MAFS UK It's Official! Season 3 Episode 7

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Transcript

00:00We're nearing the end of the experiment. John and Abigail are closer than ever. He even felt

00:12comfortable enough to share some very personal information with her. I've never had a wee. He

00:18must be busting. Leo's been thinking about starting a new career as a food critic after

00:24the experiment is over. And there was a huge revelation on Homestays when Stephen finally

00:33told Nelly his favourite sceptre track. I'm Lucinda Light and this is MAPS UK. It's official.

00:48Our couples have done their partner swaps and we're in the middle of Homestays.

00:52Our newlyweds marriages will hinge upon how this week goes as they get their first taste

00:59of life outside the experiment. Nelly will be here later in the show to tell us about the

01:04shocking revelation that made her take off her wedding ring. But first, to help me debrief

01:11everything we've seen this week, it's the hilarious Russell Kane.

01:15So how are you finding this season of MAPS? It's so addictive and riveting because I love

01:24analysing relationships and I love looking at the different languages that men and women

01:31speak to communicate their, and women and women and men and men obviously in this series,

01:36to communicate their pleasure to each other. And I like seeing if people's emotional intelligence

01:42can override some of those knee-jerk reactions. I tell you what else is interesting as well,

01:48to any women or men watching this, we've got a few couples where the woman or the, I think

01:55it's just women in this series, but it could be a man going, I'm really sorry, I keep kicking

01:58off. It's obviously, I was cheated on in the past, so that's why I don't trust you. Listen

02:03to me. As soon as you're with someone who is totally trustworthy, you're normally not paranoid.

02:08For example, in Lee and Leah, and she's like, I'm so sorry, you know, it's me, you've got

02:12to understand, I've got to hang up to my previous relationship.

02:15My balls are out.

02:15It's like, hang on a second. She was out last night. She was flirting. She was being slightly

02:21inappropriate. She was crossing boundaries. So be careful dismissing your gut. It's not

02:28that someone's cheating.

02:29Yes.

02:30But it's not going to encourage trust. If you're like, your lips look dead kissable,

02:35you know, you've ever kissed a girl and all that. I'd be fucking furious if Lindsay was

02:38some geezer saying that.

02:39Yeah.

02:40I'd be kicking off.

02:41Absolutely.

02:41My nuts would be hanging out like on a Tudor spike at the front of our garden.

02:45Now, I do want to get to know you a little bit better, and I know you've got an absolutely

02:49divine partner. You are married, children, the whole lot. But if you were married at first

02:56side, starting again, what would be your complete package?

03:00I would choose a woman who's got a great relationship with her father.

03:07Yeah.

03:07Because I've noticed a slight link over time between shite relationship with the father

03:12and Glenn Close behaviour.

03:14But I feel the same about the respective man that I'm with. Do they love their mama? Do

03:20they have a deep, dear respect for the main woman in their life? Because you can bet your

03:25bottom dollar that translates. What would your dream wedding ceremony be?

03:30Well, the way Lindsay and I did it, we got married abroad in like rural Spain. It's purely

03:37so we could laminate the placard. I would invite you, but it's a small ceremony abroad.

03:42You anote.

03:43Yeah.

03:43Good for you.

03:44So small, intimate, all about connection with people you truly love and know.

03:50That will be there for the lifetime.

03:51And somewhere warm. So that's why we did it. We were in rural Andalusia. It was a beautiful

03:55ceremony.

03:56So you wouldn't change a thing.

03:57I don't think so.

03:58How beautiful. Where would you want to go on your honeymoon?

04:02So we drove across America, coast to coast for our honeymoon, visiting.

04:05But if I was going to do it again, I like all types of holiday, if you like. So I like

04:10both, you know, all inclusive, like Maldives, pile of books. But I also, I love exploring.

04:16I've got a Hillary holiday with my backpack. Here's some ancient pottery. But I also like

04:21having it massive. I like raving. I love house music. I love dancing. So I think I would

04:25like to do five days partying in Ibiza and then straight to some Indian Ocean Island to recover.

