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Short filmTranscript
00:00Tonight on a Hard Quiz
00:02Martin, Engineer
00:04Expert Subject
00:06Concrete
00:08Finn, Student
00:10Expert Subject
00:12Aussie Rock Band
00:14King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard
00:16Freddy, Teacher
00:18Expert Subject
00:20Video Game Mario Kart
00:22Victoria, IT Project Manager
00:24Expert Subject
00:26Science Fiction Franchise
00:28The X-Files
00:30Here's your host Tom Gleeser
00:32Yes!
00:34Hello!
00:36Thank God you're here
00:38Welcome to Hard Quiz. These contestants
00:40are cakes. The last one to be baked
00:42will be tonight's Hard Quiz Champion
00:46To be part of the show at home
00:48go to the ABC TV iview socials
00:50Let's say hello. G'day Victoria
00:52G'day Tom. Now the X-Files is your
00:54expert subject. Did the
00:56X-Files set you up for a lifetime of
00:58conspiracies? Well they were a lot
01:00more fun in the 90s when
01:02they weren't kind of mainstream
01:04sort of it was just like are UFOs real
01:06not you know is the world round
01:08yeah they're the issues that we're facing now
01:10just to be clear conspiracy theories
01:12aren't mainstream now either
01:14well they're getting a lot more
01:16publicity shall we say now not that I
01:18agree with them. But they're still a fringe element
01:20not the vast majority. 100%
01:22and this is a fictional TV show
01:24and I'm well aware of that. No it's not
01:26No my show is. No Hard Quiz is
01:28real and I'm a real person
01:30and we are both here
01:32Now you met David Duchovny when you
01:34just happened to be in the hotel he was
01:36staying at in Brisbane. Exactly. Yes
01:38just happened to be there. Yeah and by that I mean
01:40you emerged from behind a pot plant as
01:42you got out of the elevator
01:44Well I think both of your faces
01:46represent that that has just happened
01:48Yes. So how did he react
01:50when you jumped?
01:52When I walked calmly towards him
01:54he was very polite and
01:56took the selfie and then
01:58got in the elevator as soon as he possibly could
02:00and went up to his room so
02:02Yes. You looked very happy to be there
02:04I was yes. And he does not
02:06Freddie
02:08G'day Tom. Now what makes Mario Kart
02:10better than the millions of other racing games
02:12out there? Well I was sort of a trailblazer
02:14so I think it was the real first kart racer
02:16and it paved the way for
02:18the future races to come
02:20Do you like the way it brings the whole family together
02:22or the way it splits the family apart?
02:24A bit of both at the moment
02:26because I'm always in the lead
02:28I sort of I'm happy with how it's
02:30going because yeah
02:32the rest of the family split
02:34but I'm always way out in front
02:36of the pack. Is that why you came on this show
02:38just to rub your family's nose
02:40A little bit yeah
02:42How old's the rest of your family?
02:44I've got a four year old and a two year old
02:46And you know who's boss don't you?
02:52Now you did your science honours thesis
02:54on sexual reproduction
02:56I did. So did you get an A for F-ing
02:58or an F for A-ing?
03:02Finn. Tell us.
03:04King, Gizzard and The Lizard Wizard
03:06is your expert subject
03:08I'm already confused. Is this a monarch
03:10an animal, a fantasy game or
03:12or a body part?
03:14None of them. It's nothing really.
03:16Okay. What is it? It's a band from Melbourne
03:18you know it's got like six members in it
03:20they've got like 26 albums now
03:22So they're quite prolific. Yeah
03:24It's not the kind of music you'd pull out at a party
03:26because the party would stop
03:28I mean I don't know what parties you're going to
03:30but count me out
03:38Now you're doing a Master of Philosophy degree
03:40What are your philosophies about? Maths
03:42I don't know
03:44About to start a PhD in Maths
03:46so just sort of never leaving the university
03:48So I'd be really into this band because I did Maths at uni too
03:50Yeah and yet you're a comedian and
03:52I'm just a student
03:54but it all works out in the end
03:56So you're what I used to be
03:58whereas I'm
04:00like you if you lived out your dreams
04:02Yes
04:06Martin
04:08Hi Tom
04:09Your expert subject is concrete
04:18Martin what do you love about concrete?
