Haul.Out.The.Halloween

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00:00:00For those of you who have had the pleasure of visiting Evergreen Lane, you know what

00:00:11I mean when I say this is the most festive street in America.

00:00:15And for those of you who have never had the chance to visit us, fret not, because you

00:00:19are about to see a street that carries the spirit of the holidays all year round.

00:00:24Normally this cul-de-sac is the center of all neighborhood activity, but today, we all

00:00:30had a previous engagement.

00:00:33There has never been a more deserving bride and groom than you and Jared.

00:00:36I love you guys so much.

00:00:38Thank you for being my bridesmaids.

00:00:39I'm so lucky.

00:00:40Don't make me cry before the vows.

00:00:42Not cool, Emily.

00:00:45And before I use this for myself, I hand embroidered it.

00:00:50Something new and something blue, so it counts as two.

00:00:54This is beautiful.

00:00:55I am so honored that you borrowed my old tiara and veil.

00:01:00I wore it when I was Snow Queen at college.

00:01:03I'm the one that's honored.

00:01:05It's gorgeous.

00:01:08You look spectacular.

00:01:11You really do.

00:01:13Can you believe the Johnsons won't be here?

00:01:15Hey, now.

00:01:16No need to talk about they who have left the lane.

00:01:18And you didn't need to make him a groomsman in absentia.

00:01:21Why do you care that he's an honorary groomsman?

00:01:23You are my best man.

00:01:26That's why you're here with me on the most important day of my life.

00:01:29You, me, and Bob.

00:01:31Hey, we're all out of Vienna sausages.

00:01:34No, no.

00:01:35The charcuterie is for the groom.

00:01:37I was a groom once.

00:01:38It's okay.

00:01:39I'm far too nervous to eat.

00:01:40Maybe I've got something that could help.

00:01:44Homemade Bavarian mead made with honey from my very own apiary.

00:01:48The HOA handbook says nothing about beekeeping, Ned.

00:01:52Well, until it's amended, just mind your own bees-ness and let's have a toast.

00:01:56Here's to the next chapter of life, love, and pursuit of the holidays.

00:02:02Cheers.

00:02:03Cheers.

00:02:04Sweetheart, it's time.

00:02:08Okay, Mom.

00:02:09Yes, dear.

00:02:10Do not call my mom dear.

00:02:12Gentlemen, let's do this.

00:02:15Yeah!

00:02:34Hey.

00:02:35Hey.

00:02:36Hey.

00:02:37Dearly beloved, we are gathered today to celebrate the union of these two beautiful souls.

00:02:55Emily, the moment I fell in love with you was captured on a Polaroid picture when we were

00:03:00seven years old on your front porch, and from that day on I've been looking forward to this

00:03:04day.

00:03:05As I stand in front of you today, although my knees are shaking a bit like that Polaroid

00:03:09picture, I've watched you develop into this beautiful, smart, kind woman that I could

00:03:20spend the rest of my life with.

00:03:23And I promise you I will do my best to paint a perfect picture of love and devotion together,

00:03:34forever.

00:03:36Jared, I always knew there was something very special about you.

00:03:41And when we reconnected, everyone reminded me of what an amazing architect you are.

00:03:50And they were right.

00:03:51The way you have designed your life with loyalty for the ones you love.

00:03:55And it shows me who you really are at your core.

00:03:58You make me feel safe and supported.

00:04:01And there is no one I would rather make plans to build the rest of my life with than you.

00:04:08Emily Melrose, do you take Jared to be your lawful wedded husband?

00:04:14I do.

00:04:15Jared Farnsworth, do you take Emily to be your lawful wedded wife?

00:04:19Absolutely, without a doubt.

00:04:22I do.

00:04:23Then, by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife, and you may now kiss the bride.

00:04:29You may be wondering why we didn't do a Christmas wedding.

00:04:56We considered it.

00:04:57But in memory of Jared's late father, we chose to do it on his parents' anniversary.

00:05:01And even though we had a fun-filled honeymoon planned, we were both excited to get back home

00:05:06and get into the spirit of the upcoming holidays.

00:05:09The only problem was, this year, we had no idea what kind of spirit it would bring.

00:05:15Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:36Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:37Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:38Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:39Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:40Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:41Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:42Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:43Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:44Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:45Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:46Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:47Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:48Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:49Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:50Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:51Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:52Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:53Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:54Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:55Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:56Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:57Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:58Ghosts and ghouls.

00:05:59Ghosts and ghouls.

00:06:00Looks like we got a couple bonafide Frida-philes. Gonna move in for a closer look. Watch my six.

00:06:18Double-double toil and trouble.

00:06:22Alright, so what are we gonna do about this, folks? Should I get the president on the line?

00:06:26Let him enjoy his honeymoon. We'll break it to him when he gets back.

00:06:28We get it, Belinda. You want grandchildren, but I think he would want to know.

00:06:31Don't mess this up for me.

00:06:35Are you excited, my lovely?

00:06:37By the pricking of my thumb, something wicked this way comes.

00:06:41I'll take that as a yes.

00:06:45You have too many ghosts. Not enough headstones. Come on, people. Get it right.

00:06:51Ow. Ow. Squirrel.

00:06:54Jared, you really didn't have to spring for a stretch limo. We're just on our way home from the airport.

00:06:58Oh, but I did. We were still on our honeymoon.

00:07:00It was the best honeymoon ever. I enjoyed every second of it with you.

00:07:05You know what? After two weeks in Scandinavia, I am actually really excited to get back home.

00:07:09I could have used one more week in Fláfulent.

00:07:12I think I preferred Itzkyltunia.

00:07:13I wonder if you'll feel the same way after we celebrate Valpergus Night this spring.

00:07:17I pre-booked the hotel and everything.

00:07:18I'm sorry, what?

00:07:19The biggest Swedish springtime festival that there is. Apparently it's not to be missed.

00:07:23Honey, I love that you're a planner, but vacations are kind of something we need to plan together now.

00:07:28You're right. You're right. I just got too excited. I'm used to planning things on my own.

00:07:33But now, we're married. We make decisions together.

00:07:38Yeah.

00:07:38Because you're my wife.

00:07:39My husband.

00:07:41I love you.

00:07:46Oh.

00:07:47Oh, wow.

00:07:52Oh, wow.

00:07:54I wonder if Pamela's remodel's done.

00:07:56Glad she liked the design.

00:07:57Oh, she was so happy with it.

00:07:58You did such a good job.

00:08:00I wish I was as fulfilled at my job as you are.

00:08:02You're literally the best writer right now.

00:08:04Copywriter.

00:08:05I said what I said. I mean it.

00:08:06Thanks, love.

00:08:07I'll get back into it.

00:08:08I just wish we could stay in Fantasyland a little bit longer.

00:08:11Well, then you are in luck, because like the medieval knights of the old,

00:08:14I shall carry you over the threshold of our new castle.

00:08:17Really not necessary.

00:08:18It's a sign of my love and affection for you.

00:08:21A literal symbol that I would drop everything on account of your beck and call.

00:08:27Jared!

00:08:31Jared!

00:08:32Jared!

00:08:33Oh, I'm so sorry.

00:08:34Jared, get over here.

00:08:35Get over here.

00:08:36Are you okay?

00:08:37Are you sure?

00:08:37I'm okay.

00:08:37I'm fine.

00:08:38Oh, no.

00:08:39Not again.

00:08:40It's time.

00:08:41No, no, no, no, Jared.

00:08:41Let's bring it down a notch.

00:08:42Remember the mantra we've been working on?

00:08:44Not my weeds, not my garden.

00:08:45Emily, when you hold the mantle of the presidency, this entire neighborhood is my garden.

00:08:53Oh, if you will.

00:08:53You brought the clipboard on the honeymoon?

00:09:02You rang?

00:09:06Yes, I did ring.

00:09:07I wanted to introduce myself and ask you a few questions about your understanding of the

00:09:12HOA guidelines.

00:09:13Honey, I don't think that's an actual person.

00:09:15I think that's a recording.

00:09:16I think you're probably right.

00:09:17Sorry.

00:09:21Seriously, did you guys ring?

00:09:23Hi.

00:09:26Hi.

00:09:27I am Jared Farnsworth, HOA president of this lovely neighborhood.

00:09:30This is my first counselor and head of activities committee, Emily Melrose.

00:09:34Farnsworth?

00:09:35Emily Farnsworth.

00:09:36It's my newest title.

00:09:37Jared and I got married last month.

00:09:38Congratulations.

00:09:39We've heard tale of the presidential power couple.

00:09:41I had a premonition we would be graced by your presence.

00:09:44Won't you come inside?

00:09:45That would be amazing.

00:09:46It would, it would, except that my wife and I, we just got back from our honeymoon and

00:09:50we're very, very, very tired.

00:09:51That's nothing a little jack-o'-lantern job won't fix.

00:09:54And Marvin makes them extra strong.

00:09:56Yes, I do.

00:09:57That sounds amazing.

00:09:58Sure it is, I'm sure it is, except that we haven't been deloused yet.

00:10:01Deloused?

00:10:02Yes.

00:10:02But in the meantime, per your display, as detailed as it is, we are going to have to

00:10:06ask you to, you know, pare it back.

00:10:08Pare it back?

00:10:10The lights and the pumpkins can stay, great touch, actually, but your lawn display has

00:10:14to go back into the crib, as it were.

00:10:20I don't understand.

00:10:21Our realtor told us this was the most festive neighborhood in all of the state of Utah.

00:10:26And we are.

00:10:27Yes, at Christmas.

00:10:28We are ever green lane, not ever screen lane.

00:10:31Whatever screen lane, why do you love that?

00:10:33We should totally call it that.

00:10:34Oh, yes.

00:10:35No, don't do that.

00:10:36That was just a very clever play on words for me to emphasize my point.

00:10:40Which is what exactly?

00:10:42Per HOA guidelines, we, um, it, it says that section 12, I'm pretty sure it says you have

00:10:52too much Halloween.

00:10:53Well, that's not what Albert told us.

00:10:54And it was confirmed by Gabe.

00:10:56Oh, so you've met my parents.

00:10:57They were the first to welcome us to the neighborhood.

00:10:59It's so nice of you both to let them stay with you for the rest of hurricane season, especially

00:11:04right after the wedding.

00:11:05Must be scoring some serious son-in-law points fair.

00:11:09Well, I better be.

00:11:11You know what?

00:11:11Why don't you just excuse us?

00:11:13We're going to get settled.

00:11:13And then we can discuss this whole in-laws and by-laws situation.

00:11:16Does that sound okay?

00:11:17Fair as foul and foul as fair.

00:11:20Just let us know.

00:11:22Will do.

00:11:23Let's go.

00:11:23You're right.

00:11:24So great to meet you.

00:11:26Ta-ta.

00:11:27Same here.

00:11:28It's a strange couple.

00:11:30Indeed.

00:11:35I really hope you're not mad at me.

00:11:36I'm definitely not mad, Emily.

00:11:38I'm just a little surprised is all.

00:11:40Why didn't you tell me you invited them?

00:11:41So sorry.

00:11:41My mom asked in the middle of the wedding craziness and I just forgot.

00:11:45I truly am sorry.

00:11:46But they're in the guest loft above the garage.

00:11:48You're never going to see them.

00:11:49Don't apologize.

00:11:51I love your parents.

00:11:52I love hosting your parents.

