Skip to playerSkip to main content
Terra.Anatolia
  • 15 hours ago
Transcript
00:00I think I should go.
00:19What?
00:20No.
00:21No.
00:22The night should end, don't you?
00:23The night doesn't have to end now.
00:24Oh.
00:25How exactly do you see the night ending then?
00:27I don't know.
00:28Maybe we stay the night.
00:30Slipping into some of those fancy robes they have.
00:33I'm gonna go see if they have any rooms open.
00:41Can I buy you a drink?
00:43Sorry?
00:44I'd like to buy you a drink.
00:46How about, uh, martini?
00:49Yeah.
00:50A vodka martini for the lady?
00:52I'm actually with my boyfriend.
00:54That guy?
00:55No, he's no good for you.
00:56You'd be better off with someone else.
00:59Aren't you a little old for me?
01:01I am indeed, but I'm not buying you a drink to hit on you.
01:06Why else would you buy me a drink?
01:08Oh, what's going on?
01:10This guy bought me a drink.
01:11Says you're no good for me.
01:13Oh, yeah.
01:14Mind your own business, Grandpa.
01:16Well, that's the thing, Steve.
01:18This is my business.
01:21See, I'm a private investigator.
01:23I was hired by your wife, Donna, to figure out whether you were having an affair.
01:28And since that's not Donna, it seems like you are.
01:31Yeah.
01:32Married.
01:33Last week, when he canceled your dinner because he was called into surgery, he was actually
01:38at his kid's dance recital.
01:40And he's not a surgeon.
01:43He manages a pep boys.
01:45Hey, hey, hey, hey.
01:46Hey, look.
01:47I don't know what she's paying you, but I will double it if you forget what you saw here tonight.
01:52Plus, free oil changes for life.
01:55That's not how this works, chum.
01:58You see, private investigators like myself, we obey a strict code of honor.
02:04We don't do this for the money.
02:06We do this to pursue the truth.
02:08Because the truth is all the...
02:10Oh, jeez.
02:11I'm so sorry.
02:13My legs asleep.
02:15That ever happened to you?
02:17Oh, man.
02:18I must have sat on that stool too long.
02:21Just give me a second here.
02:24Come on.
02:25It feels so weird.
02:27It's like, whose leg is this?
02:30Ah, shoot.
02:31Anyway.
02:33You folks have a great night.
02:37You seen how I got you that drink?
02:40Hmm.
02:47Nice composition.
02:50You're really coming into your own as a photographer of gross dudes.
02:54Had a lot of practice.
02:56Yep.
02:57They're always cheating.
02:58They're always cheating.
03:00Nine cases in the last year.
03:03They're all the same.
03:04Client says, I think he's having an affair.
03:07I follow the guy for a couple of days, and I catch him in a very suave way where my body functions normally.
03:15What?
03:16I want a real PI case.
03:19Something I can sink my teeth into.
03:21Something juicy like Pacific View.
03:24Okay.
03:25First of all, you're not a real PI.
03:27You're an unlicensed trainee.
03:29Second, these cases, the ones that you've been assisting on, this is the job.
03:33Most PI work isn't juicy.
03:36It's dull.
03:37Pacific View is one in a million.
03:42We have a walk-in?
03:43Julia Kovalenko?
03:44Yes.
03:45Jack Barringer, president of Wheeler College.
03:47This is our provost, Holly Bodgemark.
03:49Provost is basically vice president.
03:51I was gonna Google it after they left.
03:53What can we do for you?
03:54This morning, my laptop was stolen.
03:58Okay.
03:59I don't think you need to hire a private investigator.
04:03What's the laptop worth?
04:04A thousand bucks?
04:05This laptop is worth $400 million.
04:11Juicy.
04:13These are standard NDAs.
04:15Regardless of whether we take the case, everything we discuss will stay within these walls.
04:19Good.
04:20Because this is a delicate situation.
04:22I've been president of Wheeler College for two years.
04:27Ever since I arrived, I've been trying to get our richest graduate to make a donation.
04:31His name is Brad Vinnick, CEO of Vinnick Capital.
04:34I know that name.
04:36Wait.
04:37Is he?
04:38What else am I supposed to do?
04:40I will not apologize for being successful.
04:42These complaints about my private jet use are absurd.
04:45Your plane has made two round-trip flights from San Francisco to Aspen every day for four years.
04:51My dog is in San Francisco.
04:55My dog, Walker, is in Aspen.
04:58What else am I supposed to do?
05:00That unfortunate interview notwithstanding, Vinnick is worth about $6 billion.