04:20I'm an engineer so I have no imagination
04:22so I need to come up with something hard
04:24Okay
04:25I think what do I work with?
04:27Concrete
04:28So what's your favourite concrete?
04:30Probably low strength about 25 MPa
04:33slump of about 110 millimetres
04:35Mine too!
04:38Now you're an engineer though it's fair to say
04:42you're not the nerdiest one here
04:44Is that rare for you?
04:46Usually yeah
04:48I'm saying in this lot you're the cool one
04:50That can't be right
04:52I know it's not right at all
04:54So here's you with a concrete beam
04:58Is that your version of getting a photo with David Duchovny?
05:02Alright let's play
05:06Hunt!
05:07Expert round
05:08Expert subject
05:10Win or lose 5 points
05:12Steal and answer
05:13Double points
05:14I'll ask each of you 5 questions on your expert subject
05:17Right you get 5 points
05:18Wrong I will take 5 points from you
05:20The rest of you can steal at any time to get double points
05:22Let's start with Martin and his expert subject
05:24Concrete
05:25The second most widely used substance on earth
05:31Concrete is typically made by mixing cement with aggregates like sand or crushed stone
05:36And what liquid?
05:37Who the steal is Victoria?
05:39Water
05:40Correct
05:41Double points to you
05:45Featuring large expanses of raw exposed concrete
05:48This building is an icon of what post-war architectural style?
05:52Martin
05:53Oh
05:55Cubism
05:56Incorrect
05:57Pin for the steal
05:58Frutalism
05:59Correct
06:00Double points to you
06:03Using a special concrete made with volcanic ash
06:06The Pantheon was built nearly 1900 years ago
06:09In the capital of which ancient empire?
06:11Victoria for the steal
06:12The Romans
06:13Correct
06:14Double points to you
06:19What was so good about Roman concrete Martin?
06:21They were the earliest adopter of concrete and they
06:24The type of concrete that they used lasted a very long time
06:27Because they actually mixed it with seawater
06:29Oh
06:30But if you mix modern concrete with seawater now it'll rust
06:33In 2008 concrete was pumped to a record breaking height of 606 metres
06:39Martin
06:40The Burj Khalifa
06:41Correct
06:42To construct which Dubai building?
06:46Yeah the Burj is correct
06:48Last question in your set Martin
06:51Known as spalling cracks like these in steel reinforced concrete are typically caused when the steel begins to what?
06:58Martin
06:59Corrode
07:00Or rust
07:01All right next set of questions is for Finn on King Gizzard and the Lizard Lizard
07:11I actually hadn't heard any of their stuff so I listened to the album the other day and I loved it
07:15Which one?
07:16It was uh Nonagon
07:17Is it called Nonagon Infinity?
07:18Yeah
07:19Yeah it was the best
07:20Cause I'm into maths
07:21And this song's called Nonagon which is a nine sided polygon
07:24And they've got infinity in the title
07:26I'm like this is f***ing nerd rock!
07:29I loved it!
07:30I thought where's this been my whole life?
07:35Formed in Melbourne in 2010 King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizards early vinyl records were mailed out in what takeaway food?
07:41Pizza boxes
07:42Correct!
07:43What takeaway food packaging? Pizza boxes is correct
07:48How disappointing when you open a pizza box but instead of a pizza you've got a record by some stoner garage band
07:56That are actually really good
08:01Featuring a spoken word narrative set in the American frontier the album Eyes Like the Sky was largely inspired by which movie genre?
08:08Speedy Western
08:11Correct!
08:15Have a listen to this
08:21Polygon Wunderland was one of how many albums the band released?
08:24Five in 2017
08:26Correct!
08:28Greatest in 2017
08:29Five is correct
08:32Known for constant experimentation the band won its first ARIA award for best album in which category?
