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Have You Been Paying Attention Season 13 Episode 20
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00:00Tonight, join Anne Edmonds, Ray O'Leary, O'Rouge Ashfar, Ed Catherly and Sam Payne, as we look back on the weekend ask, have you been paying attention?
00:17And now, special guest host, Hayley Sproul.
00:22Good evening Australia, great to have your company as we look back on another busy week of breaking news.
00:29I'm Hayley Sproul, looking after the place for Tom Gleisner.
00:32It has been a crazy seven days, but we've got five people with us tonight to help make sense of those headlines.
00:38Host of the You're Not Gonna Like This podcast, who we do like, it's Ed Catherly.
00:42Hi, Lionel, nice to see you.
00:44Winner of Best Newcomer at the Edinburgh Festival, now making her Have You Been Paying Attention debut, and I hope she has been, it's O'Rouge Ashfar.
00:54And heading up a new Vanuatu tourism campaign, so look out for him on those billboards, it's Ray O'Leary.
01:01Host of Talking About Your Gen and a better half of the first couple of comedy, it's Anne Edmonds.
01:09And the winner of last week's show, I demand a recount, it's Mr. Sam Payne.
01:15Welcome everyone.
01:18Great to have you all, O'Rouge.
01:20Welcome to the show, and of course to Australia.
01:22You've just flown in from Mumbai.
01:24Yes, it's really nice to be here.
01:26It was a long flight, so I had a few coffees.
01:29Wow.
01:30They're very strong.
01:32Okay, O'Rouge, give us the O'Rouge Ashfarq story in 15 words or less.
01:37Oh, okay, um, I was born in 1995 on 24th August in Dubai, and now I'm here, oh, uh, for show.
01:50Wow.
01:52Close enough, close enough.
01:54Now, O'Rouge, you won Best Newcomer at the Edinburgh Festival in 2023.
02:02A huge honor, that must have been such a thrill for you.
02:05Yes, it was, it was amazing.
02:07I was really happy to have done that, because that opened up a lot of new opportunities for me.
02:11Really?
02:12Yeah, well look at this, you even made it onto TV in India.
02:14Have a look.
02:27Wow.
02:32Like, what amount was that for?
02:35Like, how much money did they win?
02:36It was, um, a month's worth of rent.
02:39It was, um...
02:41That's, that's what my win was worth.
02:43Okay.
02:44Uh, well, great to have you, O'Rouge.
02:46Hi, Ray, how are ya?
02:47I'm good, thank you, Hayley.
02:48How are you going?
02:49Yeah, really good.
02:50Nice to have another Kiwi on the show.
02:51Is it?
02:56Wow.
02:57Too hot there, Anne.
02:58Too hot.
02:59Tom teased this a while back, but thrilled to now say that you are somehow the face of
03:04Vanuatu's new tourism campaign.
03:06Look at this.
03:10Yes.
03:11I don't...
03:12When people hear Vanuatu, there's one face they picture, and it is...
03:16That's right, O'Leary.
03:17Well, I tell you what, I've got a treat for us, let's have a look.
03:19Immersing myself in nature, and communing with the wildlife, sharing the local cuisine.
03:28Do you do wonderful, isn't it?
03:30Mmm.
03:31Oh!
03:32Wow!
03:33Wow!
03:38Was that paid for by Fiji to stop people going there?
03:41Yeah.
03:42It's great to see you've got your beach suit out as well, Ray.
03:44Yeah, no, thank you.
03:45Yeah, I'm the face of Vanuatu, but unfortunately I still have the body of an American.
03:48Wow!
03:50That is incredible.
03:51But yeah, it's a great place, I highly recommend people check it out.
03:54When you say, oh, it's a great place and you should go there, some examples as to why?
03:59Thank you, Sam, I think it's a great question.
04:01Yeah, so the swimming, the local customs, such as the songs.
04:12Wow.
04:14I mean, I just booked flights now, I just booked flights.
04:17I'd love to hear a little bit of one of those songs.
04:19Oh, yes, thanks!
04:22I can't do it without my make-up on.
04:26What a shame, what a shame.
04:28You're welcome, Anne, lovely to have you on the show.
04:30Thanks very much.
04:31Now, congratulations on hosting, talking about your gen premiere last week.
04:37As you know, all women are now taking over the hosting roles.
04:41I'm looking forward to Ann Pang tonight starting in.
04:44I've watched that.
04:46I've watched that.
04:47You've been doing a lot of press for the show, obviously.
04:49I have, yep, yep.
04:50Including a really beautiful Women's Weekly feature with my wife.
04:53There we are.
04:54Yes, and there.
04:55What?
04:56Yes.
04:58It's a comedy.
04:59I can't get that guy off my gravy chain.
05:02But that, yeah, that is the cover of Women's Weekly.
05:05But this sealed section, let me tell you.
05:08It was, no, it's really artsy.
05:10It's really good.
05:11Yeah, wow.
05:12Yeah, we really went for it.
05:13Did they tell you to touch feet?
05:14And like, is it meant to be a heart?
05:15What are we doing?
05:16That's the first time we've touched in about two years.
05:17Wow.
05:20Oh, absolutely amazing.
05:21All right, you lot, let's get this show on the road, hands-on buzzers.
05:24Another week, another overseas trip for Prime Minister Anthony Albanese.
05:28Where was he this time?
05:31Uh, Arouge.
05:32An Indian wedding?
05:35He went all out.
05:36No, not the answer.
05:37Ed?
05:38Vanuatu.
05:39He saw an ad with this guy.
05:41And he just thought...
05:42The songs.
05:43The songs.
05:45Songs such as...
05:47Vanuatu.
05:48Wow.
05:51I think we just lost you a job.
05:52Sam?
05:53I think it's Papua New Guinea.
05:54On the board.
05:5510 points to you.
05:56Well done.
05:57The Prime Minister announced an ambitious new proposal.
06:0062 to 70%.
06:02This is a responsible target.
06:04What is he aiming to do?
06:07Anne.
06:08That's his blood alcohol.
06:10Not what he's referring to.
06:12Arouge.
06:14Is that he's planning to reduce his screen time?
06:18He's trying to cut something.
06:20That's like carbon emissions or something.
