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Celebs Go Dating (2016) Season 14 Episode 18- Episode 18
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00:00Tonight!
00:01Your dipsis has swollen to three times the size.
00:05Let's cut in questions.
00:07Have you discussed money?
00:09That makes me uncomfortable.
00:10And awkward answers.
00:12Have you enjoyed any of your dates?
00:13No.
00:14As a celeb?
00:15They want me to ask, what are your intentions?
00:18And I'm going, are you my dad?
00:19No.
00:20I would love to go for that drink with you again.
00:23I feel like I'm begging.
00:25Dating!
00:26Can you put your legs behind your head?
00:28Uh, later.
00:29Later?
00:44Welcome to Celebs Go Dating, where our agency finale gala
00:48is bearing down on us like Will Smith at the Oscars.
00:52Hello!
00:54And ready to slap our celebs into shape are our experts of enchantment,
00:58who are already in the bloody office, for once.
01:01Who do we have in today?
01:03Oh, so we've got Kerry and Paolo and Donna and Sam.
01:07So, actually, I better be off.
01:09Busy.
01:10Busy all day.
01:11Because the first batch aren't far off.
01:13Wow, look at that.
01:14Look at that.
01:15Thank you, T.
01:16Thanks, babe.
01:17Bye.
01:18Our time with the celebrities is coming to a close, so they do need to start deciding who,
01:23if anybody, they will be bringing with them to the gala.
01:26Some of them already know, which is why we have Kerry and Paolo coming in to see us today.
01:31Did any of us think we'd be at the point in this agency where Kerry was coming in with a partner?
01:38I actually had a tenor on her and the Beast hooking up.
01:41Kerry has a boyfriend, Kerry has a boyfriend.
01:44I was in the session when Kerry was first introduced to Paolo, and I saw how she handled that,
01:51and I think that she needs to be reminded of where she started.
01:54Yeah.
01:55So, I'd love to be able to jump in.
01:57I want to know that they have the tools for long-term relationships.
02:00Absolutely.
02:01Girl, I'm about to have a panic attack.
02:05Well, you better get moving, because here they are.
02:08Looking like they've just got married or been to the small claims court.
02:11It's Kerry and Paolo.
02:14Ooh.
02:15Hello, celebrity dating agency.
02:17Hi, it's Kerry and Paolo.
02:19Oh, the two of you.
02:22Come in, dude.
02:23Oh, oh, oh.
02:24Am I ready?
02:25Not the same adult.
02:27Am I ready?
02:28Won't you love to be loved?
02:33Oh, look at you both.
02:36Oh, oh.
02:38I'm in a group home.
02:40Hello, hello.
02:43I'm overflowing with excitement.
02:46Seeing Kerry and her new squeeze Paolo makes me bubble up inside.
02:50In fact, I might uncork a dose of my effervescence.
02:54Don't worry, guys.
02:55There's a dry cleaners around the corner.
02:57You have a fan club here, practically.
02:59Oh, really?
03:00Oh, yes.
03:01It's nice, isn't it?
03:02Nice, isn't it?
03:03Oh.
03:04Look at you both.
03:06Oh, gosh.
03:07I'm cock a hoop.
03:09I really am.
03:10You'll cock her anything.
03:12So, are those three bathing Tom's effervescence?
03:15Across town, the only thing S Club John and his hot hairdresser Jordan have been bathing
03:21in is each other's love.
03:22And maybe a hot tub.
03:24Ever since locking lips on their first date, they've been inseparable.
03:29And officially tied each other down at the brunch.
03:32I'm only, like, a one-person guy, and Jordan said the same.
03:36So, officially off the market, yeah, so.
03:38Wow!
03:39Oh, my God!
03:42But shit is about to get real for these two lovebirds, as someone very exciting is about
03:46to join this S Club party.
03:48It's only bloody S Club Joe.
03:50I'm really excited for Joe to meet Jordan today.
03:53Joe is my best mate.
03:54I've known her for 28 years.
03:56So, yeah, I can't wait for her to meet Jordan.
03:58I know that she's, like, a big sister to John.
04:00So, he really, really does genuinely love Joe to bits.
04:04So, yeah, obviously, I do want to make a good impression on her.
04:08Maybe I'll give her a free hairdo.
04:10I don't know.
04:11Fix that fringe of hers.
04:13Maybe don't leave you that.
04:15I am going to say I'm a little bit nervous, to be honest.
04:17Why?
04:18I don't know.
04:19Yeah, so.
04:20Joe's just like me in a better wig.
04:22Seriously.
04:23That's it.
04:24Hopefully we'll have a good time.
04:26You will do.
04:27You will do.
04:28Well, let's find out, shall we?
04:29Here she comes.
04:30Some proper pop royalty.
04:32It's S Club Joe.
04:34With John being my best mate, I definitely need to know what his intentions are,
04:39because he's not going to go around hurting my boy, that's for sure.
04:42First rule of S Club, don't mess with S Club.
04:45Good luck, Jordan.
04:46S Club.
04:47Oh, here she comes.
04:48I'm coming.
04:49Pink lady.
04:50You all right, mate?
04:51Pink lady today.
04:52You look gorgeous.
04:53You look lovely.
04:54Look at us in the summers.
04:55I know.
04:56You all right, mate?
04:57Yeah.
04:58Hello.
04:59This is Jordan.
05:00Nice to meet you.
05:01How are you doing?
05:02You look beautiful.
05:04So do you.
05:05Thanks.
05:06Oh, let's get into it.
05:07I didn't know what you wanted, so I just got your usual.
05:09Ooh, slippery nipple with extra nipple.
05:11Delicious.
05:12Oh, thank you so much.
05:15Cheers, everyone.
05:16Cheers, guys.
05:17Cheers.
05:18This is nice.
05:19Eyes.
05:20Eyes.
05:21Eyes.
05:22How's things?
05:23How's it all been going?
05:24It's been fun.
05:25Yeah, good.
05:26It's very, very exciting.
05:27It's nice to see you happy.
