- 7 months ago
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00:03:39power to all of them. Try one or two first. That might not work. Just try one and see
00:03:46what there is in the human heart. Why not? Then perhaps we might see. Just any little
00:03:56fellow. They are all very much alike. I'll take one haphazard.
00:04:09Good evening, Mr. Fotheringay. Evening, Mr. Fotheringay. Good evening, gentlemen.
00:04:26Good evening, Mr. Fotheringay. Good evening, Miss Maybridge.
00:04:28You're usual? Please. We're just talking about miracles.
00:04:31Yes. You may not believe in miracles, Mr. Fotheringay, but I do. Not to believe in miracles,
00:04:36I say, strikes at the very roots of religion. Well, of course, Mr. Beamish says miracles.
00:04:40Exactly, Miss Maybridge. Now, we must make it clear what a miracle is, see? Some people
00:04:47would argue that the sun rising every day is a miracle. Well, some of us do.
00:04:52Not what I call a miracle. A miracle, I say, is something contrarily wise to the usual course
00:04:58of nature done by an act of will. Something that couldn't happen, not without being specially
00:05:05will. They will. So you say. Well, you've got to have a definition. What do you say, sir?
00:05:10Well... Oh, Mr. Cox? Oh, I'm not in this. Well, I agree. Something contrary wise to the usual
00:05:19course of nature. Have it so. What about it? Right. Now, for instance, take, um... What? That lamp. That lamp in the natural course of nature couldn't burn upside down, could it?
00:05:34Could it? You say it couldn't. Well, then you. You aren't going to say it could, are you?
00:05:40Well, then it couldn't. All right. Well, then, now. Here.
00:05:44Now, if someone comes along, see, as it might be me, and, uh, stands as it might be here, see, and says to that lamp, as I might do,
00:05:55collecting all my willpower, and I'm doing it, Mark. I'm, I'm playing fair. Says, here you.
00:06:04Turn upside down without breaking, and go on burning steady.
00:06:07I can't give it up any longer.
00:06:21It's got the drop!
00:06:25Now, Mr. Fothering Gay, will you be good enough to explain this silly trick before I come and chuck you out?
00:06:31Whatever, matey, do. Outside's the place for you.
00:06:33Outside the long dragon, for good and all.
00:06:37He's got to pay for beer, Mr. Cox.
00:06:38Yes, he's got to pay for a lampshade in the chimney.
00:06:41Why has he, didn't he, we?
00:06:43But, but, look here, Mr. Cox, I don't know what happened to that confounded lamp more than anyone does.
00:06:46I swear, I never...
00:06:48Come on, Mr. Conjurer, well, you don't want any more, Father.
00:06:50Are you going to get out before I come and chuck you out?
00:06:54Come on.
00:06:55There, come on.
00:06:56Now, I'm out.
00:06:56I never...
00:06:57I'm out.
00:06:59Ready?
00:07:00I don't understand what happened.
00:07:18Yes, but what did happen?
00:07:20For a reason for Mr. Cox to be so violent.
00:07:24I didn't want the confounded lamp to upset.
00:07:26It was, it was when I said, here, you, that he'd turn upside down.
00:07:37Here, you.
00:07:40Be lifted up about a foot.
00:07:47Don't lose your head, George McWetter, Fatheringay.
00:07:48Don't lose your head.
00:07:50It won't drop, not unless you let it fall, no.
00:07:51Now, keep burning steady.
00:07:54Don't drop any nasty grease about, and over you go, upside down.
00:08:04As you were on the table.
00:08:09Oh, it is a miracle!
00:08:11A blooming miracle!
00:08:13Why, I can make any amount of money with a trick like this on the musicals.
00:08:17I suppose I could do it to almost anything.
00:08:21Here, the table, yeah.
00:08:24Up!
00:08:27Down you go.
00:08:31Now, the bed.
00:08:34Up!
00:08:40Don't bump on the floor, my dear.
00:08:41Come down quietly.
00:08:42It's willpower, and hypnotism, and all that.
00:08:56Here.
00:08:59Here.
00:09:00You're growing into something bigger.
00:09:02A beer comb, like what conjurers have.
00:09:06Now, let's get some.
00:09:07A beer comb, like what's going on in the middle of the house.
00:09:09I...
00:09:11First of all, there's a kitten be under there.
00:09:17Ladies and gentlemen, a young, elfy kitten.
00:09:24Here.
00:09:24Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty.
00:09:26Here, you can't go under there.
00:09:27All these kittens.
00:09:29Makes a mess a bit of devil to pay.
00:09:32Kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty.
00:09:35Yes, come here, you.
00:09:36Oh.
00:09:37Ratted, you little beast.
00:09:38Rotten little pain cushion, you.
00:09:40Here.
00:09:41Oh, yes.
00:09:42He changed into a pain cushion now.
00:09:44All right.
00:09:45Got you.
00:09:55Presto, vanish.
00:09:57And you'll be an extinguisher again and we'll say no more about it.
00:09:59No.
00:10:05Oh.
00:10:06Better be careful.
00:10:08Here.
00:10:10Use scratches.
00:10:11Begin.
00:10:18I can go on doing miracles.
00:10:20All right.
00:10:35All right.
00:10:36All right.
00:10:37Two o'clock.
00:10:38I've been waiting for the shop.
00:10:39Come.
00:10:40How do I get it all with bitterly?
00:10:41Here.
00:10:42Here.
00:10:43All you medicals.
00:10:44Manage.
00:10:45Darling, I'll burn me candle to a stump.
00:10:46So.
00:10:47Oh, go.
00:10:48I'll go.
00:10:49I'll get it all with bitterly.
00:10:50In the middle of habered with a knife.
00:10:51I'll go.
00:10:52All right.
00:10:53I'll bring you a candle to a stump.
00:10:54All right.
00:10:55You're all right.
00:10:57Oh, all right.
00:10:58You're all right.
00:11:00All right.
00:11:01You're all right.
00:11:02Here.
00:11:03You're all right.
00:11:04You're all right.
00:11:05There's all right.
00:11:06Oh.
00:11:07I'll go out.
00:11:28Oh, it was a dream.
00:11:37What is it?
00:11:39Em.
00:11:47Em.
00:11:50God, it's true.
00:11:58I won't do any more.
00:12:01Not for today.
00:12:03I better think it over.
00:12:05It won't do.
00:12:07Miracle dropping off the ends of your hand before you hardly know it.
00:12:11No, Mr George McWhirter Fotheringay.
00:12:14It'll make you no end of trouble.
00:12:17How are you getting on without Mr Fotheringay, Ada?
00:12:31Don't you be vulgar, Mr Stoker.
00:12:33I'm not getting on and I'm not getting off with him.
00:12:35Or anybody else, see?
00:12:37As it happens, I can see.
00:12:39You don't have all the chaps running after you without doing something about it, Ada.
00:12:42Don't tell me.
00:12:43You're just pretending to be jealous, Bill.
00:12:47You've got no reason.
00:12:49You've got no reason.
00:13:09Morning, Miss Hooper.
00:13:10Morning.
00:13:11How long?
00:13:12Oh, not so painful so long as I keep it in the sling and don't use it.
00:13:15I wear the sling to remind me.
00:13:17Oh, I'm so hungry today.
00:13:18I wish it was lunch.
00:13:19I haven't the heart for lunch.
00:13:21Feeling ill?
00:13:22Feeling freckled.
00:13:23Freckled all over.
00:13:25I've got two more.
00:13:27Powder isn't any good, Maggie.
00:13:29I'd be all powder.
00:13:31Besides, he doesn't like it.
00:13:34He's nasty about it.
00:13:36Oh, well, never mind.
00:13:38What can't be cured must be endured.
00:13:43Oh.
00:13:44Who's this sneaking through from the cotton department?
00:13:47Good mind to give him the cold shoulder.
00:13:49And you can't.
00:13:50I know.
00:13:51Oh, I could.
00:13:52But I don't want to.
00:13:53Oh, well.
00:13:54Two's counting.
00:13:55Three's none.
00:13:56I'm off.
