- 6 hours ago
Season 2 Episode 2 | Cinepack | 512x384 | 22m31s | 175 MB
girlsnextdoor reality playboy
girlsnextdoor reality playboy
Category
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TVTranscript
00:01I was telling Norma about a song. You want to hear it?
00:05Slop on your knob.
00:06Slop on my knob, lay corn on the cob.
00:09Check in with me and do your job.
00:12Lay on the bed and give me some head.
00:15Rub on my nuts, lick on my butt.
00:18It's so romantic.
00:20It's just like the Moon and June songs that I do up with.
00:30I'm gonna give you candy.
00:33Come on to my house, my house.
00:36I'm gonna give you figs and dits and grips and kicks.
00:42Ay!
00:43Come on to my house, my house, come on.
00:51Good morning, the Playboy Mansion. Can I help you?
00:55Popos!
00:59Today is the big day. It's Hef's 80th birthday party.
01:02It's a big deal to Hef, not only because it's a big round number,
01:05but because he's just really happy right now with everything that's going on in his life,
01:08so he wants to celebrate.
01:11I have neon tables, as will this piece.
01:14And the lights are presumably gonna supply a lot of color.
01:16The lights will supply a tremendous amount of color.
01:18Okay.
01:19I don't think you'll be disappointed with it.
01:20Very good.
01:21We sent out these great invitations that fold out, and there's like 10 different pictures of Hef through the years.
01:26So cool.
01:27So many celebrities at Hef's birthday party.
01:29And it's gonna be huge, because 36 Mafia is gonna perform, and there's a whole lot of other shit.
01:36It's gonna be bigger than usual. There's gonna be like a thousand people there, and I'm really excited about it.
01:42A big group of Playmates from the 70s were coming to Hef's 80th birthday party, so I decided to invite them up for a luncheon.
01:51So who's all coming? I need to look them up, because some of them I know, and some of them I don't.
01:55A few of the Playmates that were coming to my luncheon were girls I'd never met, so I looked them up in the Playmate book,
02:00which is kind of an index of any Playmate who was ever in Playboy.
02:03Some of the girls had such bad breast implants, they'd point all different directions.
02:07Some of them still do.
02:09I know.
02:10The biggest difference between Girls Who Pose Now and Girls Who Pose Then is what I call the fur bikini.
02:15I wonder if it was easier to pose nude back in the day when people had fur bikinis.
02:20Fur bikini.
02:25We're developing our own language, Mary.
02:32What?
02:33Hi, Mai.
02:34Hi, how you doing?
02:35So did you know what I'm doing for Hef's birthday?
02:38You got the picture, didn't you?
02:39The black and white thing?
02:40Last night, Holly gave Hef two white peacocks.
02:43Tonight, Bridget is jumping out of a cake, and I still have to give him my poster that I made him.
02:50It's just a picture of me holding a gun.
02:52It's black and white.
02:53And Hef's shadows in the background.
02:55I think you'll like it.
02:57Holly and Bridget are like, they have all these cool ideas.
03:02And I'm like, boring.
03:04I have more ears on you.
03:05So in five years, you'll have more ideas.
03:10Hello?
03:11Word.
03:14Okay.
03:15Is the truck already over there?
03:16The truck is already over there.
03:17Okay.
03:18Hank and I walked over to the other house because I had to go make sure that the cake got over here.
03:22And they got both parts of the cake because it comes apart in two pieces.
03:25And that was a little bit stressful.
03:27Hello.
03:28So, you figured out how we're going to do it?
03:29Yes.
03:30Okay.
03:31Okay.
03:34Will it fit?
03:35Fit that way?
03:36It has to go sideways.
03:37Yeah.
03:38Do you want to tilt that one too?
03:39Yeah.
03:40We have to take it out through that wave, right?
03:41Yep.
03:42Let's hope it stays together.
03:43Ooh.
03:44Okay, Wendy, let's follow.
03:45Wave goodbye.
03:46You'll never see it looking like this again.
03:47Dad!
03:48Whoa!
03:49Whoa!
03:50Whoa!
03:51Whoa!
03:52Whoa!
03:53Whoa!
03:54Whoa!
03:55Whoa!
03:56Whoa!
03:57Whoa!
03:58Whoa!
03:59Whoa!
04:00Whoa!
04:01Whoa!
04:02Whoa!
04:03Whoa!
04:04Whoa!
04:05Whoa!
04:06Whoa!
04:07Whoa!
04:08So, what's the deal with Hef's birthday?
04:11Do you want to come?
04:12Yes, I want to go.
04:14Oh, my God.
04:15Don't even say that, because I will not invite you.
04:17My mom always told me, Kendra, you promised me a party I can come to.
04:22I'm like, yeah, I did.
04:24But not this one, you know?
04:25Is it a lingerie party?
04:26Yes!
04:27It is?
04:28Duh!
04:29Lingerie or less?
04:32Is it really?
04:34That's why I don't want you to come!
04:36Why?
04:37Because you're going to see all these naked people.
04:39Like, I've never seen naked people before.
04:41All right, then.
04:42Oh, my goodness.