05:28It makes a change, doesn't it?
05:29Well, I don't see you smile much.
05:33He's not a natural-born smile, is John.
05:36What was John like an espel?
05:39Similar to now, bit less forehead.
05:41Well, I think where John was so young, he was sort of like still trying to find himself
05:47a lot, weren't you, really?
05:48And I think especially being gay and having to keep it all completely hidden away.
05:54Yeah, yeah.
05:55And I think when you're that age and in the public eye, it's...
05:59It's hard for anyone, isn't it?
06:01It's hard, yeah, it is.
06:02And I don't think people really appreciate how hard it actually probably was for you.
06:06Because we all knew.
06:07We didn't take no notice.
06:08Yeah.
06:09It's just like, you know what I mean?
06:10It was a normal thing, weren't it?
06:11Yeah.
06:12But...
06:13He's a bit of a gay icon, isn't he?
06:15Oh, yeah.
06:17Absolutely.
06:18It wasn't for me anyway.
06:19And me.
06:20Look at him.
06:21I mean, and you know what?
06:22I've got to say, I never thought, if I'm being completely honest, that you would ever
06:27meet anyone.
06:28Neither did I.
06:29I just didn't.
06:30Nothing like a confidence boost from your best mate.
06:34From one pop princess to another now, as back at the agency, Kerry is heading up to
06:39see the agents with Paolo.
06:41Ka-Paolo, go with it, have been hitting it off big style, with Kerry even introducing
06:46him to daughter Heidi, and Bezzy Danielle isn't that Mel B's sister Brown.
06:51I really like Kerry.
06:52We get on very well.
06:54You're making my friend happy, basically.
06:57Hello.
06:58Hi.
06:59That's the one we met.
07:00We heard, we heard.
07:01Here he is.
07:02Here he is.
07:03Good.
07:04You are both looking so posh.
07:06Are you ganged?
07:07Are we diddling?
07:08Please get comfortable.
07:09All right.
07:10You're all right?
07:11Yeah.
07:12My man, how are you doing?
07:13I'm not too bad.
07:14It's nice to see you again.
07:15How do you feel being here?
07:16Good.
07:17Good.
07:18To be honest, I think Kerry is more nervous than me.
07:20I think I'm pretty sure.
07:22Okay.
07:23Let's start with Paolo.
07:26You made a visit to Kerry's, we'll say the friendship family circle.
07:31Paolo met my best friend, Danielle.
07:33And Heidi was there.
07:35It was a really nice experience.
07:36She's a big strong character.
07:38Obviously you have to be if you're going to be close friends with Kerry as well.
07:41What are you laughing at?
07:46Strong character and some ear defenders, wouldn't Guy Miss?
07:50You could see that Kerry and Paolo are serious about each other.
07:53But I'm going to need to ask some difficult questions if they're going to move forward long term.
07:58So what would you say has been the hardest part of the relationship so far?
08:03For me, it's the press.
08:05I've sat him down.
08:06I've prepped him.
08:08I said, don't reply to anybody.
08:10Don't comment on anything.
08:12They're going to go into your friends, your family.
08:14They'll look into your past.
08:15The press put pictures of me topless, right?
08:17I used to be a PT.
08:19Jesus Christ.
08:20Look at the size of him.
08:21Any more of those photos knocking about?
08:26A lot of the comments were like,
08:27oh, it's like he's got no brain cells in his head or...
08:30There was once a time though that would have really impacted me.
08:33Now, I don't take that on board because that's their own projection.
08:36Because I care about this person a lot and I see a strong future.
08:39There's nothing that can be really thrown at us right now
08:42that we can't discuss, communicate on and talk about really as well.
08:47That's a big thing.
08:48It was like I said to you, please don't read any comments.
08:50Yeah.
08:51And he sent a message back on, they're empty words.
08:52Literally are.
08:53It's people just projecting their own emptiness on you.
08:57I've blocked out the noise because I'm really enjoying this connection
09:01and I just want to see it grow.
09:03The connection's been mind-blowing, I'm not going to lie.
09:07It's been...
09:08Yeah, it has. It has.
09:09I've not experienced anything like it.
09:10Honestly, it's like he's always been there.
09:13It's so amazing but I'm also very aware that it's being played out
09:17for everybody to see and watch.
09:19And that I don't like.
09:21Yeah, that can happen on a TV dating show.
09:24I mean, this is better than each one of us could have expected.
09:28Let me hit you with very challenging questions for couples
09:31to see how much you've talked about this.
09:33Who's doing the bins?
09:34OK, so the first is, have you discussed marriage?
09:37I'd marry Paolo in a heartbeat.
09:39I think he's amazing.
09:40I really would.
09:41Good to see after three marriages she's learnt to take it slow.
09:45Second question.
09:47This is a big topic.
09:49If you look down why couples divorce,
09:51right at the top is always around finances.
09:55Right?
09:56It gets ugly.
09:57Have you discussed if you're going to co-mingle the money?
10:01That makes me uncomfortable.
10:02Money makers, I've always been used for money.
10:04Yeah.
10:05I've always been the breadwinner.
10:06And this is unusual for me, having somebody else pay for things.
10:11Paolo, you know what the press is going to say.
10:13Yeah.
10:14The press is going to say, look at this young boy toy that Carrie has
10:17and she's paying for everything.
10:19Yeah.
10:20So already, get ahead of that by having the discussion right now.
10:24Yeah.
10:25So therefore, when the drama comes, you've already decided
10:28what your values are and what the execution play is going to be.
10:31100%.
10:32Right?
10:33I think that's going to be important.
10:34I say, before you even talk about marriage, you need to be talking about money.
10:39Basically, what they're saying is no prenup, no bunk-up, right?
10:43No, no.
10:44No.
10:45No.
10:46No.
10:47No.
10:48No.
10:49No.
10:50No.
10:51No.
10:52No.