00:14:04You don't often come to see the haberdashery nowadays, Mr. Potheringay.
00:14:09New attractions and the costumes, I presume.
00:14:11Oh, we know all about that.
00:14:13I keep my art in this department, Miss Hooper.
00:14:16Really?
00:14:17Really.
00:14:18Maggie, I've been wanting to talk to you all day.
00:14:21Well, all morning.
00:14:22Really?
00:14:23Oh, serious.
00:14:24Maggie, something, something queer has happened to me.
00:14:28I can't make it in a table.
00:14:29You've not been left money or won a lottery ticket.
00:14:31No.
00:14:32How?
00:14:33Something queer.
00:14:34Not falling in love.
00:14:35That happened a long time ago, as well, you know, Miss Hooper.
00:14:38Really?
00:14:39Really.
00:14:40I'm afraid you had more than was good for you in the long dragon last night and upset the
00:14:48lamp.
00:14:49It can't be that.
00:14:50It has something to do with it.
00:14:55It's odd.
00:14:56You see?
00:14:57It's like this.
00:14:58If I say, let a thing happen, it happens.
00:15:01It's sort of prophecy.
00:15:02No.
00:15:03Sort of miracle.
00:15:04Go on.
00:15:05Oh, true.
00:15:06I can prove it.
00:15:07Here.
00:15:08Oh.
00:15:09Oh.
00:15:10Of course, that's a trick, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:15:11That's one of your sleight of hand tricks.
00:15:12Oh, they're lovely violets.
00:15:13You didn't get this bunch for sixpence I know.
00:15:15It's a good trick.
00:15:16They just seem to jump out of nothing.
00:15:17Oh, but if only one could work miracles.
00:15:18Just think of what you could do.
00:15:19For instance?
00:15:20He'll be sick.
00:15:21Oh, I hadn't thought of that.
00:15:22Now, here's my strained arm.
00:15:23What wouldn't I give just to lift things and put them away without thinking?
00:15:25Oh.
00:15:26Well.
00:15:27Well.
00:15:28Well.
00:15:29You didn't get this bunch for sixpence I know.
00:15:30It's a good trick.
00:15:31They just seem to jump out of nothing.
00:15:33Oh, but if only one could work miracles.
00:15:36Just think of what you could do.
00:15:38For instance?
00:15:39He'll be sick.
00:15:41Oh, I hadn't thought of that.
00:15:43Now, now, here's my strained arm.
00:15:45What wouldn't I give just to lift things and put them away without thinking?
00:15:50Well.
00:15:56Lift it.
00:16:06Oh, this little bothering guy.
00:16:08You're a healer.
00:16:09You've got the gift of healing.
00:16:11It ain't everything I've got.
00:16:13But the good you might do.
00:16:15Oh, I suppose I might.
00:16:16Perhaps I will.
00:16:17Now, there's Effie there.
00:16:19Heartbroken about her freckles.
00:16:21A fella hates freckles and she keeps on getting fresh ones.
00:16:25Well.
00:16:26I'll try.
00:16:28Effie!
00:16:31Effie!
00:16:32Do you know Mr. Fotheringay is a charm for freckles?
00:16:34Go on.
00:16:36Yes.
00:16:37Do do it, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:16:39Come on.
00:16:49Let all your freckles be gone and your confection be perfect.
00:16:57Oh!
00:16:58Oh, what?
00:16:59Where's the mirror?
00:17:00Oh, there.
00:17:05Oh!
00:17:06It's marvelous.
00:17:07How we done it, I don't know.
00:17:12How we came to me, I don't know.
00:17:16I'd just say to a thing, do this and do that, or be this and be that, and it seems to happen.
00:17:23It means willpower.
00:17:25I didn't know I had it till last night.
00:17:27When you broke the lamp and the long dragon.
00:17:30Get out of there.
00:17:32Well, don't you go breaking things here, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:17:35No miracles in the house or the shop, if you please.
00:17:38This is a drapery establishment, not a home of magic.
00:17:42But it cured my sprain.
00:17:46And look at her.
00:17:49All the same, it isn't wise.
00:17:51Major Grigsby's always fussing about breakages, as it is.
00:17:54What he'd say if he began throwing lamps about, I don't know.
00:17:59If I knew I was to always have it, I'd go in the music halls right away.
00:18:03I've always been thinking of that.
00:18:05I wouldn't.
00:18:06What would you do, Mr. Stoker?
00:18:07I'd do better than that.
00:18:09How?
00:18:10You've told rabbits to come, and violets to come, and complexions to come, and all that.
00:18:14You're the spirit of nature, Fotheringay.
00:18:17But all that's small, dear.
00:18:19What's to prevent your saying here?
00:18:21That's a 20,000 in the bank.
00:18:23A motor car save.
00:18:24And a big house.
00:18:25Maybe there's a limit, but it would be pleasant like to have that money in the bank.
00:18:28I'll think of that.
00:18:29But don't forget your gift of healing.
00:18:31He could have a miraculous hospital.
00:18:33What's to prevent him?
00:18:34He could start miraculous hospitals all over the place.
00:18:36Just go around once a week and clean everybody up.
00:18:39Needn't stand in the way of other things.
00:18:41And how about a miraculous tip or so for the Derby?
00:18:44Lord, if I had your gift, I'd launch out.
00:18:46I wouldn't go on honouring Grigsby and Blot with my services much longer.
00:18:50Fair news, Mr. Stoker.
00:18:51You have to give a month's notice, you know.
00:18:53The things you might do.
00:18:55You could be rich.
00:18:56You could be anything you liked.
00:18:58You could give presents right and left.
00:19:00You might meet all the celebrated people.
00:19:02You might go to court and see the King.
00:19:05Music halls indeed.
00:19:07I didn't mean to lay it all out so soon.
00:19:09I'm a bit frightened by it myself.
00:19:12I don't mean to do much with it yet.
00:19:14Anyhow.
00:19:15You listen to me, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:19:17Don't you do anything rash.
00:19:19You didn't ought to go about doing miracles just anyhow.
00:19:23You oughtn't to turn your gifts to selfish ends.
00:19:26Oh, here's uplift.
00:19:28Yes, I mean it, Mr. Stoker.
00:19:30This gift of miracles and healing is something very serious.
00:19:34You ought to have advice about it, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:19:37That's plain sense.
00:19:38You ought to have advice.
00:19:39Yes, I suppose I ought to.
00:19:41I hadn't thought of that.
00:19:43There's Mr. Maydick, the new Baptist minister.
00:19:46No, no, he ought to go to the vicar.
00:19:48What a nice mess they make of it for you.
00:19:50Either of them.
00:19:51Righteous old buffers without any imagination.
00:19:53Least way the vicar is.
00:19:54And Maydick's just a spouter.
00:19:56You take my advice, Fotheringay, and do yourself well.
00:19:59Don't give your gift away to anybody.
00:20:01There isn't a woman in the world who wouldn't love to have a man.
00:20:04Who could work miracles for her.
00:20:06You take advice, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:20:08Come on, Jane.
00:20:09Collect the plates.
00:20:10Miracle or no miracle, we've got to get on.
00:20:12We can't sit here and let the shop look after itself.
00:20:14Come on, come on, come on.
00:20:21Good night, madam.
00:20:22Good night.
00:20:23Come, come, come, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:20:24What's the matter with you today?
00:20:25Here we are, five minutes off closing, Simon.
00:20:26Look at it.
00:20:27Look at it.
00:20:28Place this in a muddle.
00:20:29Sorry, sir.
00:20:30I've had a bit of worry today.
00:20:31Won't take me long.
00:20:32You've got half an hour of tidying up for you.
00:20:34Here.
00:20:35Apple pie, order.
00:20:45Apple pie, order.
00:20:48Oh, hello.
00:20:49Yeah, sir.
00:20:52Look, what a minute's off closing, Simon.
00:20:54Look at it.
00:20:55Look at it.
00:20:56Place this in a muddle.
00:20:57Sorry, sir.
00:20:58I've had a bit of worry today.
00:21:00Won't take me long.
00:21:01You've got half an hour of tidying up for you.
