- 2 months ago
The Gender Shuffle is a hilarious musical comedy about a student who disguises himself to sneak into an all-girls college. Packed with crazy campus antics, unexpected romance, and classic Hollywood charm, this film delivers laughter and fun in every scene.
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Short filmTranscript
00:00THE END
03:04Hey, Tiger, you're out of step.
03:12Hey, Tiger, you're out of step.
03:24Hey, Tiger, you're out of step.
03:26Hey, Tiger, you're out of step.
03:32I'm a chap with a chip on my shoulder.
03:36When anyone looks at you.
03:54I'm a chap with a chip on my shoulder.
03:57When anyone looks at you.
03:59How my muscles swell in the throes of jealousy.
04:05I may not be six feet two.
04:08Having Samson's hair is true.
04:11But I'm a chap with a chip on my shoulder.
04:14When anyone looks at you.
04:18That's it, ma'am.
04:20And the audience gave him a great big hand, too.
04:22Of course, for the boys, it was just another show.
04:24But for Christian, it was great publicity.
04:26Empty.
04:27That's very interesting, Mr. Holden.
04:29Pardon?
04:30Coming from a newspaper man.
04:32What?
04:33I'll have no cheap, undignified publicity at Marbrin.
04:36But it isn't undignified, Auntie.
04:38I can't understand why we don't have more students.
04:41Well, it's because our girls are...
04:43Well, men won't even come to our proms.
04:46Sure, you need regular girls.
04:47Not a lot of petunia putters.
04:49Girls with zip.
04:50Let me remind you both...
04:52That through the study of nature...
04:54My girls develop well-rounded minds.
04:57Minds they can live with the rest of their lives.
05:00But, Auntie, a girl doesn't want to live with a mind.
05:03She wants to live with a husband.
05:05Virginia!
05:06Uh, listen.
05:07Would you be willing to give away twelve scholarships?
05:09To twelve unusual girls?
05:11Well?
05:12If it would help my school?
05:15Yes.
05:16It will.
05:19I hope so.
05:20But I wonder...
05:21You don't have to wonder any longer.
05:23There they are.
05:24You need girls like that.
05:25Look them over.
05:26There's the watermelon queen, the pumpkin queen, the orange queen, the lemon queen, the strawberry queen.
05:30Millions of them.
05:32What lovely tomatoes.
05:34Why is she called the tomato queen?
05:36Because she grew them herself.
05:38That's how she won the title.
05:40Really?
05:41Mm.
05:42She's a very pretty girl, too.
05:44Empty.
05:45Sure.
05:46This queen's like her all over this country.
05:48We could pick twelve and give them memberships and scholarships to Mar Brin.
05:52Yes, Auntie.
05:53And they'll all be so outstanding.
05:55Well, it doesn't seem beneath the dignity of Mar Brin.
06:01We could call them the girls most likely to succeed.
06:06That's swell.
06:07Now, all we need is some quick notoriety.
06:08Enough to get...
06:09Soriety?
06:10But dripping with dignity, like a public announcement.
06:12You know, the way Harvard lampooned Hollywood.
06:15Let me think.
06:16Let me think.
06:20I've got it.
06:23We'll pick on the men least likely to succeed.
06:25Do you mean those mentally undernourished males at Quinston, cavorting as girls?
06:30The Zeta boys!
06:31Great, Auntie!
06:32I mean, pardon me.
06:33Write an article for your paper about them, and spread it on thick.
06:36Call them dumbbells.
06:37Call them anything you like, and I'll see if the press picks it up.
06:39Now, make them look ridiculous, and we'll head the article, men least likely to succeed.
06:44But do you think we should?
06:46Perhaps they will succeed.
06:47Oh, don't be silly.
06:48Everybody knows that Quinston men don't succeed.
06:52They inherit.
07:04Hey, fellas.
07:05Get a load of this.
07:06Can you imagine that?
07:07Some heck girls' college is putting us on the pan.
07:10Where's Henry?
07:11I'm coming, mother.
07:14Now, look, we know you're the world's greatest dramatic actor.
07:19But this is serious.
07:20Quit hamming, will you?
07:21Listen.
07:22Girls, are you interested in horticulture?
07:24Perhaps you will be one of this season's festival queens to win a scholarship to Marbrin.
07:28Send us your pictures and credentials.
07:30They're just taking a crack at us to advertise their scholarship award.
07:33And we've got to do something about it.
07:35That's right.
07:36Yeah!
07:37Well, I know what Gary Cooper would say.
07:39He'd, uh...
07:40He'd say, uh...
07:41I, uh...
07:42I don't know how you people do things here, but...
07:45Well, uh...
07:47Well, back where I come from, we act.
07:50Yeah.
07:51Now, uh...
07:52Now, wouldn't it be too bad if this scheme of theirs should backfire some way?