06:21Cut Australia's emissions by 2035.
06:23There you go.
06:24Yeah, yeah.
06:25We heard this a lot during the week.
06:26The Puk Puk Treaty.
06:27The Puk Puk Treaty.
06:28The Puk Puk Treaty.
06:29The Puk Puk Treaty.
06:30The Puk Puk Treaty.
06:31What is the Puk Puk Treaty?
06:33Ray?
06:34That's what my dad calls his marriage to his third Thai wife.
06:37Whether he does or not Ray, it's not worth the points.
06:38I'm sorry.
06:39I'm going to accept that.
06:40Fair enough too.
06:41The Puk Puk Treaty.
06:42Anne?
06:43It's a new treaty with Papua New Guinea.
06:44It is a defence treaty between Australia and Papua New Guinea.
06:45Points are yours Ray?
06:46Oh, I'm more of a Vanuatu guy myself.
06:47He's trying to claw back from that problematic song you son.
07:02Next question.
07:03Donald Trump headed to the UK on Wednesday.
07:06Well, before the US President even arrived in the UK,
07:09there was controversy mid-flight.
07:10Ooh, what was the controversy?
07:13The Rouge.
07:14In-flight entertainment was Jimmy Kimmel.
07:20No.
07:23Not that controversial, no.
07:25And if he sees that joke, you'll never be allowed in.
07:27That's great.
07:29No, not the answer I need though.
07:30What was the controversy on air, Ray?
07:33He was getting increasingly paranoid
07:35because no-one believed him that there was a gremlin on the wing.
07:39No, not on the card, I'm afraid.
07:41What the hell are you talking about?
07:43No, it was something with another airplane.
07:45Did you see this yet?
07:46Yeah, why?
07:47There was a plane that went too close to Air Force One.
07:48They had to tell it to back off.
07:49Indeed.
07:50I will pass you those points.
07:52President Trump reportedly greeted Princess Kate
07:54with what three words?
07:57Sam.
07:58Take it off.
07:59Do not believe he went that far.
08:04Em.
08:05That's nice.
08:06Heard from Andrew.
08:09No, not what he said, Ray?
08:10Yeah, baby, yeah.
08:14No, not quite.
08:15A Rouge.
08:16How you doing?
08:17No.
08:19No, it was inappropriate though.
08:20Sorry, he said you're so beautiful.
08:22You're so beautiful.
08:23You're so beautiful.
08:24He said that.
08:25He said that to her.
08:26Maybe I should start doing that.
08:28Give it a go.
08:29Give it a go.
08:30What did he say?
08:31You're so beautiful.
08:32You're so beautiful.
08:33Ann Edmonds.
08:34Ann Edmonds.
08:35Ann Edmonds.
08:36I'd like you to meet Sam Pang.
08:37Sam Pang.
08:38Ann Edmonds.
08:39Take it off.
08:40No.
08:41That's in the program.
08:42Sorry, Ann.
08:43You don't have to do that.
08:44You don't have to do that.
08:45So you don't have to do that, Ann.
08:46I thought it was the women's weekly screen.
08:48No.
08:49No.
08:50No.
08:51No.
08:52No.
08:53No.
08:54No.
08:55No.
08:56No.
08:57No.
08:58No.
08:59No.
09:00No.
09:01No.
09:02No.
09:03No.
09:04No.
09:05No.
09:06The original Taco Bell.
09:08It's the first one.
09:13It's not.
09:14It's not.
09:15There is nothing Mexican about Taclo Bell.
09:17Ray.
09:18It's hunchback mating season.
09:20No.
09:21There is not.
09:23You'd know.
09:25Arthur.
09:26Arthur,n smaller on this question.
09:28Hayley can you get some control of this please?
09:31I'm not standing for this bullying please.
09:32Be nice to Ray.
09:34It is my busiest time of the year.
09:35Um, no, they're kicking off celebrations for Eruj, you buzzed in.
09:40Um, it was their independence there?
09:42It was, indeed.
09:43Ten points to you.
09:44This is bizarre.
09:45To prove that she is a woman, Emmanuel and Brigitte Macron are producing what evidence
09:50to a US court?
09:52Incredible.
09:53This is incredible.
09:54And?
09:54Less pay?
09:57She's not proving that.
09:59Uh, Ray?
10:00It's nothing.
10:01She's proving she's a woman by giving them the silent treatment.
10:05Don't worry about it, I'm fine.
10:07Oh, it's nuts.
10:08It's like photos of her pregnant and the like.
10:11Correct.
10:11We're going to take a break.
10:12Back with more Have You Been Taking Attention?
10:28The federal government has announced its train wreck energy policy.
10:31It's ambitious and it's achievable.
10:33Written in collaboration with this weird collection of cookers and crackpots.
10:37It's an absolute game changer.
10:39Let's take you overseas now.
10:40Donald Trump has begun his state visit.
10:43Meeting with King Charles and Queen Camilla.
10:45What will the President's trip entail?
10:47Big bags of cocaine.
10:49That's not good.
10:50Well, everyone loves a good party.
10:51We're back.
10:57You're watching Have You Been Paying Attention?
10:58And just before we return to questions, Arouj, while you're here, you're doing a few live
11:03shows.
11:04Yes, I'm doing my live show.
11:06It's called How to Be a Baddie.
11:08Oh, wow.
11:09I'm a bad girl now.
11:09Yeah.
11:10Yeah.
11:11Wow.
11:11How do you find Aussie audiences?
11:13Are they good?
11:14Oh, I think you all are very empathetic.
11:18I've never found that.
11:19Because I think you haven't played for Indian audiences.
11:25Right.
11:27Do you know, Arouj, I've actually performed in India once, years ago, and there are about
11:30nine men took phone calls during the performance.
11:33Is that like a usual, or was it a bad show?
11:35No, I think audiences can be distracted.
11:39No, no, no.
11:39Just tell her it was a bad show.
11:42Hayley, Hayley, I'm sure it was a good show.
11:45Men are the problem.
11:47That's what I want to hear.
11:52Sorry, Hamo.
11:52Sorry.
11:53What was that?
11:54He's got a lot of deals to make.
11:56When Banuatu calls, he takes the call, you know?
11:58Best of luck with all of your shows.