00:21:03it hasn't taken long has it sir no you're quite right it hasn't taken long I didn't quite follow
00:21:28you it's clear very clear you're quite sure mr. fatheringay this sort of thing doesn't damage the
00:21:35goods doesn't good sir I can do anything absolutely anything if I want to enter that old moon I could
00:21:54do it haha all the saints and scientists in the world and nothing compared with what I can do and
00:22:02who's afraid I tell you who was afraid oh oh I broke my stick did they then did they oh what about master's
00:22:12gift of healing yes we'll make it all right and better yeah be not a stick but a but a tree a
00:22:18great big rose tree growing right there in the middle of the road all covered with lovely roses
00:22:23and get your breath why told Bobby winch oh I say this will never do here go back oh
00:22:39oh oh leave him alone let that rose tree vanish hello mister watch the game what's all this
00:22:53throwing about a brambles I'm throwing any brambles at you mr. winch I was just doing what you call
00:22:57working a miracle oh it's you mr. miracle worker it's you is it this is how you spend your nights
00:23:01this is how you do it hey well this time you've done one trick too many well you're not going to
00:23:05take it seriously mr. winch are you it isn't me that takes it seriously it's the law what run me in
00:23:11me so respectable oh you can't do it mr. winch I'm doing it now come on no I won't you're coming
00:23:18oh go to blazes
00:23:19golly he's gone to
00:23:24where am I he's got me into some sort of pitfall or something smaller than their tricks
00:23:32they laugh after here too I better make a note of this
00:23:36an officer should always make a careful note
00:23:38what was the exact time
00:23:40why the paper's going brown
00:23:44it's not on the boat's too oh dear what is this
00:23:49there can't be a nice place to go to can't send a chapter like that
00:23:54where's my stick out oh here let my stick be back not broken
00:24:01what am I to do about mr. winch what am I to do about mr. winch
00:24:07winch I can't leave him there I can't bring him back
00:24:11I oh I know
00:24:15San Francisco it's been nearly halfway around the world
00:24:19let mr. winch wherever he is go immediately to San Francisco
00:24:25oh it's lovely it's heaven being like this
00:24:44Oh, it's lovely. It's heaven being like this.
00:24:55And to think you as jealous, Bill, of poor little Fotheringay.
00:24:58Heaven is miracles.
00:25:00Must be awful late, Bill.
00:25:02Golly, it's past a half hour.
00:25:04Time we were indoors.
00:25:05The door of a lock will have to ring.
00:25:06We can't go back together. Every moment talk.
00:25:08Yes.
00:25:10You go back to the front door.
00:25:11I'll go round the back and chin up the water pipe to the men's dormitory.
00:25:13I've done it before. The window's never fastened.
00:25:16Give us a last kiss, Bill.
00:25:24What the...
00:25:28Oh, Ada.
00:25:30You're the very girl I was thinking of.
00:25:32Why, it's George.
00:25:34Do you know the time, George?
00:25:35Nice to be you and live out and not have to be in by half past ten every night.
00:25:39I could stay out all night in moonlight like this.
00:25:42Couldn't you wait?
00:25:42Yes, it's lovely. It's real lovely.
00:25:45Done any more miracles, George?
00:25:47Oh, nothing to speak of.
00:25:49It's not much fun doing miracles alone.
00:25:52You sort of want an inspiration, like I...
00:25:55Oh.
00:25:57Here.
00:25:58See the church clock?
00:25:59Here.
00:26:00You and every clock and watch in Dewington be put back twenty...
00:26:03No, twenty-five minutes.
00:26:05Now!
00:26:06See, my watch too.
00:26:07You'll be all right now, Ada.
00:26:09If you do have to ring and be let in, while the whole clock will bear you out.
00:26:12Well, but it's a real miracle.
00:26:13There's nothing to what I can do for you.
00:26:14You know why I asked them to put it back twenty-five minutes instead of twenty minutes, so that I can have a bit of a word with you.
00:26:17Well, you deserve five minutes, George.
00:26:18Well, you deserve five minutes, George.
00:26:19I can do extraordinary things for you.
00:26:21You seem to stir up my imagination.
00:26:24It's very kind what you have done.
00:26:25It's very kind what you have done.
00:26:26I could do anything for you, Ada.
00:26:27If only I could get you so as you thought of love me.
00:26:28I would indeed.
00:26:29I would indeed.
00:26:30You know why I asked them to put it back twenty-five minutes instead of twenty minutes,
00:26:31so that I could have a bit of a word with you.
00:26:32Well, you deserve five minutes, George.
00:26:33I could do extraordinary things for you.
00:26:37You seem to stir up my imagination.
00:26:40It's very kind, what you have done.
00:26:42I could do anything for you, Ada.
00:26:45If only I could get you so as you thought of love me.
00:26:52I would indeed, so long as I could get you to want to kiss me.
00:26:59George, miracles or no miracles, you mustn't talk to me like that.
00:27:03Why shouldn't I?
00:27:04Don't you care for me?
00:27:05Not in that way, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:27:07Why not?
00:27:08I don't know.
00:27:09I just don't.
00:27:10Anybody else, eh?
00:27:13Oh, I know.
00:27:15That's not your business, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:27:17Anyhow, I don't care for you.
00:27:18Not in that way.
00:27:19You're a nice sort of a chap, but not my sort of a chap.
00:27:21Whether there is anyone or no one, it wouldn't make any difference.
00:27:24I couldn't love you.
00:27:26No?
00:27:27No.
00:27:28And supposing I was to make you love me?
00:27:32You couldn't, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:27:34You wouldn't, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:27:38Oh.
00:27:39Oh.
00:27:40Oh.
00:27:41Oh.
00:27:42Now, milady.
00:27:43You be in love with me.
00:27:46You be hopelessly in love with me.
00:27:49You forget all about Bill Stoker and be in love with me.
00:27:52Now!
00:27:53No!
00:27:54That's where your miracles don't work, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:27:56That's where your miracles don't work.
00:27:57I'm not an old clock or a rabbit or anything like that.
00:28:00Good night, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:28:01Good night, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:28:02Yes, sir?
00:28:03Send Fotheringay to me, please.
00:28:04Ask Mr. Fotheringay to come and see me.
00:28:05Yes, sir.
00:28:06You sent for me, sir?
00:28:07Yes.
00:28:08Sit down and look for some days.
00:28:09Oh, goodness.
00:28:10I know.
00:28:11My miracles don't work.
00:28:12Well, I'm not a clock or a rabbit or anything like that.
00:28:15Good night, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:28:18Good night, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:28:21Yes, sir.
00:28:25Send Fotheringay to me, please.
00:28:26Uh, ask Mr. Fotheringay to come and see me.
00:28:29Oh, yes, sir.
00:28:34You sent for me, sir?
00:28:36Yes, sit down, Mr. Follingay, sit down. I want to have a little talk with you.
00:28:39Sit down, sit down.
00:28:40Cigarette?
00:28:44Now, I must confess, I was very struck with the way you tidied your department yesterday evening.
00:28:48Very much struck.
00:28:49It was practically instantaneous, wasn't it?
00:28:51Now, I wonder if you could tell me how you managed that.
00:28:54I understand it's not the first thing of its kind that you've been doing lately.
00:28:57Well, I could tell you, and so to speak, I couldn't.
00:29:01Roughly, you might call it a sort of miracle.
00:29:04Oh, come, come, Mr. Follingay.
00:29:06Isn't that rather an old-fashioned word, miracle?
00:29:12Well, say, something contrary-wise to the course of nature done by an act of will.
00:29:18Will? Ah!
00:29:19Now you're talking about something I can understand.
00:29:22After all, a man doesn't build up a big and vital business like this,
00:29:24with three branches already and 49 assistants,
00:29:27out of one small shop with five hands in seven short years,
00:29:30without knowing something about willpower.
00:29:32Willpower over customers, willpower over patrons, willpower over assistants.
00:29:37But, frankly, Mr. Follingay, you've never struck me as the kind of young man
00:29:41who would go in for that sort of thing.
00:29:42Well, I haven't.