04:32Now I've really got to know you. Let's talk about our other couples. So after the shock

04:37wave from last week's retreat, we've said goodbye to a couple of couples. We've said goodbye to

04:42Maeve and Jo and Davani and Julia Ruth. So let's start with April and Leo. April's really not

04:49feeling still a connection with Leo. Leo sort of declared that he is putting everything into

04:55this relationship that he possibly can. And April's mum said, Leo definitely is not your man.

05:02But Leo's mum was a bit more encouraging. She said, come on, mate, you know, just give it a go.

05:07There's still a window there and there could be a possibility. But what are your thoughts on these

05:12two? Well, a wise sage, Paul C. Brunson once said to me, there's only one reason you break up with

05:20someone. The only reason you split up, and I thought, no, there's multiple reasons. No, there's only one.

05:23You met the wrong person. And you meet the wrong, these are his words, I'm quoting the master.

05:30You meet the wrong person because your self-esteem and self-love is not high enough. So once it gets

05:36high enough, there's like a wall, and you might be single for a bit longer, but no one gets over it.

05:41But if you're sort of like, oh, just settling, it just won't work. There's nothing wrong with either

05:47of these two people. They are just not compatible. They're not in the same frequency, are they?

05:53They're just a different resonance. He's a lovely bloke, but she's clearly more interested in

05:57cerebral things. You could see the horror when, was it him that didn't know the meaning of the

06:02word tactile? Yes. And it seems like just a silly thing, but that would have been a massive turn

06:08off for her. She clearly appreciates a guy that is dexterous with language. Yes. With a bit of sense

06:15of humour and banter. Yeah. I think his sense of humour comes in a different way, tea towels and

06:20tricks and eating competitions. There's nothing wrong with this guy. He's a lovely bloke. He'd be my

06:25mate. I've got mates like him. But she's a woman that needs her brain as well as everything else

06:31stimulated. It's sad because they're both amazing humans. Absolutely. And he's got my

06:36target hairstyle. Oh, I love him a lot. Maybe his love language is more physical, so he needs

06:41to be with a woman that doesn't need to verbalise and analyse everything. And it can be about

06:44touch and connection that way. The good old love language. We've got to know. What's your

06:49love language? I speak all of them. You're fluent in all love languages? Same. I mean, it's

06:53not Greek, is that? No. I look at that one and the one Spock speaks as well. We've got to

06:57be fluent in all the love languages. I 100% agree. No, I think,

07:00unsurprisingly, as a needy stand-up comedian, I do like a verbal praise. You're definitely

07:06fluent in verbal diarrhoea. Yeah, definitely. I love that about you. I need to take emotional

07:11Imodium just to buy myself. Let's talk about Rebecca and Bailey, shall we? So in the preview,

07:17we saw Rebecca's mum say, look, I want you to be happy, but in Liverpool. I think they're

07:24both just going, wow, we really like each other, but how the hell is this going to work out,

07:30logistically and geographically? I think the mistake is to start analysing and worrying

07:35about what happens next until you've had a go of just doing life and seeing what happens.

07:40Because Lindsay and I, there's no way she was going to leave all her friends in Manchester

07:44and there was no way I was going to leave the South in Essex, but it does work out.

07:47You find your rhythm.

07:48I hope you're listening to this, Bailey and Rebecca, because we have got a fantastic example

07:53in you and Lindsay.

07:54Correct.

07:55Yeah. And it can, you know, it's not like it's Australia and England.

07:58Love, without sounding cheesy, love finds a way.

08:01I agree. And I really wish them well. Let's talk about Grace and Ashley. The experts told

08:07them to stop scorekeeping. There's a lot of defensiveness and they're just speaking a bit

08:14of a different language here. How has it felt for you to watch?

08:18Yeah, it's a very dangerous thing to be in the right. And what's interesting is I don't

08:23think Grace is necessarily, well, everything she's saying is valid, but she's not hearing

08:28what's coming back. It's a one way communication. I'm not saying he's necessarily receiving it

08:34properly either.

08:35Because he's not toxic.

08:36No.

08:36He really isn't. He's a lovely fellow.

08:39But neither is carbon and neither is oxygen. But put them in the wrong combination. You

08:45get carbon monoxide and everyone dies. Okay. So when they mix their personalities together,

08:51it's toxic.