12:00Hands on buzzers.
12:00Let's get through some more questions.
12:02President Trump had some strong words on Wednesday.
12:05In my opinion, you are hurting Australia very much right now.
12:08Who was he talking to?
12:11Anne?
12:12NZ panel show guests.
12:19No, Ray, you have to stay.
12:22Not who he was hurting to.
12:23Ray's hurting Australia and Banuatu.
12:26Australia, New Zealand and Banuatu.
12:28Hayley, he was talking to a reporter from the ABC.
12:32Yes, John Lyons.
12:33Points are yours.
12:33Now, in ice cream news.
12:36Ben and Jerry's ice cream could now be just called Ben's.
12:39What is the story this week?
12:42Arooj.
12:42Dom and Jerry.
12:45Not quite.
12:46Good.
12:47Finally got it.
12:48What's the news between Ben and Jerry and?
12:50I think Jerry stood down.
12:52Yes.
12:53What a scoop.
12:54Oh, here we go.
12:55Here we go.
12:57I'm shopping back.
12:58Sorry, Anne, I think someone in the audience just took a phone call.
13:01That was...
13:01Yes, indeed.
13:03Co-founder Jerry Greenfield quit after a public feud.
13:06Wow.
13:06To a quiet day at a petrol station in Nebraska.
13:14Looks fine.
13:15What happens next?
13:16Looks fine to me.
13:17Hi.
13:18Ray.
13:18Nothing immediately, but in about 100 years it gets a slightly bit warmer.
13:26I don't think we can watch the footage of that, Anne.
13:29Um, I'm assuming some sort of car crash involving cars because there's a car.
13:33Good one.
13:35Something to do with cars because there's cars.
13:36Let's take a look.
13:42Yeah, okay.
13:43And everyone's fine.
13:44Okay, everyone's fine.
13:45I don't care if they are.
13:46We can laugh at it.
13:48All right, it is time to get a little glamorous.
13:59And tonight's showbiz segment is brought to you by the new Mitsubishi Outlander.
14:03It's a bit rock and roll.
14:08Dancing with the Stars US got off to an impressive start.
14:12That wasn't good.
14:13It was great!
14:15Wild, wonderful, in the best possible way.
14:20Probably the best first dance I have ever seen on this show.
14:23That was incredible.
14:25Who did they just watch?
14:27Arooge.
14:27Do you make him mad?
14:30No, no, no.
14:30I think a few more years before he's on the show.
14:33Anne.
14:33I feel like it might be Robert Irwin.
14:35I know he's doing it.
14:37Let's take a look.
14:38Yes!
14:39Yes!
14:43Oh, we love him.
14:45Well done, Anne.
14:46Arooge, you might know this, but, you know, Ed was on the Australian version of Dancing
14:52with the Stars, Arooge.
14:53That's right.
14:54I did that.
14:55Robert Irwin did a jive for his first dance, and I did a jive for my first dance.
14:59And the craziest thing was Ed was on as a star.
15:05The bullying continues on the panel tonight.
15:08Star Wars fans got their first look at what this week?
15:12Ray.
15:12Where babies come from.
15:16Still not yet, no.
15:18First look at what this week, Ed?
15:19No, no, I sound like a nerd.
15:20It was Ryan Gosling in the new Starfighter series.
15:24Oh, you didn't sound like a nerd at all, Ed.
15:26Very sexy and cool, Ed.
15:30Rapper Cardi B got personal.
15:32I'm excited.
15:33I'm happy.
15:34I feel like I'm in a good space.
15:35I feel very strong.
15:37I feel very powerful that I'm doing all this work.
15:39But I'm doing all this work while I'm...
15:41While she's what?
15:43Arooge.
15:45Constipated.
15:46Show must go on, right?
15:49You're doing great, by the way.
15:50No one can tell.
15:53Sorry, was that just between us?
15:55Sorry, sorry, sorry.
15:57No, while she's what?
15:58While she's what, Ray?
16:00Studying to become Cardi B+.
16:02She's not studying.
16:06Anne?
16:06I'll take a swing at pregnant.
16:08Pregnant.
16:09Fourth pregnancy.
16:10We saw this on Channel 9.
16:13Incredibly handsome.
16:14I feel very hot, actually.
16:16Hopefully it's not the menopause.
16:18I'm like a Sharpay puppy when I'm naked.
16:20What is that a promo for?
16:22Like a Sharpay puppy when I'm naked, Ray?
16:25Married at last sight.
16:28I mean, you're not too far off.
16:31What's that for, Anne?
16:32Is it the Golden Bachelor?
16:34And is that where Tom is?
16:35Oh, yeah.
16:36Oh, wow.
16:38Wow.
16:40What?
16:42I will never tell.
16:43I'll give you the points for the Golden Bachelor, though.
16:45Sam?
16:46Is it 20 women in their 60s?
16:48Yeah.
16:48Yeah.
16:48You know what's a better show?
16:49What?
16:5060 women in their 20s.
16:51Here we go.
16:53Here we go, Sam.
16:54There's one, Fez.
16:55One you can do.
16:56All right, let's move it on.
16:57This is Seismic.
16:58For the first time in 9,000 episodes,
17:01the Bold and the Beautiful soap opera will feature what?
17:05Arooge.
17:06Legitimate children.
17:07No, not the judge.
17:09How boring.
17:10Anne?
17:11Acting.
17:11No.
17:12Shots fired.
17:14No.
17:14Ed.
17:15Same-sex couple.
17:17Gay couple.
17:17Ed, you get those points.
17:19There was an unusual problem on dogs behaving very badly.
17:22Do you want to see it with a singlet on?
17:25I wouldn't mind.
17:25Yeah, if that's all right with you.
17:27Yeah, yeah.
17:27It'd be good to see his behaviour.
17:29Yeah, I'll go get changed.
17:30All right-o.
17:30How does he behave when Amy puts on a singlet?
17:34Anne?
17:34Gets a bit judgy.
17:35There we go.
17:37Bit judgy.
17:39Not judgy.
17:40This is rang, I've said.
17:41Yeah, come on, Ed.
17:42Give me the answer.
17:44In showbiz, it's called the Ray O'Leary.
17:45He humps her armpit.