00:29:43It's just come to me.
00:29:45Have you ever studied dominance,
00:29:47exercised your willpower against others,
00:29:49tried to get down to feelings and motives?
00:29:51Well, I don't seem able to do that.
00:29:53But you have tried.
00:29:55Well, it wasn't much good.
00:29:56No, no, tell me, tell me.
00:29:57Well, I just wanted someone to feel differently about me.
00:30:00In order of anything, never mind about that.
00:30:02Oh, I see a lady in the case, eh?
00:30:05No, we won't talk about that.
00:30:06Come down to hard facts.
00:30:08I want to make you a business proposition.
00:30:09Now, I take it you could straighten up the shop in the evening,
00:30:12open the shop up in the morning,
00:30:13deliver the parcels to the addresses given,
00:30:14all by the aid of miracles.
00:30:15Is that right?
00:30:17And naturally, you must confine your gifts entirely to our organisation.
00:30:20No outside miracles.
00:30:21You get me, Mr. Follingay?
00:30:23Yes.
00:30:23Now, I've been working all this out.
00:30:24I've figured it out in my head.
00:30:26Now, for the first year, we can guarantee you, sir,
00:30:28an income of, um, three thousand pounds.
00:30:32Three thousand pounds.
00:30:33And why?
00:30:33Because there isn't a competitor in the business
00:30:35we couldn't down by sheer ability and economy.
00:30:37We can extend over the coast.
00:30:39We can extend all over England.
00:30:40There's no limit with such an advantage.
00:30:42Oh, you may call me a dreamer, Mr. Follingay,
00:30:45but let me tell you
00:30:46that every great organiser of business is a dreamer.
00:30:49I could sit in that chair
00:30:51and see Grigsby Blot and Follingay
00:30:53running into millions of capital,
00:30:55spreading all round the world.
00:30:57I suppose that San Francisco
00:30:59is pretty nearly all round the world, isn't it?
00:31:01Practically, sir, San Francisco.
00:31:02So why do you ask?
00:31:03Well, I was just wondering.
00:31:05You happen to know how long it takes to get here from San Francisco?
00:31:07Three weeks or a month, I should say, but why?
00:31:08Why?
00:31:09Well, three weeks anyway.
00:31:10Certainly all that, but why do you ask?
00:31:12I was just wanting to know.
00:31:14I've got a sort of relation out there.
00:31:18Is that all you've got to tell us, Mr. Winch?
00:31:22That's all I've got to tell you.
00:31:24Ah, he's crazy.
00:31:25He doesn't begin to make sense.
00:31:27What's all this dope about roses and brambles anyhow?
00:31:30Now you can't make a story out of that.
00:31:32He's screwy.
00:31:33That suit of his is a real, genuine English cop's uniform.
00:31:37There's something in it.
00:31:38Fourth dimension or something.
00:31:40Yeah?
00:31:41Well, where'd he scram from?
00:31:43That's all that interests me.
00:31:44How about the clothes?
00:31:45Oh, to hell with the clothes.
00:31:47The Ed won't print a line of that stuff.
00:31:49You can have people disappearing all over the States.
00:31:51That's good copy, that is.
00:31:53But this guy, appearing suddenly?
00:31:55You can't stuff him with that.
00:31:58But there's the clothes, I tell you.
00:31:59And his poor little toasted notebook.
00:32:01And notes you can't read.
00:32:03But it's true.
00:32:04He's a genuine English cop,
00:32:05and he's come straight here from Essex in a flash.
00:32:08How?
00:32:08Lord knows.
00:32:10But he came so fast that his shoes and his notebook are frizzled.
00:32:12This newspaper racket is playing nuts.
00:32:16We're supposed to be looking for something new.
00:32:18Well, here is something new.
00:32:20Something that's never happened before.
00:32:22And just because it doesn't fit in with any of the stock stories,
00:32:24we've got to cut it out.
00:32:26Just the same as we'd have had to cut out any stories about flying and submarines
00:32:30or radio 50 years ago.
00:32:32It's new news.
00:32:34And the truth is, we mustn't have new news in a newspaper.
00:32:37You must let your imagination bear upon this.
00:32:39If you let this gift of yours just splash about, you'll waste it.
00:32:42It'll do no good to you or anyone else.
00:32:44Just a miracle here, a miracle there.
00:32:46Just scattering miracles, cheap as dirt.
00:32:48But canalized, concentrated, monopolized,
00:32:52then it can be an immense thing.
00:32:54It is very attractive.
00:32:56Attractive?
00:32:56It's the logic of a thing.
00:32:58I see us springing up in the night
00:32:59to be giants of the distributing world.
00:33:01Big men, big business, big money.
00:33:05Monopoly.
00:33:05We can't miss it.
00:33:07Now, I'd like to have the opinion of Mr. Bamfield upon this.
00:33:10Mr. Bamfield of the bank over the way.
00:33:11This is an extraordinary proposition, Major Grigsby.
00:33:15If you had told me two hours ago
00:33:17that miracles would be worked in this parlor
00:33:20and that I should be confronted with a project
00:33:22for a world net of miraculous chain stores,
00:33:26I should have scouted the idea.
00:33:27But you don't now.
00:33:28I do not.
00:33:29Mr. Fotheringay,
00:33:30I think you may count on having the London and Essex bank behind you.
00:33:33Yes, I see.
00:33:35That is the way it ought to be done.
00:33:37I don't know much about finance and business management myself.
00:33:42But now,
00:33:42what you propose is that I should be sort of exclusive.
00:33:48Oh, you must confine your gift entirely to Grigsby, Blot,
00:33:51and Fotheringay.
00:33:52It's just there that I don't quite see it.
00:33:54Oh, why?
00:33:56Well, take this gift of healing and all that sort of thing.
00:33:58I don't want to make a business of that.
00:34:00We could have free clinics in all our stores,
00:34:02healing Tuesdays and Fridays,
00:34:03and special bargain lines.
00:34:05Free, absolutely without charge.
00:34:07We might do that.
00:34:09Then why don't we give all the stuff away?
00:34:11Why make a business of it?
00:34:12You can't do that.
00:34:14You positively can't do that.
00:34:15No, no, I suppose not, no.
00:34:20Why do we want to borrow money?
00:34:21What did you say?
00:34:22Issue debenture?
00:34:23You must have the thing on a sound financial basis.
00:34:27Ah, we've got to make money by it.
00:34:30Solvency serves the test of service.
00:34:33Yes.
00:34:34If we want money, why don't we make it right away?
00:34:36You can't do that without disastrous results.
00:34:38Look here.
00:34:46You can't do that.
00:34:47It's illegal.
00:34:48That's a forgery.
00:34:49That note's a forged note.
00:34:50Well, look at it.
00:34:51It's all right, isn't it?
00:34:53Oh, this won't do.
00:34:55You mustn't make money just when you want it.
00:34:58It strikes at the root of everything.
00:35:00It puts the whole banking system completely out of gear.
00:35:03People must want money.
00:35:05And they must want commodities.
00:35:06But if I can give them everything they want, what?
00:35:09But in what instance?
00:35:09What would they do?
00:35:10They wanted to do anything.
00:35:13Couldn't they have some fun like...
00:35:18Now, now, now, I can assure you, my dear Mr. Fotheringay,
00:35:22I can assure you, I have studied these questions,
00:35:25very profound questions, before you were born.
00:35:29Human society is based on want.
00:35:32Life is based on want.
00:35:34Wild-eyed visionaries, I name no names,
00:35:36may dream of a world without need.
00:35:39Cloud, cuckoo land.
00:35:41It couldn't be done.
00:35:42It hasn't been tried.
00:35:44Has it?
00:35:47Oh, hello, Fotheringay.
00:35:48Where have you been all morning?
00:35:49He's got the sack.
00:35:51Not I.
00:35:52I've been considering a business proposition.
00:35:55What would you think of Grigsby, Blot, and Fotheringay,
00:35:57and miraculous stores, eh?
00:35:59I've had a firm proposal.
00:36:01Big business.
00:36:02I hadn't realized it before, but there's money in these miracles,
00:36:06properly handled.