08:52Yeah, right.

08:53But separate, they're amazing people.

08:55It's not looking good for them. Watch this space.

08:58Now for our other couples, Leigh was worried about Leigh crossing her boundaries by flirting

09:03with Leigh during partner spot week. But after a relaxing stay in Liverpool, Leigh thanked

09:08Leigh for being patient with her trust issues. Kira and David told the experts that every

09:14day is like a honeymoon when they're together. Abigail and John had an emotional reunion with

09:20his family in Wales. John's mum said she had never seen him this happy. And Nellie, well,

09:26she took off her wedding ring after a dramatic revelation from her flatmate. And she will be

09:32here very soon to tell us all about it.

09:51Welcome back to Maths UK. It's official and it is time for our dental appointment. The gorgeous

09:57Nellie is here.

09:58Yeah. What do you think, Nellie?

10:00A 10-10. Gorgeous.

10:02And how about, Russ, over here?

10:04I don't know. There's not an ounce of gingivitis on you.

10:07Thank you. I recognise flirting when I hear it.

10:09There we go.

10:11Let's just go back to the start. So you had the most iconic arrival in that dolly that

10:18I've ever seen in Maths. How about you, Russ? How was the dolly arrival?

10:21Well, because of me, I would have been jealous. I would have wanted to arrive in a similar,

10:25the male version of that.

10:26It was divine. And of course, on the day you said that it was a match made in heaven between

10:31you and Stephen. What drew you in so quickly to him?

10:35Honestly, I think it sounds really cheesy, but when I went down the aisle, I started to

10:39get a bit nervous. And I just kind of felt really calm. He just seemed really reassuring.

10:43He was quite sure of himself. And I think, I mean, I find confidence really attractive.

10:47Yeah. And yeah, I just, I can't even explain it. It was just a feeling.

10:52So on the honeymoon, you said it was too good to be true. Now, looking back now, how was

10:58Stephen's behaviour different from the honeymoon to the apartments?

11:02I honestly, I couldn't figure it out. I think I was so confused. I was thinking you were

11:07the dream man. And, you know, he said himself that where, where had I been 34 years of his

11:12life? And I think when it, when I got to the apartments, I was just so confused. And I

11:15thought, what in the world is going on? And then obviously he had some issues at home

11:21that he had to sort out. So I kind of, for a while I was excusing it to that. And I thought

11:25I need to be patient because I'm not a very patient person. Yeah. It was a really strange

11:30switch up.

11:31I've been at once.

11:32Yeah. Very confusing.

11:33But you were giving the grace and the space to go and look, I'm not going to take this

11:37personally. You've got stuff going down.

11:39A hundred percent. The old me would have just blocked and deleted. But I just thought, no,

11:42that's not what I'm here for. I'm here to be open and try something out. So I wanted

11:46to give it my all.

11:47And I mean, that's what this experiment's about.

11:49Yeah.

11:49We know dentists love their patients and you did really well.

11:52Oh, thanks guys.

11:54Ba-boom.

11:55You're so good at this world.

11:56I know, it's so quick.

11:56Can I get a fire extinguisher? Because I just caught fire.

12:01And you, of course, you asked Stephen and fair enough to reassure you, what, what, why

12:08were you feeling so insecure? Was it just the fact that he wasn't giving you any assurance

12:13at all?

12:14I mean, I think obviously a part of it will go down to my past, but I came in a very self-assured

12:19and confident woman and I wasn't insecure on the honeymoon.

12:23That's the point I was making earlier. Like, particularly women are quick to say, well, I

12:27was cheating on my past, I'm insecure. So how come she weren't insecure in the honeymoon?

12:30Exactly.

12:30There's obviously something in his behaviour that reactivated that wound in you.

12:35Yeah. He wasn't making you feel safe.

12:38Was it overnight or was it gradual for a week or was it, you know, was there a moment?

12:42It was when we got back to the apartment. Do you know what it is? It was so secure on

12:46the honeymoon, fine, completely okay. And like you said, then Stephen started blowing hot

12:50and cold and I was thinking, what in the world is going on? And then, yeah, it opened up all

12:54deep wounds and I started blaming myself and thinking that I'm the problem.