10:53Prince
11:01Hello celebrity dating agency. Hey, Tom. Oh, hello Sammy. I'm in
11:06Hello Sammy. Hello. How are you? How are you? Good to see you. Oh, lovely to see you. Lovely to see you. Make yourself comfy. I'm not going to take this off, it's okay. Please, strip if you like. Yeah. Has he got two of the same shirt on?
11:35Yeah, double beige, babes. Well, I wore a little green today because your dipsis has swollen to three times the size, you know. Get some Savla on that, Tom, sharpish. I moved it to my bedroom and it's got so stunking. That's good. I think it's because I've put a champagne bottle in it. You put a champagne bottle in it? Mmm, this is what I do. I shove it into the root. I hope you took the cork out at least.
12:05Well, those two talk fierce. Let's see if things have gone flat over with the Triple J's. John, Jordan and Joe.
12:13What are your intentions, Jordan?
12:15Um, yeah, I'm hoping that obviously me and John continue this and see what happens. Like, I genuinely love...
12:25Whoa, whoa, whoa. Did he just drop the L-bomb?
12:28Being with him. False alarm, everyone. Stand down, stand down. Sorry, Katona's got to me.
12:33When I say love, I just mean, like, I love. Yeah, it's because he's Northern. I know, yeah. So am I love? Yeah.
12:39And I hear that you're a hairdresser. I am. Which is fantastic. What do you think of my fringe?
12:43Uh-oh. Say it looks amazing, Jordan. Don't look. Don't hesitate. Just say it's the best fringe in the history of fringes.
12:50I mean, I've... I...
12:52Jordan! Say you like it, Jordan! Yeah, he's fucked it.
12:58All the good, good feelings.
13:08Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating, where S Club John's squeeze, Jordan, is in a close shade.
13:14After S Club Joe quizzed him on a fringe. Don't get snippy now.
13:18I mean, I've... I...
13:21generally prefer you without a fringe.
13:24Because you've got good born... He ain't for you.
13:27Yeah, seriously though, don't fuck with a fringe.
13:32While those three laugh it up, back at the agency, P-Dawg has some serious questions for Kerry and Paolo.
13:39You know, we haven't talked about age difference. So what's the age difference between the two of you?
13:43Eleven years. Eleven years. Okay, so... He's older.
13:46Clearly!
13:49So... So, have you at all felt that difference? Not really. No.
13:54That age difference at all? No. No, not really.
13:56At first, for me, it was a big deal. I think that's my own insecurity. It's more of my problem than it was his problem.
14:01Yeah. Paolo's such an old soul, I think, and he's got... And I'm such an immature...
14:06I've not really grown up yet. So we kind of just, like, meet in the middle. He's into MILFs, anyway.
14:13MILFs? GILFs? Great GILFs? I'm not fussy.
14:17Do you think she's a MILF?
14:19I think she's a MILF. There we go. We're all in the same place.
14:21Oh, my God.
14:22You could see Carrie and Paolo are into each other, which is great. Now's the time to apply what we've been teaching them so they can guarantee their future together.
14:31We want this to go forever.
14:33Yeah.
14:34So do we.
14:35100%, yeah.
14:36And that's the reason why it's so important to talk about these things ahead of time.
14:39Lots to think about.
14:40Thank you very much.
14:41Thank you so much.
14:43All right, I need to go change my toxins, sweating that much.
14:47Thank you so much, guys.
14:49Thank you so much for your time.
14:50All right, see you later. Bye, darling.
14:52See you later, guys.
14:53My turn is done.
14:54No, go on. Okay.
14:55See you later.
14:56Let's go.
14:58Carrie Katona is in a committed relationship.
15:02I think it's the honeymoon period.
15:04And they need to have these tough conversations that we're asking them to have or they'll never be able to survive it.
15:09With those two lovebirds flapping off into the sunset,
15:13there's still one cross-examination to finish.
15:16Your heart's hit the beat.
15:18Let's see how S Club John and Jordan's hair-raising drink is going.
15:23Can you sing?
15:24No, I've heard him sing.
15:25Oh, you can't sing.
15:26Terrible.
15:27He's got this one going on.
15:28All right.
15:29Sexy dad at a wedding.
15:31Okay.
15:32Okay.
15:33That's good to see.
15:34That's it.
15:35Top off the whole jbang.
15:36I look forward to that.
15:37You two are very, very cute together.
15:40You make a lovely couple.
15:41I think we do make quite a good couple.
15:43You really, really do.
15:44And you've got a very beautiful, kind face.
15:47Good eyes.
15:48Yeah.
15:49You can see a lot about a person through the eyes.
15:51And even more from a stool sample.
15:53It's about time.
15:54I've told mummy.
15:55That never gets less creepy, does it?
15:57Oh, mummy.
15:58Wow.
15:59This must be quite a serious sort of thing.
16:01Yeah.
16:02Oh, you're going to love her.
16:03She wants her for you, I do.
16:04Yeah.
16:05Basically.
16:06Oh, yeah, of course.
16:07So do I.
16:08Yeah.
16:09Oh, no.
16:10Do you know what?
16:11You've got my stamp of approval.
16:12Oh, great.
16:13Now, about that fringe.
16:15It's nice to finally meet you.
16:16So, cheers.
16:17Cheers to you guys.
16:18Cheers, guys.
16:19I'm really, really happy for both of you.
16:21I really am.
16:22It's nice to see.
16:23Thanks, mate.
16:26It was great.
16:27I mean, I always loved seeing Jo, and I think she genuinely really liked Jordan.
16:32I think she would have told me otherwise.
16:33She would have told him otherwise, I think, as well.
16:35And he seemed to get on with her really well.
16:37I absolutely adored Jordan.
16:38I thought he was everything.
16:41If I could handpick someone for John, that would be it.
16:45And I really hope that I will be putting that hat on very, very soon.
16:50It's really nice that Jordan started to meet my friends.
16:52Obviously, Jo's the first one.
16:53And then, obviously, the big one is mummy.
16:56You've got to stop that mummy milk.
16:58I'm very excited, but still very keen to just take it one day at a time.