17:48I'm more of a back-of-the-knee cover.
17:52He humps her armpit.
17:56He does indeed take a look.
17:57Don't.
17:58I saw this.
17:58Take a look.
17:59Oh, my God.
18:00All right, yeah.
18:01And it up the neck.
18:02Blimey.
18:02Get off there.
18:03Blimey, indeed.
18:04Yes, Bronx, the British bulldog humps her armpit.
18:07We've got to take a break.
18:08Back with our special guest.
18:09We'll take a right back to this.
18:11We're back.
18:20You're watching Have You Been Paying Attention?
18:22And it's time to meet our very special guest, Quizmaster.
18:25He can make you laugh, cry, and question everything,
18:28and all before interval.
18:29Please welcome Tim Minchin.
18:34Welcome.
18:35Tim.
18:36Hello.
18:36Hello.
18:37Hello.
18:37Hello.
18:37Hello.
18:37Hello.
18:37Hello.
18:38Hello.
18:38Hello.
18:38Hello.
18:38Hello.
18:39Hello.
18:39Hello.
18:39Uh, absolute pleasure to have you here.
18:41I am a huge fan, and I'm feeling super cool.
18:43I'm a fan of you, but I didn't know about you until today, and now I think you're amazing.
18:48Oh, wow.
18:48Do you know, I was saying to the crew backstage, there's three big moments in my Instagram life.
18:53One, Jason Momoa followed me.
18:55Two, The Wiggles followed me.
18:57Right.
18:57And three, Tim Minchin.
18:58People with pecs.
18:59Yeah, yeah.
19:01Just all the people with amazing bodies.
19:03Now, you've been on the show before.
19:04Last time, hot on the back of the London premiere of the movie version of your musical.
19:09Uh-huh, yeah.
19:10Is that quite a surreal moment, watching that up on the big screen?
19:13Yeah, the last 20 years of my life have been quite surreal.
19:17I mean, you have this sort of, your wildest dreams when you grow up as a kind of cabaret pianist
19:22from Perth are sort of here, and some of the things that have happened, so many of the
19:26things that have happened are so far beyond that.
19:28It's very, very gratifying to work on something hard and have it go well.
19:33I know that sounds absurd, but it doesn't always work like that, you know.
19:36It mostly doesn't work like that, to be fair.
19:40Tim, you would have seen Ray's Vanuatu ads earlier.
19:44Is that the sense you got from that?
19:45Yeah, so it's a perfect example of someone who just, like, really puts the nose to the
19:49grindstone and helps an entire nation.
19:52Oh, beautifully.
19:54Now, Tim, you've just been back in the UK, touring your brand new show.
19:57Yeah.
19:59It's a sort of retrospective, but yeah, it's a new show.
20:01The songs the world will never hear, right, kind of reflecting on 20 years.
20:04Yeah, I basically use this 20-year anniversary of my breakout year as an excuse to go,
20:09I'm going to play you stuff from all over the place.
20:10So, like, we do an absolutely bang version of a song from Matilda, and I do stuff from my
20:15record, but I do old comedy stuff.
20:17Yeah.
20:17And, yeah, a couple of songs no one would have heard before.
20:19I've got a lot of favourite Tim Minchins, but the F-sharp singing in F-sharp is just
20:23so good.
20:23Do you, can you do it?
20:25I'll keep playing in F major, but I'll keep singing in F-sharp.
20:32Pretty good, David.
20:33Thank you, thank you.
20:35Can I just remind you that we're on air?
20:40Yes.
20:42I was actually saying, if you're looking for any more works to adapt, I've written a few
20:46books of your, well, they're not books, they're manifestos, but if you want to.
20:51Now, you're about to hit the road in Australia with your show.
20:54Do Aussie audiences make you more nervous, because this is where you're from?
20:57I thought that, but it's the opposite.
20:59Like, when I go, but my best shows in the world are in Perth.
21:01They're so generous to me.
21:03The sense of ownership is really positive, and it hasn't ever flipped.
21:07Yes, Sam?
21:08I just want to raise my hand.
21:09Celia did it last week, and it feels a bit, you know, gentler.
21:12Respectful.
21:13Yeah, it is respectful.
21:13I've earned it.
21:14You have earned it.
21:15And you know I'm a big fan.
21:16During the week, I went out and bought your book.
21:18Oh, yeah.
21:19Yeah, so we've got a...
21:20It's huge.
21:20You've never done this before.
21:21No, I've never done this before.
21:22I've brought it in your book.
21:23There's your book.
21:23Oh, there it is.
21:24Did you read it?
21:25I don't even have that much time to read it.
21:27But I wanted to ask you, because there's one part of it, well, the main part is about
21:31nine life lessons that you have.
21:34What did you think was the most important of the nine?
21:36The one that sort of made it viral is about micro-ambition.
21:41Like, rather than setting your sights too far ahead, you should be really passionate about
21:45what's in front of you.
21:46But the one I like is happiness is like an orgasm.
21:48If you think about it too much, it goes away.
21:50Oh.
21:52Wow.
21:52All right, you lot, Tim has kindly agreed to ask you some questions.
21:56Hands on buzzers.
21:57Tim, take it away.
21:59Ed Sheeran has revealed plans for a posthumous album release.
22:04What's he calling it?
22:05What's he calling it after he dies, Anne?
22:07Dead Sheeran.
22:08That's good.
22:10It's a sitter, isn't it?
22:11That's good.
22:12Easy.
22:12That's a sitter.
22:13Not bad.
22:14He's missed that one, Ray.
22:16Night of the Living Ed.
22:18Oh.
22:19That's great.
22:19More, I want more, more more.
22:21No, not the time one.
22:22He's quite young, isn't he?
22:22This is odd.
22:23Is this odd?
22:23Yeah, but he's planning ahead.
22:24And you never know when you're going to die.
22:25Aroosh?
22:26I think it's called Eject.
22:28Eject.
22:28Eject.
22:29It is.
22:2910 points to you.
22:30What about you, Tim?
22:30Posthumous album, what do you reckon?
22:32I'd call it Who's the World Gonna Revolve Around Now?
22:35Here we go.
22:35I like that.
22:37I like that.
22:39Reaching in the back for old material, Anne.
