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Gogglebox Australia - Season 22 Episode 7

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Fun
Transcript
00:00I got my thing tomorrow. What thing? My physio. Your physio is not tomorrow, it's on Wednesday.
00:06Now did you book it on Wednesday? Yes, you told me when Tuesday or Wednesday and I booked it on
00:10Wednesday and I told you it's Wednesday. Is mum your secretary? Are you embarrassed that you're
00:14like 40 years old and mum still books your physio appointments? And then when's the appointment
00:19with the gynaecologist? Every evening in Australia. What the hell's going on here?
00:24They're showing us a show. What's the point of watching it? TV reaches over 12 million of us.
00:29Oh, sorry. No, no. You can't help stupidity, can you? But have you ever wondered what other
00:35people are watching? No, this is a little bit too artsy-fartsy for me. Find out what people
00:40thought about what was on in the last seven days. Dad said it just keeps getting worse the
00:44longer this show goes on. Nothing like settling down to a bit of Aussie trash.
00:49This week, Love It or List It was back. God, she's making eyes with Andrew. Whoa.
00:54The only thing that could make her happier is if Andrew was shirtless on the couch.
00:57We caught the new Office spin-off. The Pepper. Oh, we're doing it again.
01:02And the premiere of... Top End Bub. We need to raise Bub here. Welcome to Darwin.
01:08You'll get used to the heat. Mitchell Street goes off on a Saturday night. So much to do
01:12in the Top End.
01:13Because I'm going to have the chicken. Have one, please.
01:24What was that? Is that the ceiling?
01:28Your corners. No.
01:31Do you believe these? Your corners fell.
01:34Just fell off. No. Oh my...
01:36What? See what happens when you don't pay the builders cash? See what happens?
01:40Wednesday on Foxtel, we settled in for...
01:43Love It or List It?
01:45Renaud and house porn all in one.
01:47I love it.
01:49And Andrew and Neil are back, helping Aussie home owners decide, will they...
01:53Love It or...
01:54List It?
01:55How beautiful it is to be in Mermaid Beach on the Gold Coast.
01:59Oh, the Gold Coast.
02:01I love the Gold Coast.
02:02This is like two minutes from our house.
02:04I'd rather catch syphilis than go there.
02:06OK, but for Vanessa and Tony at home, and right now, they're not on the same page.
02:11Hello.
02:12Hi, how are you going?
02:12Lovely to meet you both.
02:14Hello, neighbours.
02:15Wait, what?
02:16I literally live a few hundred metres down the street.
02:19Oh, he's a neighbour.
02:21I haven't seen him.
02:22Well, not to say that, like, we bought here to stalk you.
02:25Oh.
02:25But to say that I'm a huge fan, Andrew, is a...
02:28Oh my God.
02:29That's a little creepy.
02:30I mean, I'm a fan of Love It or List It.
02:33I don't know if I'm Make A T-Shirt fan.
02:35Come on in, Andrew.
02:36This will be the shortest tour you've ever had.
02:38So she's obviously on Team Andrew then.
02:40Yeah.
02:40Yep.
02:41But Tony wants to keep the house.
02:43He wants to love it.
02:44She wants to list it.
02:45I mean, the word that springs to mind when I walk in here is...
02:47Cluttered.
02:48Cramped.
02:49Compact.
02:49That means tiny.
02:50So it's too small for them.
02:52As beat shacks go, this is a really good one.
02:54Oh, she's making eyes with Andrew.
02:57Flirty, flirty on the skirty.
02:59So what's the renovation budget?
03:01Here we go.
03:01400 grand.
03:02400?
03:03$400,000.
03:05On a reno, people usually have $75,000.
03:09I have 40 bucks.
03:11I'm a happy man.
03:12Well, I bet you are.
03:13So what's property expert Andrew got to play with?
03:16Go on, give me your budget.
03:17$3 million.
03:19$3 million budget?
03:21Oh, good stuff.
03:22Yeah, there you go.
03:23Go and live overlooking the ocean.
03:25Man, you could live under the ocean for $3 million.
03:28But I've got the budget to keep them just where they are.
03:31$400,000, yeah.
03:33We're starting over with this cute beach property.
03:36Ugh.
03:37Okay, what are we doing?
03:38I reckon they're going to flip the order.
03:39I'm literally flipping the house from front to back.
03:42Hold ya.
03:42Flip the house.
03:43I'm excited about it.
03:45I'm excited about it.
03:46As am I.
03:47I just can't visualise her, that's all.
03:49Oh, she's very, very hard to please.
03:52Well, let's see if Andrew can please her with this first listing.
03:56Wow.
03:56It's not a bad view, is it?
03:58Holy moly!
03:59Oh, my God.
03:59Oh, my God.
04:00Okay.
04:00They're moving.
04:01Why would you ever renovate that old joint?
04:04Walk straight in, turnkey.
04:05What do you think?
04:07Oh, my God, she's giving Andrew the eyes.
04:10She loves him.
04:11I'm sorry, should we be watching this?
04:14Yeah, I don't know.
04:15Let's check out the next listing.
04:17Look at that.
04:18Wow.
04:18Have you noticed she's getting prettier with every new house inspection?
04:23Yes, yes.
04:24She's lost the glasses, she's glammed up.
04:27She's going to leave her husband for Andrew.
04:29That was her plan all along.
04:30Really?
04:31Mm-hmm.
04:31Okay, let's check out the last listing.
04:34This is what we're looking at.
04:36Oh, wow.
04:37Oh, it's gorgeous.
04:38Beautiful.
04:39Stunning.
04:40Look at that smile.
04:41The only thing that could make her happier is if Andrew was shirtless on the couch.
04:45Initial thoughts.
04:46She wants to be Mrs. Winter.
04:48You really have delivered.
04:49We love it.
04:50We want you to move in with us.
04:51Where's that contract, Andrew?
04:52Oh, my God.
04:53Oh, my God.
04:54Touchy, touchy.
04:55Jeez Louise.
04:56I think I need to sit down after that.
04:58She's frothing, dude.
05:00Why don't you go have a little look around?
05:01Andrew's saying to the producer, don't leave me alone with the chick again.
05:03While Andrew takes out a restraining order, let's see the results of Neil's reno.
05:09Wait to be wild.
05:10Bring it on.
05:11It's the big day.
05:12Transformation day.
05:13Have you noticed, now that she's with Neil, the glasses are back on and she dresses like
05:17she's an Amish woman.
05:19Holy cow.
05:21Wow.
05:21Oh, my God.
05:23Oh, my God.
05:23Wow.
05:26Holy shit.
05:28Nice.
05:29It looks like a whole brand new home.
05:31Oh.
05:33Oh.
05:35Oh.
05:36Oh.
05:36Oh.
05:36Oh.
05:37Oh.
05:37Oh.
05:37Oh.
05:38It's stunning.
05:38Now the reno's done, it's time for Vanessa and Tony to decide if they'll...
05:43Love it or list it.
05:44Have a little think.
05:45Because if you make the right decision, there might be a little special gift for you, Vanessa.
05:48Oh.