00:11:53It's just, you know, like you said, it's just me and you now.

00:11:56So I just want to be on the same page on this stuff.

00:11:58That's all.

00:11:59Absolutely.

00:11:59I got your back.

00:12:01And I've got yours.

00:12:04Now, let's take care of this decoration situation.

00:12:07All right.

00:12:09Jared, what seems to be the problem?

00:12:11Oh, I don't know, Halbert.

00:12:12Maybe the fact that we got back from the wedding of our dreams only returned to a nightmare.

00:12:15It's just a few lawn decorations.

00:12:17That's how it starts.

00:12:18And the next thing you know, the younger generation, they're sneaking out of their bedrooms searching

00:12:22for the great pumpkin.

00:12:22Let's not get crazy now.

00:12:24I'm not.

00:12:26It's just, I'm hoping we are being sensitive to those who may not feel comfortable celebrating

00:12:33this time of year.

00:12:35We have bylaws put in place like this for a reason, right?

00:12:37But that's not entirely true.

00:12:39What do you mean it's not true?

00:12:40The motion to de-escalate the other holidays was proposed and hotly debated.

00:12:44But in the end, it was never voted on and therefore never passed.

00:12:51What other lies have I been told?

00:12:53Nobody lied to you, Jared.

00:12:54The council just decided after what happened, maybe a vote wasn't necessary.

00:13:00Everyone agreed to honor the de-escalation of Halloween out of respect.

00:13:05But technically, there's no official bylaw.

00:13:07What do you mean after what happened?

00:13:09Oh, honey, have you forgotten?

00:13:12We did all of this for you.

00:13:14For me?

00:13:16Maybe she blocked it out.

00:13:18It was the last big Halloween we celebrated on the lane.

00:13:21You mean the last year with Grandma?

00:13:32Excuse me.

00:13:34I'll be in the basement.

00:13:37The ba-

00:13:38The ba-

00:13:39Hey, Graham Graham.

00:14:04I'm sorry I left you down here.

00:14:05I just couldn't figure out exactly where to put you.

00:14:12Your memory lives best in my head anyway.

00:14:16I know it's not the best way to deal with things, but here we are in a basement full of old memories.

00:14:23No one can bother us.

00:14:25Hey!

00:14:25Too many Christmas, you scared me.

00:14:26I'm sorry.

00:14:27I know how you feel about basements and, uh, well, you've been down here for, wow, 27 minutes and counting.

00:14:34It's got to be a record for me.

00:14:36Honestly, it's not that bad.

00:14:41What?

00:14:41What's that?

00:14:43Bernice.

00:14:45Yeah, I know.

00:14:46I still hate it down here.

00:14:50You okay?

00:14:52Yeah.

00:14:53I'll be fine.

00:14:54Oh.

00:14:55I think I've just been so focused on the wedding and our future that I kind of forgot about the past.

00:15:05Well, she was a great woman.

00:15:07Yeah, I can still hear her voice.

00:15:10Remember what she always used to say to us?

00:15:12You two belong in a storybook.

00:15:19It's Halloween, sweetie.

00:15:21What could you possibly be upset about?

00:15:23Ashlyn Ashworth and her friends just like scarecrows in her yard, and they totally jumped out and scared us.

00:15:29You got yard yelp, did you?

00:15:30Yep.

00:15:31Don't let them get to you.

00:15:33They were just trying to have fun.

00:15:34But I ran so fast, I spilled my candy on the way back.

00:15:38That's okay, Emily.

00:15:40I'll share mine.

00:15:40Jared, that won't be necessary.

00:15:43I'll take you two out on the golf cart.

00:15:45Awesome.

00:15:46I heard Mary Louise and Bob are giving out full-size candy bars.

00:15:50We've got to get there before they run out.

00:15:52All in good time, my pretties.

00:15:54All in good time.

00:15:58Before we go, why don't you tell Jared what I always say about Halloween?

00:16:04Never go to Ned's house.

00:16:06He only gives out freeze-dried elk liver.

00:16:09True.

00:16:09What else do I say about Halloween?

00:16:11It started as a day to remember those who passed away.

00:16:14Even though we get to dress up and get candy from our friends and family.

00:16:19We should also remember our friends and family members that aren't with us anymore.

00:16:23And not only should we remember them, but they should be celebrated.

00:16:27But why do we dress up?

00:16:29Because it's tradition.

00:16:30And there's no better way to connect with your friends and neighbors than through age-old traditions.

00:16:36Now, what do you say we get back to my favorite one of all?

00:16:39Trick-or-treating!

00:16:40Let's do it!

00:16:41All right, kids.

00:16:43Mount up!

00:16:43Woo!

00:16:44Happy Halloween!

00:16:46We got so much candy that year.

00:16:49Buckets full.

00:16:49I had no idea that'd be the last time she took us trick-or-treating.

00:16:56She was gone just two weeks later.

00:16:58That's when the neighborhood decided to take a step back?

00:17:00She was the center of the celebration with her creativity and the costumes and the decorations.

00:17:06She always inspired everybody.

00:17:07Halloween was never the same without her.

00:17:09Of course I was heartbroken when she passed, but I had no idea that's why everyone else pulled back from celebrating.

00:17:14And I never asked for that.

00:17:16And certainly not something Graham Graham would have wanted.

00:17:19Oh, you're right.

00:17:19She said it herself.

00:17:21Halloween is for remembering your loved ones and having a whole lot of fun.

00:17:26It's time we bring Halloween back.

00:17:28Evergreen style.

00:17:29Are you sure about this?

00:17:30No.

00:17:31I'm not sure about this.

00:17:32I'm actually scared hot to death about this.

00:17:34You know how I am.

00:17:35I don't like scary movies.

00:17:35I don't even like movies that people say aren't scary, but definitely are.

00:17:38Tell me about it.

00:17:38I'm trying to get you to finish Never Ending Story for forever.

00:17:41Yeah, that's never going to happen because I hate quicksand as much as I hate scary basements.

00:17:45Noted.

00:17:45But it's time for you to wake up and face the creepy organ music.

00:17:49For the neighborhood.

00:17:51And for Grandma.

00:17:52And for you.

00:17:54Now, let's get you out of here.

00:17:58First.

00:17:58No kissing in the creepy basement.

00:18:00Fair enough.

00:18:01Speed it up, Buttercup.

00:18:02We've got work to do.

00:18:06Looking good, Grandma.

00:18:07I figure I can call you that.

00:18:11I'll let him officially in the family.

00:18:14Don't worry.

00:18:16We're going to make you proud.

00:18:18Come up to the attic.

00:18:20You have to see this.

00:18:22Em, do you just want to bring him down here?

00:18:24I can't.

00:18:25Just, please, just come up.

00:18:27Wow.

00:18:54Look what I found.

00:18:55Portal to Pan's Labyrinth?

00:18:57My grandma's witch hat.

00:19:00Oh, there's so much great stuff up here.

00:19:02I can see why you spent so much time here.

00:19:04Wait, you've never been to my attic?

00:19:06No.

00:19:07I was never allowed.

00:19:08Apparently, I'm still trespassing.

00:19:09No boys allowed.

00:19:11Even Jawed Farnsworth.

00:19:13The spelling was atrocious.

00:19:15In your defense, that is the way I used to pronounce it.

00:19:17No.

00:19:17Jared Farnsworth is very much allowed up here.

00:19:20He's not a boy.

00:19:21He's a man.

00:19:22My man.

00:19:22Mm-hmm.

00:19:23All right, we have to brainstorm how we are going to make this the best Halloween in years.

00:19:28We could start by selling tickets to this creepy attic.

00:19:31Come on, it's not that creepy.

00:19:34I will not be ashamed by my choice in music.

00:19:36And how do you explain the creepy typewriter from The Shining?

00:19:39That was my grandma's.

00:19:40She taught me to type on that one.

00:19:42Yeah, and that was the desk where I would sit and write all my stories.

00:19:45You know, maybe this is a message from her to get you to start writing again.

00:19:49I wish she'd sent that message to my former agent or publisher or two.

00:19:54I spent most of my 20s trying to make a career out of writing stories, but it just wasn't meant to be.

00:20:00Maybe it's best this chapter of my life is left up here, just a beautiful childhood memory.

00:20:05This was your dream, Em.

00:20:07Yeah, but when your dream is just collecting dust in a box, it's time to pack it up and move on.

00:20:15All right, we've got to get busy.

00:20:16Okay.

00:20:17We have an HOA meeting to plan.

00:20:18Yes.

00:20:18We have some serious bylaws to propose.

00:20:20I am going to mobilize the ladies of the activities committee, and if you could coordinate with Ned about a venue.

00:20:25On it.

00:20:38Oh, Jared.

00:20:45Thanks for the inspiration, Graham.

00:20:48We'll make you proud.

00:20:53All right, evergreen ladies.

00:20:54This may come as a very big surprise, but in honor of my sweet Grandma Melrose, I want to help bring back Halloween in a big way.

00:21:02So let's get a good old-fashioned brainstorm going on the thread.

00:21:05Traditions, old and new.

00:21:06All ideas welcome fire them off.

00:21:09And as Graham Graham would say, mount up!

00:21:14Come on, honey, let's go!

00:21:15Ned's hosting, and you know he needs a good 36-hour advance notice to demust the place.

00:21:19Coming, sweetheart.

00:21:20I thought we agreed after the last time that we weren't going to hold the HOA meetings at Ned's anymore.

00:21:29I mean, he served expired military rations.

00:21:32I think we should have a potluck to go.

00:21:34Well, then we're going to need a lot of luck because Susie's funeral potatoes almost killed me.

00:21:38I'm impressed you really upped your game here.

00:21:41What, is the queen coming?

00:21:42Nothing says royalty like charcuterie.

00:21:44I've got the donuts!

00:21:46Gips on the creepy cruller!

00:21:47Ned, don't push me on the pastries.

00:21:50You can't have a creepy cruller because they don't exist.

00:21:54Wait, there are only crullers?

00:21:56No donuts?

00:21:57I know how popular they are, so I made them all crullers.

00:22:00I'm sorry, what did you say?

00:22:01Crullers?

00:22:02I, I said crullers.

00:22:04That's what I thought.

00:22:04Thank you, Belinda.

00:22:06At least you won't embarrass yourself leg-wrestling Bob for one of them.

00:22:09I would have won if he let me wear my orthotic sneakers.

00:22:12It was barefoot or bust in my day.

00:22:15That's because they hadn't invented shoes yet.

00:22:17So, what's the tea, fam?

00:22:20Are the new neighbors going to show up today?

00:22:23If they do, I'm sure it'll be in a puff of smoke or on broomback.

00:22:26I swear, those two are witches.

00:22:29Have you ever heard that Luna speak?

00:22:30Every word she says sounds like she's casting a spell.

00:22:33So spooky.

00:22:34Yeah.

00:22:35They've been invited, as per Jared, in the Prima Conventus Clause of 94.

00:22:40I've heard that Marvin is a mortgage banker by day and moonlights as an undertaker just for kicks.

00:22:47I don't know what they called them in the 19th century, but today we call them morticians.

00:22:52And where did you hear that from, anyway?

00:22:54I'll give you a hint.

00:22:56He wears a singlet for underwear and he believes that pro-wrestling is real.