17:02But the future is looking very good.
17:04Oh, lovely stuff.
17:05And not one shitty S Club 7 pun.
17:07Really great work, guys.
17:09Yeah, the future's bright.
17:11Definitely.
17:12I think I will be reaching for the stars.
17:15Oh, for fuck's sake.
17:17Right, I'm telling mummy.
17:18While JJ head off, back at the agency, Sam and Tom are unbelievably still talking about greenery.
17:26There's something about house plants that just, they just do it for me.
17:30Weirdo.
17:33Hello.
17:34Hi, T.
17:35Do you have Sam there?
17:36Yes, he is.
17:37Oh, no.
17:38I was really enjoying that three-hour chat about plants.
17:41Shame.
17:42Great, yeah.
17:43Paul and I are ready.
17:44You could just send him up, please.
17:45Yes, certainly.
17:46All right.
17:47Bye, darling.
17:48Well.
17:49Am I off?
17:50My Baron of Botany.
17:51These are my favourite days, you know.
17:52I love the dating that this is.
17:53Do you?
17:54Oh, yeah.
17:55Oh, well, you're always welcome, you know.
17:57Thank you so much.
17:58Mi casa zu casa.
17:59Tom, thank you.
18:00You're very, very welcome.
18:02Enormous luck.
18:03Oh, he's gonna need it.
18:05At the brunch, Sam was feeling the squeeze with Mahan after flouncing out of their double date.
18:10Okay, Mahan, will you give Sam a second chance to go on a date with him again?
18:13Yeah.
18:14I would like to get to know him a little bit better.
18:15And even then, it was not plane sailing for him.
18:18More plane crashing into the sea and exploding into a shower of shit.
18:21Yeah, you're quite intriguing.
18:23Am I?
18:24Yeah.
18:25Even though you walked out on the date?
18:26Oh, yeah, I did.
18:27But despite the turbulence, he still managed to bag a post date drink.
18:31Let's just definitely go for a drink.
18:33Let's definitely, yeah, definitely.
18:34Let's do it.
18:38Come in.
18:39Hello.
18:40Sam.
18:41Sam the man.
18:42How are you?
18:43You know, we're really good.
18:45How are you?
18:46I'm good.
18:47You guys always look so immaculate.
18:48Well, same to you.
18:49Always so done up.
18:50Oh, they know, Sam.
18:51They know.
18:52So, let's talk about Mahan.
18:54Tell us about how that date went.
18:55We went to this ramen place, which is great.
18:57Yeah?
18:58Seeing you slurping up some ramen, that's exactly the date I want to see you in.
19:01Bit messy, you know?
19:02So, good date?
19:03Good date, yeah.
19:04Not great?
19:05When I like someone, I'm so in.
19:06Ah.
19:07I haven't had that feeling with Mahan.
19:09But I think she's beautiful, she's a bit older.
19:11I think it's quite interesting too.
19:12There you go.
19:13So, we asked Mahan if she thought you two made a good match.
19:17And she said, we have things in common.
19:20So do I and a horse, but I don't want to date one.
19:24So, I feel that yes, we could be good for each other.
19:27Okay?
19:28Good.
19:29We asked Mahan if she would like to see you again.
19:32And she said, she doesn't know.
19:36She said, he changes his mind so quickly.
19:40It feels like he's telling me what I want to hear.
19:43For example, after the date, when he asked me for a drink, but then left straight away.
19:49What?
19:50He's done another runner?
19:51I did obviously say, let's go for a drink, and then I just get in the car.
19:54But did you tell her that?
19:55Yeah, I said I'm going.
19:56But previous to that, you said, let's go for another drink?
19:59Yeah, I did, yeah.
20:00And then you turned?
20:01And then I went home.
20:05Okay.
20:06Okay.
20:07Sam continues to do this again and again on his dates.
20:10We've tried talking to him, but he just doesn't listen.
20:12He has a hard head.
20:13So it's now time to put him on the spot.
20:16And here she is.
20:18Only joking, I wish.
20:20I think you should call her.
20:21What now?
20:22You should totally call Mahan.
20:24Right now?
20:25What, right now?
20:26As in right now now?
20:27Yes, why not?
20:28Oh yes, fucking please.
20:30While those three work out the agency Wi-Fi code,
20:33downstairs our next celeb seeking connection is arriving.
20:37It's our very own human hotspot, Donna Preston.
20:42Oh, my chum.
20:45Come in, love.
20:47We got the fire, so powerful.
20:49We got the grace, we got the love.
20:54Sunshine, my only sunshine.
21:00You make me happy when skies are grey.
21:04You'll never know, dear.
21:07How much I love you.
21:08So have I taken acid?
21:09What the fuck is this?
21:11Please don't take my sunshine away.
21:17Well, that's enough of that bollocks.
21:19Back upstairs then to see Sam pluck up the courage to ask Mahan on another day.
21:23This is my chance.
21:24My hair looks good.
21:25Come on, Sam.
21:26Time to make it up to her.
21:27Try not to hang up in a panic and jump out the window.
21:30Here we go.
21:33Mahan!
21:34Hello.
21:35Hi.
21:36I'm good, how are you?
21:37I'm good.
21:38How was your weekend?
21:39And my weekend was...
21:40I had a lovely time.
21:41Yeah.
21:42I really enjoyed our day, by the way.
21:44Oh, yeah.
21:45I thought we got on well.
21:46You enjoyed the ramen.
21:48You did a runner again.
21:50I enjoyed our chat.
21:51I think it was sweet.
21:55No, the day itself went really well.
21:57I agree.
21:58Like, I had a really good time with you.
22:00And then obviously we were supposed to go for a drink and then you bounced up.
22:03So I was a little bit confused.
22:05Yeah, I would...
22:06I just wanted an early night.
22:07Yeah, and he couldn't find a plant sitter.
22:09But I...
22:10I would love to go for that drink with you again.
22:18Erm...
22:19Wait, I mean...
22:23I feel like I'm begging.
22:24That's because you are.