05:49Andrew's got a special gift.
05:50He's trying to bribe them.
05:51I think he's trying to pick her up.
05:52Oh, you'll do anything it takes.
05:54Whoa.
05:54Are they going to be hooking up later?
05:58Wow.
05:58It is the Gold Coast.
06:00Mm-hmm.
06:01Vanessa and Tony, are you going to...
06:03Love it or...
06:05List it.
06:06We have decided.
06:07Love it.
06:07List it.
06:08Love it.
06:08List it.
06:09Love it.
06:10Yay!
06:11They're staying.
06:13I'm going to share the gift.
06:15Okay.
06:15What is it?
06:16Do you reckon it's a new t-shirt?
06:18Please.
06:19Please display.
06:20Is that Andrew on a...
06:21That's Andrew's face.
06:22On a robe.
06:23Oh, my God.
06:25It's a bit suggestive.
06:26I will wear this with pride.
06:28That's a bit creepy.
06:30Look at this.
06:31This is beautiful.
06:32It is.
06:32Look at that.
06:33It's a mermaid beach swingers party.
06:36Now, if I was the husband, maybe I would move.
06:38Knowing that those two are so close together.
06:40Both in mermaid.
06:41Mm-hmm.
06:41You know, I went to Best and List and I brought a pair of bras.
06:55And they wanted to charge me $2 for a bag.
06:59So I said, oh, bugger that.
07:00And I just put them over me shoulder.
07:02So I walked around, bloody valley, with me bra over me shoulder.
07:06We're doing the protest.
07:06Monday on 10, we tried our luck with...
07:09Golden cases.
07:10Let's go, baby.
07:12It's time to play Deal.
07:14Oh, no Deal.
07:16Is the little leprechaun store hosting?
07:17Here's your host, Grant Denyer.
07:21Yes, he is.
07:22There's my Grant.
07:24Where are you?
07:25Evie Hildebrand.
07:28There you are.
07:29Come on down.
07:30I can feel my fingers buzzing.
07:31I love how Grant can just adapt to any personality.
07:37I just love how someone that's gone on the stage is actually shorter than him.
07:40Look at all that money sitting there.
07:42If you can, like, pick the $100,000.
07:44I reckon she's going to pick $28,000.
07:46See, in my head, I'll put $27,000.
07:47There's 22 cases, right?
07:49Well, it goes up to $22,000.
07:50Oh, we're going well.
07:51In case you don't know, here's how it works.
07:53Evie hopes the case she chooses...
07:55Lucky number four.
07:57...contains the most money.
07:58So you want $100,000 in number four.
08:00Malik, which suitcase would you pick?
08:02One.
08:02Now Evie hopes the cases she eliminates contain lower amounts.
08:07You wanted the blues first, but you don't want no greens.
08:09I'm going to go one.
08:11Oh!
08:12Oh!
08:13No!
08:14I'm going to answer it straight away!
08:16That is rough!
08:18Malik picked $100,000.
08:20He does it every time!
08:22That's it.
08:22We're going to the casino.
08:24The kid's a freak.
08:25I think I'm going to need you to touch me crystal now.
08:27Oh, my gosh, here's a crystal person.
08:29Only white women believe in the transformative power of crystals.
08:32It'll all be fine.
08:33The aura, the energy is awful.
08:34I'm going to go 21.
08:36Come on, give me a blue.
08:38Don't get the green.
08:39Oh, my God!
08:40Oh, my God!
08:42She's having the worst run ever.
08:44The whole crystal community is going to cancel her.
08:47The bloody hell's happening, Dad.
08:49I don't know, mate.
08:49Can I only go up here or from here, though?
08:51She might have the $75,000 in her case.
08:53Yeah.
08:53How would that change your life?
08:54I'd buy a new gold detector.
08:57What?
08:58This girl just wants to get rich quick.
09:00Yeah, double me money.
09:01I think maybe she just needs to get a job.
09:03Here's your banker with his first offer.
09:05As the game progresses, the bank tries to tempt Evie with a deal.
09:09Oh.
09:10That is terrible.
09:12No deal!
09:13No deal!
09:15No deal!
09:16That crystal's making her possessed.
09:18Where are you guys from?
09:19Oh, Flourdale, massive bush town.
09:22We were in the Black Saturday bushfires and that took everything.
09:25Oh.
09:26They lost their house to the fire.
09:27Maybe that's family's jinx.
09:29Did you have enough time to grab the animals when the fire came?
09:31The cat being the cat obviously doesn't come when it's called,
09:34but she survived.
09:36Oh, that's really lovely.
09:37Cats can survive everything.
09:40Mum ran it over.
09:41Oh!
09:42It survived the fires and then her mother runs it over.
09:45Told you they're jinxed.
09:47OK, let's see if Evie's luck can change.
09:49You need the blue, blue, blue.
09:51Give it to us.
09:52Yes!
09:53Yes!
09:54That is pretty much.
09:56Oh!
09:56It's inside, it is.
09:58It's a blue!
09:59Got a comeback going on.
10:01Bank off.
10:01Oh, here we go.
10:02Show me the money.
10:0319,004.
10:05You have to take the money and get out of there.
10:08But she could have 75 in her case.
10:11Well, it could be five bucks.
10:12Take the money.
10:13Take it.
10:13It's the most money you're going to get.
10:15No deal!
10:17No deal!
10:18Oh, my God!
10:19She gives me the jitters.
10:21I think she just likes saying no deal.
10:23Good luck, darling.
10:24Wish you all the best.
10:25One case to open.
10:26Come on.
10:27I'm going to go with number six.
10:28Here we go.
10:29Five dollars.
10:30Five dollars.
10:30If she knocks out the 75k, she's stuffed.
10:33Oh, God.
10:34Oh, God.
10:34Oh, God.
10:35Oh, God.
10:37Oh, God!
10:38Oh, God!
10:39God, God, God, God, God, God, God, God!
10:42Disaster.
10:42Your final offer is...
10:44Oh, my God.
10:46Nah, 7,000 is shit.
10:48Go for the 20.
10:48What do you reckon, Dad?
10:50You come a long way this morning.
10:51Go for the 20k.
10:53Now, take the seven grand.
10:54No deal!
10:56No deal!
10:57Yes!
10:58No deal!
10:59Come on, last one.
11:00Buy the crystal.
11:01Yeah, just give it a little.
11:02Yeah.
11:02The crystals aren't going to help you now.
11:04That crystal is broken.
11:05Maybe her mum ran it over with the car.
11:07Do you have five dollars?
11:11Evie, Evie, Evie!
11:13Or $20,000?
11:14Come on, get the 20.
11:15Get the 20.
11:16Fingers and toes, doll.
11:16Fingers and toes.
11:17Inside!
11:18Come on, give us red.
11:20Give us red.
11:20Don't be blue.
11:21Don't be blue.
11:23Come on, doll.
11:2420.
11:25Open it!
11:28Get it!
11:29Oh!
11:29You got it!
11:30Yeah!
11:31You did it!
11:33Three grand!
11:33I'm getting that gold detector!
11:36Good on her.
