00:00Dear Mr. President, I understand that you want to take over Greenland.
00:05Let me tell you why that is a terrible idea.
00:08First of all, Greenland is an integrated part of Denmark, as you can clearly see on this map.
00:17And we even have an ice cream named after the indigenous people of Greenland.
00:22The giant is ******, as I'm pretty sure it soon will be called again.
00:27If you're worried about keeping Greenland safe and Russian free, don't worry.
00:32We have a couple of inspection ships. One can sail, one can shoot.
00:36Together it's almost like one real ship.
00:39We also have a fierce battalion of highly trained winter soldiers consisting of 12 men
00:45who are patrolling the only 16,000 km coastline of Greenland.
00:49Think of the Paw Patrol, but with puffy jackets.
00:52And it's a very serious name that they have this patrol.
00:56It's the serious patrol.
01:00Ooh, I love the doggie.
01:02Hi, hi, good day.
01:04Oh, okay.
01:06You hear that you won't rule out military action against us if we don't give you the keys to Greenland.
01:12But just remember, we are a member of NATO.
01:16If you attack us, you also have to come and help us.
01:19It will be a very confusing war.
01:21And also, I hope that you are aware that we will have a fully functioning military sometime before 2040.
01:31Think about that.
01:33And our countries have always been friends, and friends don't take each other's countries.
01:38Friends, they join forces and invade other countries for oil and money like the good old days.
01:45Afghanistan, remember? Good times, man.
01:47Most importantly, Greenland wants to be Danish because we have always treated them with the utmost respect.
01:53We have a long history of celebrating the rich and proud Greenlandic heritage.
01:58Little Peter, sukkertop, kavle og kravle.
02:03So, kom, spritten og Peter fik sin knæk.
02:07So, kom en dansk bitch, hent og sagst og...
02:11Fact is that some of my closest friends are from Greenland.
02:15I'm from America, Jonathan.
02:17And we're not friends.
02:19Wow.
02:21What a beautiful language.
02:23I'm so smart to you also, my friend.
02:27And they love our royal family.
02:32And they also love...
02:34Nah, maybe not this one.
02:36But...
02:40Who made this shit?
02:42So, all in all, Greenland is not for sale.
02:45But if you must have a Danish island, we have this one for you.
02:48Lola uses it.
02:50It's nice and central, and they have an endless supply of sugar beets.
02:55Delicious.
02:56Well...
02:57I'm off!
03:00Well, that's it for me, Mr. President.
03:02Home to Greenland!
03:04Yip, yip, yip, yip!
03:05Thank you!
03:06Then like, you got this ship!
03:17You've seen this ship here I skip!
03:22Thank you!
03:23Thank you, Nicky!
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