08:39Finn
08:40Rock
08:41Incorrect!
08:42It's wide open
08:44Victoria for the steal
08:45Best album
08:47Incorrect
08:52Time's up!
08:53Hard rock slash heavy metal
08:55Rock album is another category
08:59Last question in your set Finn
09:00Described by frontman Stu Mackenzie as probably the most literal song he's ever written is the band's tribute to which breakfast spread?
09:08Vegemite
09:10Correct!
09:12Yeah some of the lyrics are I'll have breakfast with my girlfriend and we'll have toast with avocado and tomato and Vegemite
09:21I guess when you're putting out five albums a year
09:24He's
09:27Alright time now for Freddy and Mario Kart
09:34So who's your biggest rival in Mario Kart when you play?
09:37Ah my brother so he does get me so most of the time sometimes I sneak a victory in
09:42If he was here do you think he would do better than you at Hard Quiz or not as well?
09:46Well it'd be hard to be going worse than me at the moment but
09:50Well not really you just haven't started yet
09:52Sure
09:53On the starting line here we go
09:55Released in 1992 for the Super Nintendo console the first Mario Kart game includes which notoriously difficult multi-coloured tiled racetrack?
10:04Freddy?
10:05Rainbow Road
10:07Yeah there's no guardrails and you can't play it on the slowest engine speed so it's very easy to fall off the track
10:15And according to our researchers it can absolutely get to ****
10:18I saw Finn trying to get in on that one by the way
10:25Yeah
10:26You should be nervous
10:28You have a uni student with too much spare time breathing down your head
10:31Yeah
10:33Mario Kart for the Wii console introduce motion controls with Nintendo making an accessory
10:39Finn for the steering
10:40Steering wheel
10:41Correct!
10:42Double points to you
10:44To turn your controller into what car parts steering wheel is correct
10:48It's called the Wii Wheel
10:50Which sounds like something you put in a urinal
10:53Players can obtain items to help them as they race including the spiny shell which is primarily what colour?
11:00Freddy?
11:01Blue
11:02Correct!
11:04Yeah the spiny shell targets whoever is leading the race
11:08Would you like to use a spiny shell on Finn, Freddy?
11:11It'd be handy
11:16It's tense isn't it?
11:19It's nerd on nerd action
11:23The original Mario Kart features eight playable characters including Mario's brother who has what name?
11:30Freddy?
11:31Luigi
11:32Correct!
11:35Last question in your set Freddy
11:37In 2020 Nintendo won a lawsuit against a company running Mario Kart themed tours in multiple cities
11:44Martin for the steal
11:45Tokyo
11:47Incorrect
11:48Finn for the steal
11:49Japan
11:50Correct!
11:51Yes!
11:52Thank you
11:53Thank you
11:55OK
11:56Last set in the expert round is Victoria and the X-Files
12:03I was going to save it for a surprise but David Duchovny is hiding in a pot plant outside the studio
12:08I'm off
12:10The X-Files is a TV show that combines an ongoing alien conspiracy plotline with standalone stories in episodes commonly referred to as...
12:18Victoria
12:19Monster of the Week
12:20Correct!
12:22As the What of the Week, Monster of the Week is correct. Have a listen to this
12:27The show's theme song was based on a sample included with the Proteus synthesizer with the wife of composer Mark Snow contributing what sound?
12:43Victoria?
12:44Is it the whistle?
12:45Correct!
12:49Hey honey, I'm busy terrifying a generation
12:53Can you just come in here for a sec? I need your help
12:56Whistle into this
13:01In the episode Little Green Men, Dana Scully hacks into Fox Mulder's computer correctly guessing what X-Files tagline...
13:08Victoria?
13:10Correct!
13:12What X-Files tagline as is password? Trust No One is correct
13:17Speaking only four words in the first season, the show's main antagonist is widely known by what nickname?
13:22Victoria?
13:23Cigarette Smoking Man
13:25Correct!