00:23:02If a masked man gave you the tombstone pile driver at a Waffle House outside of Galveston,

00:23:07I assure you, you would know just how real it is.

00:23:11I can see that your ongoing litigation with the undertaker hasn't been resolved.

00:23:15That doesn't mean that Marvin works in a mortuary for fun.

00:23:19Think about it.

00:23:19The initial's M. Balmer.

00:23:22M. Balmer!

00:23:24What kind of a cruel joke were his parents playing?

00:23:26Worst part is, I'm M. Balmer V.

00:23:29So that's five generations of being bullied in middle school.

00:23:32But no, I am not a mortician for fun or professionally.

00:23:35I just want to clear that up from the jump.

00:23:37Sorry, didn't mean to be rude.

00:23:38I'm not offended in the least.

00:23:40Round about the cauldron go, in the poison entrails throw.

00:23:45Not the poison, then it entrails.

00:23:47And while we're at it, my wife is not a witch.

00:23:50Exactly what a witch would say.

00:23:52Dibs on the ruby slippers.

00:23:53Round about the cauldron go, in the poison entrails throw.

00:23:59Yes.

00:24:01Oh, I'm sorry.

00:24:03You guys must think I'm crazy.

00:24:05I just got cast in Macbeth at the Castle Theater.

00:24:07She's going to be witch number one.

00:24:08Yeah, that's sort of a dream role for me.

00:24:11Your dream role is witch number one?

00:24:13Yeah, because witch number two was already cast.

00:24:15Marvin and I are English professors at UVU and total Shakespeare buffs.

00:24:20What light through yonder window breaks, tis our new neighbors, and Halloween is their sun.

00:24:26I see we have a fellow Shakespearean among us.

00:24:28Just got my bard card renewed a fortnight ago.

00:24:31Huzzah!

00:24:33Here we go.

00:24:34And your lawn display is amazing, B.T. Dibs.

00:24:37An homage to the great tragedies.

00:24:40Shakespeare was the father of the modern horror genre.

00:24:42Thou speaketh truth.

00:24:44Aye, aye.

00:24:45Aye.

00:24:45All right, Atlas, I hate to break up this fun little drama camp we've got going on here,

00:24:52but this is Evergreen Lane, not the Globe Theater.

00:24:56And our HOA president would never allow this level of theatrics.

00:25:04Ladies and gentlemen of the HOA, for the first time ever, we present...

00:25:08To your muster stations!

00:25:16Move!

00:25:18Move!

00:25:21I got the cramers!

00:25:23It's pronounced cruller!

00:25:29Ladies and gentlemen, I do apologize for this late start.

00:25:32I was unaware of the potency of indoor smoke bombs.

00:25:35You could've just borrowed my Bulgarian fog condenser, but...whatever.

00:25:39Noted.

00:25:41I'm sure you're all wondering why we called this last-minute meeting.

00:25:44No, not really.

00:25:46Emily emailed us all an itinerary last night.

00:25:48Great.

00:25:48Well, I'm sure you're all wondering why the change of heart then.

00:25:51No.

00:25:51Emily sent us a very inspirational voice memo explaining everything.

00:25:56Did she now?

00:25:57That's great.

00:25:58Well, I guess I'm not sure what I'm doing here,

00:26:00other than just looking pretty fly in my vintage J-Pressed suit.

00:26:03You look great, babe. Do you want me to take this?

00:26:05Please, please.

00:26:06All right, everyone.

00:26:07Per addendum B, subparagraph C of the HOA handbook,

00:26:11the head of the Activities Committee

00:26:13has the right and obligation to propose and uphold traditions new and old.

00:26:19I love it when you speak by law.

00:26:21I learn from the best.

00:26:22Wow.

00:26:22You two really took that two-become-one homily to heart.

00:26:25Oh, thank you so much.

00:26:26That's so sweet.

00:26:26That's really sweet.

00:26:27Okay, please stop.

00:26:28So, I took the committee's feedback.

00:26:30I ran it by Mr. President here.

00:26:32And we have decided to turn Evergreen Lane into...

00:26:38Ever-Scream Lane!

00:26:42We have taken the traditions of yesteryear,

00:26:44combined with the zeitgeist of current day,

00:26:47to bring this spooky season to life in a new and thrilling way.

00:26:50What?

00:26:51Inspired by the boldness of the Balmers,

00:26:53each household will be required to create a Halloween lawn display

00:26:58to bring the spirit of this holiday to life.

00:27:00You have one week to get your displays together,

00:27:03or there will be consequences.

00:27:05I mean, it'll be like, you know, a citation or community service hours.

00:27:09But do not tempt me, for I have fresh citation pads.

00:27:13There will be daily activities leading up to Halloween,

00:27:16such as a pumpkin painting contest.

00:27:18Painting?

00:27:20Why don't we just carve those puppies?

00:27:22Because, Ned, pumpkin guts are gross.

00:27:24They're stringy. They're slimy. No.

00:27:25But it's very visceral for me.

00:27:27Okay, please, Ned.

00:27:29We don't have time for your sensory obsession.

00:27:31Touch your corduroys.

00:27:32Thank you, Pamela.

00:27:33You're gonna be thrilled to know that there will be a beastly bake-off.

00:27:36Yes!

00:27:37Ha-ha!

00:27:38Oh, my gosh.

00:27:40I could be ghouly a child.

00:27:42With spooky sweaters.

00:27:44And just how we do a toy drive at Christmas,

00:27:46we will be doing a charity food drive.

00:27:48But...

00:27:49Dun-dun-dun-dun.

00:27:50To top it all off...

00:27:51Sorry, okay, Jared really wanted to do this part, so go ahead.

00:27:55Thank you so much, honey.

00:27:56And to top it all off on All Hallows' Eve...

00:27:59October 31st, Halloween.

00:28:01After the tricks have been played,

00:28:03after the treats have been treated,

00:28:05we will have a cul-de-sac carnival costume competition!

00:28:10So bring that creativity to life.

00:28:13Are there any rules to who we can or cannot impersonate?

00:28:17No more foreign dignitaries.

00:28:18We do not need the FBI here again.

00:28:20Yes, Ned.

00:28:21Please keep all costumes within the parameters of HOA guidelines

00:28:24and in accordance with state and federal laws.

00:28:26Tricky.

00:28:27But not impossible.

00:28:28In light of all this, we have something we'd like to propose.

00:28:31That is, if we can't invoke Intendum 3 of the party protocol.

00:28:34Oh, well, invoke away, please.

00:28:35I know you already have the food drive planned,

00:28:38but every year we do a big, spooky alley in our front yard.

00:28:42We go all out to raise money for the Children's Hospital.

00:28:45As a young girl, I was treated there, and they saved my life.

00:28:49So we try to do everything we can to give back.

00:28:52That's amazing. I mean, double the charity. I love it.

00:28:55I really love it.

00:28:56Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

00:28:58How spooky are we talking?

00:29:00Say like a five or a six on the Nosferatu meter?

00:29:03Uh, we hit a 7.5 once.

00:29:05No. No.

00:29:067.5?

00:29:07But that was close to Y2K, so all sorts of things were happening.

00:29:10That won't happen again.

00:29:12I mean, it was impossible.

00:29:16I think we need to go ahead.

00:29:18Okay, I'm not opposed to it.

00:29:19As long as we remember this is for the kids,

00:29:21so we have to keep the scare factor to a five or below.

00:29:23Yeah, of course.

00:29:24Should we just take a vote?

00:29:25Well, I think we have to.

00:29:26I mean, that's part of the bylaws.

00:29:28Then that settles it.

00:29:29We'll pass out some ballots and we can decide if this neighborhood is ready to come together to face our biggest fears this Halloween.

00:29:36I've already faced my greatest fear.

00:29:38A hot yoga class taught by Ned.

00:29:40It's free on Thursdays.

00:29:42Oh, it might be free, but you will pay dearly.

00:29:45Trust me.

00:29:46Now take me off your MailChimp.

00:29:48Halloween is back, baby.

00:29:55Okay.

00:29:56I hope pumpkin spiced your latte.

00:29:58I'm just so excited.

00:29:59The vote was unanimous.

00:30:01Everyone loved my Halloween plans.

00:30:03And then our new neighbors had this amazing idea to do this outdoor spooky alley,

00:30:06and it's going to raise money for the children's hospital.

00:30:08First lady of ever Scream Lane.

00:30:10You're really taking charge, carving up the HOA handbook.

00:30:13How's Jared doing with all this?

00:30:15At first, it was really hard for him to transition his mind to a new holiday.

00:30:19Kind of like he's cheating on Christmas.

00:30:20Right.

00:30:21But now that he's in it, he's doubling down.

00:30:23It's like Kevin in K-pop.

00:30:24This is new.

00:30:25I played one song for him one time, he totally made fun of me.

00:30:28The next day, it was all he was listening to.

00:30:30He's basically made it his whole personality.

00:30:32Same thing with Jared.

00:30:33He's been driving all the way to Provo to go to this tailor-made costume store almost every day.

00:30:37You are in it.

00:30:38We are, but it is just a lot to balance with work.

00:30:41I feel like I'm kind of just going through the motions.

00:30:43I mean, I'm doing a good job, but it's just, it's not fulfilling.

00:30:46Welcome to most of America.

00:30:47I think it's just, you know, the wedding and the honeymoon.

00:30:50It was so perfect, I just wanted to relive it.

00:30:52Well, the honeymoon phase is great, but the real joy of marriage is the journey that lies ahead.

00:30:57I love that.

00:30:59Speaking of, I have to get that little journey to piano lessons.

00:31:03Honey, you want to wrap up that book you're reading?

00:31:05We've got to get going.

00:31:06All done.

00:31:07I finished the whole series, actually.

00:31:08Do you have any more?

00:31:09Oh, I didn't even realize Jared had brought that box down from the attic.

00:31:13No, I only wrote the seven.

00:31:15Seven?

00:31:16How come I only knew about one?

00:31:18After my agent didn't get any bites on the first one, she dropped me like a T-Swift album.

00:31:22Didn't really make sense to continue.

00:31:24I really like the different aliens.

00:31:26Zolt is so funny.

00:31:27Really?

00:31:28What was your favorite part?

00:31:29Probably when the hover wagon was broken and Zolt was the only one who could fix it because

00:31:34of the combo wrench his dad gave him.

00:31:36Wow.

00:31:37He really did read it.

00:31:38Yep.

00:31:39Let me know if you write any more.

00:31:41Thanks, Nicole.

00:31:42I will.

00:31:43Oh, cute costume.

00:31:58You look adorable.

00:31:59So cute.

00:32:00You shall not pass!

00:32:01You shall not pass!

00:32:08Lied fools.

00:32:09Boo!

00:32:10What are you doing here?

00:32:13I've been trying to ask you the same question, but someone I know doesn't answer their phone

00:32:16for the last two hours.

00:32:17I'm sorry.

00:32:18The store's a bit of a dead zone.

00:32:19Didn't you see the sign?

00:32:20Jared, that says undead zone.

00:32:23It's just a clever sign to sell zombie paraphernalia.

00:32:26I love this store.

00:32:27Clearly.

00:32:28You've been coming here every day since we jumped on this haunted hayride.

00:32:31I just want to feel inspired.

00:32:32You know, we have a costume contest coming up.

00:32:34No, no, no.

00:32:35We're doing Phantom of the Opera.