12:58Would you say you were falling in love on the honeymoon or would you think it was more

13:02like a physical chemistry that didn't blossom into love on his part, but did more so on

13:08your part? That can happen sometimes. You can really fancy something. You can have this

13:12physical intimacy period and you're like, for whatever reason, the love bit just doesn't

13:15follow. Sometimes there's no explanation.

13:17Yeah, you're right. I think on the honeymoon, there obviously was a physical attraction,

13:21but I did actually start to fall for him as we saw on that first dinner party where I cried.

13:26And I think, yeah, normally I would never go that fast. I'd be like, well, take a step back. But I

13:33just was like, no, go with it. Don't self-sabotage. If you are having a good time and he is interested

13:38in you, just enjoy it.

13:39Yeah.

13:39So that's what I was just trying to do.

13:41You were just surrendering with the flow.

13:42Yeah. I was like, let me go with the flow. If he wants to love all over me, then I'll enjoy it.

13:47And again, what people don't understand.

13:49Can't delete that image.

13:51You know, you're there with each other day in, day out. So it's such a crash course.

13:56Yeah.

13:56And it's such an express lane, isn't it? With each other.

13:59Yeah.

14:00And so people do fall quickly.

14:01Yeah.

14:01Or fall out quickly.

14:03Yeah.

14:03One or the other.

14:04Did you ever get the impression he was ever emotionally falling for you a little bit

14:07or was there never any?

14:09I think at the time I started to think that, but having watched some of it back, I'm a bit

14:13like, oh, actually maybe he wasn't. And maybe I was trying to see something that maybe wasn't

14:20actually there, but because I was so hopeful, maybe I was really trying to cling on to that.

14:25I wonder why. How old is he?

14:2734.

14:28Some men just take 44, he'll probably be ready. Some of them, honestly, some of them are slow.

14:33I know.

14:34I know some men are living, you know, in a single flat above a takeaway. The girlfriend is

14:39still a sock. They're 45 years old and they're like, maybe I have lost my weight.

14:43Like, it can take half a century for some men to go, yeah, I'm lonely.

14:49Yeah.

14:49But why? I don't get it. Like, surely do you not, like, with men, do they not just want

14:53to have that kind of person?

14:55Some of them, it takes longer.

14:56Yeah.

14:57They grow their empathy at retirement.

14:59Yeah. In the nursing. There's still some of them in the nursing home, dirty old bastards.

15:02With a bucket of blue pills. It might be Beryl, it might be Vera. I'm going to smash

15:07them both for fun. Some of them never grow up.

15:10Yeah, I feel like some actually maybe don't.

15:12Well, look, I think it's a bit of a human thing. I'm not even sure if it's a gender

15:16thing.

15:16Maybe not.

15:17There's plenty of females out there as well.

15:20So what was the turning point when you realised you should and couldn't be treated much better

15:25by Stephen?

15:27Honestly, it was partner swap. When I had Bailey, I had my big brother Bailey in, honestly.

15:31It's, I walked in and I thought, no, this is exactly what my past relationships have been

15:37like. This is what is a relationship. What I was getting wasn't that. And I think I just

15:42got so carried away in the bubble and I kind of accepted things I would never accept in

15:45the real world.

15:46But God bless Bailey to show you the way it is, what you deserve.

15:50Yeah. I'm glad he really reminded me of, Nels, this is what it should be like to be in a really

15:55fulfilling relationship, which I wasn't getting.

15:57Do you think with the Julia Roof thing that she was a genuine threat to the relationship

16:02or do you think it was past traumas sort of coming up and revealing themselves that she

16:08activated?

16:09It was when Maeve and Kia told me off camera in between the commitment ceremony that she

16:14wanted to get him for partner swap so that she could maybe see if it would work. And I

16:18just thought, this is not what this show is. That's what hurt me. You can choose him.

16:21Like, the whole choosing him for the sexiest husband, that's fine. I find him sexy. I

16:26also chose another husband.

16:28Still now?

16:30But yeah, I think it was more just, I think I felt a little bit betrayed because we were

16:35quite close, especially when she had my back. I rated her for that. Really rated her.

