- 4 weeks ago
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00:00The End
00:00:30The End
00:01:00Has the main feature started yet?
00:01:18No, sir. You're just in time.
00:01:19All right, Vaughan.
00:01:25Around the block, for the ninth time,
00:01:29it's a merry-go-round.
00:01:32You know that for the last six months,
00:01:33I haven't seen the beginning or the end of a picture.
00:01:36Every time when we come to the theater,
00:01:38the girl has already been torn from a lover's arms.
00:01:40When we go out, they haven't been reunited yet.
00:01:43I see nothing but unhappiness.
00:01:45Please, for once, let us stay until the happy end.
00:01:49But, Philippe, you know how people swarm the lobby
00:01:52when the picture begins and ends?
00:01:54It isn't safe.
00:01:55Love is never safe.
00:01:57You must do things dangerously.
00:01:59But think of my position, my husband.
00:02:02I tell you what you're going to do.
00:02:03I'll think of your husband if you'll think of me.
00:02:05Huh?
00:02:12Well, has it started?
00:02:13Not yet, sir. You can still make it.
00:02:15Drive on.
00:02:16When we are not together, you do think of me, don't you?
00:02:25Philippe, you know I do.
00:02:27What?
00:02:27Now, when you think of me,
00:02:29then you think sometimes it might be nice if we kiss the hand.
00:02:36Yes.
00:02:38You see?
00:02:39And when we are together, you lose your nerves.
00:02:42You're being cool, Philippe.
00:02:43A taxi is just not the place to kiss in.
00:02:47No?
00:02:48A lot of people would be surprised to know that.
00:02:56Well, what about it?
00:02:57Now you're too late.
00:02:58The picture's been on for three minutes.
00:03:00Good.
00:03:04How much?
00:03:0626 frames.
00:03:09Huh.
00:03:13Give me my ticket, and you wait until I'm seated.
00:03:24I'm not disturbing you, am I?
00:03:26One.
00:03:27Two.
00:03:30Seat 66 and 68.
00:03:33What?
00:03:3445 francs with tax.
00:03:3745 out of 100.
00:03:38Second seat, please.
00:03:42Second seat, please.
00:03:58Second seat, please.
00:04:02This aisle, next usher.
00:04:04Yoo-hoo!
00:04:05There's a step there, sir.
00:04:08Oh, is there?
00:04:17I like that.
00:04:18Yeah, good.
00:04:20Isn't it?
00:04:24May I come up?
00:04:25Time in its flight, dear, is death to the flight, dear, of slow-spoken lovers.
00:04:38Just speak back.
00:04:39Like me.
00:04:44Just when we're started, we find that we're parted by reasons appropriate.
00:04:54Let us dispense with our conventions and goals.
00:05:06Let us invent something more.
00:05:12Secret rendezvous.
00:05:13A place to dream, a dream or two.
00:05:23Sun, the mass that I'm above.
00:05:32Let me see your program, will you?
00:05:34Just like Romeo, met Juliet, I'll come to you, whispering a song of love.
00:05:48I think this will turn out all right.
00:05:49Oh, our hearts december, we'll kiss, and as we tremble, the stars will all assemble, a horoscope of bliss.
00:06:05See how these Americans make love, any place.
00:06:08Our balcony is out of doors.
00:06:10Will be the love I pledge to you, in our secret rendezvous.
00:06:20At last.
00:06:21Now, come on now.
00:06:22Why, you!
00:06:23You, you!
00:06:24This is a hug!
00:06:25How dare you!
00:06:26Mademoiselle, I, I thought...
00:06:27Well, I don't care what you thought.
00:06:28It's what you did.
00:06:29Down in front.
00:06:30We can't see through you.
00:06:31Come on!
00:06:32Come on!
00:06:33Come on!
00:06:34Come on!
00:06:35Come on!
00:06:36Come on!
00:06:37Come on!
00:06:38Come on!
00:06:39Come on!
00:06:40Come on!
00:06:41Come on!
00:06:42Come on!
00:06:43Come on!
00:06:44Come on!
00:06:45Come on!
00:06:46Come on!
00:06:47Come on!
00:06:48Come on!
00:06:49Come on!
00:06:50Come on!
00:06:51Come on!
00:06:52Come on!
00:06:53Come on!
00:06:54Come on!
00:06:55Come on!
00:06:56Ah!
00:06:57What's going on here?
00:06:58Did someone try to steal your bag?
00:07:01Not at all, madame.
00:07:02That, that creature kissed me.
00:07:04Oh!
00:07:05Is that all?
00:07:06I'm straight of affairs.
00:07:07It's all the fault of the government.
00:07:09Of course it is!
00:07:11When the government gets slack, the public morals...
00:07:13...gets slacker!
00:07:14...
00:07:22Messieurs, eh mesdames!
00:07:23In this emergency, our society for the protection...
00:07:28...of public morals...
00:07:29...of which I have the honor to be the president...
00:07:32...will show its power!
00:07:35Who are you, the censor?
00:07:37We censor the censors!
00:07:39Yes.
00:07:40Mademoiselle?
00:07:43I assure you, you are only making matters worse by...
00:07:46Oh, really? You think it was I who kissed you?
00:07:48Oh, did you?
00:07:49But of course, you didn't.
00:07:52Well, did you kiss her, yes or no?
00:07:55Madame, in a way, perhaps, you couldn't call it an...
00:07:58Say no more!
00:08:00It's only too clear.
00:08:02You!
00:08:03Why, you're a monster!
00:08:05Madame!
00:08:07You don't frighten me!
00:08:09Well, you frighten me, all right?
00:08:10You scare me to death.
00:08:13Well, now, Madame, I have business to attend...
00:08:18Oh, no, you don't!
00:08:20Not without attacking me, too!
00:08:22Well, in that case, Madame, I won't budge.
00:08:26Now, here.
00:08:27Oh, la police!
00:08:27What's all this about?
00:08:28La police!
00:08:29There!
00:08:30There, you have the victim!
00:08:33And this is the culprit?
00:08:34Yes!
00:08:34What's she done?
00:08:40Just a minute!
00:08:41One minute!
00:08:42What did she say I did?
00:08:46Oh!
00:08:47No!
00:08:48Nothing of the sort!
00:08:50She's making things up!
00:08:51I merely kissed, mademoiselle, that's all!
00:08:53Is that what all this fuss is about?
00:08:54Yes!
00:08:55Oh!
00:08:56So that's the way you guard the public morals, is it, you police?
00:08:59I'll take your number!
00:09:00Oh, but, Madame, this is absurd!
00:09:02I scream naturally out of surprise, but there's no need to carry on like this!
00:09:05I demand this man be punished!
00:09:08Yes!
00:09:08Be quiet!
00:09:09It wasn't you he kissed!
00:09:11No!
00:09:11If I'd kissed her, she wouldn't have said a word!
00:09:15Well, all I can do is make out a report!
00:09:17Now, what's your name?
00:09:18I am Horton...
00:09:19Not you!
00:09:20You!
00:09:21Philippe Martin, Savoy Theater!
00:09:23Ah!
00:09:24An actor?
00:09:25Yes!
00:09:26Ah!
00:09:27And your name, mademoiselle?
00:09:29Monique Pellerin, Avenue Du Bois.
00:09:31Pellerin!
00:09:32The publisher of the Morning Journal!
00:09:34He's my father.
00:09:35Ladies, I'm not interested in some maniac bothering a girl at the cinema.
00:09:39I'm not interested in your organization.
00:09:41As a matter of fact, I'm not interested in you.
00:09:43Monsieur Pellerin, I am Horton.
00:09:46What if the girl happened to be your daughter?
00:09:49Well, fortunately for me, such is not the case.
00:09:54Your daughter, Monique, was the girl at the cinema!
00:09:59What?
00:10:02Well, I assure you, Cecile, it was a scandal.
00:10:04And you, a girl about to be married, what will Count Alfredo think?
00:10:07Oh, he'll think whatever I want him to think.
00:10:09And your father?
00:10:10He'll blame me for it, because I'm supposed to be with you every minute and I wasn't.
00:10:13Don't worry, my dear.
00:10:15Father will never know a thing about it.
00:10:17Ladies, the incident is closed.
00:10:18That is far from being the opinion of the Minister of Justice.
00:10:22The Minister of Justice?
00:10:23You mean to say you've been to the Minister of Justice?
00:10:25You mentioned my daughter's name?
00:10:27The Minister has the same information we gave to the papers.
00:10:30Papers? What papers?
00:10:31All the papers!
00:10:33Your good name, Monsieur Pellerin, will be defended in spite of you.
00:10:36Just a moment, ladies, please.
00:10:38Kindly leave the defending of my good name to me.
00:10:40And restrict your activities to your own affairs.
00:10:42Good day.
00:10:43You are turning us out, Monsieur Pellerin?
00:10:45You're not bothering the Minister with a little thing like a kiss at the cinema.
00:10:48Why didn't you go to the League of Nations?
00:10:49Ladies, let us leave.
00:10:51Now, don't let me detain you.
00:10:53Sir, I am rotant.
00:10:54We are leaving.
00:10:58I am rotant, sir.
00:11:00Oh, such rot, such nonsense.
00:11:03And you, you, mademoiselle, would you make such a fuss about a little kiss?
00:11:07Oh, no, sir.
00:11:12You, uh, you wouldn't sight the fellow's face, would you?
00:11:16Oh, no, sir.
00:11:18Well, it's a matter of temperament, that's all.
00:11:22Is it my fault if a man wants to kiss me?
00:11:24Yes, it is.
00:11:25Unless it's Alfredo.
00:11:27You must think of him.
00:11:28Oh, I am.
00:11:34Oh, but no, no.
00:11:36Have you no soul?
00:11:38Give me something more, uh, uh, more discreet.