22:41That's what we're here for.
22:42Sam, have you ever thought about what you'll do posthumously?
22:46No, Hayley.
22:47I live in the moment.
22:48Wow.
22:50Oh.
22:51All right, Tim, next question.
22:52Warming up, Sam.
22:53Yeah, yeah, yeah.
22:53All right.
22:54Well, this was unexpected.
22:55Elton John has made jewellery out of his...
22:59Out of his...
23:02What?
23:04Easy, Sam.
23:05Grow up.
23:05Yeah.
23:06What's wrong with you?
23:07Come on.
23:08What's he made jewellery out of?
23:11Anne.
23:11Is it the glasses?
23:13Maybe?
23:13No, not the glasses.
23:15He had a surgery, if that's a bit of a clue.
23:17Head.
23:18Hip?
23:18Hip.
23:18Bone?
23:19Oh, bone.
23:20But you don't get the point.
23:21No.
23:21Sam?
23:22Let's make it fun.
23:23What's it connected to?
23:24There we go.
23:25What was that?
23:26No, I don't think we can pay it.
23:28Ray.
23:28Pelvic floor?
23:29No.
23:31Oh.
23:31Not the pelvic floor.
23:33Anne.
23:33Toes?
23:34No.
23:35Arouge?
23:36Is it his knees?
23:36It is.
23:37Yeah.
23:38His knees.
23:40Yeah.
23:41His patella, in fact.
23:42His kneecap.
23:43Okay.
23:43Next question.
23:44Christina Aguilera surprised fans by confirming she's now the voice of what?
23:51What is it, Anne?
23:52Sports pet.
23:53Oh.
23:54Goddamn.
23:55That's fine.
23:56I don't think that's her new job, no.
23:58What's she the voice of?
24:00Arouge?
24:00She's the lady who tells you the person you're calling is busy.
24:04No.
24:05That would be delightful, though.
24:07No, not the answer.
24:08It's quite a surprising one, Ray.
24:10She's the voice of a generation two generations ago.
24:14I mean, what is it, Sam?
24:20Can I have a hint?
24:21Yeah.
24:22It's an app.
24:23It's an app.
24:24We don't know whether you use it.
24:26Yeah, we're not sure if you're on it or not, Ray.
24:27Her kneebone.
24:29No.
24:30It's an edge.
24:31Grindr?
24:32Grindr.
24:32It is.
24:33It's a voice of Grindr.
24:34She thinks things are going well.
24:35Yeah.
24:35Next she'll be doing ads for Yui.
24:37Yeah.
24:41All right, Tim.
24:42Margot Robbie received some surprising news.
24:45She would love you to play her in a movie.
24:49She did not.
24:49Yeah.
24:50Why has no one ever told me this before?
24:52Can we pull that up?
24:53Who are they talking about?
24:55I heard a movie.
24:55It's mushroom cook.
24:59That will happen, though.
25:01Do you guys do that, like, Sunday night theater?
25:03Mate, the mushroom cook is going to be played by Ray with his hair straightened.
25:06Actually, the perfect air in Patterson.
25:10It's so Patterson.
25:11He's so Patterson.
25:13Yeah.
25:17And aren't you from Wellington?
25:19I don't know.
25:19Oh, I'm from Wellington.
25:22And there's a plate for you in your dressing room.
25:25Sam.
25:26I'm going to play the Asian grocer that she tried to blame it on.
25:28It's our Kylie.
25:35Kylie Minogue.
25:35Our Kylie.
25:36Oh, our Kylie Minogue.
25:37Yeah.
25:38Ray?
25:38I'm just saying, we're lining up Danny DeVito to play me in her biopics.
25:42Slightly more believable in that one.
25:43Hey, Tim.
25:44It feels like we're getting towards the end.
25:46You know, earlier on in the show, President Trump greeted Princess Kate with,
25:50You're so beautiful.
25:52You've met lots of royalty.
25:53How do you greet them?
25:54Oh, yeah.
25:55Well, I've only met the king.
25:58Oh.
25:59No.
26:00Wayne, what I mean by that is I wouldn't say to Charles,
26:05even if I was thinking it, you're so beautiful,
26:08but I'm not Donald Trump.
26:09Aroosh?
26:10Can I tell you what I would say if I met the king?
26:12Yes, please.
26:12Yes, please do.
26:13Thanks for leaving.
26:14Oh.
26:17Lovely.
26:18I mean, that's fair, isn't it?
26:20That's fair.
26:20Probably for the best.
26:21Yeah.
26:22Well, we're going to take a break.
26:23You can catch Tim live on stage around the country from October 31st
26:27or grab his new album, Time Machine, from all good record stores.
26:30Give it up for Tim Minchin.
26:41We're back and it's time to put each of our contestants individually to the test.
26:46The internet is home to all sorts of tips and tricks,
26:49so we thought it might be time for a bit of this.
26:51It's under the influencer.
26:58The rules are simple.
26:59I will show you each a clip from a well-known content creator.
27:02You just have to answer a question.
27:04All right.
27:04And Ray, we're going to start with you.
27:06We are heading to Dublin where professional dating coach David is doing the ladies a solid
27:24hashtag relationship hacks.
27:26Five obvious signs she doesn't like you.
27:29Number one, she reacts passively to your attempt to keep the conversation going.
27:34Number two, she has a serious facial expression for 30 to 60 seconds or longer,
27:38even when you're trying to be funny.
27:40Three, her body's turned slightly away from you.
27:43Four, she avoids eye contact.
27:45Five, she says...
27:46Five, she says what, Ray?
27:49I think the fifth sign is that you already have four signs that she doesn't like you.
27:55Yeah, if you haven't sort of picked up on it by then, right?
27:57Yeah, I'm just trying to think about all the dating documentaries I've watched that could...
28:01Right.
28:01You know, I'm just thinking you'd inflate your neck sack to indicate your virility.
28:08And then see if she responds in kind.
28:10Right.
28:10I'm going to give you a clue, Ray.
28:11It's not inflate your neck sack.
28:15I need you to lock in an answer, Ray.
28:16What was his fifth tip on how to tell that a woman doesn't like you?
28:20Five, she says...
28:21If you ask her on a date, she says no.
