00:00Did you ever get the impression that a person who seemed sweet was, in fact, using you as a pawn?
00:05Today, we are going to uncover the stealthy methods of narcissistic people who belong to the same category as wolves in sheep's clothing and who may be, quietly draining your happiness.
00:16Hello, everyone. I'm really pleased to have you back on the channel.
00:19Covert narcissists are not only the most manipulative people, but also the ones with the most sophisticated methods of disguise.
00:26They might be the most modest and least attention-seeking person living discreetly, and yet no one would be the wiser.
00:33On the contrary, they are regarded as shy, gentle, or even ill.
00:37But this acting skill only masks the same me-me-me mindset, that all narcissism and its even more obvious forms manifest.
00:44To validly characterize a covert narcissist, let's examine the six main signs that could be very helpful.
00:50Tactic number one, the guilt trip.
00:52People who lay guilt trips on, others are really good at making you feel that it is your fault.
00:58They have the bad feelings or problems.
01:00Some of the phrases they might use are, I guess I'll just suffer alone, or must be nice.
01:05To only think about yourself, the latter.
01:08Being the case when you prioritize your own needs.
01:11This way of handling emotions works, because good people generally do not want to cause others' pain, and so manipulators take advantage of that.
01:19Little by little, you will find yourself saying yes to things you would rather not do just because you want to get away from that horrible feeling of guilt.
01:28Keep in mind that putting limits does not imply that you are a selfish person.
01:31It is an indication of good health.
01:33Tactic number two, gaslighting.
01:36Gaslighting can be defined as a form of psychological manipulation where the perpetrator tries to confuse the victim and make them doubt their own judgment.
01:44The manipulator may deny outright that they ever said the things that you heard, or they may even say that you are crazy for getting upset.
01:52The goal of this tactic is to cloud your mind with doubts about your memory, perception, and even your sanity.
01:58Slowly, you will stop trusting yourself and will start believing in the reality created by the manipulator.
02:04If you very often feel perplexed, or if you question your own judgment in the presence of someone, it is possible that gaslighting is taking place.
02:12Tactic number three, love bombing, then withdrawing.
02:17From the very beginning, love bombers will bombard you with their love, presents, and attention.
02:22Just the moment you are caught up in that marvelous feeling, they will turn suddenly to be aloof, cold, or even critical.
02:29You will be puzzled trying to understand what has changed, and will blame yourself and work hard to regain their approval.
02:35This will result in an emotional rollercoaster, where you are addicted to the highs and at the same time terrified of the lows.
02:42A healthy love is steady and consistent, not a manipulative cycle of extremes.
02:46Tactic number four, playing the victim.
02:49The victim never accepts the blame for anything they do wrong.
02:52When you bring up a problem that they caused, they will turn it around, and all of a sudden, they are the ones suffering.
02:58Before you know it, you are the one comforting them and apologizing for raising your legitimate concern in the first place.
03:05This tactic not only deflects all responsibility onto others, but also trains you to remain silent and not bring up issues at all.
03:12Be on the lookout for people who are always prepared with a sob.
03:16Story as soon as they are challenged.
03:19Tactic number five, triangulation.
03:21Triangulation involves dragging in a third party to your conflict with the intention of making you feel wrong and outnumbered.
03:28The one doing the manipulation would go as far as to assert that other people are on their side by using phrases like everyone thinks you're being unreasonable or I talked to your mom and she agrees with me.
03:41This trick cuts you off from others and makes you believe that the problem is your fault, not theirs.
03:46Most of the time, the third parties involved did not say anything like what the manipulator claims or the condition was misrepresented to them.
03:54Their dispute is solely between them and you.
03:56No one's opinion should be turned into a weapon against you.
04:00Signed number six.
04:01They are akin to leeches.
04:02There is no getting around the fact that any topic will always come back to them and their issues.
04:07They will practically hold your hand and guide you through the process of getting engaged until you get the feeling that they are interested in you.
04:16But then they will snatch the focus again with an even bigger and more important issue.
04:20In case a person that you know presents multiple signs, then possibly you are facing the situation of a covert narcissist.
04:27Be alert that the first step is to recognize it.
04:30The second one is to set positive limits.
04:32In some cases, limited contact or total separation.
04:35Might be the only way to ensure your health and safety.
04:38What's your story with covert narcissism?
04:40Share your experience in the comments section below.
04:43If this video has been helpful to you, please like it and subscribe to our channel.
04:48For more content on mental health, protection and healthy relationship building.
04:52Take care till the next time.
04:54You deserve relationships that support you rather than those that sap your energy.
04:58Thank you for your time.
04:59You might also want to watch our other videos.
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