00:11:41Yes, my dear Count.
00:11:43We have another here.
00:11:45Ah, yes, here it is.
00:11:47Now, there is something that any woman would like.
00:11:50Yes, but I don't want something any woman would like.
00:11:53Think of this lovely creature, a, um, a...
00:11:58A lily in the field?
00:11:59Ah, yes.
00:12:01Yes, George?
00:12:03And Misselle Pellera on the telephone, sir.
00:12:16Ah, my sweet, my sweet.
00:12:18Hello.
00:12:19When you come to dinner this evening, I want you to tell father that you and I spent the afternoon
00:12:23together.
00:12:24But, darling, I tell you that is impossible.
00:12:27I was at the Turkish bath.
00:12:29Alfredo, no matter what happens, you're to remember to tell father that you were with
00:12:34me.
00:12:34All right, adorable.
00:12:36Ta-ta.
00:12:43Darling.
00:12:43Uh, Monique, uh, what did you do interesting today?
00:12:55Oh, I was with Alfredo.
00:12:58Wasn't I, Alfredo?
00:13:00What?
00:13:01Oh, uh, oh, yes, yes.
00:13:03Yes, we, uh...
00:13:04We had lunch in the Bois, from there to the dressmakers.
00:13:07And then to the Turkish bath, and...
00:13:10Oh, no, now, how silly of me to mention that.
00:13:14Yes, quite.
00:13:16Well, Monique, go on.
00:13:18Uh, then we went to the cinema.
00:13:21Yes, uh, yes, I was there, too.
00:13:24Well, well, tell me about it.
00:13:27Was it, uh...
00:13:28Oh, most amusing.
00:13:29You should have been there.
00:13:30Yes, yes, evidently, I, I missed something, all right.
00:13:34Well, come on.
00:13:43Uh, tell me about it.
00:13:43What, what's the mystery?
00:13:45Uh, mystery?
00:13:47Oh, no, it was a musical.
00:13:49Wasn't it?
00:13:50Yes, father.
00:13:51You know, one of those stories where the father locks his daughter in a boudoir, and the lover
00:13:54comes along with his ladder, and...
00:13:56Oh, now, now, Monique, let me tell it.
00:13:58And, you know, all the time, the father who was down below in the bushes.
00:14:04I didn't see anyone in the bushes.
00:14:07Oh, yes, you did.
00:14:10Didn't you?
00:14:11Then the lover climbs up the balcony, takes the girl in his arms and sings that song.
00:14:16Now, how does it go, Alfredo?
00:14:18Ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum.
00:14:24Just then, the father comes running out of the bushes.
00:14:27Oh, yes.
00:14:27...knocks over the ladder and leaves the two lovers hanging in mid-air.
00:14:41Oh, but you didn't come to the kiss yet, Alfredo.
00:14:45Well, of course, it always ends with a kiss.
00:14:50It was just an accident.
00:14:51Oh, now, sweetheart, how can you say anything so lovely was just an accident?
00:14:56I said it was an accident.
00:14:58And you think the fellow meant to kiss Monique?
00:15:01Well, of course, it was a matter of...
00:15:06...to kiss Monique.
00:15:07Yes.
00:15:09Did someone kiss Monique?
00:15:11Yes.
00:15:15Now, just one minute, please.
00:15:17Monique, am I your fiancé or am I not?
00:15:20Well, if you don't know, I don't know.
00:15:23Yes, but nobody explains to me nothing.
00:15:26I demand to know if you were kissed.
00:15:29I was kissed.
00:15:31By whom?
00:15:32I challenge him.
00:15:33You sit down and behave.
00:15:37Give me Edward.
00:15:38Now, listen to me, Monique.
00:15:40If you do not tell to me everything at once, I tell your father that I was not even at this cinema with you.
00:15:46Quiet, quiet.
00:15:47If it were left to you, the story would be all over Paris.
00:15:50Hello, Edward.
00:15:51Kill that story.
00:15:52Now, the paper in Paris will dare publish it if I say not to.
00:16:16Good morning, Alphonse.
00:16:19Good morning.
00:16:20Now, where's your crust of bread, Dodo?
00:16:21Alphonse is hungry.
00:16:22Yes, and so was I.
00:16:23Never mind about Alphonse.
00:16:24What about the beautiful girl?
00:16:25You know, you sat next to her in the movie and you...
00:16:26You kissed her and she stopped at her.
00:16:27Oh.
00:16:28You apologized.
00:16:29She was still angry, still angry.
00:16:30And then, then the crazy woman came in and she had to fear.
00:16:31Well, what did you say?
00:16:32What did you say?
00:16:33Listen, I've told you ten times already.
00:16:34Yes, but I want to improve your performance.
00:16:36Well, I said to her, I assure you, you are part of my life.
00:16:39If you know your artist, you are part of my life.
00:16:42It's part of your life.
00:16:43I'm great.
00:16:44How many people have done real things?
00:16:45Not everyone.
00:16:46This is a very beautiful girl.
00:16:48And I said to her, I'm lucky.
00:16:50How many people have taken up a long time?
00:16:51That's no way.
00:16:52How many people have taken up a long time on the day?
00:16:53It's been a long time.
00:16:54No.
00:16:55Well, I say to her, I assure you you would love your work.
00:16:58You are only making matters worse by, um...
00:17:01That was the wrong line.
00:17:03The line you should have used is, uh, Murray's line
00:17:05in the fourth act of The Winter Divorce.
00:17:07It says, fear not, fear, damsel.
00:17:09A kiss is but a paltry thing.
00:17:11Ah.
00:17:12Stop that.
00:17:13So you're not prompting at a theater now?
00:17:15Listen, I've prompted 446 plays,
00:17:17and know them all by heart.
00:17:18But you never take advantage of my vast intelligence.
00:17:21But, but this actually happened to me.
00:17:23The police took my name.
00:17:24The police took your name?
00:17:25Yes.
00:17:26And you gave your real name?
00:17:27Sure.
00:17:28Oh, dear.
00:17:29A thousand beautiful women in Paris
00:17:31never knew my name was Toto.
00:17:33A thousand?
00:17:34You don't think so, do you?
00:17:36What do they call you?
00:17:37They call me, uh, Poopoo.
00:17:39Poopoo?
00:17:40What?
00:17:41Poopoo?
00:17:42I even had to give the address of the theater.
00:17:44You gave the address of the theater where we, where we play?
00:17:46Well, you gave the address...
00:17:47Oh, my, what a smart boy.
00:17:48What a brilliant mind.
00:17:50That silly clock doesn't know him up yet.
00:17:53Listen, I didn't set it for getting up.
00:17:55This is time behind you at rehearsal.
00:17:56But to rehearsal?
00:17:57Oh, we've got to go to rehearsal.
00:17:58Come on.
00:17:59What is it?
00:18:00There was someone here to see you three times.
00:18:02Oh, those bell collectors.
00:18:03No, no, no.
00:18:04This was a lady.
00:18:05Oh, uh, uh, was she blonde or, uh, a brunette?
00:18:07I didn't see.
00:18:08I didn't see.
00:18:09She didn't get out of a taxi.
00:18:10Oh.
00:18:11Well, thanks just a second.
00:18:12Uh-uh.
00:18:13She said she would be back in a minute.
00:18:14Yeah.
00:18:15I know.
00:18:16Oh, it was her again, eh?
00:18:17Who?
00:18:18Oh, ho, ho, ho.
00:18:19You know.
00:18:20He, he, he, he, he, he, he.
00:18:21Oh, ho, ho, ho.
00:18:22Oh, ho, ho.
00:18:23Oh, ho, ho.
00:18:24Oh, ho.
00:18:25You know.
00:18:26Well, thanks as I said.
00:18:28She said she would be back in a minute.
00:18:30Yes, I know.
00:18:32Oh, it was her again, eh?
00:18:34Who?
00:18:36Oh, you know.
00:18:38Oh, ho, ho.
00:18:40Oh, ho, ho.
00:18:42Oh, ho, ho.
00:18:44Oh, ho, ho, ho.
00:18:46Oh, ho, ho, ho.
00:18:48Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me.
00:18:56Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho.
00:18:57To the dead in your banner, Terry!
00:19:05Argh.
00:19:06responding &聽
00:19:18To please the ladies is my obsession.
00:19:25To make them love me is my profession.
00:19:30Because my manner is so beguiling
00:19:36When I smile and wink
00:19:40My soul full lies
00:19:49And when they turned on the lights
00:19:51Morning girls.
00:19:52The love monster gave his name as Philippe Martin, actor, Savoy Theatre.
00:19:55What?
00:19:56So that's a kind of a friend you've got.
00:19:58Oh, uh-huh.
00:20:00This is tragic.
00:20:03All right, let's get on with the rehearsal.
00:20:05All on stage for the love train number.
00:20:08A train dispatcher, where's the train dispatcher?
00:20:10Martin, where's Martin?
00:20:12Toto, where's Martin?
00:20:13Am I my roommate's keeper? No.
00:20:15You're late.
00:20:16Yes, but I got a very good excuse.
00:20:17Never mind the excuse.
00:20:18All right, I'll save it for the next time.
00:20:20Get down there where you belong.
00:20:26Well, we've got to have a train dispatcher.
00:20:28Here, you. You take it.
00:20:30Me?
00:20:31Do I ring it?
00:20:32Well, you don't blow it.
00:20:34All aboard.
00:20:37All aboard.
00:20:38All aboard.
00:20:39All aboard.
00:20:40All aboard.
00:20:41The land of love.
00:20:44All aboard!
00:20:45All aboard!
00:20:46All aboard!
00:20:47All aboard!
00:20:48To the land of love!
00:20:49Well, well, well.
00:20:50Martin, are you going or coming from the land of love?
00:20:54Where have we been?
00:20:55All right, girls.