11:37She deserves it.
11:39Say goodbye.
11:39See you, Shredder.
11:41I loved your laundry deal.
11:43That was good.
11:44I love when people win money.
11:45Now everyone's going to be going on the show with Crystal.
11:57In Melbourne, Adam's just back from a quick trip to Italy.
12:00It was the most UN wedding that I've ever been to.
12:04There were people from Australia, Mexico, Kenya, Italy, England, France, Spain, Portugal,
12:12the Netherlands and Finland.
12:14So when they did the speech and they went, oh, we want to thank Adam for coming from Australia,
12:19everyone else was like, so?
12:20Sunday on Prime, we celebrated James Bond Day with the new season of 007.
12:31Road to a Million.
12:32What is this?
12:34It's got to be something to do with 007.
12:37Well, that's a start.
12:39It's a James Bond reality competition.
12:42That's better.
12:43The show follows eight teams of two as they travel around the world, completing a series
12:49of spy-themed challenges in the race for a cash prize.
12:53It's like James Bond meets Amazing Race on crack.
12:58Pretty much.
12:59Bungie jumping off a dam.
13:00Oh, my God.
13:02Who would do that?
13:02I would do it.
13:04You would not, you lawyer.
13:06I would do that if we're in a show.
13:09This is cool, as.
13:10This is cool.
13:11It's like everyone's kind of trying out James Bond stuff.
13:14The name's Dalton.
13:15Matt Dalton.
13:17Nuntala.
13:18Chad Nuntala.
13:19Doesn't quite have the same ring to it.
13:21Look, let's just meet the man who will be pulling the strings.
13:24Okay.
13:25It's the guy from Succession.
13:26Let's get on with it.
13:27Brian Cox.
13:28Looks like Colonel Sanders.
13:30Could this be the search for the 11 secret herbs and spices?
13:33No, they're after an even juicier prize than that.
13:36One million pounds.
13:38One million pounds.
13:39That looks like a mediation room in the Supreme Court.
13:42Good to know.
13:43Anyway, in this episode, the contestants are off to...
13:47Thailand.
13:48Thailand.
13:49Oh, straight to Patia.
13:50Woof, woof, woof, woof.
13:52First pair of best friends, Ricky and Noddy.
13:54You know what?
13:55We'd actually be a pretty good team on this.
13:58Why?
13:58It'd be like the muscle and the brains.
14:01Just got to grow some muscles.
14:02Yep.
14:02Second pair, husband and wife, Sid and Shabina.
14:06Those two remind me of mum and dad.
14:08Okay.
14:08They're going to be crap.
14:09And the final pair are sisters, Kat and Maya.
14:12Kat and Maya are going to be useless.
14:14Sorry, like she's wearing a halter neck.
14:15Your first mission is to retrieve a hard drive...
14:18..and upload its contents back to me.
14:22All right, so we've got to find the hard drive.
14:23So the problem is, Kate, you wouldn't know how to upload it.
14:25Wouldn't know how to turn it on.
14:27The teams will complete the challenges in a time trial,
14:30with the slowest team up for elimination.
14:32Start the clock.
14:34Oh, here we go.
14:35Now, go to Lamsay and locate goodnight.
14:39I wonder who the goodnight is, then.
14:40Who's goodnight?
14:41Goodnight must be a restaurant.
14:43No, it's a person.
14:44Do you know goodnight?
14:45Is it a bar, a club, or somewhere to have a goodnight?
14:49Goodnight.
14:50Goodnight.
14:51Goodnight.
14:51Oh, the police found it.
14:53Goodnight, the boat.
14:54Off they go.
14:56Here we go.
14:58Come on, skipper.
14:59You know what's the least James Bond thing ever?
15:01What?
15:01Having to wear life jackets.
15:03James Bond has never worn a life jacket in his entire life.
15:06The other teams also quickly locate the boat.
15:08But as for Sid and Shabina...
15:10Anything?
15:11No, I can't see anything.
15:12Oh, my God!
15:13It's right there!
15:14Got it, got it, got it!
15:15Where?
15:15Here.
15:15Oh, my God.
15:17Producer Siddy telling them.
15:20So, stop.
15:21What you are looking for is on the other boat.
15:24I think that means we've got to swim.
15:25They have to swim over.
15:26British people can't swim.
15:27Oh, give them a chance.
15:28I'm sure it won't be that bad.
15:30Oh, never mind.
15:31Oh, my God.
15:31He's going to die.
15:32You're doing really good, Sid.
15:33Go for it.
15:34That's like Ethan's swimming.
15:36Sid does manage to drag himself on board.
15:40Look, he's dead.
15:41Nah, he's okay.
15:42Oh.
15:43Once on board, the teams need to retrieve the SD card.
15:48Oh!
15:49It's the hard drive with the scorpions.
15:50Tell me they have to put their hand in that.
15:53Go, go, go, go.
15:55Oh, wow!
15:57Just reached it and then took it.
15:58These guys are picking these things like they're potatoes.
16:00But as for Sid and Shabina...
16:02I think you should do it.
16:04Oh, my God!
16:05Give him a whack!
16:06OK, so what are you going to do then?
16:08I'll help you put him in the box.
16:10Oh, my God!
16:11Put it on his head!
16:13Mum!
16:13I'll do the easy bit.
16:14Oh, he just...
16:15Oh, good.
16:16He's the worst husband.
16:18This guy reminds me of Dad.
16:20And now they need to upload the contents of the SD card to a server.
16:24Send files and a password.
16:27Hint.
16:27Ace.
16:28Kiss.
16:28Ace Kiss.
16:29Is it an anagram?
16:31Kissass.
16:32Ace Kiss.
16:33Casino Royale.
16:34Ace what?
16:35Ace Freely.
16:36You know, from Kiss.
16:38Stop it.
16:39Cecik!
16:40What?
16:41That is so dumb.
16:43Anyway, as for Sid and Shabina...
16:45Could it be smacker?
16:46No, wrong.
16:47Bloody hopeless.
16:48Cecik!
16:49Hey!
16:50With the mission complete, let's find out who's up for elimination.
16:54I think we've done enough.
16:55They're on the Long Island iced tea.
16:56They're drinking cocktails already.
16:58We're Brits in Thailand.
16:59What else are we going to do?
17:00The first pair to face elimination is...
17:03Sid and Shabina.
17:04Sid and Shabina.
17:05Goodbye, Sid.
17:07Oh!
17:09Why do they do that?
17:12That was amazing, that race.
17:13You know what?
17:14I'm happy to live my life without knowing.
17:17Really?
17:17I liked it.
17:18I think I'm just not into James Bond.
17:20I reckon James Bond lovers would froth that.
17:24This is sick.
17:26I'm frothing this.
17:27I was sitting at my desk today, had my headphones in, and then I turned around and the whole
17:47office is empty.
17:47I'm like, what's going on?
17:48And then I took my earpods out.
17:50The alarms are going off.
17:51Oh!
17:51I got a good phone call this afternoon that my husband died.
17:55What was he doing?
17:56Oh, he was listening to Britney Spears while the building was burning down?