28:25Okay, let's see.
28:26It was nice to meet you.
28:27She says it was nice to meet you.
28:31That's kind of closing the thing.
28:33Ray, I cannot pay it.
28:34Sorry.
28:35All right, Sam, take a look at your helpful hint from California cycling enthusiast, Rafi.
28:40Hashtag Lycra Lover.
28:42Just bought your first bike.
28:44Do not leave the bike shop without buying these three things.
28:47First and foremost, obviously, a helmet.
28:50Second of all, highly recommend buying yourself a nice quality floor pump.
28:55And lastly, highly recommend don't leave a bike shop without buying...
29:00Without buying a what, Sam?
29:03Can I ask a question?
29:04Yes, Sam.
29:05I know that's on TikTok.
29:06Yeah.
29:06Right.
29:08I don't play TikTok.
29:09You don't play TikTok.
29:11Is that big?
29:12Like, is that guy well known?
29:13Is that...
29:14Does that go viral this week?
29:16Like, what is that?
29:17I'm sure he's an influencer, yeah.
29:18Thank you for asking.
29:19We're not just bringing anyone willy-nilly.
29:20Yeah, exactly.
29:21He's the number one bike influencer.
29:23Yeah, bikefluencer.
29:24So, what does he buy?
29:27Number three, don't leave the shop without buying.
29:29You have to have...
29:31What's his third item?
29:32The stick thing?
29:33The helmet?
29:34What are you laughing at?
29:35A seat.
29:37Oh, God.
29:37A seat?
29:40Excuse you, Anne.
29:41Your turn's coming up, please.
29:42I'm assuming...
29:43I'm not on TikTok.
29:45I'm assuming the bike already comes with a seat.
29:48Why would you buy another one?
29:49No, because if you ride a bike without a seat, it's not...
29:52Yeah.
29:55Slightly different for us, Anne, and it's for Sam and the likes.
29:58You are a child.
30:01Sam, I didn't answer.
30:02What is the third item all cyclists must get from the bike shop?
30:06Another helmet.
30:07There we go.
30:08Spare, spare helmet.
30:10Do you think it's helmet, bike bump, helmet?
30:15Let's see if you're right.
30:16A nice saddlebag.
30:17A nice saddlebag.
30:19What's...
30:19Sam, what's a saddlebag?
30:22It's the little thing under the seat and you can keep your keys and your phone and your tampons, I guess.
30:26I don't know.
30:28No points paid to you, Sam, unfortunately.
30:30Anne, your turn now.
30:32That was hot.
30:32British entrepreneur Mark Tilbury has some hot tips for your next trip.
30:37Hashtag tight-ass travel.
30:39Five things I do before every flight as a millionaire businessman.
30:42First, I take a picture of my luggage just before checking so I can claim up to $3,800 if it gets lost or stolen.
30:49Second, I bring an empty water bottle and fill it up after security to save on overpriced drinks.
30:54Third, I use my credit card for free entry to airport lounges.
30:57Fourth, I put an Apple AirTag in my luggage so I can track it in real time.
31:02Fifth, I email myself.
31:03Now, Anne, what does millionaire Mark email himself?
31:07I reckon his divorce papers.
31:11He emails himself...
31:14Before he travels anywhere.
31:15Before he travels anywhere, he would email himself probably his tickets.
31:21So we want to lock him?
31:21No.
31:22Uh, um, and a scanned thing of his passport.
31:26Like a, um, you know?
31:28Yeah, good one.
31:29Three.
31:30Don't, you're not, this is not a team sport.
31:33Three tips when he buys a bike.
31:37All right, Anne, so you're locking in, um, some papers and a copy of his passport.
31:41Let's see if you are correct.
31:42Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
31:43Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on.
31:44Could you mention Vanuatu?
31:48Or he's staying alive.
31:50And I will accept your answer.
31:55Let's have a look.
31:55I email myself copies of my passport and travel documents in case I lose it.
31:59I just got five points.
32:01Ten points to you, Anne Edmonds.
32:04All right, Ed, you're up.
32:06God.
32:06Canadian Kung Fu Sensei Kevin Goat has an important question.
32:11Hashtag self-defense training.
32:13You look like Tom Hardy if I ordered you on Wish.
32:15Oh, yeah?
32:16Whoa.
32:17Oh, yeah.
32:17Do you know the three most common signs before someone punches you in the face?
32:21Yeah.
32:21First sign, forward aggression.
32:23You're getting closer to you.
32:24You're not maintaining your reactionary gap.
32:26Oh, yeah.
32:26Second thing to look for is those clenching of the fist.
32:29Third one.
32:30Wow.
32:30Ed, what is the third sign?
32:32He sends an email saying...
32:34No, you've got a big start.
32:36...punched incoming.
32:37No, no, no.
32:38What is the third sign that you're about to get punched in the face?
32:41Well, normally...
32:42Normally?
32:43It's, uh, you know...
32:44How many times are you getting punched in the face, Ed?
32:46Well, you know, it depends if people have seen my Yui ads or not.
32:49No, no, no, no.
32:51I don't think...
32:52Wide eyes.
32:53Like, whoa, look out.
32:55Wide eyes.
32:55Wide eyes?
32:56I don't know.
32:56Let's find out if it's wide eyes.
32:59They're going to be looking off in another direction,
33:00trying to distract you with their eyes,
33:02so that you look away for that split second,
33:04so that they get the job done.
33:05I can't pay wide eyes.
33:08No.
33:09He looks away to distract you.
33:11No points paid.
33:13Aroosh.
33:18She's going to hit me.
33:19She's going to hit me.
33:22Do it.
33:22Do it.
33:24Are her fists clenched, Ed?
33:26Yes.
33:28It doesn't help that Anne's shouting,
33:29do it, do it.
33:30All right, Aroosh.
33:33Here's some life advice from Gen Z TikToker Jasmine.
33:37Hashtag, for the girls.
33:39Start taking notes because this is how to respond to mean girls.
33:43Number one, ask them if they're okay.
33:44Because mean girls are usually projecting their own insecurities onto you.
33:48Number two, tell them they have something on their teeth.
33:50It's going to throw them off and make them self-conscious.
33:52Number three, go act dumb and ask them to explain the joke.
