Marty Vs Pat Maroon In A Shootout Against Scott Darling

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Marty Mush | Marty vs.

Transcript

00:00Never lost the shootout when I was playing for the Blackhawks.

00:03Listen, Scott woke up looking for f***ing blood today.

00:07Come on!

00:09Here, Bambi's gonna score this one.

00:11Oh!

00:13We have a great episode of Martiverse coming for you right this second.

00:17It's all because of Twin Peaks.

00:19If you're looking for a headquarters to watch college football,

00:22professional football, some great wings, a great atmosphere,

00:26it's all at Twin Peaks.

00:28Twin Peaks has more than just sports, though.

00:30The best part is they have 29 draft beers,

00:33they have 30 different sauces for your wings,

00:35and you know you're all gonna want those sauces,

00:37the honey barbecue, the honey mustard, the garlic plum, all of that.

00:41Twin Peaks has it.

00:42And when all the sports are over, you're done,

00:44you're watching your fantasy players, you've won your fantasy game,

00:47your favorite team won,

00:49it goes into nighttime with their signature cocktails,

00:52their best, their drinks, their music, everything.

00:55This is the place to be on Saturdays, Sundays,

00:57any day of the week that you want to be there.

00:59Twin Peaks is the best.

01:01Shout-out to them for being in this video,

01:03shout-out for them being a sponsor,

01:05and you'll see me at Twin Peaks watching these games with everybody,

01:08eating wings with the best drinks.

01:10Shout-out Twin Peaks.

01:12Yeah, shout-out Scott.

01:14He's, uh...

01:16I'm babysitting this boy.

01:19He's definitely tying my shoes.

01:21I go, you tie it like a shoe?

01:23He goes, no, like a skate.

01:25I go, I don't know how to do that.

01:27I got to take them off before I go on, right?

01:29What do you mean?

01:30These.

01:31Yeah.

01:32Yeah.

01:33Have you ever, like, been in a hockey rink before?

01:35Yeah, yeah.

01:43Whoo!

01:44All right.

01:45All right.

01:49All right, this is bad.

01:51It's a little slippery, to be honest.

01:53This is how my shootout's going to go.

01:57I am down.

02:01Oh, sh...

02:06I got to be honest, I'm getting a little fucking tired.

02:08Let me tell you, my feet hurt already.

02:10I'm going to get tired if I keep doing this.

02:22Somebody's got a backhand.

02:25Ooh, doggy.

02:27Blackhawk's my fucking sideman.

02:37Good stop.

02:40Not bad.

02:41Let me get back.

02:42Let me get back.

02:45All right.

02:46All right.

02:47All right.

02:48Let me get back.

02:49Let me get back.

02:51All right.

02:52Not bad.

02:53That's not bad, actually.

02:55You got this.

02:56Welcome back to another Mardi Verse.

02:58My next challenge is NHL hockey.

03:02I'm here with three-time Stanley Cup...

03:04What do you call yourself?

03:05Winner?

03:06Champion?

03:07No.

03:08Stanley Cup what?

03:09Stanley Cup champ.

03:10Champ.

03:11Stanley Cup champion, Pat Maroon, with the Chicago Blackhawks.

03:16Now, how are we feeling?

03:17How are you feeling about me on skit?

03:18Pretty good?

03:19You look pretty good.

03:20Yeah, right?

03:21I'm not going to...

03:22You need to work on the stopping a little bit.

03:23Stopping's tough.

03:24It's the only thing that's tough.

03:25Hey, we're doing a shootout.

03:26That's fine.

03:27So it's me against Pat Maroon.

03:30We got Scott Darling in net.

03:32Hopefully, hopefully...

03:34Listen, he's playing in Japan this year,

03:36so we'll send him to Japan after we score a couple goals.

03:39And then...

03:40Japan might cut him.

03:41Yeah.

03:42Japan might cut him if I score on him.

03:44We're going to do 10 each.

03:45You go, I go, and then see who wins.

03:47All right.

03:48All right.

03:49Okay, you ready?

03:50One set.

03:51Let me get set.

03:52This guy goes, you ready?

03:54My feet are...

03:55All right.

03:59Spread your feet apart.

04:01How far?

04:02How are you supposed to get them back?