18:02I love Below Deck.
18:04Welcome to paradise.
18:05It's got a lot of rich people.
18:07There's always a lot of alcohol.
18:08And there's always drama.
18:09Thank you very much for that.
18:10Oh, Captain Kerry.
18:12We love to see an Aussie represent.
18:14Where are we?
18:15We're going to head across to the French side of St. Martin.
18:17St. Martin.
18:19It really is paradise.
18:20He kind of looks like Jeff Bezos.
18:21Yeah, except Jeff Bezos owns the boat.
18:24All crew, all crew.
18:25Ten minutes to guests' arrival.
18:26Copy that.
18:27Battle stations.
18:28Who have we got on board?
18:29Say my name from the top.
18:31Oh, trash.
18:33These are my dear friends.
18:34But we do all work together in retail lingerie.
18:37Retail lingerie.
18:38Oh, I hope they're not going to be wearing it on the boat.
18:40Beautiful!
18:41This is like the entire cast of next season's botched.
18:44Righto, time to set sail.
18:46But remember...
18:47When we are moving or when we are docking, it's of prime importance that we are not out on deck.
18:53Do you reckon anyone will be on the deck?
18:55100%.
18:55Fraser, we've got guests on deck here.
18:58Of course, we've got rule breakers.
19:00Yeah, that's narrow.
19:01It's very narrow.
19:02He's trying to concentrate.
19:03These guys talk to him.
19:04I assume they open it up when you get there, right?
19:07Yeah.
19:07This reminds me of the other day.
19:09Trying to reverse park, and I had the missus going.
19:12Every time I hit the gutter, she was like, nope.
19:14It's obviously a drop, you're trying.
19:15Yeah.
19:16And I'd go forward.
19:17I'd go back.
19:18I'd hit it again.
19:18Nope.
19:19The best viewers from upstairs.
19:20Yeah.
19:21Piss off, mate.
19:22This is stupid.
19:23Oh, are they going to fit?
19:23We're a basic away from that bridge.
19:26Ooh, tight squeeze.
19:28We've got about two metres distance on four sides.
19:31Why don't they just move to the right a bit?
19:33Close and one near.
19:34Ooh.
19:35Your turn is now clear of the bridge gate.
19:38Oh, they got through.
19:39Good on you, Captain Kerry.
19:40Thank you, everyone.
19:41It would have been like a pinball machine if that was me.
19:43I can't have guests on the deck when I'm going to the bridge.
19:46I'll steal it.
19:47It doesn't work that way.
19:48No, because normally they're all inside drinking.
19:51Pour me another drink.
19:52Oh, they are.
19:54First day fever and an open bar, it's playtime.
19:57Especially for Kelly.
19:59My favourite drink is the next one.
20:00Fair.
20:01Woo!
20:02Kelly looks like Ozzy Osbourne.
20:05Kelly.
20:06Woo!
20:07Kelly, they're loaded already.
20:08Kelly, pump the brakes.
20:11I'm ready for Jack Daniels.
20:12She's ready for bed.
20:14Take more champagne if you have it.
20:15She needs to eat.
20:16I don't want to eat anymore.
20:17I just want to drink.
20:18Cut her off.
20:19She's the drunk auntie at the wedding.
20:20And this auntie has somewhere to be.
20:22I'm going on the banana boat.
20:24Banana boat, baby, yeah.
20:25No, no banana boat for you, Kelly.
20:27I want banana boat.
20:28Take on the tender.
20:29Is this not a safety issue?
20:31I want to do the banana boat.
20:32She'll go overboard and drown.
20:34If someone doesn't push her off first.
20:35You've had a lot to drink.
20:36I'm worried about your safety.
20:37Well, she'd float with all the Botox anyway.
20:40Help me put it on.
20:41Yeah, I'll help you put it on.
20:43Oh, my God.
20:45Okay.
20:46We'll play that game, are we?
20:47No, she's in the water.
20:48Pack up, we're going.
20:50Come chase me.
20:51Come chase me.
20:52Back on the boat, please.
20:56My luck is many luck, I idiot.
20:58Do they have a below deck prison?
21:00I'm going to call your authorities
21:01and have you taken off the vessel
21:02if you don't listen to me right now.
21:03Go back inside now.
21:04Oh, my God.
21:05I've never seen someone cut off
21:07from the ocean before.
21:09I can do whatever I want.
21:10No, you can't.
21:11I can.
21:12You cannot.
21:12Who does she think she is?
21:14Taser her.
21:15Come on, New York.
21:16There's First Day Fever
21:17and there's Kelly.
21:19They're assholes.
21:20They're fucking assholes.
21:21No, they're not.
21:22Yes, they are.
21:23They're fucking assholes.
21:24Even Yoshi's getting upset with her.
21:26They're fucking Democrats.
21:28Democrats.
21:29They're Democrats?
21:29Democrats?
21:30Of course she's Republican.
21:32And I have the FBI in my family.
21:35I have the FBI.
21:36Oh, yes.
21:37There's one I throw you on this boat
21:38and it's me.
21:39You tell them, Captain.
21:40I would call the police.
21:41I've got a guest that's very drunk.
21:43Yes.
21:44And I've got to get her off the boat.
21:45He's kicking her off.
21:46Yes!
21:47I asked you to stay in the room for half an hour.
21:49Ask you to talk to me on private, please.
21:52We're going to send her off.
21:53It's fine.
21:55I'll come back in 20 minutes.
21:5620 minutes.
21:59Yeah!
22:01That's how you do it.
22:02Why did you lock me in a room?
22:04Bye, Kelly.
22:07Don't end.
22:08Oh, my gosh.
22:09I want to see what happens to bloody Kelly.
22:11You could imagine her waking up.
22:13She's like, oh, why am I still on land?
22:16What happened yesterday?
22:28In Sydney, Laney has a bee in her bonnet.
22:31It's when people say, we're really trying for a baby.
22:34And it's never from people you're real close to, either.
22:36It's like middle-aged women who you work with that are like, we're really trying for a second.
22:40How hard are we trying, Linda?
22:43Specifically, you're doing Linda, you're doing the headstand after.
22:45You're literally just letting gravity do its work.
22:47This week on Aunty, we watched...
22:51Oh, back road.
22:53Grab your four-wheel drive, we are getting on the dirt roads.
22:56I don't mind watching this, because they go to all the places that you never go to, so you see what they're like.
23:00And you probably end up never going there anyway.
23:02Probably not, but where are we off to today?
23:04Well, it's a little town in South Australia called...
23:06Lucendale.
23:08Lucendale?
23:08Where's Lucendale?
23:09Just west of Narrakoot, just east of Kingston.
23:12If you go to Keith, you've gone too far.
23:14I've been to Victor Harbour in South Australia.
23:16That's nice.
23:17Anyway.
23:18My arrival into Lucendale all seems very normal.
23:22Lucendale has a population of 288.
23:25Oh my God, that's like a Lebanese wedding.
23:28I've arrived smack bang into the mayhem of Lucendale's B&S Ball.
23:33A bachelor of spinsters.
