- 9 hours ago
- #realitytvdeep
The Death of Bunny Munro Season 1 Episode 3
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Scenes of a sexual nature and scenes which some viewers may find distressing.
00:05Please be aware that this program also contains themes of suicide.
01:00I dreamt too calm in the night.
01:19But I looked and you weren't there.
01:24Just a dream.
01:27I know.
01:30I'm sorry.
01:41I've got to think of it, mate.
01:44I had a pretty weird dream too.
01:48Yeah?
01:49Oh yeah.
01:50Pretty weird, alright?
01:52I dreamt that someone told me that they hated being a shitty Navigator and wanted to be a salesman.
02:03Wild.
02:04What?
02:04What?
02:09What?
02:14Oh my god, it was real!
02:18What do you reckon then?
02:22You ready?
02:22No.
02:24Good a time as any.
02:26Okay.
02:28Can't be crying though, can't we?
02:32Hey.
02:34Not gonna look too good, is it?
02:38No.
02:40Please, can you buy more stuff?
02:44Not gonna go down well, is it?
02:48No.
02:50You know my old man was in antiques.
02:56When I was little he used to take me out in his van.
02:58Find some run down old place.
03:00A real drum.
03:02Owned by some rich biddy with a load of filthy cats and he'd go in.
03:06And honestly,
03:08before I had time to finish my sandwich,
03:10out he'd come with a nice little queen and dressing table.
03:14Yeah, the gift, my old man.
03:18The talent.
03:20He taught it to me.
03:22And now,
03:24I'm handing that to you.
03:26You understand?
03:28Okay.
03:30Oh, Christ.
03:44Didn't happen to notice the Hulk creep in and beat the crap out of me last night, did you?
03:50All right, ready, Mr. Sousman.
04:00One more time.
04:02You've got the finest range of creams, lotions and balms.
04:06And you'll find this?
04:08And you'll find this?
04:10And you'll find this color?
04:12Collagen.
04:13With elastic.
04:14Elastin rich.
04:16Elastin rich cream,
04:18which will improve your skin smoothness and make you look younger.
04:22But what if I forget?
04:24Well, then make it up.
04:26Remember, she's not buying the product, she's buying you.
04:32And who are you?
04:36Who the fuck are you?
04:38I'm Bunny Monroe.
04:40That's absolutely fucking right.
04:42Tell me again.
04:43I'm Bunny Monroe.
04:44I'm Bunny Monroe.
04:48Oh, baby.
04:52It's a commitment.
04:54It's a commitment, baby.
05:02I'm not my old wife.
05:04I'm not my old wife.
05:06I'm not my old wife.
05:08It's gonna flow, baby.
05:14It's a commitment, baby.
05:16We've got to love one another or die, brother.
05:27Oh, baby,
05:29because it's super glue.
05:31It's super glue.
05:32It's super glue.
05:33It's super glue.
05:34The super moon.
05:40Knock him down.
05:48And you'll find this collagen and elastin-rich cream will improve moisture up to 300%.
06:04But...
06:07I don't think you need it.
06:10Actually, Dad, I think you've got the wrong house.
06:14OK, I can't cope. Take my money.
06:18Really?
06:19I'd buy a dose of poison off you, you little cutie.
06:23I'll have two bottles.
06:25OK.
06:26You know what? When you see that, Dad and his boy just...
06:30It just gets me, you know?
06:33Right here.
06:36Where?
06:49Right, mate.
06:51Why don't you go and wait outside while I take care of the boring old paperwork, yeah?
06:55OK, Dad. It was nice to meet you.
07:00Hey.
07:02What I mean.
07:04Thanks, Dad.
07:07Oh, God.
07:08Oh, it's...
07:12So cute.
07:13Oh, I mean.
07:14Oh, my God!
07:17Hey!
07:19Are your dad in my house?
07:21We're salesmen.
07:22Is that your dad in my house?
07:34We're salesmen.
07:37He's given a one.
07:40He's the best salesman in the world.
07:42You could sell your bicycle to a barracuda.
07:47For what?
07:48It's a predatory fish.
07:50Its jaws are armed with hundreds of razor-like teeth.
07:54Oh.
07:57You can hear her from miles away.
07:59She sounds like a strangled chicken.
08:04My mum died.
08:07I wish my mum would die.
08:17You all right, Tony?
08:18What's your trouble?
08:30For fuck's sake.
08:36Is that your dad?
08:44That's Tony.
08:45He's mum's boyfriend.
08:49What's he like?
08:51He's all right, I guess.