00:20:56Get back to your places.
00:20:57You can stare at him all you want to after the rehearsal.
00:20:58What's the matter with me?
00:20:59You're famous all over.
00:21:00Who's his favorite offer?
00:21:01Does he prefer blondes?
00:21:02Gentlemen, gentlemen.
00:21:03Now, there are thousands of Martin living in Paris.
00:21:04Are you sure this one is working for me?
00:21:05Absolutely.
00:21:06He gave the address to this theater.
00:21:07He hasn't attacked anyone around here yet, has he?
00:21:08Sort of a place to the...
00:21:09Has he, Denise?
00:21:10Not me, sir.
00:21:11It won't be long now.
00:21:12What?
00:21:13You mean you think he might...
00:21:14Any time, any place, anybody.
00:21:15Mr. Meyer, Mr. Meyer.
00:21:16Just a minute, please.
00:21:17All right.
00:21:18We'll try it again.
00:21:19All aboard!
00:21:20For the land of love!
00:21:21Love!
00:21:22Love!
00:21:23Love!
00:21:24Love!
00:21:25Love!
00:21:26Love!
00:21:27Love!
00:21:28Love!
00:21:29Love!
00:21:30Love!
00:21:31Love!
00:21:32Love!
00:21:33Love!
00:21:34Love!
00:21:35Love!
00:21:36Love!
00:21:37Love!
00:21:38Love!
00:21:39Love!
00:21:40Love!
00:21:41Love!
00:21:42Love!
00:21:43Love!
00:21:44Be quiet!
00:21:45Give me that bell.
00:21:46I'll show you now.
00:21:48Watch me.
00:21:49Like this.
00:21:50All aboard!
00:21:52All aboard!
00:21:54For the lands of love!
00:21:56Simply rotten.
00:21:57A lot of crazy talk about nothing.
00:22:00Will you stop reading your own publicity and get to work?
00:22:03Yes.
00:22:04Take a coat off.
00:22:06Keep it on.
00:22:09You're fired.
00:22:10You're fired.
00:22:11I can't have people like...
00:22:12Well, what are you?
00:22:13A fiend.
00:22:14A fiend?
00:22:15Well, I can't have any of you getting my theatre into distribute.
00:22:17You're fired.
00:22:18But please, let me tell you my side of it.
00:22:20No.
00:22:21After all, a kiss?
00:22:23After all, a kiss is but a poetry thing.
00:22:26Huh?
00:22:27Man's mad.
00:22:28Call the police.
00:22:29I'm going.
00:22:30I'm going.
00:22:31I'm going.
00:22:32You see, that was the wrong line, Toto.
00:22:34Goodbye, everybody.
00:22:35Goodbye.
00:22:36Goodbye.
00:22:37You can't take away my cast.
00:22:40You're fired.
00:22:41You're fired!
00:22:42You're fired.
00:22:43You're fired.
00:22:44Oh, that's what I said.
00:22:45Get out.
00:22:46Well, it's an old line, but it's always good for an exit.
00:22:49Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
00:22:58You?
00:22:59Philip?
00:23:00Oh, it's you.
00:23:01What do you want?
00:23:02I'm so upset about the whole thing.
00:23:04I can't eat.
00:23:05My husband is surely going to notice it.
00:23:07Yeah.
00:23:08This episode is also going to affect my appetite.
00:23:10I've been fired.
00:23:11Fired?
00:23:12Yes.
00:23:13Oh, but, Philip, you will be brave about it.
00:23:15You won't give me away.
00:23:16No, of course not.
00:23:17What do you think?
00:23:18I beg your pardon?
00:23:19Are you Philippe Martin?
00:23:20I have nothing to say.
00:23:21Perhaps not.
00:23:22Not here.
00:23:24Excuse me a minute.
00:23:25It's all right.
00:23:26I have nothing to say.
00:23:27Perhaps not.
00:23:28Not here.
00:23:35Excuse me a minute.
00:23:36Excuse me a minute, Yvonne.
00:23:37Please, don't mention my...
00:23:43This is Mr. LeBlanc.
00:23:44Sheriff's Office.
00:23:45Oh.
00:23:46What do you want?
00:23:47You.
00:23:48To appear for trial before the Court of Correction.
00:23:50On complaint to the Society for the Protection of Public Moral.
00:24:03What's going on in there?
00:24:04Has he attacked anyone yet?
00:24:05What did he look like?
00:24:06He's got horns?
00:24:11Detendant, that testimony against you is unanimous.
00:24:15Now, what have you to say for yourself?
00:24:17Well, Your Excellency, on the day in question it was raining.
00:24:22You understand.
00:24:24I object.
00:24:25Objection sustained.
00:24:26It was still raining.
00:24:27You see, there was nothing else to do, so we...
00:24:36I mean, I went to cinema with...
00:24:39You can't go on, because you sneaked into the theater alone.
00:24:43I didn't sneak.
00:24:44Or...
00:24:45In a way, I sneaked.
00:24:46But...
00:24:47His sneaking is a confession.
00:24:48I did not confess anything, Your Excellency.
00:24:49I object.
00:24:50You can't object.
00:24:51You're the defendant.
00:24:52Then I deny it.
00:24:53Then I deny it.
00:24:54Defendant, do you admit that under the cover of darkness, you attacked Mademoiselle Peleron?
00:24:58Your Excellency, a little kid is scarcely an attack.
00:24:59What would you call it?
00:25:00Well, we might call it, uh, a present.
00:25:05I object.
00:25:06Oh, no.
00:25:07If I can't object, he can't object.
00:25:08I object.
00:25:09I object.
00:25:10You can't object.
00:25:11You can't object.
00:25:12You're the defendant.
00:25:13Then I deny it.
00:25:14Defendant, do you admit that under the cover of darkness, you attack Mademoiselle Peleron?
00:25:16Your Excellency, a little kid is scarcely an attack.
00:25:19What would you call it?
00:25:21Well, we might call it, uh, a present.
00:25:25I object.
00:25:26If I can't object, he can't object.
00:25:28Objection sustained.
00:25:38Yoo-hoo.
00:25:39Yoo-hoo.
00:25:41Hoo-hoo-hoo.
00:25:42Well, say, I really haven't time for anything like this just now.
00:25:45I'm on my way to a trial.
00:25:47Yes, I know.
00:25:48You're Caleb's friend, Mr. Tutu.
00:25:49No.
00:25:50I've been chasing you for blocks.
00:25:51Oh, you have?
00:25:52Will you take him a letter?
00:25:53Well, I'm late now.
00:25:54I'll have to be seven hours preparing this basket of tainties for him to have in jail.
00:25:57You think they will send him to jail?
00:25:59Oh, sure.
00:26:00He hasn't got a chance.
00:26:01Oh, if he were only a murderer.
00:26:02Oh, but this letter's very important.
00:26:04Will you deliver it?
00:26:05It's a matter of life and death.
00:26:07Life and death?
00:26:08I'll deliver it dead or alive.
00:26:09Woo-hoo.
00:26:10Defendant.
00:26:11Defendant.
00:26:12Have you ever been sentenced before for a similar, uh...
00:26:16Well, your Excellency, I must confess I have kissed a few times in my life, but I've never been sent to jail for it.
00:26:25Very well.
00:26:26Now, in this particular instance, how did the plaintiff react?
00:26:32React?
00:26:33React?
00:26:34Oh, uh, you mean, uh, uh, during the act.
00:26:38She didn't react.
00:26:39I did.
00:26:40I did.
00:26:41I slapped him.
00:26:42Oh, no.
00:26:43That was afterwards.
00:26:44Afterwards.
00:26:45But while I was, you didn't budge.
00:26:49Because I was paralyzed with shock.
00:26:52Your Excellency, I do wish you let me object just this once.
00:26:56Because I really don't paralyze people when I kiss them.
00:27:00Silence.
00:27:01Silence.
00:27:02Silence in the court.
00:27:19Is this where my plan is being tried?
00:27:21Yes.
00:27:22Where do you think you're going?
00:27:23Here.
00:27:24Don't you see that?
00:27:25Public, not admitted.
00:27:26Oh, I see.
00:27:28Oh, oh.
00:27:29Hey, how about him?
00:27:30He has a card.
00:27:31Yes, but I have a letter.
00:27:32I have a letter.
00:27:33You must have a card.
00:27:34Bureau 346, fourth floor.
00:27:36Second corridor to your right, third door.
00:27:42That way.
00:27:43There is no one, the other door.
00:27:44There is no one.
00:27:45To be a card.
00:27:46There is no one.
00:27:49There is no one.
00:27:50He knows I will.
00:27:51You should have to leave it.
00:27:56He will you?
00:27:57Well, there is no one.
00:27:58I have no one.
00:28:00Yes.
00:28:01What any girl would feel?
00:28:03Terror?
00:28:04Well, Your Excellency, I...
00:28:07I can't say terror, exactly.
00:28:10Horror?
00:28:12No, I...
00:28:14I can't say horror.
00:28:16Excitement, perhaps?
00:28:18No, not quite excitement.
00:28:22Mixed emotions, then.
00:28:24Yes, that's it.
00:28:26Mixed emotions.
00:28:28Silence.
00:28:31Dependent, in the presence of the plaintiff,
00:28:34you will now show just how this thing happened.
00:28:37Oh, stop.
00:28:40You can demonstrate on the clerk of the court.
00:28:49That's asking a little too much.
00:28:51Hey, young man, where are you going?
00:28:53Arrest him or something.
00:28:58Why don't you knock?
00:29:01Oh, well, I'm in a hurry.
00:29:03The sign said knock.
00:29:04Well, I will next time.
00:29:05What do you want?
00:29:06I want admission to the courtroom, door number six.
00:29:08You have to get a phone.
00:29:09Fourth floor, corridor to the right.