00:32:36We're singing the duet.

00:32:37Yeah.

00:32:38Um, I wanted to talk to you about that.

00:32:40Jared, you know I don't do harmony.

00:32:42What if I did the contest... alone?

00:32:48Oh.

00:32:49Okay.

00:32:50Is that fine?

00:32:51Yeah.

00:32:52I mean, I...

00:32:53I don't know what to say, but...

00:32:54Honest reaction.

00:32:55Go.

00:32:57It's fine.

00:32:58Of course it's fine.

00:32:59Yeah.

00:33:00We have been doing a lot of stuff together lately, and maybe...

00:33:02Maybe we should do some things on our own.

00:33:04Okay.

00:33:05So you're not annoyed!

00:33:06I'm only annoyed that now I have to figure out what I'm doing.

00:33:09Whatever it is, I'm sure it's going to be epic.

00:33:11Speaking of epic, we should discuss lawn display ASAP.

00:33:14Now, what are you thinking?

00:33:16Evil battling robots?

00:33:17Zombie apocalypse?

00:33:18No, no.

00:33:19This is what I wanted to tell you.

00:33:21I think I have found the perfect thing.

00:33:28I'm confused.

00:33:29I thought we were working on the lawn display.

00:33:30Look around.

00:33:31What does this remind you of?

00:33:33Mainly the fact that I missed lunch, and I'm starving, and I want to eat the entire store.

00:33:36No, think about it.

00:33:37Last Halloween with Grandma.

00:33:40Hansel and Gretel.

00:33:41The witch's gingerbread house.

00:33:43What's more Halloween than Grimm's fairy tale?

00:33:45And it's the perfect way to honor Grandma.

00:33:47I'm going to get to work on the blueprints immediately.

00:33:49We don't have time for blueprints.

00:33:50Once we build the witch's house, it'll be the perfect hiding spot for yard yelping.

00:33:53Jared!

00:33:54Yes!

00:33:55No!

00:33:56I didn't think you were into yard yelping.

00:33:57I'm not!

00:33:58I'm not!

00:33:59I'm not!

00:34:02But if I was, I would be like the Daniel Day-Lewis of it.

00:34:06You know I hate when people do that.

00:34:08Ashlyn Ashford still haunts my dreams twenty years later.

00:34:12I could see her in that scarecrow makeup.

00:34:14She's lurking about.

00:34:15Oh, it's horrible.

00:34:16Horrible.

00:34:17Well then, why would you vote to protect yard yelping on the new HOA protocol?

00:34:21Because like it or not, it is a tradition.

00:34:23And traditions are important.

00:34:25But that's why I added the regulation to reduce the scare factor.

00:34:28That way, every screen lane is a Halloween destination for all.

00:34:31Young and old.

00:34:32So impressive.

00:34:33I just really want this to be next level.

00:34:35And it's going to be.

00:34:36Everyone can see it.

00:34:37Thanks.

00:34:38You know, though, speaking of Ashlyn, doesn't she host Wake Up Utah on Channel 6?

00:34:43Yes.

00:34:44Her mom and mine stayed friends after they moved.

00:34:47She mentions it every time she's on TV.

00:34:50Do you think she could put me in contact with her?

00:34:52Maybe they could do a story about what we're up to this year.

00:34:55Sure, but aren't you guys, like, frenemies?

00:34:58I mean, we were.

00:34:59But it was a long time ago.

00:35:01And if it could help bring people to the carnival, that would be great.

00:35:04I mean, our neighborhood isn't exactly known as a Halloween destination.

00:35:07So if we want to raise some serious money for Children's Hospital,

00:35:10I do think it's worth a try.

00:35:11I like where your head's at.

00:35:12Cheers.

00:35:13Where's your stomach at?

00:35:14Because I'm starving.

00:35:15Excuse me.

00:35:16Can we get a dozen pastries to go?

00:35:17And one is German chocolate cookies.

00:35:19And, uh, oh, threw in two honey boys.

00:35:21Excuse me.

00:35:23Could I see this, please?

00:35:24Orange.

00:35:25Ooh, they clear.

00:35:26Two, they clear.

00:35:27Careful, Bob.

00:35:28I don't want to fall down.

00:35:29He's a werewolf.

00:35:30Why would he be wearing a ball gown?

00:35:31Let's judge this guy up.

00:35:32Careful, that could be flammable.

00:35:33Trust me.

00:35:34I know.

00:35:35Jared!

00:35:36Slow down!

00:35:37Looking good, Belinda.

00:35:38Thanks, Boo.

00:35:39Did you just call Ned your Boo?

00:35:40No.

00:35:41I-I was just trying to scare him.

00:35:42Boo!

00:35:43Did I scare him?

00:35:44Did I scare him?

00:35:45Boo!

00:35:46Did I scare him?

00:35:47Boo!

00:35:48I was just trying to scare him.

00:35:49Boo!

00:35:50I was just trying to scare him.

00:35:52Boo!

00:35:53Did I scare him?

00:35:54I was just trying to scare him.

00:35:55Boo!

00:35:56Did I scare you?

00:35:57Right out of my socks, girl.

00:36:00Hey, Jared.

00:36:01Help me put the nails in my coffin.

00:36:04Gladly.

00:36:13Smile, you two.

00:36:15Oh, what a couple of handsomes you are.

00:36:18Ah!

00:36:19Oh, my goodness.

00:36:20Oh!

00:36:21Oh, your bum.

00:36:22You need some ice on this.

00:36:24Jared!

00:36:25A little help?

00:36:26Yeah, I got you.

00:36:27What do you clowns think you're doing?

00:36:29Ah, thank you.

00:36:30Yes.

00:36:31Jared, it has been a real circus around here with these guys.

00:36:34I swear, one of them is possessed.

00:36:36You know, clowns freak a lot of people out, but not me.

00:36:39I actually kind of like them.

00:36:41Well, you are braver than I am.

00:36:43You know, I'm going to try to get these guys set up over there.

00:36:45I mean, you've been working out.

00:36:46Could you get that big clown stood up?

00:36:48Of course.

00:36:49Anything, of course, Pamela.

00:36:50Sure.

00:36:52Oh!

00:36:53Ah!

00:36:54You just got yard-yelped.

00:36:57Hard!

00:36:58You did, Jared!

00:37:01You got me, Helen.

00:37:02You got me good.

00:37:03I thought you said clowns didn't scare you.

00:37:06Hope we didn't scare you too bad.

00:37:08Don't you ever apologize for a well-executed prank.

00:37:11Jared is a big boy.

00:37:13He can handle it.

00:37:14That's right.

00:37:15Oh, look!

00:37:16None of Belinda are trying to prank you too.

00:37:20Are you seeing what I'm seeing?

00:37:23Oh, my gosh.

00:37:24Jared?

00:37:25Jared, are you okay?

00:37:26What's happening to him, Mom?

00:37:27I don't know, sweetie.

00:37:28Just go inside!

00:37:30Yes, dear.

00:37:32Whatever.

00:37:33Looking good, Belinda!

00:37:34Thanks, boo.

00:37:36Oh, I'm sorry.

00:37:37Oh, here.

00:37:38Oh.

00:37:39Is that better?

00:37:40Yeah.

00:37:41That's better.

00:37:42Jared, are you okay?

00:37:47I've seen that people.

00:37:50Jared, don't do anything crazy!

00:38:00Emily!

00:38:02Emily?

00:38:05Emily, where are you?

00:38:06I'm in the kitchen.

00:38:07No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

00:38:10Is everything okay?

00:38:11No!

00:38:12It's not okay.

00:38:13We are, in fact, in a worst-case scenario scenario.

00:38:15Did you get rejected from the Santa Academy?

00:38:17What? Did you hear something?

00:38:18No!

00:38:19It's worse than that!

00:38:20How is that even possible?

00:38:21It's Ned.

00:38:22Did he steal your devil sticks?

00:38:23What? No.

00:38:24Where are those, by the way?

00:38:25It's so odd.

00:38:26Maybe they'll show up.

00:38:27It's so bad, I don't even want to say it out loud.

00:38:28Okay, is he going through, like, a flat-earth phase again?

00:38:29It's worse than that!

00:38:30Okay, you're killing me, Small! Spit it out!

00:38:31Ned is dating my mom!

00:38:35Oh, no.

00:38:41I don't care what he says, I refuse to call him Dad.

00:38:44You might be getting ahead of yourself here.

00:38:45You don't know how serious it is yet.

00:38:47Whatever it was, it definitely was not in the friend zone.

00:38:50Do they know that you saw them flirting?

00:38:52No, and I'll never say a word, because I want it erased from my memory.

00:38:55Every time I close my eyes, I can just see the way they were looking at each other.

00:38:59Just focused and intense, like there was no one else in the cul-de-sac.

00:39:02That actually sounds kind of sweet.

00:39:04The man pours pickle brine in his shredded wheat.

00:39:07There's nothing sweet about him.

00:39:11I have to tell Pamela not to tell anyone.

00:39:13She saw too?

00:39:14Is that bad?

00:39:15That's not good.

00:39:16Is she going to tell everyone?

00:39:17I mean, that tea's probably too hot for her not to spill.

00:39:18We have to stop this.

00:39:19I get that you're upset, but you've got to remember they're adults.

00:39:21And Ned is... Ned, and maybe that's what your mom wants.

00:39:23Or maybe she's under a spell.

00:39:25Didn't you say that he studied hypnosis in Vienna?

00:39:28Jared, you have to talk to her.

00:39:30Ask her how she's feeling.

00:39:32She's obviously worried, and that's why she's hiding it from you.

00:39:34So tell her it's safe for her to talk to you about it.

00:39:37At this point, I don't know if it is.

00:39:39Great.

00:39:40Okay, why don't you just take a breath?

00:39:41I can go work on the gingerbread house.

00:39:42I'm sure there's some gumdrops that need to be gummed, or some candy that needs to be caned.

00:39:45What?

00:39:46There's no candy canes at Halloween.

00:39:48Jared, just eat your pie.

00:39:50For you, I will.

00:39:51Needs more sprinkles.

00:39:53That looks good.

00:39:55When did you do this?

00:39:57I've been wrapped up with all this Ned knot since I even noticed this.

00:40:00What are you doing over here?

00:40:01Jess was over here with Nicole the other day, and she read all of his books that you had brought down from the attic.

00:40:06And she really loved them, and it just kind of inspired me to pick it up again.

00:40:09You totally should.

00:40:10It's very casual.

00:40:11Just the neighborhood had inspired an idea, and it just, you know, just started sketching some things out.

00:40:16Sketch away, my love.

00:40:17Looks great.

00:40:18You're so talented.

00:40:19Thank you, honey.

00:40:20I love you.

00:40:21Yeah.

00:40:22Oh!

00:40:23Oh my goodness, Ashlyn texted me back.

00:40:24Oh, nice.

00:40:25What'd she say?

00:40:26The Channel 6 News is coming to Everscreen Lane.

00:40:29What?

00:40:30Yeah!

00:40:31I'm gonna text the girls.

00:40:34What happened there, Graham?

00:40:36How'd you go all skiwampus on me again?

00:40:37Yeah.

00:40:38Yeah.

00:40:39Everything's looking really good around here.

00:40:41And...

00:40:42I'm writing again.