05:07Like all small colleges, Wheeler is struggling and it is a really special place.
05:13You don't have to tell me.
05:14My daughter went there.
05:16And my son-in-law.
05:17Love to hear it.
05:18Go acorns.
05:19I got Vinnick to pledge $400 million to keep Wheeler afloat.
05:23We shook hands on the terms last night.
05:25This morning I got to my office, my laptop was stolen, and I received this email from somebody called Wheeler Guardian.
05:32Brad Vinnick is a lying snake.
05:36You take one dollar of his blood money, I spill all your secrets.
05:41What secrets are on your laptop?
05:43Hell if I know.
05:45That doesn't matter.
05:46It's messy.
05:47And billionaires hate messy.
05:49The one freaking out if he somehow finds out that two years ago I had a botched calf implant in Miami.
05:54Hypothetically.
05:56We can't go to the police because we can't afford a scandal, but the actual contract won't be signed for months.
06:02And if the blackmailer succeeds in sabotaging Vinnick's donation, Wheeler College may just disappear.
06:09Well, let us talk it over.
06:12There's no need. We'll take the case.
06:15This is clearly an inside job.
06:20Every single faculty member could be a suspect.
06:25Which means you have to find someone from outside the school to go undercover and investigate.
06:32Your only chance to save Wheeler College is if you have.
06:44Okay, let's start with the basics.
06:46That's your ID card on top that gets you into any door on campus.
06:50Also, inside the folder is the list you requested.
06:52Everyone working on campus the night the laptop was stolen.
06:55Students don't arrive until next week, so for now it's just faculty.
06:59How many of these people knew about the donations?
07:01No way to know.
07:02I mean, it hasn't been announced officially, but gossip travels fast around here.
07:06The laptop was stolen off Jack's desk next door.
07:09I can show you his office.
07:11It used to be four small offices, but Jack had it remodeled.
07:15He said he needed a private bathroom more than he needed an HR department.
07:19Please don't touch anything. Jack is very fastidious.
07:23Okay, we should start by reviewing any camera footage that you have, along with geolocation data from the swipe cards.
07:31We should start that way, but we can't because our cameras broke years ago and we can't afford to get them fixed.
07:37Aspirin?
07:40Nicotine gum.
07:41I don't even chew it anymore.
07:43It works faster if it goes right to the stomach.
07:45How many people had access to this room?
07:48Anyone with a swipe card, which is everyone.
07:50And to answer your next question, our system is so old, we can't even track who went in what door.
07:56Friday we are unveiling Vinnick's official portrait as a distinguished graduate.
08:00Part of the charm offensive.
08:01Most of the people on that list will be at the party.
08:04Okay, since Charles is undercover, you likely won't see me unless we meet at my office.
08:09I am off to a meeting for another case.
08:11See you at the party Friday.
08:13Until then, I will be engaging in PLOP.
08:17P-L-O-P.
08:21Prepare, Learn, Observe, Pursue.
08:24PLOP.
08:26Is that a spy term?
08:27It's a famous one.
08:29I'm not sure who invented it.
08:32Some genius, probably.
08:34Okay, off to PLOP.
08:38So much worse when you use it as a verb.
08:41Hi.
08:54Now a good time?
08:55Yeah, yeah, yeah.
08:56Come in.
08:57Have a seat.
08:58Can I get you anything?
08:59Water?
09:00Calcium supplement?
09:01Knee brace?
09:02I'm good.
09:03Okay, so my stupid company keeps merging with other stupid companies.
09:07Uh, Bynum Southwest Pacific is forming a strategic partnership with Northeast Atlantic Retirement.
09:12The new company will be called Southwest Northeast Atlantic Pacific.
09:17Catchy.
09:18Yeah.
09:19So we're gonna have a bunch of new employees and we need to do some background checks.
09:22Um, do you want the job?
09:26Well, to be honest, I'm a little surprised you want to hire me given that you once called me a
09:32remorseless, bottom-feeding, two-faced rat.
09:36Yeah, I did.
09:37Mm-hmm.
09:38But that's water under the bridge.
09:40I gotta admit, you did a great job on the case with Gladys.
09:44And honestly, I'd rather have somebody I know and turn to this.
09:47Okay.
09:48Yeah.
09:49Send me the files.
09:50Great.
09:51Hey, uh, Nancy's stuck in her bathtub again and she's not alone.
09:55Oh, hey, Froggy.
09:56How's it going?
09:57You wanna help me with something?
09:59Well, by all means, save Wheeler College.
10:03I mean, it's the best.