00:29:10Up and stay away.
00:29:11And don't read over my shoulder.
00:29:13Oh.
00:29:15Fourth floor, corridor to the right.
00:29:18Don't read over my shoulder.
00:29:20Knock, knock, knock, knock.
00:29:22The only way we can get to the truth of this thing is to reenact the crime just as it occurred at the cinema.
00:29:31Sit down, mademoiselle.
00:29:34You have nothing to fear.
00:29:36You are in the fatherly protection of justice.
00:29:40Your Excellency.
00:29:41At the cinema, she was much nearer.
00:29:46Mademoiselle, if you please.
00:29:49Nearer.
00:29:50It's all right.
00:29:51Very well.
00:29:52Now, let's proceed.
00:30:04Before kissing the plaintiff, did you make any advances?
00:30:10He stole my program.
00:30:11Oh, oh, oh.
00:30:12Is that true?
00:30:14No, I didn't steal it.
00:30:16I merely borrowed it.
00:30:18And then what did you do?
00:30:21Oh, nothing.
00:30:22I just kissed her.
00:30:24That's all.
00:30:25Nothing?
00:30:26He called that nothing.
00:30:28Down.
00:30:29But how?
00:30:31How?
00:30:32Illustrate.
00:30:33Let's see.
00:30:35Oh.
00:30:36Don't you touch me.
00:30:38Well, she didn't say that in the cinema.
00:30:42Stop.
00:30:43I protest.
00:30:45I object.
00:30:46I mean, silence.
00:30:49Go away.
00:30:55Come in.
00:30:58Why did you knock?
00:30:59Well, the man up or downstairs, he told me to knock.
00:31:01In fact, he was very rude about it.
00:31:02Never mind.
00:31:03What do you want?
00:31:04What do I want?
00:31:05Oh, oh.
00:31:06My very best friend, Martin.
00:31:08He's on trial for his life or death.
00:31:10I must have a chance to see him at door number three.
00:31:12You'll have to get a tax stamp.
00:31:13First floor in the corner by the entrance.
00:31:15Oh.
00:31:16You haven't got one here, have you?
00:31:17No!
00:31:18No.
00:31:19My plan, the court is confused.
00:31:26It still does not understand the when of the kiss, the where of the kiss, or the why of the kiss.
00:31:33Your Excellency, if I could only explain.
00:31:38I see.
00:31:39You mean the temptation was irresistible.
00:31:43Yes.
00:31:44That's it.
00:31:46Your Excellency, you know what love is, don't you?
00:31:52Oh.
00:31:53Don't ask the court question.
00:31:56Well, it's sort of like being struck by lightning, isn't it?
00:31:59I protest.
00:32:00Against lightning?
00:32:01Silence!
00:32:02Now, go on with your lightning.
00:32:03Go on.
00:32:04Go on.
00:32:05Well, it happened like this.
00:32:07I was seated next to Mademoiselle.
00:32:10Oh.
00:32:11The fragrance of her perfume.
00:32:13Such a subtle perfume, Your Excellency.
00:32:16Charming.
00:32:18Then I'm going to go to the house.
00:32:21I'm going to go to the house.
00:32:23I'm going to go to the house.
00:32:24I'm going to go to the house.
00:32:25Then I was looking at Mademoiselle's ear.
00:32:30Oh, Your Excellency, I do wish the court would come down and take a look at that sweet little ear.
00:32:38The bench can see the sweet little ear from here.
00:32:41Proceed.
00:32:42Well, Your Excellency, that ear was saying things to me.
00:32:47The people on the screen were embracing each other.
00:32:52There was soft music.
00:32:53A love song.
00:32:54It went like this.
00:32:55And then, Your Excellency, I offered up a kiss as my tribute to beauty.
00:33:13The defendant convicts himself.
00:33:14In weaving his subtle net, he employed all the insidious devices known to his perfidious profession.
00:33:30A love song.
00:33:31A love song.
00:33:32A rainy afternoon.
00:33:33Low lights.
00:33:34And then, at the psychological moment, he struck.
00:33:35Bravo!
00:33:36Bravo!
00:33:37Oh, poor Philippe.
00:33:38Philippe, Philippe.
00:33:39Philippe could only remember the defendant's oration from the Merchant of Venice.
00:33:43Or Madame X.
00:33:44Madame X.
00:33:45Madame X.
00:33:46Madame X would be good too.
00:33:47But he won't.
00:33:48He won't.
00:33:49Madame, before I pass sentence, have you anything further to say?
00:33:52Philippe could only remember the defendant's oration from the Merchant of Venice, or Madame X, Madame X, Madame X would be good, too.
00:33:59But he won't, he won't.
00:34:04Madame, before I pass sentence, have you anything further to say?
00:34:10Only this, that if I'm convicted for kissing a girl, a beautiful girl, mind you,
00:34:17that it will be the first, the first time since the dates of Charlemagne that a Frenchman has been convicted for so charming an offense.
00:34:28Down through the centuries, we have become known as the most gallant of nations.
00:34:32And now, with one gesture, this court will destroy that noble and inalienable heritage.
00:34:38The quality of mercy is not strained.
00:34:43It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven, as it droppeth upon us that rainy afternoon.
00:34:51And so, I kissed this beautiful girl.
00:34:56No true Frenchman should question why or wherefore.
00:34:59I only ask the court to study her loveliness.
00:35:04And there, I rest my case.
00:35:08Sir, Madame, this is not all strictly legal because making allowances for the dear little ear,
00:35:21we find you guilty of merely creating a disturbance in public
00:35:25and inflict a minimum penalty of three days in jail.
00:35:30Three days?
00:35:32In three days, this monster will be free to repeat his crime.
00:35:37Three days in jail, or 150 francs and costs.
00:35:44Oh, I'll pay the fine.
00:35:46150 francs plus city taxes, plus special taxes, plus government taxes, plus registration fees.
00:35:52Total, 1,000 francs, 80-something.
00:35:57Will you please give me the address of that jail?
00:35:59Do I knock or do I not knock?
00:36:13Knock.
00:36:14Knock?
00:36:15Knock, knock.
00:36:16Knock, knock.
00:36:17Knock, knock.
00:36:20What do you want?
00:36:21Well, I have here a permit.
00:36:22I have four signatures.
00:36:23I have a stamp.
00:36:24Now I want a card.
00:36:26Are you a friend's citizen?
00:36:27Yes.
00:36:28Yes.
00:36:29What did your mother and father die of?
00:36:31They didn't.
00:36:32I'll have to look up your record.
00:36:34My record?
00:36:35Yes, sir.
00:36:36We have on file here a complete life's history of every citizen.
00:36:39Well, I'll be back after a while.
00:36:40Sit down.
00:36:41I'll be back after a while.
00:37:05I'd like to pay the fine in the Martin case, please.
00:37:25Martin, Martin, Martin, Martin,
00:37:28him, him, him, him, him, him, him.
00:37:33Still?
00:37:35I've got them. I've got them. Now, now I can go in.
00:37:48Oh, you didn't need a card to go into the trial.
00:37:51What? Why, you told me I had.
00:37:53To go into the reserve door, yes.
00:37:55Oh, yes, yes.
00:37:56This entrance is public.
00:37:58Oh, this is public. Oh, you know, don't you?
00:38:00Oh, yes, yes. Now I know.
00:38:02Where are you going?
00:38:03I'm going into the trial.
00:38:05The trial is over.
00:38:09Oh, then I don't need this anymore.
00:38:11No.
00:38:11The trial is over.
00:38:12Yeah.
00:38:13Oh, yeah. The trial is over.
00:38:17What are they doing to my tent?
00:38:18They put him in jail.
00:38:20What?
00:38:21He couldn't pay his fine.
00:38:22Oh.
00:38:25Couldn't pay his fine, huh?
00:38:26Oh, couldn't pay his fine.
00:38:35Where are they?
00:38:41Where are they?
00:38:45Where, where, where are they?
00:38:46You know, they, you know, they, you know, they, you know, they, you know, they, oh, the cell.
00:39:00The cell, you go upstairs, the second corridor, don't tell me, I'll find it better if you don't tell me.
00:39:06Are you sure he'll be released immediately?
00:39:09Immediately?
00:39:10Shut the wicket.
00:39:12Are you sure he'll be released immediately?
00:39:14Immediately?
00:39:15Shut the wicket.
00:39:24This way.
00:39:24Hey.
00:39:30Hey.
00:39:33That's fine.
00:39:46Just a minute, just a minute, just a minute.
00:39:48Are you 666-3636?
00:39:50What?
00:39:51Martin, Martin.
00:39:52Yes, Martin.
00:39:53There's an order for his release.
00:39:55Release?
00:39:56His fine was paid.
00:39:57But who paid it?
00:39:59How can I know?
00:40:00Mademoiselle Penderon.
00:40:01No!
00:40:03Oh, uh, I am free.
00:40:05Oh, good luck.
00:40:08Mademoiselle, mademoiselle, you've made me very happy and grateful.
00:40:13Will you leave me alone, or shall I call for the police?
00:40:15Oh, uh, do you want to have to pay another fine for me?
00:40:17No, it wasn't for you.
00:40:19No, then why did you pay it?
00:40:20Well, do you suppose I want all this ridiculous publicity to go on?
00:40:24The monster in jail.
00:40:25The monster escapes.
00:40:27The monster released.
00:40:29Monster.
00:40:30Oh, so you don't think I am one, huh?
00:40:32I don't care what you are.
00:40:34I just don't have anything more to do with you, that's all.
00:40:36A man who goes around kissing strangers.
00:40:39Oh, but we are no strangers any longer.
00:40:41No.
00:40:43Oh, I see, having paid a thousand francs for one kiss, you might hesitate about a second.
00:40:48Well, I'm sure you'll make a discount for an old customer.