00:40:43I mean, I'm not getting too excited just because of what happened last time, but I am having so much fun.

00:40:53And that's enough for me right now.

00:40:54Anyway, it's turning into the picture-perfect holiday, and it just feels like everything's come full circle.

00:41:06I only wish you were here to see it.

00:41:07Love you.

00:41:08Good night.

00:41:09Good night.

00:41:10Good night.

00:41:11I'm Ashlyn Ashworth, and welcome to Wake Up Utah.

00:41:12We are here on Evergreen Lane.

00:41:13Or should I say Ever-Scream Lane?

00:41:14A neighborhood that is usually known for Christmas has traded its cheer for fear.

00:41:15It feels like everything's come full circle.

00:41:16It feels like everything's come full circle.

00:41:17I only wish you were here to see it.

00:41:18Love you.

00:41:19Good night.

00:41:20I'm Ashlyn Ashworth, and welcome to Wake Up Utah.

00:41:21We are here on Evergreen Lane, or should I say Ever-Scream Lane, a neighborhood that is

00:41:40usually known for Christmas has traded its cheer for fear this spooky season.

00:41:45When we come back, we will join them as they kick off the much-anticipated neighborhood pumpkin

00:41:50painting contest, a tradition that has been squashed for over 25 years.

00:41:57I nailed that, right?

00:41:58Hey, is it a bad time?

00:41:59No, not at all.

00:42:00We're on commercial.

00:42:01It is great to see you, Emily.

00:42:03Good to see you, too.

00:42:04Thank you so much for coming.

00:42:05Oh, are you serious?

00:42:06I had to see this for myself.

00:42:07I still can't believe that you're behind all of this.

00:42:10We used to live here.

00:42:11You know how festive we get.

00:42:12For Christmas, sure.

00:42:13But ever since you got so scared by my scarecrow prank, this entire neighborhood turned into

00:42:18a ghost town on Halloween, remember?

00:42:20Oh, that is good.

00:42:21Hey, write that down.

00:42:22Oh, I remember.

00:42:23And so does my therapist, trust me.

00:42:25Come on.

00:42:26It wasn't that bad.

00:42:27I mean, your friend Jeremy was there, and he didn't seem too scared.

00:42:30Jared.

00:42:31Who?

00:42:32Me.

00:42:33Jared Farnsworth.

00:42:34Oh, I'm so sorry.

00:42:35I meet a lot of people.

00:42:36It's okay.

00:42:37I was with her the night that you yard-yelped us.

00:42:39Dressed as Hansel.

00:42:40You know, we were in Ms. Thornock's homeroom together.

00:42:43Super skinny legs.

00:42:44Always wanted to play the MASH game with us.

00:42:45Super nerdy.

00:42:46That's fun to hear.

00:42:47Oh, yeah.

00:42:48Big dorky glasses.

00:42:49And he would always rig the MASH game to end up with you.

00:42:51I was like, hello.

00:42:53Well, I guess he got his wish because we got married last month.

00:42:58That's amazing.

00:42:59Seriously, congrats you two.

00:43:01And thank you so much for doing this segment.

00:43:02It's really exciting.

00:43:04As HOA president, we really appreciate the exposure.

00:43:07To show how far we've come since we celebrated Halloween on this level.

00:43:10Of course.

00:43:11Do you want me to interview you two?

00:43:12No.

00:43:13Yes.

00:43:14I just was thinking we should keep it about the neighbor.

00:43:16You know?

00:43:17Totally.

00:43:18Okay.

00:43:19Well, we're about to be back, so I can catch up with you guys later.

00:43:20Yeah, girl.

00:43:21Do your thing.

00:43:22Okay.

00:43:23Uh, Ty?

00:43:24Let's move.

00:43:25Let's go get more coverage.

00:43:26Do your thing, girl?

00:43:27What was that?

00:43:28I don't know.

00:43:29I mean, I get around her and I turn into plastic.

00:43:30Ned is the least of my concerns right now.

00:43:32I mean, look.

00:43:33Ned is at the table with my mom.

00:43:34They're on a team.

00:43:35Relax.

00:43:36How am I supposed to relax?

00:43:37It's Ned.

00:43:38And how do you feel about the Halloween traditions coming back to life?

00:43:41It's simply gorgeous.

00:43:43Did you see what I did there?

00:43:45Gord.

00:43:46Gordages.

00:43:47That is a good one.

00:43:48Did you just come up with that?

00:43:49That's been ripening on the vine for years.

00:43:52Don't make me put you down for now, Bob.

00:43:54When you're known for only Christmas, you don't have the opportunity to show your range.

00:43:58Most people know that I have a doctorate in arts and crafts.

00:44:02But what they don't know is that I did a study abroad in the Atacama region of northern Chile,

00:44:08which is the pumpkin capital of South America.

00:44:11Basically, I have forgotten more about these babies than most people will learn in a lifetime.

00:44:16I'm about to PH destroy the competition, if you know what I mean.

00:44:21Do you know what I mean?

00:44:22I think I do.

00:44:23How would you describe your neighbors?

00:44:25Intense.

00:44:26In a good way.

00:44:27Like Benedict from Much Ado About Nothing.

00:44:29I'd say a little more like Catherine from Taming It.

00:44:31True.

00:44:32She's more like Rosalyn.

00:44:33Well, no.

00:44:34I mean, I know you love Rosalyn.

00:44:35Might as well talk about Tartuffe.

00:44:36I'm excited to use the pointillism technique my mom taught me.

00:44:38I think it really captures the essence of the holiday without being too on the nose.

00:44:42I've gone for more of a cubist approach.

00:44:44Using shapes to really represent the surreal nature of what Halloween represents.

00:44:48Look at those couple goals.

00:44:50Adorable.

00:44:51I can't even enjoy this right now.

00:44:52I'm far too upset.

00:44:53Honey, I want you to try to stay calm.

00:44:55Like it the wise.

00:44:56Like it the wise.

00:44:57That's something you only say in your extreme duress.

00:45:00Deep breaths.

00:45:01Ty, for this one, I'd love to get a nice in-camera zoom.

00:45:04As you can see, not everyone dressed up for the painting contest.

00:45:08I guess some of us just care more.

00:45:11Now, Ty, go wide.

00:45:14Go wide.

00:45:16Heyn with us!

00:45:20Fun fact.

00:45:21The first jack-o'-lanterns were made from turnips.

00:45:25Or large potatoes.

00:45:26It's stemmed from the Celtic Samhain festival in Ireland.

00:45:29Which some people pronounce Sa-wen.

00:45:31Yeah.

00:45:32They were believed to ward off evil spirits lurking about.

00:45:37But today, there's a much more jocular meaning to it, and dare I say, romantic.

00:45:44Oh, romantic in what way?

00:45:46Take our pumpkins, for example.

00:45:49Oh, Romeo and Juliet.

00:45:51Correct. We are nearing noontide, so the lighting is not correct for this.

00:45:56But could you imagine what this street would look like at night?

00:46:02And with these pumpkins carved and lit, as they should have been done, come eventide, these star-crossed lovers will surely light up the autumnal sky.

00:46:15Oh, dear.

00:46:16Edgar James Broadhead, step away from my mama.

00:46:22I most certainly will not.

00:46:26Jared, sweetie, you know what? Let's just take a minute and talk about this.

00:46:30That's a great idea, Belinda. You know what? Why don't we turn off the cameras for a second, and we can discuss this.

00:46:33How long has this been going on?

00:46:36Well, I can't speak for the lady, but as for me, two Christmases ago, the night you first took the throne in Santa's village.

00:46:43Betrayed. And in my own kingdom, I will not allow you to defame the Farnsworth name with your unwelcomed advances.

00:46:52They are more than welcome. Thank you very much.

00:46:55Is that true?

00:46:56Truer than true north, more absolute than absolute zero.

00:47:07There you have it, folks. True love right here on live TV.

00:47:12And just like that, HOA President Jared Farnsworth smashes a jack-o'-lantern of love, begging the question, should this neighborhood actually be called ever mean lane?

00:47:33That's enough, Ashland. Back to you, Ted. Back to you, Ted.

00:47:42As a childhood resident of the lane, I know from experience how firm of a grip the homeowners association has on its residents.

00:47:51The intensity is simply too much for some, including my parents.

00:47:54When asked, HOA President Jared Farnsworth refused to make a statement, but his actions spoke much more than words.

00:48:05Many Utahns would dream of living on Evergreen Lane, but today felt more like a nightmare on Elm Street.

00:48:12Oh, come on. That's just yellow journalism.

00:48:14With a reputation like that, I have a feeling the surrounding communities will be frightened away from the rest of the activities this Halloween.

00:48:22Turn it off!

00:48:22I'm Ashland Ashworth, and this is...

00:48:25Thank you for letting us use your house as a neutral holding zone while the deliberation occurs.

00:48:30So sorry you had to see that.

00:48:31I thought it was kind of exciting, actually.

00:48:33Ned Broadhead is dating my mother. Do you understand the implications behind that type of betrayal?

00:48:39And you expect me to be concerned with anything else right now?

00:48:41I mean, I don't know. Left from right, up from down, I don't know. Diagnos right now.

00:48:44I mean, the man who lived next door to me, my best man, and the woman that gave birth to me, she gave birth to me.

00:48:51And I don't know what's happening right now. I'm so confused.

00:48:54Honey, let's just put a hold on the existential crisis until we hear what it is you have to do to make this right.

00:48:58And I just hope they don't strip you of your presidential powers.

00:49:01They can do that?

00:49:02It's in the hands of the triumvirate of truth.

00:49:05Is that from Star Wars?

00:49:06Oh, don't let the name fool you. It's just Mary Louise, Pam, and Bob. They meet at Swigalicious and Sugarhouse.

00:49:10Don't belittle the system. These are time-proven protocols, emergency measures to bring balance to the bylaws.

00:49:16Star Wars.

00:49:17Who can forget the great Hayfield-McAvoy debate of 91 when a power grid dispute almost canceled Christmas?

00:49:24But lo, two humble HOA members stepped into the breach and created the Magna Carta of merriment.

00:49:31Are you saying all this because you and I invented it?

00:49:33Can't I just be proud of our work?

00:49:35Yes, but you don't make us sound humble.

00:49:36Humble schmumble? That's not a nice accusation.

00:49:39Can we please make a good impression on the new neighbors?

00:49:42Honey, do you think you'll ever forgive me?

00:49:45It's not my forgiveness you need right now.

00:49:47The Triumvirate of Truth has reached a decision.

00:50:08Do what must be done.

00:50:10Jared Farnsworth, you have been charged with destruction of personal property and projecting a pumpkin in a pedestrian perimeter.

00:50:19Not only did this impact the cleanliness of our curbs, but it brought negative news coverage to the neighborhood, which in turn plummeted the projected property values by approximately 3%.

00:50:30Hold my soda.

00:50:31Hold my soda.

00:50:33We know Ned to be neurotic and now is known to be necking with your next of kin.

00:50:38However, we have reviewed the reasoning for your revolt and although we find the target of your treason to be tyrannical, it cannot be tolerated.

00:50:48In order to be forgiven, you must fulfill the following.

00:50:53I don't read Kirstie very well.

00:50:55I'm sorry, Bob. I don't know hieroglyphics.

00:50:59I'll paraphrase.

00:51:01Your powers will be temporarily suspended and given to Emily.