23:35Kate, we went to one of those about 30 years ago.
23:38Were you single or were you guys dating?
23:40We were single.
23:41Everyone was single.
23:42Mum was single.
23:44It's called the Yakka Whacka Ball.
23:46The Yakka Whacka Ball.
23:50This is my kind of ball.
23:51I'm so glad I'm not straight.
23:53I now want to find out what I have been missing out on.
23:57Mullet City.
23:58Mullet is an Aussie thing, isn't it?
24:00Mm-hmm.
24:00Oh, but then ask Billy Ray Cyrus and he'd beg to differ differently.
24:04Um, okay, sure.
24:06I've never seen so many utes in all my life.
24:08Really?
24:08She didn't think she'd see a lot of utes?
24:10Do you know he's with, um, what's her name now?
24:12Yeah, the Aussie one.
24:13No.
24:14Isn't it the Aussie chick?
24:15No.
24:15English.
24:16Anyway, back to the ball.
24:17And were designed to overcome the tyranny of distance.
24:20So it started off to get youngsters in the country to all link up.
24:24Oh, yes.
24:26She was with Shane Warne.
24:27What's her name?
24:27Yeah, what's her face?
24:28Liz Hurley.
24:29Liz Hurley.
24:29What an unusual match.
24:31Mm.
24:31Right-o.
24:32Glad we cleared that up.
24:33Which made it hard for young country folk to find a partner.
24:36Oh, it's where you come to find a mate.
24:38So it's Tinder in person.
24:40But then she went with Shane, too.
24:41That was unusual, too, at the time.
24:43I think Shane was better looking than him.
24:46He must have a big dick.
24:47Moving on.
24:48What is good about V&S's?
24:49Oh, it's the looseness.
24:50You can just drink as much as you want.
24:52We're all getting pregnant tonight.
24:54In nine months, Lucendale has just doubled its population.
24:58It actually looks like a great time.
25:00I couldn't think of anything worse, Sarah.
25:03There's some wild entertainment out in the car park.
25:06Ute circle work.
25:07Ute circle work.
25:08Actually, maybe I changed my mind.
25:11Of course only blokes are doing it.
25:12Most of the stupidest things in the world, Keith,
25:15you'll see blokes doing it.
25:16Tell you what, I might take my dad's ute out
25:18and just go rip it and punch bowl oval.
25:19There's another equally impressive,
25:22but perhaps slightly less wild side to this town,
25:25the South East Field Days.
25:27Did she say Field Days?
25:29She sure did.
25:30Oh.
25:30A massive agricultural trade show.
25:33It's just like the Easter show, but for Bogans.
25:35To be fair, that's also for Bogans.
25:36There's nothing like a good field day in a small town.
25:39Let me tell you what's happening.
25:41Free hearing tests in the Lions Pavilion.
25:44And what?
25:44Free hearing tests?
25:46Sign me up, baby.
25:47Test your skill at the laser tag.
25:50Laser tag?
25:51Dude, I'm moving to this town.
25:53All that stuff is happening.
25:55Be there.
25:55Did she need a script to remember those two events?
25:58You got the hearing test and the laser.
26:01Okay, what else have I got?
26:03Well, how about we head to the agricultural school?
26:05Okay.
26:06This unique school is known for teaching kids farm-based skills.
26:10I would love my kids to learn stuff like this.
26:13You know, when I was at school, I had a little chicken when I hatched it.
26:17Mm.
26:17We took it home.
26:18We had to mother it.
26:19Mm.
26:20Cultivating their interest in agriculture.
26:23Excuse me?
26:23Did you order it for dinner?
26:25A lot of that probably happened at the B&S ball too.
26:28Then I went away to Adelaide and when I got back, I said to my mum, because it turned
26:31into a hen by then, I said to my mum, where's my chicken?
26:34In the pot.
26:36Oh.
26:37She killed it and cooked it.
26:38I was so angry with her.
26:39That's terrible.
26:41My ear sore here and I don't know why.
26:43Yeah, you said that the other day too.
26:45The Lucendale Field Days traditionally ends with a party.
26:53Oh my God.
26:54Can you wake me up before you go-go?
26:56Geez, I reckon we've seen absolutely everything there is to see in Lucendale.
27:00Well, not everything.
27:02The next morning, Steph needs to make sure the kilometres of bunting are rolled up.
27:07Oh my God.
27:08You're watching someone fold up a flag.
27:10Why are they showing us this crap?
27:11Yep.
27:14Don't drop it.
27:15Don't drop it.
27:15Oh my God.
27:17Get me out of this hellhole.
27:20I don't mind.
27:21I like watching shows like that.
27:22Well, you can always watch them by yourself.
27:24We can downsize and go live in there, Lee.
27:27We'll get a dog.
27:28The door's there.
27:29Your car's out the front.
27:30Your keys are over there.
27:31Go for your life.
27:32Don't tempt me.
27:32I am not upset that you're into the habit of cleaning your feet now.
27:52That is really bad, though.
27:54I just got home from freaking camping for the last three days.
27:57Why don't you shower or wear shoes or any of the above?
28:00You don't do that when you're camping.
28:02So you haven't showered since you've been home?
28:05I haven't showered since I left.
28:07This week on Prime...
28:12No, there's no precedent for that.
28:13Miranda Tapsell.
28:15She's a good actress.
28:15I like her.
28:16Well, if the husband wants to appeal, then he needs to stop messing her around and comply
28:19with the court order.
28:20We love Miranda.
28:21Well, that's good, because she's now the lead in a new Aussie drama.
28:25Top End Bub.
28:26Oh, Miranda Tapsell created it.
28:28This is a spin-off of the movie Top End Wedding.
28:30That's right.
28:31And the first episode reintroduces her playing Lauren, an up-and-coming lawyer married to
28:36Ned, a cafe owner.
28:38Spake me later and we'll be even.
28:40Oh!
28:41So this is where the bub comes from?
28:42Not yet.
28:43First comes a phone call about her sister.
28:46Lauren.
28:47Oh, shit.
28:48Bad news.
28:49Someone's dead.
28:50It's Renelle.
28:51They are so close.
28:55This is not the phone call you ever want to receive.
28:58And the news of her sister's passing takes her and Ned back up to the Top End.
29:04Oh, have a look at this bus.
29:08That's her dad.
29:09Hey, in you go.
29:11This what?
29:11Out of all the money she makes, she couldn't just get a taxi?
29:14You can't put a price on freedom, love.
29:16That'll be something that would hire for us to travel in.
29:19It's beautiful.
29:21Oh.
29:22Welcome to Darwin.
29:23All right, Ned.
29:24Down she get.
29:25You're looking after Bub.
29:26Me?
29:27Oh.
29:28Where are you going?
29:29Sorry business.
29:30There's mum.
29:31It's such a beautiful term, sorry business, to describe that death and mourning period.
29:35Renelle's arrangement.
29:37Don't know which task I'd rather do.
29:40Look after a young child or going to the morgue.
29:42Both are equally gruelling.
29:44Oi!
29:46Oh, hi.