07:56Yeah!
07:57Backfire!
07:58What's on your mind?
08:00Why, uh...
08:01Why, some way to turn the tables.
08:04On account of we won't let ourselves be treated that-a-way.
08:07That's it.
08:08And we've had plenty of experience.
08:10We all just finished impersonating girls.
08:13Suppose one of the Marbrin candidates turns out to be a boy.
08:18Then one of us would go to Marbrin as a contest winner.
08:25And you, Henry...
08:26You and me are great at invitations.
08:28Mm-hmm.
08:29Oh, no, not me.
08:30I only impersonate men.
08:31Well, get a pack of cards and we'll cut for it.
08:33That was a great idea, Bob.
08:36Do you think it's possible?
08:37Oh, wouldn't that be something?
08:39Gee.
08:40Can you imagine being in a girl's school?
08:43Huh?
08:44Oh!
08:45I don't want to go.
08:46I'll frame him.
08:47You will think of something dirty, Mr. Bergen.
08:49You always do.
08:50Yes, but what?
08:51He's the one to go.
08:52Well, give him the business.
08:53Give him the business.
08:54Now, if I were in your place, I'd certainly...
08:55Charlie, nothing crooked.
08:56Why, Mr. Bergen, I'm a man of high honor.
08:58How could you even...
08:59Charlie answer my question.
09:00Yes, but you don't, Charlie.
09:01Oh, well, Charlie, oh, well...
09:02Charlie, oh, well...
09:03Oh, well...
09:04Uh, yes, I see.
09:05And besides...
09:07You got a deck of cards, haven't you?
09:21I don't know if I'm in my house, I'd...
09:24Ah, yes, I see.
09:25And besides, you got a deck of cards, haven't you?
09:31We'll fake a swell picture of a girl with her arms full of flowers,
09:34which naturally she grew herself.
09:36You know, the beauty type...
09:37Well, uh, we're willing to take our chances.
09:41And, uh, Bob, as president of the fraternity,
09:44I think it's only right that you take the first card.
09:46Oh, well, there's no...
09:48Yeah, and one who gets the first ace goes.
09:50First ace?
09:51Yeah.
09:52Agreed?
09:53Right.
09:54First ace.
09:55Go.
09:56Take your pick.
09:57Well...
09:58I'm afraid.
09:59Yeah.
10:00It's kind of important, you know.
10:02Well, uh, let's make it two out of three.
10:05Oh, no, no, no.
10:06You won and you go.
10:07As queen of the flowers.
10:08Gee.
10:09Madame.
10:10And more Brent expects you to do a good job.
10:12And we know you won't let us down.
10:13Oh, I'm hooked.
10:14Well, that's all right, Bob.
10:16I'm not sure if you're a queen of the flowers.
10:18I'm not sure if you're a queen of the flowers.
10:19I'm not sure if you're a queen of the flowers.
10:21I'm not sure if you're a queen of the flowers.
10:23I'm not sure if you're a queen of the flowers.
10:25Oh, that's all right, Bob.
10:26After all, it should be right up your alley.
10:28Ah.
10:29Hey!
10:30Hey, look!
10:31Ace.
10:32Ace.
10:33Ace.
10:34Ace.
10:35Ace.
10:36Ace.
10:37Ace.
10:38Ace.
10:39Ace.
10:40Ace.
10:41Ace.
10:42Ace.
10:43Ace.
10:44Ace.
10:45Ace.
10:46Ace.
10:47Ace.
10:48Ace.
10:49Ace.
10:50Ace.
10:51Ace.
10:52Ace.
10:53Ace.
10:54Ace.