00:40:51I will.
00:40:52Oh, mademoiselle, one minute, please.
00:40:53Listen, suppose we're seen.
00:40:54Don't you realize we're standing on a public staircase?
00:40:56We might go to the cinema.
00:40:57Mademoiselle, mademoiselle, I don't care who sees us or what they say,
00:41:00but I won't let you go until you permit me to repay you.
00:41:04You won't?
00:41:05No, I won't.
00:41:07All right.
00:41:08Pay me, then.
00:41:10Well, I'm afraid at the moment, of course, I...
00:41:12Please, please.
00:41:13Oh, Toto.
00:41:13Mademoiselle.
00:41:15Toto, give me a thousand francs.
00:41:16A thousand francs?
00:41:17Then give me a line.
00:41:18Oh, no matter what you've done to me.
00:41:20No matter what you've done to me.
00:41:21I love you.
00:41:23No, I hate you.
00:41:24No, I forgive you.
00:41:26I forgive you.
00:41:30Tony.
00:41:35Tony.
00:41:37Yes?
00:41:38What are you doing?
00:42:01Look here.
00:42:02We're going to have some fun.
00:42:06Him?
00:42:07Her?
00:42:08Ah, the monster attacks again, eh?
00:42:18All seats for the opening night.
00:42:20Are you sure my family will be in the show?
00:42:22Yes, yes, yes, yes.
00:42:26Wait for Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday.
00:42:28And in the front row, if you have.
00:42:37What is this?
00:42:38What are they doing down there, all those people?
00:42:39Do you know?
00:42:40They're buying tickets to see him out of hand.
00:42:42360 mail applications received this morning.
00:42:45You see the monster?
00:42:46I wish we had a page full of monsters like him.
00:42:48Where is he?
00:42:49You fired him?
00:42:50Yes.
00:42:50I fired him, and everybody in Paris is paying money to see him.
00:42:54That's the trouble with this, dear.
00:42:55You just tell somebody they'll file, and the first thing you know, they believe it.
00:42:59By the way, Toto, isn't you an uncle who is rich?
00:43:03Oh, very rich, very rich.
00:43:05And very sick.
00:43:06Oh, well, he's out of danger now.
00:43:07Oh, that's bad.
00:43:08Oh, he's out of danger?
00:43:10Yes, yes.
00:43:10Then what about him loaning you some...
00:43:12Oh, no, say not.
00:43:13Oh, no, no, never.
00:43:15Why, did he cut you out of his work?
00:43:16He cut me out of his life.
00:43:18Why?
00:43:19Well, because I look like him.
00:43:21I don't want to go around spending his money.
00:43:22People might think I'm him, and I don't want people to think I'm him because I don't want to look like him.
00:43:25And everybody says we look like each other.
00:43:26Now, I don't want to look like him.
00:43:28But what does he look like?
00:43:29He looks like a dog-faced boy.
00:43:30Hey, pardon me, just a moment.
00:43:32After all, I'm his nephew, you know, see?
00:43:33Oh, I don't want to look like him, I don't want to look like him.
00:44:03Now, chicken!
00:44:04Eh?
00:44:05Now, will you go?
00:44:06No, you're going to stay here and have a fine dinner for them when they get back.
00:44:09I do all the cooking at home, you know.
00:44:11What shall I say?
00:44:13I'll prompt you.
00:44:18I think I'll make some nice onion dressing.
00:44:21If you come to collect money from them, you...
00:44:24Not at all, my dear.
00:44:25I've come to give them money.
00:44:30Oh, well, how are you?
00:44:31Well, it was a great pleasure.
00:44:32It was a great pleasure.
00:44:33And an honor.
00:44:34And an honor.
00:44:34And calls for a celebration.
00:44:35Calls for a celebration.
00:44:36Get some wine.
00:44:37Get some wine.
00:44:37Oh, a little one.
00:44:39Turn down to the corner and get us a bottle of wine.
00:44:41Get two bottles.
00:44:41Oh, get two bottles.
00:44:42And don't come back.
00:44:48Oh, yeah, and a surprise.
00:44:50Oh, yeah, surprise.
00:44:50Surprise.
00:44:51Surprise.
00:44:52Surprise to me, too.
00:44:53What were you doing back there?
00:44:54Oh, it's a little game we play called Seat and Go Hide.
00:44:56He hides and I find him, and I hide and he finds me.
00:44:58It's a game we play when we're not working.
00:45:01You are working, you know, both of you.
00:45:03Really?
00:45:03Really?
00:45:04Really.
00:45:04Now, you give me the yogurt that I eat and you chop up those onions.
00:45:06Very fine.
00:45:08Do you realize what a great injustice you've done to me?
00:45:12Do you realize what a great injustice you've done to me?
00:45:15To both of you?
00:45:16Yes, both of us.
00:45:20Turn your head a little that way, please.
00:45:22The more to the right, I want to look at your profile.
00:45:23Yeah, that's it.
00:45:24Is he going to ring the bell with his profile?
00:45:26I thought so.
00:45:27There is something there.
00:45:29Only 10 days ago, I was saying that that Marta has something.
00:45:32I think he has the mumps or the bulges.
00:45:35Is it contagious?
00:45:36Is it contagious?
00:45:37Now, what I mean is you have a real talent.
00:45:39Oh, that is why you fired me.
00:45:42Can't you take a joke?
00:45:44What the?
00:45:45You have a great future in front of you.
00:45:47I've had the whole play rearranged for you.
00:45:49I've even composed a song for you myself.
00:45:51Ah, it's about that rainy afternoon affair, you know, you rascal, you.
00:45:56Ah, you see, and you are making fun of my voice.
00:45:59You've got a marvelous voice, isn't he?
00:46:01Has he?
00:46:01I, I, I, I...
00:46:03Oh, so, so you heard me sing.
00:46:04No, but I never, never mistake a face.
00:46:06Oh, wait a minute.
00:46:07Come on.
00:46:09Of salt, salt, salt.
00:46:16There's a little matter of salary.
00:46:18Oh, there's a little matter of salary.
00:46:20We mustn't forget the salary.
00:46:23You like a lot of it?
00:46:24Oh, yes, a lot.
00:46:26Here, cut that up.
00:46:26Ah.
00:46:27One, two, three.
00:46:29It's not enough.
00:46:31Four, five, six.
00:46:34Make it a thousand.
00:46:35Oh, then it's a deal.
00:46:36What are you two talking about?
00:46:37What are you talking about?
00:46:39I'm talking about salt.
00:46:40Oh, we are talking about...
00:46:41Francs.
00:46:42You mean you want a thousand francs?
00:46:43Yes.
00:46:44Oh!
00:46:45Oh!
00:46:45Oh!
00:46:50So you want a thousand francs?
00:46:54A week?
00:46:55In advance.
00:46:56And you sure have it.
00:46:57Oh!
00:46:57You took my advice and made yourself popular, and I'm perfectly willing to pay, my boy.
00:47:01Now put the rest of the stuff in the dress.
00:47:02Here, now.
00:47:05You mean to say he came right up to you and grabbed your arm?
00:47:08What did you do?
00:47:09Slap his face?
00:47:10Well, what could I do?
00:47:11How did he get out of jail?
00:47:13Uh, how?
00:47:16Yes, how?
00:47:19You wouldn't know, would you?
00:47:21Are you insinuating?
00:47:22Yes.
00:47:24Well, uh...
00:47:26You paid his fine.
00:47:28What if I did?
00:47:30Wouldn't you?
00:47:31Gladly.
00:47:33But that's no reason he should chase you down the stairs, then.
00:47:36He doesn't need a reason for anything.
00:47:39He just does things.
00:47:43Who is it?
00:47:45Who is calling?
00:47:47It's personal.
00:47:48It's personal!
00:47:49It's personal.
00:47:53Hello?
00:47:55Yes, this is Mademoiselle Pellerin speaking.
00:47:57Who is it?
00:48:00Who?
00:48:02Who is it?
00:48:04This is Alfredo.
00:48:07Well, of all the colossal impudence calling me like this.
00:48:10I know, Mademoiselle, but this is terribly important.
00:48:12Well, if you think I'm going to stand here all afternoon and talk to somebody who has...
00:48:15Who is a...
00:48:16Oh, she cut me off.
00:48:20Well, call her again.
00:48:21Hello?
00:48:22Who is it?
00:48:22Oh, indeed.
00:48:23Well, quickly then.
00:48:23I can't have you following me every minute.
00:48:27What do you want?
00:48:28I must see you.
00:48:29I want to pay you back a thousand francs.
00:48:30Settle for five hundred.
00:48:31This afternoon?
00:48:32Well, that's impossible.
00:48:33I'll go to the house.
00:48:34I'll go to the house.
00:48:35I'll go to the house.
00:48:36I'll go to the house.
00:48:37I'll go to the house.
00:48:38I'll go to the house.
00:48:39And I'll go to the house.
00:48:40Alfredo?
00:48:41Well, I'll go to the house.
00:48:42Alfredo.
00:48:43Well, I'll go to the house.
00:48:44I'll go to the house.
00:48:45He's a good guy.
00:48:46Oh, look.
00:48:47I'll go to the house.
00:48:48It's a good guy.
00:48:49He's a good guy.
00:48:50Look, I want to go to the house.
00:48:51He's a good guy.
00:48:52I can't have you following me every minute.
00:48:54What do you want?
00:48:56I must see you.
00:48:58I want to pay you back a thousand francs.
00:49:00Settle for five hundred.
00:49:02Oh!
00:49:32Oh!
00:50:02Mademoiselle!
00:50:10Mademoiselle!
00:50:14Oh!
00:50:18Mademoiselle, I... I'm sorry you fell.
00:50:21You're not me dog.
00:50:22Did you bump your head?
00:50:25Oh, look!
