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  • 7 weeks ago

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00:00MUSIC
00:14Right, listen, the name of the game is Sal's.
00:16No freebies, no IOUs.
00:18Aunty Cat, these went off yesterday.
00:20Oh, I hope this job lot from Nantes don't salmon out of the square.
00:23Look, best before ain't the same as you, Spy, all right?
00:25You check my label and I was best before night of the fight,
00:28but I can still cut it.
00:30Plus, Fat Elvis has chucked in some artillery.
00:32Two for the pop for the kids, yeah?
00:34They rinse the parents while they rinse each other.
00:36Splash for cash.
00:37Right, we are the Slaters.
00:39They hate us because they hate us,
00:41so we pull together as a family, all right?
00:44Father house arrest prisoner, of course,
00:46but today is a new day, so we slap on a smile, yeah?
00:48Because no-one throws a party like the Slater birds!
00:51Woo!
00:52Got it!
00:53What's the matter, Elvis?
00:58Tommy's worked her fine. She's on phone. You should be delirious.
01:02I know, I know.
01:03Just, um...
01:04I tried to ring Zoe this morning, of course.
01:08There was no answer, but...
01:10it was a UK dining term.
01:13Slakes, don't worry, okay?
01:15Cos if Zoe's home, I'm fine, all right?
01:17Seriously, don't worry, leave her.
01:23Zoe's home!
01:28Somebody will be in with you soon.
01:31Would you like some water?
01:32Can we talk?
01:49Look, I've done everything I can, but Andy's like a dog off a bum.
01:55If my brother goes down for this, I will make sure that you go down with him.
01:59Patrick's his dad? What can I do?
02:02You're an eyewitness.
02:03And Uncle Jack said that Patrick hasn't even done his written statement yet.
02:07If you want to keep your secrets safe, just figure it out, yeah?
02:11Today.
02:12She needed help, Mum, all right?
02:27She ain't gonna accept her off account.
02:29What was she supposed to do?
02:30She's her mum, Stacey.
02:32Yes, I know. You don't need to tell me that.
02:34Well, she needs to know. The sooner the better.
02:38What, I will tell her, Mum, all right?
02:40But let's just see if Alfie can get hold of her,
02:42because if this bomb is going off, I don't want it to be nuclear.
02:46Oh, she needs to know today, Stacey.
02:48You know I'm rubbish at keeping secrets.
02:51Come on, we've got a barbie to set up!
02:53Are you looking for anything here?
02:55No, you said you didn't, weren't you?
02:56Yeah, but you're not going to say anything, are you?
02:57Hey.
02:58Do you need this flat to free?
02:59Why don't you put that away?
03:00Then maybe I'll put out.
03:01I've got to get to the arches.
03:02What?
03:03There's an oil change emergency, isn't there?
03:04No, I'm stupid.
03:05No, can you just be honest?
03:06You swerved me yesterday, and so if you're not really alive, I'm going to get to the arches.
03:07What?
03:08There's an oil change emergency, isn't there?
03:09No, I'm stupid.
03:10No, can you just be honest?
03:11You swerved me yesterday, and so if you're not really alive, I'm not going to be
03:12No, of course I am.
03:13I'm just taking things slow.
03:14I'm a gentleman, you know?
03:15Plus, I've got to make a living.
03:16To be continued, yeah?
03:17No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
03:19We are just honest.
03:20You swerved me yesterday, and so if you're not really that into this thing…
03:23No, no, of course I am.
03:24I'm just taking things slow.
03:27I'm a gentleman, you know.
03:30Plus, I've got to make a living.
03:33To be continued, yeah?
03:44We're going to get you home, OK?
03:45Don't worry.
03:46This will all sort itself out.