04:04See my knees?

04:06Bend your knees a little bit.

04:08You ready?

04:12He turned me around.

04:15All right, he goes first.

04:18I don't think...

04:19Oh, there he is.

04:20Look at him.

04:21There we go.

04:22How are you feeling, Scotty?

04:24A little scratched, but that's tough.

04:28Two years?

04:30I haven't skated in 10.

04:42How are we feeling, Scotty?

04:44Let's go.

04:45Let's do it.

04:46I don't think you guys are going to score, to be honest.

04:48Have you scored in a shootout before?

04:50No, never.

04:52I've only taken one attempt in my career.

04:54One attempt?

04:56That's unbelievable.

04:57Hey, I got to start somewhere.

04:59You picked the right guy for this.

05:01Fantastic.

05:02Let's go, bitches.

05:04Oh, heaven.

05:06Oh, I like that.

05:09Oh!

05:12That's one.

05:13I think you fucking missed a shot there.

05:16Go home, that's open.

05:17You can't miss.

05:18All right, here we go.

05:19Come on, sucker.

05:20Come on, buddy.

05:21I guarantee you he's going to hit me in the throat.

05:23Put it in, buddy.

05:25Bend your knees.

05:26Bend your knees.

05:30All right, over one.

05:31Over one.

05:33Oh, I feel good.

05:34I'm warmed up, Pat.

05:35You're fucked.

05:36You're fucked.

05:37You almost got there.

05:40Hey, Patrick Kane?

05:44Nope.

05:45All right.

05:47Here we go.

05:56Oh!

06:00Unbelievable.

06:01I'm scoring this shit.

06:04Fucking Patrick Kane here.

06:09That's a goal.

06:11That's an unbelievable shot.

06:13Put it on the ice.

06:14I still can't score.

06:15What, you missed it?

06:16Yeah.

06:17You missed.

06:18I hit the post.

06:19You hit the post.

06:20Posting out, baby.

06:21Right there.

06:22Let's go.

06:23All right, here we go, baby.

06:24He's yelling at me.

06:25Oh, shit.

06:27Oh, shit.

06:29Bend your knees.

06:35Not a chance, Marty.

06:36I got to get fucking closer.

06:38I don't know if you knew.

06:39I'm shooting from fucking out here.

06:40I'm playing for the fucking Blackhawks.

06:42Oh, God.

06:43We're 0 for 3.

06:44All right.

06:45Pat's fucking gone.

06:460 for 3.

06:47Oh, taking the side.

06:52Ha, ha, ha, ha.

06:55Never lost a shootout when I was playing for the Blackhawks.

06:58Yeah, Pat's 0 for 4.

07:01Listen, Scott woke up looking for fucking blood today.

07:05I just got to shoot closer.

07:06That's what I got to do.

07:07I got to shoot closer.

07:08Here we go.

07:11Drop that hand a little more.

07:12There you go.

07:14Your baby's going to score this one.

07:17Oh!

07:18Ha, ha, ha, ha.

07:21I'm going to get it.

07:22I'm going to score here.

07:23I'm going to do it.

07:26Oh!

07:27Ha, ha, ha, ha.

07:30How did I just miss that?

07:32Bambi's coming in.

07:36Oh, he's got the one-hander going.

07:42What the fuck?

07:44What am I doing?

07:46I think I'm fucking Wayne Gretzky on you.

07:490 for 5.

07:500 for 5 for the fellas.

07:53I'll go back to the caner.

07:55Oh, shit.

07:58That was a good track.

07:59This is truly so funny.

08:02All right, 0 for 6, 0 for 5.

08:05All right, he woke up.

08:06He woke up.

08:07He's fucking an animal now.

08:08What the fuck's going on?

08:09Here we go, baby.

08:12Oh!

08:14Ha, ha, ha, ha.

08:17You had an open.

08:20You had an open.

08:21I had it.

08:22You had an open.

08:23Come on, big boy.

08:24I want it.

08:250, 6, 0, 6.

08:27I got to bury one here.

08:32Oh, shit.

08:34Oh, shit.

08:35I'm going to go to the caner.

08:3606, 06, 06, I got a berry one here.

08:45Oh, you fucking prick!

08:47Oh!

08:48Oh!

08:49Oh!