22:35Ooh, ooh, ooh.
22:36What you doing?
22:38I think I'm gonna fall for an adieu.
22:41Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
22:45Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating, where Sam is fumbling like a mole after a cataract operation
22:50as he tries to convince Mahan to go on another date.
22:53Sam, not the mole.
22:54I think we just need to get to know each other more.
23:00Especially after what happened, you know, in...
23:03When we went to, er, the vineyard.
23:05Ah, the first time you ran out on a great daze.
23:12That's great.
23:13Was that a yes?
23:14OK, sounds good.
23:15Really look forward to seeing you.
23:17Bye-bye.
23:18Imagine what she'd be like if she wasn't looking forward to it.
23:21Guys, FaceTime's not my thing.
23:24We could chill.
23:26That was miserable, though, man.
23:27Thanks, man.
23:30That was miserable.
23:31You know why, Sam?
23:32Why?
23:33Because that's...
23:34You're having to actually do you.
23:36Yeah.
23:37Real, OK?
23:38This is real life, OK?
23:40And I think that is the challenge that you have.
23:43Do you know what it is?
23:44I feel like I haven't...
23:46I haven't been able to fully be me at times.
23:48Yeah.
23:49Because this is how it feels, right?
23:51Yeah.
23:52You've come here, and you've been very intentional
23:54about showing a different side.
23:56But unfortunately, that different side that you've shown
23:59is not your true self.
24:02It's a version of yourself.
24:06In order for us to truly help you,
24:08we have to know truly who you are.
24:12Well, the way that someone knows you give a vague shit
24:15is by asking better questions.
24:18Ask her, where do you see yourself in ten years' time?
24:20I haven't said that once.
24:21What's your favourite colour and stuff?
24:22No-one cares about what your favourite food is.
24:23No-one gives a shit about your holiday.
24:24I did use that check.
24:25No-one cares about your favourite zoo animal.
24:27Pizza, Lanzarote, Capybara.
24:29If Sam wants to make any progress, he needs to get real.
24:33It's great that he wants to change the perception around him,
24:36but only he can make this real change.
24:39He just needs to drop the facade
24:41and turn up to date as his real self.
24:44But who is the real Sam Prince?
24:47Sam, thank you.
24:48I really hope you feel that we do have, you know,
24:50nothing but love for you.
24:52Thank you, guys. I appreciate you all. Thank you.
24:54Much love. Have fun with Mahana.
24:55We can't wait to hear how it goes.
24:56Thank you, guys. Thank you. Bye-bye.
24:58Bye-bye. See you later.
24:59Bye-bye.
25:09As Captain Bage buggers off,
25:11across town the man with more brain cells than I've had hot dinners,
25:15and I've had a shitload,
25:17Mark is on his way to his third date with Deanne.
25:19I'm really looking forward to seeing Deanne again.
25:21She's fantastic. I know she'll look amazing.
25:24Last time we saw Mark, he was on a date with Josie,
25:28and despite her being a keen bean...
25:30I can't cook, Mark. If you want to get married, I can't cook.
25:32But I'm brilliant at maths.
25:34Give me 244 times... whatever.
25:37Mark only had eyes for one lady.
25:39She was nice but wasn't for me.
25:41Can I have another date with Deanna, please?
25:43Well, I'm not saying no to him. He's fucking enormous.
25:45The agents want me to do her homework to basically put her on the spot a bit more,
25:53and almost like, what are her intentions?
25:55Is she planning to seduce me or something?
25:57You'll know if she brings a box to stand on.
25:59We already established I'm useless at reading romantic cues.
26:03I more or less go on what they say, and occasionally little things like,
26:07is she smiling or whatever? That's about it.
26:10Well, keep them peeled, Beastie, and who knows?
26:13You might be in a cab to Snogsville.
26:17Someone whose journey to Snogsville has been delayed by a stop-off at Shit Date Junction
26:21is Donna, who is heading up to see the agents.
26:24Hello!
26:26Donna!
26:27My queen!
26:28You two look fantastic.
26:29Why, thank you.
26:30You look amazing.
26:31Ray of sunshines.
26:32Are you okay?
26:33We are fabulous.
26:34Yes!
26:35How are you?
26:36I'm good, thank you.
26:39Donna's last date with Mike got off to a shaky start.
26:43You host a podcast?
26:44What's that about?
26:45I do, yeah.
26:46I wear my geekdom on my sleeve.
26:47Very proud of it.
26:48Yeah.
26:49It's called Attack of the 50 Foot Nerds.
26:50Okay.
26:51And then got shakier, killed over, and fell into a ditch on fire.
26:56I'm a big fan of Lego.
26:57My birthday's coming up in a few weeks.
26:59Yeah.
27:00I've booked a week off work.
27:01Right.
27:02I'm going to build the old 1966 Adam West Batmobile.
27:05Right.
27:06I think she's more of a Michael Keaton fan.
27:09Mike was really sweet.
27:11No spark.
27:13Just not my cup of tea.
27:16Huh.
27:17Yeah.
27:18Well, that sounds like a shit date, and I'm sorry.
27:20Remind me who sets them up, Dr T.
27:22I'm not saying it wasn't a crack date.
27:24Yes.
27:25You'd already picked out flaws.
27:26But you did look like my ex.
27:29We've noticed that Donna is shutting dates down quite quickly.
27:32If she's not finding any connection, that really is fine,
27:35because, I mean, it does just happen.
27:37However, my concern is that Donna isn't giving these guys a chance,
27:40and if she's not doing that, then basically she's self-sabotaging
27:43her chances at finding love.
27:45Have you enjoyed any of your dates that you've been on so far
27:48at the agency?
27:49Mmm.
27:50No.
27:52I enjoyed Gary's banter with the old Gazette.
27:57We had a good time.
27:58I just don't think I've connected with anyone yet.
28:02How do you know that something is brewing there?
28:06I feel like I have touched base on love with someone who I couldn't have
28:11because they were in an arranged marriage.
28:16And that feeling was just incredible.
