Why Were You Tased?

Beasley Digital

Dave & Chuck the Freak talked about a couple stories in the news that involved people being tased so they went to the phones to hear from listeners about their taser experiences.

Transcript

00:00so let's head to the phones here the question is why were you tased one eight five five nine

00:09five four six nine six nine vince in detroit who tased you hey big ball is a little penis

00:15penis to you all right uh i bought a taser from my girlfriend and uh was joking around

00:24she ended up tasing me and she didn't know how to turn it off and she kept on tasing me like three

00:30or four different times i screamed like a little girl it hurt so bad i could not believe it how to

00:37turn it off she didn't know that okay you got a teacher how to turn it off number one uh two

00:42where did she tase you uh in my butt in your butt repeatedly in your butt yeah repeatedly did you

00:52wet yourself or defecate uh no i was close to it and then uh we had a couple buddies of mine over

00:59that ride harley's and stuff and they uh did it to me as well and it was everyone in your life

01:05tases you you need new friends you have to do that you have to tase your butt

01:10he's like a short of it is a fart and people's hair stand up it killed me it killed me i couldn't

01:19believe it wow you need new friends dude i need to decline that invitation

01:23sorry i'm busy can't do that last time i went you guys have 13 people tased the man's ass

01:34it's just a little crazy where would you want like where's the best place to get it if like is the

01:40butt a good place to get it i feel like it's meaty if you're going prongs i don't think so i thought the

01:45butt would have been a good spot but yeah last though the caller before last oh he said it was

01:48horrible yeah was it his butthole or no i don't think it was his butthole no least i think just

01:54his cheek oh yeah i don't think it's a lot of prongs butthole changes everything if one of those prongs

02:00like a new hope sit down your butthole oh my lord then you're that's that's first of all don't stand

02:06with your butt cheek spread open yeah you'd have to hit me in like the cheek if you hit me in each

02:12cheek i bet you could i bet you could fill me full about 12 million volts yeah and i wouldn't even

02:18be anywhere oh wow but then you start shooting lightning from your mouth right it turns into

02:23god's my ass cheeks can sustain electricity a lot of it wow you're quite a superhero uh let's go to

02:30jennifer in salem massachusetts hey jennifer how are you hi good how are you good how'd you good taste

02:35oh i was uh in chicago this was years ago i was in chicago and i was arrested because i had a

02:41warrant out for my arrest they put me in the front seat of a cop car and they didn't close the door

02:45all the way and i got out and ran and i had two fleas chasing me and they tased me in the back

02:50oh they got my two cops it was a good trip to chicago

02:54a little different than mine lovely memory you have fleeing from the police and being tased uh did it hurt

03:02did you wet yourself uh it hurt and i crapped my pants oh you did oh my god it's a trooper it's two

03:08confirmed traps oh wow uh rick's in tampa you did it to yourself rick

03:15accidentally yeah um what had happened was my dad had bought me a flashlight

03:21that had the tasing end on the end of it oh no oh that's bad he didn't tell me about that

03:27so he he put it on tase he said try that and i was touching the end of it

03:32and pushed the button on it and it zapped me oh my god did that hurt

03:37flashlight taser

03:39that's a terrible invention

03:41let me just see it here i can't see the lights

03:43the only thing worse is if they combine that with a fleshlight

03:48oh my god

03:50yeah there's some people there it is lisa comes up right away flashlight taser

03:55why don't you test that yeah i love that he's like a prankster dad he goes test it out

03:58see how light see how the light works i feel like that taser wouldn't hurt as bad as the prongs

04:04like i feel like that's like a modified version of those electric games yeah well those prongs got

04:08to bring it down because they're shooting it right into you yeah right it's not just on the outside

04:13here andy you want to use my pen

04:15you trickster you

04:19get your taser pen

04:22i didn't know you were a prankster

04:25ever since lisa got that taser pen you gotta be careful

04:30lisa got that goddamn taser pen i will not sit by her

04:33until she gets that thing out of here

04:36i pooped myself during the last show

04:38uh and on a regular line tito's in clear water

04:40hey tito

04:42hey how you guys doing

04:44good uh have you been tased

04:45uh i've been tased three times i'm a cop

04:49uh about 17 years so you have to get it

04:53uh in order to use it

04:54and uh it's not a pleasant experience i can tell you that

04:58did you release the hounds

05:00uh thank god i didn't release the hounds uh because you know you got your other buddies that

05:06uh work with you around and if you release the hounds then

05:09uh you're going to be dealing with some severe uh verbal punishment for probably the rest of your career

05:14yeah hold on sergeant diarrhea is here

05:16absolutely absolutely

05:18i'll tell you i think the worst thing i've uh experienced though is uh we had arrested a guy

05:25and uh he was a little squirrely guy

05:27i had to drive stun him and when we got him down on the ground

05:30i looked towards the taser and i was actually tasing his p-hole

05:34and uh oh my god oh my god scream and squeal

05:39tito i'm gonna ask you to recreate the sound of that p-hole scream

05:44yeah p-hole zap what's that like can you get how did it sound like

05:47i didn't get that high guys really

05:48it was bad yeah it was it was higher than that it was higher than that

05:54absolutely

05:56my voice is too rough

05:58like dolphin sex

06:02that's pretty cool you got a guy right in his p-hole though

06:05well not for him

06:06that's one for the books you know you can check that off

06:10oh my god

06:11that is you witnessed something special that day

06:13tito thanks for listening man you have a good day

06:15hey you too thanks guys appreciate it

06:18all right see ya

06:18oh my god that's nuts

06:20that's all i talk about if i was with him

06:22can you believe it

06:24he hit him right in his p-hole i've never seen anything like it

06:27i was not for 25 years the craziest thing i saw

06:30i saw a man get tased right in his p-hole

06:35lit him up like a little christmas tree

06:37that's probably the easiest way to lose the officer diarrhea nickname too

06:41if you put your pants in training

06:42just get somebody in the p-hole

06:43he's a bullseye with that thing

06:46that'd be the worst

06:47that's the worst spot right

06:48as a guy

06:49that's the worst spot you can get

06:51the worst thing i ever saw was a urethral tason

06:53when you say it like that

06:55that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

06:57that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

06:58that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

06:59that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:00that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:01that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:02that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:03that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:04that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:05that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:06that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:07that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:08that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:09that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:10that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:11that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

07:12that's the worst spot right in the p-hole

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