00:50:27That's perfect, Mademoiselle.
00:50:32It's the whiskers that do it.
00:50:34I'm sure with whiskers like that and your help,
00:50:37I could learn to escape very quickly.
00:50:39Will you go and let me get up?
00:50:54Well, come on. I can't let you stay here.
00:50:56You're in everybody's way.
00:50:57Oh, be careful.
00:50:58You're...
00:50:59You're always helping me out.
00:51:01I...
00:51:02I suppose I'll be thanking you the rest of my life.
00:51:04Well, I hope you don't consider this a permanent arrangement.
00:51:06Ready?
00:51:07It's a very nice arrangement.
00:51:08Come on.
00:51:14You know...
00:51:15Oh!
00:51:16You know, I don't often come here like this without my chaperone.
00:51:18Except today.
00:51:19Well, she just had to have something else she wanted to do.
00:51:21We'll chill and as we tremble
00:51:25The stars will all assemble
00:51:29A horoscope of bliss
00:51:33Ninety-nine, the first speaker.
00:51:35match
00:51:37Deeper than the blue
00:51:40Will be the love I pledge to you
00:51:47In our secret rendezvous
00:51:51Hey!
00:52:10It's five o'clock. I really must be going.
00:52:11Oh, I forgot I wanted to pay back a thousand francs.
00:52:14Well, then that ends the matter.
00:52:16I won't see you again.
00:52:18Oh, I'm afraid I couldn't pay back a thousand francs at one time.
00:52:21You see, I thought you would permit me to pay back a little every day, say, a hundred francs.
00:52:28Then that would take ten days.
00:52:48Oh, well, I think we're getting along very well together.
00:52:52That's what I'm thinking.
00:52:57Ladies and gentlemen, I wish to announce an exhibition by mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:06I wish to announce an exhibition by mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:09Queen of the Irish.
00:53:11Will everyone please clear the ice?
00:53:15Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:17Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:19Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:21Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:23Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:25Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:39Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:40Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:41Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:42Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:43Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:44Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:45Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:46Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:47Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:48Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:49Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:50Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:51Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:52Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:53Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:54Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:55Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:56Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:57Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:58Mademoiselle Agner.
00:53:59Mademoiselle Agner.
00:54:00Mademoiselle Agner.
00:54:01Mademoiselle Agner.
00:54:02Mademoiselle Agner.
00:54:03Oh, get it, boys. This is very fine publicity, Mr. Monster.
00:54:07Thank you, sir.
00:54:10I tell you, I won't have it.
00:54:12You're involving my family and exploiting my daughter.
00:54:14That little lily.
00:54:15It's an ill wind, my dear Pelleron,
00:54:17that doesn't ruffle the feathers of the rooster
00:54:19and settle the feathers of the goose.
00:54:21Goose? That little lamb.
00:54:23You can't use my daughter for your cheap publicity.
00:54:25But what a daughter. My compliments to you, my dear, sir.
00:54:28And what publicity. My gratitude to your daughter.
00:54:31The little lily lamb.
00:54:33Don't forget that I'm not in the newspaper business for nothing.
00:54:35I'll start a scandal. It'll ruin your theater.
00:54:37Another scandal? What cooperation?
00:54:40More good news, huh?
00:54:43Send complimentary tickets for the opening night to Mr. Pelleron
00:54:46and get me the news for dogma. I'll be on the stage.
00:54:50Here, Mr. Pelleron.
00:54:52There is something going on about here that I do not know about.
00:54:56Something you do not know about,
00:54:58but something Monique does know about
00:55:00and something I'm going to find something out about.
00:55:03I see. In other words, something.
00:55:05Monique, Paris has gone mad.
00:55:08Paris has always been mad.
00:55:09I am mad too.
00:55:10Yeah, you've always been mad.
00:55:12Yes. And now I'm mad.
00:55:15Yes, you should be mad too.
00:55:17When every girl on every street goes about singing that foolish song
00:55:20and expecting something wonderful to happen to her.
00:55:23That song, yes.
00:55:25See, even you are singing it.
00:55:41Well, so are you.
00:55:42Me?
00:55:43Well, anyway, it's a good song and I like it.
00:55:45And so do I.
00:55:47Monique!
00:55:48Well, where are you going?
00:56:02Skating.
00:56:03What again?
00:56:04Well, it's a marvelous exercise.
00:56:05You know I never felt better in my life.
00:56:07You see, she's proud of you.
00:56:08It makes her feel good.
00:56:09What on earth are you talking about?
00:56:10This.
00:56:15What a picture.
00:56:17It's good of Martin, though, don't you think?
00:56:20Well, I...
00:56:22I look simply frightful, though.
00:56:25Exactly.
00:56:26Frightful.
00:56:27And where were you while this was going on?
00:56:30Me?
00:56:31Well, Father, I don't need a guardian every afternoon.
00:56:33No, you need a regiment.
00:56:34Well, Father, can I prevent him skating if he wants to?
00:56:38I can, that Mephisto.
00:56:40I'll prevent his skating.
00:56:41I'll prevent his kissing.
00:56:42I'll prevent his living.
00:56:43That's enough.
00:56:44You'll do nothing of the kind.
00:56:45You go on back to your rooms.
00:56:46Both you girls.
00:56:47Back to your rooms.
00:56:48Go on.
00:56:49From now on, I'll handle this matter myself.
00:56:50Myself.
00:56:51Oh, quiet!
00:56:52Quiet!
00:56:53Quiet!
00:56:54It's an outrage.
00:56:55To keep you waiting like this.
00:56:56He's an hour late for dress rehearsal.
00:56:57And what is he, anyway?
00:56:58In English?
00:56:59Yes.
00:57:00Think that I, who made him, created him.
00:57:01He's an outrage.
00:57:02To keep you waiting like this.
00:57:03He's an hour late for dress rehearsal.
00:57:04And what is he, anyway?
00:57:05In English?
00:57:06Yes.
00:57:07I, who made him, created him.
00:57:08Lifted him up.
00:57:09From a mere nobody.
00:57:10To a great star.
00:57:11And...
00:57:12And overnight.
00:57:13Facing every newspaper.
00:57:15His name in lights.
00:57:16It was I.
00:57:17I.
00:57:18So it was you.
00:57:19You're the fellow who kissed the girl in the cinema, huh?
00:57:20Yes.
00:57:21No.
00:57:22That reminded me to remind Margot to do it again.
00:57:24I'm a respectable woman, I tell you I am.
00:57:37I admit it.
00:57:38In fact, I'm in favor of it.
00:57:42Oh, but I can't stand this concealment.
00:57:45And, oh God.
00:57:46Can't you, Philip?
00:57:47No.
00:57:48Either we must face your husband, or we must part.
00:57:52Philip, must we really?
00:57:55What is there left to do?
00:57:58Yes.
00:57:59Yes.
00:58:00I understand.
00:58:01But how will I ever forgive myself for breaking your heart?
00:58:06Oh, that's...
00:58:07Oh, that's all right, little woman.
00:58:19Is that him?
00:58:20Yes.
00:58:21Who's the girl?
00:58:22It doesn't make any difference.
00:58:23It's a girl.
00:58:24Goodbye.
00:58:25Yes.
00:58:26I know how you are suffering, Philip.
00:58:29You are suffering, aren't you?
00:58:31What?
00:58:32Why?
00:58:33Naturally.
00:58:34Well, if we are saying goodbye, you may kiss me for the last time.
00:58:41You mean, for the first time?
00:58:44Morning.
00:58:45Ah, there you are.
00:58:46Ah, good morning.
00:58:47Ah, good morning.
00:58:48Did you have a good rest?
00:58:49Yes, thank you.
00:58:50I trust this dress will be fine.
00:58:51Oh, I'm sorry.
00:58:52I'm sorry.
00:58:53I'm sorry.
00:58:54I'm sorry.
00:58:55I'm sorry.
00:58:56I'm sorry.
00:58:57I'm sorry.
00:58:58I'm sorry.
00:58:59I'm sorry.
00:59:00I'm sorry.
00:59:01I'm sorry.
00:59:02I'm sorry.
00:59:03You know?
00:59:04I trust this dress rehearsal is not going to be too much of a strain for you.
00:59:06Oh, not at all.
00:59:07Oh, thank you.
00:59:08Lovely.
00:59:09Of course, I thought it was going to be different.
00:59:10But look at this.
00:59:11We're just as unready as any company at a dress rehearsal.
00:59:13Back to your places.
00:59:14Come on.
00:59:15Move.
00:59:16Hurry.
00:59:17You move like...
00:59:18Snails.
00:59:19Snails.
00:59:20Oh, shut up.
00:59:21I know my lines.
00:59:22Okay.
00:59:23I just want you to run over the new lyrics to the song.
00:59:24Get some oomph into it, you know.
00:59:25You know.
00:59:26The rain was dripping.
00:59:27I was slipping.
00:59:28And so I thought to see a movie would be a reference.
00:59:29Yes, that's fine.
00:59:30Splendid excellent.
00:59:31But more warmth, my dear boy.
00:59:32More oomph.
00:59:33Well, apparently I haven't too much oomph.
00:59:34Now, I'm going to show you how to do it.
00:59:35I'm going to play you.
00:59:36Oh, that's a bad piece of casting.
00:59:37Well, I'll be you for the time being.
00:59:38Now, I'm going to sing the song that all Paris is waiting to hear.
00:59:39And you must imagine me coming down the aisle and taking my seat, just as you did in the
00:59:41cinema of the famous Kiss.
00:59:42And you will sit next to Clara.
00:59:43Clara?
00:59:44Clara?
00:59:45Clara?
00:59:46Yes.
00:59:47Clara is going to play the Penelon girl, you see?
00:59:48Another bad piece of casting.
00:59:49Oh, my dear boy, more oomph.
00:59:50Well, apparently I haven't too much oomph.