16:39I was like, thank you so much. Like, this is what friendship is about.

16:43Absolutely. I really rated her in that moment too.

16:46I think I just felt a bit blindsided by it. And then, yeah, obviously, you know, Stephen

16:50been blowing hot and cold. And I think because that week, that was our good week, we'd worked

16:54hard to get back to that. I was doing anything I could to protect it. When maybe I should,

16:59you know, maybe not that maybe I shouldn't have, but I just was like, no, no, we finally

17:02got back here. I want to, I've got honeymoon Stephen back. I need to try and.

17:05Yeah, let's protect him.

17:05Yeah.

17:06Yeah.

17:07You know, the fierce mama came out.

17:08Yeah.

17:09Stay away.

17:09Yeah, damn.

17:10From my husband.

17:11Damn.

17:12Standing your sacred ground.

17:14I promise you, if he'd been giving you what you need.

17:16I'd been fine.

17:16You'd be like, go and have a nice day with her. Flirt of her if you like.

17:18Oh, you'd be so secure. You would not give a solitary fuck.

17:21100%.

17:21So true, Rance.

17:23100%.

17:23At home stays your incredible friend, may I say, Lucy.

17:28Amazing, isn't she?

17:29She dropped the bombshell.

17:30I shit myself, I wasn't even Stephen.

17:32Yeah, no, listen, you don't want to mess with Lucy.

17:34She was like Poirot with a little moustache. One more question. Why have you been swiping?

17:39Honestly, she's amazing.

17:40What a friend.

17:41I know.

17:42I'm lucky.

17:42And just, you know, she's like, look in the mirror, buddy.

17:44Today.

17:45It's happened this morning.

17:46It's the final piece of evidence.

17:48Yes.

17:49What an investigator. What a friend. What a rally. That's exactly what you wanted.

17:52She was like Pussy Poirot.

17:53Yeah, honestly, she really is.

17:56And I'm sure it was an utter shock and quite hurtful, but were you glad that she revealed

18:01her in that moment?

18:02Yeah, absolutely.

18:03Yeah, she meant business.

18:04She meant business.

18:04Yeah, she'd come straight from work and she was like, no, I...

18:07It's like, you know when Superman doesn't even put his cape on, he just knocks someone

18:09out.

18:10Isn't that awesome? It wasn't about her. It was just self-sacrificial. Like, I'm just sharpening

18:14up the elbows. I'm here for Nellie. Get out of my way. Look at this, buddy.

18:18Genuinely, yeah.

18:18At the commitment ceremony, both Maeve and Devani said how important it was, the friendship

18:24of the other brides and grooms. How important was that support for you to get you through

18:29the experiment?

18:30Honestly, if it wasn't for the cast, I wouldn't have been able to do it. I wouldn't. Like,

18:34those girls were everything. And even, like, Bailey, you know, I did partner swap with him.

18:39He was an incredible friend to me throughout the whole experiment. I was super close to

18:42Beck and Bailey anyway. But, like, David, Kia, Leah, like, Grace, everyone, Maeve, we were

18:49so close. And it was just nice because sometimes I would second-guess myself. And they'd be like,

18:53no, back yourself, Nellie, you can do this. You are right. I think sometimes I need someone

18:57to tell, if I want to do something, I'm like, am I being insane? And I needed them to say,

19:02no, you're fine, sis. Go for it.

19:04It takes a village sometimes, doesn't it?

19:06Yeah.

19:06Just to get right behind you. And it feels like such a special cast, actually, this year.

19:12I've fallen in love with so many of you all.

19:14We're so close.

19:15So we're going to play a bit of a game. Russell and I have got some scenarios here.

19:19And we want you to tell us which bride or groom would be the best person in this situation

19:26and why.

19:28OK, fun.

19:29OK.

19:29Yeah.

19:30Just get my cards up.

19:32It's quite in there, quite tight. There we are.

19:35One I prepared earlier.

19:36Do you want to kick us off, France?

19:38Yes. So you're wearing a goat mask at an orgy.

19:41No, it's not.

19:42I was ready to answer it.

19:44I know you were.

19:44Yeah, which one?