28:19It was like something, like I was, it sounds bizarre, but I was, I felt nauseous
28:25because I was so excited, you know?
28:28And he made me laugh all the time and he cared.
28:31But I don't know if that was real.
28:34I'm not sure.
28:36So, yeah, maybe, I don't know.
28:39Was it love or was it infatuation?
28:42Probably.
28:43It was probably infatuation.
28:45It's confusing.
28:46I have experienced both.
28:48I mean, I still do.
28:49But I think infatuation can be extremely strong.
28:53Yeah.
28:54That most people I know can't distinguish.
28:58But so what's the difference between that and love then?
29:01Love is a combination of intimacy, passion and commitment.
29:06Okay.
29:07And love is also a verb.
29:10It's an action.
29:11It isn't just a feeling.
29:13Okay.
29:14It's an action.
29:15While Donna discovers love.
29:20Someone else on the lookout for action is Mark, who is taking Deanne out for a curry
29:24on their third date where he wants to work out what her intentions are for him.
29:28I love his personality.
29:30I love the way he is.
29:32We're taking every day as it comes.
29:35And we go from there.
29:37Sounds hopeful, Beastie.
29:38Let's get on with it.
29:39Hello there.
29:40Hello.
29:41Wow, you look amazing.
29:42As always.
29:44Straight in for the shoulder kiss.
29:45Saucy boy.
29:46Well, gorgeous weather.
29:47I know.
29:48Beautiful companion.
29:49And curry.
29:50Don't go too heavy on the spice though, Mark.
29:51You don't want to be asking Deanne to the gala from the gents.
29:52We're on the date.
29:53It's going well.
29:54Now to keep my eyes peeled for any signs that she might find me attractive.
29:57So these were the old spice warehouses, I believe, when it city of London, and they've converted
30:12it.
30:13Really?
30:14That's why the design is, they were big warehouses and offices on top.
30:19Presumably, we're pretty close to the docks where they bought the spices and stuff from
30:24all over the world.
30:28Fascinating.
30:29You know, I love history.
30:31I absolutely love history.
30:33I mean, I don't know about Deanne, but I find Beastie way more attractive after that
30:37history lesson.
30:38Doc me.
30:42Anyway, back at the agency, Donna is looking for help trying to put her dating disasters
30:46in the past.
30:47What is your dating goal or relationship goal?
30:51I think at the moment, it's to have a nice first date.
30:55To laugh on a first date.
30:57Right.
30:58And that's, just got to get that first.
31:01Yeah, okay.
31:02And then we can think about the second and the third and so on.
31:06Are you excited to go on a date?
31:09Uh, if I am honest, no.
31:19If I'm really thinking about it, I'm not excited.
31:22I just can't be fucked to get ready again if I'm honest.
31:25You know, I'm wasting all these bloody eyelashes.
31:28I get it.
31:29I'm wasting all this bloody makeup and setting spray.
31:32You look fierce.
31:33You look hot.
31:34Yeah.
31:35Okay.
31:36And try and think of the dates, not as a chore.
31:39You know, the dating pool, you know, you have to be in it to win it.
31:42Okay.
31:43You really do.
31:44Now, we would love to wave a magic wand and go, ta-da.
31:47If we did that, we'd be trillionaires.
31:49Yeah.
31:50Okay, the only way to really find that perfect person or as near as that fits for you is
31:56to get out there, kid, and get those lashes on and go and try again and again and again,
32:02because you never know what you could be missing out on.
32:06Okay.
32:07On that note, should we show your next date?
32:09Oh, my God, yeah.
32:10Come on, man.
32:11Yes, girl.
32:12Oh, my God.
32:13There you go.
32:14Okay.
32:15Bloody hell, someone's perked up.
32:16Ben.
32:17Ben?
32:18Billy Rickey.
32:19Hey.
32:20Come on, we.
32:21Lead, lead, lead, lead, lead.
32:22Electrician, 37, six foot, a Virgo, like someone fiery.
32:27Okay.
32:28That's what we're thinking about old Betty Boy there, wearing a white jean.
32:31White jeans is a confident man.
32:34Oh, um, yeah, Ben looks sweet.
32:38Okay, well, she's not completely shut it down, yet.
32:42Bare minimum, we want you to have fun.
32:44Yes.
32:45We want to have something that makes you feel good, that you walk away and you're like,
32:47that was worth sticking my lashes on.
32:49Shove all the ones that haven't worked out for you to the side.
32:51They've just been the warm-up act for Ben.
32:53Okay.
32:54For Ben.
32:55Mm-hmm.
32:56Benny Boy.
32:57Come on then, Ben.
32:59Have fun.
33:00Cheers.
33:01Goodbye.
33:02Bye, darling.
33:04Bye.
33:05Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.
33:06Pepper.
33:07Go for the second day.
33:08I've Chase!
33:10They're not vaping yet.
33:12She's deflated.
33:13We know that happens when you have a couple of crap dates one after the other.
33:14It's hard to motivate but it only takes one person.
33:19While Donna heads out looking for the one...
33:21The man who seems to meet the one on every date, Louis, is arriving for his third date with Harriet.
33:29But one was not enough for our man at the brunch as he asked both Alana and Harriet out, greedy boy.
33:35I really get on with both of you two, so if you would like to go on a date, Harriet and Alana.
33:44But his date with Alana fizzled out quicker than an underwater fireworks display.
33:49It's no point, like, dragging something along. I've got a train to catch.
33:55Oh, you've got a train? Yeah.
33:58So let's hope this goes better, or he could be heading to the gala on his own.
34:02My game plan is just being myself.
34:04Throughout the whole experience, I've had pressure of, like, Liv or other girls and boundaries and all this shizer.
34:09Oh, I didn't know he's back on the Deutsche.
34:12So now I'm going to go in there and just be myself.
34:15Hopefully we'll have some fun.
34:16I'm still not going to kiss her because I told myself I ain't going to do that no more.
34:20You've just got to start listening to yourself now.