13:26I also would have accepted Smoking Man or Cancer Man
13:30Yeah, if they made it today, he'd be the Vaping Man
13:34It'd be hard to be menacing when you smell like cherry melon
13:38Last question in your set, Victoria?
13:41In a crossover episode with The Simpsons, Scully and Mulder investigate an apparent alien, Victoria
13:47Mr Burns?
13:48Incorrect, I'll finish the question
13:50An apparent alien visitation in Springfield
13:53When Mulder shows his ID, he reveals a full body portrait of him wearing what?
13:58Finn for the steal
13:59Just little speedo undies
14:01Correct!
14:02Double body steal
14:03Yeah, that's like my ABC ID
14:20You know what's cool about that is we didn't need Photoshop or anything
14:24Alright, we've slid through their subjects, now let's slide through mine
14:28Tom's Round
14:30Tom Suckett
14:32Multiple Choice
14:34This week I've been really getting into lips
14:37I love lips, they show me where to put all the pies
14:40This round is multiple choice, select your answers on your screens and press the buzzer to lock in the answer
14:45Which Batman actor do these bat lips belong to?
14:48A Val Kilmer, B Michael Keaton, C George Clooney, D Robert Pattinson
14:52The answer is C George Clooney
15:02You three got it right, even though all of Gotham couldn't even work out its f***ing Bruce Wayne
15:09The Rolling Stones iconic lips and tongue logo was originally inspired by what?
15:13A the Hindu goddess Kali
15:16B Maori tribal carvings
15:18C this photo of Albert Einstein
15:20D Mick Jagger's lips
15:22The answer is A the Hindu goddess Kali
15:27Yeah, Jagger wanted a logo as recognisable as the Shell petrol logo
15:32Good to see he was aiming to be a corporate sellout right from the beginning
15:35Which of these is not a common name for a type of lip piercing?
15:41A Madonna
15:43B Munro
15:44C Medusa
15:45D Miley
15:49The answer is D Miley
15:52B Orbicularis Aorus
15:53Yeah
15:54Thank you
15:58The main muscle that helps humans pucker up their lips for kissing is called what?
16:03A Basiatus Smuchus
16:05B Orbicularis Aorus
16:07C Osculum Major
16:09D Savium Radialis
16:13The answer is B Orbicularis Aorus
16:16It's also known as the kissing muscle
16:24And at high school so was I
16:27I went to an all boys boarding school
16:32Last question in my rounds were double points
16:37According to the Sun newspaper
16:38A lip reader claimed Prince Harry said what?
16:41To his cousin Eugenie's husband at King Charles III's coronation
16:46A William wants to punch me in the face
16:49B I'll head out soon so I can flee
16:52C I'm fed up with the way they treat me
16:54D Oprah's house is bigger than Windsor Castle
16:57E I could have got a better seat but I didn't want to, you know
17:01F Thanks Meghan chose this suit for me
17:03The answer is C I'm fed up with the way they treat me
17:10And after the coronation Harry fled in the suit that Meghan chose for him so William wouldn't punch him in the face
17:19Alright at the end of my round Freddie you're at the bottom on zero, get over here
17:22So do you think your brother Luigi would have done better?
17:34Yep he probably would have done a little bit better than last
17:37Hard to do any worse at least
17:40I don't know I've seen others manage it
17:43Right you ready to go?
17:44I am
17:46Help!
17:48Here we go
17:49Alright, it's the people's round
17:55The people's round against the clock
17:58Slip your suit, play along at home
18:00Your time starts now
18:02Banoffee pie is made with what fruit?
18:04Victoria?
18:05Banana
18:06Yes
18:08Which major war ended in 1945?
18:09Victoria?
18:10World War II
18:11Yes
18:12Vixen is the term for the female of what animal?
18:13Victoria?
18:14Deer
18:15No
18:16Which notable New York statue wears a seven spiked crown?
18:19Victoria?
18:20Statue of Liberty
18:21Yes
18:22The swordsman Zorro uses what letter as his mark?
18:25Martin?
18:26Zed
18:27Yes
18:28Commonly applied to a bad sunburn is gel from the plant aloe what?