00:59:51Now, I'm going to show you how to do it.
00:59:52I'm going to show you how to do it.
00:59:53I'm going to play you.
00:59:54Oh, that's a bad piece of casting.
00:59:55Well, I'll be you for the time being.
00:59:56Now, I'm going to sing the song that all Paris is waiting to hear.
00:59:57I'll be you for the time being.
00:59:58I'm going to be taking my seat, just as you did in the cinema of the famous Kiss.
01:00:00And you will sit next to Clara.
01:00:01Clara?
01:00:02Clara?
01:00:03Yes.
01:00:04Clara is going to play the Penelon girl, you see?
01:00:06Another bad piece of casting.
01:00:08How do you know?
01:00:09You've never kissed me.
01:00:10Well, I did.
01:00:11Quiet, Poo Poo.
01:00:13No, no.
01:00:14Come, come, come, come, come.
01:00:16Now, this is how it must be sung.
01:00:18The mask of comedy concealing the throbbing heart of romance.
01:00:23You follow me.
01:00:24It'll be quite easy.
01:00:25My key, please.
01:00:26Now, the first part's unimportant, you see, because everybody just tells the story,
01:00:30and everybody knows the story.
01:00:31So, all right, you know.
01:00:34The rain was dripping, and I was slipping,
01:00:37and so I thought to see a movie would be ripping.
01:00:39It was so dark there, so nice to park there,
01:00:41especially on that rainy afternoon.
01:00:43A lovely stranger sat there beside me,
01:00:47and there was danger but no conscience there to guide me.
01:00:51I squeezed her hand then, it was so grand then.
01:00:55On that lucky rain, rain, rainy afternoon.
01:00:59Upon the screen there was a scene of Lance Supreme,
01:01:01but in between I caught a glimpse of loveliness divine
01:01:07that stole away this heart of mine.
01:01:10Believe me, mister, who could resist her?
01:01:14Before I knew what I was doing, I had kissed her.
01:01:18There's another way to do that.
01:01:22You know, you could kiss her before you sing the words kiss her.
01:01:25We'll try that again.
01:01:26Before I knew what I was doing, I had kissed her.
01:01:31Oh, that's right?
01:01:32Oh, yeah.
01:01:33The story's simple, a saucy dimple,
01:01:35brought us together on that rainy afternoon.
01:01:37You did that very well, my darling.
01:01:53A saucy dimple, brought us together on that rainy afternoon.
01:02:05You did that very well, Martijn, very well.
01:02:08Oh, uh, shall I try it again?
01:02:11Okay, if you like, yeah.
01:02:12All right, come on, Clara.
01:02:13No, no, no, no.
01:02:14Tara's busy.
01:02:15Lulu, you come and understand the Clara of Mr. Martijn, will you?
01:02:18Oh.
01:02:19How long have you been employed in my theater, hmm?
01:02:23Yes, sir.
01:02:24You're the fellow I'm looking for.
01:02:25How do you do?
01:02:26Is it about Monique?
01:02:27Oh, you call her Monique, do you?
01:02:28I can't explain that.
01:02:29Yes, well, I'm not here for an explanation.
01:02:30This friendship, if that's what you call it, Masise.
01:02:32Oh.
01:02:33I'm sorry to hear that.
01:02:34You see, I am deeply indebted to your daughter.
01:02:36But as much as I would like it to be otherwise, our friendship is nothing but a business arrangement.
01:02:40Business arrangement?
01:02:41Yes, sir.
01:02:42I'm sorry to hear that.
01:02:43You see, I am deeply indebted to your daughter.
01:02:46But as much as I would like it to be otherwise, our friendship is nothing but a business arrangement.
01:02:52Business?
01:02:53Yes.
01:02:54You see, after she paid my fine and got me out of jail, the least I could do was to pay her
01:02:59back.
01:03:00Monique paid your fine?
01:03:01Yes.
01:03:02Why, if I...
01:03:03Oh.
01:03:04Now, look here, Monique.
01:03:05I want to hear more about this.
01:03:06Why did she pay your fine?
01:03:07You see, she realized that as long as I was in jail, the whole incident would be headlined
01:03:09in the papers.
01:03:10So, to avoid any more publicity, she paid my fine.
01:03:11I'm only interested in there being no more scandal.
01:03:12And as you are a gentleman that respects Monique.
01:03:13Respects?
01:03:14Monsieur Poirot, and there's nothing in the world I wouldn't...
01:03:25As long as I was in jail, the whole incident would be headlined in the papers.
01:03:29So, to avoid any more publicity, she paid my fine.
01:03:32I'm only interested in there being no more scandals.
01:03:34And as you are a gentleman that respects Monique...
01:03:37Respects?
01:03:38Monsieur Peller, and there's nothing in the world I wouldn't...
01:03:40Well, then, for Monique's sake, I hope you will use discretion, good judgment, and good taste.
01:03:46And no more scandals.
01:03:49For Monique's sake.
01:03:51Thank you, Martin.
01:03:54Uh, good-bye, Martin.
01:04:01Thank you, Martin.
01:04:06Thank you, Gareth.
01:04:13Monique!
01:04:14Our freedom!
01:04:15I won't be followed about like this if you wanted something you could have waited.
01:04:17Yes, but look!
01:04:19Well, of all the...
01:04:20You are mad at him!
01:04:21Oh, I'm delighted!
01:04:22I'll show him.
01:04:23Oh, precious!
01:04:24Monique!
01:04:25Monique!
01:04:26Oh!
01:04:27Monique, wait!
01:04:28Oh, you, you, kissing women in taxi cabs!
01:04:29Who?
01:04:30Just so that you can get your pictures in the paper again.
01:04:31What do you do?
01:04:32Hire photographers to follow you?
01:04:33Oh, that was the girl I thought I was kissing in the cinema.
01:04:35But I was just saying goodbye to her forever so that you and I could...
01:04:38Oh, let me go.
01:04:39Look!
01:04:40The monster!
01:04:41Oh, no, no, not me.
01:04:42He, him.
01:04:43Come along.
01:04:44Here, come along.
01:04:45What do you mean?
01:04:46Here, you!
01:04:47There's your monster arrest.
01:04:48Here, you!
01:04:49Here, you!
01:04:50There's your monster arrest.
01:04:51Here, him or a writer, so his pictures in your papers.
01:04:52What have I done?
01:04:53Oh, tell me.
01:04:54I'll show you.
01:04:55I'll show you.
01:04:56I'll show you.
01:04:57Oh, that was the girl I thought I was kissing in the cinema.
01:04:59But I was just saying goodbye to her forever so that you and I could...
01:05:01Oh, let me go.
01:05:02Look!
01:05:03The monster!
01:05:04Oh, no, no, not me.
01:05:05He, him.
01:05:06Come along.
01:05:07Come along.
01:05:08What do you mean?
01:05:09Here, you.
01:05:10There's your monster arrest.
01:05:11Here.
01:05:12What have I done?
01:05:13Oh, just a minute, please.
01:05:15Are you going to let them do this to me?
01:05:23No violence now.
01:05:36Dear, oh, dear, I'm ruined.
01:05:37I have to give all those people their money back.
01:05:40If you still have one to give them back.
01:05:41If I still had it here, sir.
01:05:42Do you realize that the curtain goes up in a few hours?
01:05:44Yes.
01:05:45And you haven't got a leading man?
01:05:46Ah, yes, you have.
01:05:48I'm in perfect voice.
01:05:50I have 15 years of experience behind me.
01:05:53Behind you?
01:05:54Have you ever kissed a girl in the cinema?
01:05:56I've ever kissed one?
01:05:57Just one?
01:05:58One?
01:05:59One?
01:06:00I have it.
01:06:01Here is understudy.
01:06:02You've been understudy behind the bars.
01:06:03Bah!
01:06:04I am no convict.
01:06:05And you're no singer.
01:06:06But you're a prompter.
01:06:07It's your job to think things up.
01:06:09Yeah?
01:06:10We'll take a taxi and you'll think.
01:06:11I think we're all going to jail.
01:06:12That's what I'd do.
01:06:13Monsieur Perron.
01:06:14Monsieur Perron.
01:06:15You don't seem to realize.
01:06:16You don't seem to realize.
01:06:17That...
01:06:18That our particular...
01:06:19Our particular...
01:06:20Gentlemen, gentlemen, gentlemen.
01:06:21You don't make sense.
01:06:22One at a time.
01:06:23Now, what is this all about?
01:06:24Martin is in jail and I am ruined.
01:06:26He's ruined.
01:06:27Martin is in jail.
01:06:28Will you kindly keep this echo of yours quiet?
01:06:30Yes, quiet.
01:06:31Quiet, quiet.
01:06:32Quiet, quiet.
01:06:33I don't see that either fact interests me.
01:06:35Your mother has been caught again in a trifling indiscretion.
01:06:38May it trifle?
01:06:39He attacked your daughter again.
01:06:40Ha!
01:06:41Again?
01:06:42The first time was an outrage.
01:06:43But if there's a second time...
01:06:44You should try on that.
01:06:46Don't try to keep guessing what I'm going to say.
01:06:48You mean what you should say.
01:06:49Huh?
01:06:50Something has got to be done.
01:06:51Monsieur.
01:06:52To help you, I would do nothing.
01:06:54Oh, thank you very much.
01:06:55But to keep my daughter's name unblemished, I've moved.
01:06:58Heaven and earth.
01:06:59Now, the world.
01:07:00Oh, the world.
01:07:01Well, maybe I cover a little too much territory.
01:07:03Gentlemen, gentlemen.
01:07:04Marta is in jail.
01:07:05And you're ruined.
01:07:06Yes, right.
01:07:09Hello there, daughter.
01:07:25Father.
01:07:26Well?
01:07:27Is there anything new in the paper?
01:07:28Oh.