19:46You missed out, Steve. Mug.

19:51Your flight is delayed and you're stuck on the runway for 12 hours.

19:55Yes. Who are you going to choose?

19:58I would say either Beck or Leah.

20:00OK.

20:01Yeah, it's just girl time.

20:02Yeah, just girl time that we have anyway.

20:04Good answer.

20:04Yeah.

20:05You're assembling flat pack furniture.

20:08Oh, God. I hate that.

20:10Beck.

20:10Oh, is Beck the most G.I. Jane?

20:12Yeah.

20:12She puts up shelves, all of that.

20:15Yeah.

20:16You're lost in a foreign city with no phone battery.

20:19I'd probably go Kia.

20:21Because if we were lost, we would just go to a bar.

20:24Yeah.

20:24How about if you've got 24 hours to raise £1 million?

20:30Ooh.

20:31Leah.

20:32That's a good one.

20:33The most resourceful.

20:34Yeah, business savvy, that girl.

20:36Yeah, straight away.

20:37Interesting.

20:38You have food poisoning.

20:41That's horrible.

20:42There's a couple the first time that happens.

20:44Who are you going to have food poisoning?

20:45If you breach those...

20:46Do you know what?

20:47Lindsay and I have been together 11 years.

20:48We've never breached that intimacy threshold.

20:51You've never pooed in front of each other?

20:52Never.

20:53No barley belly together.

20:54I will not.

20:55I just refuse to...

20:57It's not necessary, is it?

20:58You know when you see couples where one's in the bath...

21:01And the door's open.

21:01...and the other's on the toilet giving like a poo sauna to the person in the bath?

21:05If I saw...

21:06If I was with a woman...

21:07I have been guilty of that.

21:07If I saw someone's poo eyes, you know when they're like,

21:10I've had a great night.

21:11Oh, that's it.

21:12It's over.

21:12All the sex appeal down the toilet.

21:14I could not deal with poo eyes of someone I'm intimate with.

21:17But why do you...

21:18I don't fart.

21:18I also don't...

21:18I would never fart in front of my wife.

21:21Ever.

21:21I'm not into that either.

21:22I'd go for Grace.

21:24Oh, Grace.

21:24Yeah, very caring, very midwifery, you know.

21:27She'd look after me.

21:28She'd make sure I'd be okay.

21:29That's a good choice.

21:30This one's a bit of a strange one, but why not?

21:32You're going to space.

21:34Oh.

21:35Oh.

21:35Who are you going to do your astronauting with?

21:38My astronaut?

21:39Who are you going to get astronauty with?

21:41I'm going to say Maeve.

21:42She'd be so entertaining.

21:43Oh, would she?

21:44So entertaining.

21:46Yeah, I felt her would float up outside.

21:47I've changed my mind.

21:50I've changed my mind.

21:52Great answers, Nellie.

21:53How good was that?

21:54That was good.

21:55Now, let's have a little commitment ceremony

21:57and see if you guys want to stay or leave.

22:00And be on us.

22:01Always.

22:05All right.

22:06How about you go first over there, Russell?

22:08It's obviously with a slight measles lesion.

22:11A stay.

22:12Oh, yeah.

22:15Russell Kate wants to stay.

22:16Just to be clear, is that a commitment for more work or not?

22:20Just to be clear, is it contracting?

22:21How about you, Nellie?

22:22I've had the best time and it's been wonderful meeting you guys.

22:25So, 100%.

22:27Stay with loads of love hearts.

22:30Stephen never got these love hearts on.

22:32I do want to say, how dare you?

22:34How dare you be so gorgeous?

22:36Truly.

22:37How dare you?

22:38I should have put my factor 50 on because I'm getting sunburned.

22:40Oh, stop.

22:43Thanks so much, Russell and Nellie, for joining me here today.

22:47As homestays continue, our couples will find out

22:50how life might look on the outside of the experiment

22:53as we get closer and closer to the final vows.

22:57Join me next week with Paul C. Brunson

22:59and another one of our newlyweds to discuss it all.

23:03I'm going to go and ask Leo to show me that trick

23:07with the tea towel again.

23:08That was very impressive.

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