18:31Victoria?
18:32Vera
18:33Yes
18:34Neil Patrick Harris plays a teenage doctor in which 90s?
18:36Victoria?
18:37Doogie Howser MD
18:38Yes
18:39Which 90s TV show? Doogie Howser is correct
18:41Ticket to Ride is a board game originally based on what mode of transport?
18:45Victoria?
18:46Train
18:47Yes
18:48Time's up!
18:52Alright, the end of the people's round, Martin you're at the bottom on ten, get over here
19:02First of all, congratulations on being the only player other than Victoria to get a question right in the people's round
19:08What would you do differently if you had another shot at it?
19:11Actually look at architects instead of engineers to understand what brutalism is
19:14I think you've learnt what brutalism is
19:19You ready to go?
19:20No
19:21Ok
19:22Now
19:23Who's going to be the hard quiz champion? Finn and Victoria get over here because it's time to play hard quiz
19:35Final round, head to head, the X-Files versus King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard
19:42Hard win
19:44Now there can only be one hard quiz champion who gets to take home the limited edition big brass mug
19:48What will you do with the mug if you win Victoria?
19:50I think I'll get it melted down for some alien implants
19:53Oh
19:56What about you Finn?
19:57I reckon bury it in a field and just let future civilizations work out what it is
20:04It's best to fire penalty shootout style, harder questions on your expert subjects
20:08So it's Finn's knowledge of King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard
20:11Versus Victoria's knowledge of the X-Files
20:13Let's play
20:14Hard
20:15So yeah Finn I listened just to the one album and I loved it
20:22Well you should listen to more then
20:23I think I will
20:24You've got what 25 more to go through and there'll be another one soon enough
20:29We could go to a gig together or would that be weird?
20:32I could be a chaperone or something
20:38You could just pretend I'm your dad, that'd be alright, or would that make it weird?
20:41My dad's got a lot more hair and
20:46Finn, characters from the so-called Gizverse recur throughout the band's work
20:51On the Fishing for Fishies album cover, who is seen Fishing for Fishies?
20:57Yeah, so there's a little robot guy, he's wearing some cool little funty clothes, like got some overalls on
21:04Yeah
21:05And his name is an anagram of humanity and his name is Han Taiyumi, with a little dash between the words
21:10Correct
21:16Victoria, as the show was primarily filmed in Vancouver, Canada, producers created a New Mexico desert setting for one storyline by physically altering a local quarry using what?
21:29Yes, I know this one, this is one of the mythology episodes and what they did is they painted it all red so that it looked like New Mexico
21:40Correct
21:44Finn, exploring Middle Eastern style quarter tone tuning, the album Flying Microtonal Banana
21:52takes its name from what other thing called the Flying Microtonal Banana?
21:57So, because they had used microtonal tunings, you can't just use standard instruments, so they had custom guitars made and the Flying Microtonal Banana is the guitar that Stu has, which is a yellow guitar that, it's a banana because it's yellow, you know, but it's his guitar
22:15Correct
22:22Yeah, that's right, so it's Stuart McKenzie's custom guitar
22:25Western music has 12 notes, but microtonal music uses smaller intervals, so there are more notes available
22:31It's a giant wank
22:34I think I'm about to get into it
22:37Victoria
22:38During a three-way phone call from their separate hotel rooms in Season 7, Mulder Scully and FBI Assistant Director Skinner are all revealed to be doing what same activity?
22:49Yes, I know this one
22:51They are all in a bubble bath
22:55Correct
22:56Yeah, that's how I do all my script meetings as well for Hargis
23:03But we're all in the same bath
23:07And HR, you can just f*** off, okay?
23:12Marty?
23:14Oh shit
23:15Finn, in the music video for People Vultures, the band form different parts of a giant vulture
23:24Place each member of King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard in their correct positions on the bird
23:33Alright, I reckon, I feel like Stu was probably in the centre of the middle pair of legs
23:39I remember Ambrose being on the left
23:42But that wouldn't make sense because he's usually on the right on stage
23:46But, you know, part way there, may as well keep going
23:49Fairly sure the two drummers were both on like the breasts of the bird
23:55But as for their order
23:57Two drummers?