10:55and all queens spinach the tobacco queen just to be an all-american girl isn't she beautiful
11:03what a lovely turkey give me the girl and i'll give you the bird well that's satisfactory
11:10i never realized there were so many lovely girls with such amazing talents listen there's only
11:16only 11 here we need one more well we have fruits and vegetables flowers must be represented
11:25i'll take this one queen of the flowers bobby dubois that's a very interesting face that's fine
11:34auntie don't call me auntie i'm sorry but what i was going to say was uh with all these pretty
11:40girls you'll have to relax a little and let some boys on the campus never no men on the campus during
11:45school hours not while i'm president of marverine well i'm a man you're safe
11:55i don't know but it sure wasn't when we were helping him into her clothes
12:15let go of me will you i'm not gonna run away
12:18the fraternity will never forget this it was your idea and you're the only one that could do it
12:23make mar brin look like a sucker yeah sucker is right and i'm it and i'm not gonna go through it
12:27oh yes
12:30don't trip again there dearie or we'll give you the words watch your little temper oh you can't back
12:44out now besides you look like ginger rogers more or less and think of all the fun you'll have yeah
12:49fun i'll probably land in jail oh now wouldn't that be too bad now remember you're doing this for
12:56that must be she there yes sir yeah and a honey
13:17it occurred in here every night miss bobby de wolf from quinston community queen of the flowers
13:25welcome to marverine special huh now don't forget keep that bear tone trap ears shut pretend like you
13:32got a sore throat or something come come mr wolf gotta be going oh maybe better kiss your friends
13:37goodbye huh goodbye dear there we go now we're off my goodness but you do have a lot of boyfriends
13:49just brothers just brothers
13:53my my
13:58all aboard
14:00oh hello honey hello here you are right up here at number two now listen
14:05i want you to get a good night's rest and take care of that throat bobby if i may call you that
14:11uh honey you know you're different than these other girls around here
14:16oh you go
14:19let me help you up oh no you don't
14:22i'll get a letter yes sir
14:35oh
14:54oh early to bed and early to rise that surely applies to me
15:00don't have to count sheep to put me to sleep it's easy as a b c
15:08when i rise and open my eyes don't need an alarm clock's chime
15:14believe it or not i'm up like a shot when it's past my dreamin' time
15:22i'm up at the crack of dawn whistling
15:27i'm up at the crack of dawn whistling
15:41singing
15:43singing
15:43have have to
15:44never saw the sky look quite so blue after dreaming all night of you when i wake
15:51i wake with your kiss with your kiss on my lips all my cares are in a total eclipse
16:01i'm up with a cheery yarn
16:02i'm up at the crack of dawn whistling
16:08all your sweet and racist thing
16:10i'm so a whistle and sing cause there isn't a thing that i lack at the crack of dawn
16:16i'm up at the crack of dawn whistling
16:19singing
16:21i'm up at the crack of dawn whistling
16:30singing
16:34da da da da da da never saw the sky look quite so blue after dreaming all night of you when i wake
16:42eyes are waking with your kiss on my lips all my cares are in a total eclipse
16:52i'm up with a cheery yarn whistling
16:57singing
16:58oh daddy all your sweet embraces linger on
17:02a whistle and sing there isn't a thing
17:04a lack at the crack of dawn
17:09whistling
17:12singing
17:14cheerful as the sunbeams peeping through
17:17after dreaming all night of you
17:20we're up at the crack of dawn
17:22whistling
17:24singing
17:27never saw the sky look quite so blue after dreaming all night of you
17:32you
17:33i'm up with a
17:49All your phrases linger long,
17:51Roll the whistle and sing.
17:53All bricks.
17:53Shut up, shut up, the whistle and sing.
17:55All bricks.
17:56And relax at the crack of dawn.
17:59All bricks.
18:12Come, come, dearly, we're here now.
18:14Coming, coming.
18:19Let's go.
18:49And now, girls, to your dormitory assignments.
18:51And I hope you'll all be very happy at Marbury's.
18:53Well, I'll be seeing you all.
18:55Or will I?
18:57Now, Bobby dear, come with me.
18:59We're very much concerned about this throat of yours.
19:01Oh, not that door, my dear.
19:03That leads to the basement.
19:05The one opposite.
19:07Do we feel like sharing a room,
19:09or would we rather be alone?
19:11Alone, please.
19:13It's a very nice little room right next to mine.
19:15Do we feel well enough to stay up here?
19:17Or would we rather go right to bed?
19:19Oh, to bed.
19:21Of course, if you'd rather,
19:23we can send you up to the infirmary for a complete examination.
19:25Oh, no, no.
19:27I, uh, I'm just a little hoarse.
19:29Of course.
19:31We do sound more like a mule.
19:33I feel more like a jackass.
19:39Gosh.
19:41Boy, I'm gonna get out of here.
19:43Ah.
19:45Ah.
19:53Oh, goodness me, Bobby.
19:54What are you doing?
19:55Well, uh, my throat is cold.
19:57I'm, I'm just keeping it warm.
19:59Oh, is that all?
20:01Well, look, do something for me, will you?
20:03I just can't seem to do anything with these.
20:05Fix them for me, please.
20:06Well, what do you want me to do with this?
20:09Well, just fix my hair, silly.
20:11Say, you know what?
20:13I met a Zeta at Midwest over the phone.
20:15Gee, he sounded grand.
20:17He asked me for a date Saturday night.
20:19He has a friend.
20:20Wanna come?
20:21Well, we could sneak out of here, I betcha.
20:23Mm-hmm.
20:24Mm-hmm.
20:25Mm-hmm.
20:26I know how those Zetas work.
20:27Well, you do have to be quick, but, oh, boy, it sure is fun.
20:30Well, goodbye now.
20:31Goodbye.
20:32You look very lovely.
20:33Goodbye.
20:34I'm Virginia Collins.
20:35I'm Virginia Collins.
20:36Welcome to Marvren.
20:37Is there anything I can do for you?
