Bryan Kohberger Victims' Surviving Roommate Condemns 'Evil' Murderer At Sentencing Hearing

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Dylan Mortensen, a roommate of the victims of Bryan Kohberger, delivers her impact statement at Kohberger's sentencing hearing.

Transcript

00:00Thank you, Bethany, my appreciation for her courage, and I hope that she heals.

00:10Next is Dylan Mortensen.

00:11We're asking for some accommodations for Ms. Mortensen, and that she be allowed to sit in my seat.

00:16Sure.

00:30Dylan, just take your time, all right?

00:32Okay.

00:33Here we go.

00:55Sorry.

00:56I got it.

01:00Thank you, Your Honor.

01:11What happened that night changed everything.

01:14Because of him, for a beautiful, genuine, compassionate people were taken from this world for no reason.

01:32He didn't just take their lives.

01:40He took the light they carried into every room.

01:43He took away how they made everyone feel safe, loved, and full of joy.

01:52He took away the ability for me to tell them that I love them and that I'm so proud of them.

01:58He took away who they were becoming and the futures they were going to have.

02:06He took away birthdays, graduations, celebrations, and all the memories that we were supposed to make.

02:14All of it is gone and all the people who loved them are just left to carry that weight forever.

02:23He didn't just take them from the world.

02:26He took them from me, my friends, my people who felt like my home.

02:33The people I looked up to and adored more than anyone, he took away my ability to trust the world around me.

02:43What he did shattered me in places I didn't know could break.

02:48I was barely 19 when he did this.

02:52We had just celebrated my birthday at the end of September.

02:56I should have been figuring out who I was.

02:59I should have been having the college experience and starting to establish my future.

03:05Instead, I was forced to learn how to survive the unimaginable.

03:11I couldn't be alone.

03:16I had to sleep in my mom's bed because I was too terrified to close my eyes.

03:21Terrified that if I blinked, someone might be there.

03:26I made escape plans everywhere I went.

03:29If something happens, how do I get out?

03:32What can I use to defend myself?

03:34Who can I help?

03:37Then there are the panic attacks.

03:39The kind that slammed into me like a tsunami out of nowhere.

03:43I can't breathe.

03:46I can't think.

03:49I can't stop shaking.

03:56All I can do is scream because the emotional pain and the grief is too much to handle.

04:02My chest feels like escaping in.

04:07Sometimes I drop to the floor with my heart racing, convinced something is very wrong.

04:14It's far beyond anxiety.

04:17It's my body reliving everything over and over again.

04:22My nervous system never got the message that it is over, and it won't let me forget what

04:26he did to them.

04:29People call me strong.

04:31They say I'm a survivor, but I don't see what my new reality looks like.

04:37They don't see the hypervigilance, the exhaustion, the way I scan every room I enter, the way I flinch

04:46It's sudden sounds.

04:48They don't know how heavy it is to carry so much pain and still be expected to keep going, and that's because of him.

04:57He still parts me I may never get back.

05:01He took the version of me who didn't constantly ask, what if it happens again?

05:07What if next time I don't survive?

05:21He may have shattered parts of me, but I'm still putting myself back together.

05:27Piece by piece, I'm learning how to live in this new version of life.

05:31It is not easy.

05:34It hurts, but I'm still trying.

05:37And I'm not trying just for me, I'm trying for them, my friends.

05:44About a year ago, I had a dream about them.

05:48I got to say goodbye, and I told them I won't be able to see you again, so I need to tell

05:53you goodbye.

05:54They all kept asking why, and all I could say was, I can't tell you, but I have to.

06:01When I woke up, I felt shattered and heartbroken.

06:06But also strangely grateful, like maybe in some way that dream gave us the goodbye we never

06:11got.

06:13Still no dream can replace them, and no goodbye will ever feel finished.

06:20He is a hollow vessel, something less than human, a body without empathy, without remorse.

06:29He chose destruction.

06:31He chose evil.

06:32He feels nothing.

06:33He tried to take everything from me, my friends, my safety, my identity, my future.

06:45He took their lives, but I will continue trying to be like them to make them proud.

06:52Living is how I honor them.

06:54Speaking today is to help me find some sort of justice for them.

06:58And I will never let him take that from me.

07:01He may have taken so much from me, but he will never get to take my voice.

07:08He will never take the memories I had with them.

07:13He will never erase the love we shared, the laughs we had, or the way they made me feel

07:18seen and whole.

07:19Those things are mine, they are sacred, and he will never touch them.

07:26I get to feel sadness.

07:27I get to feel rage.

07:29I get to feel joy even when it's hard.

07:32I get to feel love even when it hurts.

07:34I get to live.

07:37And while I will still live with this pain, at least I get to live my life.

07:42He will stay here, empty, forgotten, and powerless.

07:46Jillian, thank you so much for your courage.

07:51I appreciate it.

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