10:04Do you realize that it's almost the 25-year anniversary of when we first met?
10:08Tell me again how it happened exactly.
10:11Well, we were on the freshman orientation camping trip.
10:15Literally day one.
10:16And I looked at him and he looked at me and I said, do you know anything about camping?
10:23And I said, not one thing.
10:25And we smiled at each other and I felt like I got struck by lightning.
10:31And then, like, two weeks later, she introduced me to you guys.
10:36Yeah.
10:37Oh, I remember.
10:38You had a very interesting hairdo.
10:40Look, Adam Duritz of the Conning Crows convinced a lot of guys my age that they could pull off dreads.
10:46I made a lot of bad choices.
10:48And one great one.
10:50Good save.
10:51Julie, it's 7-12 AM, day five.
11:01This is the first of my weekly reports.
11:04I once again object to doing these weekly instead of daily.
11:08Too bad.
11:09They're boring.
11:10I know you think they're boring.
11:12But in a case like this, every detail is crucial.
11:17My class will meet Monday and Wednesday in Burnham Hall, room 331.
11:24Fun fact.
11:25Thornton Burnham, for whom the building was named.
11:28Boring.
11:29The campus is small.
11:32It's only about 116 acres.
11:36That's just shy, and I do mean just shy, of 47 hectares.
11:42Oh, my God.
11:44Anyway, during my first week of PLOP, I met a number of possible suspects.
11:52Andrea Yee, professor of economics.
11:55Very upbeat.
11:56You must be going to this event on Friday.
11:58Who is Brad Vinnick?
12:00He's a multi-billionaire grad, supposedly making a huge donation.
12:04Hopefully, some of it goes to the econ department, because God knows I could really use a raise.
12:09You know, I haven't bought a new bra in six years.
12:13That's not your problem, though.
12:16It's nice to meet you.
12:17You too.
12:18Not a likely suspect.
12:21Max Griffin, assistant professor of journalism, just published a book called The Fourth Estate, America's First Line of Defense Against the Second Coming of the Third Reich.
12:34Excited to read it.
12:36Don't be.
12:37It's terrifying.
12:38You a motorcycle guy?
12:39How'd you know?
12:41I always forget I'm carrying this thing around with me, you know?
12:47I'm guessing you're not a big Brad Vinnick fan.
12:50You going to that party Friday?
12:52I'm not really interested in kissing the ass of a billionaire corporate oligarch.
12:57But they do serve these amazing tiny empanadas, so I might stop by.
13:03Slavaj Tishibili from linguistics, and Jarko Hovonen, professor of semiotics.
13:10What exactly is semiotics?
13:12I've never really known.
13:13Uh, it's a complicated subject.
13:17Yeah, it's hard to define.
13:19Contemporary post-Plumfeldian language analysis investigates phonology, but I did spout real art.
13:25Jar, give me the point, Jar.
13:26You must start to signifier and signify it.
13:29Move through structuralism to post-structuralism.
13:31No, that's where you use the framework to put it inside.
13:33You put a framework to what kind of carbon?
13:35And he's going to come having a...
13:36I talked to them for about 20 minutes.
13:38No idea what they said.
13:40Let's just assume they're not suspects.
13:42But I may know someone who is.
13:45Charles Neuendijk, visiting lecturer in engineering.
13:48This is Dr. Benjamin Cole, head of our English department.
13:51Dr. Cole is a Wheeler College lifer and a very dear friend.
13:55Ah.
13:56And yes, before you ask, he has always been this way.
13:59So what's your specialty within the department?
14:04I teach romantic poetry and the 19th century novel.
14:08Just one novel?
14:09Sounds easy.
14:10Droll.
14:12If you'll excuse me, I have to get ready.
14:16I assume you're going to the cocktail party later for Brad Vinnick?
14:20I am, out of professional necessity.
14:23You don't approve of Vinnick?
14:25Do I approve of Vinnick?
14:27Did Antigonus approve of Etesias?
14:30Boy, I don't know.
14:31Oh, I apologize.
14:33I forgot what you teach.
14:35I'll ask it in a way you can understand.
14:38Did Garfield approve of not having lasagna?
14:41Ah, come on now.
14:44Engineering is an advanced science.
14:47Oh, yes.
14:48That bridge is big.
14:50What if we built one that's bigger?
14:53Fascinating stuff.
14:56Dr. Benjamin Cole is my first suspect.
15:00He's prickly, has an axe to grind,
15:03and he kind of hurt my feelings.
15:06More later.
15:07New and Dyke out.