08:50That was good.

08:51That was disgusting.

08:52I didn't know you had that in you.

08:54Look what he did, look what he did.

08:56Woo!

08:57That was good.

08:57Woo!

08:58Woo!

08:59Woo!

09:00You sassy little baby.

09:02I knew it the second I saw you fucking lift your stick up.

09:05That was quick.

09:06We needed something nice for the camera.

09:09I gotta get something here.

09:10Come on.

09:22Nope.

09:23Don't try that shit again and I'll poke check you.

09:25You're right there.

09:26I know, I just keep fucking going too high.

09:29I'm 07, you're 107.

09:32Maybe put the hands down and bend your knees a little more.

09:36You think the knees?

09:37You think the knees are the problem?

09:40Oh, boy.

09:49I really gotta fucking score.

09:51Come on.

09:54Like that?

09:54Yeah.

09:55Pretty good.

09:58Let's do the Scott Darling glide.

10:01Put your toes forward, Martin.

10:05Oh, that's good.

10:06That's good stuff.

10:11There you go.

10:12There you go.

10:14Oh!

10:18No!

10:19No, no, no!

10:20You had me too.

10:22You had me.

10:24Fuck!

10:26We get two more now?

10:27Yeah.

10:27Two more each.

10:28Yeah.

10:29I know what you're going to do, Pat.

10:32All right.

10:35That's called mental warfare.

10:44He's so goddamn fucking big.

10:48He doesn't even have to move.

10:49Martin, you gotta get one.

10:50Come on.

11:00Oh!

11:04Come on!

11:07I'm going to score.

11:08All right, this is it.

11:09One for nine.

11:10One for nine, oh for nine.

11:11Oh for nine.

11:12If I score, it's over.

11:14He's going to fucking rip a clapper.

11:15I know he's going to do it.

11:16So maybe I'll let one loose here?

11:18Yeah, let one loose.

11:19Let it rip.

11:25Oh!

11:28Get out, T!

11:29This is your last chance, Marty.

11:31I think he gave me a faulty stick.

11:35You got him, Marty.

11:36Yeah.

11:36Come on, Bambi.

11:38Come on, Bambi.

11:40Bend those knees.

11:46See ya, bitch.

11:47Fuck!

11:50One more, Scott.

11:50Get back in there.

11:51One.

11:52One more.

11:52It was 10.

11:53One more.

11:54All right.

11:55Here we go.

11:56Come on.

11:57Come on, Marty.

12:10Sorry, buds.

12:11This guy fucking stopped me.

12:14You picked the wrong fucking goalie to go ahead and net.

12:17Ready?

12:18Yeah.

12:19Are you doing 2-on-0s?

12:202-on-0.

12:22With all the marbles.

12:25I'm stuck.

12:26Marty to Maroon.

12:28Back to Marty.

12:35Not going to work, Marty.

12:37Can't get around these legs.

12:38One more, Scott.

12:41Hey, I'm passing this one.

12:43Let's go.

12:44I heard you.

12:45I know what you're doing.

12:53Oh, still got it.

12:58I'm exhausted.

13:02I'm so out of shape.

13:05You won 1-0.

13:07Hey, good shit.

13:08Good stuff.

13:11All right.

13:12That's an episode of Marty vs. Pat.

13:15That was pretty good.

13:17That was good stuff.

13:18You know, I had a good time.

13:19Actually, I think I'm better than I thought.

13:22I thought you were really good.

13:25You had some hands in tight.

13:27It wasn't terrible.

13:28I lifted the puck.

13:29You lifted the puck.

13:30Not terrible.

13:31But shout out.

13:32Good luck with the Blackhawks.

13:34I made a bet with Pat he's going to do my celebration now.

13:37But you ever see a celebration, Scott?

13:39No.

13:43You're like a kid on a ski hill.

13:44Yeah, that's true.

13:45If I score this year, I've got to do the Scott Darlings?

13:53You've got to do that.

13:56Is it called Scott Darling?

13:57Yeah, it's going to be the Scott Darling.

14:00First time skating in two years.

14:01Oh, I love it.

14:02Thank you, Scott.

14:03You guys still can't score.

14:05That was shit.

14:06We'll be back next time for some Marty Bursts.

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