33:55They'll keep digging their own grave and they'll feel awkward after a while.
33:58Number four, just accuse them of having a crush on you.
34:01Are you in love with me or something?
34:03And lastly, just call them out and tell them...
34:05Call them out and tell them what?
34:07To take a trip to Vanuatu.
34:16Wow.
34:17Just scrambling to save that deal, aren't you, Ray?
34:19Aroosh, it is not...
34:21I'll give you a clue.
34:22It's not take a trip to wonderful Vanuatu.
34:24Could it be, um, tell them to go to therapy or something?
34:29Right?
34:29No, that seems constructive.
34:31It does.
34:32It's very helpful.
34:33Yeah, like, why are you doing that?
34:34I feel like that would come out of that mouth.
34:37Tell them that you're not afraid of them and then create a visual diversion.
34:42Wow.
34:45Locking it in?
34:46Locking that in.
34:46Lock that in.
34:47Let's have a look.
34:48Call them out and tell them that they're being a big a-hole.
34:50Mmm, sorry, Aroosh.
34:52I cannot pay you the points.
34:54And all too soon, that brings us to the end of...
34:59Tunda, the Influencer.
35:02All right, back with more Have You Been Paying Attention right after this.
35:11We're back.
35:12You're watching Have You Been Paying Attention?
35:14Hands on buzzers.
35:15It's time to pull on your lycra and get ready for a bit of this.
35:20Here we go.
35:28Big night out for Cathy Freeman and Ian Thorpe.
35:31What were they all dressed up for?
35:33Sam?
35:34They're about to MC an event for Essendon Fields Shopping Centre.
35:41Ah, not why they're looking so good.
35:43A, it was a breakfast and B, they wish.
35:45Ah, no, not on the card.
35:48Ray?
35:49No, they're looking for a third, or as they call it, a triathlon.
35:54No, not with the third.
35:55Ray, for trying something in sport.
35:57I appreciate it.
36:00Normally you just go into a little coma.
36:02I appreciate that, buddy.
36:04No, Anne?
36:04I'm going to take a guess.
36:06The Olympics was something about the Olympics this week.
36:0920 is wrong.
36:1120 years?
36:12Wrong?
36:1320 years since the Olympics.
36:14So long.
36:1420 years since the Olympics started.
36:17Man.
36:18No, it was their induction into Stadium Australia's Hall of Fame.
36:22Yeah, but it was something of the Olympics.
36:24And I'm not saying it had none of the information.
36:26Yeah, because of the Olympics.
36:26You get none of it.
36:27Fair enough.
36:27Yeah, they appeared in the Olympics a long time ago.
36:29Yeah.
36:30Something to do with the Olympics.
36:32They've been in it.
36:32Spanish tennis star Carlos Alcaraz broke the internet with this picture.
36:37What is he doing in prison?
36:39Anne.
36:39Visiting Kyrgios.
36:42Not visiting Kyrgios, no.
36:44What's he doing in prison there?
36:46Arouge.
36:46He found another way to sell.
36:48That's good.
36:49Oh, that's very good.
36:51I like that.
36:51We like that, but I can't pay it.
36:54What was he doing there, Ed?
36:56Is that Alcatraz?
36:57It is.
36:58Why is that?
36:58Who cares?
36:59Alcaraz and Alcatraz.
37:00Oh, I tell you why we care.
37:02Because he gave three tips on what to do after you buy a bike.
37:05No.
37:06And made it all worthwhile.
37:08Moving along.
37:09What a good week for Ange Postacoglu.
37:11Ange Postacoglu can scarcely believe what he's seen here.
37:16What did he just see?
37:18Ray?
37:19A g-g-g-g-ghost?
37:22Uh, no, not what he just saw.
37:26What did he just see?
37:27His team was 2-0 up, and they got defeated 3-2.
37:31Nottingham was knocked out of the Carabao Cup by Swansea.
37:35Points are yours, Sam.
37:36To the world of athletics.
37:38What a night, and what a moment for Mondo!
37:42Mmm, what's Swede Amand Mondo Deplantis celebrating there?
37:47Uh, assembling an IKEA table.
37:51You've got to celebrate.
37:53Not what he's celebrating.
37:54It's like he's pitching a tent.
37:55Yeah.
37:56Now, Ed, what's he celebrating there?
37:58He's at the pole vault world record.
38:00Yeah, he just broke the world pole vault record for the 14th time.
38:04Can you believe it, Ray?
38:05I thought it should have gone to the other guy.
38:06Yeah.
38:07Have a look at that.
38:08It was a 6.3 metre jump.
38:10Yes, look.
38:11The crowd are on their feet.
38:12They're roaring him on.
38:13Get over.
38:13Is it his fourth world record of the year?
38:15Wow.
38:17He touched her, though.
38:18Yeah, he did bump her.
38:19It wasn't clean.
38:20Yeah, you're right.
38:23Missy, actually, I am.
38:25All right, tough week on the track for Aussie Jess Hull.
38:28Hey, Jess, have a quick look at this here.
38:29It was taken from...
38:31I was taken from behind, I think.
38:33Yep.
38:41What is she talking about, Sam?
38:44Pass.
38:47Just as well.
38:48Drum pass.
38:50Ray.
38:51The Olympic Village.
38:52No.
38:55Not quite.
38:56This was at the World Athletics.
38:58The chaps there.
38:59What could she be talking about, Ed?
39:00Is she bumped or something?
39:01There's some argy-bargy?
39:03What do you call it?
39:03Argy-bargy?
39:04Anne?
39:04The biggest pole vault came in.
39:14Ed, I mean, you're the closest.
39:16Can we get...
39:16Elbow or something?
39:17Yeah, go on, Sam.
39:18She got knocked over.
39:19That's it.
39:20She got knocked over, Sam, have a look.
39:21Look at this.
39:22Oh, just tell me to find...
39:23Oh, she's down!
39:24She's down, there was a bit of nudging behind her.
39:26The red one, the one in red.
39:27She got taken down from behind.
39:29Do you reckon she got any ouchies?
39:31I think maybe a couple of ouchies.
39:32The PGA Tour's season-opening event in Hawaii is being moved due to watch.
39:38Why is it being moved, Ray?