03:48you both know i'm going away lauren yeah so uh don't talk to me like i'm a kid
04:01cause they're gonna treat me like one when i'm inside are they
04:05oscar browning i'm derek harder your solicitor your uncle filled me in a solicitor he told
04:17you he's got him a solicitor a tiger never changes his spots he's a browning it's a leopard oscar's
04:24his family he's only doing what we do i don't even attack old men exactly it doesn't matter anyway
04:32he's caught banter rights no solicitor or police relation will get him out of this
04:38don't worry dad at least you know what side i'm on he's right patrick i'll go to the police station
04:46later on and you can give a statement then we can just focus on this wedding
04:52all right patrick right yes you're quiet still upset after your little chat with lauren
05:00i was passing that you told me how sorry he was
05:06shame that's all you're just a kid yeah but by the grace of god go i right you know
05:12you're not in this case the only shame in this situation is that boy got away with this for so
05:19long thinking anything else is stupid who you talking to bro denzel don't don't what i may not
05:27be made of honor but howie is patrick's best man that is enough what that is enough what is done is
05:34done we have got to remain a united family in this okay howie it's a shame for all of us
05:50what's this black friday is that burnt and he's trying them well brilliant
05:54but you know what i mean well it ain't friday and they ain't burned they're well done all right
05:59hello hello yeah no comp no comp no comprende por favor listen can you call me hello can you call me
06:07back later yeah which is gracias thank you all right is that about hayley again no no don't
06:12strictly business you know me marlena marbella i'm off can i nick you in it yeah it stays give me five
06:17minutes just gotta get this all right what with you and your mum's face and him trying to scan the
06:23spanish something's going on it's tommy innit i know he didn't apologize but i know he's sorry right
06:30and so am i kids eh always close to breaking your hearts i love ya
06:43how you doing as it's almost national cinema day and i've decided to uh celebrate it with you mr
06:51mitchell the dawn corleone of walford i've decided we're gonna go for godfather one and two
06:58why did you continue he can't be a bit the nero can you miss brandon oh no doctor i'm you two
07:08were having a movie day we're having a street party come and get some fresh air come on chop chop a bit of
07:15community spirit no it's national cinema day so we're gonna um yeah oh yeah i need to get that
07:31uh patrick patrick i just wanted to sing you don't have to apologize
07:45the boys
07:49they were like choke on cheese you know they had one thing in common though temper
07:54oh yeah one took the right part and the other one didn't
08:04meant what i said though it's a shame
08:08look um i might be overstepping the mark here but
08:21lauren
08:24she's in bits and i feel for her you know everything she's been through with the baby and
08:30the family she's lost oscar being here really helped her out i know he done a terrible thing and he regrets it
08:47i like to become your best man for a reason
08:51because i care about you and i know deep down you don't want to send that kid to prison
09:00but this could be oscar's first second chance only when he gets to take the right path
09:11and if you want to give him that chance i'll back you
09:16i just just want this thing over man
09:20putting him in prison ain't gonna end this for anybody not you not anyone
09:25you can still get him home patrick
09:32and i'll help if that's what you want
09:36it's your call
09:37you said the old bill was sniffing about
09:55no no i said um
09:58there was a copper rolling about for you there it is
10:08oi oi copper get it
10:13you ain't funny no
10:15well you know what else ain't funny you turning up late to have a line when the superior drops you one
10:22ravi's my boss not you but the kit man works for the chairman too as well don't he doesn't mean he could tell the manager who to play up front
10:30hey relax man it's a chain of command thing
10:34like see for example you wanted to stop using that soldier of guys flat as our den
10:38but what did ravi do huh he sided with me i told you don't call him that
10:43my man learning exactly fast is he
10:49you think you're scary don't you
10:54this is scary you really are
11:00how about now hmm scared
11:04see i've done my fighting i don't need to prove myself no more i've been there done that
11:09my stripes i earned them you ain't
11:18do you know what the old heads used to call me okie
11:22you probably finger some long african name shortened down or something bruv nah see when i was 15
11:27the old heads used to say okie dokie and i like that bruv so when i was young and they knew
11:33said and done they would call me and i would never say no i'd say okie dokie and it would be done bruv
11:44are you mad
11:45you probably turn me over but at least he's man enough to take what he wants right but i'll come
11:57out on top still
12:04see how so i was treating you all then if they want a dog to chain up then they can buy one