20:38I hear you have a pretty sore throat.
20:39Yes, very precious.
20:40I don't know how those Zetas work.
20:41I don't know how those Zetas work.
20:43Well, you do have to be quick, but, oh, boy, it sure is fun.
20:45Well, goodbye now.
20:46Goodbye.
20:47You look very lovely.
20:48Goodbye.
20:55I'm Virginia Collins.
20:56Welcome to Marvren.
20:57Is there anything I can do for you?
21:00I hear you have a pretty sore throat.
21:02Yes, very pretty.
21:04I mean, yes, it's very sore.
21:07Have you gargled?
21:09What on earth do you have here?
21:11It's just sort of, well, just laundry.
21:15Oh.
21:16Well, I came to tell you about the staying over by the bell tower.
21:19Too bad you can't come because of your throat.
21:21Oh, it feels much better.
21:23Well, if you do come, be quiet.
21:24It's against the rules, and Andy doesn't like it.
21:27Well, I'm awfully sorry about your throat,
21:29and I can understand why you want to be alone.
21:31But it's too bad because we were supposed to be roommates.
21:34Uh-huh.
21:35Uh-huh.
21:55What on earth are you doing?
21:57Oh, oh, just, just breaking in a new pair of pajamas.
22:00Oh, naughty, naughty with your throat.
22:03To bed with you.
22:04Come.
22:05Oh, no.
22:06Oh, yes, yes.
22:07You're in very serious condition.
22:09Oh.
22:10Now, let me tuck you in.
22:13Shall I rub your chest?
22:16Oh, no.
22:17Oh, no.
22:18Oh, no.
22:19Everything is so messy.
22:22Don't you dare get out of that bed, young lady.
22:38Uh-huh.
22:48Dirty clothes.
22:50Dirty clothes around here.
22:52Look, what is this?
22:54Well, these is men's pants. What they doing here?
22:56They ain't got no business here.
22:58And a man's coat?
23:00Well, where'd these things come from?
23:03Uh-oh, here's his shoes.
23:05I'm gonna call Miss Matilda and tell her all about this.
23:11Hello? Uh, Miss Matilda?
23:14There's a man's clothes done come down this chute.
23:17Uh, what, ma'am?
23:19Uh-uh.
23:21Uh-uh, no, no, ma'am.
23:23I'm sure, of course I'm sure.
23:25These here clothes ain't made out of no organdy.
23:28Uh-uh, no, ma'am.
23:30Uh, excuse me, Miss Matilda.
23:32I must have left the washing machine going.
23:33At least I hope so, I did.
23:38Uh, Miss Matilda, as I was saying, there was a man's shoes.
23:40Uh-uh, Miss Matilda, as I was saying, there was a man's shoes.
23:55There was shoes, but they must have walked off by the set.
23:58Uh, listen, Miss Matilda, there's something going on here that ain't the way I lights it.
24:02Now the ironers are going.
24:05My, my, Miss Matilda, it must be my nerves.
24:09Uh-uh, hold a while while I turns off the ironer.
24:13No, ma'am, I ain't crazy.
24:15Miss Matilda, did y'all ever find me?
24:17No, ma'am.
24:19I ain't crazy.
24:20Miss Matilda, did y'all ever find me?
24:22Uh-uh.
24:23Uh-uh.
24:24Uh-uh.
24:25Uh-uh.
24:26Uh-uh.
24:27Uh-uh.
24:28Uh-uh.
24:29Uh-uh.
24:30Uh-uh.
24:31Uh-uh.
24:32Yes, ma'am.
24:33Did y'all ever find you a hoodie or a collar?
24:34I think he's here or somebody's here.
24:35Yes, son.
24:36I goes to cut the, the ironer off and the shirt and the shoes is gone.
24:41Yes, ma'am.
24:42It was just like this, see?
24:43I goes over to the ironers and cut it off and the shirt's gone, and then I goes to the washing machine and the shoes is gone.
24:50Ah, the thing is haunted!
24:53Listen, tell me before you ex-wash lady leaves here, y'all better come down here and get these pants.
24:58Go ahead, now you can't stay in this place no longer.
25:00I go crazy. I just can't stay here.
25:03Oh, this is awful. Now, you're going to the washing machine and going to...
25:11I've never seen a break like this.
25:13Mr. Dilley, it's not Mr. Dilley.
25:15Oh, yeah, I told they caught me.
25:17Oh, Mr. Dilley, come give me please.
25:19Mr. Dilley.
25:21What is going on in here? Are you crazy?
25:23What on earth is wrong?
25:25Now, what's all this talk about pants? Where are they?
25:28I don't know where they is, but I sure know where they ain't.
25:31What is the matter with you?
25:32There ain't nothing the matter with me. This here place is haunted.