00:36:07Big money.
00:36:08Gee.
00:36:10Miraculous stores, eh?
00:36:11Yeah, that's about it.
00:36:13Put it all out of work.
00:36:16Oh, I hadn't thought of that.
00:36:18You haven't signed on?
00:36:19No, I sort of felt I ought to think things over a bit first.
00:36:22Who's in this?
00:36:23Grigsby in the bank.
00:36:25Yes, but why make money for them?
00:36:26Why not make it for yourself?
00:36:27Why fatten up old Grigsby at Banfield?
00:36:29No, you can't do it that way.
00:36:31You can't make money for yourself.
00:36:32Why not?
00:36:33Well, Mr. Banfield explained it very clearly.
00:36:36You see, it would lead to social chaos,
00:36:38universal bankruptcy,
00:36:40break up the social system.
00:36:41Break up old Grigsby at Banfield, you mean?
00:36:44No, he didn't think it ought to be done.
00:36:45He'd do it fast enough if he could do it himself.
00:36:47Huh?
00:36:48I tell you, Fotheringay, these chaps are sucking on to you.
00:36:51Go away, if I had your gift.
00:36:52Well?
00:36:53I'd run the world.
00:36:55Well?
00:36:55Well, it's a new idea.
00:36:58But it's all right.
00:37:06Hello, George.
00:37:07Hello, I'm making yourself prettier than ever, eh?
00:37:10Wish I needn't do it.
00:37:11But still, it has to be done.
00:37:13Lipstick and powder.
00:37:14Why don't you do something for me like you did for Effie?
00:37:17Considering all you might do,
00:37:18I think you're pretty mean about your miracles.
00:37:20It won't run to a diamond tiara or anything of that sort, I suppose.
00:37:23Why not?
00:37:25Here.
00:37:27Diamond tiara.
00:37:29Now.
00:37:30Look at yourself.
00:37:32Oh!
00:37:33It's lovely.
00:37:34It might be real.
00:37:36Of course it's real.
00:37:37You couldn't do a pearl necklace, George.
00:37:39Why not?
00:37:40Here.
00:37:41Pearl necklace.
00:37:42Oh!
00:37:43Oh!
00:37:43Oh!
00:37:44Oh!
00:37:46Oh!
00:37:47Wait.
00:37:50Why worry about it?
00:37:51Why keep on that old black dress?
00:37:53Let her be dressed in splendid robes like, uh, like, like Cleopatra in the movies.
00:37:58Please.
00:38:00Now!
00:38:02Oh!
00:38:03Oh!
00:38:07Ada, you're wonderful.
00:38:08Look.
00:38:09It's you, her wonderful, Mr. Father, again.
00:38:12I...
00:38:13I...
00:38:13I've never seen anything like it.
00:38:15If Bill could see me now, he'd faint.
00:38:21Customer.
00:38:21Here.
00:38:22Be as you were before I change you.
00:38:24Oh, no.
00:38:24Now.
00:38:28Oh!
00:38:36Maggie.
00:38:39What are you doing here at this time of night?
00:38:42I don't know.
00:38:42I...
00:38:43I just came.
00:38:44I...
00:38:44I think I wanted to see you.
00:38:47Maggie, there's something frightening about this medical working.
00:38:51I...
00:38:51I told you to get advice about it.
00:38:53I get nothing but advice, but it's all different.
00:38:56I don't know where I am.
00:38:57I'm all full of wonders, and I...
00:38:59I...
00:38:59I daren't let them loose.
00:39:01I...
00:39:01I...
00:39:02I get thinking of things and wanting things.
00:39:06I...
00:39:06I can't tell you.
00:39:09I...
00:39:09I got a bad imagination, Maggie.
00:39:11I got a dangerous imagination.
00:39:14Well, what did I tell you?
00:39:16You go and see Mr. Maydick.
00:39:19You could see him tonight.
00:39:20He gives people advice in his parlour.
00:39:23I wonder what he'd tell me.
00:39:29Come in.
00:39:33There's a young man, sir.
00:39:34Very anxious to see you.
00:39:35Name of Fatheringay.
00:39:36He says it's urgent.
00:39:38Fatheringay?
00:39:38I don't know him.
00:39:40Respectable?
00:39:41Not a mendicant?
00:39:42Oh, nothing of that sort.
00:39:43But he's in trouble, sir.
00:39:45He says he wants advice.
00:39:46Show him in, then.
00:39:47Show him in.
00:39:48I never refuse myself if it's like that.
00:39:50Always ready to give what I can give.
00:40:04Come in.
00:40:12Well, sir, what can I do for you?
00:40:14I was told that you sometimes give good advice to people.
00:40:17I have a peculiar sort of trouble.
00:40:20Go on.
00:40:21Well, a very extraordinary thing has happened to me.
00:40:23See, I used to think that I couldn't do anything.
00:40:26And now I find I can do, well, practically anything.
00:40:30By willpower.
00:40:32What do you mean, willpower?
00:40:34Work miracles.
00:40:36Miracles?
00:40:37Yes, miracles.
00:40:39No end of them.
00:40:40My dear, sir, there are no such things as miracles under the present dispensation.
00:40:43I can assure you of that.
00:40:45Would you think differently about it if I worked one?
00:40:47I should think it over.
00:40:48I have an open mind.
00:40:50No one can deny me that.
00:40:51Oh, well.
00:40:53Here goes.
00:40:55What should it be?
00:40:56Make something appear?
00:40:57I'm sick of messing about with kittens and rabbits.
00:41:01Bunchies of flowers.
00:41:03I know.
00:41:04Let there be a real tiger.
00:41:07There, on the after right now.
00:41:10There!
00:41:13Baird!
00:41:15Please do exist!
00:41:23How's that for a miracle?
00:41:24Something wonderful, yes.
00:41:27A miracle.
00:41:28No.
00:41:29You mean to say that wasn't a real tiger there on the earth rock a minute ago?
00:41:32No, my dear, sir, no.
00:41:34A joint hallucination.
00:41:36The thing is quite well known.
00:41:37Hallucination.
00:41:38I'll bring it back.
00:41:39Oh, no, don't do that.
00:41:41Look at those paw marks.
00:41:43Hallucinations don't mean footprints behind them, do they?
00:41:45I'm willing to be convinced.
00:41:47Yes, sir.
00:41:51There are paw marks.
00:41:53Some large carnivore.
00:41:56You know, Mr.
00:41:57Mr.
00:41:58Fatheringay.
00:41:59Fatheringay, that was a miracle you did just now.
00:42:02You need to have no doubt about it.
00:42:03It was a miracle.
00:42:05Can you do other things of the same kind?
00:42:07That's what I want to consult you about, Mr.
00:42:08Mady.
00:42:08You see, I can.
00:42:09I can do all sorts of things.
00:42:10I can heal people.
00:42:12I can clear things up and set things right.
00:42:13I can move things from one place to another.
00:42:15I can change things to other things.
00:42:17I don't seem able to get inside of people's minds.
00:42:22But apart from that, there doesn't seem to be a limit.
00:42:24Not a limit to what I can do.
00:42:25It's power!
00:42:26What am I going to do about it?
00:42:27What would you do about it?
00:42:28What would anyone do about it if they had it?
00:42:30You know, Mr.
00:42:30Mady, it's a very remarkable thing.
00:42:32Before I realized I had this power to work miracles,
00:42:35I thought I knew everything I wanted and couldn't get it.
00:42:37And now, now that I can have, in a manner of speaking,
00:42:40have everything, something seems to hold me back.
00:42:45Power!
00:42:46Power!
00:42:47My dear young man, what might you not do?
00:42:49What may you not do with the world?
00:42:51Healing.
00:42:52And you thought, why not banish disease from the face of the earth?
00:42:56Doing one swoop what science and medicine have been striving to do,
00:42:59little by little.
00:43:00A world without disease.
00:43:02I hadn't thought of that.
00:43:03I just thought I'd go around, you know,
00:43:05and cure somebody here and somebody there.
00:43:08Sweep it all away!
