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"We had a conversation with the producers and I spent about 15 minutes trying to turn one of the characters into something I could play," the 'Killing Eve' creator told the Comedy Actress Roundtable.
Transcript
00:00Phoebe you obviously again you are have wearing all different hats sometimes it's it's just the
00:10writer sometimes it's writing and and acting curious a how do you make those choices where
00:17are you most comfortable and I've heard I think I've heard you say with with Killing Eve you
00:21initially it was it was very freeing and then all of a sudden you were like I'm kind of jealous
00:27I'd like to be in this yeah I guess acting in in Killing Eve I felt very early on that it just
00:33didn't feel right and I don't really know why I just felt like it's I'm not in there I can't see
00:39it and then we had conversations with producers and I I sort of spent everything about 15 minutes
00:42trying to turn one of the characters into something I could play and she was just the character was
00:45going oh it just felt much more organic to do it like that and then but then with something like
00:53Fleabag that that's that character comes from like the depths of me so that's a different
00:59I'm curious on Fleabag I mean you talked a lot about sort of when you started with the first season
01:04that it was about this sort of you were inspired by the cynicism you felt in in your 20s and a bit
01:08of the sort of female rage what inspired this season and um well let's start there
01:15well I was completely convinced and had said with a great amount of smug artistic integrity that I would
01:21not come back for a second series but the idea really came from again the journey I'm going to
01:25take the audience on because what was exciting for me about the first series was I felt like I'm
01:29inviting the audience in because it's direct address and then by the end the character is trying to push
01:34the audience away and so I wanted the audience to feel complicit and that was a strange story
01:38that strange experience for them and because she knocks the camera back at the end of the last
01:43series I was like well she doesn't want them there anymore she doesn't want you there so I can't
01:47and her guard is down because she admits something at the end of the series which
01:52which makes her very ashamed and her guard's down so the idea of bringing the camera back in and her
01:56going like forget about that you know like I'm back again just felt really false and so
02:00and like so I thought I was going to leave it and then I had an idea of how I can play with the form
02:06again and what the camera what the audience would mean to her again and what she would mean to the
02:11audience and what that relationship had to be new because it was new for me coming back to this
02:15audience is a slight coyness going like okay I know you know everything about me now is the
02:19character whereas the first series is her going I'd never want you to find out I never want you to
02:22find out and then at the end it's like and this series begins with her going I know you know
02:26everything so we're going on a different journey together
02:28for better or for worse how do you wish you were more like your character
02:37I think it is for it is both for better and for worse because I think I think Fleabag says what
02:44she thinks whether it's to the camera privately or in real life she says what she really really
02:48thinks in the moment and I think I'm still learning how to do that writing for me and writing these
02:52characters for me is like how I do that so I write women who don't give a shit because I'm teaching
02:57myself how to be one and yeah I feel such a catharsis when I do turn to the camera and just like say that
03:03fucking line and then it's just such an amazing feeling I'd like to have a bit more like that
03:07we're not supposed to tell our truth specifically it's very revolutionary it's like the ether shifts
03:15when women tell their truth specifically I'm telling you I agree with I learned how to be a woman by
03:20watching other women like I felt I grew up without a mom so I felt like a female impersonator
03:25me too and I right hundred percent right and I and so that and I didn't want to ask for the
03:33information so I'd go into my friends bathrooms and I peek in their cabinets and be like oh that's
03:37facial cream okay my mom's still with us and we're very close but she's a always been just beautiful
03:45this Hungarian queen you know this princess and and I felt like similarly I was always in person like
03:51I never felt like a real female because I had that okay that spot's already taken in our house
03:56I'll be this other thing I'll be this gremlin I'm a tambour on my mother when it was a girly girl
04:02I was a proper proper tomboy I was called Alex I shaved my head I had like boxer shorts I was I was a boy
04:08did people think you were a boy yeah they thought I was a boy yeah and did you love it when they did
04:13oh I thought it was a huge couple yeah me too I remember going into like gap or something with my mom
04:18and the guy said what does the young man want yeah and when I started getting when I started
04:23getting hair on my legs I was like thank you I mean I was so serious about it and I think it was
04:27because I was really batting against that idea of having to be a girl or girly or whatever it was
04:32totally healthy the same very healthy reaction
04:48you
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