23:59Yeah
24:00I play the drums, I didn't know there were two drummers
24:02You do play the drums?
24:03Yeah
24:04You could be their second drummer
24:05Oh, awesome
24:06Yeah
24:08I'm just gonna
24:10I don't know, let's do them in that order
24:13And then
24:16Joey I'll put there
24:17Because he's often that side of the stage
24:20And I'll use the same logic for these two
24:23I realise I've just replicated the stage order, but oh well
24:26I'm just gonna say that
24:30Close
24:32It's actually completely wrong
24:34So Stu's right at the top
24:39Oh
24:40He's the neck essentially
24:42Cook was to that side there
24:44But next you should have had
24:47Joey
24:50Lucas is correct
24:52And then at the bottom
24:54Ambrose in the middle
24:56Eric there
24:57And cab there
24:58And cab there
25:00And that's the correct answer
25:06Let's have a look at the band in vulture mode
25:09They did it for real
25:10Yeah, that's how they normally are
25:11They had to be surgically removed
25:12Alright, Marty
25:16Okay
25:18Victoria
25:20A central plot point of the first X-Files film
25:23The alien black oil virus also appears in the TV show's sixth season
25:28With the smoking man's ex-wife giving it what one word name?
25:33Actually, I think I read this earlier today when I was revising
25:38And yeah, now I can't remember
25:41That's what I look like when I watch the project by the way
25:43Thanks
25:47I think it's something that starts with like
25:50A P
25:52It's like
25:54Panera or something like that
25:56So yeah, that's my answer
25:58Incorrect
25:59Incorrect
26:00The correct answer is
26:02Purity
26:03Yes, okay
26:04You're right, it did start with P
26:05But yeah, the answer is Purity
26:06Yeah, that's way off
26:08Finn
26:09The grandmother of keyboardist and harmonica player Ambrose Kenny Smith
26:13Is credited with vocals on which track from the album Omnium Gatherum?
26:18Um, she does the vocals on Steady Sorceress
26:21Correct
26:27Is she the Lizard's Gizzard?
26:28She's the Lizard's Gizzard's Lizard
26:31Victoria
26:34Fuelling fans desire for a Scully Mulder romance
26:37The episode Arcadia
26:39Sees them go undercover as a married couple
26:42Using aliases that refer to what other long-running TV show?
26:47It's the show with Dick Van Dyke
26:50And Mary Tyler Moore
26:51Is it the Dick Van Dyke show?
26:53Is it the Dick Van Dyke show?
26:57Correct!
27:02Finn
27:03At Sydney's Secret Garden Festival in 2014, King Giz's performance was abandoned after 8 minutes
27:10For what reason?
27:12I really have no idea so I just have to spitball some reasons here
27:17Um, I feel like with that sort of thing it's usually weather related
27:23Um, 2014, I don't know if Sydney had any events but it's the best I can guess, was it rained on?
27:29Incorrect
27:32The correct answer is the stage roof collapsed
27:35Oh epic!
27:36Yeah
27:37I mean
27:38Yeah
27:39Not bad but that's cruel
27:41Yeah, no the stage roof collapsed so they had to abandon their performance
27:44Victoria, if you get this right you are tonight's hard quiz champion
27:47A 2018 study showed the theorised Scully effect to be a real phenomenon
27:53What is the Scully effect?
27:56I know this one because she's a pretty inspirational character
28:00Sort of one of the first really strong female leads
28:04And it's the Scully effect is more women in STEM areas of research and career
28:10Correct!
28:11Which means you are tonight's hard quiz champion!
28:13Alright Finn, you know what this means
28:16Help!
28:18There she goes
28:23Congratulations Victoria, you are tonight's hard quiz champion
28:26Which means you get the big cross, right?
28:29And you get to do the side-off
28:31Thanks for playing!
28:33Help!
28:35The truth is out there
28:38The truth is out there
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