00:43:09A world glowing with health.
00:43:11Newborn.
00:43:12The world's great age begins anew.
00:43:15The golden years return.
00:43:17I see such splendor in this power of yours.
00:43:20Such hope for our race.
00:43:22Such starry hope.
00:43:24Talking of upsetting things, Major Griefby and Mr. Banfield were very anxious if I shouldn't upset things.
00:43:29They did seem to think there might be a catch in it.
00:43:32Well, what Mr. Banfield said was that human beings were held together by money, and by wanting money and things.
00:43:38And if they didn't want, what would there be for them to do?
00:43:42Bankers and businessmen, save me from them.
00:43:45Man bankrupt in a world of plenty.
00:43:48I suppose they ought to have a better way of managing things.
00:43:51Of course, but will they ever trouble to do so until they're compelled?
00:43:54Until things overtake them?
00:43:56No, sir.
00:43:57And that is where we begin.
00:43:59Tomorrow.
00:44:00Suppose every poor soul in the world found a five-pound note in hand, suddenly, so that they could go out and buy things.
00:44:08Think of that.
00:44:08Think of the effect of it.
00:44:09I would like to do that.
00:44:11You don't think there might be a catch in it?
00:44:15Will Mr. Banfield have fits?
00:44:17Condulsions, I hope.
00:44:18Condulsions.
00:44:19Condulsions.
00:44:21And then healing all over the world.
00:44:25Everybody's suddenly saying, ah, I feel strong.
00:44:28I feel well.
00:44:28Well, I don't see any harm in that.
00:44:30Nor I.
00:44:32It might put the doctors out a bit, though.
00:44:34And why?
00:44:34Well, they naturally think it's their business to keep us healthy.
00:44:37Oh, heavens, are we to remain needed to please the bankers and the businessmen, and unhealthy to provide fees for the doctors?
00:44:43Well, I just thought it might complicate things a bit, but...
00:44:46Well, sleep over it first.
00:44:48We shall have to provide for the doctors and the traders.
00:44:50I admit that.
00:44:51These things can't all be done in a rush.
00:44:53There's an inertia about things which has to be considered.
00:44:57I shall think and think.
00:44:58I shan't sleep, Mr. Fotheringay.
00:45:02Not a wink.
00:45:03I shall keep vigil.
00:45:05The last night of human misery.
00:45:07The pause before the dawn.
00:45:10What a glorious thought.
00:45:12Will you be able to sleep?
00:45:14Well, I've had a pretty busy day.
00:45:16Oh, you are one of God's innocents.
00:45:18You will sleep.
00:45:19But I cannot bear that we should part like this.
00:45:23Let us do one simple good thing before we go to bed tonight.
00:45:26An earnest of all we mean to do.
00:45:29Let me think.
00:45:30One little thing.
00:45:32Ah.
00:45:34There's my neighbour, Colonel Winstanley.
00:45:36Chairman of the bench.
00:45:37Full of influence.
00:45:38And all that influence against progress.
00:45:41He's always treated me with the utmost civility.
00:45:43I bear him no malice.
00:45:45He sits late at night and drinks.
00:45:47Drinks I fear far too much.
00:45:49I'm no pedant in these matters.
00:45:50But he, he boozies.
00:45:53He will be sitting there now.
00:45:54A decanter by his side.
00:45:56Change it to some simple, non-intoxicating fluid.
00:46:00And his house is all decorated with swords and weapons.
00:46:04Beat them into plowshares.
00:46:06Turn his swords into briefing hooks.
00:46:09Well, but will he like it?
00:46:17Oh.
00:46:18Oh.
00:46:48you rang sir i rang six times you go to bed too early moody and now tell me what the devil's the
00:46:59matter with this whiskey it's gone wrong it's lost its taste it's flat it's worse than flat
00:47:03it's mawkish it's the real old stuff sir out of the old jar it's not the real old stuff and it's
00:47:07not out of the old job what have you been doing to it moody i'm sure you you can assure me i'm
00:47:12drinking whiskey when i know i'm not what's going on that's more like in water instead of whiskey
00:47:21that the house falls down don't go and see me and go and see don't stand staring there something's
00:47:26happened there point point moody why don't you come and tell me i don't understand it sir
00:47:37i stepped through the all about three minutes ago everything was as right as could be and now it's
00:47:41it's frightful sir what's frightful what do you mean frightful what are you talking about it's gone
00:47:46sir oh it's only all the swords are gone sir the whole collection and there's a lot of other things
00:47:52look like agricultural implements to me some mostly on the floor such as this for example
00:47:59what is this
00:48:02blinking bolshevik thing what is it what what's it mean what
00:48:07that's
00:48:12If I could lay my hands on a fool that's done this, I'd have no pleasing you, Hinton,
00:48:27stole my swords.
00:48:29I understand that.
00:48:31What do you mean by leaving this, this?
00:48:35Fuck!
00:48:36Beats me.
00:48:37Who's that ringing at this time of the life?
00:48:41I can't imagine, sir.
00:48:43Don't imagine. Don't imagine. Go and see men.
00:48:45Yes, sir.
00:48:47Anyone's playing any sort of game with me?
00:48:52Inspector Smiddle, sir.
00:48:53You come in, come in, confound you. Come in and see what's happened to my weapons.
00:49:00Well, it's some more of it, sir.
00:49:03More of what?
00:49:04There's been a serious outbreak of miracles in the district, sir, quite beyond anyone's experience.
00:49:09Miracles?
00:49:10Yes, sir. Miracles.
00:49:12There aren't such things.
00:49:14Not properly, sir, which makes it so disconcerting, sir.
00:49:16We didn't come here disturbing you this time at night about nothing.
00:49:19But seeing as you're the chairman of the bench, we thought you might be able to help.
00:49:22What is it? What is it?
00:49:23It's about this constable winch of ours, what's been missing since last night.
00:49:26We've searched everywhere.
00:49:27We've dragged the mill stream. We've made inquiries up and down the railway line.
00:49:30What, you don't expect me to find him for you, do you, at ten minutes to midnight?
00:49:34No, sir, but I've got a cable.
00:49:35What's the good of a cable?
00:49:36A telegram, sir, from San Francisco.
00:49:42San Francisco, the police do hinder.
00:49:45Dear Hendon, is Constable Winch missing? Stop?
00:49:50Appeared mysteriously here. Stop, slightly injured in street riot, provoked by himself as some sort of a hoax.
00:49:59With all due respect, sir, it isn't a hoax. It's something more serious. It's that young fellow, Fotheringay.
00:50:04Fotheringay!
00:50:05Fotheringay!
00:50:11Moody!
00:50:14I must have a whisky.
00:50:16If I don't have a whisky, my mind will give way.
00:50:19Yes, sir, but...
00:50:22Good Lord!
00:50:24Is that another miracle?
00:50:26I'll get another jar, sir.
00:50:27I'll get one with the seal unbroken.
00:50:34After a while...
00:50:36...
00:50:37...
00:50:39...
00:50:40...
00:50:46...
00:50:51...
00:50:53...
00:50:56...
00:50:57...
00:50:58...
00:50:59...
00:51:00Come on, sir.
00:51:12Come on.