25:35First the shirt and the shoes goes by itself, then the washing machine,
25:38and the iron goes by itself, then the pants go by itself.
25:41Now, I'm going by myself. Goodbye, Miss Matilda.
25:45Out of the silence, come and cling to me.
25:55Out of the silence, come and bring to me.
26:07That feeling of resentment when you're near.
26:16And that feeling of resentment will disappear.
26:31Out of the silence, come and cling to me.
26:37Out of the silence, come and bring to me
26:46That feeling of contentment when you're near
26:54And that feeling of resentment will disappear
27:02When out of the silence comes the sound of your voice
27:14My heart goes leaping, I can't help but rejoice
27:22I'm up in heaven from the bottom of the sea
27:34When out of the silence you come to me
27:44Out of the silence comes the sound of your voice
27:56And I will be there, I can't help but rejoice
28:02I'm up in heaven from the bottom of the sea
28:08I'm up in heaven from the bottom of the sea
28:18When out of the silence you come to me
28:32Out of the silence comes the sound of your voice
28:42My heart goes leaping, I can't help but rejoice
28:50I'm up in heaven from the bottom of the sea
29:02When out of the silence you come to me
29:12Out of the silence you come to me
29:32Girls, we'd better hurry! Miss Latilla's coming!
29:34Back to the dormitories, girls! Hurry! Back to the dormitories!
29:38Come on!
29:44What are you doing here?
29:46I came to see you, but right now I'm holding the bell cord
29:48Quiet or she'll hear you
29:50I never saw you in my life before
29:54Well, I've seen you
29:56I want to help you with this presentation
29:58My name's Bob Shepherd
30:00You see, I'm interested in a way through, through Bobby DeWolf
30:02Oh
30:04Oh, that is just professional
30:06I taught her to sing and dance
30:08Confidentially, though, I don't like her much
30:10Not after I saw you, Virginia
30:12How did you know my name?
30:14Oh, I know a lot of things
30:16Say, say, would you mind holding this just for a minute?
30:20Careful now, it's heavy
30:22Now, you know, you can't let go of that
30:26Or the bell will ring and wake up the whole town
30:28And the old girl will hear it
30:30And come and find us here together
30:32What's the matter with you?
30:34You aren't going, are you?
30:36No, no, no, no, just trying to resist temptation
30:38You see, there's a little red man with horns behind me
30:40Agging me on
30:42Pushing me with his pitchfork
30:44Shoving me forward, forward
30:46Like this
30:48I don't see him
30:50Well, he's there
30:58Now, was that nice?
31:00Elegant
31:02Well, wait
31:03I mean
31:04Perhaps I'd like to get in on this myself
31:08Oh, lady
31:10Now, you can hold it for the rest of the night
31:14What a dirty trick
31:16Well, goodbye, Bob
31:18Listen, if you leave, so help me
31:19I'll let go of this rope
31:20You can let go any time
31:21That bell hasn't worked in 14 years
31:30Boy, how do you like that, huh?
31:32It's terrific
31:34Gee
31:36Glamorous addition
31:38To more Brim's Fall Festival
31:40Get a load of that guy
31:42He's doing all right
31:44Good morning
31:45Good morning
31:46Well, it looks like all our little girls are as busy as be...
31:48Good morning, Mr. Holden
31:50You know, we're gonna rehearse our presentation in here
31:52Is that so?
31:53Well, girls, are we all ready?
31:56Oh, Mr. Holden, do you really think these spots mean anything?
31:58I don't know, but I called the doctor
32:00You wouldn't get spots at a time like this
32:02Has anybody seen Bobby?
32:04I'm worried about her she was out all night
32:06Well, don't say anything
32:07Keep it quiet
32:08Hello, fellas
32:09Look, fellas, be reasonable, can't you?
32:11I know I promised but I've fallen in love with the girl
32:13She's like orchids covered with dew
32:15Like... oh, like moonlight and violins
32:18She's...
32:19Hey, now, wait a minute, Bob
32:21You know, I promise
32:22But I'm falling in love with the girl
32:23She's like orchids covered with dew
32:25Like... oh, like moonlight and violins
32:27She's...
32:28Hey, now, wait a minute, Bob
32:30I'll tell you what you're on
32:31Hey, now, wait a minute, Bob.
32:33Hey, fellas.
32:35Looks like love has crossed us up.
32:37Hey, we can't let them quit now.
32:39Now, look, you took an oath in love or no love,
32:41we can't let you get out of it.
32:43We'll send some of the local Zeta boys over
32:45to keep him from walking out.
32:47Right.
32:49Now, listen, Bob.
32:51Wait a minute.
32:53It's only me, Virginia.
32:55I'll be there in a minute.
32:57I gotta quit. I'm caught in the hothouse. Spent the night here.
32:59That up.
33:01Wait a minute, Virginia.