00:51:05Until you make things right.

00:51:06Emotions are running really high right now and we think you need to sit down with Ned and talk it over, man to man.

00:51:13You ruined it, Bob. You took away all of my alliteration and flair.

00:51:16I got you, girl.

00:51:17Basically, you better buy the old buck of beer.

00:51:22I accept the triumvirate's decision.

00:51:25I...

00:51:25I'm sorry. Hold on.

00:51:28Look, I'm all for you making good with Ned.

00:51:30I mean, you can go out on your mandate, you can bro it up all you want,

00:51:33but as your interim president, I have a mandate of my own.

00:51:37Anything.

00:51:38Before you go out with your bro,

00:51:40I think Belinda deserves a one-on-one conversation of her own, don't you?

00:51:45I concur, Madam President.

00:51:47I'm so embarrassed.

00:51:48We had so much soda.

00:51:50I can't believe that we never thought of her.

00:51:52I blame the firm psychological grip of the patriarchy.

00:51:55My bad.

00:51:56It's okay.

00:51:57I've got my traveling quill, all right?

00:51:59I'll just add this to the bottom of the parchment.

00:52:02Okay?

00:52:02Okay, Ben.

00:52:03Do not tell book club about this.

00:52:07Mmm.

00:52:08Yum.

00:52:22Pink drink?

00:52:23Oh, yes. Thank you.

00:52:25You're delicious.

00:52:27You know, you didn't have to spring for the Queen Victoria package.

00:52:30I know.

00:52:31I wanted to.

00:52:34I know you've always wanted to have tea with a daughter,

00:52:36but, you know, there are no rules about having it with a son.

00:52:39I appreciate it, but it's me.

00:52:42We can just talk.

00:52:44Okay.

00:52:46Okay.

00:52:48Then I will start by apologizing.

00:52:52Emily reminded me that we're all adults here, and I sure wasn't acting like one.

00:52:57Neither did I.

00:52:58I could have told you.

00:53:00I should have told you when I first started catching feelings, but it took me a while to realize what was happening.

00:53:06I don't know how to define it exactly, but according to Mary Louise, the kids would say, we're talking.

00:53:23Talking?

00:53:24Talking?

00:53:24What does that mean?

00:53:26First of all, how does an 80-year-old woman know what the lingo is?

00:53:33Mom, the real question is, are you happy?

00:53:36I find myself smiling every day.

00:53:39That Ned is a real Rizzler.

00:53:43Rizzler?

00:53:43Mm-hmm.

00:53:44Love that for you.

00:53:46I think.

00:53:46Your father's been gone for so long that I kind of forgot what it felt like to be seen in that way, and I never expected to feel that way about Ned, but something about him has changed, and I love the way his eyes light up when he sees me or when he listens to me talk, and I know he's one tall glass of some self-distilled spirit, but he gets me, and oh, when he kisses me...

00:54:14Oh, you can stop there.

00:54:15I get the picture.

00:54:17Oh, boy.

00:54:19I think it just caught me by surprise.

00:54:22You know, Ned and I haven't always gotten along, and he's the strangest man I've ever met.

00:54:30But you know I love the guy.

00:54:32I know you do, and honestly, it's still early with us.

00:54:35I don't know what's going to happen, but it means so much to me to know that I have your support.

00:54:41Absolutely.

00:54:42I love you, son.

00:54:43I love you, too.

00:54:43But if you call Ned the Rizzler ever again, I've changed my mind.

00:54:50So when did you first know?

00:54:58Christmas Eve, the year Emily came back.

00:55:02Your mother joined me outside for a mug of hot bourbon cider.

00:55:07It was so dark, I could just see the moon on her hair.

00:55:11And we started talking about our favorite stars.

00:55:17You know, I could not narrow it down to one star, but I do have a favorite nebula.

00:55:21Of course, because everyone knows that.

00:55:23So I was born...

00:55:26May 1st.

00:55:27Yes.

00:55:27Which makes me a...

00:55:29Please land your plane.

00:55:30A Taurus.

00:55:32Taurus.

00:55:33Ugh.

00:55:34Which means my favorite is going to be the Crab Nebula, otherwise known as NGC 1952.

00:55:41Sure.

00:55:42Everyone knows that.

00:55:43Yes.

00:55:43But what I didn't know was your mother's favorite star is...

00:55:48Australia.

00:55:49North star.

00:55:50You didn't know that at all.

00:55:52I literally named the only star I could think of.

00:55:55It's okay.

00:55:55Not all of us are astrophiles.

00:55:57But those of us who are know that it is located in the constellation of Taurus.

00:56:03And then your mother tells me that Australia is really a very famous Greek nymph.

00:56:10How about I stop you right there?

00:56:11It's going to be enough mythology for one evening.

00:56:14No, really.

00:56:14You should Google the story and read it later.

00:56:16It's a scorcher.

00:56:18I promise you I will not.

00:56:20Okay.

00:56:20But do you want to ask you a favor?

00:56:23Yes, sir.

00:56:24First, never use nymph and my mother in the same sentence ever again.

00:56:29That's a big ask.

00:56:30I'm asking.

00:56:31I'm going to try.

00:56:32Try really, really hard.

00:56:34Yes, sir.

00:56:35Also, please treat her well.

00:56:40And please be honest with her.

00:56:44I swear on the stars.

00:56:46And you watch out for yourself too, broadhead.

00:56:48You hear me?

00:56:49Okay.

00:56:49If she breaks your heart, don't come crying to me.

00:56:51The game of love is high risk, high reward.

00:56:55I know what I'm playing.

00:56:57I swear.

00:56:59To risking it all.

00:57:02Do you want to play some pool?

00:57:08I'll play billiards.

00:57:09You can call whatever you want.

00:57:11You're going down, broadhead.

00:57:12Yeah.

00:57:13Sure.

00:57:20Hey, babe.

00:57:21What are you still doing up?

00:57:22I had an idea and it just keeps flowing.

00:57:25I couldn't sleep.

00:57:25How'd it go with Ned and Belinda?

00:57:38Wow.

00:57:39That good, huh?

00:57:41Not my weeds.

00:57:42Not my cart.

00:57:43Well said.

00:57:44I'm about to head to bed.

00:57:49Should I wait up for you?

00:57:51No, I'm almost done here.

00:57:52I was hoping maybe we could snuggle and watch a movie.

00:57:55I think I'm going to make that happen.

00:57:57Do not drop me, please.

00:57:59Why would I drop you?

00:58:00What are you talking about?

00:58:02So by watch a movie, do you mean start a movie and then in 15 minutes you'll be asleep in my arm?

00:58:11Yeah, but first we could flirt a little, you know, laugh and cuddle while we try to find something to watch.

00:58:17That actually sounds amazing.

00:58:18It's my favorite thing in the whole world.

00:58:25You know, the more I think about the Ashlyn situation, I...

00:58:28The more I feel like maybe I should reach out and just try and clear the air.

00:58:34It was me who embarrassed myself on regional TV.

00:58:37No, honey, I'm not talking about Pumpkin Gate.

00:58:40No.

00:58:41Something she said on the broadcast.

00:58:43Like maybe her family felt like they were pushed out of the neighborhood.

00:58:50I mean, I know I can't change anything, but I just would really love to extend a peace offering, you know?

00:58:57I mean, we're adults.

00:58:58We shouldn't be...

00:59:00We shouldn't have this, like, weirdness from our childhood between us.

00:59:05If that's the way you feel, I think you should definitely reach out.

00:59:09Thanks, honey.

00:59:10Mm-hmm.

00:59:10Isn't it so nice to have someone you can say anything to at any time?

00:59:21That is the best definition of marriage I've ever heard.

00:59:32Hey, thanks so much for agreeing to meet me.

00:59:34Oh, of course.

00:59:35I'm sorry I don't have more time.

00:59:36I have just been so busy with the tapings and keeping up with my followers.

00:59:40I've recorded seven cameos this week.

00:59:42Oh, my goodness.

00:59:42I'm going to make it quick.

00:59:44I, um...

00:59:45Don't worry about Michaela.

00:59:46She has heard it all.

00:59:47She is a bolt.

00:59:49I just wanted to apologize for when we were younger.

00:59:52I was the one that scared you, remember?

00:59:54I know, but what I really mean is after that.

00:59:57I know the neighbors went into overdrive trying to protect me after my grandmother passed and after the whole scarecrow thing.

01:00:02And I just really hope that's not the reason your family decided to move away.

01:00:07And after you moved, I thought you were angry at me.

01:00:09I really did.

01:00:10I thought you were mad.

01:00:11And I should have talked to you about it right then and there.

01:00:13And instead, I put up this wall.

01:00:14And it wasn't because I didn't like you.

01:00:16It was actually quite the opposite.

01:00:18Come on, Emily.

01:00:19You nicknamed me Schlin Shady.

01:00:20And that was totally unfair.

01:00:22I mean, how were you supposed to know that I was going to ask Buzz Oki to Sadie's?

01:00:24Everyone wanted to ask Buzz.

01:00:26Ah, blue-eyed Buzz.

01:00:27The truth is, you were so cool and popular and I just loved what you did with the school announcements.

01:00:32You never told me that.

01:00:32Well, I should have.

01:00:33They were clever and funny and everyone loved them.

01:00:36And I mean, look, look where you are now.

01:00:37Secretly, I kind of always wanted to volunteer to write the copy for the teleprompter.

01:00:41Why didn't you say anything?

01:00:42I just never had the courage.

01:00:44And I was embarrassed about how things ended between us when you moved.

01:00:49I just want to say I'm sorry that I let my own insecurities come between what could have been a really cool friendship.

01:00:53We need Ashlyn and Studio C ASAP.

01:00:58Oh, I'm so sorry.

01:00:59I have to run.

01:01:00It's okay.

01:01:01Talk later?

01:01:01Yeah, of course.

01:01:02Go, go, go.

01:01:03Oh, here's a headshot.

01:01:06For free.

01:01:07Oh, thank you.

01:01:07I'll see you soon.

01:01:10That went well.

01:01:13I can't believe you confronted the great and powerful Ashlyn.

01:01:16Been bugging me for years.

01:01:17It felt so good to get it off my chest.

01:01:19I mean, she didn't give me much of a reaction, but that's okay.

01:01:21It was worth it.

01:01:22I've got to say, I'm proud of you on so many levels.

01:01:24Oh, thank you.

01:01:25Also, I think you're really onto something this year.

01:01:27Those spider doodles look amazing.

01:01:28They taste great, too.

01:01:30I had three of them when Mom wasn't looking.

01:01:32Nicole Marie, you're going to make yourself sick.

01:01:34Come on, it's Halloween.

01:01:35Isn't that the point?

01:01:36Well, fine.

01:01:37At least give me a bite, then.

01:01:40Mmm.

01:01:40Those are amazing.

01:01:42I'm so glad.

01:01:44Let's save some room for Pamela's, because, you know, she is a shoo-in to win the contest.

01:01:47No secret there.

01:01:48I don't know.

01:01:48I'm pretty much of a cookie expert at this point.

01:01:51I think you have a chance.

01:01:54Thanks.

01:01:54I mean, we'll see.

01:01:55I just do feel like the creative juices have been flowing, you know, since I started writing again.

01:01:59I don't know.