00:51:30soap and water it's nastier than that sir i should say it's one of these temperance drinks
00:51:36well moody anything to say
00:51:40oh sir i got my weaknesses but i'd as soon poison a baby a stamper with whiskey
00:51:47if you ask me it's fatheringay again sir fatheringay more
00:51:50fatheringay i'll keep calm i went to myself and everybody to keep calm oh perfectly calm
00:52:02i'll see this fellow tomorrow no fuss i'll talk to him quietly calmly no good getting heated
00:52:10i'll have it out with him we'll bring him to me smithels sort of casually just for a bit of advice
00:52:17in my garden don't alarm him and keep an eye on him when you're bringing him keep it crunching
00:52:23up your sleeve if he raises a finger if he's so much as looks like san francisco
00:52:30club him i'll see you through
00:52:38ah so that's the little miracle worker don't look like it little cad
00:52:44spoiled my whiskey ruin my collection
00:52:50calmly calmly well mr superintendent so this is the young man they wanted me to see is it
00:52:56this is mr fatheringay sir as directed
00:53:00at your service sir i want to talk with you i want a serious talk with you
00:53:08chairman of the bench and deputy lieutenant the former owner of a valuable collection of weapons
00:53:16and the proprietor of a once powerful seller
00:53:20as a fellow citizen of the unfortunate constable winch
00:53:25i want naturally and properly a talk with you
00:53:29i want if i may say so an explanation well
00:53:36how i wish to know why it's almost as odd see i just seem able to do things yes and nice friendly
00:53:46things you do eh well it's hard to know what to do without offending people offending people well how
00:53:52the devil else do you expect me to take that trick with my whiskey and my collection oh mr mady
00:53:58mady yeah yeah for that new preacher chap
00:54:01what's he got to do with it well he was he was advising me advising no
00:54:05yeah he he said if for once you should go to bed sober
00:54:13would you mind saying that again yes if you wasn't to drink too much
00:54:18go on sir go on i can bear it i want to hear you out then we might
00:54:29make it a sort of a symbolical action of change changing your weapons see
00:54:35that would sort of prepare your mind for the peace of the world and when might that be due
00:54:40oh very soon now uh peace and plenty mr mady made it very plain now we've uh said about it
00:54:47you're going to set about it when i'm seeing mr mady at 12 and i suppose we'll start the golden age
00:54:55somewhere in the afternoon
00:55:00i suppose they'll start the golden age somewhere in the afternoon
00:55:04under the circumstances i hardly like to mention my collection and my whiskey oh don't mention it
00:55:19we didn't mean to annoy you i'll i'll make it all right now
00:55:24is that all you do just that that's all
00:55:26the miracle's done and my whiskey's whiskey and the collection back again yes you can go and
00:55:32see it if you like the extraordinary thing is i can do these things why i could i could turn this
00:55:38garden into a into a palm tree forage and fill it with tigers there's no limit to what i can do there's
00:55:43no limit to what you can do you me just seems comes out of me you can do practically anything you
00:55:51want me to do anything now but a fellow of your sort well why not a fellow of my sort do you want me
00:55:57to do a miracle for you something big well perhaps it's just as well to know what we're up against
00:56:06all right how'd you like to see india again hey um some place in india bombay let both be in bombay now
00:56:13oh colonel are you satisfied we're in bombay has changed a bit i recognize it yes i admit we're in
00:56:24bombay how the devil we're going to get back heaven knows i had to talk to some men after lunch that's
00:56:30all right you shall let's both be back in the colonel's garden at dewinton now
00:56:36well is it all right can i work miracles or can't i no doubt of it
00:56:47talk about abolishing distances
00:56:57there you see what i tell you yes i see
00:57:01now mr meddy he has ideas he has imagination there's no sense in going on with business and
00:57:08banking and all that seeing these gifts that have come to me because that's what mr meddy calls a
00:57:13want system and we're going to live in a plenty system and no need for people to be hard up anymore
00:57:17no need for people to be sick and ill and hungry no need for robbing and cheating and no need for war
00:57:22no need for anything as far as i can see it will be different but mr meddy says you can't work
00:57:27miracles and stay as you are but if you put an end to war sir as i gather you intend to do before
00:57:32tea time today and as i'm beginning to believe you can if you put an end to competition make work
00:57:36unnecessary give people more money than they know what to do with then i ask you what are people
00:57:40going to do sir what are they going to do well i'm a i'm a bit puzzled about that myself but mr me
00:57:48meddy says we just ought to go about loving one another go about loving one another who about
00:57:58loving one another are you mad sir are you human have you no sense of decency the most private
00:58:05most sacred feelings mr meddy seemed to feel so differently about it all of course there's there
00:58:12is art and science and making things fret working fret working foolery well we can give it a trial i
00:58:21suppose there's no telling what human beings will do mr meddy says mr meddy says mr meddy says that you
00:58:27are going to start this bedlam millennium of yours within six hours what's going to happen to us what's
00:58:32going to become of us all i don't really know exactly that myself it'll be a bit of a change but mr
00:58:38madey mr fatheringay won't you give all this business a few hours a few days consideration
00:58:48before you let it rip i mean after all we've got we've got a sort of order here kind of civilization
00:58:56we've got the empire yes but see that's all very well for people like you but most of people are well
00:59:02of people like me now it's perfectly natural for people like you to want to keep things as they are
00:59:06i'm all for letting them loose see i don't mind change i think change might be a lot but haven't
00:59:12we had enough change the last hundred years railways electricity radio it shook us up a bit but it
00:59:19doesn't hurt us it doesn't kill us now i'm all for more and better change
00:59:28what a perfect afternoon and you think that it is new year's eve for the whole world
00:59:34we're on the verge of the greatest change this earth of ours has ever known want will vanish and plenty
00:59:40rain bring out the old bring in the new you know it's as though i wanted to loiter a little before
00:59:48the beginning and the end silly old earth what a lesson you have to learn you don't seem to realize
00:59:55how serious it all is but we are sitting here in our old homes and old habits and old ways of life
01:00:03these two dangerous lunatics are going to change the world change us change everything you know
01:00:09their business ideas grigsby oh you kill business you kill credit leave the country open an alarm for
01:00:16anybody that cares to start an air raid i tell you this measly little draper's assistance the most
01:00:22dangerous lunatic loose i was thinking a lot last night one or two points i'm not clear about at
01:00:29all see human beings have been brought up to live in a certain way that's what mr grigsby and
01:00:34mr bamfield mean now if i give them plenty of money and plenty of everything i think it'll be a
01:00:40little bit like winning without playing a game what are people going to do do you think people
01:00:44people as a general rule i mean will take to artistic work oh but we must make them once
01:00:49that's just where my miracles stop you see i can't get inside people i've tried a bit
01:00:54no no i can turn them upside down i can move them to san francisco back in a jiffy i can
01:00:58make them rich and i can cure their illnesses but people remain people but you can influence them
01:01:02indirectly healthier people are happier people easier people are kindlier people people who are not
01:01:08vexed and driven are better to a certain extent to a certain extent but isn't he going to let a lot of new
01:01:14desires loose i got some powerful desires my dear young man how often has it been my lot to hear that
01:01:20confession from young men in their strength i know i understand we all have these powerful desires
01:01:28even in my case never mind about your case i'm talking about my case well i assure you there's
01:01:32nothing singular about you exactly that's the whole trouble these men are mad dogs they have to be treated
01:01:38like mad dogs it's our world and all we care for against their confounded antics one happens to see red
01:01:57there's such a thing as justification
01:02:08there's that girl maggie hoopoe told me to come along and see you i know her a very pure simple
01:02:37sensible girl that's her i'm very fond of her very fond of her but the girl the sort of girl that sets
01:02:44me wanting isn't her near me wandering of desire you must restrain it why should i i happen to want
01:02:50a girl called ada price maggie hooper sews on my buttons and mends my socks and she's perfectly lovely
01:02:56when she's sewing on my button buttons and mending my socks but there's a come and take me about ada
01:03:03price the trouble is as old as the hills you must resist temptation let your motto be service why
01:03:09should i why service why should i make everyone rich and healthy and get nothing out of it myself
01:03:14why should that bill stoker blast him get away with it my dear sir
01:03:19they're shooting at us lie down stop that no more bullets no bullet to hit me nothing to hurt me
01:03:26the wound on my scalp stop bleeding and be healed me be invulnerable now here you fired that shot let
01:03:34your gun barrel be solid
01:03:41that's all this silly world can do to a man who can work miracles why never meant to do anything
01:03:46better for them to help it well now i'll find the man who fired that shot