12:10yes tommy i like it
12:14you uh what's the latest with your your dad in that voicemail has he manned up yet or what
12:18no it's an embarrassment
12:25see there's there's two types of men in this world you've got the alphas and the beaters
12:31your dad my dad they're beaters they was born beaters and they'll die beaters don't make them
12:38bad men just just weak ones
12:43but me and you we're the alphas well women don't run our lives we do
12:49it's about brotherhood isn't it that's why we've got to stick together
12:53what's this the eighth lecture this week you think i've got time for this
13:08yeah some of the men they'll go into some problems
13:13full hazard over here could earn the stripes you see this this is trouble this puts you away and
13:19me away for years you understand if you can't handle this without aggro
13:26then you're of no use to me do you understand
13:29hide it in kojo's flat if you have to i don't trust him with it i'll take it then
13:45you come to me with these problems and we'll deal with it you understood
13:51okey dokey boss
13:59he's trying all right he's calling around everywhere he's trying to find leaves this is
14:14our baby we're talking about you couldn't find water if he fell out of the boat you said you'd
14:18give him a day i know but it feels like a week already but what if she turns up hurt and cat finds
14:26out that you've been keeping this a secret it'll kick off
14:34do you know enough some love oh mum don't mum please
14:39mum right come on who wants one well i want one of them and dental records to see whether mine was
14:45actually a cow we had a load of pool toys going using the other week they might get you them
14:51well who said anything about pool toys if you're in a pool you don't need a water pistol you just
14:55splash don't you huh pat i have a word yeah have you heard a noise nuisance i'm looking at it
15:04and i we're trying to get jimmy down for a nap all right and this trash fest isn't helping all right
15:09so either turn it down or i'm reporting you that's a public order offence oh leave off bill it's a
15:15party here freddie get him an hot dog a little mini chipolata hey if the size suits
15:23oi it's bill you owe me two quid i'll get you a tail jean steaks i want to go and get to me yeah
15:36i have to go and have some fun we all make mistakes tommy left ages ago hey okay so uh
15:50what have we missed now don't they right you and you upstairs now
16:04this is a joke how long are they going to leave him waiting longer he waits the more likely he is to
16:09slip up slip up they got me banged to rights can't slip up any more than that can i just listen
16:22to him please if uncle jack sent him then he must be good oh i know i know i mean that no comment
16:28advice derrick oh i would have never thought of that what's the point it's done we are all here
16:37to help you you can't help me all right and this bloke ain't gonna help neither yeah so stop talking
16:43to me like we all don't know how this ends yeah okay it's done all right i'm waiting oscar branning
16:50don't come in mr truman has just provided us with a further account of the night of the assault
16:55supported by mr danes these contradict mr truman's initial statement of events
17:01in light of which with a lack of corroborative forensic evidence i don't propose to interview
17:05you at this moment you're free to go
17:14i'll just turn it off she'll give up eventually
17:19oh here we go next generation of fishwives have turned up what are you doing here lil
17:25shopping around for a baby daddy for her too child benefits and your aunt paid it's the line
17:29of work around here innit who are you talking to you what you're gonna do about it
17:37you really think you're that scary with your in-sale boy band curtains do you really think
17:42i couldn't smash you both all over this place if i wanted to john let's go nah nah this is the problem
17:48these slappers thinking they can say what they want to a man like me are you mad mad do me a favor
17:52you mad you are you got it then i'll show you how much of a man i really am hey what are you
17:59doing tummy your son's mate is threatening us so let me get home now
18:05stay away from little boys with big mouths they never grow up
18:15get out
18:28all those months all that lying jean listen i'm sorry all right what's done is done but
18:35i'm trying to find her well you did find her then you lost her now you know that she's in this country
18:40and you still can't find her honestly you're about as much used as a chocolate teapot the pair of you
18:46you both have to tell cat when she gets back none of this putting it off till later no more
18:52wild goose chases she's right alfie no no no no no you know what she's going through with tommy right
18:59now okay listen she's my wife okay so please let me fix this yeah please alfie alfie maybe
19:11he thinks this is the real thing so he's taking things slow plus he's fit and single and given
19:19your track record i think that's the main thing yeah but then they're slow and then they're stationary
19:24i mean normally at the start you need a taser to keep a bloke away but i mean i i can't stop him