33:09I thought Bobby was...
33:11Oh, look, Virginia, I know it looks bad,
33:13but, well, just trust me, huh?
33:15And I believed you last night.
33:17Oh, now.
33:19For Bobby's sake, you'd better get out of here right now.
33:21Virginia.
33:25Are you sure those spots mean what you said?
33:27You can't quarantine the whole school, you know.
33:29a presentation.
33:30There's nothing I can do.
33:31Miss Bunny has measles.
33:33Must be put to bed at once.
33:35And the school is under quarantine.
33:37It's all right.
33:38It's too bad.
33:39It's just too bad.
33:41Poor kid.
33:43It's too bad.
33:44It's too bad.
33:45It's too bad.
33:46It's too bad.
33:47It's too bad.
33:48It's too bad.
33:49It's too bad.
33:50It's too bad.
33:51It's too bad.
33:52It's too bad.
33:53It's too bad.
33:54It's too bad.
33:55The very first time we try something like this.
33:58Well, couldn't we postpone the presentation?
34:00No, no, you can't do that.
34:01We spawned a publicity angle.
34:03We just have to make the best of it.
34:05I just knew something like this would happen.
34:08I'm sorry, Andy.
34:09There must be something we can do.
34:11There it is.
34:12You can have your presentation.
34:14Have it in here.
34:15You know, you can't catch measles from behind glass.
34:18Who are you, young man?
34:19I'm qualified to stage your presentation.
34:21I figured a presentation to my own.
34:23I know what to do and how to do it.
34:25Now, we can move all these ferns and plants out of one end
34:28and have sort of a stage.
34:29Why, we might even make costumes out of the plants.
34:31Yeah, this is the place, all right.
34:34Well, what do we do now?
34:36Oh, now, look.
34:37Our Zeta brothers at Quinston say the guy's here disguised as a girl.
34:41We just keep our eyes peeled and when we find him, we give him the work.
34:45See?
34:46Get a load of that over there.
34:49Yeah.
34:51Well, how do we get in?
34:56Huh?
34:57Oh, oh, get in.
34:59Well, here, I got it.
35:00We'll grab one of these.
35:01Come on, you get one.
35:03Come on.
35:04Wait a minute.
35:05I can't get in that way.
35:06Ooh.
35:07Get in.
35:08Get in.
35:09Get in.
35:10Get in.
35:11Get in.
35:12Get in.
35:13Hey, we should quit playing around.
35:16Say, we've been here three days and we haven't found that phony dame yet.
35:31I know.
35:32I know.
35:33I know.
35:34I've been trying, though, ain't I?
35:35Yeah.
35:36Trying to make dates with them.
35:37Goodbye, now.
35:38Goodbye, Bobby.
35:39Hey, wait a minute.
35:40I got an idea.
35:41How are you, beautiful?
35:42Oh, hello.
35:43Go on.
35:44Get out of here, will you?
35:45Come on.
35:46Get out of here, will you?
35:47I'm going to go.
35:48Now, you've got three days and we haven't found that phony dame yet.
35:50I know.
35:51I know.
35:52I know.
35:53I've been trying, though, ain't I?
35:54Yeah.
35:55Trying to make dates with them.
35:56Goodbye, now.
35:57Goodbye, Bobby.
35:58Hey, wait a minute.
35:59I got an idea.
36:02How are you, beautiful?
36:03Oh, hello.
36:04Go on.
36:05Get out of here, will you?
36:06Uh, Bobby.
36:07Yes?
36:08Why don't you like me?
36:09Oh, I like you.
36:10But I've seen you with the other girls.
36:12You play too rough.
36:13Uh, Bobby.
36:14Yes?
36:15Can you keep a secret?
36:16Uh-huh.
36:17Well, uh, I, I had to do that.
36:19You know, be a little rough with me.
36:20Uh-huh.
36:21I had to do that.
36:22You know, be a little rough with me.
36:24Uh, Bobby.
36:25Uh, Bobby.
36:26Yes?
36:27Can you keep a secret?
36:28Uh-huh.
36:29Well, uh, I, I had to do that.
36:31You know, be a little rough with me.
36:33I won't be a little rough with the girls.
36:35Oh.
36:36You should learn to control yourself.
36:38Oh, no.
36:39It's nothing like that.
36:40But, Bobby.
36:41Yes?
36:42You know, there's a man here disguised as a girl.
36:45And I gotta find him.
36:46A man?
36:47Yeah.
36:54Will you please get out of here?
36:56Go on.
36:57Scram.
36:58Oh, oh.
36:59Oh.
37:00Oh.
37:01Oh.
37:02Where am I?
37:03Well, you killed with me, baby.
37:04Oh, dear.
37:05Oh.
37:06Oh.
37:07Oh.
37:08Oh.
37:09Oh.
37:10Oh.