29:47So this must be Lauren's niece whose mum just died.
29:51There's the bub.
29:52What do you want to do?
29:53All right, Uncle Ned and Bub.
29:55Quality time.
29:56And when the family returns...
29:58Woo!
29:58Hi.
29:59Ned's had a makeover.
30:01Dana, how you doing?
30:02How can you take him seriously?
30:04Pink, I'm cool, but don't worry, I have salmon.
30:10I'm meeting the arm.
30:14Hey.
30:16Oh, it's a darling.
30:17And later that night, Ned learns a little bit more about Lauren's culture.
30:22And since Lauren is Renelle's sister...
30:24Okay, yeah, but weren't Renelle and Lauren cousins?
30:27No, that's Western way, see?
30:29I'm talking about if Renelle was my brother's daughter, then they'd be cousins.
30:34But she's not.
30:35Renelle was my sister's kid, which makes her my daughter.
30:38So them two girls are same for us.
30:41I think he's just as confused as us.
30:43So she's saying, because it's the daughter of the sister, the two sisters essentially play the same role.
30:48So Bub should be calling Lauren mum.
30:50Yeah.
30:51Oh.
30:51But it's like a metaphorical thing, right?
30:56Nothing metaphorical about it.
30:57What they're saying is Bub's our responsibility now.
31:00Because her sister passed on, she's got to look after her.
31:04Well, there now, you want her to get it with the black woman?
31:07Mm-hmm.
31:07You know, follow those black rules now, brother.
31:09Think how long it took you to go out on your own.
31:11Do you really want to throw all that away?
31:12No, of course not.
31:13All the money that we put into the cafe sunk.
31:15It's a lot.
31:16It's a lot to take on.
31:17Suddenly, then you have to take on a child.
31:19It's so different from Mob, eh?
31:20Like, without saying.
31:21You don't even question it.
31:22It's just like, yes, we'll take it.
31:24It's what Elmo do.
31:26We share the load.
31:27Like, if anything happened to you, I would gladly adopt your chihuahuas.
31:32Why don't we support Bub in different ways financially?
31:35You know, pay her school fees.
31:37They're very selfish.
31:38I'm not happy with him.
31:39But look at her.
31:40That would be me.
31:41Look at her.
31:43Slowly creeping head.
31:45How can you say no to that face?
31:47But kids are always great when they're asleep.
31:49It's when they wake up, you have problems.
31:52Where's he going?
31:53I booked the return flight for tonight, remember?
31:56No, he's bailing out.
31:58Ronell is family.
31:59Bub is family.
32:00You are family.
32:01Everyone loves interracial relationships until it comes to difference in cultural obligations.
32:08We need to raise Bub here.
32:09We don't have to like it.
32:11But this is what our family needs from us.
32:13He thinks he gets to have a say in this.
32:15I'm not sure of it.
32:16Is he going to leave?
32:17Daddy, you can just be.
32:20Oh, no, Ned.
32:23Well, no words can suffice.
32:25You'll get used to the heat.
32:27Mitchell Street goes off on a Saturday night.
32:29So much to do in the top end.
32:31You want it to now.
32:33I'm putting $2 million at the fact that he's going to walk in this house within 30 seconds.
32:40Here he comes.
32:41$2 million.
32:45Glad he came back.
32:46He just needed a moment.
32:48He's all right.
32:49They'll make it work.
32:50Just a reminder that everyone can see everything.
32:55My kiddies.
32:57Welcome to Darwin.
33:01What do you think of that?
33:03That was really, really good.
33:05I really enjoyed this.
33:06That was very wholesome.
33:07Not enough crocodiles for mine, though.
33:09Not yet.
33:10It's a slow burn.
33:11I think you watch it and then you grow to love it.
33:13So we've gone up for the sunrise this morning.
33:30Wholesome.
33:30Well, it wasn't to enjoy the scenery.
33:32It was to stalk a football team.
33:34No, that's so embarrassing.
33:36That's so embarrassing.
33:37But we found them.
33:38But we found them.
33:38And then what?
33:39And we watched them swim.
33:40No, that's so embarrassing.
33:41That's stalking.
33:43I fear we may have an EBO very soon.
33:45Yes.
33:45But do you want to come next time?
33:46No.
33:47You'll let me know when they're at the pub.
33:48A bit later in the day.
33:49Okay.
33:51Take a look at this.
33:52This week on Apple TV.
33:54I'm the living example of Better Late Than Never.
33:58Oh, this fella.
33:58This guy's the dad from American Pie.
34:00And then he was on that other show where he had a family and stuff.
34:04Schitt's Creek was so funny.
34:05Yeah, I started watching it, but then I forgot about it.
34:09Oh, Eugene Levy.
34:10The Reluctant Traveller.
34:12I like it.
34:13Does that just mean grumpy?
34:14Yeah.
34:14Don't take this the wrong way, but this is a horrible ride.
34:18Tick that off the bucket list.
34:20Boomers love to travel now, don't they?
34:22Mate, they love it.
34:22They just cash in their investment property and see the world.
34:25That would be great.
34:26I would love that.
34:27I've spent very little time in Louisiana.
34:30Oh, he's down south.
34:31It is my first RV trip.
34:33Matt, would you let me drive if we were going RVing?
34:36He doesn't really let you drive in Melbourne.
34:38So I'm trying to figure out what the appeal is.
34:41And that's what we always say to you.
34:42I say, let's drive.
34:43Let's see places.
34:44Heath, I can't even get you to stop the car for me to go for a pee.
34:46Yeah, but I'll...
34:47Until I say to you, it's either you stop or I'll pee in the car.
34:50Okay, next time I'll stop.
34:52Hey, Eugene.
34:52Don't tell me.
34:53Will the RV guy.
34:54I am the RV guy.
34:55Will the RV guy.
34:57Will looks like a happy chappy.
34:59Hey, you're kind of tall.
34:59Good.
35:01Tall?
35:01All right, time to hit the road.
35:04Louisiana has a unique geography.
35:07Louisiana, Matt, you've been there?
35:09I've been there, Kate.
35:10Our three-day trip through southern Louisiana will start in the swamps before finishing at
35:16the mighty Mississippi in New Orleans.
35:19Can I tell you a fun fact of what happened in New Orleans?
35:21What?
35:21Don't say it didn't happen.
35:22It did.
35:23I got shot at.
35:24Did you?
35:25Bullshit.
35:25Never heard this story in my life.
35:27I'm telling you now.
35:28You can't come to south Louisiana without doing a swamp tour.
35:32I would absolutely love to go on a swamp tour.
35:35All right, here we go.
35:37But I don't know.
35:38I still get funny about those white people down in the deep south that just blow us straight
35:41into a Klan rally.
35:42Around half of the state is water and wetlands.
35:46Were you shot at when you were going through those trees?
35:48You wrestled a croc.
35:49Yeah, yeah, yeah.
35:50Eugene, you've ever been in a swamp before?
35:53No.
35:53Why do you doubt all my stories?
35:55Because you're absolute BS artists.
35:57All right, on to the next stop.
35:58Where are we going?