01:02:00Maybe some of that energy has been absorbed into the baking as well.

01:02:03I was going to say there's something different about you.

01:02:05I thought it was the honeymoon glow, but you got a little spark in you.

01:02:07I didn't realize how much I miss writing.

01:02:09You know, like, I've forgotten about the joy it brings me.

01:02:12I think I thought copywriting was enough, but maybe it's not.

01:02:15Well, now you know.

01:02:17At least you're back to doing something you love.

01:02:18Yeah, exactly.

01:02:19And even if it doesn't turn into something I do for money, at least I know it's important to me.

01:02:22It's exactly how I feel about the real housewives of Salt Lake City.

01:02:25Oh, I wish they'd bring Monica back.

01:02:26Right?

01:02:26She's the best part.

01:02:28I was more intrigued by Jen's storyline.

01:02:31I said I was a good mom, not a perfect mom.

01:02:34I hope it's okay that we're a little late.

01:02:35I'll get to set up.

01:02:36Thanks.

01:02:37Oh, thank you so much for hosting.

01:02:39Belinda was a little preoccupied this week, if you know what I mean.

01:02:42What are you kidding?

01:02:43This is our idea of a housewarming party.

01:02:45More like heartwarming.

01:02:47Seriously, we have lived in a lot of places and never really felt like we fit in.

01:02:52Till now.

01:02:53Oh, well, I think if we looked into the cauldron, we would see a lifetime of friendship ahead for us.

01:03:00Look at our little angel, all caught up in festive spirit.

01:03:05True, I've never seen her so happy, but our angel still can't compete with our devil crude cake.

01:03:10Mmm, Albert, you little demon, you.

01:03:13Come on, come on, just let me have a total taste.

01:03:16Bob, not yeti.

01:03:18Oh, I have never been so in love.

01:03:21Well, if you're so in love, go get me a drink.

01:03:24I can't believe you would take palesthesia over echolocation.

01:03:28I mean, if you lost your prefrontal cortex.

01:03:30See, there you go again, trying to confuse me with your technical jargon.

01:03:33I'm just saying money aside, I would rather be Peter Parker than Bruce Wayne.

01:03:36You are so wrong, Doc Vogue.

01:03:39Oh, Luna, wow.

01:03:43The detail of your piping is amazing.

01:03:47I applaud your efforts, I really do.

01:03:50And this is your first cookie competition, is it?

01:03:53Yep.

01:03:54And I guess we'll have to see if a win is to be or not to be.

01:03:58Oh, never heard that one before.

01:04:00Either way, we're really hoping we can at least turn a few heads.

01:04:03Oh, well, how very optimistic of you.

01:04:06But alas, poor Yorick.

01:04:09Once the judges take a bite of my chocolate chip chupacabras,

01:04:12you're going to be heading home with a participation ribbon

01:04:15pinned on your festive little sweater.

01:04:20And that is what we call pre-game intimidation, Helen.

01:04:25Take notes.

01:04:27Shoot, they're pretty good.

01:04:28Okay, come on.

01:04:29Are we ready?

01:04:35Welcome to the first beastly bake-off in more than 20 years.

01:04:40We had a wickedly hard time judging the entries this year,

01:04:44and I'm a little scared to announce the winner.

01:04:47You should be scared, lover girl,

01:04:49because if I smell any netty boy nepotism, I will go nuclear.

01:04:52I can assure you that outside of this year's amazing entries,

01:04:57there has been no home cooking in the selection process.

01:05:01Unlike Christmas rules, there is only one winner today,

01:05:04no second or third place.

01:05:06That's right, only room for one creature in this cavern, baby.

01:05:10Okay, here we go.

01:05:12And the winner is...

01:05:13for her cinnamon spider doodles,

01:05:19Emily Fudge!

01:05:22What?

01:05:26There's no such thing as cruelers.

01:05:28Pam?

01:05:29Pamela?

01:05:30No, no.

01:05:31Pamela?

01:05:31Pamela, Pamela.

01:05:33Darling, Pamela, it's me.

01:05:35It's Mary Louise.

01:05:37Oh.

01:05:38Mary Louise, it's you.

01:05:40Oh, Bob, it's you too.

01:05:44Oh, you guys, I just, I just had the most horrible dream.

01:05:48Oh, there were cookies and, and a witch and,

01:05:51and, and you were there and, and Belinda, you were there.

01:05:56Oh, and Jared, you were there too and, and still were.

01:06:00You.

01:06:01Easy.

01:06:02Easy.

01:06:04Easy.

01:06:05We've already performed the awards audit.

01:06:07I could confidently confirm that there was no tomfoolery.

01:06:10She won fair and square.

01:06:12But I, you know, and she can't, how good she,

01:06:15she's never been able to cook anything in her life.

01:06:18Pamela, if I had known how much this was going to upset you

01:06:20or how you were going to react,

01:06:21I, I would have just given up and let you in.

01:06:23You and me both.

01:06:24Where's my Helen?

01:06:25She's in her room FaceTiming with her dad.

01:06:29Sure.

01:06:29Well, I don't know if it's a head injury or not,

01:06:34but I want to apologize to all of you.

01:06:39Every year, I get so obsessed with winning

01:06:42that I let it become my identity.

01:06:45But as I look around and see all of your faces,

01:06:47I realize that I've already won

01:06:50because I live on Evergreen Lane

01:06:53and there's no place like home.

01:06:59Uh, you guys, I'm so sorry to interrupt

01:07:01this very sweet moment.

01:07:02Then don't.

01:07:03But I have news.

01:07:05It looks like Channel 6 wants to come out

01:07:06and live stream the Carnival Spooky Alley and all.

01:07:10Looks like we better haul out the Halloween.

01:07:12Yes!

01:07:13Yay!

01:07:19Okay, everyone!

01:07:21Everyone!

01:07:22Thank you so much for coming on such short notice.

01:07:25An opportunity has presented itself

01:07:28and I just had to share and bring it to a vote.

01:07:31I got a text from Ashton Ashworth at Channel 6

01:07:33and it looks like they want to come back to the lane.

01:07:36What about that smear piece she did about us?

01:07:39It wasn't exactly a smear.

01:07:41Jared did go full Billy Corgan on those pumpkins.

01:07:44He did.

01:07:44I'm taking full responsibility for my actions.

01:07:47Apparently, it was great for ratings for the network

01:07:49and they want to come back and cover the Carnival

01:07:50and the Spooky Alley.

01:07:51I think this could take our fundraiser to the next level.

01:07:54I think we should do it, guys.

01:07:55They lived here like five minutes.

01:07:57I'm just saying, you know,

01:07:58fundraising, you know, it's for the kids,

01:08:00but, you know, it still seems really fishy to me.

01:08:02I smell a conspiracy.

01:08:03Can't risk any more bad press.

01:08:05Guys, guys, guys, come on.

01:08:07It's time to help a prez out.

01:08:08Listen, when I had to relinquish my powers to my better half,

01:08:12I realized something.

01:08:14I realized that serving this community, it's a privilege.

01:08:19I let my anger get the best of me

01:08:21and I was a very poor example of how our leaders should be.

01:08:24Luckily, you guys cared about me enough to give me a second chance.

01:08:27Now it's our chance to come together as a community

01:08:30and a neighborhood and celebrate in front of the entire state of Utah.

01:08:34And a few select counties in Idaho, Wyoming, and Nevada,

01:08:38depending on local TV markets.

01:08:40Yes, Ned, not important, but sure.

01:08:43Yeah.

01:08:44The point is, it's time we back up our humble president

01:08:47and we show everyone what Halloween means to us.

01:08:51What do you say?

01:08:51Are you in?

01:08:52Yeah, I'm in.

01:08:53Ever scream on three.

01:08:54One, two, three.

01:08:55Ever scream!

01:09:01Oh, hey, did you ever bob for apples?

01:09:04Oh, you better believe it.

01:09:05Oh, well, we're on.

01:09:06Here we go.

01:09:15That way they call it bobbing for apples.

01:09:18Leave them alone.

01:09:18It'll keep them busy till naptime.

01:09:20Smart.

01:09:21Inflatables are not scary.

01:09:23And if they get unplugged, did you?

01:09:25I mean, the illusion is ruined.

01:09:27The idea is for the kids to have a good time,

01:09:29not sitting at home with night terrors.

01:09:31Look at this.

01:09:31It's horrifying.

01:09:32Okay, okay, we're gonna nix her and also the animatronic Chucky doll, but I'm keeping the homemade Babadook.

01:09:37Oh, keep the Babadook. Babadook.

01:09:39Guys, I'm a little worried about the costume contest. We don't have any sign-ups.

01:09:42I mean, my parents are a given. Jared said he's preparing something.

01:09:45Other than that, it is slow, and I'm just worried we won't have a lot of foot traffic, you know, for the spooky alley.

01:09:49I just hope the rumors aren't true.

01:09:51What rumors?

01:09:51Oh, I don't like to gossip, says a woman who invented the Avril Lavigne conspiracy.

01:09:56Oh, I have my reasons.

01:09:58And quite compelling evidence, I might add.

01:10:00Thank you. I don't care about that.

01:10:02Belinda, tell me what you heard. Please spill it.

01:10:04Honey, you gotta go listen. I don't know what they've been talking about.

01:10:06I'm scared.

01:10:07We've been gone for months. I don't care if you're scared. Grab a couple cans of them.

01:10:09All right.

01:10:10You know Mary Louise's hairdresser, Brittany Bateman?

01:10:12Girl can frost the topping. That's no rumor.

01:10:15Apparently, her sister-in-law, Heidi Birch, works out at Train Insane with none other than Ashlyn Ashworth.

01:10:22She said they're only covering the spooky alley for clickbait.

01:10:25What? Oh, I don't understand.

01:10:28She's hoping it's gonna be a train wreck, like the pumpkin contest.

01:10:31What do you got?

01:10:31I got nothing.

01:10:32And after what she posted about Pamela from the beastly bake-off.

01:10:36How do you suppose she heard about that, do you reckon?

01:10:38I've kept in touch with her mother. I didn't know the phone call was on the record.

01:10:43There was always something strange about Ashlyn.

01:10:45Didn't you tell me that when you were in high school, they called her schlin-shady?

01:10:49Yes, technically, but that was kind of my fault.

01:10:51I don't think she has an ulterior motive.

01:10:53Oh, really? You don't think she does?

01:10:54Oh, I hope so. But you know, after that first news piece went viral, it doesn't look like the rest of the neighborhood is so confident.

01:11:01Rumor or not, we can't let this thing fail. It's for charity now, and we're gonna prove everyone wrong.

01:11:05Yes.

01:11:06You know Marvin and I are all in. Thank you. I don't doubt it.

01:11:09And you can put Bob and I down, too. Yeah, we've been cooking up something that's electrifying.

01:11:14Really? What is that?

01:11:15You can put down DJ Frankenstein?

01:11:19Is that another word, Mary Louise? I do not want any spoilers.

01:11:24That's exactly what Jared said.

01:11:25He's not doing something with you?

01:11:26No, he insisted on doing something solo. What about you guys?

01:11:30Ned asked me to join up with him.

01:11:31Really? Where are you going us?

01:11:32I tell you, but he made me sign an airtight non-disclosure agreement.

01:11:35I will say, the stakes are very high with this one.

01:11:40What does airtight mean to you exactly?