37:11Oh.
37:12Oh.
37:13What's the matter, Bobby?
37:14I, I won't hurt you.
37:15That's what I'm afraid of.
37:17Will you scram your cramp in my style?
37:20Yeah.
37:21I get it.
37:22Oh, Bobby.
37:23You're such a lovely girl.
37:24Oh, Bobby.
37:25Oh.
37:26Oh, Bobby.
37:27Oh.
37:28Oh, Bobby.
37:29You played so right.
37:30Oh, no.
37:31You don't.
37:32Oh, no, Bobby.
37:33Now, cut it out.
37:34Oh, I know you're tired.
37:35Oh.
37:36Bobby.
37:37Now, wait a minute.
37:38Oh, Bobby.
37:39Oh.
37:40Hey.
37:41Bobby.
37:42Oh.
37:43Bobby.
37:44Oh.
37:45Bobby.
37:46Oh.
37:47That'll teach you not to play fast and loose with me.
37:50Oh, Bobby.
37:51Let me up.
37:52Please let me up.
37:53Oh.
37:54I don't see why you have to be so rough.
38:04Tiki.
38:05Oh, Bobby.
38:06Tiki, Tiki.
38:07Oh.
38:08Tiki, Tiki.
38:09Oh.
38:10Please let me up, won't you, Bobby?
38:11Will you promise to be a gentleman?
38:13Oh, yeah.
38:14Bobby, I, I promise anything.
38:16All right now, but remember your promise.
38:18Oh.
38:21Oh.
38:22Oh.
38:23Oh.
38:24Oh.
38:25You little dickens.
38:26Now I got you.
38:27Oh, no, no, no, no.
38:28Oh, no, no, no.
38:29Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey.
38:30When I, when I...
38:31What's the matter with you?
38:32What do you always keep coming around for?
38:34Just when I get going good, didn't I?
38:36Yes.
38:37Oh, my God.
38:38Oh, my God.
38:39Oh, my God.
38:40Oh, my God.
38:41Oh, my God.
38:42Oh, my God.
38:43Oh, my God.
38:44Oh, my God.
38:45Oh, my God.
38:46Oh, my God.
38:47Oh, my God.
38:48Oh, my God.
38:49What's this?
38:50Don't touch it.
38:51That's a Diania mascapula.
38:52My, my.
38:53Do tell.
38:54Venus trap.
38:55Meat-eating plant to you.
38:56Mm.
38:57Poor darling, it's hungry.
38:58I've been so busy,
38:59I haven't had time to feed it.
39:00It's time to paint it.
39:26Virginia, please. I want to explain.
39:29Explanations are not necessary.
39:31Oh, but Bob Shepard is...
39:32Please, you're only making matters worse.
39:34I am grateful to Bob Shepard for what he's done for our friend,
39:37but it ends there.
39:38Get into your costume. There's the overture.
39:40Virginia.
39:52Hurry up, operator, will you please?
39:56Hello, Quinston? Zeta House?
39:58Hello, you lugs.
39:59Thanks to you, I lost a girl.
40:01Yeah.
40:03Yeah, yeah.
40:05Yeah, I know.
40:07Am I?
40:08Of course I'm going through with it.
40:09I'll get revenge and plenty.
40:11Wait till you see the papers.
40:12Where's Bobby?
40:14Probably in there with her boyfriend.
40:16Well, you better get on the stage or follow this first number.
40:18Quick, quick, quick, quick, quick.
40:20Come on, we're ready.
40:21Yeah, all right.
40:22Okay.
40:23Great start.
40:24But what a finish.
40:25Mm-hmm.
40:26Tell your best photographers to get up overhead.
40:27It'll make a sensational finale shot.
40:28Now, go ahead.
40:29Come...
40:32Mm-hmm.
40:33Oh, my God.
40:34Come on.
40:35Huh?
40:36I love you.
40:37How are you?
40:38Thank you, do you want me to see me?
40:39Have you not ever seen a wonderful man?
40:44Oh, my God.
40:46Oh, my God.
40:47Oh, my God.
40:48Oh, my God.
40:49Oh, my God.
40:50Oh, my God.
40:51Oh, my God, I would like to die.
40:54Oh, my God.
40:55Oh!
40:56Virginia, listen, I want to explain.
40:58I was going to forgive you, but a moment after she,
41:00while you were with her,
41:02what are you planning to do to this show?
41:04Nothing, Virginia, it's just a...
41:06That's my music.