08:55Dad bought me this.
08:56The bike?
08:58No, just the bell.
08:59It's a really cool bell.
09:02You think so?
09:04Yeah, it's great.
09:05Junior!
09:12Junior, get in the car.
09:15Oh, fuck, John.
09:16Hello?
09:19Bye, then.
09:21Bye.
09:24Okay.
09:26Yeah, it looked like this.
09:27Come on.
09:28Come on.
09:28You're all right, Tony?
09:29All right, Tony?
09:29All right, Tony?
09:29All right, Tony?
09:30Everything's absolutely fucking perfect, my boy.
09:32All right, let's just pass your fucking break here.
09:34I've never done living the land.
09:36Fuck!
09:36Telling you, buddy, boy, nothing like getting your pipes cleaned first thing in the morning.
09:52Who was your mate?
09:54She just came and talked to me.
09:56Oh, right.
10:01Fancy her, did she?
10:02Dad.
10:03All right.
10:03She did, though, I can tell.
10:06She had that special light in her eyes.
10:07Yeah?
10:08Yeah.
10:09Telling you, buddy, boy, I can spot it a mile off.
10:12Maybe I should give her one.
10:18Well, one day, buddy, boy.
10:23One day.
10:27So, where are we going next?
10:29I don't know.
10:30Check the list.
10:31I don't have the list.
10:33What do you mean you don't have the list?
10:35You had the list.
10:36Well, where did I put it?
10:37I don't know.
10:38Oh, I must have left it, but, uh...
10:41Fuck.
10:46Do we need it?
10:47We're salesmen, aren't we?
10:48Yeah.
10:49Well, how the fuck are we going to be salesmen with no customers?
10:53So, should we go back and get it?
10:56Listen, I'm going to teach you the first rule of salesmanship, okay?
10:59No, fuck it.
11:00The first rule of being a man, never go back.
11:03So, what are we going to do?
11:05Just stop flapping your feet about.
11:07I'll work it out.
11:10Morning.
11:11Oh, no, no.
11:14Now, she's the social worker from my house.
11:20Fuck it.
11:24Tell you what, bunny boy.
11:25Why don't you head next door?
11:27Grab yourself some sweets.
11:29Then have a little sit outside.
11:31Too nice to be cooped up indoors, eh?
11:34Thanks.
11:34Good boy.
11:34Right, then.
11:41Okay.
11:42So, what happens now?
11:44I call the police.
11:45Police?
11:46What the fuck are you talking about?
11:49Mr Monroe, a Section 20 child protection order had already been filed when you absconded.
11:53When you absconded.
11:54It's now been escalated to a missing person.
11:56And the police are looking for you.
11:57He's not missing, is he?
12:00He's right here with me.
12:01Stop.
12:02Listen, his mother has just died in the most tragic of circumstances.
12:07And I can't begin to explain the effect that has had on him.
12:10It's a fucking tragedy, if you must know.
12:12Right now, that boy needs his father.
12:20Don't do it.
12:21What are you doing?
12:22You know there's a payphone down the road.
12:24I know.
12:24We'll be gone by the time you reach, yeah?
12:29The door won't open until it's finished spinning.
12:31Fuck.
12:31Yeah.
12:36He's just a child, Mr Monroe.
12:38He's my boy.
12:40You're just showing him the ropes.
12:44I'm sorry about your wife, Mr Monroe, but this is what's best for Benny Jr.
12:48I do hope that one day you understand.
12:50What you gonna do?
13:02What you gonna do?
13:12Ready, boy?
13:13Come on.
13:14Look lively.
13:14Good boy.
13:28I gave you a list.
13:30I know you did.
13:31I need a new list.
13:32Well, those were good leads.
13:33They'll give me some more good leads.
13:35I can't keep giving up good leads every time somebody loses a list.
13:38I didn't lose it.
13:40What happened to me, then?
13:41Well, Jesus Christ.
13:42Jeffrey, have you ever heard of an act of God?
13:44What's happening?
13:45It means it wasn't my fault.
13:47So, Jeffrey, sweetheart, I'm gonna get in the car and I'm gonna come to the office and I'm
13:51gonna get the list.
13:51No, no, no, no, no, no.
13:52I wouldn't do that, my friend.
13:54You know, I've had the police in here asking lots of questions about you.
13:57It's probably best if you lay low for a bit, bud.
13:59What?
14:01Why?
14:02That woman called them, the one with the missing money.
14:08And what did you tell them?
14:09I told them that I didn't know where you were.
14:11Did you tell them that I didn't take it?