01:03:49i have a pretty good idea who it is i suppose it wouldn't be as well to make me ill be vulnerable
01:03:56too all in good time i'll look after you for a bit if i'm safe trust me everyone is safe come on
01:04:11camarade i thought it was you none of the others would have been as outright you're a man of action
01:04:15i knew it was you there's no working against miracles you've got to get ahead with your silly
01:04:22monkey tricks i suppose i tell you i'm sorry i didn't get in with that first shot
01:04:28now get ahead with mr medig's magic millennium and see how you like it no you don't mean to say you've
01:04:35had a gleam of sanity no i've been learning hard and fast these last few days colonel perhaps there
01:04:39won't be a millennium perhaps there can't be millennium maybe there's full of ideas but i have my feelings
01:04:44and it's me that's going to put it through you don't mean to say that you're going to give up
01:04:48all the things we talked about just because he tried to shoot you oh it isn't only that
01:04:53some of your things i shall do and some i shan't i that work miracles i me that has the power
01:04:58i this isn't the world of grigsby or bamfield it's not going to be the world of the reverend
01:05:02silas medig no it's going to be the world of george mcguerter fathering and as i want it so it will
01:05:07be what i want i get you you've all you just wanted to use me now i'm going to use myself
01:05:13what for to get just exactly what i fancy that's the natural human thing to want and that's what i
01:05:19want i'm just beginning to get the hang of this miracle business you've had your way the only one
01:05:24of you that came near the common horse center it was bill stoker and much good that'll do him when
01:05:29i've done with him come along matey i may want you we're going to start a world of george mcguerter
01:05:34fotheringay right now in the colonel's house has anything more happened happened what hasn't
01:05:46happened he's mad and dangerous and bullets won't kill him
01:05:49oh
01:05:56i got my own ideas at last this old world of yours is over there's going to be a new miraculous world
01:06:02and it's going to be mine i i guess you think i'm being needlessly obstructive but uh people have
01:06:09to to adapt themselves they must have time hasten slowly and get nothing done no we're going to
01:06:15begin here and now the the world of george mcguerter fotheringay according to his dreams and according
01:06:20to what he's been told and found out since he began thinking about things one word sir whatever
01:06:25you may think of mr bamfield you will at least admit that i am not unprogressive i ask you before
01:06:30you do anything else make a plan nothing can be done without a plan what plan balance order the
01:06:36creative aids then talk away in age hesitate sway to and fro mess about no we're going to begin my
01:06:44new world now in my lifetime where i can enjoy it glory in it and have some fun in it wait wait let
01:06:51things go on just a little longer
01:06:55let this house be turned into a great splendid beautiful palace and us in the great hall of it
01:07:02now
01:07:06it's not bad eh architecture improving yes but we we hardly seem dressed for you
01:07:26let us be sumptuously dressed according to our character and station so as not to appear strange
01:07:31here me the prince made in bamfield as councillors the colonel as the captain of the
01:07:36guard you'll enjoy being captain of the guards after a bit colonel
01:07:42it looks empty here doesn't it offers your old regiment colonel let his old battalion be here and dressed accordingly
01:07:52now
01:07:52and let all the butlers and footmen in essex be here suitably dressed same style as the building now
01:08:05now now we have a place to work in place i can turn around in you don't think i like things large did you
01:08:12you saw to it i was born small and grew small nobody likes being small and now let's have here miss ada
01:08:19price as she was yesterday afternoon when i made her lovely now
01:08:23this is something like a miracle you're going at last george where's bill can't you do without bill for a moment
01:08:35oh i thought you'd have bill here somehow all this is sort of his style no ada it's my style
01:08:42let there be two thrones here now oh you might have a throne for bill no and that throne isn't for you
01:08:50either let maggie hooper be here dressed as a queen now
01:08:56oh maggie my dear here we are beginning the miraculous reign of george mcguerter fotheringay
01:09:06what shall we do with the world eh oh don't make it dull and goody goody george i didn't mean to say
01:09:12that about bill i didn't you said it plenty of your sort you just stand down there looking lovely until
01:09:20i take notice of you and just to keep you company let the nine next prettiest girls in new hinton be
01:09:28here beautifully dressed too now my world's gonna be full of pretty women ten a penny oh dear george
01:09:40make the world happy don't make it selfish or showy let this be really the world's great age
01:09:47begin anew justice peace plenty you don't think i know how to do it you shall see
01:09:56nothing in a hurry and nothing delayed i've learned a lot in the last three days
01:10:00i think i'm beginning to get the hang of it all
01:10:05let the greatest bankers in the world come here and stand here now let the leading men who own and
01:10:12direct great businesses stand here let the chief men who rule the world
01:10:16the politicians the presidents the councilors the commissioners the people who tell the news
01:10:20papers what to say the people who teach and preach let them come here yes all of them
01:10:38the people who rule the world
01:10:46the people who rule the world
01:10:48the people who rule the world
01:10:50i've been told to take thought take counsel so i've got
01:11:07you here all of you why not now i've got you now i've got the whole crowd of you
01:11:19you people who have your faces in the newspapers
01:11:22people who sit in high places walk through crowds and get all the praises and the cheers
01:11:26i've got you people who run the world to tell you to run it better run it better
01:11:36you've lived on the fat of the world you've been trusted with the world
01:11:40chaps like me have had to trust you willy-nilly and what did you do for us what sort of a deal
01:11:44did you give us for all the trust we gave you what was our share oh i know i had to wait wait wait
01:11:52young and seedy and died be patient for umpty years while you held all the stuff in your hand
01:11:58and did nothing much your crowd cared did you worry about it not a bit but you better worry now
01:12:11and why have you never stopped war why a hundred men in high places resolute men
01:12:16not afraid of a little brain work could have put a stop to war forever anytime these last 20 years
01:12:20but i guess you like the bands and the spurs and the feathers too much and you never thought about
01:12:25chaps like me nice and pompous you look reviewing the troops being saluted and did you really forget
01:12:33about chaps like us not even that a trench full of dead chaps like me made you feel all the more real
01:12:42and important eh shooting at me i've been shot at won't work there's an end of shooting can't shoot
01:12:50truth i'm here and i'm going to stay here george mcguerter fotheringay power has gone out of your
01:12:55hands you can smirk and strut smile look important for a little while perhaps but i tell you power has
01:13:03gone out of your hands that's your sun setting now it's late afternoon for the whole crowd of you
01:13:09god you know it and where's he gone to this power it's come to me a common vulgar fella that's driven me
01:13:17wild it's come to me by a miracle you you better do something and do it soon you've got to make a new
01:13:26world that'll make me happy get together you important people try to be really important
01:13:32talk it over among yourselves but talk real stuff do it quickly and do it now and if you don't do what
01:13:40i tell you i'll wipe you out as a child wipes a slate that's me that's what i've found in me since i
01:13:50began looking that's what i've dug out of george mcguerter fotheringay but they must have time to think
01:13:58about it time if i gave them time to just waste it they've had generations of time those people
01:14:02and what do they do with it but these things cannot be done instantly they are going to be done here and
01:14:07now a good and happy world a sensible world then when i've got that off my chest i'll see i'll see
01:14:14what's to be made of living inertia oh inertia i'm always up against inertia i've got a power in me
01:14:22that calls for change i'm tired of your old world and it's inertia give them at least you tomorrow
01:14:27the sun is setting give them the night to think and discuss no worry about the sun setting i can
01:14:32stop that sun from setting i want my new world now but you can't stop the sun setting what i say
01:14:39i can i'll stop that sun setting i won't let it set until i'm ready to go to bed and everything's
01:14:44cleared up but then you have to stop the earth rotating and i will don't argue with me medic
01:14:49don't argue with anyone there's a time when argument stops earth stop rotating stop now
01:14:57what has happened he stopped the world going round not suddenly yes then everything loose is
01:15:14being flung about by its own inertia and that's the end of your nasty little pets upon their silly
01:15:20little planet preposterous what did i tell you it's all over gone
01:15:33no no it's not over he's still alive he's got a charmed life he's sort of that
01:15:40let everything be as it was a minute before i went into the long racket bow
01:15:49here old heart a minute you haven't done yet
01:15:52the the miracles if it happens that i that i have been working miracles then on the word go
01:16:01let me not be able to work any more miracles ever
01:16:03forget it forget all about it wipe it out no more miracles you can't control them
01:16:17and what has your experiment shown brother what did you get out of that sample man
01:16:22egotism and elementary lust a little
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