04:43All right, fine.
04:44What are you going to wear, then?
04:45I'll find a little teddy.
04:46Oh, hell no, my!
04:48I'll help you pick something out.
04:50Finally, we came to some agreement.
04:52I'm like, fine, you can come, you know?
04:55But I just don't want to see anything, like, less than a jersey and, like, really long shorts.
05:00Why?
05:01I've got to find myself a husband, so...
05:04Ugh!
05:05My God.
05:06You're home, right?
05:08I was really excited to have the Playmates from the 70s come up for lunch, because I've always heard so many crazy stories from back in the day, and I just wanted to see if they were true.
05:20Oh, cool!
05:21You know what I realized, Holly?
05:22What's that?
05:23That the first time I met Half, he was actually younger than I am now.
05:27Me, too.
05:28I thought the same thing.
05:29You did?
05:30I was like, that is so weird.
05:31I know.
05:32He was younger then than we are now.
05:33Isn't that sick?
05:34It wasn't.
05:35I'm so sorry.
05:36This group of women was put together by my friend Allison.
05:39I can order them around, no problem.
05:41When she was here in the 70s, they were all just really good friends, so it was kind of like a sorority coming together after all these years.
05:56Where's Sondra?
05:57Sondra!
05:58Well, I saved the seat for her by Heff if she wants it.
06:03Sondra!
06:04Sondra!
06:05Sondra!
06:06I was really excited to see Sondra Theodore because she was Heff's girlfriend in the 70s, so she's kind of my 70s counterpart.
06:12I don't look in the mirror, so I don't look in the mirror.
06:16I don't know who's in the mirror, so I don't look.
06:18I don't know who that is.
06:20Patty McGuire was my dad's favorite playmate in the 70s, so it was special to have her come to the luncheon.
06:26I was born in the year of the rabbit.
06:32Michelle Drake was a playmate, and her centerfold was out by the lions out front.
06:37You know how he keeps it warm in here?
06:39I don't know.
06:40How does he keep it warm in here?
06:41Marcy Hansen was another playmate in the 70s, and you have to see her centerfold because she's wearing like these clear plastic shorts.
06:47I was actually really encouraged when I saw all the ladies from the 70s because they all look amazing.
06:57So, whew, maybe there's hope for the future.
07:00When I used to hang with Tom Petty, he called this the house that Butts built.
07:06The girls were talking about everything, and I was asking them about Hef's birthday parties.
07:10I wore the t-shirt from the Olympics. They dug this out of storage.
07:13I won the vibrator.
07:14Now, this next event is the vibrator and ball relay.
07:19Go!
07:20That's the biggest guy I've ever seen.
07:33But the best part was that little girl that came out with the, uh, the naked lady.
07:39Oh, my.
07:40Yes.
07:41There's a picture that.
07:42She had these huge natural boobs, and when she would run, they'd kind of go like this.
07:47her boobs were bigger than my head do you bring pictures yeah awesome
08:04maybe like 20 years from now I'll be inviting Bridget and Kendra and we'll be like remember
08:19back when uh wait I forgot what I was saying I can't remember
08:34we had so much fun my god this man we wouldn't all be here
08:46and without you girls where would you be I've been in Chicago
08:52well it's not just a momentous occasion that we're all together but I mean come on
09:03this is a big birthday yeah we all have to be here for half I feel younger in heart and mind
09:10than when I was 60 without question you know the last handful of years are as good as as they get
09:18a lot of it has to do with Holly I was just gonna say you're sweet Puffin
09:24how do you say cheeseburger in French I have fun getting ready for the big parties here Bridget's
09:43room is kind of the headquarters for party preparation the hairdresser comes and sets up
09:48in there and if anybody gets their makeup done they usually get it done in there I'm really
09:55excited right now that means I might have to masturbate before the party so I don't get like
09:59great Bridget's room your mom just arrived what she's in the great hall well I have to go put my vibrator
10:12away holy cow what do you want me to say oh my god she came up with all this makeup on I've never
10:27seen her with makeup on in my life never you can't have dark lipstick on like that why because why
10:33because what she has dark lipstick on that she has no why remember you're taken I'm not oh bye
10:42thank you so bad yeah did you know yeah what you got fake what so mom's gonna have some ta-tas
10:54what these cutlets those real cutlet things what's that what Anastasia got like those things that
10:59Anastasia had oh my god you have to try them on these are weird holy shit they make a difference look
11:09yay I just feel so much better about myself welcome to the playboy mansion my no I didn't take one
11:19honey she did one oh Kendra you're bad oh come on man oh Kendra's way overprotective of her mom
11:27come on her mom needs to let go a little bit and forget Kendra what are you guys wearing what are
11:32you wearing sweats I'm wearing sweats your mom what are you wearing on the sweats I don't believe
11:39her she's not gonna wear sweats I know that for a fact let's go to the bathroom real quick
11:43I snuck in my room when she wasn't looking and I went in her bag this is my mom's
11:52no uh-uh my mom's not gonna wear this uh-uh I'm hiding it
12:02hef has been an editor for over 50 years so when the parties roll around he's got to peek at