36:00We're going to RV park.
36:01We are at a caravan park.
36:03Keep on going back.
36:04How's the sleeping arrangement?
36:05Good.
36:06Is he in there spooning Will in the double bed?
36:07Was that on his bucket list?
36:09I don't know.
36:09I've never thought of saying it.
36:11Never thought of saying it.
36:12Not a core memory, is it?
36:14Will tells me that the RV lifestyle isn't just about seeing the world through your windshield.
36:20RV lifestyle's the best.
36:22Everyone's so friendly.
36:23Everyone wants to have like a little yarn.
36:25Eugene.
36:26Steve Manuel, how you doing?
36:27Hello, Steve.
36:28We had that the other night.
36:30We had two just pop into our campsite and came just to say g'day.
36:33Yeah.
36:34I think they were pretty pissed.
36:36Well, these guys are pretty pissed too.
36:38Let's go say g'day.
36:39Here's to you.
36:40Cheers.
36:40Here's to you.
36:41Cheers.
36:41We got all of the boring losers at the caravan park together.
36:45This is fun.
36:46I could get involved in this.
36:47I've been married to you for nearly 30 years.
36:50That's not something that you're not saying.
36:51Crawfish started as survival food for the early Cajuns.
36:55Oh, and they just spread it all across the table.
36:58Yeah.
36:58Mmm.
36:59Who shot you, Matt?
37:00Because I haven't heard.
37:01Okay.
37:01Freebers.
37:02Rod, stripper and myself.
37:03Oh, yeah.
37:04Now, I don't tell lies.
37:05I couldn't think of a nicer bunch of people to suck a crawfish's head with.
37:10Why is our brother the only black man in the group?
37:14Oh, there's another black person.
37:16Oh, there.
37:16The accordion.
37:17Of course he's working.
37:18Mmm.
37:20Yeah, get him on the washboard.
37:22That was a bulletproof vest.
37:23In case he got shot at.
37:24Just like Dad.
37:25And the next day, Eugene finishes his road trip in New Orleans.
37:30There we go.
37:31There's no other town quite like New Orleans.
37:33It was near Bourbon Street in New Orleans.
37:35Matt?
37:35Call them.
37:35I could call them now.
37:37Call them.
37:37And they would tell me.
37:38Call them.
37:38Call them.
37:38I'm going to give you my work.
37:39Call them.
37:39Call them now.
37:42Roddy, how are you?
37:43I want to ask you this question.
37:44My whole family's here.
37:45Were we shot at yes or no?
37:47I'm listening, Roddy.
37:49As far as we were concerned, we were.
37:52I love you so much.
37:54Has anyone heard from Maddy?
38:10I'm the man of the house and daddy's in Bali.
38:13All right, relax.
38:14All right, relax.
38:14I'll just ask the question.
38:15At 42 million.
38:17The art world.
38:18The art world?
38:19Boring.
38:21International art dealer Philip Mould and I have teamed up to hunt for lost works by great
38:26artists.
38:26Oh, she's the one-off.
38:28Oh, she's the one-off.
38:28It's like a challenge.
38:30Who am I?
38:30She's the host of Antiques Roadshow.
38:33Oh, we're going to be talking big dollar values.
38:35Yeah.
38:35Correct.
38:38Fake or fortune?
38:39Oh, this is going to be interesting.
38:41Let me tell you if the thing that you think is valuable is actually valuable or is just
38:45a hunk of shit.
38:46Yeah, pretty much.
38:48And art dealer Philip is off to look at this potential hunk of, I mean, masterpiece.
38:53Oh, there's going to be some posh English people out there.
38:56Hello, it's Philip Mould here.
38:58Philip Mould.
38:59Ah, Detective Mould.
39:00So I have come to get a first glimpse.
39:03And everybody whispers when they're looking at art.
39:07Hi.
39:07Hi.
39:08Hi.
39:08So this is the picture you're so excited about?
39:11Yeah, yeah, this is it.
39:12What do you think?
39:13I think it looks like shit.
39:15Can I be frank?
39:16I reckon if we go to any kindergarten, they're probably producing similar work.
39:20It looks like I'm in the shower and I just put my butt cheeks up against the glass.
39:23But would it make a difference if I tell you that it's signed Gorky on the back?
39:27No.
39:28Gorky?
39:28Never heard of him.
39:29As in one of the biggest names in 20th century American art.
39:33Thank you very much for clarifying that.
39:34So it looks like shit, but suddenly it's amazing.
39:37You got it.
39:39But this amazing work is covered in white paint and owner Liza wants to remove it.
39:44Why are you asking us to look at it now?
39:46I could do with a bit of cash to be fair.
39:48At the moment it's insured for $200,000.
39:50$200,000 for that crap.
39:52It's a guess.
39:53There's some parts of art I just don't understand.
39:55I don't think you understand all parts of art.
39:57All right, well let's take a closer look.
39:59The picture is so big it requires a specialist x-ray.
40:02We're doing an x-ray.
40:03What do we put it in?
40:04A big CT scanner?
40:05I don't know, but do you reckon it's bulk built?
40:06Because x-rays are very expensive.
40:09And once the pieces are put together...
40:11Oh, something's underneath.
40:12It's clear we are looking at another picture buried in the canvas.
40:16That looks like a Gorky from what I've seen.
40:20Time to break the news to Liza.
40:22We've been doing some technical analysis on your picture.
40:24This is the result.
40:26Oh my goodness.
40:27Yeah, what do you think of that?
40:28It looks worse.
40:29She's like, what am I looking at?
40:31This is a known Gorky, but it's only known because of the existence of this photograph.
40:37This actual painting is considered missing.
40:40Oh, there's a missing one.
40:41Is this...
40:42That?
40:42Yes.
40:43...this lost Gorky?
40:45Could be.
40:46Yeah.
40:46If it is that, the value's going to go through the roof.
40:50Yes.
40:50Well, it could be worth millions.
40:52Two, three, four million.
40:54Who knows?
40:55Well, suddenly I'm interested.
40:56Great work, Mould.
40:58But how can they fix it?
40:59That's what I want to...
41:00The solution comes in the form of a gel.
41:03Gels allow better control.
41:06Oh, jeez, it's going to take years.
41:07It'll be another 50 years before you find out what it is.
41:09It's the consistency of toothpaste.
41:11How come they can strip paint off an actual expensive artwork, but I can't get fake tan stains off my tootsie?
41:17But then we meet Gorky's granddaughter, who doesn't think they should lose the paint.
41:21It may look like a blank canvas to some people, but I don't think it looked like a blank canvas to Gorky.
41:28She thinks that in itself was already his art.
41:31I'd tell my daughter that the art she does is art, but even I don't believe that.
41:35I would say it's neither a fake nor a fortune.
41:38That's called fake or a fortune.
41:39There's nothing in the middle.
41:40You've got to give me an answer.
41:42Several weeks later, and we've received an opinion from the Gorky Foundation.
41:46Oh, let's go.
41:47Is the old lady going to open an envelope?
41:49We've got the verdict.
41:50It's in an envelope.
41:51This is like the lobe is.