15:09Okay.
15:11Okay.
15:12Any headlines?
15:13Couple small things.
15:14One woman left her job quite suddenly,
15:16but I think it's innocent.
15:18The other was just a public intoxication charge from college.
15:21Oh.
15:22That's a load off my mind.
15:24Thanks so much.
15:25Mm-hmm.
15:26So, how you been?
15:28Working on any hot new cases?
15:30Yeah, we've been busy.
15:32Good.
15:33Same.
15:34Actually.
15:35Corporate just told me I have eight weeks of vacation
15:37I have to take by the end of the year.
15:39I have no idea where to go.
15:41Any recommendations?
15:43Hawaii.
15:44Oh, yeah?
15:45You love it there?
15:46I've never been.
15:47I don't take vacations,
15:48but I've heard people like it.
15:52Yes, I've also heard people enjoy...
15:55Hawaii.
15:59Okay.
16:00Well, thank you so much.
16:02Hey.
16:03Everything good at Pacific View?
16:12Maybe.
16:13What do you remember about Dee Dee Santos Cordero?
16:16Beloved leader, caught you red-handed,
16:19called you a remorseless bottom-feeding two-faced rat
16:21in an email I deleted before you could read it.
16:23I read it.
16:24She hated my guts, right?
16:26Until you and Charles went and apologized or whatever, yeah.
16:30Anything I can help with?
16:32No.
16:34What?
16:35Oh, no.
16:36It's okay.
16:37What's that?
16:38It's okay.
16:39I know you're not.
16:40I'm not even kidding.
16:41I was just kidding.
16:42It's okay.
16:43It's okay.
16:44It's okay.
16:45It's okay.
16:46pretty ugly isn't he sorry oh the him
17:16the him yes i mean i suppose he's classically handsome square jaw and all that but his soul
17:28his soul is ugly charles newendike visiting in the engineering department mona margada professor
17:38of music theory how long have you been here oh gosh i got my phd in 1984
17:47i came here a year later
18:01okay
18:04that is too much i'm so sorry but there's no smoking in the museum
18:10really because i'm standing with the president here and he doesn't seem to mind
18:14right jack yeah i do not clarifying mr vinnick an ashtray please thank you thank you so much
18:20thank you
18:22vinnick is unbelievable we're paying for a cash bar at our own party and he's handing out hundred
18:28dollar cubans well that brand of confidence is found only in the ultra wealthy american male
18:36and the fattest hippo in central africa yeah news flash the billionaire is a narcissist
18:41so are you back and yet we still love you oh well excuse me elizabeth i'm not a narcissist i'm an
18:50egotist there's a difference he made a ton of money and now he wants to give some of it to us
18:56why does this upset you so much the wheeler distinguished graduate awards traditionally given
19:02to poets musicians and activists will today be given to a man who's concerned only with his own
19:09coffers and whose sole talent is extraction and not contribution he's a plague they're more like him
19:17every day hell is empty and all the devils are here it's the tempest act one scene two okay well
19:25throwing a party for a billionaire is a small price to pay to keep all our jobs right to keep this place
19:31alive yes well there is one price i'm willing to pay uh maxwell may i buy you another drink yes please
19:39i agree with you
19:39and i've been here ever since so 1985 to 2025 that's 40 years what you asked me how long i've been
19:55at wheeler yeah an hour ago right sorry so i compose music and sometimes a song will pop into my head and
20:05if i don't stop whatever i'm doing and go someplace very quiet and write it down it'll disappear
20:12most people here are used to it i forgot you're new you look so familiar could we have met before
20:21somehow possible but most people our age recognized me from lavender highway
20:27now it's goodbye baby well it's goodbye baby well it's not like me to stay too long
20:43i remember that song was that you that was me that was my band i was 18 years old
20:50we played at woodstock wow you know we had weirdly similar lives because when i was 18 i was on the
21:00local news for growing a really large squash so i guess we both understand fame
21:09do you still perform that song no not since the band broke up 50 years ago people ask me to all the
21:17time but i don't like living in the past so i have to make the rounds or are you going to stay for a
21:24while i am good thank you claire hi how are you guys good evening professor how's it going it's good
21:38making progress talked with mona margodoff what's the deal there what's going on with her do you mean is
21:47she like a possible suspect she's on the list i gave you huh what about her husband is he a suspect
21:55oh no he died like 15 years ago copy that husband has alibi graveyard okay good ready to meet vinnick
22:08well yes hold up sweetheart boom
22:17brad congratulations again um this is charles newendike visiting professor in engineering