14:13Did you tell them that I wouldn't do that?
14:16Jeffrey?
14:18Jeffrey!
14:19Jeffrey!
14:19I told them that I didn't know where you were.
14:22For fuck's sake!
14:45Dad, are we going back to the office?
14:48No.
14:49But don't we need another list?
14:51Yeah.
14:52So, how...
14:53Second rule of being a man.
15:03Make sure you've got at least one mate.
15:05I'll never let you down.
15:07It helps if you think the sun shines out of your ass.
15:11So don't aim too high.
15:12Hello, you dirty con.
15:14All right, poodle.
15:15I'll break hot.
15:15Get to the phone right now.
15:16So if you leave a message after me, you won't holler back.
15:24I know where we'll be.
15:26We're going to the pub.
15:28The pub?
15:30Cool.
15:30You all right, bud?
15:44All right, babe.
15:44You all right, babe?
15:45All right, babe?
15:46Poodle!
15:46Oh, Gaz, has Poodle been in yet?
15:47No, I've not seen him.
15:49Genia, come here.
15:50Sit down, we'll have a quick one while we wait.
15:51Okay.
15:52Large scotch and a coke, yeah?
15:53A coke.
15:54Make it quick, eh, bud.
15:55You know you're allowed on to speedy.
15:56Yeah, yeah, I know.
15:57No school today?
16:00No, no.
16:01No, no, no.
16:03You all right, babe?
16:03All right, babe.
16:04Poodle!
16:05All right, bye.
16:06Poodle!
16:07Oh, Gaz, has Poodle been in yet?
16:08No, I've not seen him.
16:10Genia, come here.
16:11Sit down, we'll have a quick one while we wait.
16:12Okay.
16:13Large scotch and a coke, yeah?
16:14Coke.
16:15Make it quick, eh, bud.
16:16You know your lad ain't supposed to speedy.
16:18Yeah, yeah, I know.
16:20No school today?
16:24Oi, what are you doing?
16:38I feel so cold.
16:45Dad, when are you going to go home?
16:51You want to be a top salesman?
16:52Yeah, of course.
16:54Well, top salesmen have got to be like sharks.
16:57Roofless, efficient, killer sharks, okay?
17:00Okay.
17:03You know what happens to a shark if it stops moving?
17:06What?
17:15He suffocates.
17:23Yeah, okay.
17:32Sorry.
17:33Well, fuck me, the boys!
17:55Fuck!
17:56You're absolutely steaming me.
18:02Hi, Poodle.
18:04What are you doing in here, little man?
18:06Just having a quick one.
18:11You, my little friend, are just too much.
18:13What, you were too busy to come and have a drink with your old pal?
18:16Come on now, as if I'm ever too busy for my mate, Poodle.
18:23Good to see you.
18:25Gary, couple of scotches and another coat.
18:28Yeah, in a minute.
18:29Joe, you're appreciating for...
18:30I'm gonna lie, I've been pretty fucking busy working my list mate.
18:33Oh yeah, pretty fucking busy or pretty busy fucking?
18:36Well, I do like to go above and beyond for my customers.
18:39Hell yeah.
18:40I know.
18:41What's that fucking...
18:43What?
18:44You alright?
18:45What's that?
18:47A few drinks with the boys?
18:50What more could I ask for?
18:52Daddy.
18:53You're right.
18:55Listen.
18:56I think I need a wee actually, Dad.
18:58Yeah, go on.
18:59Over there.
19:00So, Pood, mate.
19:01Been a bit of a hot streak actually.
19:03You managed to learn right through my list.
19:06So, I was gonna ask if...
19:09There was any chance I could...
19:13Hey.
19:15You sure you're alright, mate?
19:17Come on, man.
19:18Come on, man.
19:21Hey, hey!
19:22Who?
19:23What are we doing?
19:24Woo!
19:25Noodle!
19:26I need a worm, mate.
19:27Come on.
19:28Oh, Lord.
19:29Woo!
19:30Woo!
19:31Woo!
19:32Woo!
19:33Nice!
19:37Fuck's sake.
19:38Who?
19:39He's gonna be moving.
19:52Please calm down.
19:53Who do?
20:08Weird, isn't it?
20:09Isn't it?
20:17You don't have to understand, you know.
20:20It's okay to be a little boy.
20:23I love spaceships.
20:25Beatles.
20:35Who want?
20:39John!
20:49I'm Harry.
20:53Hey, Poodle! Get out of the fucking way!
20:55Fuck off!
20:57Come on!
20:59Move it!