01:07:29You and Marta still have the headlines.
01:07:30Oh, how long do you think they'll keep him in jail?
01:07:32Maybe forever.
01:07:33It's a second offense, you know.
01:07:34And he's considered dangerous to the entire womanhood of France.
01:07:39Oh, that's good.
01:07:40Oh.
01:07:41That's good.
01:07:42Oh.
01:07:43Oh.
01:07:44Oh.
01:07:45Oh.
01:07:46Oh.
01:07:47Oh.
01:07:48Oh.
01:07:49Oh.
01:07:50Oh.
01:07:51Oh.
01:07:52Oh.
01:07:53Oh.
01:07:54Oh.
01:07:55Oh.
01:07:56Oh.
01:07:57Oh.
01:07:58Oh.
01:08:00Oh.
01:08:01Oh.
01:08:02Oh.
01:08:03Oh.
01:08:04Oh.
01:08:05Oh.
01:08:06Oh.
01:08:07Oh.
01:08:08Oh.
01:08:09Oh.
01:08:10Oh, please stop being an important publisher and be an important father.
01:08:14But, But your excellency.
01:08:15Gentlemen, gentlemen.
01:08:16I have had a hundred telegrams.
01:08:18My phone has been driving me mad all afternoon.
01:08:21all afternoon. An army of women, some beautiful, some so-so, are now waiting in my ante-room,
01:08:28all...
01:08:29Demanding his release?
01:08:30Exactly.
01:08:31You mean to tell me that you want to be the first man to go down in history to refuse
01:08:33a thousand women?
01:08:35No. Yes. To uphold the law, I'd refuse any woman anything.
01:08:41Who is this man? He's the Minister of Justice. Is he? Are you? Are you really?
01:08:46Yes, really.
01:08:47Hello, how are you? I'll tell you what I'll do. You let me have Martha,
01:08:51down for one month, and I'll let you have him for ten years now. Very generous offer.
01:08:55But it's entirely without precedent.
01:08:57Did Napoleon wait for precedence?
01:09:01Why don't you confess that you're the monster?
01:09:03Why don't you confess that you're an idiot?
01:09:05Well, I don't mind.
01:09:06Well, all right, then...
01:09:07Gentlemen, gentlemen, a very fine point has been raised by the idiot. I mean, this gentleman
01:09:12here. A fine point about Napoleon. Like him, I adhere to my decisions. In this case, I could
01:09:18do absolutely nothing.
01:09:19Nothing? Nothing?
01:09:20Nothing. Nothing.
01:09:23Uh, pardon me. Hello? Oh, oh. Hello, darling. It's my little wife.
01:09:32The Empress Josephine.
01:09:35Yes, my darling.
01:09:36You haven't forgotten about the new review that's opening tonight, have you, darling?
01:09:40Oh, darling, I'm sorry. I... An affair of state. This is...
01:09:47I know, but I have a new dress.
01:09:52Oh, it's an affair of state.
01:09:55I want to go, and I have a new dress.
01:09:59Oh, oh, my... No, my darling. Yes, my darling.
01:10:05No, my darling. Very well, my darling.
01:10:08Oh, gentlemen, that really was my little wife.
01:10:16You know, on second thought, Napoleon was also open-minded.
01:10:22If I grant your request...
01:10:24Oh, thank you so much, dear.
01:10:25Ah, ah, ah. But before I release Martin, you must first get the signatures of the chief
01:10:31for police, the inspector of prisons, the keeper of the seals, the registrar, commissionaire.
01:10:47Here comes the most important fiancée in Paris.
01:10:49Yes.
01:10:50Oh, yes.
01:10:51Oh.
01:10:56Oh, but Monique, my sweet, hurry, hurry. You'll be late for the opening.
01:10:59How can they be in the opening with Martin in jail?
01:11:01Oh, no, no, no. Have you not seen the extra? Just out.
01:11:04He is being released.
01:11:06Meravilloso.
01:11:07Well, I don't understand why you should be so delighted about that.
01:11:10Haven't you heard?
01:11:11Mario knows Martin is no actor and is just exploiting him.
01:11:15As an actor, he will be a colossal flap.
01:11:18Tonight, the audience will jeer him off the stage.
01:11:22I would have missed that for anything in the world.
01:11:25They wouldn't dare laugh at him.
01:11:27Yes.
01:11:28All afternoon, I have been practicing my hiss.
01:11:32Alfredo, if you so much as that were a hiss, one little hiss or even a shush, I'll...
01:11:38Now, Monique, if you do not permit me to hiss him, I... I break off the engagement.
01:11:44You will?
01:11:46Most likely.
01:11:47Come on, Father. You're not dressed for the theatre either.
01:11:50Wait a minute. I've torn up the tickets.
01:11:53All right. I've got four seats with the compliments of the manager.
01:11:57Oh, all right.
01:11:58All right.
01:12:15Congressman!
01:12:16Yes?
01:12:17Release my turn.
01:12:20Here's the release. Here's the release. Take it. Take it. Take it.
01:12:22Honey, Philippe, you released him when the show starts in 15 minutes. Come on. I'm not interested.
01:12:26What?
01:12:27I'm going to stay here.
01:12:28Well, after all the trouble we went to get you out.
01:12:30Yes, I'm staying here.
01:12:32I'm not going to be made a fool of any longer.
01:12:34Headlines, photographs, fan mail, my name in lights.
01:12:37Not because I'm an actor or a singer, but because I'm a freak.
01:12:41Well, you tell your newspapers that the monster has retired to private life in jail.
01:12:47It's that Peleron girl.
01:12:49I hurt you, Toto.
01:12:50Do you think that I'd be interested in a girl that allows them to arrest me just because
01:12:54I kissed another girl, a girl I don't care that much about?
01:12:57Oh, then you kissed the wrong girl again.
01:13:00That's marvelous. I can just see the headlines tomorrow morning.
01:13:02Monster weakened.
01:13:03Disappoints audience.
01:13:04Refuses to face music.
01:13:05Rejects career.
01:13:06And Monique will see it at breakfast, and she'll turn to Papa Peleron and she'll say,
01:13:10I was right to let them arrest him. He turned out to be a coward after all.
01:13:18Let's go.
01:13:19Yes, let's go.
01:13:26So tell the orchestra to play the overture.
01:13:28They've already played it.
01:13:29Well, tell them to play the game.
01:13:30Where's Martin's dress suit?
01:13:32Bruno has it on, but I got the veil.
01:13:35You will be fortunate if the imposter does not appear.
01:13:37Then I shall assume my rightful place.
01:13:39The show must go on.
01:13:40Yes, and if Martin gets here, those clothes come off.
01:13:52Hurry, hurry.
01:13:53You better start getting undressed.
01:14:09Let me have a program, please.
01:14:11This seat is reserved for Monsieur Martin. It's part of the show.
01:14:24Oh. I beg your pardon. Excuse me.
01:14:26Got my wrong seat.
01:14:28A hundred tanks if you get us there in time.
01:14:29And a black eye if you don't.
01:14:30Start the show.
01:14:31Bring up the curtains.
01:14:32Bring up the curtains.
01:14:33Bring me down, Martin.
01:14:34you don't. Start the show. Bring up the curtains!
01:15:04Dean, here we go!
01:15:14Dean, here we go!
01:15:19Dean, there we go!
01:15:21Come on, boys!
01:15:22The rain was drifting, and I was drifting, and so I thought to see a movie was dripping.
01:15:47It was so dark there, so nice to bark there, especially on one rainy afternoon.
01:15:53A lovely stranger there beside me, and there was danger, but no conscience there beside me.
01:15:59I squeezed the hand, and oh, it was so grand, and that lucky rain, a rainy, rainy afternoon.
01:16:06Upon the screen there was a scene of love supreme, but in between I caught a glimpse of loveliness divine
01:16:16that stole away, this heart of mine.
01:16:19Believe me, met her, who could resist her?
01:16:22Before I knew what I was doing, I had killed her.
01:16:26A salty temper, a salty temper, brought us together on one rainy afternoon.
01:16:32Love has a funny habit, it takes you on nowhere.
01:16:37Just when you least expect it, it's right beside you there.
01:16:42Love came and did I have it, and incidentally, look what one rainy afternoon brought me.
01:16:53The rain was dripping, and I was slipping, and so I thought to see a movie would be ripping.
01:17:00It was so dark there, so nice to bark there, especially on one rainy afternoon.
01:17:06A lovely stranger there beside me, and there was danger, but no conscience there to guide me.
01:17:13I smeared the hand, and oh, it was so grand, that lucky rain, a rainy, rainy afternoon.
01:17:20Upon the screen there was a scene of love supreme, but in between I caught a glimpse of loveliness divine.
01:17:35Believe me, mister, could you resist her?
01:17:38Before I knew what I was doing, I just...
01:17:41You're not offended.
01:17:42No.
01:17:43The story's endless.
01:17:46Thank you one rainy afternoon.
01:18:08You're busy and no one rainy day.
01:18:10You're vividly with you.
01:18:11I'm constantly요.
01:18:12I'm sorry, I'm sorry?
01:18:13We're alone.
01:18:14You're only quiet little της cups of theole.
01:18:16You're working on goodwill and you're not.
01:18:18You're working on goodwill.
01:18:19You're trying to get to that point of feeling.
01:18:20You're a good-looking thing.
01:18:21You're an old lady.
01:18:22I'm just a good-looking girl.
01:18:23The story's really tough.
01:18:24In fact, if I can get to your sides of the book, you're a good-looking guy.
01:18:26You're lucky to be on your own personal holiday.
01:18:29That's my mother.
01:18:31You're a good-looking girl.
01:18:32I was a good girl.
01:18:33I'm sorry.
01:18:34I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
01:18:35You're a good girl.
01:18:36¶¶
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