12:17everything and make sure it's exactly right he's a bit of a perfectionist a bit of stickler for detail
12:24very good
12:30it was a peacock themed weekend I gave half white peacocks for his birthday and for the last three
12:47years I've been seeing you know peacocks shed feathers on our property and I thought I wonder
12:54what it would look like if somebody made me a peacock outfit love those colors yeah it's so
12:59pretty just when you think you're creative Bridget and Holly come along it's weird to get dressed when
13:08you know you're just gonna take everything off I don't know how to wrap that oh I want to see
13:13there's my posters right there how am I supposed to wrap that Maya what am I supposed to do where's
13:18your wrapping paper me wrap it in my little closet thing okay do you like it I'm supposed to frame
13:23it he said I'm supposed to frame it and I don't have a frame I'll go down and get tape and wrap it do you
13:30have a frame I gotta find wrapping paper and wrap this present we're talking about Kendra here
13:37where the heck's our underwear oh here we go look you're very resourceful Sally where's the
13:50underwear oh what do you want something prettier where did you find it in the bottom drawer
13:56put it in my bag put it in my that little shit I can't believe it oh my god when it was time to
14:19give half my present I was really nervous I mean Holly's and Bridget's present were like the bomb
14:25hey mr. Hefner oh my god I feel very disciplined happy birthday honey thank you darling and here's
14:38your present for me oh my goodness I knew it I knew that half of love the poster oh wonderful playboy
14:50I had to get a frame I didn't have time to get a frame I see that Kendra got top billing
15:04I gave myself the top billing because you know I paid 500 bucks for that shit
15:13when it was finally time for the party we all went downstairs oh my god I'm nervous
15:23better watch out I'll whoop you
15:28when I saw my mom with everything on I was like wow it actually really does look good it's not bad
15:38you know if she gets out of line you'll equip her I will believe me I don't really have any
15:55responsibilities at Hef's parties so I'm just kind of there doing my thing but I do like to hang out
16:01with Hef a lot I'm kind of a mini hostess of the parties you know people come up and they want to say
16:07hi to Hef and I always want to greet them too but I'm celebrity shy at the same time like I'm
16:12always scared to talk to celebrities that's more Kendra's thing
16:15I totally want my mom to have fun and enjoy her life but I can't see her settling down with all the way Ray
16:37you listen to me when I talk to you
16:48there were so many celebrities that have birthday party Donald Trump and his daughter Ivanka Reggie
17:03Miller was there and Sean Elway and Paris Hilton even sang a little song
17:12happy birthday Mr. Hefner happy birthday to you
17:23three six mafia I love three six mafia I used to listen to them back in the day
17:31you know I'm a ghetto fab girl
17:43it will certainly always be our song
17:47slob on your mouth
17:48I know
17:49that's our song that's our song that's our song that's our song
17:53that's our song
17:54we're ready when you are
17:56happy birthday Hef
18:02I'm here to introduce y'all to the Academy of World Winners
18:08three six mafia
18:10love
18:11yeah
18:15yeah
18:17yeah
18:19yeah
18:20yeah
18:21yeah
18:22yeah
18:23yeah
18:24yeah
18:25yeah
18:26yeah
18:27yeah
18:28yeah
18:29yeah
18:30yeah
18:32yeah
18:33yeah
18:34Kdub in the house
18:35the three six mafia performance was really cool there were all these girls up there dancing on stage it looked like a rap video
18:42I would be in the group they asked me
18:48I would I'd be their white chick
18:55so we're sitting there watching three six mafia and I was getting really nervous because I knew that my turn was coming
19:01and I'd jump in and I felt them roll me out
19:03happy birthday to you
19:08happy birthday to you
19:09happy birthday dear friend
19:14happy birthday to you
19:18oh my god okay are my boobs in is everything tucked in is everything right and the three six mafia kept yelling
19:26Oh my gosh
19:27Oh my god
19:28but I'm like I can't hear my song
19:30so I just popped
19:31I kept my eyes directly focused on Hef because this was his birthday present, but every once
19:50in a while when I would walk around the cake, all I could see was just a sea of people.
20:01Take it all!
20:29It was like the perfect weekend, it was the best weekend ever.
20:49Hef said to me that his 80th birthday party was the best party he's ever had, and it's
20:54cool to be a part of that because he's had so many great parties.
20:57Happy Birthday to you!
21:04Ever since I've been with Hef, things have just kept getting better and better, and if
21:08this birthday weekend is any indication as to what this year is going to be like, I'm
21:14in for a hell of a year.
21:16I love you.
21:17I love you.
21:18I love you.
21:19Big time.
21:20Big time.
21:21All my heart.
21:27Big time.
21:28Big time.
21:30Bye.
21:31Big time.
21:32Big time.
21:33What?
21:34Come on to my house.
21:36Come on to my house, my house
21:39I'm gonna give you cigs and dits and grips and kicks
21:45Come on to my house, my house, come on
21:49Come on to my house, my house, come on
21:52Come on to my house, my house, come on
21:56Come on to my house, my house, come on
22:00Come on, come on
22:03Oh, my God.
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