39:39So, you said it was meant to be PG, but there are 18-plus holes.
39:43She's...
39:44She's...
39:44Mate, he is...
39:49What did you guys do in the air break?
39:51He is...
39:51Mate, Ray is on heat.
39:54This is...
39:54Sorry, this is you.
39:56What is production?
39:57Sorry, it's hunchback season, I'm so sorry.
40:02Not the answer.
40:05Jeepers.
40:06Too dry or fires or something?
40:08Drought.
40:08I'll take dry.
40:09I'll take dry.
40:10Drought.
40:10The host course is unplayable.
40:12To an unusual moment during a college football game.
40:15You see the smoke here.
40:17Looks like the situation is somewhat getting under control.
40:20What was the source of the smoke?
40:23Why is it smoky, Sam?
40:25Fire.
40:27I'd love just a touch of one.
40:31Arouche.
40:32Snoop Dogg.
40:32It was not.
40:33He wasn't there, I believe.
40:35Ed, what was it?
40:36Food truck or something?
40:36Something like a food truck caught fire?
40:38Let's take a look.
40:38It's actually a food truck behind the stadium that's causing the smoke and the fire.
40:44Oh, man.
40:44There you go.
40:44Points are yours, Ed.
40:45We're going to take a break.
40:46When we return, our winner is announced.
40:55We're back.
40:56Let's close this show out with a little Rapid Recall.
40:59And tonight's Rapid Recall is proudly brought to you by Yui.
41:02You haven't shopped around until you've tried Yui.
41:07Sam.
41:07Her hat's too big.
41:09Is it?
41:10Look how big that is.
41:12It's insane.
41:13Appropriate size for a wonderful product.
41:16Hands on buzzers.
41:18Start that clock.
41:19President Macron visited Notre Dame Cathedral on Friday.
41:22Why was he there?
41:24Ed.
41:24Well, they were unveiling a statue of his wife.
41:28Please, Ed.
41:29No.
41:30He was opening something, Sam.
41:32He was reopening Notre Dame.
41:34Correct.
41:35Ten points.
41:36The royals gathered on Tuesday for what solemn occasion?
41:40Arouge?
41:40Meghan Markle's birthday.
41:44No, no, no.
41:44Far more solemn than that.
41:46Yeah, yeah.
41:47Ed, what was it?
41:48Just quickly, is that Andrew behind the weeks?
41:49It is.
41:50Hello.
41:50Yeah.
41:51Good to see you.
41:52No, what was the solemn occasion?
41:54It was big news.
41:55Anne?
41:55One of them died like one of the back stalls.
41:58Do you know what?
41:59I'm going to give it to you because you're the closest.
42:00The Duchess of Kent's funeral.
42:02Scientists have revealed the correct way to eat Maltesers.
42:05What is it?
42:07Ed.
42:07In the mouth, hopefully.
42:11Ed, I am shockingly giving you ten points.
42:14Sam?
42:14Firstly, scientists.
42:16Well done.
42:17Yeah.
42:18Secondly, it's chopsticks.
42:19No.
42:21It's not.
42:21That's a good test.
42:22That's a good test.
42:23Malteser came out to just reiterate this is how you should eat it.
42:27Pop it in your mouth and crunch down.
42:29As opposed to what?
42:30Yeah.
42:31You get ten points for that.
42:33Okay.
42:33Why is Costco in America recalling this Prosecco?
42:37Ray?
42:38The bottle is empty by the time I get home.
42:42Not why it's being recalled.
42:43No, it like explodes on touch or something.
42:45Yeah, unopened bottles are just shattering without being touched.
42:48Hello.
42:48Why is this $4,500 luxury pram in the news this week?
42:53Sam?
42:54Anne's getting rid of it.
42:57Must be nice.
42:58Anne.
42:58$4,000.
42:59Is that like the most expensive pram ever made or something?
43:02Yeah, but it's...
43:03Who made it?
43:04Who's making it, Sam?
43:06Oh, probably six-year-old kids in China.
43:08Yeah.
43:10Why is it in the news?
43:11Aston Martin.
43:12Yes, the first pram made by Aston Martin.
43:14You get the points.
43:15Chapel Roan is set to headline what big Aussie festival?
43:19Anne.
43:20Gympie Youth Master.
43:21I don't know.
43:22No.
43:23No.
43:23I don't know if she's going to do that while she's here.
43:25No.
43:26What's the big festival, Ray?
43:27Is it the laneway one?
43:29The laneway one?
43:30Yeah.
43:31Yeah, it's laneway.
43:32Oh, God.
43:33Do you go to many festivals, Ray?
43:35I'm waiting for the invite.
43:38Not how festivals work, that's why.
43:40Ten points to you.
43:41The notorious Tinder swindler is back in the news.
43:44What's he done this time?
43:46Ray?
43:47Is that him?
43:48Yeah.
43:49Yes.
43:49Oh, no.
43:49I've given him everything.
43:55When Ray says everything, it's a briefcase with an apple in it.
44:00It's not a lot.
44:02No, what's he done this time?
44:03If Barney's busted again, is he a new scam?
44:04Yeah, yeah.
44:05Arrested for allegedly scamming victims out of $15 million this time, Ed.
44:08Oh, Ray.
44:09Tough week for Queensland drug users.
44:12The government has banned what?
44:14Arooge.
44:15Munchies.
44:16Not Munchies, Anne.
44:18Trains to the Gold Coast.
44:20No, not what the team's raised.
44:22Conversations at 2am.
44:25Still up for grabs.
44:26Sam?
44:27Testing.
44:27Yes, pill testing clinics.
44:28Points are yours.
44:29Rebecca Gibney has been...
44:31Oh, and we're out of time.
44:33Let's check that final leaderboard.
44:34And our winner tonight is...
44:36Ed Cavalli!
44:42Congratulations to our winner and thank you to everyone
44:45for being part of the show tonight.
44:46We'll leave you with this reminder of the need to pay attention
44:48to the passion of sports fans.
44:51Game on!
44:51What do we make of Hawthorne?
44:54We hate Hawthorne, they're fucking scum.
44:56We don't like him.
44:58Sorry about that.
44:59We're having it.
44:59Good night, Australia.
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44:33
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