01:11:42And what about you, Pamela?

01:11:43Don't ask. You know that Helen and I are ride or die.

01:11:46I wasn't asking to tag along. I have something very special up my sleeve anyway.

01:11:51Well, I hope that it's spooky, because we've got something that's gonna push that Nosferatu meter to a high five.

01:11:57Ah, yeah, touchdown, Bob!

01:12:02Now empty those tubs, because they're contaminated.

01:12:05You're a lucky lady, Mary Louise.

01:12:12I don't know why that keeps happening to you, Graham.

01:12:15You trying to tell me something?

01:12:19I don't know what the stress levels are like on the other side there, but let me tell you, they're getting pretty high around here.

01:12:25I'm just trying to balance it all.

01:12:27You know, Jared and the HOA and my work and all the activities, and I really just want to make you proud.

01:12:34She is proud.

01:12:36She is proud.

01:12:40You sure about that?

01:12:43Yeah.

01:12:46The whole neighborhood is.

01:12:48Especially me.

01:12:50I'm proud of you, too.

01:12:52Even after my near impeachment.

01:12:55Okay, so it wasn't exactly your brightest moment, but it did show me how much you care about your mom, and I love that about you.

01:13:03And I love everything about you.

01:13:04I gotta tell you, there was this moment at the bake-off when they announced my name as the winner.

01:13:17Mm-hmm.

01:13:17It was the first time I had heard someone else say it out loud.

01:13:22Emily Farnsworth.

01:13:24I just had this surge of joy and love, and it just filled my heart from bottom to top.

01:13:31That is, of course, until it was totally ruined when Pamela face-planted into the ground, but for a moment, it was perfect.

01:13:41I'm so proud to be married to you.

01:13:44Thank you for saying that.

01:13:45I needed to hear that.

01:13:50I feel like I was really good at being your boyfriend, your fiancé, and I feel like I'm dropping the ball a little as your husband.

01:13:57Oh, honey, come on.

01:13:59Marriage, this is new for both of us.

01:14:02I mean, there's no shame in needing practice.

01:14:04Yeah.

01:14:04I think if we're willing to be honest about what's going on inside, the good, the bad, the ugly, I think we'll be just fine.

01:14:15Yeah, I think so, too.

01:14:17I am a little worried about all these rumors that are going around about Ashlyn Ashworth.

01:14:21I just, I don't even know what to believe anymore.

01:14:24Even if they are true, so what?

01:14:25This entire neighborhood is pulling together, and if she thinks that we're going to fall apart on live TV, she's dead wrong.

01:14:33You're absolutely right.

01:14:34This neighborhood is so special, and if people don't get it, that's on them.

01:14:42You know what?

01:14:42I'm going to stay up and work on my book a little bit.

01:14:45Okay.

01:14:47You don't have to wait up.

01:14:48Like, all the time you need.

01:14:50Because I am planning a little surprise for us.

01:14:53Are you a good witch or a bad witch?

01:15:03I was going to ask you the same thing.

01:15:04Why?

01:15:05I'm clearly Glinda the Good.

01:15:06I know.

01:15:06Sorry.

01:15:06I don't know why I said that.

01:15:07You look cute, but what's with the headset?

01:15:10Well, somebody's got to run the show, so...

01:15:11I get that.

01:15:12I'm excited.

01:15:14Where's your husband?

01:15:15Oh, he's been out running errands for the carnival all day.

01:15:17I think he's waiting for the big reveal.

01:15:19He doesn't want anyone to see his costume until the last minute.

01:15:22I'll make sure the cameras are rolling.

01:15:24Okay.

01:15:25Yeah.

01:15:26Um, I should probably go.

01:15:27All right, thanks.

01:15:28Uh, Ty, let's get B-roll.

01:15:32Well, I know they say wickedness was never happiness, but this outfit begs to differ.

01:15:36You look amazing.

01:15:38Where is your costume?

01:15:40I told you it's a surprise.

01:15:41Okay, well, you better hurry up.

01:15:42I can't be seen with a Halloween humbug.

01:15:44I would not dream of it.

01:15:47I don't know what to think.

01:15:49I just can't tell if she's up to no good.

01:15:51It doesn't matter.

01:15:52Look at this cul-de-sac.

01:15:54You're literally surrounded by loved ones.

01:15:56You got this.

01:15:58There you go.

01:15:59Gotta go.

01:16:01Look who's coming.

01:16:02Oh, yeah.

01:16:07Hey, guys!

01:16:12Happy Halloween!

01:16:14See you later.

01:16:16Happy Halloween!

01:16:17Happy Halloween!

01:16:21Ah, good morning!

01:16:23What are you, 30?

01:16:24No, out of here.

01:16:25Out.

01:16:26You did my taxes last year.

01:16:27You can't trick or treat.

01:16:28You're too old.

01:16:30We are a boy.

01:16:31I'm afraid there's a dinosaur when I move in here.

01:16:34And don't come back!

01:16:36I'm here.

01:16:38I hope it picks up.

01:16:40I'm not worried.

01:16:42You think it has anything to do with pretty pink princess over there?

01:16:44I mean, I hope not.

01:16:45Oh, yeah.

01:16:46I see how it is.

01:16:47You don't show up for Helen's harp recital, but you make it to the Halloween party.

01:16:51Sorry, sis.

01:16:52You know, I can't pass up a good old-fashioned fright fester.

01:16:55It is a full moon, but keep the scares to a minimum.

01:16:59Emily will have you removed from the premises.

01:17:00It's true.

01:17:01I'm more Teen Wolf than full-blown Lycan.

01:17:03But Lycan is nerdy little brother-speak for werewolf.

01:17:06The lore is very important to me, especially at this time of year.

01:17:10Do you accept cashier's checks?

01:17:12Well, sure.

01:17:12I don't see why not.

01:17:14You're welcome.

01:17:15These are great, by the way.

01:17:17Yeah.

01:17:18All right, scare you guys later.

01:17:19Bucky, this isn't Costco.

01:17:21Those aren't free samples.

01:17:22No, no, no.

01:17:23Let him have it.

01:17:24Lycan or not, the man is generous.

01:17:27Who dares receive each other, as we shall make our grease and clamor roar upon his death?

01:17:49And now, straight from Transylvania, some dark magic from Dracula.

01:17:54I want to blow your mind.

01:17:59False face must hide with the false heart.

01:18:02Darth Known.

01:18:05I hope I haven't made a mistake.

01:18:12You are like me now, my love.

01:18:17All right, everybody.

01:18:18Let's give it up for DJ Frankenstein and his boo-fee.

01:18:22If you're looking at our costumes and you're feeling kind of jelly, I'll tell you a story

01:18:31by the Lady Mary Shelley.

01:18:32The stalens guarantee to send a shiver down your spine.

01:18:35It's about the one and only Dr. Frankenstein.

01:18:38He ignored his friends at school and didn't listen to his teachers.

01:18:41He went around his lab just to work on his creature.

01:18:44It took a bolt of lightning to bring the thing to life.

01:18:46And then when he was done, he started working on his wife.

01:18:49Dr. What?

01:18:50Dr. Dr. Dr. Frankenstein.

01:18:52Dr. Who?

01:18:53Dr. Dr. Dr. Frankenstein.

01:19:01Hey.

01:19:03Hey.

01:19:04I should have said this earlier, but I just wanted to thank you for your kindness.

01:19:08It meant a lot to Jared, and all of us, really, that you were willing to give us a second

01:19:14chance.

01:19:14Please, don't mention it.

01:19:16And I want to give you something.

01:19:17It's not totally finished, the dummy, but in the spirit of Everscream Lane, it's about

01:19:23a little scarecrow who loves the tricks of Halloween and a witch who loves the treats.

01:19:27And, well, they figure out that they can both have a happy Halloween.

01:19:32It's so cute.

01:19:33Oh, look.

01:19:34It's us.

01:19:35Who did this?

01:19:36Oh, I did it.

01:19:36Yeah, I did it.

01:19:39I, you know, this whole season has been full of ups and downs, but it's really inspired

01:19:44me to get back to doing what I love.

01:19:46And you were a huge part of that.

01:19:48I don't understand.

01:19:49You've just always known what you wanted, and you've gone for it, and I truly admired

01:19:54that.

01:19:54And I may have gotten a little sidetracked, but I realized I got to get back to doing what

01:19:58I love, which is writing books.

01:20:00Well, thank you for this.

01:20:03And thank you for what you said when you visited the studio.

01:20:06It really helped me put everything into perspective.

01:20:09I could have been a lot nicer to you as well.

01:20:13Maybe now we can start over?

01:20:15I'd really like that.

01:20:16Yeah?

01:20:17Yeah, I'd really like that.

01:20:19And just a heads up, you might want to send some more volunteers to the ticket booth.

01:20:24Oh, really?

01:20:25Well, I've been sharing the fun of my stories, and the word is really spreading.

01:20:28You're about to have a lot more visitors headed your way.

01:20:31Oh, thank you.

01:20:32We're ready for them.

01:20:33Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for our special guest, Nickelback on Elm Street.

01:20:38I love Nickelback.

01:20:40Give it up for the lead singer, Chatty Krueger!

01:20:48I realized when I was picking out this Chatty Krueger outfit, that was the old Jared thinking.

01:21:04Now I'm thinking as your husband.

01:21:07What I really wanted was something for us.

01:21:10That's what this is.

01:21:12What is this?

01:21:14Step into my lair.

01:21:15Oh, look at their costumes.

01:21:28Could they be more adorable?

01:21:31Someone surprised me with a couple's costume after all.

01:21:33I like this so much, I'm not going to take it off.

01:21:35I don't think I could take these off if I wanted to.

01:21:38Pamela sewed my shirt into my pants.

01:21:40Thanks again for making the fundraiser happen, guys.

01:21:42They are still counting donations, but we have already earned double what we did last time.

01:21:48We should get some mead!

01:21:50By the way, a courier dropped this off today.

01:21:53You were busy with your tape measure, so I told him I would give it to you.

01:21:55Okay, thanks.

01:21:57What's this?

01:21:58It's Velvet.

01:22:07I got in.

01:22:09We're going to Norway!

01:22:12That is if my wife and I agree after an in-depth discussion.

01:22:17There you go.

01:22:17Good day!

01:22:20Santa Academy!

01:22:22Okay, but tonight's not about Santa.

01:22:24We may only have a few hours left to celebrate before Christmas takes over, so...

01:22:29What do you say we give Halloween all we got?

01:22:32Happy Halloween!

01:22:33Happy Halloween!

01:22:34Halloween is cool!

01:22:38I'll have some.

01:22:41I'll have some.

01:22:41And thus began a new chapter in the story of Evergreen Lane.

01:22:45We became the annual go-to place for trick-or-treating, and the Spooky Alley fundraiser was a huge success.

01:22:52In order to keep the peace, we let Pamela and Helen win the costume contest.

01:22:56The excitement of my new children's book, along with Jared's loving support, gave me the confidence to quit my job and pursue writing full-time.

01:23:04I know what Graham Graham was trying to tell me.

01:23:08The true spirit of Halloween is about remembering the ones you love, and having fun in creating memories with those that are still here.

01:23:16If you can remember that, and pass the tradition on to the next generation, that spirit will never truly die.

01:23:23Let's get started.

01:23:36Let's get started.

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