41:08Our peaceful countryside
41:10Is lonely as can be
41:12Someone I shall mention
41:14Marriage theater
41:16Is lonely as can be
41:18Someone I shall mention
41:20Marriage theater
41:22Someone I shall mention
41:24Marriage the attention
41:26Of the men
41:28Who write our history
41:32The poor farmer's daughter
41:36She's wasting her glamour and charm
41:38Oh, Dobbin and a plow
41:40And a piggy and a cow
41:42Are the only ones left on the farm
41:44Oh, the poor farmer's daughter
41:46She once had a bow on each arm
41:48They took it on the lam
41:50Went to train for Uncle Sam
41:52And they left her alone on the farm
41:54Her papa says the crop
41:56For the year is the top
41:57But that doesn't ease her slumber
41:59What good is a crop
42:01When you beat one a hop
42:02You get rumba
42:04With an old cucumber
42:07Oh, the poor farmer's daughter
42:09She really has cause for alarm
42:12Old Dobbin and a plow
42:13And a piggy and a cow
42:15Are the only ones left on the farm
42:17The poor farmer's daughter
42:18She's wasting her glamour and charm
42:32Oh, boy, what a job
42:34I'm gonna get myself in a mess like this again
42:36Corsets, garters
42:38She once had a four on each arm
42:40She once had a four on each arm
42:41She once had a four on each arm
42:42She once had a four on each arm
42:44They took it on the lammer
42:45She ever get home
42:46Why, auntie
42:51It's going great, isn't it?
42:53Yeah
42:54But I better tell you
42:55Bunny got out
42:56Who?
42:57Bunny
42:58Bunny
42:59What's out?
43:00Bunny
43:01Where?
43:02Where?
43:03Why?
43:04Darn
43:07When you see
43:12It's a double cross
43:13Bobby
43:14Bob
43:15He's she
43:16She's he?
43:17It's a man loose in my school
43:18Let the photographer see him
43:19We're sunk
43:20Yes
43:25Bunny
43:26Catch her
43:27Catch her
43:28When your feet wanna hop
43:29You can't rumble
43:31With an old cucumber
43:33Oh, poor farmer's daughter, she really had thought for alarm.
43:38Old goblin and a plow and a piggy and a cow are the only ones left on the farm.
43:54Grab a toe stool and park it, see the models from the farmer's market.
43:58You'll find the price within reason.
44:01Get a load of what's cooking this season.
44:07Number one on the style parade shops will soon be selling.
44:12Folk has named it Le Morte de Watermelon.
44:31Hi, Bobby.
44:33Oh, Bobby, I wanted to tell you something.
44:35Ah, go jump in the lake.
44:40Tiny! Tiny, I found him!
44:43That's him! That's him with those dresses on!
44:45Number two on the style parade, not by Schiaparelli.
44:50Get that cabbage around my lady's shoulder.
44:55Come here to trade some boys' heart in this lonely garret.
45:01Say, don't care with our sheep, shot, goose, a carrot.
45:05Come here to trade some boys' heart in this lonely garret.
45:17Say, don't care with our sheep, shot, goose, a carrot.
45:21Come with me. I've got a great idea.
45:27Now we offer a symphony, every note staccato.
45:33Our creation, temptation of tomato.
45:39Now here's one little ray for cop named to California.
45:44Get that rhythm, it's in the groove, it's a corny.
45:50Remember, my kids, the sitting down zeta trick on the last note of music.
45:53Now don't let me down.
45:54Okay.
46:15What's the meaning of this fool?
46:17Sorry. Awful sorry.
46:19Get out of here.
46:20You realize now there never has been a Bobby DeWolf.
46:22And, honey, don't worry about your show.
46:30We got you now.
46:31We got you now, Bobby.
46:32Old Dobby and a flower and a piggy and a cow
46:35Are the only ones left on the farm
46:37For the poor bunny's daughter
46:40She once had a forewater tour
46:42But they took it on the lam
46:44Come on, Bobby. We got you now.
46:46Bobby, you shouldn't be here. You've got the measles.
46:49Bunny.
46:51Measles.
46:52Measles.
46:53Ah!
46:54Ah!
46:55Ah!
46:56You can't rub the butter
46:58With an old cucumber
47:00Walkin' for a common darlin'
47:03We really have a flower along
47:06Dobby and a flower and a piggy and a cow
47:09Are the only ones left on the farm
47:12Are you happy with the show?
47:14Yes.
47:15But there's something I want to say to you.
47:16Yes.
47:17But there's something I want to say to you.
47:18Let's go.
47:20You won't.
47:21Wonderful.
47:22You did very good.
47:23Vinnie, cut the fuck off.
47:29I'm sorry you lost your revenge because of me.
47:31But you should have a public apology for Zeta.
47:33I'm sorry you lost your revenge because of me, but you should have a public apology for Zeta.
47:48Oh, getting you is enough for me.
47:51But don't you think your friends will be angry when they see those publicity pictures?
47:54Oh, they'll understand.
47:56Boy, oh boy, how do you like that, huh?
48:05It's terrific.
48:06Gee.
48:26Gee, gee, gee, gee, gee, gee.
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