22:24finally a useful discipline might even lead to one of these kids getting a job
22:29all these pointless subjects philosophy art history fashion design hey look it's my senior thesis pants
22:36oh let me introduce you to my wife and daughter oh yeah i can see the family resemblance nope that's
22:45the word this is rebecca my daughter from my first marriage and this is my newest wife kelsey rose hi
22:55isn't that so funny the two of us she's so much older than me but she's my daughter it's like go to
23:00your room little missy and do your homework i'll give you i'll do it i'm just kidding um i'm gonna go
23:08look at my portrait charles entertain the troops
23:16are you married shuffles it's charles and my wife passed away a couple years ago oh i'm sorry that's a
23:25bummo tiny empanadas oh my god oh i don't want this sorry so how did your wife die julie 6 48 pm
23:42i'm right in the middle of plopping my next move will be to
23:46gotta go more later hello again hello again and again hello i i was uh i was wondering because i'm
23:58new whether or not you could just show me around campus a bit i would like that but first i have an
24:05errand to run keep me company yes solved it solved the case what case the case of why you would hire
24:19me when you hated me so much it didn't make sense and then it hit me you're playing a long game you
24:26want revenge so i went back to those employee files and i dug a little deeper turns out the guy with the
24:32public intoxication charge has a juvie record sealed marijuana possession you hire him find out about
24:41that blame me bad yelp reviews complaints to the state board come after me take me down that is your
24:48long game i'm right right julie that is the most delusional rant i have ever heard and i work in elder
24:57care two of the residents think i'm chita rivera then why did you hire me because i needed background
25:04checks and you're the only private investigator i know well that's exactly what you would say
25:10if you were trying to all right okay just listen this level of mistrust and paranoia is what we
25:17in the medical and psychological community refer to as cuckoo bananas maybe you should go to therapy
25:24and try to figure out what happened to you to make you like this oh i know exactly why i'm like this
25:32solved that case years ago yeah
25:54hey blade hey mona she was right over there oh this is charles hey charles hi blade i'm scared of
26:10blade don't be this place is great they get a lot of good stuff from columbia oh drums and musical
26:16instruments oh they use them to smuggle cocaine across the border oh i'm kidding
26:24charles you think that tuba is full of cocaine honestly i have no idea
26:31oh not bullet cocaine yeah i'll just take the tupa long story short because the department is broke
26:40i have to go looking for used instruments all over northern california bring them back here
26:45and refurbish them myself well it seems like a lot of extra work for a tenured professor
26:53what if the kid has always wanted to learn the tuba and she comes here she goes to the music
26:59department and there are no tubas and that makes her sad can't have sad kids can we
27:06let's just leave it here i'll take it inside in the morning no one's gonna no one's gonna steal it
27:15well not unless the unrefurbished tuba vanda escapes from sing sing but i don't think that's gonna happen
27:25i need to say something to you i met my late wife victoria right after grad school
27:32she passed away a couple of years ago and ever since um charles how old are you 76 i'm 74. we've both
27:47been through some right we both lost people we loved we've both been through periods of joy and tragedy
27:58we both opened for fleetwood mac at the royal albert hall but sorry metaphorically i mean mine was
28:08literal but my point is people our age have this whole complicated life behind us and we have
28:20god knows what ahead of us let's just be here now
28:42well that was certainly
28:50so
28:57since graduating in 1975 brad vinnick has achieved everything there is to achieve in the world of
29:04finance to celebrate those accomplishments we declare him this year's distinguished graduate and
29:10will hang his portrait here in the mildred wheeler historical gallery
29:20so
29:25oh my god
29:27oh my god
29:35oh
29:37oh
29:39oh
29:41oh
29:43oh
29:45oh
29:47oh
30:01oh
30:03oh
30:05oh
30:07oh
30:22oh
30:24oh
30:26oh
30:28oh
30:30oh
30:44oh
30:48oh
30:50oh
30:52oh
30:56oh
31:11oh
31:13oh
31:15oh
31:17oh
31:19oh
31:23oh
31:25oh
31:40oh
31:42oh
31:44oh
31:46oh
31:48oh
31:50oh
31:52oh
31:54oh
32:08oh
32:10oh
32:12oh
32:14oh
32:16oh
32:18oh
32:20oh
32:22oh
32:37oh
32:39oh
32:41oh
32:43oh
32:45oh
32:47oh
32:49oh
32:51oh
33:05oh
33:07oh
33:09oh
33:11oh
33:13oh
33:15oh
33:17oh
Be the first to comment
Add your comment