34:23Have I kissed every single girl that I've tried to?
34:25Um, I think I've lost count.
34:28That's outrageous.
34:30This is my second date with Louis.
34:31I'm really excited because at the brunch I got a really good vibe from him.
34:35But I feel a little uneasy.
34:36If Louis is serious about me, I want him to make it known today that it's just me and only me.
34:42I'm just wanting an answer.
34:43She sounds like she means business, Lulu.
34:48Hello.
34:49Hello, hello.
34:50How are you doing?
34:50You OK?
34:51I'm good, thank you.
34:51How are you?
34:52I'm good, I'm good.
34:53You look nice.
34:54Appreciate it.
34:55You look great too.
34:56You've bowled before, have you?
34:57Yeah, have you?
34:59Nah, I've never bowled.
35:00So you're shit?
35:02I wouldn't say shit.
35:03Nah, he's lying, Harriet.
35:04He strikes me as a man who knows his way around the lanes.
35:07OK, maybe not.
35:10All right, let me see it then.
35:12You've got a little curl on that.
35:15You all right, Lulu?
35:19There we go.
35:20She does it when it matters.
35:25Harriet is smashing me at bowling.
35:27But when you look that good, I don't mind a bit of competition.
35:31No, you're already getting me.
35:33Just give it a try.
35:34Let's go and get a drink instead of it.
35:43Yeah, let's go.
35:44Yeah, I think she's embarrassed you enough.
35:46Time for you to do it for a bit.
35:48Name another sport you think you'd beat me up.
35:50I can do any sport, like rounders, cricket, basketball.
35:53What about tennis?
35:54Tennis, I'm good.
35:56Tennis, yeah, yeah.
35:56But gymnastics, I can do that.
35:58Yeah, you've done the splits.
35:59Yeah.
36:00Have you got any other tricks?
36:02Can you put your legs behind your head?
36:04Well, like, now.
36:05Don't tempt him, Harriet.
36:10Probably not now, no.
36:11Probably don't do that now.
36:12Oh, no.
36:13No.
36:14I think that's more like...
36:16Later.
36:17Later?
36:18Yeah, there's a nine-year-old's birthday party starting on the next lane.
36:21Might put them off their nuggets.
36:22Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating, where Louis is trying to strike it lucky on his bowling
36:38date with Harriet.
36:38Do you know what?
36:40I try and keep it, like, PG when I chat to you.
36:43PG?
36:44I'm not sure you'd get Woody asking Bo Peet to stick her legs behind her head.
36:48But okay.
36:48Yeah, why?
36:49I feel like I don't want to overstep no boundary, because I feel like I'm being a good man,
36:56isn't it?
36:56So, are you thinking up here?
36:58Yeah.
36:58Good.
36:59That's good.
37:00I'm thinking with this head and not that head.
37:02Uh-huh.
37:03That's good.
37:04That head comes near.
37:05Is that natural, though?
37:05Like, is that what you want to do?
37:07Like, do you...
37:08I want to think of this head instead of this head.
37:09This head gets me in more trouble than this head.
37:11Well, yeah.
37:12Yeah.
37:13I'd rather...
37:15Yeah, that's good, though.
37:15...look into this one.
37:17Because this has got a lot to give, actually.
37:19More than...
37:19More is crazy, because he's got a lot to give, too.
37:23Probably, like, equal amounts.
37:25Just don't put the heads together, Louis.
37:27You don't want to be a dickhead.
37:28God!
37:34While Louis brings the flirt on his date, let's check in to see if Mark is still feeling
37:38the heat on his 50-an.
37:42Spicy, but lovely.
37:43Very spicy, but I'm enjoying it.
37:45It is spicy.
37:46Ha-ha-ha-ha.
37:47Oh, someone's gone a bit heavy on the lime pickle.
37:50Ha-ha-ha.
37:54I ain't got no water.
37:56Oh, ha-ha.
37:56I am struggling here.
37:57It is spicy, yeah.
37:58I find taking a swig from an empty glass always helps.
38:02I thought this guy was supposed to be a genius.
38:04So, when you went to the agency...
38:06Yeah.
38:06What did you ask for?
38:09Tall and intelligent.
38:11No, I ain't intelligent.
38:13And you aren't tall either, but at least you aren't drinking out of an empty glass.
38:17Just because I said that's what I'd like, ultimately you'd go, give it a try.
38:22So, all these little things, when I'm on a date with you, I'm watching and learning and
38:28I'm thinking, the type of man I want to be with.
38:31That's very kind of you.
38:33I must say, I felt quite protected by you.
38:38I think that comes instinctively.
38:41Maybe that is something old-fashioned about me.
38:44Yeah.
38:44We've got three dates now and absolutely no red flags for you and quite a few green flags or whatever, so yippee.
38:53While those two take it slow, back on Louie's date with Harriet, things are speeding up.
38:59How do you feel about, like, going forwards?
39:04Like, you ready for, like, a long-term thing?
39:08I think I'm over being single, whether that means with someone or without someone, that I don't know.
39:15You kind of have to be on your own to be single, mate.
39:18I'm fine right now on my own, but I'm probably better with someone.
39:23Like, I definitely ain't casually dating like I used to.
39:26The chat's getting quite heavy, but you know what, I don't mind it.
39:29Harriet's putting me on the spot a bit, but I'm going to explain what my values are and hopefully she feels the same.
39:35Like, my whole mindset has shifted to a different responsibility and value.
39:40Yeah.
39:40I've stabled myself into knowing my route clearer, and not only am I going to walk that path, but I'm going to make a motorway to my goals.
39:48Why are you talking about motorways?
39:51It's four lanes, you know.
39:52Yeah.
39:53Actually, fuck it.
39:53Add another one.
39:54Make it five lanes.
39:55Add a hard shoulder as well, you sexy bastard.
39:59So I'm, like, I'm so focused on that.
40:02Yeah.
40:03That fifth lane might be a beautiful lane, yeah?
40:07I mean, I've seen better metaphors written in the toilets of Pease Pottage Services.