41:52This is like a great gender reveal.
41:54Just read the letter.
41:56It is the opinion of the foundation...
41:58Here we go.
41:59...that the underlying composition is the work of Arshile Gorky.
42:04Is the work!
42:05The lost painting in the X-ray has been authenticated, but it's irreversibly damaged.
42:10Wait, what?
42:11Has been posthumously damaged to the extent that it cannot be considered the work of Arshile
42:17Gorky.
42:17It's fake.
42:18No, it's a real Gorky, but they're not going to give her Gorky credit.
42:21They gawked at that.
42:21Oh, no.
42:22It's posthumously damaged because they used toothpaste on her.
42:25It would have been a fortune, but everyone's been meddling with it, you see.
42:29Depressing end to the day.
42:31Now she just has a big shit piece of canvas that's worth nothing.
42:37I think that absolutely sucked.
42:39Yeah, I know.
42:40It led me on.
42:41I don't know if I aged 40 years watching it, but I would watch the shit out of the rest
42:46of that season.
42:46You wouldn't believe what happened the other day.
43:01I was on a Teams meeting, talking through the agenda, blah, blah, blah, blah.
43:05Next thing you see, this fluffy thing walking behind me along the timber bench.
43:09Bungie.
43:09And then all of a sudden he just squats right there, looks at the camera on my laptop and
43:14takes a big gunner.
43:17This week on Binge, we watched the spin-off of one of TV's most successful comedy series.
43:23The Paper.
43:25In 2005, a documentary crew started filming at a paper company in...
43:29...Scranton, Pennsylvania.
43:29Hold on.
43:31The Office.
43:3120 years later and they've returned.
43:34Oh, we're doing it again.
43:35Kind of.
43:36So is this a documentary or a show?
43:38It's a mockumentary.
43:40Okay.
43:40And it takes place in the offices of the once great newspaper giant, the Toledo Truth Teller.
43:45This is awesome.
43:46This is awesome.
43:47Hello, hello to my toilet kings.
43:49What?
43:50The toilet kings.
43:52And of course, my toilet queen on her toilet throne.
43:56Wait, so is this a toilet paper company?
43:58And a paper company.
43:59Correct.
44:00That once great paper now makes most of its money selling toilet paper.
44:04Still in the paper business.
44:06Music to my ears.
44:07But the series centres on what's left of the newspaper.
44:11So they're running a shithole paper in a shithole town.
44:15My name is Esmeralda Grand.
44:18I'm managing editor.
44:20Hello, Esmeralda.
44:21Here is one of my articles I'm particularly proud of.
44:24I'm scrolling.
44:26Oops.
44:27I hit an ad.
44:28She's like the queen of pelicobite.
44:31So she's the one who thinks she's top shit, but she's doing jack shit.
44:35Esmeralda has some media experience as a contestant on a dating reality show called Married at First Sight.
44:43She's been on maths.
44:45Okay, so maths didn't work out for her.
44:47And today, they're getting a new recruit.
44:49My name is Ned Sampson.
44:51I know him.
44:52This is Dom Neill Gleeson.
44:54What's his job?
44:55So he's the enthusiastic intern.
44:59Got him.
45:00She's locked him in the photocopier room.
45:03That's what you do to the intern, right?
45:05I start work at the paper.
45:07Which paper?
45:08News or toilet?
45:08News or toilet.
45:10We had a security breach a month ago.
45:16Can't be too sure.
45:18Say your ID.
45:19Don't get involved.
45:21You can trust me.
45:22I promise.
45:23Let me out.
45:23This poor bloke.
45:24You guys can let him out.
45:26And to say thank you, Ned takes his saviour to lunch.
45:31Have you read this paper?
45:32Uh-huh.
45:32Okay.
45:33It sucks.
45:36Okay, so he knows he's working for a crap company.
45:38Pun intended.
45:39We are going to make it better.
45:40Sure.
45:41Why don't we talk after you meet your new boss, though?
45:43Esmeralda.
45:44Isn't she the interim managing editor?
45:48Yep.
45:49Right.
45:50They hired me to be the editor-in-chief.
45:51Oh, wow.
45:52He's the main man.
45:53Above Esmeralda?
45:54Yeah.
45:55He's going to be the boss boss.
45:56We thought he was going to be some idiot.
45:58Esmeralda is going to lose it.
46:00I hope it's not too disruptive to have me come in and sort of shake everything up.
46:03Oh, no, no.
46:04Don't be so self-defecating.
46:06Self-defecating.
46:09I can't wait to hear your ideas.
46:11Here we go.
46:12I would like to cut all the garbage, clickbait nonsense on the website.
46:15Oh, that means her job gone.
46:17Yeah, look at her.
46:17She's not happy.
46:18And Esmeralda isn't going down without a fight.
46:22Oh, my God.
46:22What did she send around?
46:23Look, I mean, I think we should schedule a meeting with Marv and just look at the budget.
46:29That's Holly.
46:30We have a fundamental difference of opinion about what the paper is capable of.
46:33Oh, my God.
46:35What did she say in that email?
46:36Did you send an email to everyone here saying that I was not MeToo'd?
46:41So she sent out a post saying he was never MeToo'd.
46:45Yes.
46:46Esmeralda is stirring the pot.
46:47I didn't want you to start off on the wrong foot.
46:51Sit down.
46:52Everyone's going to think he's MeToo'd.
46:54So Ned decides to do something about it.
46:58Oh, stop.
46:59Ned, mate.
47:02My name is Ned Sampson.
47:05I am your new editor-in-chief.
47:07I'm not a sexual harasser.
47:09Me didn't.
47:10Oh, no.
47:10Me didn't.
47:11Oh, my gosh.
47:12Me wouldn't.
47:14And won't.
47:18I think.
47:19Cut it.
47:20The end.
47:21Yeah.
47:23Oh, it's so awkward.
47:24And this is why people want to work from home.
47:26Weird, but watchable.
47:32I have to say, this is a great spin-off.
47:35Do you know how you can get the newspaper online now?
47:37I still prefer to get the actual copy and sit and flick it and read it.
47:41I'm just old-fashioned.
47:42And it's also good to clean your windows.
47:44Yeah.
47:44I'm just old-fashioned.
47:46I'm just old-fashioned.
47:47I'm just old-fashioned.
47:47I'm just old-fashioned.
47:48I'm just old-fashioned.
47:48I'm just old-fashioned.
47:49I'm just old-fashioned.
47:49I'm just old-fashioned.
47:50I'm just old-fashioned.
47:50I'm just old-fashioned.
47:51I'm just old-fashioned.
47:52I'm just old-fashioned.
47:53I'm just old-fashioned.
47:54I'm just old-fashioned.
47:55I'm just old-fashioned.
47:56I'm just old-fashioned.
47:57I'm just old-fashioned.
47:58I'm just old-fashioned.
47:59I'm just old-fashioned.
48:00I'm just old-fashioned.
48:01I'm just old-fashioned.
48:02I'm just old-fashioned.
48:03I'm just old-fashioned.
48:04I'm just old-fashioned.
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