21:05All the way down.
21:07That's the way, Dad.
21:09One.
21:23Hey, poodle.
21:24Show it to me!
21:26It's all right, guys, he's had a few too many, mate.
21:28Back the fuck up for you!
21:30Go on, go on, show me!
21:32Show me!
21:33Fuck this!
21:35Call me down now!
21:37Fuck off!
21:39Hey, hey!
21:40You want a pussy?
21:41Eeyah!
21:42Come here, come here, come here, come here.
21:43Fuck you!
21:44What's the matter with you?
21:46Let's get you another drink.
21:54Sorry, is this your room?
21:57You're all right.
22:05You're here with your Dad?
22:06Christ.
22:07You didn't fancy the film fair, no?
22:08I'm not a little kid.
22:09All right, mate.
22:10You're a salesman on the road.
22:17We'll be going soon.
22:18All right.
22:19Work him on, is it?
22:21You don't, hon.
22:27All right, mate.
22:31You're salesman on the road.
22:32on the road we'll be going soon all right working man is it
22:50maybe what in any of this then come on poo what's up with you a she's gone what
23:00you talking about mate who's gone I know my honest she's fucked off bald and it's
23:06like you're my mate are you yeah it's like she's talking with her all of a
23:16sudden it's gone I can't make a sale I can't fuck I can't work anymore all right
23:28don't panic okay it's just one of those things
23:33happens to everyone it's happened to you
23:37well no but it's happened to people I know
23:45you mean me
23:49yeah
23:53no don't worry poor old bud will sort you out
23:58Gary get us a couple more drinks would you
24:00you're right
24:16yeah I should go
24:22my dad's probably wondering where I am
24:27back to work right
24:30working man
24:34actually
24:37can I please have some
24:42take it
24:46thanks
24:49good luck
24:52everything's going to be all right
24:58thanks bonnie
25:00it's good to see you mate
25:10you too
25:11yeah
25:13yeah
25:14I didn't just come in to say hello though you know I was after a bit of a favour actually
25:27what favour
25:30look truth is I ran into a spot of bother caught my pants down you know how it goes
25:37and I managed to lose my list I was going to ask for a couple of names of yours but actually if you're not in the zone right now then maybe I should take the whole thing off your hands
25:49what do you reckon
25:50that's why you're here
25:52that's why you've come to see me
25:56fucking
25:56yeah
25:57I'm not being rude poo but do you really think I've got time to be sitting around listening to your sob stories
26:02it's your fault
26:07what is
26:08you fucked her
26:12after the wake
26:14who
26:14Annie
26:15did I
26:18no
26:18please
26:19poodle
26:19what does it even fucking matter
26:21wait
26:29what the
26:30get off
26:31get the fuck
26:32you're a con
26:37a true proper total con
26:41I've been your best mate for years
26:43and I love you
26:44but you don't give a fuck about anybody
26:47but buddy fucking Monroe
26:49no one did you kill yourself
26:51she had a condition
27:01you knew that
27:02everyone knew that
27:03she was ill
27:04there's nothing me or anyone could do about that
27:07it wasn't my fault
27:08none of this is my fault
27:09if you want to hold on to a bird for two fucking minutes poo
27:15maybe try not being such a fucking loser
27:17lost it
27:18lost what
27:20lost it
27:20you never fucking had it
27:21you're a part-timer mate
27:23and also run
27:24and if your bird
27:25was so special
27:27why don't I even remember fucking her
27:29poodle
27:37poodle
27:40poodle
27:40poodle
27:45poodle
27:47dad
27:49poodle
27:51poodle
27:52I want you to say sorry to me
27:53poodle
27:54poodle
27:54say sorry
27:55poodle
27:55say sorry
27:57and then will you give me the fucking list
27:58oh my
28:02poodle
28:03poodle
28:05poodle
28:19poodle
28:22poodle
28:23poodle
28:23poodle
28:23poodle
28:31fucking hell
28:31it's alright mate
28:33it's alright
28:33I've called the police
28:35my wife's on the phone to an ambulance
28:37it's alright
28:38please
28:38did you see the number plate
28:40help is on the way
28:42just stay as still as you can
28:44wait where the fuck are you going
28:47you can't just fuck off
28:49Oi!
28:52Hey!
28:55Where are you going?
28:57You can't fucking leave!
29:19You can't leave!
29:20Go, go, go, go!
29:25Let's go, go, go!
29:26¶¶
29:56¶¶
30:26¶¶
30:56If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this programme,
31:05help is available online at sky.com forward slash viewer support.
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