40:11So while Louis dreams of pulling into Harriet's service station or whatever they're banging on about, Mark is starting to go up the gears on his date with Deanne.
40:19The agents, they've given me all kinds of homework to do with you, and I'm going...
40:24Homework?
40:25Like what?
40:26Right, I think it's time we get a little bit deeper and find out exactly where each of us think this is going.
40:31They want me to ask, like, what are your intentions?
40:34And I'm going, are you my dad?
40:37But ultimately, my feeling is other people can have their standards, that's fine by them.
40:42As long as I'm happy with my standards and you're happy with your standards and you're happy with my standards, that's all that matters.
40:48Standard.
40:49It's like, do you get on, but it's your personality that you're left with.
40:55You put us two together, you would think, it ain't going to work.
40:59I am in the right sense of word, quite slow, and what I mean by that is...
41:04You're shit at drinking water?
41:06I don't jump in.
41:08I almost stop and think and go, let's not rush and say anything I might regret or do anything I might regret.
41:16So the important question is, assuming you'd like another date, would you like to go to the gala?
41:31Yes, I would.
41:33Yes, Beastie, a bit round the houses, but we got there eventually.
41:36Sip, sip, drink, drink.
41:38Good work.
41:38I'm delighted.
41:40Deanne's great fun to be around and I'm looking forward to taking her to the gala.
41:44Well, she must like me.
41:45Logic dictates you don't go on a fourth date without really liking someone.
41:49However, romance and logic rarely mix.
41:52Just like me and regular-sized condoms, but sometimes you've got to try and squeeze it in.
41:56Come on, Beastie boy.
41:58Shall we go?
41:59Let's go.
42:01Mark is ticking the boxes.
42:03He's a real gentleman and every single date that I've been on, that's come across quite clearly.
42:12I think there's a romantic spark coming, but time will tell.
42:19Bye, it's been great fun.
42:21And I'll see you next week.
42:24Farewell.
42:25Wonderful evening.
42:27Farewell.
42:29Double cheek kiss.
42:31Slow down, Casadova.
42:32We had a lot of fun.
42:33We had a good chat about important things and not-so-important things.
42:38We're certainly getting a closer attachment and it's really nice.
42:42Deanna likes me.
42:43That's the only thing that matters.
42:47Well, one successful date done.
42:49Let's see how our metaphor man Louis is getting on with his date, Harriet.
42:53A king always needs a queen to build his empire.
42:56That's what Henry VIII thought.
42:57Look at the mess he got into.
42:58Divorce, beheaded, survived.
42:59Divorce, beheaded, died.
43:00I feel like you're ready for someone to enjoy life with.
43:04Are you open to that or not?
43:06It depends.
43:07Are you willing to work on it?
43:09I kind of go with it.
43:10Like, whatever will be, will be.
43:11And if it works, I'm going with it until whatever happens.
43:14I've really enjoyed this date with Harriet.
43:18She's great vibes.
43:19She's facey.
43:20I can actually see something going on it.
43:22I think I only want to date you from now on then.
43:25I don't think I need to go on another date with someone else.
43:27Yeah, that doesn't mean that, like, oh, we're exclusive and it's just me and you.
43:33No, it's just I don't want to date someone else, innit?
43:36Yeah, good.
43:37I'm glad because feelings mutual.
43:40I love being around you.
43:41I love, no, I love your company.
43:43Like, I love being around you.
43:45Don't mention love, Harriet.
43:46Quick, whack your feet behind your head to distract him.
43:49I'm going to need you to sit here, I think.
43:51I'm going to sit there.
43:53See, look, look at this.
43:55Oh, service, look at that.
43:57Oh, you're a bit more down, though.
43:58Yeah, I'm a bit smart.
43:59I feel like I need to be close enough.
44:01Yeah, shove over.
44:02He can't see the bowling of you in the way.
44:04I'm serious about not seeing no one else.
44:06And when I say I just want to see you, I mean it, innit?
44:10Oh, OK.
44:11Good to see you, he's listening to the whole no-kissing advice he gave himself.
44:27Come on, man.
44:29What a lovely day.
44:31So nice.
44:31Really nice day.
44:32Yeah, really nice.
44:33That was definitely my best day at the agency.
44:35For the fifth time, that's pretty good going.
44:37Yeah, me and Harriet just get on, man.
44:39She's a beautiful girl.
44:40We have good vibes, good energy.
44:41The kiss was worth the wait, I think.
44:44I think the agents will be proud.
44:45I'm proud of myself.
44:46Oh, he's all grown up, isn't he?
44:48I'm excited.
44:49Louis made it clear that he only wants to date me.
44:52I'm like a little child.
44:53I don't want to be like, get it.
44:55But it was good.
44:56Hopefully, see you soon.
44:58I think you will.
44:59Yeah.
45:02Inside, I really wanted to scream, like...
45:04Oh, come on, you could do better than that.
45:08That's the one.
45:09I miss.
45:11Miss you.
45:13Turns out all you need to do to win Louis over is awkwardly tuck your shirt into your bra.
45:17Strange world.
45:18Obviously, it's still early doors.
45:20I don't know where it's going to go or how it's going to be, but she's facey, got a nice
45:24body, good personality.
45:25She's fun to talk to.
45:27She's got that perfect...
45:28Go on.
45:30Balance.
45:31Oh, very mature of you.
45:32I thought he was going to say arse.
45:34Cheers.
45:35Tomorrow night.
45:36What's your love language?
45:38That was rude.
45:42It's S Club Heaven for S Club John.
45:44I've met someone who is absolutely like me, and I wouldn't change over the world.
45:49Liv serves up some humble pie.
45:51Anything else you're allergic to or...
45:53Men.
45:55And Sam takes a pie right to the face.
45:59I don't want to do this anymore.
46:01I'm going to go.
46:03As our celebs...
46:04Go!
46:06I feel good about everything.
46:08Dating!
46:08A beacon of why this agency is the best in the world.
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44:39
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