that
29:40or whatever and now it's like i feel like i i just think so differently i calculate things more
29:45i just i look out more i'm responsible like it's different i don't know okay i'm proud of you
29:53i fucking love you you're so nice i like felt that in my soul thank you i like you've always supported
29:58me you've always been like so great to me it's crazy i've been wanting to do an interview for like
30:03far too long guys she's the go i love you love you wait is that it yeah wow that was like easy that
30:10was like yeah okay oh my god it's almost like we're fucking friends or something we love you
30:18i feel great okay i'm drunk and ask her questions oh my god literally you gotta get me blacked out
30:23at some point
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