19:28from running away at the moment uh well please tracy ghost talk is it yeah dad it's important to be a
19:35gentleman right of course because harry's being a proper gentleman in the tree taking things slow
19:42but she thinks because he's got a work call and she's not been invited back to the flat yet
19:48that he's not that into her that's stupid right tell her well he'd have to be an idiot not to be
19:55interested in you but he's not as big an idiot as people think he is see even dad agrees
20:02so is this what his dopey little podcast heroes are teaching him to threaten women
20:11hey is that what you want to do and all hey knocking about with with women beaters yeah does that make
20:19you feel like big men i want you a silent partner
20:30you really hate me didn't you cut them i'm serious all right i'm not pulling out the poor
20:35mum card to guilt trip him i've been there done that he just hates my guts
20:40tommy i don't blame you all right i've made loads of mistakes all my life with all my kids
20:50you was happy when you was with zach and i remember thinking that's my son that's my boy
20:56and he's gonna come home soon but look at you maybe it's me maybe it's something in me that that
21:04has turned you into this person hey that wants to sell his family to perverts
21:11that wants to beat girls up i didn't threaten them joel did you hit me tommy if you can hit your mum
21:19then what would stop you from hitting them i would do anything for you anything for all my kids
21:25but if that's not good enough maybe it ain't or they'll all be here
21:30right right if you want to go and live with zach if you want to go and stay with joel that's fine
21:42all right i love you but if you hate me then i'm just no good for you am i
22:00you are one lucky boy you know what you need to go around to patrick and harvey and just say thank
22:16you well i don't fire on that you just dodged a bullet i'd stay out the firing what's he doing
22:21out well it's a long story but he's learned his lesson and he's coming back home with us you know
22:28fresh start on that just try and keep out of trouble now yeah will you you have got to be joking
22:37paste our family on the force what a justice system you've got a problem is you take it
22:42up with your dad or the best man all right it was there cold not mine
22:51right you see johnny fontaine well he's obviously based on what's his name um sonata yeah yeah
23:01uh uh little known singer but um the author
23:09mario puto he denied it completely ridiculous and it's obvious oh hang on
23:19hello oh no sorry um well uh maybe she'll call you back
23:27oh sorry i thought it was yours mine i mean that's my phone nigel yeah i'll answer it myself in the
23:33future you said he'd call back right uh i'm just popping out for a bit
23:41i can't believe this let that old age predator get away with this i'm gonna have to call mo and tell
23:52her to sleep with one eye open baby it's what patrick wanted you know andy you okay with this
23:58it's patrick's call and i made a call for chelsea it's one thing helping your daughter but we're
24:03talking about it's done and i don't want talking about it anymore this was you wasn't it so you're
24:10all too blind to see it but i can see straight through him that talk with lauren he's been that
24:16kid's one man pr manager now something's going on now tell my dad why you really wanted that boy to
24:23walk free anthony no tell him what's really going on now i'll tell you what's going on
24:29you're jealous because i'm patrick's best man and you're his son acting like you care when all you
24:37do is the bare minimum hey that's enough
24:43anthony
24:47this is my choice now there's been enough trouble in this house that you miss and i don't want you
24:55add in to it okay so accept it or go home and that is your choice
25:09so
25:11so
25:15so
25:23so
25:29so
25:37Coge?
25:49Look, can you knock next time?
25:51Yeah, because this is my place too as well, you know?
25:54I know you've got keys in that, but...
25:57My name's on the lease.
26:00So I come and go, so please.
26:04My brother.
26:07My daughter.
26:09It's my job to make sure they're safe.
26:12So this gentleman act, it better be for real, Harry.
26:16Shh.
26:16Shh.
26:26Shh.
26:34Shh.
26:35Shh.
26:36Shh.
26:37Shh.
26:38Shh.
26:38you guys anything no right i'll give zach and vicky a ring give him the heads up hopefully
26:50he's listened to me for once this is all my fault you know i should have taken a deep breath and
26:56and talked to him tomorrow i messed up i always do always have done always will
27:03don't do that no it's true i messed up with myself and my kids it was only a few hours ago i wanted
27:10him to be locked up in here and then i'm kicking him out and i'm sitting here worrying where he is
27:13no wonder he hates me i wouldn't know
27:17do you know you're a brilliant mum cat
27:21yeah right
27:22he doesn't hate you he hates me
27:26you know i didn't go to spain to help hayley it was someone else someone else who needed help but
27:40i lost her again
27:45who
27:46zoe
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